What is the "Book of Mother" ? 

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Every improvement in communication makes the bore more terrible. --- Frank Moore Colby Most men are within a finger's breadth of being mad. --- Diogenes the Cynic (412 BC - 323 BC) Talent hits a target no one else can hit; Genius hits a target no one else can see. --- Arthur Schopenhauer He who lives without folly isn't so wise as he thinks. --- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
Walking up to a department store's fabric counter, a pretty girl asked, "I want to buy this material for a new dress. How much does it cost?" "Only one kiss per yard," replied the smirking male clerk. "That's fine," replied the girl. "I'll take 10 yards." With expectation and anticipation written all over his face, the clerk quickly measured out and wrapped the cloth, then teasingly held it out. The girl snapped up the package and pointed to a little old lady standing behind her. "Grandma is paying for it," she smiled.
A psychiatrist who had tired of listening to the assorted troubles and dreams that poured from his consulting couch, rigged up a tape recorder. Explaining to his patients that he could analyze a case better this way, he would turn on the machine, tell the patient to keep talking and quietly slip out for a beer. This worked well for a while, but one day he looked up from his beer to see the patient who was supposed to be upstairs on the couch. "What are you doing here?" asked the doctor. "Well, Doc," said the patient, "I've taped my dreams and stuff for the last couple of days, and now my tape recorder is upstairs talking to your tape recorder."
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Cassandra Elfers, 21, Independence, KY Volleyball Coach - Jailed for Having Sexual Relationship With 13-Year-Old Reported by The Weekly Vice Cassandra Elfers, a 21-year-old volleyball coach at Sharp Middle School, was jailed Friday after she allegedly had a sexual relationship with a 13-year-old student. According to police, an investigation was launched Sunday after the Pendleton County School District became aware of rumors at the middle school that involved Elfers and the alleged victim. Investigators have released few details about the case except that the alleged victim is a 13-year-old boy who played basketball at the school. Elfers was booked into the Kenton County Detention Center on charges of first-degree sexual abuse. She was released at about 7:30 p.m. the same day after posting bond. Tech Support Pits From: Sandra Q Re: What is the Book of Mother? Dear Webby What is the Book of Mother? Sandra Dear Sandra All I could find on the net was: 820 January 20 Abu Abdallah M ibn Idris al-Sjafi'i, Islamic (Book of Mother), dies. The Book of Mother is published. So I asked Susan, a University lecturer in Washington (state). Her instant answer was: al-Shaf'i' was a Muslim jurist who wrote many works in the 8th-9th centuries (Common Era). His main book on Islamic Jurisprudence is al-Risaalah (the Letter) and the Kitaab al-Umm (Book of the Mother). That one is on his particular interpretation of jurisprudence according to his own philosophy. He is one of the main jurists and has a school of thought named after him. It doesn't really have anything to do with mothers :) it's meant to be a standard for other jurists and judges. even good old wiki has a blurbette on it: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kitab_al-Umm Susan E. B. Thanks to Susan, now we know. It's the Mother of handbooks for jurists and judges. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Fertilize Now For Spring Planting We farm, so we have an abundance of "fresh" fertilizer. The past 2 weeks, we have been collecting it and moving it to our raised garden beds. Many manures, such as horse and cow (among others), will kill a plant if applied directly to it while fresh. Each is different, but cow manure takes 30-45 days to age, so that it is safe for the plants. By adding them to my raised beds now, the heat will be gone by the time we start our planting in mid to late March. If you know a farmer, most will be more than willing to let you go gather some from their pastures at no charge. It's free, organic, and better on the environment than using the ones with chemicals or found in plastic bags. Source: I learned this the hard way, after applying it too close to the growing season years ago. By April from Plattsburg, MO Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
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Two cab drivers met and one asked the other, "Hey, why do you have one side of your cab painted red and the other side blue?" The other driver said, "When I get into an accident, you should see how all the witnesses contradict each other."
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The mother of three notoriously unruly youngsters was asked whether or not she'd have children if she had it to do over again. "Sure," she replied, "but not the same ones."
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Today, Jan 22, in 
0871 Battle at Basing Danish invasion army beats 
   Ethelred of Wessex
1371 King Robert II Stuart of Scotland crowned
1510 Jews are expelled from Colmar Germany
1517 Turks conquer Cairo
1528 England & France declare war on Emperor Charles V
1575 English queen Elizabeth I grants 
  Thomas Tallis & William Byrd music press monopoly
1690 Iroquois tribes renew allegiance to British against French
1760 Battle at Wandewash India British troops beat French
1771 Spain cedes the Falkland Islands to Britain
1775 Marshal Oscar von Lubomirski expels Jews from Warsaw Poland
1873 Britains SS Northfleet sinks at Dungeness England, 300 die
1881 Ancient Egyptian obelisk "Cleopatra's Needle" erected in Central Park
1905 "Bloody Sunday"; Russian demonstrators fired on by tsarist troops
1918 Ukraine proclaimed a free republic (Pro German)
1939 Uranium atom 1st split, Columbia University
1941 1st mass killing of Jews in Romania
1951 Fidel Castro ejected from a Winter League game after 
   beaning batter
1957 Israeli forces withdraw from the Sinai Penisula
1964 World's largest cheese (15,723 kg) manufactured, Wisconsin
1965 US launches TIROS 9 weather satellite
1968 Apollo 5 launched to Moon; unmanned lunar module tests made
1970 1st commercial Boeing 747 flight (Pan Am), 
   New York to London in 6½ hours
1973 US, North & South Vietnam & Vietcong sign boundary accord
1976 Bank robbery in Beirut nets $20-50 million (record)
1992 Princess Sarah Ferguson wears paper bag over her head 
   on airline ride
1995 Palestinian bomb attack in Beit Lid Israel, 21-22 killed
1998 World League of American Football becomes NFL East 
2013  smiled

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