Sound recorder 

Good Morning,  !

Today is Monday, January 28.

Thank you, John McC !
Thank you, Cookie !

Have FUN!

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When everyone is against you, it means that you are absolutely wrong-- or absolutely right. --- Albert Guinon
>Thanks to Dianne for this one: A 6 year old and a 4 year old are raking the yard. The 6 year old asks, "You know what? I think it's about time we started learning to cuss." The 4 year old nods his head in approval. The 6 year old continues,"When we go in for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with hell and you say something with ass." The 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm. When the mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6 year old what he wants for breakfast, he replies, "Aw, hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios." WHACK! He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up,and runs upstairs crying his eyes out, with his mother in hot pursuit,slapping his rear with every step. His mom locks him in his room and shouts, "You can stay there until I let you out!" She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 4 year old and asks with a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?" "I don't know," he blubbers, "but you can bet your fat ass it won't be Cheerios!"
President Calvin Coolidge, 30th U.S. president (1923 to 1929) was a man of very few words. One Sunday he went to church, but his wife, Grace, stayed home. When he returned, she asked, "Was the sermon good?" "Yup," was Coolidge's brief reply. "What was it about?" Grace asked. "Sin." "And what did the minister say?" "Seems to be against it."
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Russell Kent Gordon, 44, Portland, Oregon Jailed After Using Spy Pen To Record Woman Using Breast Pump Reported by The Weekly Vice Russell Kent Gordon, a 44-year-old Portland bonehead, was jailed after he allegedly hid a pen camera on a female co-worker's desk so he could record her using a breast pump. According to the Portland Police Department, Gordon reportedly entered a co-worker's office and hid a pen-style spy camera on her desk to capture recordings of her as she used a breast pump. The woman reportedly found the camera and turned it over to her supervisors. Gordon was fired January 15th after he was recorded placing the camera on the woman's desk. Gordon was booked into the Multnomah County Jail and charged with burglary and invasion of privacy. He was released on his own recognizance. Tech Support Pits From: Gary Re: Sound recorder Dear Webby Was reading the humour letter today and thought I'd send you a link for your readers. this is a great little - simple like falling off a log digital audio workstation (recording program). I have been using it for years and it's still free. It's also possibly the most stable and easiest program I have ever used. Just plug into the Aux In and away you go. They don't make it for Mac so I had to spend $700 on Pro Tools, LOL. If anyone needs, you can certainly give out my e-mail address and I can answer questions on how to get the most out of itů Cheers and have a great week, It is at Gary Dear Gary Thanks for that link! Now anybody, who can string a microphone into the shower, can easily produce better music, than what all the silly Hollywiood favorite screechers foist upon us. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Go Barefoot Whenever Possible I agree with all the comments that said to buy decent, well-fitting shoes instead of cheap ones but sometimes this is really not possible. Forty years back after buying the children properly fitting shoes, there was usually only enough money left for jumble sale shoes for me. My solution was to go barefoot whenever possible. It helps to control the damage done by second hand shoes that don't 'quite' fit! And when the kids grow up and living gets easier, oh, the pleasure of buying new shoes! By Marg from England Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at
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Chicken council says Super Bowl covered WASHINGTON (UPI) -- The National Chicken Council in Washington said rumors of a chicken wing shortage ahead of the Super Bowl are unfounded. Bill Roenigk, chief economist and market analyst for the National Chicken Council, said this week in the 2013 "Wing Report" that Super Bowl watchers shouldn't have too much trouble finding chicken wings to enjoy along with the Feb. 3 showdown between the San Francisco 49ers and Baltimore Ravens, Tribune Newspapers reported Friday. "The good news for consumers is that restaurants plan well in advance to ensure they have plenty of wings for the big game," Roenigk wrote. However, Roenigk cautioned wing-lovers not to wait until the last minute. "If you're planning to cook your own wings, I wouldn't advise being in line at the supermarket two hours before kickoff," he wrote. The report said U.S. consumers are expected to eat 1.23 billion chicken wing "portions" during Super Bowl weekend. "To put that in perspective," the report said, if 1.23 billion wing segments were laid end to end, they would stretch from Candlestick Park in San Francisco to M&T Bank Stadium in Baltimore ... 27 times.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
The little girl was sitting in her grandfather's lap as he read her a goodnight story. From time to time, she would take her eyes off the book and reach up to touch his wrinkled cheek. She was alternately stroking her own cheek and his. Finally she spoke. "Grampa, did God make you?" "Yes, Lucy" he answered, "God made me a long time ago." "Oh" she said, then "Grampa, did God make me too?" "Yes, indeed Lucy" he assured her. "God made you just a little while ago." "Oh" she said. Feeling their respective faces again, she observed, "God's getting better at it now isn't he?"
╗ Sweet Sachets

Today, Jan 28, in 
1099 1st Crusaders begin siege of Hosn-el-Akrad Syria
1393 Fire during Royal Ball at Paris, 4 die (Ball of the Ardents)
1495 Pope gives his son Cesare Borgia as hostage to 
   Charles VIII of France
1547 9-year-old Edward VI succeeds Henry VIII as king of England
1561 By Edict of Orleans persecution of French Huguenots is 
1613 Galileo may have unknowingly viewed undiscovered planet Neptune
1807 London's Pall Mall is 1st street lit by gaslight
1846 Battle of Allwal, Brits beat Sikhs in Punjab (India)
1871 Paris surrenders to Prussians
1878 1st telephone exchange (New Haven CT)
1878 George W Coy hired as 1st full-time telephone operator
1909 US military forces leave Cuba for 2nd time
1916 German colony of Cameroon surrenders to Britain & France
1918 Bomb Strike on Berlin ammunitions factory
1918 Trotsky becomes leader of Reds
1932 Japan occupies Shanghai
1934 1st US ski tow (rope) begins operation (Woodstock VT)
1935 Iceland becomes 1st country to legalize abortion
1942 General Timoshenko's troops move into Ukraine
1942 German troops occupy Benghazi Libya
1944 683 British bombers attack Berlin
1944 U-271 & U-571 sunk off Ireland
1945 General "Vinegar Joe" Stillwell & truck convoy reopen 
   Burma Road to China
1945 Dutch airplanes dump pamphlets on Java
1945 Swedish ships bring food to starving Netherlands
1949 UN Security council condemns Dutch aggression in Indonesia
1958 Construction began on 1st private thorium-uranium 
   nuclear reactor
1960 1st photograph bounced off Moon, Washington DC
1986 25th Space Shuttle (51L)-Challenger 10 explodes 73 
   seconds after liftoff
1988 Canada's Supreme court declares anti-abortion law 
1998 Michelangelo's "Christ & the Woman of Samaria", sold for $7.4 million
2013  smiled

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