Mouse causing need to reboot 

Good Morning,  !

Today is Tuesday, March 12

>From Dr Bill
BTW  - the best pancakes you ever ate are make with Krusteaz 
(don't have to add eggs etc) and beer - instead of water or 
milk - and using different beers, dark, light, ales, 
Guiness etc,  and/or wheat flour makes some amazing 
varieties - all light, fluffy, yummy, etc - typically, 
my guests on Shrove Tuesday eat three helpings or more - 
they are fabulous - yes, both the pancakes and the guests.

Two extremes:
Bernard Anderson Bey, 32, New York, homeless entitlement 
freak, is suing his parents, because they are no longer 
supporting him. 
Albert Lexie, a shoe-shiner working at a Pittsburgh children's 
hospital has donated more than $200,000 of his tips to the 
facility during the past 32 years

Have FUN!

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In politics, absurdity is not a handicap. --- Napoleon Bonaparte (1769 - 1821) It is our responsibilities, not ourselves, that we should take seriously. --- Peter Ustinov "A man's character is his fate. --- Heraclitus (540 BC - 480 BC),
A man observed a sign in the window of a restaurant that read "Unique Breakfast", so he walked in and sat down. The waitress brought him his coffee and asked him what he wanted. "What´s your Unique Breakfast?" he asked inquisitively. "Baked tongue of chicken," she replied proudly. "Baked tongue of chicken? Do you have ANY idea how disgusting that is? I would never even consider eating anything that came out of a chicken´s mouth!" the man fumed. Undaunted, the waitress asked, "Well, what would you like then, sir?" The man replied, "Just bring me some scrambled eggs." "Right, sir."
Have I got a deal for you! Aquaponics is on special for $19 instead of the normal $97! What's Aquaponics? Isn't that the top secret technology some pros use to grow medicinal herbs and stuff in half the time and two to ten times the crop per square foot? Yes, it sure is! It is the technology of combining a fish tank, that produces all the nutrients the plants need, with hydroponics, that cleans that stuff out of the water and preps it for the fish. Very neat and clean WIN-WIN deal! You don't need a shark tank on your balcony. The book tells you how small a fish tank is enough for your tomatoes and carrots and parsley and mushrooms and herbs. If you have a closet, balcony, or garden space, grab Aquaponics, while it is on sale! AND, they throw in $300 worth of additional books! By the way, there is no weeding necessary with Aquaponics!

A linguistics professor was lecturing his class. "In English," he explained, "a double negative forms a positive. In some languages, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative." "However," the professor continued, "there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative." A voice from the back of the room piped up. "Yeah, right."
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Leticia Silva, a 31 Jailed for Sending Children Switchblade Knife, Instructing Them To Murder Grandparents With It Reported by the Weekly Vice Leticia Silva, a 31-year-old Florida woman, has been charged after she allegedly mailed her young children a knife, then instructed them to kill their grandparents with it. According to the Pitt County Sheriff's Office, Silva lost custody of her two daughters (ages 7 and 9) seven years ago when she was arrested in Florida for possession of methamphetamine. The two children were removed from Silva's care and sent to live with their paternal grandparents in Greenville, North Carolina. Both children remain in the care and custody of their grandparents. Investigators say Silva plotted to have the grandparents (her former in-laws) murdered while she was incarcerated in a Florida prison. In December, Silva mailed a switchblade pocket knife to her daughters with a written note instructing them to murder their grandparents with it. Silva then called her daughters around Christmas time and instructed them to grab a steak knife from the kitchen and use it for the murder instead. The murder plot began to unravel in February when the childrens' grandmother found the knife under a pillow while changing the girls' bed sheets. That's when the grandmother brought the two girls to the Pitt County Sheriff's Office, and the girls explained what they had been instructed to do with the knives. Silva, who was temporarily out of jail and had traveled to North Carolina, turned herself in at the Pitt County Detention Center on Monday. She has been charged with four counts of first-degree solicitation to commit murder. She remains in jail in lieu of a $5 million bond. Tech Support Pits From: Susan Re: Mouse causes re-start Dear Webby, I have been having a problem with my computer and mouse for a couple of months now and have not heard of this problem from anyone before. Sometimes when I go to drag a window to a different spot or resize it, the cursor, it's like it's frozen on the screen. So I move the mouse several times to try and move it, however, it never moves and my computer re-starts. This might happen several times a day. Very annoying.......especially if I'm in the middle of something and have not saved it yet. I ran CrapCleaner.....that didn't fix the problem. I replaced the mouse.....that didn't fix the problem. I'm really at a loss here not knowing where to look next. I am using Windoze 7. This has never happened on XP. Any suggestions? Susan Dear Susan That is actually quite common with W7, especially if you have a bargain machine with only 2 GB of RAM. You can go do the dishes and see if it recovers in the meantime. Sometimes it does. If it doesn't recover, hit CTRL SHIFT ESC to start the Task Manager. It might take a while to start up. Windows 7 is good for teaching you patience and humility. Saint Bill figures that is good for you. When the Task Manager finally opens, tab over to "Processes". Sort it by MEM, biggest on top. Chances are good, that the top item is your browser. Highlight it and hit CTRL E to "END PROCESS". Usually that will free enough memory, that you can return to your work and save it. Yes, you CAN do all that without the mouse! It would be a good idea to practise that, so that when you are in a big panic, you can do it as slick as any Eggspurt. While you probably CAN limp along like that, it would be a good idea to hint, that some extra RAM would be an appropriate Easter basket item, or at the very latest, something for Mothers Day. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Treating Chapped Lips If your lips are peeling and chapped, they are annoying and unattractive. Apply a little vasoline to your lips and use a nail file to gently remove any dead skin. Your lips will feel refreshed and look healthy again. Lip gloss can build up on your lips and prevents normal shedding of dead skin cells. Source: Wendy Williams Show By mary jean from Morristown, NJ You can use some of the hand sanitizer, that is available free at a lot of store entrances, on a paper towel, to remove old gloss or "remedies", then smear some Vaseline onto the back of your hand and kiss it. That gives you just the right amount. You need just a little bit to retain a little bit more moisture. If your lips get a barely noticeable erratic tingle or tightening feeling, that is usually an early warning signal, that you are about to notice in a day or two, that you have the flu. If you catch it early enough, you can get rid of it by drinking Silver Water, or by putting 5 drops of Hydrogen Peroxide into each ear for 5 minutes, repeated after 4 hours. If you do that, then you don't get even the half flu, that you get from the flu shots. During flu season, make sure your lips are not cracked and well protected, wipe them only with sanitizer or windshield washer moistened paper towel, and kiss your vaseline smeared hand right afterward, and NEVER rub or touch your eyes unless you have first sanitized your hands. Then you too can avoid the flu for dozens of years, like I have. Have FUN! DearWebby Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at
Nervous about having to MC a relative's or friend's wedding? Get the Wedding MCWedding MC book. It includes all the jokes and coaching you need to be a smash hit!

From Phil I took a part time job as an opinion poll sampler, calling people for their views on various issues. On my very first call, I introduced myself, "Hello, this is a telephone poll." The man replied, "Yeah, and this is a street light!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Two women came before wise King Solomon, dragging between them a young man. "This young man agreed to marry my daughter," said one. "No! He agreed to marry MY daughter," said the other. And so they haggled before the King, until he called for silence. "Bring me my biggest sword," said Solomon, " and I shall hew the young man in half. Each of you shall receive a half." "Sounds good to me,"said the first lady. But the other woman said, "Oh Sire, do not spill innocent blood. Let the other woman's daughter marry him." The wise king did not hesitate a moment. "The young man must marry the first lady's daughter," he proclaimed. "But she was willing to hew him in two!" exclaimed the king's court. "Indeed," said wise King Solomon. "That shows she is the TRUE mother-in-law."
» Camouflage by Critters

Today, March 12, in 
1496 Jews were expelled from Syria.
1609 The Bermuda Islands became an English colony.
1664 New Jersey became a British colony. King Charles II 
  granted land in the New World to his brother James 
  (The Duke of York).
1809 Britain signed a treaty with Persia forcing the 
  French to leave the country.
1879 The British Zulu War began.
1889 Almon B. Stowger applied for a patent for his 
  automatic telephone system.
1894 Coca-Cola was sold in bottles for the first time.
1903 The Czar of Russia issued a decree for freedom of religion
1904 After 30 years of drilling, the tunnel under the Hudson 
  River was completed. The link was between Jersey City, NJ, 
  and New York, NY.
1909 Three U.S. warships were ordered to Nicaragua to stem 
  the conflict with El Salvador.
1911 Dr. Fletcher of Rockefeller Institute discovered the 
  cause of infantile paralysis.
1912 The Girl Scout organization was founded. The original 
  name was Girl Guides. They have since changed back to that.
1923 Dr. Lee DeForest demonstrated phonofilm. It was his 
  technique for putting sound on motion picture film.
1938 The "Anschluss" took place as German troops entered Austria.
1940 Finland surrendered to Russia ending the Russo-Finnish War.
  When the Axis appeared to be winning, they joined Germany.
  When the Allies were obvious to win, they broke with Germany 
  and joined the Allies in 1945
1944 Britain barred all travel to Ireland.
1959 The U.S. House joined the U.S. Senate in approving the 
  statehood of Hawaii.
1985 Former U.S. President Richard M. Nixon announced that 
  he planned to drop Secret Service protection and hire his 
  own bodyguards in an effort to lower the deficit by 
  $3 million. 
1989 About 2,500 veterans and supporters marched at the 
  Art Institute of Chicago to demand that officials 
  remove an American flag placed on the floor as part 
  of an exhibit.
1993 In the U.S., the Pentagon called for the closure of 
  31 major military bases.
1994 The Church of England ordained its first women priests.
1998 Astronomers cancelled a warning that a mile-wide 
  asteroid might collide with Earth saying that calculations 
  had been off by 600,000 miles.
1999 Hungary, Poland and the Czech Republic became members 
  of the North Atlantic Treaty Organization (NATO). All three 
  countries were members of the former Warsaw Pact.
2003 In Utah, Elizabeth Smart was reunited with her family 
  nine months after she was abducted from her home. She had 
  been taken on June 5, 2002, by a drifter, that had 
  previously worked at the Smart home.
2003 The U.S. Air Force announced that it would resume 
  reconnaissance flights off the coast of North Korea. 
  The flights had stopped on March 2 after an encounter 
  with four armed North Korean jets.
2009 It was announced that the Sears Tower in Chicago, IL, 
  would be renamed Willis Tower. Sears was no longer leasing
  the main floor and had moved.
2010 In the U.S., Apple began taking pre-orders for the iPad.
2013  smiled

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