No sound from earphones 

Good Morning,  !

Today is Wednesday, May 1

Half the snow has melted. 
Ignoring the hype and just considering facts, this winter's
total average was half a degree Celsius colder than average
winters. Last time we had that, we had a really nice summer.

Have FUN!

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Americans are benevolently ignorant about Canada, while Canadians are malevolently well informed about the United States. --- J. Bartlett Brebner When a thing ceases to be a subject of controversy, it ceases to be a subject of interest. --- William Hazlitt (1778 - 1830)
A man phoned his doctor late at night saying his wife appeared to have appendicitis. "That's impossible," the physician replied, peeved at being woken up. "She had an appendectomy six years ago. Dont be stupid. Have you ever seen anybody with a second appendix?" "No," the husband replied. "However, have you never seen anybody marrying again after a divorce?"
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>Thanks to Lynn for this: One of my most difficult jobs as a flight attendant is to enforce rules while keeping customers happy. The electronic equipment that comes on board creates the biggest challenge. I walk the aisle asking passengers to turn off computers, electronic games and cell phones, which can create inter- ference in communications between the pilot and the air traffic control tower. During one landing, a man persistently kept his cell phone at his ear. I confronted him and said, "Sir, you cannot talk on your phone until we reach the gate." "I am not talking," he replied. "My wife is. I'm just listening. I can't get her to stop." So I grabbed his phone and showed him how to stop her, and told him, he can get it back when he exits the plane.
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Cara Alexander, 27, Newport News, VA Teacher jailed for Sexting With Student Reported by The Weekly Vice Cara Alexander, a 27-year-old English teacher at Woodside High School, was jailed Friday after she allegedly sent nude pictures to and engaged in an inappropriate relationship with a student. According to Newport News Police, an investigation was launched after the parents of a 17-year-student found nude photographs of Alexander on their son's cell phone and discovered evidence that she was having an inappropriate relationship with him. Investigators say Alexander was the student's teacher before he changed schools recently. No inappropriate physical encounters are believed to have occurred on the school campus. School administrators are preparing to terminate Alexander's employment at the school, according to the district superintendent. Alexander was booked into the Newport News City Jail and charged with 6 felony counts of using a communications system to facilitate certain offenses involving children, six counts of contributing to the delinquency of a minor and 1 felony count of taking indecent liberties with a minor. Tech Support Pits From: Nancy Re: No sound in earphones Hey Webby, Wondered if you could help me. I purchased a set of headphones to plug into my Dell laptop so I could listen to music or watch a DVD without disturbing my husband. BUT, I can't seem to get the headphones to work! I am unable to get any sound out of them. Any thoughts? Nancy Dear Nancy Try the other two of the 3 similar looking sockets with mysterious and hard to see symbols. If you have the machine connected to external speakers, unplug those and plug the headphones into that socket. If you have sound coming from the internal squeakers, that internal squeaker sound will instantly stop, when you have found the right socket. If it doesn't, then call Dell about warranty. If the squeaker sound stops when you have found the right socket, but there is no sound in the headphones, then return the headphones and get different ones. That headphone / external speaker socket is the most fragile part on a laptop. It has a little leaf spring in it, that disconnects the internal squeakers, when external speakers or headphones are plugged in. Because the plugs stick out awkwardly, a lot of undue force gets put on that tiny little spring and the socket, and problems have to be expected. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Repelling Insects in Cabinets Sprinkle a little borax around the corners of your cabinets in your kitchen and bath to repel insects. By Robin Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at
Yes, you CAN repair LCD monitors! A screwdriver and this manual, and you can do it. Get LCD Monitor Repair!

A man absolutely hated his wife's cat and decided to get rid of him one day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park. As he was getting home, the cat was walking up the driveway. The next day he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away. He put the beast out and headed home. Driving back up his driveway, there was the cat! He kept taking the cat further and further and the cat would always beat him home. At last he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and left the cat there. Hours later the man calls home to his wife: "Jen, is the cat there?" "Yes," the wife answers, "why do you ask?" Frustrated, the man answered, "Put that darn thing on the phone, I'm lost! and need directions!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
"Grandpa, I'm really proud of you," said the modish young lady. "What's to be proud of?" asked the old man. The young lady replied, "I noticed that when you sneeze, you've learned to put your hand in front of your mouth, you never used to." "Of course," explained Grandpa. "How else can I catch my teeth?"
Schwartz goes to see his Rabbi. He says, "Rabbi, I think my wife is poisoning me." The Rabbi says, "I'll tell you what...let me talk to her. I'll see what I can find out and I'll let you know." A week later the Rabbi calls Schwartz and says, "I spoke to your wife on the phone for four hours. Well, actually, she spoke for four hours, while I near the phone was..." Schwartz says, "Do you have any advice?" The Rabbi says, "Yeah. Take the poison...."
Dear Webby I finally decided to get the MailWasher from the left side. Should have listened to your advice a lot sooner. It saved me over an hour every day so far, and sorts the mail more accurately than I can by hand. Thanks! Gilbert
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Today, May 1, in
0408 Theodosius II succeeded to the throne of Constantinople.
1308 King Albert was murdered by his nephew John, because 
 he refused his share of the Habsburg lands.
1486 Christopher Columbus convinced Queen Isabella to fund 
 an expedition to the West Indies.
1707 England, Wales and Scotland were united to form 
 Great Britain.
1805 The state of Virginia passed a law requiring all 
 freed slaves to leave the state, or risk either 
 imprisonment or deportation.
1884 The construction of the first American 10-story 
 building began in Chicago, IL.
1898 The U.S. Navy under Dewey defeated the Spanish fleet 
 at Manila Bay in the Philippines.
1905 In New York, radium was tested as a cure for cancer.
1915 A German submarine sank the U.S. ship Gulflight.
1927 Adolf Hitler held his first Nazi meeting in Berlin.
1931 The Empire State Building in New York was dedicated 
 and opened. It was 102 stories tall and was the tallest 
 building in the world at the time.
1937 U.S. President Franklin Roosevelt signed an act 
 of neutrality, keeping the United States out of World War II.
1944 The Messerschmitt Me 262, the first combat jet, 
 made its first flight.
1945 Martin Bormann, private secretary to Adolf Hitler, 
 escaped from the Fuehrerbunker as the Red Army advanced 
 on Berlin.
1945 Admiral Karl Doenitz succeeded Hitler as leader of 
 the Third Reich.
1948 The People's Democratic Republic of Korea 
 (North Korea) was proclaimed.
1958 James Van Allen reported that two radiation belts 
 encircled Earth.
1960 Francis Gary Powers' U-2 spy plane was shot down 
 over the Soviet Union. Powers was taken prisoner.
1961 Fidel Castro announced there would be no more elections 
 in Cuba.
1968 In the second day of battle, U.S. Marines, with the 
 support of naval fire, continue their attack on a 
 North Vietnamese Division at Dai Do.
1970 Students at Kent State University riot in downtown 
 Kent, OH, in protest of the American invasion of Cambodia.
1971 The National Railroad Passenger Corp. (Amtrak) went 
 into service. It was established by the U.S. Congress to 
 run the nation's intercity railroads.
1981 The Japanese government announced that it would limit 
 passenger car exports to the United States over the next 
 three years.
1986 The Tass News Agency reported the Chernobyl nuclear 
 power plant accident.
1986 Bill Elliott set a stock car speed record with his Ford 
 Thunderbird in Talladega, AL. Elliott reached a speed of 
 212.229 mph.
1992 On the third day of the Los Angeles riots resulting 
 from the Rodney King beating trial. King appeared in public 
 to appeal for calm, he asked, "Can we all get along?"
2001 Chandra Levy was last seen in Washington, DC. Her remains 
 were found in Rock Creek Park on May 22, 2002. California 
 Congressman Gary Condit was questioned in the case due to 
 his relationship with Levy.
2011 U.S. President Barack Obama announced that U.S. soldiers 
 had killed Osama bin Laden in Pakistan.
2013  smiled

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