Delayed emails 

Good Morning,  !

Today is Tuesday, May 14

Have FUN!

If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

The proper way to garden is to plant alphabetically: asparagus, beets, carrots, dill, endive etc - that way "weeds" will all be together in one place. --- Dr Bill Farmer
One day a beautiful woman pulled up to his house in a new Mercedes. She asked Ole if he would paint her in the nude. This was the first time anyone had made that request. As he hesitated, she said money was no object; she was willing to pay $5000. Not wanting to get in trouble with his wife, Ole asked the lady to wait while he went in the house to talk it over with Lena , his wife. In a few minutes he returned and said to the beautiful young lady, "Yah, shure, you betcha. I'll paint you in the nude. But I'll haff ta leave my socks on so I'll haff a place to vipe my brushes".
THE 30 MOST COMMON PC ISSUES AND FIXES This book includes the best solutions posted on the Internet (blogs,forums,manuals,etc) combined with the 10 years of PC repair experience of the author Sebastian Nesh. It can be used anytime by anyone. No specialized knowledge required. You don't need to be tech guy to use this book! Get the FIXES!

>From Ed My friend's father is a locksmith in a resort town. Once he saw a group of beach goers park near his shop and dump trash from their car on his property. As soon as they were out of sight, and walking towrds the beach, the locksmith picked the lock on their car door, put their garbage back inside, and his kitchen garbage too. Then he rolled up all the windows to make it nice and hot in there, and locked the car.
Click on the picture for the large version
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Nicholas Bailey, 31, and Sabrina Morton, 26, in Spartanburg, South Carolina Testicle Attacker Reported by The Weekly Vice A South Carolina couple Nicholas Bailey, 31, and Sabrina Morton, 26, were jailed Sunday after they allegedly got into a brawl that didn't end well for Bailey's testicles. According to the Spartanburg County Sheriff's Office, Bailey came home intoxicated and attempted to quietly sleep it off in the couple's shower.Sabrina Morton didn't want to let that happen and began arguing and shoving. Investigators say the couple shoved each other back and forth until Bailey pulled a chunk of hair out of Morton's head. In retaliation, Morton used her nails to send Bailey's testicles a message. When deputies arrived on the scene, Bailey was sitting naked on the couch, bleeding from multiple lacerations to his genital area. Bailey and Morton were booked into the Spartanburg County Jail and charged with domestic violence. They were released after posting bail. Tech Support Pits From: Jenn Re: Late mails Dear Webby I am still plagued with e-mails coming in to me a day later. My friends need me and say I never answer...Do you have an idea why the e-mails from certain people are not reaching me till hours later. My Puter is on all the time....I write from MSN and receive my e-mails from a Lot of Outlook users. Could that be the reason? Jenn Dear Jenn Micosoft has been telling you for some time, that MSN and HoeMail are obsolete and will be shut down any day soon. You believed Microsoft, that Windows 7 was good and suitable punishment for the sins of your youth, why do you choose to ignore their urging to stop using MSN and Hoemail? You do have a fairly good local ISP, and part of what you are paying for is a proper email address. Why don't you start using that? You can use Thunderbird, Outlook, Outlook Depressed, Eudora, Pegasus, or any of dozens more email programs with that address. There really is absolutely NO reason to continue using MSN or Hoemail. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Store Canned Beans Upside Down Preventing Bathtub Slip and Falls I love a tub bath, however, getting out of the tub can be kind of tricky for an old lady like me especially when the tub is slippery. I have found that placing a towel down in the tub before getting up makes it much easier. It keeps me from slipping and I have no fear of falling. While standing in the tub on the towel, I dry myself off then turn around and wipe down the tile and around the tub. When I get out of the tub, I'm dry and so is the bathroom. By Litter Gitter Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at
Grow food with a minimum amount of work in a minimum amount of space with Food4Wealth. Absolutely everything you need to know to grow healthy, fresh organic food, without all the problems. Finally, a method of growing food that is reliable. It also produces an abundance of food and is easy to understand. This package includes a fully illustrated step by step manual, PLUS AudioBook and over 60 minutes of video. Get your veggies on your balcony or back yard, and stop worrying about harmful chemicals! Get Food4Wealth Now! 60 day money back guarantee!

Two friends are discussing the possibility of love. "I thought I was in love three times," one friend says. "How so?" his friend asks. "Five years ago I deeply cared for a woman who wanted nothing to do with me." "Was that not love?" his friend asks. "No," he replies. "That was obsession. And then two years ago I deeply cared for an attractive woman who didn't understand me." "Was that love?" "No," he replies. "That was lust. And just last year I met a woman aboard a cruise ship to the Caribbean. She was smart, funny, and a great conversationalist. And everywhere we met on that boat, I would get this strange sensation in the pit of my stomach." "Was that love?" his friend asks. "No," he replies. "That was seasickness."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
When Mark, took his beat-up pickup truck to our insurance agent for a pre-insurance inspection, the teen-age receptionist was sent to look over the truck. Armed with a checklist and a few simple questions, she breezed through the chore. When she asked, "What are the age and make of the vehicle?" Mark replied, "It's a '75 Ford." Apologetic about its des- perate condition, he added, "It's an old fossil." Inside, the office assistant entered the data into her computer and frowned. "Is there a problem?" asked Mark. "Mr. Evans, I've been in insurance a while," she explained, "but I've never heard of a Ford Fossil."
» Old Lace

Today, May 14, in
1264 King Henry III was captured by his brother in law Simon 
 deMontfort at the Battle of Lewes in France.
1509 In the Battle of Agnadello, French defeated Venitians 
 in Northern Italy.
1610 French King Henri IV (Henri de Navarre) was assassinated 
 by a fanatical monk, François Ravillac.
1643 Louis XIV became King of France at age 4 upon the death 
 of his father, Louis XIII.
1796 The first smallpox vaccination was given by Edward Jenner.
1811 Paraguay gained independence from Spain.
1853 Gail Borden applied for a patent for condensed milk.
1862 The chronograph was patented by Adolphe Nicole.
1878 The name Vaseline was registered by Robert A. Chesebrough.
1879 Thomas Edison incorporated the Edison Telephone Company of Europe.
1897 "The Stars and Stripes Forever" by John Phillip Sousa was 
 performed for the first time.
1897 Guglielmo Marconi made the first communication by wireless 
1935 The Philippines ratified an independence agreement.
1940 The Netherlands surrendered to Nazi Germany.
1942 The British, while retreating from Burma, reached India.
1948 Prime Minister David Ben-Gurion proclaimed the independent 
 State of Israel as British rule in Palestine came to an end.
1955 The Warsaw Pact, a Easterb European mutual-defense treaty, 
 was signed in Poland by eight communist bloc countries including 
 the Soviet Union.
1973 Skylab One was launched into orbit around Earth as the first 
 U.S. manned space station.
1975 U.S. forces raided the Cambodian island of Koh Tang and recaptured 
 the American merchant ship Mayaguez. All 40 crew members were released 
 safely by Cambodia. About 40 U.S. servicemen were killed in the 
 military operation.
1996 A tornado hit 80 villages in nothern Bangladesh. More than 440 
 people were killed.
1999 North Korea returned the remains of six U.S. soldiers that had 
 been killed during the Korean War.
2013  smiled

[ view entry ] ( 12 views )   |  permalink  |  print article  |   ( 3 / 544 )

<<First <Back | 65 | 66 | 67 | 68 | 69 | 70 | 71 | 72 | 73 | 74 | Next> Last>>