Clarifying old pictures 

Good Morning,  !

Today is Tuesday, May 28.

Have FUN!

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Acquaintance, n.: A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to. --- Ambrose Bierce (1842 - 1914) Basic research is what I am doing when I don't know what I am doing. --- Wernher von Braun (1912 - 1977) An open ear is the only believable sign of an open heart. --- David Augsburger
Thanks to Tammy for this story: My husband, son and I had stopped to take in a spectacular sunset and were on our way back to our car, when four Buddhist monks walked by. When our son asked about them, I explained, "Their life is a quest for enlightenment." "I wonder what kind of car they drive," my husband said and jokingly suggested, "A Ford Focus?" "Or a Honda Odyssey," I said. The monks got into a Nissan Pathfinder.
Hardware Diagnostics If you are not sure, that the problem is messed up software, get the Microscope V16 Software Hardware Diagnostics With Over 250 Proprietary Functions. That's what the Pro's use to quickly determine what needs to be replaced or upgraded.

* Lerman's Law of Technology: Any technical problem can be overcome given enough time and money. Corollary: You are never given enough time or money. * Murphy's First Law for Wives: If you ask your husband to pick up five items at the store and then you add one more as an afterthought, he will forget two of the first five. * Kauffman's Paradox of the Corporation: The less important you are to the corporation, the more your tardiness or absence is noticed. * The Salary Axiom: The pay raise is just large enough to increase your taxes and just small enough to have no effect on your take-home pay. * Miller's Law of Insurance: Insurance covers everything except what happens. * First Law of Living: As soon as you start doing what you always wanted to be doing, you'll want to be doing something else. * Isaac's Strange Rule of Staleness: Any food that starts out hard will soften when stale. Any food that starts out soft will harden when stale. * Kenny's Law of Auto Repair: The part requiring the most consistent repair or replacement will be housed in the most inaccessible location. * The Grocery Bag Law: The candy bar you planned to eat on the way home from the market is hidden at the bottom of the grocery bag. * Lampner's Law of Employment: When leaving work late, you will go unnoticed. When you leave work early, you will meet the boss in the parking lot. * Loftus' Law: Some people manage by the book, even though they don't know who wrote the book or even which book it is.
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Latasha Renee Love, 37, Charlotte, North Carolina Mom Has Child Busted For Theft Of Her Pop-Tarts Reported by The Smoking Gun A North Carolina mother had her son arrested this week for taking her Pop-Tarts without permission, police report. The child was busted on a larceny charge, according to the Charlotte-Mecklenburg Police Department, whose officers were summoned Monday night to a Charlotte home by Latasha Renee Love, the accused juvenile’s 37-year-old mother. A police report notes that “the known suspect stole Pop-tarts belonging to his mother at their home at 530 Goldstaff Ln. The suspect was juvenile arrested at the time of the offence.” Cops described the stolen goods as “Foodstuffs” valued at $5. Love, who reportedly has had discipline issues with her child, apparently decided to have him arrested as some kind of a lesson. Love is pictured above in a mug shot snapped after a September 2009 drunk driving arrest. The misdemeanor case against the boy will be handled in juvenile court. Tech Support Pits From: Bonny Re: Fuzzy pictures Dear Webby I have a bunch of older digital pictures that are quite fuzzy by today's standards. How do you make fuzzy pictures clear and sharp? Bonny Dear Holly As long as it is not motion blur or jitters, you have a very good chance at clarifying the pictures. If you have Paintshop Pro, increase the image size 10-15%, then use the "Clarify" button. Increase the size again and clarify once more. By now the pricture is probably getting rather coarse looking. Now use the Effects tool and select "Edge Preserving Smooth". After that, shrink the picture to original size. It should be quite acceptable now. This trick works pretty well on original pictures, but nothing works, if a picture has been saved a few times with a high JPG compression. Always work in PSP or PSD or PNG format, until all work is completed. Then save in that format first before doing a final save in JPG format. If it is for the web, you can leave it in PNG format. Most browsers can handle that. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Freeze and Bake a Few Cookies at a Time My husband and I are what I call "cookie pigs"! If I make 30 cookies, we'll eat 30 cookies. Needless to say, we don't need 30 cookies. What I do now, since we came to our senses, is make a double batch of our favorite cookie recipe, bake a few for now, and put the others in the freezer. I prepare them just as if I were going to bake them now and place closely together on a cookie sheet. After they're frozen very hard (I wait a night), I put them in a plastic container separated with waxed paper. Then when we want cookies, I can bake 4 (they're small!) and we have 4. Sure helps to control our eating but still allows us to have treats. By Judi Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at
Have I got a deal for you! Aquaponics is on special for $27 instead of the normal $97! What's Aquaponics? It's top secret technology some pros use to grow medicinal herbs and stuff in half the time and two to ten times the crop per square foot? Yes, it sure is! It is the technology of combining a fish tank, that produces all the nutrients the plants need, with hydroponics, that clean that stuff out of the water and preps it for the fish. Very neat and clean WIN-WIN deal! You don't need a shark tank on your balcony. The book tells you how small a fish tank is enough for your tomatoes and carrots and parsley and mushrooms and herbs. If you have a closet, balcony, or garden space, grab Aquaponics, while it is on sale! AND, they throw in $300 worth of additional books! By the way, there is NO WEEDING necessary with Aquaponics!

Thanks to Sandie for this story: A man who just died is delivered to the mortuary wearing an expensive, expertly tailored black suit. The mortician asks the deceased's wife how she would like the body dressed. He points out that the man does look good in the black suit he is already wearing. The widow, however, says that she always thought her husband looked his best in blue, and that she wants him in a blue suit. She gives the mortician a blank check and says, "I don't care what it costs, but please have my husband in a blue suit for the viewing." The woman returns the next day for the wake. To her delight, she finds her husband dressed in a gorgeous blue suit with a subtle chalk stripe; the suit fits him perfectly. She says to the mortician, "Whatever this cost, I'm very satisfied. You did an excellent job and I'm very grateful. How much did you spend?" To her astonishment, the mortician presents her with the blank check. "There's no charge," he says. "No, really, I must compensate you for the cost of that exquisite blue suit!" she says. "Honestly, ma'am," the mortician says, "It cost nothing. You see, a deceased gentleman of about your husband's size was brought in shortly after you left yesterday, and he was wearing an attractive blue suit. I asked his wife if she minded him going to his grave wearing a black suit instead, and she said it made no difference as long as he looked nice. So I switched the heads."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
A very self-important college freshman at a recent football game took it upon himself to explain to a senior citizen sitting next to him why it was impossible for the older generation to understand his own. "You grew up in a different, actually almost primitive, world," the student said loud enough for the whole crowd to hear. "We young people today grew up with television, jet planes, space travel, man walking on the moon, our spaceships have visited Mars...We even have nuclear energy, electric and hydrogen cars, computers with light-speed processing and uh.." Taking advantage of a pause for breath in the student's litany, the "wizened" one said, "You're right, Son. We didn't have those things when we were we invented them...... you arrogant little TURKEY!! All you invented so far is rap, saggy pants and and rear cleavage. Now......what else are you doing for the next generation??"
» Red Clover

Today, May 27, in
585 BC Thales Miletus predicted a solar eclipse.
585 BC The Persian-Lydian battle ended.
1533 England's Archbishop declared the marriage of 
 King Henry VIII to Anne Boleyn valid.
1805 Napoleon was crowned in Milan, Italy.
1863 The first black regiment left Boston to fight 
 in the U.S. Civil War.
1900 Britain annexed the Orange Free State.
1918 Azerbaijan declared independence.
1928 Chrysler Corporation merged with Dodge Brothers, Inc.
1937 U.S. President Franklin Roosevelt pushed a button in 
 Washington, DC, signaling that vehicular traffic could 
 cross the newly opened Golden Gate Bridge in California.
1940 During World War II, Belgium surrendered to Germany.
1976 The Peaceful Nuclear Explosion Treaty was signed, 
 limiting any nuclear explosion regardless of its purpose 
 to a yield of 150 kilotons.
1987 Mathias Rust, a 19-year-old West German pilot, landed 
 a private plane in Moscow's Red Square after evading 
 Soviet air defenses. He was released August 3, 1988.
1995 An earthquake in the Russian town Neftegorsk killed 
 at least 2000 people. It had a magnitude of 7.5.
1996 U.S. President Clinton's former business partners 
 in the Whitewater land deal were convicted of fraud.
1998 Dr. Susan Terebey discovered a planet outside of 
 our solar system with the use of photos taken by the 
 Hubble Space Telescope.
1999 In Milan, Italy, Leonardo de Vinci's "The Last Supper" 
 was put back on display after more than 20 years of 
 restoration work.
2002 Russia became a limited partner in NATO with the 
 creation of the NATO-Russia Council.
2013  smiled

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