What kind of head set is best? 

Good Morning,  !

Today is Monday, June 10

By the time you read this, I will be on the road to Calgary
for my monthly eye injections. 
That means no Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday newsletters.
I will be missing you!

Your wheels: Here is Jim and Linda's Dream Car: Webby here is my wife's and my dream vehicle, 45 foot motor home with 3 slide-outs on a Volvo chassis by Powerhouse Coaches. We would travel all over the USA and Canada. Jim & Linda H. MN USA
Thanks Jim and Linda Send me pictures of YOUR wheels, or dream wheels! Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

The most radical revolutionary will become a conservative the day after the revolution. --- Hannah Arendt (1906 - 1975)
SIXTEEN STEPS TO BUILD A CAMPFIRE 1. Split dead limb into fragments and shave one fragment into slivers. 2. Bandage left thumb. 3. Chop other fragments into smaller fragments 4. Bandage left foot. 5. Make pyramid structure of slivers (include those embedded in hand) 6. Light Match 7. Light Match 8. Repeat "a Scout is cheerful" and light match. 9. Apply match to slivers, add wood fragments, and blow gently into base of fire. 10. Apply burn ointment to nose. 11. When fire is burning, collect more wood. 12. Upon discovering that fire has gone out while out searching for more wood, soak wood from can labeled 'kerosene'. 13. Treat face and arms for second-degree burns. 14. Re-label can to read 'gasoline'. 15. When fire is burning well, add all remaining firewood. 16. When thunder storm has passed, repeat steps. --------------------- Modern alternative: 1. Point to the sign that forbids camp fires. 2. Click the propane BBQ ON.
Little Johnny was afraid of the dark. One night his mother told him to go out to the back porch and bring her the broom. Little Johnny turned to his mother and said, "Mama, I don't want to go out there. It's dark." His mother smiled reassuringly at Little Johnny. "You don't have to be afraid of the dark," she explained. "Jesus is out there. He'll look after you and protect you." Little Johnny looked at his mother real hard and asked, "Are you sure he's out there?" "Yes, I'm sure. He is everywhere, and he is always ready to help you when you need him," she said. Little Johnny thought about that for a minute and then went to the back door and cracked it a little. Peering out into the darkness, he called, "Jesus? If you're out there, would you please hand me the broom?"
Grow Your Greatest Garden Ever in Do-It-Yourself Built Waist High Raised Beds! It's really easy, when you got detailled instructions. You even get videos to show how easy it is! With the GardenRack style there is no more bending down. No more kneeling! Everything is at the height, that is the most comfortable for YOU! No special skills or tools required. Give the lumber list to Home Depot, and they will cut and deliver it. Half an afternoon of screwing around with a drill used as a power screwdriver, and it is done. The second one will take less than half an hour. Get the GardenRack now!

The man was in no shape to drive, so he wisely left his car parked and walked home. As he was walking unsteadily along, he was stopped by a policeman."What are you doing out here at 2 A.M.?" asked the officer. "I'm going to a leckschure." the man said. "And who is going to give a lecture at this hour?" the cop asked. "My wife," said the man."Wanna lischen to the lekschure wif me?"
Thanks to Lillemor for this picture of part of her garden. Click on the picture for the large version
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Kelly Ann Garcia, 29, Houston, Texas Teacher Jailed for Repeatedly Having Having Sex With Gossipy Student. Reported by The Weekly Vice Kelly Ann Garcia, a 29-year-old teacher at Hastings High School, has been jailed after she allegedly had sex with a 16-year-old female student. According to police, a relationship developed between Garcia and a 16-year-old student after the two met through a mutual friend in March of this year. Investigators say Garcia would then stay after school with the student working on "various projects" even though Garcia was not the student's teacher. At one point Garcia reportedly approached the girl's parents and told them that she would like to "mentor" their daughter. The relationship quickly changed, however, when Garcia invited the student to Starbucks and informed her that she had been having erotic dreams about her. About a week later, Garcia told the student that she had broken up with her boyfriend and the two expressed feelings for one another. The following day, according to the arrest report, Garcia and the student got together and spent the evening "kissing passionately." The next day, Garcia and the student went to a Katz Boutique and Sex Shop where Garcia purchased a sex toy with her credit card. Garcia then drove the student back to her apartment where the two engaged in sex. The victim told investigators that she and Garcia engaged in sex multiple times over the next few days. The alleged affair came to light when the teen bragged about the relationship to other students. Word eventually reached a school administrator who contacted police. Detectives say Garcia continued to see the student even though an investigation was underway. The teen's father caught Garcia and their daughter together at a local park, however, Garcia fled to her car and sped off before he could confront her. Investigators were able to recover the receipt from Katz Boutique showing that she had purchased a sex toy on the day the victim indicated. Detectives also obtained phone records, text messages and a photograph of Garcia and the teen kissing. Following a month-long investigation, Garcia was booked into jail and charged with indecency with a child and sexual assault of a child. She was released after posting a $60,000 bond. Tech Support Pits From: Tiny Re: Headset Dear Webby I'm interested in getting a mic. for my computer. Preferably one with a headset. Could you reccomend a good one with little or no feedback and distortion? Thanks in advance! Tiny Dear Tiny Modern headsets don't have feedback or distortion problems. As long as you avoid the single ear types, just about any headset will be fine. Most of them eliminate feedback by actually using it to suppress ambient noise by electronically subtracting it. Cup types are more comfortable than ON-Ear, and those are more comfortable than IN-Ear. With Cup and ON-Ear the leather (or fake leather) cushion types are more comfortable and usually have better acoustics than the bare foam cushion types, but are also more expensive. Unless you have "tall hair", traditional over-the-head hoops are more comfortable than behind-the-head horizontal hoops. If you browse to http://dalco.com and type headset into the search field, you will see about 10 headsets ranging from $6 to just over $20. They even have a wireless headset for under $10. TigerDirect also usually has a good selection of headsets. For slightly more you can get the same from Walmart. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Paper Clips to Fix a Hem If you have no straight pins use paper clips to keep folded-over fabric in place when sewing a simple hem. Just slide the paper clip along the material as you work. Works really well. By coville123 Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
All Time Dumbest Questions Asked by Banff Park Tourists Yes, they're ALL TRUE as heard at the information kiosks manned by Parks Canada staff!) 1. How do the elk know they're supposed to cross at the "Elk Crossing"signs? 2. At what elevation does an elk become a moose? 3. Tourist: "How do you pronounce 'Elk'?" Park Information Staff: " 'Elk' " Tourist: "Oh". 4. Are the bears with collars tame? 5. Is there anywhere I can see the bears pose? 6. Is it okay to keep an open bag of bacon on the picnic table, or should I store it in my tent? 7. Where can I find Alpine Flamingos? 8. I saw an animal on the way to Banff today - could you tell me what it was? 9. Are there birds in Canada? 10. Did I miss the turnoff for Canada? 11. Where does Alberta end and Canada begin? 12. Do you have a map of the State of Jasper? 13. Is this the part of Canada that speaks French, or is that Saskatchewan? 14. If I go to B.C., do I have to go through Ontario? 15. Which is the way to the Columbia Ricefields? 16. How far is Banff from Canada? 17. What's the best way to see Canada in a day? 18. Do they search you at the B.C. border? 19. When we enter B.C. do we have to convert our money to British pounds? 20. Where can I buy a raccoon hat? ALL Canadians own one, don't they? 21. Are there phones in Banff? 22. So it's eight kilometres away... is that in miles? 23. We're not on the decibel system ya know. 24. Where can I get my husband really, REALLY lost?? 25. Is that two kilometres by foot or by car? 26. Don't you Canadians know anything? 27. Where do you put the animals at night? 28. Tourist: "How do you get your lakes so blue?" Park staff: "We take the water out in the winter and paint the bottom." Tourist: " Oh 29. And the most common question, also referred to as the mating call of the blue haired Winnebagan: "An haw much ees dat in reel mohney?" 30. The mating call of the males is:"We're the Fog Owie?"
Forceful Insecticides and fertilizers from Home Made Formula! Discover Secret Information that lets you use cheap household stuff to beat the expensive storebought insecticides, pesticides and fertilizers! Get the famous John Perez book and articles for a song with this Special Deal!

A fire started on some grassland near a farm in Indiana. The fire department from the nearby town was called to put the fire out. The fire proved to be more than the small town fire department could handle, so someone suggested that a rural volunteer fire department be called. The volunteer fire department arrived in a dilapidated old fire truck. They drove straight towards the fire and stopped right in the middle of the flames. The volunteer firemen jumped off the truck and frantically started spraying water in all directions and beating the fire out by flaling it with their jackets. Soon they had snuffed out the center of the fire, dividing the flames into two easily controllable parts. Now the farmer was so impressed with the volunteer fire department's work and so grateful that his farm and crops had been spared, he presented the volunteer fire department with a check for $1000. A local news reporter asked the volunteer fire captain what the department planned to do with the funds. "That should be obvious," he responded. "The very first thing we're gonna do is get the brakes fixed on that stupid old fire truck."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
"Danielle keeps repeating it over and over again. We've been back to this animal shelter at least five times. It has been weeks now since we started all of this," the mother told the volunteer. "What is it she keeps asking for?" the volunteer asked. "Puppy size!" replied the mother. "Well, we have plenty of puppies, if that's what she's looking for." "I know...we have seen most of them," the mom said in frustration. Just then Danielle came walking into the office "Well, did you find one?" asked her mom. "No, not this time," Danielle said with sadness in her voice. "Can we come back on the weekend?" The two women looked at each other, shook their heads and laughed. "You never know when we will get more dogs. Fortunately, there's always a supply," the volunteer said. Danielle took her mother by the hand and headed to the door. "Don't worry, I'll find one this weekend," she said. Over the next few days both mom and dad had long conversations with her. They both felt she was being too particular. "It's this weekend or we're not looking any more," Dad finally said in frustration. "We don't want to hear anything more about puppy size either," Mom added. Sure enough, they were the first ones in the shelter on Saturday morning. By now Danielle knew her way around, so she ran right for the section that housed the smaller dogs. Tired of the routine, mom sat in the small waiting room at the end of the first row of cages. There was an observation window so you could see the animals during times when visitors weren't permitted. Danielle walked slowly from cage to cage, kneeling periodically to take a closer look. One by one the dogs were brought out and she held each one. One by one she said, "Sorry, you're not the one." It was the last cage on this last day in search of the perfect pup. The volunteer opened the cage door and the child carefully picked up the dog and held it closely. This time she took a little longer. "Mom, that's it! I found the right puppy! He's the one! I know it!" she screamed with joy. "It's the puppy size!" "But it's the same size as all the other puppies you held over the last few weeks," Mom said. "No not size ---- the sighs. When I held him in my arms, he sighed," she said. "Don't you remember? When I asked you one day what love is, you told me love depends on the sighs of your heart. The more you love, the bigger the sigh!" The two women looked at each other for a moment. Mom's eyes gathered tears. As she stooped down to hug the child. "Mom, every time you hold me, I sigh. When you and Daddy come home from work and hug each other, you both sigh. I knew I would find the right puppy if it sighed when I held it in my arms," she said. Then holding the puppy up close to her face she said, "Mom, he loves me. I heard the sighs of his heart!"
50's and 60's Jukebox

Today, June 10, in
1776 The Continental Congress appointed a committee to write 
 a Declaration of Independence.
1793 The Jardin des Plantes zoo opened in Paris. It was the 
 first public zoo.
1801 The North African State of Tripoli declared war on the U.S. 
 The dispute was over merchant vessels being able to travel 
 safely through the Mediterranean.
1898 U.S. Marines landed in Cuba during Spanish-American War.
1902 The "outlook" or "see-through" envelope was patented 
 by Americus F. Callahan.
1909 The SOS distress signal was used for the first time. 
 The Cunard liner SS Slavonia used the signal when it wrecked 
 off the Azores.
1916 Mecca, under control of the Turks, fell to the Arabs 
 during the Great Arab Revolt.
1920 The Republican convention in Chicago endorsed woman 
1925 The state of Tennessee adopted a new biology text book 
 that denied the theory of evolution.
1935 Alcoholic Anonymous was founded by William G. Wilson 
 and Dr. Robert Smith.
1940 Italy declared war on France and Britain. In addition, 
 Canada declared war on Italy.
1943 Laszlo Biro patented his ballpoint pen. Biro was a 
 Hungarian journalist.
1943 The Allies began bombing Germany around the clock.
1946 Italy established a republic replacing its monarchy.
1948 Chuck Yeager, first American to exceeded the speed of 
 sound in the Bell XS-1.
1954 General Motors announced the gas turbine bus had 
 been produced successfully.
1967 Israel and Syria agreed to a cease-fire that ended 
 the Six-Day War.
1971 The U.S. ended a 21-year trade embargo of China.
1984 The U.S. Army successfully tested an antiballistic missile.
1984 The United States and the Vatican established full 
 diplomatic relations for the first time in 117 years.
1985 The Israeli army pulled out of Lebanon after 1,099 days.
1993 It was announced by scientists that genetic material was 
 extracted from an insect that lived when dinosaurs roamed 
 the Earth.
1994 U.S. President Clinton intensified sanctions against 
 Haiti's military leaders. U.S. commercial air travel was 
 suspended along with most financial transactions between 
 Haiti and the U.S.
1996 Britain and Ireland opened Northern Ireland peace talks. 
 The IRA's political arm Sinn Fein was excluded.
1998 The Wisconsin Supreme Court ruled that poor children 
 in Milwaukee could attend religious schools at taxpayer expense.
2013  smiled

[ view entry ] ( 11 views )   |  permalink  |  print article  |   ( 3 / 662 )

<<First <Back | 64 | 65 | 66 | 67 | 68 | 69 | 70 | 71 | 72 | 73 | Next> Last>>