Humor: Precise picture positioning in WORD 

Good Morning,  !
Today is Thursday, August 22.

"A million muslims surrounded by 2 million hogs!”
Muslims plan to make a "Million Muslims" march in DC.
Their march is to protest “anti-Islamic bigotry in the U.S.” 
and then turned into a “March Against Fear”.

The motto of the bikers is “To honor those who were killed 
on 911 and our armed forces who fought those who 
precipitated this attack!”

If you can ride, or drive a support vehicle, contact the
organizers of the ride!

All the patriot Riders, that have protected the families of 
fallen heros from the Westboro Perverts, will of course be 
there too.

Even if there are only 1 1/2 million bikes, that is going 
to be an awesome sound!

Have FUN!

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It's amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawnmower, snow blower, or vacuum cleaner. Q: What's the difference between a church bell and a politician? A: A church bell peals from the steeple. --- Stan Kegel Old age is when former classmates are so gray and wrinkled and bald, they don't recognize you.
>From NanaRina A Chinese guy goes into a Jewish-owned establishment to buy black bras, size 38 D. The Jewish store keeper, known for his skills as a businessman, Says that black bras are rare and that he is finding it very difficult to buy them from his suppliers. Therefore he has to charge $50.00 for them. The Chinese guy buys 25 bras He returns a few days later and this time orders fifty. The Jewish owner tells him that they have become even harder to get and charges him $60.00 each. The Chinese guy returns a month later and buys the store's remaining stock of 50, and this time for $75.00 each. The Jewish owner is somewhat puzzled by the large demand for black size 38 D bras and asks the Chinese guy, & I quote "...please tell me - What do you do with all these black bras?" The Chinese guy answers: "I cut them in half and sell them as skull caps to Jewish men for $200.00 each."
Many girls like to marry a military man - he can cook, sew, and make beds and is in good health, and he's already used to taking orders snd getting yelled at.
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Here is a picture of the mayor wishing Dad a happy 90th birthday Dad's 90th
Thanks to Cookie for this pictur of lightning in her area: Click on the picture for the large version
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to James Francis Edwards Jr., 15, Michael Dewayne Jones, 17, and Chancey Allen Luna, 16, all of Duncan, Okla. Read more: ... z2ceucpUgu Murder just for fun DUNCAN, Okla. -- With a motive that's both chilling and simple -- to break up the boredom of an Oklahoma summer -- three teenagers randomly targeted an Australian collegiate baseball player who was attending school in the U.S. and killed him for fun, prosecutors said as they charged two of the boys with murder. Prosecutor Jason Hicks on Tuesday called the boys "thugs" as he described how Christopher Lane, 22, of Melbourne, was shot once in the back and died along a tree-lined road on Duncan's well-to-do north side. He said the three teens, from the grittier part of town, chose Lane at random and that one of the boys "thinks it's all a joke." Hicks charged Chancey Allen Luna, 16, and James Francis Edwards Jr., 15, with first-degree murder. Under Oklahoma law they will be tried as adults. Michael Dewayne Jones, 17, was charged with using a vehicle in the discharge of a weapon and with accessory to first-degree murder after the fact. He is considered a youthful offender but will be tried in adult court. Jones wept in the courtroom after he tried to speak about the incident but was cut off by the judge who said it wasn't the time to sort out the facts of the case. Jones faces anywhere from two years to life in prison if convicted on the counts he faces. The two younger teens face life in prison without parole if convicted on the murder charge. "I'm appalled," Hicks said after the hearing. "This is not supposed to happen in this community." In court, Hicks said Luna was sitting in the back seat of a car when he pulled the trigger on a .22 calibre revolver and shot Lane once in the back. Hicks said Jones was driving the vehicle and Edwards was in the passenger seat. The two younger boys were held without bail, while bail for Jones was set at $1 million. The mother of the murderer: "I know my son. He is a good kid," she said. Tech Support Pits From: Allen Re: Precise picture positioning in WORD Dear Webby, How can I position a picture with word at the precise place where I want it, intead of where WORD wants to put it? Thanks Allen Dear Allen That's a secret, as far as Microsoft is concerned,but it can be done quite easily. Click on the picture to make it active. Then click on the little doggie icon for Text Wrap. Select TIGHT. The picture will probably scoot off to somewhere else, where it is not suppoded to be, often on the next page. Click on it a couple of times and then you can drag it to where it belongs. It will probably change it's width and hight in the process, but now you can squish it to the exact size you want, andyou can even rotate it. The TIGHT text wrap setting will make the text flow around it and match the contours. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Use Cleaning Cloth And Water For Eyeglasses I called up my optical place where I bought my glasses. They have free cleaning cloths just for my glasses which are progressive lenses. I wash them often in warm water, squeeze it out, and lay it to dry. I do not put in the washer or dryer at all. This works for me and perhaps it will for you all as well. By Sarah Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at
"Information? I need the number of the Caseway Insurance Company." "Would you spell that, please?" "Certainly. C as in sea. A as in aye. S as in sea. E as in eye. W as in why. A as in are. Y as in you." "Just a minute, sir. I'll connect you with my supervisor."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
The minister's little six-year-old girl had been so naughty during the week, that her mother decided to give her the worst kind of punishment. She told her she couldn't go to the Sunday School Picnic on Saturday. When the day came, her mother felt she had been too harsh and changed her mind. When she told the little girl she could go to the picnic, the child's reaction was one of gloom and unhappiness. "What's the matter? I thought you'd be glad to go to the picnic." her mother said. "It's too late!" the little girl said. "I've already prayed for rain!"

» Fresh Water Fish

Today, Aug 22, in
1485 The War of the Roses ended with the death of England's 
 King Richard III. He was killed in the Battle of Bosworth 
 Field. His successor was Henry V II.
1567 The "Council of Blood" was established by the Duke of 
 Alba. This was the beginning of his reign of terror in the
1642 The English Civil War began when Charles I called 
 Parliament and its soldiers traitors.
1770 Australia was claimed under the British crown when 
 Captain James Cook landed there.
1775 The American colonies were proclaimed to be in a state 
 of open rebellion by England's King George III.
1846 The U.S. annexed New Mexico.
1851 The schooner America outraced the Aurora off the English 
 coast to win a trophy that became known as the America's Cup.
1865 A patent for liquid soap wwent to William Sheppard.
1902 In Hartford, CT, U.S. President Theodore Roosevelt 
 became first president of the United States to ride in a car
1906 The Victor Talking Machine Company of Camden, NJ began 
 to manufacture the Victrola. The hand-cranked unit, with 
 horn cabinet, sold for $200.
1910 Japan formally annexed Korea.
1911 It was announced that Leonardo da Vinci's "Mona Lisa" 
 had been stolen from the Louvre Museum in Paris. The 
 painting reappeared two years later in Italy.
1941 Nazi troops reached the outskirts of Leningrad during 
 World War II.
1951 75,052 people watched the Harlem Globetrotters perform. 
 It was the largest crowd to see a basketball game.
1959 Stephen Rockefeller married Anne Marie Rasmussen. Anne 
 had once been a maid for the powerful and wealthy 
 Rockefeller family.
1972 Due to its racial policies, Rhodesia was asked 
 to withdraw from the 20th Olympic Summer Games.
1984 The last Volkswagen Rabbit rolled off the assembly 
 line in New Stanton, PA.
1986 Kerr-McGee Corp. agreed to pay the estate of the 
 late Karen Silkwood $1.38 million to settle a 10-year-old
 nuclear contamination lawsuit.
1990 The U.S. State Department announced that the U.S. Embassy 
 in Kuwait would not be closed under President Saddam 
 Hussein's demand.
1990 Angry smokers blocked a street in Moscow to protest the 
 summer-long cigarette shortage.
1991 Mikhail S. Gorbachev returned to Moscow after the collapse 
 of the hard-liners' coup. On the same day he purged the men 
 that had tried to oust him.
1992 In Rostock, Germany, neo-Nazi violence broke out 
 against foreigners.
1996 U.S. President Clinton signed legislation that ended 
 guaranteed cash payments to the poor and demanded work from
2013  smiled

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