How to copy a screensaver to another machine: 

Good Morning,  !
Today is Tuesday, September 24.

Obama's friend Convicted Congressman Jesse Jackson Jr. (D-IL) 
is scheduled to receive $8,700 per month in government 
disability pay, as well as a partial federal pension 
of $45,000. That generous $8,700 in disability comes 
thanks to Jackson’s sudden development of a 
“mood disorder” as the federal government began 
looking to indict him. Jackson, who was sentenced 
to 2.5 years in prison, had no history of mental 
illness during his prior 17 years in Congress. 

Why would they just laugh at me, if I claimed a 
"mood disorder". even though I need the money
a few thousand times more urgently than him?

Have FUN!

If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

The greatest of faults, I should say, is to be conscious of none. --- Thomas Carlyle (1795 - 1881) Do what you feel in your heart to be right - for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't. --- Eleanor Roosevelt (1884 - 1962)
Two men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear. He soon found a huge bear, shot at it but only wounded it. The enraged bear charged toward him, he dropped his rifle and started running for the cabin as fast as he could. He ran pretty fast but the bear was just a little faster and gained on him with every step. Just as he reached the open cabin door, he tripped and fell flat. Too close behind to stop, the bear tripped over him and went rolling into the cabin. The man jumped up, closed the cabin door and yelled to his friend inside, "You skin this one while I go and get another!" ---------------- Actually, that's from Charlie Chaplin's "GoldRush", the only movie about Canada, that I had seen before immigrating in 1970.
A concerned husband went to the doctor to talk about his wife. He said to the doctor, "I think my wife is deaf because she never hears me the first time and always asks me to repeat things." "Well," the doctor replied, "go home tonight, stand about 15 feet from her, and say something. If she doesn't reply, move 5 feet closer and say it again. Keep doing this until we get an idea about the severity of her deafness." The husband went home and did exactly as the doctor had instructed. He started off 15 feet from his wife in the kitchen as she was chopping some vegetables. He said, "Honey, what's for dinner?" He heard no response. He moved 5 feet closer and asked again. No reply. He moved 5 feet closer. Still no reply. He finally got fed up and moved right behind her, about an inch away, and asked again, "Honey, what's for dinner?" She replied, "For the fourth time, vegetable stew! You better get a hearing aid, you deaf old fart!"
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A group of friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos for the day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering under the weight of an eight-point buck. "Where's Henry?" "Henry had a stroke of some kind. He's a couple of miles back up the trail." "You left Henry laying out there and carried the deer back!?!" "A tough call," nodded the hunter, "but I figured no one is going to steal Henry!"
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Adele Jones, 25, and Tommy Davis, 27, in Delray Beach, Floriduh Jailed for robbing mentally challenged man of video game Reported by The Weekly Vice A mentally challenged Florida man who had saved up for months to purchase a copy of "Grand Theft Auto V" was robbed of the video game as he left a GameStop store this week, police report. After buying the game Tuesday afternoon, Rohan Dawkins was approached in a Delray Beach parking lot by a couple who pulled up in a car. After asking Dawkins for the time, Tommy Davis, 27, grabbed the bag containing the best-selling game, which was released this week. When Dawkins sought to retrieve the item, Adele Jones, 25, allegedly kicked and punched the 21-year-old Dawkins, according to Delray Beach Police Department reports. After swiping the game, Davis and Jones (seen in the above mug shots) drove to a second GameStop, where they unsuccessfully sought to return the game for a refund. Investigators believe that the couple subsequently sold the game to a third party. A police report valued the stolen copy of "Grand Theft Auto V" at $150, an indication that Dawkins purchased a GameStop collector’s edition of the game. Aided by store surveillance footage, Davis and Jones-- parents to four children--were arrested yesterday. Dawkins identified both suspects when shown photo lineups. During questioning, an “apologetic” Davis reportedly confessed to robbing Dawkins, claiming that he “stole the items because he needed new tires for his car,” and as a black Obama voter, he felt they were entitled. Jones admitted that she and Davis went to GameStop intending to “catch a cracker,” which she said was slang for robbing a white person, cops reported. Instead, they robbed Dawkins, whom Davis said Adele Jones beat up until Davis was able to drive away. Davis and Jones were booked into the Palm Beach County jail on felony robbery and dealing in stolen property charges. They remain jailed in lieu of $5000 bond. “I wanted to play the game with my sister and my cousins,” Dawkins (seen below) said yesterday at a police press conference. “I was buying it for my family and me.” Police announced last night that today they will present Dawkins with a donated copy of "Grand Theft Auto V." Tech Support Pits From: Sharon Re: Screensavers Dear Webby, I want to thank you again for your daily fun. It really brightens my day. I have saved many of your tech questions & answers too. My question today has to do with screensavers. I have 2 PCs. One is not hooked to the internet. I mainly use it for an older card program & some older drawings I have saved. On this pc I have a screensaver titled "mystery". It is animated. But on the pc I use most it is not there. Is ther anyway to find either find the web site for that screensaver or I can send it to a disk? I really like it for Halloween time. Thanks again for your newsletter. Sharon Dear Sharon Just do a search for mystery.scr and then copy or mail that file to the other machine. Put it into the same folder where most of your .scr files are, and it should be easy to select that one. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Use Beer to Prevent Slugs To get rid of snails or slugs, place a glass or can in a hole so that the top is level with the ground, fill almost to the rim with beer and leave overnight. In the morning, dump the pests on the compost heap. By duckie-do from Cortez, CO Check out ThriftyFun's Blog
BRITISH EDUCATION AT ITS FINEST Following questions and answers were collated from last year's British GCSE exams(16 year olds)! Geography Q: Name the four seasons. A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar. Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink. A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists. Q: How is dew formed? A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire. Q: What is a planet? A: A body of earth surrounded by sky. Sociology Q: What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on? A: If you are buying a house, they will insist you are well endowed. Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections? A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election. Biology Q: What happens to your body as you age? A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental. Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty? A: He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery. Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes. A: Statistics. Q: What is artificial insemination? A: When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow. Q: How can you delay milk turning sour? A: Keep it in the cow. Q: What is the most common form of birth control? A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium. Q: Give the meaning of the term *Caesarean Section.- A: The caesarean section is the red light district in Rome. Q: What is a terminal illness? A: When you are sick at the airport Technology Q: What is a turbine? A: Something an Arab wears on his head. Religious Education Q: What is a Hindu? A: It lays eggs.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
One fine day, a bus driver went to the bus garage, started his bus, and drove off along the route. No problems for the first few stops. A few people got on, a few got off, and things went generally well. At the next stop, however, a big hulk of a guy got on. Six feet eight, built like a wrestler, arms hanging down to the ground. He glared at the driver and said, "Big John doesn't pay!" and sat down at the back. Did I mention that the driver was five three, thin, and basically meek? Naturally, he didn't argue with Big John, but he wasn't happy about it. The next day the same thing happened. Big John got on again, made a big show of refusing to pay, and sat down. And the next day, and the one after that, and so forth. This grated on the bus driver, who started losing sleep over the way Big John was taking advantage of him. Finally, he could stand it no longer. He signed up for body building courses, karate, judo, and all that good stuff. By the end of the summer, he had become quite strong; what's more, he felt really good about himself. So on the next Monday, when Big John once again got on the bus and said, "Big John doesn't pay!," The driver stood up, glared back at the passenger, and screamed "AND WHY NOT?!?!" With a surprised look on his face, Big John replied, "Big John has a bus pass."

» Crapper Mapper

Today, September 24, in
1869 Thousands of businessmen were financially ruined after 
 a panic on Wall Street. The panic was caused by an attempt 
 to corner the gold market by Jay Gould and James Fisk.
1929 The first all-instrument flight took place in New York 
 when Lt. James H. Doolittle guided a Consolidated NY2 
 Biplane over Mitchell Field.
1957 U.S. President Eisenhower sent federal troops to 
 Little Rock, AR, to enforce school integration.
1960 The first nuclear powered aircraft carrier was launched. 
 The USS Enterprise set out from Newport News, VA.
1995 Three decades of Israeli occupation of West Bank cities 
 ended with the signing of a pact by Israel and the PLO.
1996 The United States, represented by President Clinton, 
 and the world's other major nuclear powers signed a 
 Comprehensive Test Ban Treaty to end all testing and 
 development of nuclear weapons.
2001 U.S. President George W. Bush froze the assets of 
 27 suspected terrorists and terrorist groups.
2013  smiled

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