How to deal with excessive spam 

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Today is Wednesday, September 25.

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Treat all disasters as if they were trivialities but never treat a triviality as if it were a disaster. --- Quentin Crisp "The United States has no choice but to attack Syria because Dictator Bashar al-Assad is killing his own people with chemical weapons. Before, he was just killing them with bullets. But if America cared about shooting people, we'd be invading Chicago." --- Stephen Colbert "Syria's President Assad referred to President Obama as weak. Obama is so angry he plans to ask Congress for permission to come up with a good comeback." --- Conan O'Brien "I guess we're getting ready to attack Syria. But if we win, in the semifinals we face Iran." --- David Letterman "If President Obama really wants to hurt the Syrian government, donít send cruise missiles. He should send over some of his economic advisers." --- Jay Leno
>From Roland Student in Germany A Saudi prince went to Germany to study. A month later, he sent a letter to his dad saying, "Berlin is wonderful, the people are nice, and I really like it here, but I'm a bit ashamed to arrive to school with my gold Mercedes when all my teachers travel by train." Sometime later he received a letter from his dad with a ten million dollar check saying, "Stop embarrassing us. Go and get yourself a train too!"
An American tourist in Tel Aviv was about to enter the impressive Mann Auditorium to take in a concert by the Israel Philharmonic. He was admiring the unique architecture, the sweeping lines of the entrance, and the modern decor throughout the building. Finally he turned to his escort and asked if the building was named for Thomas Mann, the world-famous author. "No," his friend said, "it's named for Fredric Mann, from Philadelphia." "Really? I never heard of him. What did he write?" "A check."
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Bob, an experienced sky diver, was getting ready for a jump one day when he spotted another man outfitted to dive wearing dark glasses, carrying a white can and holding a seeing-eye dog by a leash. Shocked that the blind man was also going to jump, Bob struck up a conversation, expressing his admiration for the man's courage. Then, curious, he asked, "How do you know when the ground is getting close?" "Easy," replied the blind man. "The leash goes slack."
Click on the picture for the large version Yesterday morning at 07:30 from the Webby office
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Angela Martin, 29, Wallingford, CT. Registered Sex Offender jailed for Molesting Toddler, Emailing Video of it to Acquaintance Reported by The Weekly Vice Angela Martin, a 29-year-old Connecticut woman, has been jailed after she allegedly recorded herself molesting a 3-year-old girl. According to Wallingford Police, Martin molested a 3-year-old girl, recorded the abuse on her cell phone and then emailed a copy of the video to an acquaintance in California. Investigators say Martin, who is also known as Angela Haussmann, is a registered sex offender who was convicted of second-degree sexual assault of a minor in December 2006. The recorded abuse reportedly took place between August and September of this year, according to an arrest affidavit. Martin reportedly served 30 months in jail and was required to register as a sex offender after she was convicted in 2006. Martin's recent arrest was a result of a joint investigation conducted by Wallingford Police, the FBI and the Connecticut Child Exploitation Task Force. She was booked into jail and charged with producing, distributing and possessing child pornography. She remains held without bail pending a next court appearance. Apparently 30 months in jail were not enough to smarten her up. Tech Support Pits From: Malcolm Re: Too much spam Dear Webby, I can't keep up with my work because of all the spam I get. And no, I can't change the company email addresses. How good is that mailwasher that you keep mentioning? I want your honest opinion of it. Malcolm Dear Malcolm The reason I have the link for Mailwasher is because I highly recommend it. It reduces the 4500+ pieces of mail I get every day to the 200 that I need to see and answer. It washes the mail on the server, without wasting time to download more than the headers. It's easy to use and rock solid. Once every hour I hit F5 and it checks the mail. It downloads the headers and sorts and color codes the list. I glance over it to check for false positives, then hit F6. That causes it to dump the spam and open Eudora for downloading the legitimate mail. Unfortunately it does not have a feature for nuking the spammers, but other than that, it has everything a professinal grade spam control program should have. If the version of the Humor Letter that you are subscribed to doesn't have a button to get it, browse to Testdrive the free trial version, and if you like it, buy it a month later. I have recommended MailWasher for over a dozen years and have heard only good things about it. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Recycle Event Flowers Remember that flowers can be recycled, too! After an event, many a flower arrangement will end up in the trash! So rescue it, re-cut the flower stems and re-arrange the flowers at home. Why toss them when they still have life in them? With pruning and re-arranging the flowers can often last a week! And having fresh flowers is such a luxury, isn't it? By pamphyila from LA, CA Check out ThriftyFun's Blog
A man received a phone call one day, and the caller asked if he had lost a parrot. He said that he had indeed lost the bird, but wanted to know how the caller located him. The called said that the bird had landed on his balcony and kept repeating, "Hi, you have reached 555-1234. I can't come to the phone right now, please leave a message at the tone."
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Thanks to Bunny for this: There once was a woman who woke up one morning, looked in the mirror, and noticed she had only three hairs on her head. "Well," she said, "I think I'll braid my hair today." So she did and she had a wonderful day. The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and saw that she had only two hairs on her head. "H-m-m, " she said, "I think I'll part my hair down the middle today." So she did and she had a grand day. The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that she had only one hair on her head. "Well," she said, "Today I'm going to wear my hair in a pony tail." So she did and she had a fun, fun day. The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that there wasn't a single hair on her head. "YEAH!" she exclaimed, "I don't have to fix my hair today!" Attitude is everything.

Ľ Critters Galore

Today, September 25, in
1492 The crew of the Pinta, one of Christopher Columbus' 
 ships, mistakenly thought that they had spotted land.
1493 Christopher Columbus left Spain with 17 ships on his 
 second voyage to the Western Hemisphere.
1513 The Pacific Ocean was discovered by Spanish explorer 
 Vasco Nunez de Balboa when he crossed the Isthmus of Panama. 
 He named the body of water the South Sea. He was truly just 
 the first European to see the Pacific Ocean.
1789 The first U.S. Congress adopted 12 amendments to the 
 Constitution. Ten of the amendments became the Bill of Rights.
1847 During the Mexican-American War, U.S. forces led by 
 General Zachary Taylor captured Monterrey Mexico.
1890 The Sequoia National Park was established as a U.S. 
 National Park in Central California.
1890 Mormon President Wilford Woodruff issued a Manifesto 
 in which the practice of polygamy was renounced.
1956 A transatlantic telephone-cable system began 
 operation between Newfoundland and Scotland.
1957 300 U.S. Army troops stood guard as nine black students 
 were escorted to class at Central High School in Little 
 Rock, AR. The children had been forced to withdraw 2 days 
 earlier because of unruly white mobs.
1973 The three crewmen of Skylab II landed in the Pacific 
 Ocean after being on the U.S. space laboratory for 59 days.
1978 Melissa Ludtke, a writer for "Sports Illustrated", 
 filed a suit in U.S. District Court. The result was that 
 Major League Baseball could not bar female writers from 
 the locker room after the game.
1983 A Soviet military officer, Stanislav Petrov, averted 
 a potential worldwide nuclear war. He declared a false 
 alarm after a U.S. attack was detected by a Soviet early 
 warning system. It was later discovered the alarms had 
 been set off when the satellite warning system mistakenly 
 interpreted sunlight reflections off clouds as the 
 presence of enemy missiles.
1987 The booty collected from the Wydah, which sunk off 
 Cape Cod in 1717, was auctioned off. The worth was around 
 $400 million.
1990 The U.N. Security Council voted to impose an air 
 embargo against Iraq. Cuba was the only dissenting vote.
1991 The U.N. Security Council unanimously ordered a 
 worldwide arms embargo against Yugoslavia and all of 
 its warring factions.
1992 In Orlando, FL, a judge ruled in favor of 12-year-old 
 Gregory Kingsley. He had sought a divorce from his 
 biological parents.
1992 The Mars Observer blasted off on a mission that cost 
 $980 million. The probe has not been heard from since it 
 reached Mars in August of 1993.
1995 Ross Perot announced that he would form the 
 Independence Party.
2002 U.S. forces landed in Ivory Coast to aid in the rescue 
 foreigners trapped in a school by fighting between 
 government troops and rebel troops. Rebels had attempted 
 to take over the government on September 19.
2012 China launched its first aircraft carrier into service. 
2013  smiled

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