Why Open Office? 

Good Morning,  !

Today is Wednesday, October 30.
Thank you Jim for your special postcard!

From Judi (re snap.do)
Thank you.  I just used the link for the download to get 
rid of it and it seemed to have worked.  When I opened 
Chrome again it was gone.
You saved the day again.

Have FUN!

If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Associate with well-mannered persons and your manners will improve. Run around with decent folk and your own decent instincts will be strengthened. --- Stanley Walker
A man follows a woman out of a movie theatre. She has a dog on a leash. He stops her and says, "I'm sorry to bother you, but I couldn't help but notice that your dog was really into the movie. He cried at the right spots, he moved nervously in his seat at the boring parts, but most of all, he laughed like crazy at the funny parts. Did you find that unusual??" "Yes," she replied, "I found it very unusual ...because he hated the book!"
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Thanks to Bob for this story: My wife and I were watching some TV show the other nite where the wife hired a private detective to follow her husband to see if he were in fact "cheating" on her. I asked my wife if she would ever do that. She said, "Well not so much to find out who the other woman was, but to see if I could find out what she saw in you."
Click on the picture for the large version 2 ravens
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Courtney McPhillips, 26, Scranton, PA Jailed After Officers Find 35 Packets Of Heroin Stashed Inside Her Vagina Reported by The Weekly Vice Courtney McPhillips, a 26-year-old Pennsylvania woman, was jailed Thursday after she was allegedly caught with 35 packets of heroin stashed inside her vagina. According to Scranton Police, an investigation was launched after a police informant told detectives about a local drug ring, and identified McPhillips and a male friend for their involvement in the operation. The pair were under investigation when an officer stopped McPhillips' gold minivan after she failed to stop at a stop sign. Investigators say officers searched McPhillips' minivan and recovered 12 packets of heroin and several prescription pills from a plastic cigarette case located inside the vehicle. McPhillips and her passenger, 27-year-old James (Jimmy) Walsh, were found with fresh needle marks in their arms and slurred speech. As the search for drugs continued, McPhillips was found to have 35 glassine packets of heroin stuffed inside her vagina. During a police interview, McPhillips told detectives that Walsh handed her the drugs and told her to hide them when they noticed that a patrol car was behind them. Walsh admitted to owning the heroin that was found in the car, but stated that he never instructed McPhillips to take it or hide it. McPhillips was booked into jail and charged with possession with intent to deliver a controlled substance and possession of drug paraphernalia. Her bond was set at $25,000. Walsh was booked into jail and charged with delivery of a controlled substance and possession with intent to deliver. He was also taken into custody for violating his parole. He remains held in lieu of $50,000 bond. Tech Support Pits From: Marina Re: Why Open Office? Dear Webby, You mentioned Opne Office quite a bit, and I have seen it mentioned in many computer magazines, that are not too thick with Microsoft ads. What's the story about it? Marina Dear Marina If you had a company with 500 or 5000 employees, would you buy 500 or 5000 Microsoft Office licenses, or would you tell somebody to download Open Office, have them customize it for your company and let everybody copy that from the company site? The same applies to many Governments all over the world. Even though the very persuasive microsoft salespeople have fantastic incentives to offer, the current budget crunch makes it easy to resist them. Small town Governments usually fall for the incentives, that are for the buyer, who doesn't really give a hoot about the town budget, however larger towns tend to switch to Open Office or Office Libre. Office Libre (Free office) is similar, but gets updated more frequently. This is especially the case with countries, where the Government has switched to Linux. For reasons of reliability, 99.999% of web servers are using Linux, With Linux, instead of buying new machines with differenc copies of Windows to annoy the users, updates are just to the under-the-hood stuff, and the user interface never changes. That eliminates a lot of cussing and tech support demands. Open Office and Office Libre run just fine on Linux too, not just Windows. Since more and more of industry, commerce and governments have switched to Open Office, the workers of course get the same free programs for home too. Because a large part of Microsoft office is loaded during the Windows start-up, -that is why it takes so long-, opening a spreadsheet or document is fast, compared to using Open Office for that, but other than that small inconvenience, Open Office is a very popular alternative. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Cherry-Banana Cake Ingredients 1 1/2 cups sugar 1/2 cup vegetable shortening 1 tsp. vanilla 2 eggs 3/4 cup mashed bananas 2 cups sifted flour 2 1/2 tsp. baking powder 1/4 tsp. salt 1/2 cup maraschino cherries, chopped and well drained 1/4 cup milk Directions Cream the sugar and shortening until fluffy. Beat in the vanilla, eggs and bananas. Sift the dry ingredients, combine with the cherries, and add alternately with the milk, beating well after each addition. Bake in a 9x13 inch pan for about 45 minutes in a 350 degrees F oven. By Robin from Washington, IA Check out ThriftyFun's Blog
"So," the woman asked the detective she had hired,"did you trail my husband?" "Yes ma'am. I did. I followed him to a bar, to an out-of-the-way restaurant and then to an apartment." A big smile crossed the womans face, "Aha!! Then I've got him!" she said, boasting. "Is there any doubt what he was doing?" "No ma'am." replied the sleuth, "It's pretty clear that he was following you, and taking pictures for his web site!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
From today in 2006 (some of the characters in this have since died) Thanks to Paul for the minutes of the Democratic National Convention 7:00 P.M. Opening flag burning. 7:15 P.M. Pledge of allegiance to U.N. 7:30 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast 7:30 till 8:00 P.M. Nonreligious prayer and worship. Jessie Jackson and Al Sharpton. 8:00 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast. 8:05 P.M. Ceremonial tree hugging. 8:15- 8:30 P.M. Gay Wedding -- Barney Frank Presiding. 8:30 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast. 8:35 P.M. Free Saddam Rally. Cindy Sheehan -- Susan Sarandon. 9:00 P.M. Keynote speech. The proper etiquette for surrender--Jacques Chirac 9:15 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast. 9:20 P.M. Collection to benefit Osama Bin Laden kidney transplant fund 9:30 P.M. Unveiling of plan to free freedom fighters from Guantanamo Bay. Sean Penn 9:40 P.M. Why I hate the Military, A short talk by William Jefferson Clinton 9:45 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast 9:50 P.M. Dan Rather presents Truth in Broadcasting award, presented by Michael Moore 9:55 P.M., Ted Kennedy proposes a toast 10:00 P.M. How George Bush and Donald Rumsfeld brought down the World Trade Center Towers-- Howard Dean 10:30 P.M. Nomination of Hillary Rodham Clinton by Mahmud Ahnadinejad 11:00 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast 11:05 P.M. Al Gore reinvents Internet 11:15 P.M. Our Troops are War Criminals--John Kerry 11:30 P.M. Coronation Of Mrs. Hillary Rodham Clinton 12:00 A.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast 12:05 A.M. Bill asks Ted to drive Hillary home

Orca Pods

Today, Oct 30, in
1817 The independent government of Venezuela was established 
 by Simon Bolivar.
1831 Escaped slave Nat Turner was apprehended in Southampton 
 County, VA, several weeks after leading the bloodiest slave 
 uprising in American history.
1894 The time clock was patented by Daniel M. Cooper
1938 Orson Welles' "The War of the Worlds" aired on CBS 
 radio. The belief that the realistic radio dramatization 
 was a live news event about a Martian invasion caused 
 panic among listeners.
1945 The U.S. government announced the end of shoe 
1953 General George C. Marshall was awarded the Nobel 
 Peace Prize.
1961 The Soviet Union tested a hydrogen bomb with a 
 force of approximately 58 megatons.
1972 U.S. President Richard Nixon approved legislation 
 to increase Social Security spending by $5.3 billion.
1975 Prince Juan Carlos assumed power in Spain as 
 dictator Francisco Franco was near death.
1975 The New York Daily News ran the headline 
 "Ford to City: Drop Dead." The headline came a day 
 after U.S. President Gerald R. Ford said he would veto 
 any proposed federal bailout of New York City.
1984 In Poland, police found the body of kidnapped 
 pro-Solidarity priest Father Jerry Popieluszko. His death 
 was blamed on four security officers.
1989 Mitsubishi Estate Company announced it would buy 51 %
 of Rockefeller Group Inc. of New York.
1993 Martin Fettman, America's first veterinarian in space, 
 performed the world's first animal dissections in space, 
 while aboard the space shuttle Columbia.
1993 The United Nations deadline concerning ousted Haitian 
 President Jean-Bertrand Aristide passed with country's 
 military still in control.
1995 Federalist prevailed over separatists in Quebec in 
 a referendum concerning secession from the federation 
 of Canada.
1998 The terrorist who hijacked a Turkish Airlines plane 
 and the 39 people on board was killed when anti-terrorist 
 squads raided the plane.
2001 In New York City, U.S. President George W. Bush threw 
 out the first pitch at Game 3 of the World Series between 
 the New York Yankees and the Arizona Diamondbacks.
2013  smiled

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