Why use a tripod? 

Good Morning,  !
Today is Friday, December 27.
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!

Today's International Bonehead Award goes to a 27 year old who got jailed for "Knockout Game" Attack On 79-Year-Old Victim Details at International Bonehead Awards
Have FUN! DearWebby
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You and I do not see things as they are. We see things as we are. --- Herb Cohen
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Ole was terribly overweight, so his doctor put him on a diet. The doctor said, "I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day and repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you should have lost at least five pounds." When Ole returned, he shocked the doctor by having lost nearly 60 pounds. "Why, that's amazing!" the doctor said. "Did you follow my instructions?" Ole nodded, "Ya, but I tell you, I taut I vud drop dead dat tird day!" "From hunger?" asked the doctor. "No, da hunger vas one ting, but vat really got to me was all dat skippin!'"
Ester's husband dies and she has only $20,000 to her name. After everything is done at the funeral home and cemetery, she tells her closest friend that she has no money left. The friend says, "How can that be? You told me you still had $20,000 left just a few days before Cohen died. How could you be broke?" The widow says, "Well, the funeral home cost me $5,000. And of course, I had to make the obligatory donation to the temple, so that was another $5,000. The rest went for the memorial stone." The friend says, "$10,000 for the memorial stone? My goodness, how big was it?" Extending her left hand, the widow says, "Three carats."
Thanks to Lillemor for this: Click on the picture for the large version Swedish Sledding
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Conrad Alvin Barrett, 27, Houston, Texas a 27 year old who got jailed for "Knockout Game" Attack on 79-Year-Old Victim he Texas man charged with a federal hate crime for an alleged “knockout game” attack on a 79-year-old black victim was identified by police after he showed video of the assault to a stranger in a restaurant--a man who turned out to be an off-duty arson investigator who immediately flagged down a cop to report the brutal crime. A federal criminal complaint accuses Conrad Alvin Barrett, 27, of punching the elderly man in the head on November 24 (the blow left the victim with two jaw fractures and cost him three teeth). The man underwent surgery “to insert two metal plates in his jaw,” and spent several days in the hospital, according to an affidavit sworn by FBI Agent Alfred Tribble. Barrett, whose rap sheet includes prior convictions for burglary and drunk driving, is pictured in the above mug shot. Barrett’s phone, which was seized by police after the tip from the arson investigator, contained several incriminating videos, including a clip showing him approaching an “elderly African American man” and asking, “How’s it going, man?” As he gets closer to the victim, “a loud smack is heard, and the victim falls to the ground,” reported Tribble, who added, “Barrett laughs, says 'knockout,' and then flees in his vehicle.” Other videos on Barrett’s phone appear to show him plotting a “knockout” attack. “The plan is to see if I were to hit a black person, would this be nationally televised?” he comments in one clip. “In other videos, Barrett uses the word ‘nigger’ and states that African Americans ‘haven’t fully experienced the blessings of evolution,’” according to Agent Tribble. Another video shows Barrett driving around a mall parking lot, saying that he was trying to work up the “courage” to play the “knockout game.” At one point, Barrett remarks that he had “found the perfect African American suspect,” but he then apparently changes his mind about attacking the target. If convicted of the felony charge, Barrett faces a maximum of 10 years in prison and a $250,000 fine. He is scheduled to make an initial appearance today in U.S. District Court in Houston. Tech Support Pits From: Andree Re: Why not use the flash with modern cameras? Dear Webby, on modern cameras the built in flash works automatically, whenever it is needed. So why all this fuss about external slave flashes and tripods and whatnot? Andree Dear Andree Have you ever been on a small airplane and watched the shadow of the airplane on the ground? Did you notice that for a fairly large area around the shadow of the airplane, the trees had no shadows, and no contrast, and looked like flat and squashed grass bushels? A camera flash does exactly the same. No side light, no shadows and no contrast. Faces in the center have the "Deer in the headlights" appearance. That is why the better photographers have ever since the days of the Magnesium flash pans a couple hundred years ago held the flash as far off to the side and up as they could reach. With cameras, that have reasonably large lenses to let in more light, you can turn off or tape down the flash, and force them to re-calculate and make due with ambient light. As long as you are aware of where that ambient light is coming from, you can often get away without further help. However, if you want to take pictures of people in a darkish room, for example by the light of a Christmas tree, or candellight, then you will see that the camera lengthens the exposure time quite rudely. Most people can hold still a few seconda, but if you shake the camera the tiniest bit, the pictrue will be fuzzy. That is why you need a tripod or sand baggie to totally avoid ANY camera shake in dim lighting. The same also goes for long zoom shots. Take your longest fishing rod and use it to turn a light switch off and on. Did you realize what kind of jittery fumbler you are? Now imagine, that your fishing rod was a few miles long, and how wildly you would be jittering there. You could not paint a deer or even an elephant on the other side of the valley. To get sharp pictures with long zoom shots it is a good idea to use a tripod or small sand baggie. An old, well worn leather purse, that is no longer slippery, and filled with sand or sugar, makes a great camera cushion. You can nestle the camera into it until it points just right, set the self timer to 3 or 5 seconds, clcick it and stand back. THAT is what those short self timer settings are for, not for sprinting around and into the pictrue. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Save Food Scraps for Chickens If you know anyone that has chickens, save ALL your scraps, peelings, and fruit skins and give them to the chicken's owner. This keeps my garbage disposal and septic clean and the chickens have fruits and vegetables year round. Everyone is a winner! By The Red Head from Bozeman, MT Check out ThriftyFun's Blog
The girl said to Grandpa, "I noticed that when you sneeze, you put your hand in front of your mouth." "Of course," explained Grandpa. "How else can I catch my teeth???"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.

At a wedding rehearsal, the minister told the father of the bride, "As you give your daughter's hand to the bridegroom, you should say something nice to him." The father, a grocery-store manager, took the advice. During the wedding ceremony, he placed the bride's hand on his son-in-law's arm and said, "No deposit, no return."
A pretty young woman visiting her new doctor for the first time found herself alone in a small waiting room. She began undressing nervously, preparing herself for the upcoming examination. Just as she draped the last of her garments over the back of a chair, a light rap sounded on the door and a young doctor strode in. Coming to an abrupt halt, the doctor looked his nude patient up and down carefully and appreciatively. "Miss Jones," he said finally, "it seems quite obvious to me that until today you have never had an eye examination."

» Longest wooden sculpture
Wishing you
a Cool Yule
Frantic Foist!
from Dianne!

Today, December 27, in
1831 Charles Darwin set out on a voyage to the Pacific 
 aboard the HMS Beagle. Darwin's discoveries during the voyage 
 helped him form the basis of his theories on evolution.
1845 Dr. Crawford Williamson Long used anesthesia for childbirth 
 for the first time. The event was the delivery of his own child 
 in Jefferson, GA.
1900 Carrie Nation staged her first raid on a saloon at the 
 Carey Hotel in Wichita, KS. She broke each and every one of 
 the liquor bottles that could be seen.
1927 Leon Trotsky was expelled from the Communist Party.
1938 The first skimobile course in America opened in North 
 Conway, NH.
1945 The World Bank was created with an agreement signed 
 by 28 nations.
1947 The children's television program "Howdy Doody," hosted 
 by Bob Smith, made its debut on NBC.
1949 Queen Juliana of the Netherlands granted sovereignty to 
 Indonesia after more than 300 years of Dutch rule.
1951 In Cincinnati, OH, a Crosley automobile, with a steering 
 wheel on the right side, became the first vehicle of its 
 kind to be placed in service for mail delivery.
1965 The BP oil rig Sea Gem capsized in the North Sea, with 
 the loss of 13 lives.
1978 Spain adopted a new constitution and became a democracy 
 after 40 years of dictatorship. 
1979 Soviet forces seized control of Afghanistan. Babrak 
 Karmal succeeded President Hafizullah Amin, who was 
 overthrown and executed.
1985 Palestinian guerrillas opened fire inside the Rome and 
 Vienna airports. A total of twenty people were killed, 
 including five of the attackers, who were killed by police 
 and security personnel.
1992 The U.S. shot down an Iraqi fighter jet during what the 
 Pentagon described as a confrontation between a pair of Iraqi 
 warplanes and U.S. F-16 jets in U.N.-restricted airspace 
 over southern Iraq.
1996 Muslim fundamentalist Taliban forces retook the strategic 
 air base of Bagram, solidifying their buffer zone around 
 Kabul, the Afghanistan capital.
2000 Mario Lemeiux (Pittsburgh Penguins) returned to the 
 National Hockey League (NHL) as a player after over 3 years 
 of retirement. He was the first owner-player in the modern 
 era of pro sports. Lemieux had purchased the Pittsburgh 
 Penguins during his retirement from playing.
2001 U.S. President George W. Bush granted China permanent 
 normal trade status with the United States.
2002 North Korea ordered U.N. nuclear inspectors to leave the 
 country and said that it would restart a laboratory capable 
 of producing plutonium for nuclear weapons.
2002 Clonaid announced the birth of the first cloned human baby. 
 The baby had been born December 26.
2013  smiled.

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