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Today is Tuesday, May 6.



Have FUN!
DearWebby


Today's International Bonehead Award goes to Boston gang member sinks self with Twitter gun pix Details at International Bonehead Awards From the History section at the bottom: Today, in 1937 The German airship Hindenburg crashed and burned in Lakehurst, NJ. Thirty-six people (of the 97 on board) were killed.
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They always talk who never think. --- Matthew Prior (1664 - 1721)
Vipre Security 2014 for the whole family! (Opens in a new tab, you don't lose this page)
>From Nanarina Why Jewish daughters need therapy!!! JewishMother: "Hello?" Daughter: "Hi Mom. Can I leave the kids with you tonight?" JewishMother: "You're going out?" Daughter: "Yes." JewishMother: "With whom?" Daughter: "With a friend." JewishMother: "I don't know why you left your husband. He is such a good man." Daughter: "I didn't leave him. He left me! " JewishMother: "You let him leave you, and now you go out with anybodies and nobodies." Daughter: "I do not go out with anybody. Can I bring over the kids? " JewishMother: "I never left you to go out with anybody except your father." Daughter: "There are lots of things that you did, and I don't." JewishMother: "What are you hinting at? " Daughter: "Nothing, I just want to know if I can bring the kids over tonight." JewishMother: "You're going to stay the night with him? What will yourhusband say if he finds out?" Daughter: "My EX husband. I don't think he would be bothered. From the day he leftme, he probably never slept alone!" JewishMother: "So you're going to sleep over at this loser's place?" Daughter:"He's not a loser." JewishMother: "A man who goes out with a divorced woman with children is a loserand a parasite." Daughter:"I don't want to argue. Should I bring over the kids or not? " JewishMother: "Poor children with such a mother." Daughter:"Such a what?" JewishMother: "With no stability. No wonder your husband left you." Daughter:"ENOUGH!!! " JewishMother "Don't scream at me. You probably scream at this loser too!" Daughter:"Now you're worried about the loser? " JewishMother: "Ah, so you see he's a loser. I spotted him immediately." Daughter:"Goodbye, mother." JewishMother: "Wait! Don't hang up! When are you bringing them over? Daughter:"I'm not bringing them over! I'm not going out!" JewishMother: "If you never go out, how do you expect to meet anyone?"
An annoyingly self-righteous man went to the doctor for a check-up. He said, "I feel terrible. Please examine me and tell me what's wrong with me." "Let's begin with a few questions," said the doctor, "Do you drink much?" "Alcohol?" said the man. "I'm a teetotaler. Never touch a drop." "How about smoking?" asked the doctor. "Never," replied the man. "Tobacco is bad, and I have strong principles against it." "Well, uh." asked the doctor, "do you have much of a sex life?" "Oh, no," said the man. "Sex is sin. I'm in bed by 10:30 every night and I always have been." The doctor paused, looked at the man hard, and asked, "Well, do you have pains in your head?" "Yes," said the man. "I have terrible pains in my head." "O.K.," said the doctor. "That's your trouble. Your halo is on too tight!!
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Kwmaine Davis, 23, Boston, MA Gang Member Sinks Self With Twitter Gun Pix Kwmaine Davis has 328 Twitter followers. Unfortunately for the 23-year-old Davis, that number includes Officer Brian Delahanty of the Boston Police Department. As part of his duties with the BPD’s Youth Violence Strike Force, Delahanty has been surreptitiously following Davis on Twitter, since the convicted felon is associated with H-Bloc, a gang operating from Boston’s Roxbury neighborhood. H-Bloc members are known to dress in silver and black clothing emblazoned with the Oakland Raiders logo. Along with offers to sell pot and photos of some favorite meals, Davis’s Twitter feed includes such observations as “If tha pussy don't sound like mac n cheese when you hitting it…it ain't that grease” and “Bitches love sucking dick drunk I'll tell ya.” Davis, who uses the handle “DopeMan,” can be found on Twitter at @superfreakmaino. Those messages, however, were not of interest to Delahanty. Instead, the cop alerted to a pair of recent Davis tweets that included photos showing him posing with a Smith & Wesson .44 caliber handgun and a Sig Sauer .380 caliber pistol. The photos were taken on consecutive days in February at a firing range in Salisbury, a town 45 miles north of Boston. Davis is pictured above holding the Smith & Wesson, which was outfitted with an optical scope. He is seen at left holding two other guns at the Salisbury range. Since Davis is a felon--he was convicted of illegal weapons and ammo possession in 2009--he is not allowed to possess a firearm (even one rented from a firing range). Alarmed that a gang member appeared to be trying to improve his marksmanship, Boston police contacted the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives. A subsequent ATF probe resulted in the filing of a felony complaint charging Davis with being a felon in possession of a firearm. Davis was arrested Wednesday by federal agents and remains in custody in advance of a May 9 detention hearing in U.S. District Court in Boston. In an affidavit filed today, a Boston detective cited Davis’s affiliation with the H-Bloc gang as reason for a federal magistrate to deny him bail. Davis’s trip to the firing range, the cop noted, was “intended to increase his firearm proficiency for illegal purposes rather than for any sporting or recreational reason.” Tech Support Pits From: Frank Re: Gmail wants cookies Dear Webby A friend who is older than you and I just called to tell me she switched from IE to Firefox and can no longer download her gmail. She keeps getting a message that tells her to enable cookies (I believe on Google Chrome). Base on your recommendations I use Firefox and Eudora and do not have any knowledge of gmail or how to advise her. Would you please in very, very simple terms that I can relate to her how to configure Firefox to permit her to receive her gmail? FYI, Ark City was 100 both yesterday and today, no rain. To early for this heat . Wichita 102 on Sunday. Thank you for the help Frank Dear Frank Here it is 33 degrees in your quaint British Loyalist units. +1 C in metric But the snow is slowly melting. How to enable FireFox Cookies: http://webby.com/FFcookies Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Keeping Those Buttons On When my twin boys were in grade school, one of them always came home from school missing a button. It was very frustrating, but they were very good at keeping the button and bring it home. Then it hit me! They couldn't resist pulling that little lead thread to see the button come off really quick. But I fixed them good, I dropped a very small dab of nail glue on the reverse side of the button, where it is sewn through the fabric. It worked perfectly. Be very careful not to drip on other areas of the garment, I protected it with paper towels. Even those little boys thought that was a great idea, and I'm am still tempted to do it now, even though they are 22 years old. ;) By NinaL Check out ThriftyFun's Blog
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.

A kindergartner brings his drawings home every day. His mother is delighted to see what he's doing, of course, and hangs each one on the refrigerator. But after a while, one thing starts bothering her. The child uses only blacks and browns for his drawings. Fearing a problem and not wanting it to get worse, she decides to take him to a child psychologist. The psychologist delicately goes to work. Every day, for two weeks, he gives the boy a battery of tests, but everything seems perfectly normal. Yet every day the little fellow continues to bring home drawings in only blacks and browns. Frustrated at not being able to get to the root of the problem, the psychologist decides to give the boy some paper and a box of crayons and observe what happens. The boy opens the box of crayons and says, "Oh, wow! A new box of crayons! At school we only have old boxes, and the only ones left in mine are black and brown."
The patient demanded, "Doc, I just must have a liver transplant, a kidney transplant, a cornea transplant, a lung transplant, and a heart transplant." "WHAT?" yelled the doctor. "Tell me, exactly why you think you need all these transplants." "Well," explained the patient, "my boss told me that I needed to get reorganized."

» Snazzy Science

Today in 
1527 German troops began sacking Rome, bringing about the 
 end of the Renaissance.
1529 Babur defeated the Afghan Chiefs in the Battle of 
 Ghagra, India.
1682 King Louis XIV moved his court to Versailles, France.
1851 The mechanical refrigerator was patented by 
 Dr. John Gorrie.
1851 Linus Yale patented the clock-type lock.
1877 Chief Crazy Horse surrendered to U.S. troops in Nebraska.
1882 The U.S. Congress passed the Chinese Exclusion Act. The 
 act barred Chinese immigrants from the U.S. for 10 years.
1889 The Universal Exposition opened in Paris, France, 
 marking the dedication of the Eiffel Tower. Also at the 
 exposition was the first automobile in Paris, 
 the Mercedes-Benz.
1910 Kind Edward VII of England died. He was succeeded by 
 his second son, George V.
1937 The German airship Hindenburg crashed and burned in 
 Lakehurst, NJ. Thirty-six people (of the 97 on board) 
 were killed.
1941 Joseph Stalin assumed the Soviet premiership.
1942 During World War II, the Japanese seized control of 
 the Philippines. About 15,000 Americans and Filipinos on 
 Corregidor surrendered to the Japanese.
1945 Axis Sally made her final propaganda broadcast to 
 Allied troops.
1957 U.S. Senator John Fitzgerald Kennedy was awarded the 
 Pulitzer Prize for his book "Profiles in Courage".
1959 The Pablo Picasso painting of a Dutch girl was sold 
 for $154,000 in London. It was the highest price paid 
 (at the time) for a painting by a living artist.
1960 Britain's Princess Margaret married Anthony Armstrong 
 Jones. They were divorced in 1978.
1960 U.S. President Eisenhower signed the Civil Rights Act
 of 1960.
1962 The first nuclear warhead was fired from the Polaris 
 submarine.
1994 The Chunnel officially opened. The tunnel under the 
 English Channel links England and France.
1994 Former Arkansas state worker Paula Jones filed suit 
 against U.S. President Clinton. The case alleged that he 
 had sexually harassed her in 1991.
1997 Army Staff Sgt. Delmar G. Simpson was sentenced to 
 25 years in prison for raping six trainees at Aberdeen 
 Proving Ground in Maryland.
1997 Four health-care companies agreed to a settlement of 
 $600 million to hemophiliacs who had contracted AIDS from 
 tainted blood between 1978-1985.
1999 A parole board in New York voted to release Amy Fisher. 
 She had been in jail for 7 years for shooting her lover's 
 wife, Mary Jo Buttafuoco, in the face.
2001 Chandra Levy's parents reported her missing to police 
 in Washington, DC. Levy's body was found on May 22, 2002 
 in Rock Creek Park.
2002 "Spider-Man" became the first movie to make more than 
 $100 million in its first weekend.
2014  smiled.


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