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Good Morning,  !

Today is Tuesday, July 15
By the time you read this, I will be in Calgary on an
operating table for the cataract operation on my left eye.

Have FUN!
DearWebby


Today's International Bonehead Award goes to a Texas couple who kept son locked away for years Details at Boneheads From the History section at the bottom: Today, in 1965 The spacecraft Mariner IV sent back the first close-up pictures of the planet Mars.
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In the United States there is more space where nobody is than where anybody is. That is what makes America what it is. --- Gertrude Stein (1874 - 1946) "Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds." --- Albert Einstein
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Father Norton woke up Sunday morning and realizing it was an exceptionally beautiful and sunny early spring day, decided he just had to play golf. So... he told the Associate Pastor that he was feeling sick and persuaded him to say Mass for him that day. As soon as the Associate Pastor left the room, Father Norton headed out of town to a golf course about forty miles away. This way he knew he wouldn't accidentally meet anyone he knew from his parish. Setting up on the first tee, he was alone. After all, it was Sunday morning and everyone else was in church! At about this time, Saint Peter leaned over to the Lord while looking down from the heavens and exclaimed, "You're not going to let him get away with this, are you?" The Lord sighed, and said, "No, I guess not." Just then Father Norton hit the ball and it shot straight towards the pin, dropping just short of it, rolled up and fell into the hole. It WAS A 420 YARD HOLE IN ONE! St. Peter was astonished. He looked at the Lord and asked, "Why did you let him do that?" The Lord smiled and replied, "Who's he going to brag to?"
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Thanks to Dave for this story: A fellow computer programmer for a consulting group had designed some software for one of our largest accounts. He asked my help in putting it into operation. At first, he handled most of the work. Eventually, though, he asked me to help with the last phase of the training. When I sat down with one woman and told her I would be showing her how to make changes to the files, she sighed with relief. "I'm so glad you're teaching me instead of him." Surprised, I said that my colleague was far more experienced than I was. "Yes," she said, "but I feel much more comfortable with you. I get nervous around smart people."
Click on the picture for the large version Hubble shot towards "Hand Of God"
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Jenifer Elise Thyssen, 40, and Dane Andrew Thyssen, 39 DRIPPING SPRINGS, Texas Texas couple kept son locked away for years A man arrested for burglary in a Central Texas town told police he had been held captive for at least four years by his adoptive parents in a garage apartment locked on the outside, authorities said. Jenifer Elise Thyssen, 40, and Dane Andrew Thyssen, 39, were being held Friday at the Hays County jail. They were arrested Wednesday on kidnapping charges. Hays County sheriff's deputies say the couple told them they confined 22-year-old Koystya Thyssen in an apartment at their home in Dripping Springs "for the safety" of their other children, according to the arrest affidavit. Court documents don't indicate how many children were in the couple's care. Authorities began to investigate the case after Koystya Thyssen was arrested for burglarizing a neighbor's home after using a screwdriver to escape the apartment. Sheriff's deputies said the apartment had a toilet, sink and microwave, and that Koystya Thyssen told them his adoptive parents gave him a box of dry and frozen foods once a week. He said he was allowed to leave once a week to see a counselor, but was otherwise confined to the apartment. "Koystya stated he believes it's wrong how he is treated but doesn't say anything," the affidavit says. "Koystya advised he had no friends nor any family in the United States." The affidavit does not indicate where he is originally from. Dripping Springs, a town of around 1,900 residents, is about 20 miles west of Austin. Jenifer and Dane Thyssen each were being held on $350,000 bond. Koystya Thyssen was being held at the county jail Friday on a burglary of a habitation charge. His bond was set at $10,000. No attorney was listed for him. Tech Support Pits From: Tam Re: Calendar maker Dear Webby, thanks for the humor letter, lovin it everyday, I was wondering if you know of anyplace online that I can print calenders..monthy ones. thanks Tam Dear Tam I just use a spreadsheet to make calendars whenever I neend some, but you can go to http://www.myfreecalendarmaker.com/ and generate and print them right off their site. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Removing Odors From the Microwave Lots of food smells linger in the microwave for a long time. To combat those odors and leave your microwave smelling fresh, use lemon essential oil. Just put a cup of water into a microwave-safe glass container and add 4 drops of lemon oil. Microwave the bowl on high for 2 minutes; keep the microwave door closed until the water is cooled a little, about 10 minutes. By JodiT from Aurora, CO Check out ThriftyFun's Blog
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No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.

Thanks to Sandie for this story: At the banquet of their 25th wedding anniversary, Tom was asked to give his friends a brief account of the benefits of a marriage of such a long duration. "Tell us Tom, just what is it you have learned from all those wonderful years with your wife"? Tom responded, "Well, I've learned that marriage is the best teacher of all. It teaches you loyalty, forbearance, meekness, self-restraint, forgiveness and a great many other qualities you wouldn't have needed if you'd stayed single!"
A flight attendant on a cross-country flight nervously announced about 30 minutes outbound from LA, "I don't know how this happened, but we have 103 passengers aboard and only 40 dinners." When the passengers' muttering had died down, she continued, "Anyone who is kind enough to give up his meal so someone else can eat, will receive free drinks for the length of the flight." Her next announcement came an hour later. "If anyone wants to change his mind, we still have 29 dinners available!"

» Provoking Sculptures

Today in 
1099 Jerusalem fell to the Crusaders.
1410 Poles and Lithuanians defeated the Teutonic knights 
 at Tannenburg, Prussia.
1789 The electors of Paris set up a "Commune" to live without 
 the authority of the government.
1806 Lieutenant Zebulon Pike began his western expedition from 
 Fort Belle Fountaine, near St. Louis, MO.
1813 Napoleon Bonaparte's representatives met with the Allies 
 in Prague to discuss peace terms.
1834 Lord Napier of England arrived in Macao, China as the first 
 chief superintendent of trade.
1885 In New York, the Niagara Reservation State Park opened.
1888 "Printers’ Ink" was first sold.
1901 Over 74,000 Pittsburgh steel workers went on strike.
1904 The first Buddhist temple in the U.S. was established in 
 Los Angeles, CA.
1916 In Seattle, WA, Pacific Aero Products was incorporated 
 by William Boeing. The company was later renamed Boeing Co.
1918 The Second Battle of the Marne began during World War I.
1922 The duck-billed platypus arrived in America, direct from 
 Australia. It was exhibited at the Bronx Zoo in New York City.
1942 The first supply flight from India to China over the 'Hump' 
 was carried to help China's war effort.
1958 Five thousand U.S. Marines landed in Beirut, Lebanon, to 
 protect the pro-Western government. The troops withdrew 
 October 25, 1958.
1965 The spacecraft Mariner IV sent back the first close-up 
 pictures of the planet Mars.
1968 Commercial air travel began between the U.S. and the 
 U.S.S.R., when the first plane, a Soviet Aeroflot jet, 
 landed at Kennedy International Airport in New York.
1987 Taiwan ended thirty-seven years of martial law.
2009 "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince" was released 
 in theaters in the U.S. It was the sixth movie in the series. 
2014  smiled.


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