Autoresponders pro/con 

Good Morning,  !

Today is Tuesday, July 22.

Have FUN!

Today's International Bonehead Award goes to an Illinois Bimbo, who posted a selfie of her wearing a shoplifted dress on FB Details at Boneheads From the History section at the bottom: Today, in 1926 Babe Ruth caught a baseball at Mitchell Field in New York. The ball had been dropped from an airplane flying at 250 feet.
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No one can earn a million dollars honestly. --- William Jennings Bryan (1860 - 1925) The only correct actions are those that demand no explanation and no apology. --- Red Auerbach
Vipre Security 2014 for the whole family! (Opens in a new tab, so that you don't lose this page)
>From Honey Married 52 years, I took a look at my wife Julie yesterday and said, "Honey, 52 years ago, we had a cheap apartment, a cheap car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10 inch black and white TV, but I go to sleep every night with a hot 25 year old chick. Now, we have a nice house, nice car, big bed and plasma screen TV, but I'm sleeping with a 70+ year old woman. It seems to me that you are not holding up your side of things." Now Julie is a very reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find a hot 25 year old chick, and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap apartment, driving a cheap car, sleeping on a sofa bed.
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While out one morning in the park, a jogger found a brand new tennis ball, and seeing nobody around it might belong to, he slipped it into the pocket of his shorts. Later, on his way home, he stopped at a pedestrian crossing, waiting for the lights to change. A girl standing next to him eyed the large bulge in his shorts. "What's that?" she asked. "Tennis ball," came the breathless reply. "Oh," said the girl sympathetically, "that must be painful, I had tennis elbow once."
Thanks to Dianne for this picture Click on the picture for the large version
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Danielle Saxton, 27, West Frankfort, Illinois Illinois Bimbo, who posted a selfie of her wearing a shoplifted dress on FB Police investigating the theft of clothing and jewelry from a southern Illinois boutique say they arrested a woman after she posted Facebook photos of herself wearing one of the stolen items. WSIL-TV reports that police arrested 27-year-old Danielle Saxton, of West Frankfort, earlier this month on misdemeanor retail theft charges. She's free on her own recognizance. Authorities say a distinctive leopard-print dress was among the items stolen July 11 from Mortie's Boutique in West Frankfort. The store's co-owner, Kert Williams, says he posted about the stolen items on Facebook and that people who saw Williams' posting and those of Saxton made the connection and helped police. Tech Support Pits From: Alice Re: Auto responder Dear Webby While looking for a certain picture that you had one day, I came across your diatribe against autroresponders. At first I was miffed at your reply, that sounded like you had preached the same thing too many times. Pardon me for not having been subscribed as long as others. Then I phoned my daughter, hoping she had a different explanation. Well, golly, she didn't. And she had me blacklisted! Not on purpose, but as you said, anything that smells like an auto- responder gets dumped and the sender blacklisted. Now I dumped my autoresponder, and the stupid book that recommended it. Thanks Alice Dear Alice Good for you! Autoresponders are only justified when they deliver requested information, like for example a price list, or weather update, or event schedule, or even race results when somebody sends a blank email to a certain address. Other than that, it's best to avoid them like the plague. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Fruit Fly Trap I absolutely hate fruit flies! This trap is very easy to make and works really well. I always have this trap set up on the counter, so an infestation never has a chance to take hold. :) Approximate Time: 5 minutes Supplies: red wine vinegar Dawn dish soap plastic wrap rubber band toothpick clear jar Steps: Put 3-4 drops of Dawn soap into the bottom of the jar. Pour 6 Tbsp. of red wine vinegar into the jar (or enough to fill it about 1/4 in.). Gently swirl the jar around to combine the ingredients. Place a piece of plastic wrap over the jar and pull it tight across the top. Secure it with a rubber band. Trim off any excess plastic. Using a toothpick, poke holes into the plastic so the flies can get in. Place your trap near any fruit you have out on the counter. Goodbye fruit flies! NOTE: I change out my mixture about every 2 weeks, more often if I am catching a lot of fruit flies. By lalala... [465] Check out ThriftyFun's Blog
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No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.

A couple just started their Lamaze class and they were given an activity requiring the husband to wear a bag of sand - to give him an idea of what it feels like to be pregnant. The husband stood up and shrugged saying, "This doesn't feel so bad." The instructor then dropped a pen and asked the husband to pick it up. "You want me to pick up the pen as if I were pregnant, the way my wife would do it?" the husband asked. "Exactly," replied the instructor. To the delight of the other husbands, he turned to his wife and said, "Honey, pick up that pen for me."
From Sandie: Phone companies charge up to $1.35 for"411 Information" calls, but you really don't have to pay that. When you need to use the 411 Information option, simply dial 1-800-FREE-411 or 1 800 373 3411 and you will not be charge for it. Works on home phones and on cell phones as well Sandie

» She Sells Seashells by the Seashore

Today in 
1376 The legend of the Pied Piper of Hamelin leading rats 
 out of town is said to have occurred on this date.
1587 A second English colony was established on Roanoke 
 Island off North Carolina. The colony vanished under 
 mysterious circumstances.
1796 Cleveland was founded by General Moses Cleaveland.
1798 The USS Constitution was underway and out to sea for 
 the first time since being launched on October 21, 1797.
1812 English troops under the Duke of Wellington defeated 
 the French at the Battle of Salamanca in Spain.
1926 Babe Ruth caught a baseball at Mitchell Field in 
 New York. The ball had been dropped from an airplane 
 flying at 250 feet.
1933 Wiley Post ended his around-the-world flight. He 
 had traveled 15,596 miles in 7 days, 18 hours and 45 min.
1943 American forces led by General George S. Patton 
 captured Palermo, Sicily.
1941 Plans for the Pentagon were presented to the House 
 Subcommittee on Appropriations.
1975 Confederate General Robert E. Lee had his U.S. 
 citizenship restored by the U.S. Congress.
1987 The U.S. began its policy of escorting re-flagged 
 Kuwaiti tankers up and down the Persian Gulf to protect them 
 from possible attack by Iran.
1998 Iran tested medium-range missile, capable of reaching 
 Israel or Saudi Arabia.
2000 Astronomers at the University of Arizona announced that 
 they had found a 17th moon orbiting Jupiter.
2003 In northern Iraq, Saddam Hussein's sons Odai and Qusai 
 died after a gunfight with U.S. forces.
2003 In Paris, France, a fire broke out near the top of the 
 Eiffel Tower. About 4,000 visitors were evacuated and no 
 injuries were reported.
2009 The longest total solar eclipse of the 21st century, 
 lasting up to 6 minutes and 38.8 seconds, occurred over 
 parts of Asia and the Pacific Ocean.
2014  smiled.

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