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Good Morning,  !

Today is Thursday, August 21

Have FUN!
DearWebby


Today's International Bonehead Award goes to a Man arrested for murder in R.I. home invasion Details at Boneheads From the History section at the bottom: Today, in 1923 In Kalamazoo, Michigan, an ordinance was passed forbidding dancers from gazing into the eyes of their partner.
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. --- W. C. Fields (1880 - 1946)
The impish girl turned on the tractor and pushed the outhouse into the creek. Later, her father told her the story of George Washington chopping down his father's cherry tree but wasn't spanked because he had told the truth. The girl proudly announced, "I cannot tell a lie. I pushed the outhouse into the creek." He told her to bend over and the shocked child protested that George Washington had not been punished. The father replied, "Well, George's father wasn't IN the cherry tree when it got chopped down!"
>From Len I think the pilot on my last trip was pretty new to his job. I base that on his pre-flight announcement, 'We're going to be taking off in a few... OOOPS! Here we go!'


An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Rudy Chavez, 43, ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. Man arrested for murder in R.I. home invasion The man believed to be responsible for the shooting death of 26-year-old Richard Catalano in North Providence on Sunday has been arraigned at the hospital. 24-year-old Dari Max Garcia has been charged with first degree murder, 2 counts assault with a deadly weapon, burglary, assault with intent to commit a felony, and several firearms charges. Garcia has an extensive criminal record and has served time behind bars in the past. Garcia was arraigned on charges yesterday inside Rhode Island Hospital where he is being treated for a self inflicted gunshot wound. The incident happened just before midnight on Sunday when the suspect allegedly showed up at the Eliot Avenue attempting to gain access. When he entered he had a gun and struggled with the victim's mother and step father. During the struggle police say that Garcia bit Catalano's mother's finger off and shot her in the throat. Catalano was also shot and he was pronounced dead on the scene. Police say when they arrived Garcia attempted to kill himself and was unsuccessfull. He was brought to the hospital to be treated for injuries while in police custody. Catalano's mother is currently recovering from her injuries at Rhode Island Hospital. WPRI reports that Garcia has a "lengthy" criminal history, punctuated by an incident in February in which he was shot in the abdomen during an altercation with a police officer. He had just finished a two-year prison sentence for narcotics violations, and after the shooting he was charged with domestic assault and possession of heroin, among other charges. He is out on bail awaiting trial on those charges. Police are looking into whether the incident may be connected to a earlier incident involving a bogus shoe sale at an event at Brown University. Tech Support Pits From: Fanny Re: Blacklist size Dear Webby I noticed that the blacklist is getting quite huge. That must be slowing things down badly. What size would you call the maximum size? Thanks Fanny Dear Fanny What a nice and delightful name! Spammers never use the same address twice, unless they forge your name as the sender name. It is quite safe to age off the blacklist in three days. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Use Ice Scraper for Cleaning Using my favorite and best cooking pot, I put some green beans on to cook and went to the computer to check the weather while the strings beans were coming to a boil. While checking on the weather, I got distracted by something else that struck my interest and I completely forgot the green beans. Next thing I knew, the smoke alarm was blaring and the green beans were burned and stuck to the bottom of the pot. I tried all different methods to clean the pot and thought the Teflon finish was pitted and my pot ruined. Then, my husband suggested I try using the little plastic ice scraper I had stuck back in the "catch it all" drawer. It worked wonders and I was able to get my pot back in tip top shape. The finish on the pot was not harmed. By Litter Gitter [103] Check out ThriftyFun's Blog
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.

A doctor said to his patient: "You have a slight heart con- dition, but I wouldn't worry about it." "Really, Doc?" the patient replied. "Well, if you had a slight heart condition I wouldn't worry about it either."
After trying a new shampoo for the first time. A guy fired off an enthusiastic letter of approval to the manufacturer. Several weeks later he came home from work to a large carton in the middle of the floor. Inside were free samples of the many products the company produced: soaps, detergents, tooth paste, and paper items. "Well, what do you think" his wife asked smiling. "Next time," he replied. "I'm writing to Mercedes!

Farm Crops

Today in 
1680 The Pueblo Indians drove the Spanish out and took 
 possession of Santa Fe, NM. 
1831 Nat Turner, a former slave, led a violent insurrection 
 in Virginia. He was later executed. 
1841 A patent for venetian blinds was issued to John Hampton. 
1888 The adding machine was patented by William Burroughs. 
1923 In Kalamazoo, Michigan, an ordinance was passed 
 forbidding dancers from gazing into the eyes of their partner. 
1943 Japan evacuated the Aleutian island of Kiaska. Kiaska 
 had been the last North American foothold by the Japanese. 
1945 U.S. President Truman ended the Lend-Lease program that 
 had shipped about $50 billion in aid to America's Allies 
 during World War II. 
1959 Hawaii became the 50th state. U.S. President Eisenhower 
 also issued the order for the 50 star flag. 
1963 In South Vietnam, martial law was declared. Army troops 
and police began to crack down on the Buddhist anti-
 government protesters. 
1989 Voyager 2, a U.S. space probe, got close to the Neptune 
 moon called Triton. 
1991 The hard-line coup against Soviet President Mikhail 
 Gorbachev ended. The uprising that led to the collapse 
 was led by Russian federation President Boris Yeltsin. 
1993 NASA lost contact with the Mars Observer spacecraft. 
 The fate of the spacecraft was unknown. The mission cost 
 $980 million. 
1997 Hudson Foods Inc. closed a plant in Nebraska after it 
 had recalled 25 million pounds of ground beef that was 
 potentially contaminated with E. coli 01557:H7. It was 
 the largest food recall in U.S. history. 
1997 Afghanistan suspended its embassy operations in the 
 United States. 
2002 In Pakistan, President General Pervez Musharraf 
 unilaterally amended the Pakistani constitution. He 
 extended his term in office and granted himself powers 
 that included the right to dissolve parliament. 
2014  smiled.


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