Numeric keypad for laptop 

Good Morning,  !

Today is Friday,  August 22
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!

Have FUN!

Today's International Bonehead Award goes to a New Mexico man who drove a hot cart to meet a probation officer Details at Boneheads From the History section at the bottom: Today, in 1996 U.S. President Clinton signed legislation that ended guaranteed cash payments to the poor and demanded work from recipients. That did not last long.
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
The only function of economic forecasting is to make astrology look respectable. --- John Kenneth Galbraith (1908 - 2006) The closest to perfection anyone ever comes is when he or she fills out a job application form. --- Socratex
When the family car developed a slight knock, the husband asked his wife if she had bought premium or regular gas, but she couldn't remember. "You probably got the cheaper gas," he said. "That could account for the engine running so rough." "No, the gas wasn't cheaper!" she replied indignantly. "Well, how much did it cost?" asked the husband probingly. "It cost the same as always." said the wife. "I told the man to put in the usual ten dollars worth."
Thanks to Dianne for this story: I feel inadequate when talking with a mechanic, so when my vehicle started making a strange noise, I sought help from a friend. He drove the car around the block, listened carefully, then told me how to explain the difficulty when I took it in for repair. At the shop I proudly recited, "The timing is off, and there are premature detonations, which may damage the valves." As I smugly glanced over the mechanic's shoulder, I saw him write on his clipboard, "Lady says it makes a funny noise."
Thanks to jean for sending this:

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Michael Johnson, 18, Man Drives Hot Cart To Meet Probation Officer AUGUST 20 The 18-year-old New Mexico man was arrested Monday after allegedly driving a stolen Walmart electric shopping cart to a meeting with his probation officer. Johnson drove the hot cart to the Metropolitan Courthouse in Albuquerque. Johnson, whose rap sheet includes several arrests, is on probation for a conviction earlier this year. According to a criminal complaint, when Megan Cutler, Johnson’s probation officer, asked him where he got the shopping cart, he admitted to taking it from a Walmart about five miles from the courthouse. Johnson added that he “did not have permission to take the cart.” An Albuquerque Police Department officer subsequently contacted a Walmart official who said that the electric cart is worth $1845 and that the retailer wanted to press charges. Johnson was then arrested for larceny and receiving stolen property and booked into the Bernalillo County jail, where he remains locked up. The teenager is facing an additional charge for violating terms of his probation. He was arrested last year for battery against a household member and interference with communications. In May, he pleaded guilty to the latter count, which usually relates to somehow preventing a victim from contacting police. Johnson lives about 11 miles from the courthouse. The complaint does not reveal when he took the Walmart cart or how far he drove it to the courthouse. Tech Support Pits From: Helga Re: Numeric keys for laptop Dear Webby The numeric keypad keys on my laptop are dual-function keys embedded in the regular keyboard. It does have the numbers again on top, but I can't get any speed going with those. Is there a solution for that? Thanks Helga Yes, you can get numeric keypads quite cheaply. For example: V7, wired, $7 Targus wireless $22 If you go to a surveyors or engineering supply store, you can get thigh holsters for the wireless Targus. You have probably seen surveyors on the side of the road peering through their instruments and fingering something on their thigh. Most likely what you saw was that Targus wireless numeric keypad in a thigh holster. If your desk space is limited, or if you are using your lap as your desk, the thigh holster will also be really handy. You can get fantastic speed with one of them. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Keep Purse with Shopping Bags I don't know if you have this problem, but I do. I try to use reusable grocery bags as much as possible, but I forget to bring them into the store! Same with my coupons and sometimes even my shopping list! The Solution: Now at home, I place my purse directly "into" one of my reusable, cloth grocery bags and add my coupons, list and key ring to a hook on the bag as well. Then I hang this bag by the door. Every time I get home, I immediately place my purse in that hanging bag and the keys on the ring. Now when I am going shopping, I bring the purse "still" in the bag with me to carry in to the store together. I can store or add additional folded bags in the bottom of that same bag (as well as coupons and shopping list in a little pocket on the front of the bag and bring it "all" into the store with me on shopping day! Once home and unpacked, I make sure to put them all back into that main bag along with my purse once again and place it back on its designated hook. By Donna [128] Check out ThriftyFun's Blog
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.

THEN…In walked a very stern looking English teacher and a hush fell over the room as the kids scurried to their seats. The stern teacher silently panned his gaze across all the kids. After about a minute or so, he spoke: "From the outset, I want you all to know that there are two words that are absolutely unacceptable in this classroom. You cannot use them as you recite, or in any of your papers, tests, or homework. Using these words even once, will get you a failing grade for that quarter. The first one is "gross". And the other one is "cool". Are there any questions?" After a few moments of silence, this gawky teen at the back of the room raises his hand, and the teacher calls upon him. In a pubescent croaking voice, the kid asks: "So, what are these gross and cool words?"
A hospital posted a notice in the nurses' break room saying: "Remember, the first five minutes of a human being's life are the most dangerous." Underneath, a nurse had written: "The last five are pretty scary too."

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Today in 
1485 The War of the Roses ended with the death of England's 
 King Richard III. He was killed in the Battle of Bosworth 
 Field. His successor was Henry V II. 
1567 The "Council of Blood" was established by the Duke of 
 Alba. This was the beginning of his reign of terror in 
 the Netherlands. 
1642 The English Civil War began when Charles I called 
 Parliament and its soldiers traitors. 
1770 Australia was claimed under the British crown when 
 Captain James Cook landed there. 
1775 The American colonies were proclaimed to be in a state 
 of open rebellion by England's King George III. 
1846 The U.S. annexed New Mexico. 
1851 The schooner America outraced the Aurora off the English 
 coast to win a trophy that became known as the America's Cup. 
1865 A patent for liquid soap was issued to William Sheppard. 
1906 The Victor Talking Machine Company of Camden, NJ began 
 to manufacture the Victrola. The hand-cranked unit, with 
 horn cabinet, sold for $200. 
1910 Japan formally annexed Korea. 
1911 It was announced that Leonardo da Vinci's "Mona Lisa" 
 had been stolen from the Louvre Museum in Paris. The 
 painting reappeared two years later in Italy. 
1932 The BBC (British Broadcasting Corporation) began its 
 first TV broadcast in England. 
1941 Nazi troops reached the outskirts of Leningrad during 
 World War II. 
1972 Due to its racial policies, Rhodesia was asked to 
 withdraw from the 20th Olympic Summer Games. 
1973 Henry Kissinger was named Secretary of State by U.S. 
 President Nixon. Kissinger won the Nobel Peace Prize in 
 the same year. 
1984 The last Volkswagen Rabbit rolled off the assembly 
 line in New Stanton, PA. 
1986 Kerr-McGee Corp. agreed to pay the estate of the late 
 Karen Silkwood $1.38 million to settle a 10-year-old 
 nuclear contamination lawsuit. 
1990 U.S. President George H.W. Bush signed an order for calling 
 reservists to aid in the build up of troops in the Persian Gulf. 
1990 The U.S. State Department announced that the U.S. Embassy 
 in Kuwait would not be closed under President Saddam 
 Hussein's demand. 
1990 Angry smokers blocked a street in Moscow to protest the 
 summer-long cigarette shortage. 
1991 Mikhail S. Gorbachev returned to Moscow after the 
 collapse of the hard-liners' coup. On the same day he purged 
 the men that had tried to oust him. 
1992 In Rostock, Germany, neo-Nazi violence broke out 
 against foreigners. 
1996 U.S. President Clinton signed legislation that ended 
 guaranteed cash payments to the poor and demanded work 
 from recipients. 
2004 In Oslo, Norway, a version of Edvard Munch's "The Scream" 
 and his work "Madonna" were stolen from the Munch Museum. 
 This version of "The Scream," one of four different versions, 
 was a tempera painting on board. 
2014  smiled.

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