Are free Anti-Virus programs worth their cost? 

Good Morning,  !

Today is Tuesday, September 2

Have FUN!

Today's International Bonehead Award goes to a 3 "Hostages", who were actually just dopes hallucinating on meth Details at Boneheads Today, in From the History section at the bottom: 1996 Muslim rebels and the Philippine government signed a pact formally ending 26-years of insurgency that had killed more than 120,000 people.
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't. --- Erica Jong
Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, the creator of the world-famous detective, Sherlock Holmes, was not above telling tales about himself in which he was the laughing-stock. In one situation, he was waiting at a taxi stand outside the railway station in Paris. When a taxi pulled up, he placed his suitcase in the car and took a seat next to it. "Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?'' asked the taxi driver. Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver whether he knew him by sight. "No, sir, I have never seen you before." The puzzled Doyle asked him how he knew he was Conan Doyle. The driver said, "This morning's paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you're a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. And so, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle." Doyle remarked, "This is truly amazing. You are a real life counterpart to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes." "There is one other thing that gave you away," the driver said, after pocketing his tip. "What is that?" questioned Doyle. The driver said, "Your name is on the front of your suitcase."
A couple was taking a stroll through a park, when they came upon a wishing well. The woman leaned over, made a wish and threw a quarter down the well. Her husband decided that he also wanted to make a wish. Unfortunately, he leaned over too far and fell down the well. The woman stood there in shock for a moment and said, "Wow! It really works!"
Thanks to Lillemor for this picture:

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Lakeisha Johnson, WEST PARK, Floriduh 3 "Hostages", who were actually just dopes hallucinating on meth Yes, this happened in Floriduh. The Jackson County Sheriff's Office responded last Sunday after reports that three people were screaming out of a home, claiming to have been taken hostage. WMBB reports that authorities arrived at the residence and were told that the three supposed victims -- 18-year-old Madison Douglas, 21-year-old Damian Hines, and 30-year-old Matthew McDaniel -- had been taken hostage for several hours. They were also told the supposed hostages were shot at in the home. Police soon discovered that the group had in fact hallucinated while on meth. Douglas said she had been stabbed by a suspect, but authorities said she had only a light scratch on her abdomen that was self-inflicted. More from WMBB: Numerous windows were shot out and holes were shot in the walls. They completely removed a large rear window from the house on the second floor and threw the bathroom sink at the imaginary attackers. Chunks of sheetrock, wood, firearm parts, and anything they could tear out of the residence was thrown outside including the toilet, which was ripped from the floor. In total, more than $10,000 damage was done to the residence. All three were charged with possession of meth, attempt to manufacture meth, felony criminal mischief, and possession of drug paraphernalia. Tech Support Pits From: Richi Re: Free Anti-Virus I Have a Simple ? For you.. Out of all the free antiviruses out there , I know there are some goood ones and I k now the paid ones are better but which of the free ones do you recommend? Richi Dear Richi That is like asking me whether a Kentucky Fried Chicken bucket is better head protection on a Motorcycle than an ice cream bucket. For some people, who have nothing valuable between the ears, either one of those buckets will make them street legal. Some others prefer a full face Bell helmet. If you got nothing valuable to protect and don't mind formatting and re-installing Windows every now and then, then go ahead and use AVG or any of the free ones. I prefer McAfee. I tested Vipre, and did not get any infection while using it for 3 months, but found that it slows me down. Keep in mind, I probably ride a lot faster, and have more programs open and on the go, than you have. They do have a free trial. Vipre's special occasion deals are usually more expensive. Try their free trial and see if they lower the price after the Back-To-School sales. With McAfee, if you use my special link and don't try to go behind my back, you can still get "Total Protection" for $44 Otherwise expect to pay about double that. Yes, I know, that is a lot of money, but getting the Geek Squad to get viruses and trojans out of your machine would cost you more than twice that. So, decide whether the stuff you got on your computer warrants an ice cream bucket, or a full face helmet. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Use Ice Cream Scoop For Measuring By Irishwitch Spray an ice cream scooper with Pam, the use it to scoop out peanut butter or shortening, your finger will be kept clean! I scoop equals 1/4 cup. By Irishwitch [379] Check out ThriftyFun's Blog
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.

He had a kitten that climbed up a tree in his backyard and then was afraid to come down. The Pastor coaxed, offered warm milk, etc. The kitty would not come down. The tree was not sturdy enough to climb, so the Pastor decided that if he tied a rope to his car and pulled it until the tree bent down, he could then r each up and get the kitten. That's what he did, all the while checking his progress in the car. He then figured if he went just a little bit further, the tree would be bent sufficiently for him to reach the kitten. But as he moved the car a little further forward, the rope broke. The tree went "boing!" and the kitten instantly sailed through the air - out of sight. The Pastor felt terrible. He walked all over the neighborhood asking people if they'd seen a little kitten. No. Nobody had seen a stray kitten So he prayed, "Lord, I just commit this kitten to your keeping," and went on about his business. A few days later he was at the grocery store, and met one of his church members. He happened to look into her s hopping cart and was amazed to see cat food. This woman was a cat hater and everyone knew it, so he asked her, "Why are you buying cat food when you hate cats so much?" She replied, "You won't believe this," and then told him how her little girl had been begging her for a cat, but she kept refusing. Then a few days before, the child had begged again, s o the Mom finally told her little girl, "Well, if God gives you a cat, I'll let you keep it." She told the Pastor, "I watched my child go out in the yard, get on her knees, and ask God for a cat. And really, Pastor, you won't believe this, but I saw it with my own eyes. A kitten suddenly came flying out of the blue sky, with its paws outspread, and landed right in front of her."
Two elderly ladies met at the launderette after not seeing one another for some time. After inquiring about each other's health, one asked how the other's husband was doing. "Oh! Ted died last week. He went out to the garden to dig up a cabbage for dinner, had a heart attack and dropped down dead right there in the middle of the vegetable patch!" "Oh dear! I'm very sorry." replied her friend "What did you do?" "Opened a can of peas instead."

Harvest Machines

Today in 
31 B.C. The Roman leader Octavian defeated the alliance of 
 Mark Antony and Cleopatra. Octavian, as Augustus Caesar, 
 became the first Roman emperor. 
1666 The Great Fire of London broke out. The fire burned for 
 three days destroying 10,000 buildings including St. Paul's 
 Cathedral. Only 6 people were killed. 
1775 Hannah, the first American war vessel was commissioned 
 by General George Washington. 
1864 During the U.S. Civil War Union forces led by Gen. 
 William T. Sherman occupied Atlanta following the retreat 
 of the Confederates. 
1901 Theodore Roosevelt, then Vice President, said "Speak 
 softly and carry a big stick" in a speech at the Minnesota 
 State Fair. 
1930 The "Question Mark" made the first non-stop flight from 
 Europe to the U.S. The plane was flown by Captains Dieudonne 
 Coste and Maurice Bellonte. 
1938 The first railroad car to be equipped with fluorescent 
 lighting was put into operation on the New York Central 
1945 Ho Chi Minh declared the independence the Democratic 
 Republic of Vietnam. 
1961 The U.S.S.R. resumed nuclear weapons testing. Test ban 
 treaty negotiations had failed with the U.S. and Britain 
 when the three nations could not agree upon the nature and 
 frequency of on-site inspections. 
1963 The integration of Tuskegee High School was prevented 
 by state troopers assigned by Alabama Gov. George Wallace. 
 Wallace had the building surrounded by state troopers. 
1969 NBC-TV canceled "Star Trek." The show had debuted on 
 September 8, 1966. 
1991 The U.S. formally recognized the independence of 
 Lithuania, Lativa and Estonia. 
1992 The U.S. and Russia agreed to a joint venture to build 
 a space station. 
1996 Muslim rebels and the Philippine government signed a 
 pact formally ending 26-years of insurgency that had killed 
 more than 120,000 people. 
1998 In Canada, pilots for Canada's largest airline launch 
 their first strike in Air Canada's history. 
2014  smiled.

[ view entry ] ( 12 views )   |  permalink  |  print article  |   ( 3 / 1628 )

<<First <Back | 51 | 52 | 53 | 54 | 55 | 56 | 57 | 58 | 59 | 60 | Next> Last>>