Tame the icon chaos 

Good Morning, ,
Today is Sunday, November 2

Thank you, Jim!

Fall back an hour. We are on winter time now,
same as Europe.
Except Saskatchewan and parts of Arizona.
As far as I am concerned, we could happily stay on summer 
time. I am really not looking forward to all the snow 
shoveling. Last night during my walk, it snowed. 

Dad told me on Skype yesterday, that some of the ski slopes 
there are opening, and the resorts are clamoring for 
waitresses and chambermaids. Usually those people don't
show up until the last week of December, so now there is
major panic. Gullible warming is definitely over. 
Many of the lifts and cablecars and chair lifts are running,
but the thousands of hotels and pensions are still dark.
I guess they will just have to hire their staff for November
for the next 25 0 30 years until the next Gullible Warming
part of the cycles.

Have FUN!

Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Texas woman tried to force fellatio on victim Details at Boneheads Today, in 1947 Howard Hughes flew his "Spruce Goose," a huge wooden airplane, for eight minutes in California. It was the plane's first and only flight.
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Discretion is not the better part of biography. --- Lytton Strachey (1880 - 1932) Let everyone sweep in front of his own door and the whole world will be clean. --- Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe
"You're in incredible shape," the doctor said. "How old are you again?" "I am 78." The man said. "78?" asked the doctor. "How do you stay so healthy? You look like a 60 year old." "Well, my wife and I made a pact when we got married that whenever she got mad she would go into the kitchen and cool off and I would go outside to settle down." the man explained. "What does that have to do with it?" asked the doctor. "I've pretty much lived an outdoor life."
Early one morning, my husband, who works in a funeral home, woke me, complaining of severe abdominal pains. We rushed to the emergency room, where tests were performed to determine the source of the pain. My husband decided not to have me call in sick for him until we knew what was wrong. When the results came back, the nurse informed us that, true to our suspicions, he was suffering from a kidney stone. I turned to my husband and asked, "Would you like me to call the funeral home now?" With a scornful look, the nurse turned to me and snapped, "Honey, he's not THAT sick!"
A marketing survey specialist is asking Dan, a southern college kid, some questions about different products he uses. MSS - Which shaving cream do you use? Dan - Baba's MSS - Which aftershave do you use? Dan - Baba's MSS - Which deodorant do you use? Dan - Baba's MSS - Which toothpaste do you use? Dan - Baba's MSS - Okay, tell me, what is this 'Baba'? Is it an international company? Dan - Heck no. He's my room-mate.
Thanks to Dawn for this picture Click through for the large picture
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD Megan Hoelting, 31, Williamson County, Texas Texas woman tried to force fellatio on victim A Texas woman walked into the home of a male friend of her husband’s and sexually assaulted the man while he was sleeping, police allege. According to court records, Megan Davis Hoelting, 31, entered the victim’s Williamson County residence Monday night through an unlocked gate. Once inside the property, Hoelting, who was wearing a nightgown, went into the man’s bedroom, where he was sleeping. A felony criminal complaint charges that Hoelting fondled the man’s genitals and attempted to “perform fellatio upon him.” The man told a Williamson County Sheriff’s Office deputy that he “awoke to the feeling of an unknown party on top of him,” adding that he “felt the offender placed his penis in her mouth.” Aided by a flashlight application on his cell phone, the victim recognized Hoelting, whose breasts were exposed, as “his friend’s wife.” He directed her to leave the residence, but when Hoelting refused to leave, he dialed 911. During subsequent questioning, Hoelting reportedly admitted getting into the victim’s bed, where she “kissed him and wrapped her legs around his waist.” Hoelting added that she was wearing a nightgown when she entered the home, but removed the garment and was “wearing only panties when she got into the bed”, with the victim’s knowledge. Hoelting, seen in the above mug shot, was arrested on a felony charge of burglarizing a home with the intent of committing a sexual assault. She was booked Monday night into the county lockup, where she remains in custody. Jail records show that Hoelting has been arrested three other times this month. On October 14 she was busted for theft. Two days later she was jailed for assault, and on October 21 she was collared for public intoxication. Tech Support Pits From: Earline Re: Icon Chaos Dear Webby I got total icon chaos on my desktop and quite frequently can't find an icon, that I need. Windows seems to dump the occasional one now and then, when I am not looking, and other times moves them around. Yeah, I know, changing the resolution totally trashes the desktop, but even when I don't, some icons always disappear. Whqat is the Master's trick to get that under control? Earline Dear Earline You could make desktop folders and drag icons into them, but they are usually a nuisance, becasue you can't see what is in them, and icons in them seem to disappear too. On Linux you have "shelves" for different categories of icons. You can arrange your icons similarly. First, to reduce the disappearance of icons, move them all away from the edge. Those are the most endangered ones. Next get or paint a bookshelf, and enlarge the picture to the number of pixels of resolution you got set. Label each shelf with a category or topic, for example Tools, Music, Movies, Recipes, Receipts, Orders, etc. Make that picture the desktop wallpaper. Now move all icons onto the shelves, where they belong. You can't reduce the shelves to an icon like in Linux, but at least you will have the chaos under control. Have FUN! DearWebby
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While visiting a friend who was in the hospital, I noticed several pretty nurses, each of whom was wearing a pin designed to look like an apple. I asked one nurse what the pin signified. "Nothing," she said with a smile. "It's just to keep the doctors away."
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com String Cheese Witch Brooms In an effort to offer multiple healthy treats at my daughter's Halloween party, we set up a station to make string cheese witch brooms. We set out a bowl of stick pretzels, a plate of string cheese (pre-cut), and plastic knives for them to cut the broom bristles. These are easy enough for even younger kids to make. :) By lalala... [513] http://www.thriftyfun.com/
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.

When our second child was on the way, my wife and I attended a pre-birth class aimed at couples who had already had at least one child. The instructor raised the issue of breaking the news to the older child. It went like this: "Some parents," she said, "tell the older child, 'We love you so much we decided to bring another child into this family.' But think about that. Ladies, what if your husband came home one day and said, 'Honey, I love you so much I decided to bring home another wife.'" One of the women spoke up immediately. "Does she wash, iron, and cook?"
Two storks are sitting in their nest: a father stork and baby stork. The baby stork is crying and crying and father stork is trying to calm him. "Don't worry, son. Your mother will come back. She's only bringing people babies and making them happy." The next night, it's father's turn to do the job. Mother and son are sitting in the nest, the baby stork is crying, and mother is saying "Son, your father will be back as soon as possible, but now he's bringing joy to new mommies and daddies." A few days later, the stork's parents are desperate: their son is absent from the nest all night! Shortly before dawn, he returns and the parents ask him where he's been all night. The baby stork says, "Nowhere. Just scaring the crap out of college students!"

7 Wonders to Modern World

Today in 
1721 Peter the Great (Peter I), ruler of Russia, changed 
 his title to emperor. 
1867 "Harpers Bazaar" magazine was founded. 
1883 Thomas Edison got a patent for an electrical indicator 
 using the Edison effect lamp (U.S. Pat. 307,031). 
1895 In Chicago, IL, the first American gasoline powered car 
1917 British Foreign Secretary Arthur Balfour expressed 
 support for a "national home" for the Jews of Palestine. 
1920 The first commercial radio station in the U.S., 
 KDKA of Pittsburgh, PA, began regular broadcasting. 
1930 Haile Selassie was crowned emperor of Ethiopia. 
1930 The DuPont Company announced the first synthetic 
 rubber. It was named DuPrene. 
1947 Howard Hughes flew his "Spruce Goose," a huge wooden 
 airplane, for eight minutes in California. It was the 
 plane's first and only flight. The "Spruce Goose," 
 nicknamed because of the white-gray color of the spruce 
 used to build it, never went into production. 
1960 In London, the novel "Lady Chatterly's Lover," was 
 found not guilty of obscenity. 
1963 South Vietnamese President Ngo Dihn Diem was 
 assassinated in a military coup. 
1966 The Cuban Adjustment Act allows 123,000 Cubans to 
 apply for permanent residence in the U.S. 
1979 Joanna Chesimard, a black militant escaped from a New 
 Jersey prison, where she'd been serving a life sentence for 
 the 1973 murder of a New Jersey state trooper. 
1983 U.S. President Ronald Reagan signed a bill establishing 
 a federal holiday on the third Monday of January in honor of 
 civil rights leader Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. 
1984 Velma Barfield became the first woman to be executed in 
 the U.S. since 1962. She had been convicted of the poisoning 
 death of her boyfriend. 
1985 The South African government imposed severe restrictions 
 on television, radio and newspaper coverage of unrest by both 
 local and foreign journalists. 
1989 Carmen Fasanella retired after 68 years and 243 days of 
 taxicab service in Princeton, NJ. 
1992 Magic Johnson retired from the NBA again, this time for 
 good because of fear due to his HIV infection. 
1993 The U.S. Senate called for full disclosure of Senator Bob 
 Packwood's diaries in a sexual harassment probe. 
2001 The computer-animated movie "Monsters, Inc." opened. 
 The film recorded the best debut ever for an animated film 
 and the 6th best of all time. 
2003 In the U.S., the Episcopal Church diocese consecrated the 
 church's first openly gay bishop.
2014  smiled.

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