Bad Skype Update 

Good Morning, ,
Today is Monday, December 8

Fantastic full moon out tonight.

Have FUN!

Today's Bonehead Award goes to a
Florida woman, who tasered her 3 year old nephew.
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1984 In Roanoke, Virginia, a jury found Hustler magazine 
 publisher Larry Flynt innocent of libeling Reverend Jerry 
 Falwell with a parody advertisement. However Falwell was 
 awarded $200,000 for emotional distress. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History
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In the United States there is more space where nobody is than where anybody is. That is what makes America what it is. Gertrude Stein (1874 - 1946), ______________________________________________________ Wife: "Doctor My husband thinks he's a satellite dish." Doctor: "Don't worry I can cure him." Wife: "I don't want him cured I want you to adjust him to get the movie channel." ______________________________________________________ WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON? Both don't want any more kids. IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED? It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them. ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Nanarina for this picture: Click through for the big picture ______________________________________________________
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______________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Ramona Braswell 30 St. Petersburg, Florida Woman arrested for using stun gun on child A St. Petersburg woman is accused of zapping her 3-year-old nephew with a stun gun. And, her own sister called police to report the child abuse. Investigators say the boy had marks on his arm to prove it. Ramona Braswell, 30, is now out of jail and she tells 10 News that she wouldn't zap her nephew with a stun gun, she loves him. Police say the way she showed it this weekend is criminal. "It seems clear to the officer that she actually did apply the charge to the child," says Mike Puetz, police department spokesman. It was Rodney's mom, Karen Braswell's, who called 911 and that landed her sister in lockup facing the felony child abuse charges. "My baby started crying, and I just wanted to know what was wrong," says Karen Braswell on the 911 call. The operator asks, "OK, who tased him?" "My sister," Karen Braswell replied. Today, Karen Braswell had a tearful apology for her sister, "I'm sorry, and I hope I can fix all of this," says Karen Braswell. To prevent Child Protection Services from removing all of her kids, the mother and aunt are now changing the story, however, police has seen the mark of the taser. Tech Support Pits From: Eloise Re: New Skype Dear Webby Dear Webby, Skype snuck in an update, even though I did not want it. Unless somebody has a company supplied 3 foot monitor like the overpaid and useless wackos at Microsoft, it is totally useless. Everything is spaced out like a bunch of scattered clouds and wasting way too much space! What are those idiots smoking? I need to have a compact interface, so that I can have other stuff open on the side. You can't select compact view in the current version. What do I do now? Eloise Dear Eloise I agree, whatever they are smoking, should be made illegal. It makes them look very incompetent. Luckily you can go back to a previous version, before the pufter version. 6.20.0 You don't have to un-install the pufter version, just install 6.20.0 over top of it. All your contacts and history will remain the same, but you get the compact user interface back. Somebody from Microsoft claimed on a forum that Skype version 7 has those problems fixed, but I would wait a week and see how much howling it causes. Traditionally even numbered versions are a disaster and it takes a few fixes and revisions to level that out. .20 seems to be fine. Personally, I won't be in a rush to try 7 until about 7.20 Have FUN! DearWebby
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A football coach walked into the locker room before a game, looked over to his star player and said, "I'm not supposed to let you play since you failed math, but we need you in there. So what I have to do is ask you a math question, and if you get it right, you can play." The player agreed, and the coach looked into his eyes intently and asks, "Okay, now concentrate... what is two plus two?" The player thought for a moment and then he answered, "4?" "Did you say 4?!?" the coach exclaimed, excited that he got it right. At that, all the other players on the team began screaming, "Come on coach, give him another chance!"
Daily tip from Newspaper Comics for Giftwrap I love giving gifts all year long. Years ago it hit me one day that sometimes my wrappings cost nearly as much as the gift itself! Now I use comics from the newspaper to wrap my gifts. I already get the paper, so it's free! People actually really enjoy the wrap too, they think it's cute.:) By melissa [40] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
______________________________________________________ I couldn't help overhearing a man on his phone. "I know it's something you want," he said earnestly, "but I don't think tattoos are a good idea. And the same goes for body piercing. As long as you're living in my house, I think you should respect my wishes." I was secretly cheering him on for his fatherly firmness. Then came the 'coup de grace': "Besides, Mom, you're 75 years old! You don't NEED a tattoo!" ______________________________________________________ Little Johnny's father was a pastor in a small church. One day, his father told Little Johnny that a very important bishop was coming and that he would be staying with them. Little Johnny became very excited and asked his father if he would get to meet him. His father thought about this and decided that he would let Little Johnny bring the bishop tea in the morning and wake him up. Little Johnny agreed to do this and was very excited. His father gave him instructions: first, knock on the door of the bishops room and then say to him "It's the boy, my Lord, it's time to get up." Little Johnny was very excited and rehearsed his lines repeating them over and over. Finally the day came and Little Johnny had learned all his lines. He went to the door and knocked. He was so excited and nervous though that his lines got mixed up and the boy said, "It's the Lord, my boy, and your time is up!"

Exotic flowers

Today in 
1776 George Washington's retreating army in the American 
 Revolution crossed the Delaware River from New Jersey to 
1854 Pope Pius IX proclaimed the dogma of the Immaculate 
 Conception. The theory holds that Mary, mother of Jesus, 
 was free of original sin from the moment she was conceived.
1863 U.S. President Abraham Lincoln announced his plan for 
 the Reconstruction of the South. 
1863 Tom King of England defeated American John Heenan and
 became the first world heavyweight champion. 
1941 The United States entered World War II when it declared 
 war against Japan. The act came one day after the Japanese 
 attacked Pearl Harbor. Britain and Canada also declared 
 war on Japan. The US had been fighting Japan in Asia for 
 some time and most US battleships were already in Asia 
 or Midway. That saved the US Navy from Japan's attack.
1949 The Chinese Nationalist government moved from the 
 Chinese mainland to Formosa due to Communists pressure. 
1953 Los Angeles became the third largest city in the US.
1962 Workers of the International Typographical Union 
 began striking and closed nine New York City newspapers. 
 The strike lasted 114 days and ended April 1, 1963. 
1980 Zimbabwe’s manpower minister, Edgar Tekere, was found 
 guilty in the killing of a white farmer. He was freed under 
 a law that protected ministers acting to suppress terrorism. 
1982 Norman D. Mayer demanding an end to nuclear weapons held 
 the Washington Monument hostage. He threatened to blow it up 
 with explosives he claimed were inside a van. 10 hours later 
 he was shot to death by police. 
1984 In Roanoke, Virginia, a jury found Hustler magazine 
 publisher Larry Flynt innocent of libeling Reverend Jerry 
 Falwell with a parody advertisement. However Falwell was 
 awarded $200,000 for emotional distress. 
1987 U.S. President Reagan and Soviet leader Mikhail S. 
 Gorbachev signed a treaty agreeing to destroy their nations' 
 arsenals of intermediate-range nuclear missiles. 
1987 The "intefadeh" (Arabic for uprising) by Palestinians 
 in the Israeli-occupied territories began. 
1989 Communist leaders in Czechoslovakia offered to surrender 
 their control over the government and accept a minority role 
 in a coalition Cabinet.
1991 Russia, Byelorussia and Ukraine declared the Soviet 
 national government to be dead. They forged a new alliance to 
 be known as the Commonwealth of Independent States. The act 
 was denounced by Russian President Gorbachev as unconstitutional. 
1992 Americans got to see live television coverage of U.S. troops 
 landing on the beaches of Somalia during Operation Restore Hope.
1993 U.S. President Clinton signed into law the North American 
 Free Trade Agreement. 
1994 Bosnian Serbs released dozens of hostage peacekeepers, but 
 continued to detain about 300 others. 
1994 In Los Angeles, 12 alternate jurors were chosen for the 
 O.J. Simpson murder trial. 
1997 The second largest bank was created with the announcement 
 that Union Bank Switzerland and the Swiss Bank Corporation 
 would merge. The combined assets were more than $590 billion. 
1998 The U.S. Supreme Court ruled that police could not search 
 a person or their cars after ticketing for a routine traffic 
1998 The FBI opened its files on Frank Sinatra to the public. 
 The file contained over 1,300 pages. 
1998 AT&T Corp. announced that it was buying IBM's data 
 networking business for $5 billion cash. 
1998 The first female ice hockey game in Olympic history was 
 played. Finland beat Sweden 6-0. 
1999 In Memphis, TN, a jury found that Rev. Martin Luther 
 King Jr. had been the victim of a vast murder conspiracy, 
 not a lone assassin. 
1999 Russia and Belarus agreed in principle to form an 
 economic and political confederation. 
2000 Mario Lemieux announced to the Pittsburgh Penguins 
 that he planned to return to the National Hockey League (NHL) 
 as a player at age 35. He would be the first modern owner-player 
 in U.S. pro sports. 
2014  smiled.

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