Microslop characters 

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Today is Tuesday, December 23

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Today's Bonehead Award goes to a
Florida man arrested after killing a cop
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1942 Bob Hope agreed to entertain U.S. airmen in Alaska. 
 It was the first of the traditional Christmas shows. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man, and I hate people like that! --- Tom Lehrer (1928 - ) The greatest thing in this world is not so much where we stand as in what direction we are moving. --- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe ______________________________________________________ In a cafeteria : "Shoes are required to eat in the cafeteria." (hand-written underneath) "Boots can eat anywhere they want." ______________________________________________________ A couple just started their Lamaze class and they were given an activity requiring the husband to wear a bag of sand - to give him an idea of what it feels like to be pregnant. The husband stood up and shrugged saying, "This doesn't feel so bad." The instructor then dropped a pen and asked the husband to pick it up. "You want me to pick up the pen as if I were pregnant, the way my wife would do it?" the husband asked. "Exactly," replied the instructor. To the delight of the other husbands, he turned to his wife and said, "Honey, pick up that pen for me and get me a coffee while you are up anyway." ______________________________________________________ Click through for the big picture ______________________________________________________
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______________________________________________________ reported by Don An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Marco Antonio Parilla Jr., 23 Tarpon Springs Florida Fugitive Kills Florida Cop A fugitive trying to evade an arrest warrant shot a Tampa-area police officer and then ran him over early Sunday, killing the officer, police said. Marco Antonio Parilla Jr., 23, crashed his car into a pole and another vehicle after running over Tarpon Springs officer Charles Kondek. Parilla was arrested on suspicion of first- degree murder. The shooting did not appear to have any connection to the ambush killings of two New York police officers a day earlier. Authorities said Kondek responded to a noise call around 2 a.m. at an apartment complex. Parilla was pounding on doors, looking for a neighbor who had "dimed him out" to police, authorities said. When Parilla saw Kondek, he fired multiple rounds at the officer, striking him once above his bullet-proof vest. "We know we have the right guy in custody," Pinellas County Sheriff Bob Gualtieri said. "This guy knew what he was doing, he killed a cop and he needs to be held accountable for that." According to the Florida Department of Corrections, Parilla served more than two years in prison for several offenses, including drug charges, and was released in March. He was listed as a fugitive for violating his probation. It wasn't immediately clear what the violation was. The sheriff said Parilla told investigators that when he saw the officer he "felt like a caged rat" and didn't want to return to prison. "I apologize to the family" of the officer, Parilla told media outlets while being escorted to jail. "That was not my intention." Kondek, 45, had been with the local force for 17 years. Originally from New York, Kondek previously served on the New York City Police Department for more than five years, authorities said. Kondek was the father of six children. Tech Support Pits From: Jim Re: Microslop in emails Dear Webby A good morning to you and hope for a Great Christmas for you. One "little" problem I have with my Eudora. Some of the mail I get is cluttered with ?? and not the quotation marks that should have been there, Ex: The lady says, “What’s it telling you now?” Is there a setting that will change this? Thanks in advance for you help. Jim Dear Jim That is Microslop When people use Microsoft WORD and have it set to use left and right leaning quotes to show they are some kind of secret pervert, then those non-ASCII characters show up as random weirdo symbols called Microslop in emails. Those non-ASCII characters are for printing only, not for email or web pages. There is a setting in WORD to change that, so that it does not use non-ASCII symbols. But they have to click that setting. It's the one about using "Smart Quotes". Nothing you can do on the recipient side. Just realize that the sender is some kind of secret weirdo, or clueless, and go on with life. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Beach Towel To Protect Pillow Hubby has oily skin and, being bald, he has no hair that absorbs at least some of the oil on his scalp. Changing the bed pillow case every day wasn't a big deal but I really didn't like the soiled pillows that became dirty and smelly. I bought several used beach towels at the Thrift Store and made them into pillow cases that I put over the pillow to protect it before slipping on the pretty top pillow case. I still change the top pillow case every day; the underneath towel pillow case is washed once a week and the pillow itself remains clean. I suppose this would work well too for those that have "sleeping sweat head". By Mina2184 [15] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
______________________________________________________ A Sunday School teacher asked her class, "Does anyone know what we mean by sins of omission?" A small girl replied, "Aren't those the sins we should have committed, but didn't?" ______________________________________________________ While a friend and I were visiting Annapolis, we noticed several students on their hands and knees assessing the courtyard with pencils and clipboards in hand. "What are they doing?" I asked our tour guide. "Each year," he replied with a grin, "The upperclassmen ask the freshmen how many bricks it took to finish paving this courtyard." "So what's the answer?" my friend asked him when we were out of earshot of the freshmen. The guide replied, "One."


Today in 
1788 Maryland voted to cede a 100-square-mile area for the 
 seat of the national government. About two-thirds of the area 
 became the District of Columbia. 
1823 The poem "A Visit from St. Nicholas" by Clement C. Moore 
 (" 'Twas the night before Christmas...") was published. 
1834 English architect Joseph Hansom patented his 'safety cab', 
 better known as the Hansom cab. 
1856 Ralph Collier was issued a U.S. patent for the first 
 rotary egg beater with rotating parts. 
1880 Thomas Edison incorporated the Edison Electric Light 
 Company of Europe. 
1888 Following a quarrel with Paul Gauguin, Dutch painter 
 Vincent Van Gogh cut off part of his own earlobe. 
1893 The Engelbert Humperdinck opera "Hansel und Gretel" 
 was first performed, in Weimar, Germany. 
1919 The first ship designed to be used as an ambulance for 
 the transport patients was launched. The hospital ship was 
 named USS Relief and had 515 beds. 
1941 During World War II, American forces on Wake Island 
 surrendered to the Japanese. 
1942 Bob Hope agreed to entertain U.S. airmen in Alaska. 
 It was the first of the traditional Christmas shows. 
1947 John Bardeen, Walter H. Brattain and William Shockley 
 invented the transistor. 
1948 Former Japanese premier Hideki Tojo and six other 
 Japanese war leaders were executed in Tokyo. They had been 
 found guilty of crimes against humanity. 
1953 Soviet secret police chief Lavrenti Beria and six of 
 his associates were shot for treason following a secret trial. 
1954 The Walt Disney movie "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea" 
1965 A 70-mph speed limit was introduced in Britain. 
1968 Eighty-two crewmembers of the U.S. intelligence ship 
 Pueblo were released by North Korea, 11 months after they 
 had been captured. 
1981 NASA approved a plan to continue the Voyager II spacecraft 
 on a trajectory that would take it within 66,000 miles of 
 Uranus on July 24, 1986. 
1986 The experimental airplane Voyager, piloted by Dick Rutan 
 and Jeana Yeager, completed the first non-stop, around-the-
 world flight without refueling as it landed safely at Edwards 
 Air Force Base in California. 
1987 Lynette "Squeaky" Fromme, serving a life sentence for 
 the attempted assassination of U.S. President Ford in 1975, 
 escaped from the Alderson Federal Prison for Women in West 
 Virginia. She was recaptured two days later. 
1989 Ousted Romanian President Nicolae Ceausescu and his wife, 
 Elena, were captured as they were attempting to flee their 
1990 Elections in Yugoslavia ended, leaving four of its six 
 republics with non-Communist governments. 
1995 A fire in Dabwali, India, killed 540 people, including 
 170 children, during a year-end party being held near the 
 children's school. 
1995 The bodies of 16 members of the Solar Temple religious 
 sect were found in a clearing near Grenoble, France. 14 were 
 presumed shot by two people who then committed suicide. 
1997 Terry Nichols was convicted by a Denver jury on charges 
 of conspiracy and involuntary manslaughter in the 1995 
 federal building bombing in Oklahoma City. The bomb killed 
 168 people. 
1998 Guerrillas in south Lebanon fired dozens of rockets at 
 northern Israel.
2014  smiled.

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