Good Morning, ,

Today is Saturday, January 3

Have FUN!

Today's Bonehead Award goes to a
A Floriduh couple, who hid in a museum closet
and thought they were locked in.
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1833 Britain seized control of the Falkland Islands in the 
 South Atlantic. About 150 years later, Argentina seized the 
 islands from the British, but Britain took them back after 
 a 74-day war.
More of what happened on this day in history at History
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I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead --- Mark Twain (1835 - 1910) ______________________________________________________ >From Barbara I have a joke for you. Shortly before our 25th wedding anniversary, my husband sent 25 long-stemmed yellow roses to me at my office. A few days later, I plucked all the petals and dried them. On the night of our anniversary, I spread the petals over the bed and lay on top of them, wearing only a negligee. As Id hoped, I got a reaction from my husband. When he saw me, he exclaimed, Are those potato chips? Barbara ______________________________________________________ Before Linda became engaged, she was quite the beauty, and didn't mind letting her boyfriend know it, too: "A lot of men are gonna be totally miserable when I marry." she told him. "Really?" asked the boyfriend, "And just how many men are you planning to marry?" ______________________________________________________ Thanks to my dad for thgis picture: Click through for the big picture
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Amber Campbell, 24 John Arwood Daytona Beach, Floriduh Florida couple spent days in unlocked closet, thought they were trapped A pair of hapless accused trespassers spent two days in a closet, thinking they were trapped inside. John Arwood and Amber Campbell told police that someone had chased them into the closet at Daytona State College's Marine and Environmental Science Center on Sunday. Once they were inside the janitor's closet, they couldn't get out. But it wasn't until Tuesday that Arwood decided to call 911. When Daytona Beach police arrived, they discovered that the door did not lock. Cops found human feces and suspected drug paraphernalia in the closet, but they didn't find any drugs. Arwood and Campbell were both charged with trespassing. Campbell was also charged with violating her probation. In 2013, she was arrested after escaping a mental health treatment facility, crashing a car and escaping from the back of a police cruiser. Interesting tramp stamp on her throat. "Deep throat for $" According to the Orlando Sentinel, Arwood's record includes five jail sentences in Florida since 2000, with offenses including armed burglary, possession of more than 20 grams of marijuana, and fleeing law enforcement. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Lee Re: Mozbackup Dear Webby Wouldn't it be best to install Thunderbird fresh on new computer and then use Mozbackup to save info on old computer and then transfer that file (large) to new computer. I use Mozbackup in case of loss. Carbonite saves the file for me. Thanks Lee Thanks Lee! That could simplify things for some people! Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Add Ranch Dressing to Mashed Potatoes As old people are wont to do, DH and I sometimes forget to go to the supermarket. Today I wanted mashed potatoes and noticed that there was no butter in the fridge. I got out my bottle of ranch dressing and smushed the bottle so that a good sized blob came out. I then whipped them in the usual manner and they were delicious! By Marty Dick [147]
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
The local priest came across Paddy who had stumbled out of the town tavern. "Paddy," he said, " I'm afraid I'll not be seeing you in Heaven one day." "Really, Father?" slurred Paddy. "What have you done now?" ______________________________________________________ Bidding at a local auction was proceeding furiously when the auctioneer suddenly announced, "A gentleman in this room has lost a wallet containing $10,000. If it is returned, he will pay a reward of $2,000." There was a moment's silence, and then from the back of the room came the cry, "Two thousand five hundred!"

Dianne got her wings December 29

Today in 
1496 References in Leonardo da Vinci notebooks suggested that 
 he tested his flying machine. The test didn't succeed and he 
 didn't try to fly again for several years. 
1521 Pope Leo X excommunicated Martin Luther. 
1777 The Battle of Princeton took place in the War of Independence, 
 in which George Washington defeated the British forces, 
 led by Cornwallis. 
1815 By secret treaty, Austria, Britain, and France formed a 
 defensive alliance against Prusso-Russian plans to solve 
 the Saxon and Polish problems. 
1833 Britain seized control of the Falkland Islands in the 
 South Atlantic. About 150 years later, Argentina seized the 
 islands from the British, but Britain took them back after 
 a 74-day war. 
1868 The Shogunate was abolished in Japan and Meiji dynasty 
 was restored. 
1871 Henry W. Bradley patented oleomargarine. 
1888 The drinking straw was patented by Marvin C. Stone. 
1924 English explorer Howard Carter discovered the sarcophagus 
 of Tutankhamen in the Valley of the Kings, near Luxor, Egypt. 
1925 In Italy, Mussolini announced that he would take 
 dictatorial powers. 
1947 In Trenton, NJ, Al Herrin, passed away at age 92. He 
 had claimed that he had not slept at all during his life. 
1957 The Hamilton Watch Company introduced the first electric watch. 
1959 In the U.S., Alaska became the 49th state. 
1961 The U.S. severed diplomatic relations with Cuba. 
1962 Pope John XXIII excommunicated Cuban prime minister 
 Fidel Castro. 
1967 Jack Ruby died in a Dallas, TX, hospital. 
1980 Conservationist Joy Adamson, author of "Born Free," was 
 killed in northern Kenya by a servant. 
1990 Ousted Panamanian leader Manuel Noriega surrendered to 
 U.S. forces, 10 days after taking refuge in the Vatican's 
 diplomatic mission. 
1993 U.S. President George H.W. Bush and Russian President 
 Boris Yeltsin signed the second Strategic Arms Reduction 
 Treaty (START) in Moscow. 
1998 China announced that it would spend $27.7 billion to 
 fight erosion and pollution in the Yangtze and Yellow river 
1999 Israeli authorities detained, and later expelled, 14 
 members of Concerned Christians. Israili officials claimed 
 that the Denver, CO-based cult was plotting violence in 
 Jerusalem to bring about the Second Coming of Christ. 
2000 Charles M. Schulz's final original daily comic strip 
 appeared in newspapers. 
2001 The ATF (Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms) charged 
 the "Texas 7" with weapons violations. An autopsy showed 
 that Aubrey Hawkins, killed by the convicts, had been shot 
 11 times and run over with a vehicle. 
2004 NASA's Spirit rover landed on Mars. The craft was able 
 to send back black and white images three hours after landing.

2015  smiled.

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