Letter from Microsoft 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Tuesday, June 9

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a
Baton Rouge daycare workers arrested because 
Toddler they left in hot vehicle died;
Details at Boneheads

Today in
1534 Jacques Cartier became the first to sail into the river 
 he named Saint Lawrence. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History
______________________________________________________
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America had often been discovered before Columbus, but it had always been hushed up. --- Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900) ______________________________________________________ The crowded cafeteria sported a large sign reading: "Watch Your Hat And Overcoat." Ira sure did. He kept turning every minute, almost choking over his food. His pal, Abraham, kept on eating, without thought of his own coat on the hook. Finally Abraham said, "Ira, you Schmuck...stop watching our overcoats." "I'm only watching mine," replied Ira. "Yours has been gone for over half an hour." ______________________________________________________ Bob was riding a Harley on the highway and is pulled up by a police officer, also on a bike. The officer says, "Pull over", and the driver pulls over to the side of the road. Bob says, "I'm sorry, officer, was I speeding?". The police officer says, "No, mate, but your wife fell off a couple of miles back". Bob replies, "Oh, that explains it. I thought I was going deaf." ______________________________________________________
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Shelia Newman, 47, April Wright, 26, Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Toddler left in hot vehicle died; Baton Rouge daycare workers arrested Two Baton Rouge daycare workers were arrested on suspicion of negligent homicide Friday after a 22-month-old girl was left in a hot vehicle for about two hours and died, Baton Rouge Police said. The child was identified as Angel Green, of the 6500 block of Hanks Drive. The two women who were arrested were 47-year-old Shelia Newman, of the 6300 block of Prescott Road, and 26-year- old April Wright, of the 2500 block of Badley Road. Newman owns the unlicensed daycare at 6345 Prescott Road, and Wright is an employee, police said. According to affidavits of probable cause, Wright and Newman used a daycare van to take 16 children, including Angel, to get lunch at Jehovah Ministry in Baton Rouge. When they got back, the women thought they had all of the children out of the vehicle but never checked it, police said. Then, Newman went to pick up two more children, and took them out of the van, apparently missing Angel a second time. When the children woke up from their naps, Wright realized Angel was missing, and found her unresponsive in the vehicle. Police said Angel may have been in the car for about two hours, and while the coroner's office will determine the cause of death, it's likely she overheated. Staff at the hospital where Angel was taken told police her body temperature was 108 degrees. Newman also told Wright to lie to police about where Angel was found, police said. According to the affidavit, Newman told her to say Angel was found in the backyard, and to pour water on the back steps to make it look like she had cleaned up vomit. Newman was booked on suspicion of obstruction of justice as well as negligent homicide, police said. Newman had recently had her daycare license revoked for having too few attendants for the number of children at the daycare, according to the affidavit.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Penny Re: Letter from Microsoft Dear Webby Just looked in my e-mail to find a message fro Microsoft, "Updates to our terms of use and privacy statement." I haven't opened it yet. Anymore you never REALLY know if it's legit or not. What's your opinion??? Hope you're enjoying your summer so far. Mon. June 1st I flew home from Washington D.C. and it was 96 at 1:30 p.m ! Sure was glad to get away from that. Only to arrive home in Ohio to a cloudy 55. It was just a 46 minute flight so it was quite a shock to the system. lol Thanks Penny Dear Penny I have not received a letter like that, or if I did, then MailWasher recognized it as a scam and murdered it in the dark, unseen by any human. As far as Microsoft is concerned, you have no rights and no recourse anyway. What is the point reading about it? There is nothing you can do if you disagree with the edict from the throne. Here it was nice and hot today. 22 degrees in the shade on the North side of the house, 32 degrees on the West side in the sun. OOOPS, forgot you aren't independent of the British Imperial Empire yet. Those numbers are in post-Napoleonic metric. In your quaint British Imperial units, that would be 72 degrees on the North side, 90 degrees on the West side. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ The preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. He grabbed George by the hand and pulled him aside. The Pastor said to him, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!" My friend replied, "I'm already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor." The Pastor questioned, "How come I don't see you except at Christmas and your Anniversary?" He whispered back, "I'm in the secret service." ______________________________________________________ A lady dropped her handbag in the bustle of weekend shopping. An honest, little boy noticed her drop the handbag, so he picked it up and returned it to her. The lady looked into her handbag and commented, "Hmm.... That's funny. When I lost my bag there was a $20 bill in it. Now there are twenty $1 bills." The boy quickly replied, "That's right, lady. The last time I found a purse, the owner didn't have any change for a reward." _________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Use Broom to Clean Popcorn Ceiling I dust my popcorn ceiling by using a broom. Yes, it does cause some particles to fall but not if you dust/broom it lightly. By herrington_mary [1] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ The teacher advised the class to start the day with the Pledge of Allegiance, and instructed them to put their right hands over their hearts and repeat after him. He looked around the room as he started the recitation, "I pledge allegiance to the flag..." When his eyes fell on Little Johnny, he noticed his hand over the right cheek of his buttocks. "Little Johnny, I will not continue till you put your hand over your heart." Little Johnny replied, "It is over my heart." After several attempts to get Little Johnny to put his hand over his heart, the teacher asked, "Why do you think that is your heart?" "Because, every time my Grandma comes to visit, she picks me up, pats me here, and says, 'Bless your little heart,' and my Grandma wouldn't lie." _____________________________________________________ Bobby was stark naked in front of his open window, doing his morning aerobics. His wife entered the room and shouted, "Bobby, you fool, draw those curtains! I don't want the neighbors to think that I married you for your money!" ____________________________________________________
Interesting wildlife photos from around the world.

Today in 
1064 Coimbra, Portugal fell to Ferdinand, the King of Castile.
1534 Jacques Cartier became the first to sail into the river 
 he named Saint Lawrence. 
1790 John Barry copyrighted "Philadelphia Spelling Book." It 
 was the first American book to be copyrighted. 
1790 Civil war broke out in Martinique. 
1860 The Ms. Ann Stevens book "Malaeska, the Indian Wife of 
 the White Hunter" was offered for sale for a dime. It was 
 the first published "dime novel." 
1923 Bulgaria's government was overthrown by the military. 
1931 Robert H. Goddard patented a rocket-fueled aircraft 
 design. 
1934 Donald Duck made his debut in the Silly Symphonies cartoon 
 "The Wise Little Hen." 
1940 Norway surrendered to the Nazis during World War II. 
1943 The withholding tax on payrolls was authorized by the 
 U.S. Congress. 
1945 Japanese Premier Kantaro Suzuki declared that Japan 
 would fight to the last rather than accept unconditional 
 surrender. 
1959 The first ballistic missile carrying submarine, the 
 USS George Washington, was launched. 
1978 Leaders of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day 
 Saints struck down a 148-year-old policy of excluding black 
 men from the Mormon priesthood. 
1980 Richard Pryor was severely burned by a "free-base" 
 mixture that exploded. He was hospitalized more than two 
 months. 
1985 Thomas Sutherland, an American educator, was kidnapped 
 in Lebanon. He was not released until November 1991. 
1986 The Rogers Commission released a report on the Challenger 
 disaster. The report explained that the spacecraft blew up 
 as a result of a failure in a solid rocket booster joint, 
 mainly because they wanted to change booster suppliers. 
1999 NATO and Yugoslavia signed a peace agreement over Kosovo. 
2000 The U.S. House of Representatives voted to repeal gift and 
 estate taxes. The bill called for the taxes to be phased out 
 over 10 years. 
2011 The world's first artificial organ transplant was performed. 
 It was an artificial windpipe coated with stem cells. 
2015  smiled.


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