Netbook screen flipped 90 degrees 

Good Morning, ,
Today is Saturday, August 15

Thank you, Larry !!

When I looked to the East this morning to see what the 
weather was going to be like, the sun was just peeking
over a roof. It was blood red changing to fire engine red
as it quickly grew in size. Smoke is still fairly thick.
They must have some huge fires in BC to produce that 
much smoke.

Have FUN!
DerWebby With this one YOU get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
______________________________________________________ Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Floriduh robber who tried to rob the wrong congregation and got thumped by the pastor until the cops rescued him. Details at Boneheads Today in 1914 The Panama Canal was officially opened to commercial traffic as an American ship sailed from the Atlantic to the Pacific Ocean. The first vessel to pass through the canal was the American cargo and passenger ship SS Ancon. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ No one has ever had an idea in a dress suit. --- Sir Frederick G. Banting (1891 - 1941) The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy. --- Sam Levenson A little nonsense now and then, is cherished by the wisest men. --- Roald Dahl ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ A young Easterner decides to make his fortune in the oil business, so he packs up and heads for Texas. Once there, he realizes he'll need money to get started, so he goes to the local bank. "I've come to ask for a loan," the young man says. "Well," says the banker, "how much do you need?" "How much do you have?" the young man answers ______________________________________________________ A man complains to a friend, "I can't take it anymore." "What's wrong?" his concerned friend asks. "It's my wife. Every time we have an argument, she gets historical!" "You mean hystErical," his friend said, chuckling. "No, I mean HISTORICAL," the man insists. "Every argument we have, she interrupts with: "But, before we got married, you told me you loved me..." ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Lillemor for sending this picture: It took Greg McCown 7 years to catch the perfect picture. ______________________________________________________ A man passed out in a dead faint as he came out of his front door onto the porch. Someone called 911. When the paramedics arrived, they helped him regain consciousness and asked if he knew what caused him to faint. "It was enough to make anybody faint," he said. "My son asked me for the keys to the garage, and instead of driving the car out, he came out with the LAWN MOWER!" ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by John Grace, 21, Melbourne, Floriduh
Florida robber tackled by pastor and son A 21-year-old man was arrested on Sunday after he allegedly tried to rob a Florida church congregation during the sermon. Pastor Les Snodgrass was delivering a sermon entitled "The Value of Life," when John Grace drew a weapon and told everyone to get on the ground and hand over their money, Snodgrass said. "He pulled a gun from his bag and put [it] up to my mother's head," Snodgrass told WKMG. Snodgrass said he tried to divert Grace's attention from his mother to himself. After a few moments, he got close enough to spring into action. "I just pushed against the wall with all my might," he said. "I had him by the shoulders, and as soon as I did that, my son leapt from the platform into the air and pounced on him. He punched him in the head a few times." They contined until police showed up. The weapon that Grace had was an "airsoft BB gun realistically modeled after a Sig Sauer pistol," WTSP reports. He also had a large knife, according to police. Snodgrass said that Grace had visited the Door Christian Fellowship Church in Melbourne sporadically over the previous few years, but was not a regular congregant. Grace is charged with robbery, aggravated assault, and false imprisonment, Brevard County records show.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Ginger Re: Netbook screen flipped Dear Webby, Dear Webby, I need your help. I was deleting files from a netbook I plan to donate to the local hospital for inpatients to use during longer stays, and I went to hit "CTRL" "ALT" and "DELETE" (forgetting that the Delete button is at the top of the keyboard instead of the bottom....and I hit "END". Now the screen is sideways and I can't figure out how get it back horizontal! Can you help me? Ginger Dear Ginger Usually that is done by a Trojan like Sub7 Do a thorough malware scan with a reputable anti-malware program like McAfee. It's 50% off anyway at You can also try CTRL ALT and the up / down arrows, CTRL ALT PageUp, CTRL ALT PageDown, CTRL ALT HOME Those commands don't normally work on a desktop, but theoretically work on netbooks. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ A travel agent looked up from his desk to see an older lady and an older gentleman peering in the shop window at the posters showing the glamorous destinations around the world. The agent had had a good week and the dejected couple looking in the window gave him a rare feeling of generosity. He called them into his shop and said, "I know that on your pension you could never hope to have a holiday, so I am sending you off to a fabulous resort at my expense, and I won't take no for an answer." He took them inside and asked his secretary to write two flight tickets and book a room in a five star hotel. They, as can be expected, gladly accepted, and were on their way. About a month later the little lady came in to his shop. "And how did you like your holiday?" he asked eagerly. "The flight was exciting and the room was lovely," she said. "I've come to thank you. But, one thing puzzled me. Who was that old guy I had to share the room and bed with?" ______________________________________________________ A girl walked up to the information desk in a hospital and asked to see the "upturn". "I think you mean the 'intern', don't you?" asked the nurse on duty. "Whatever," said the girl. "I want to have a contamination." "You mean 'examination,'" the nurse corrected her. "Whatever, I want to go to the 'fraternity ward,' anyway." "I'm sure you mean the maternity ward." To which the girl replied: "Upturn, intern; contamination, examination, fraternity, maternity.... what's the difference? All I know is I haven't demonstrated in two months, and I think I'm stagnant." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Pill Organizer for Beads and Findings I had a few unused pill organizers laying around the house and almost threw them out. Until it dawned on me that their little compartments are perfect for storing small beads and findings. The lids snap securely so I don't have to worry about them spilling. I found that the large organizer worked best for beads, while the smaller one was perfect for the findings. Being clears means I don't even have to label them, although I might later. By lalala... [670] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Two priests were riding very fast on a motorcycle. They were stopped promptly by a policeman, who said, "What do you think you are doing? You were going mighty fast there, Father." The priest says, "We were just taking the bike for a spin...see how it runs." The policeman shakes his head. "I am going to have to give you a ticket. Driving like that isn't safe. What if you have an accident?" The priests say, "Don't worry, my son. Jesus is with us." The policeman says, "In that case, I have to book you. Three on a motorcycle falls under reckless driving." ___________________________________________________

____________________________________________________ A preacher of the old school is describing the events of Judgment Day to his congregation. "Oh, my friends," he intones, "imagine the suffering of the sinners as they find themselves cast into the outer darkness, removed from the presence of the Lord and given to eternal flames. My friends, at such a time there will be weeping, wailing and a great gnashing of teeth." At that point, one of the elders of the congregation interrupts to say, "But Reverend, what if one of those hopeless sinners is old and has no teeth?" The preacher crashes his fist on the pulpit. "My friends," he thundered, "the Lord is not put out by details. Rest assured, teeth will be provided." ____________________________________________________
These people are fast and efficient cleaning the "bullet train."

Today in 
1057 Macbeth, the King of Scotland, was killed by the son of King Duncan.
1848 The dental chair was patented by M. Waldo Hanchett. 
1877 Thomas Edison wrote to the president of the Telegraph Company in 
 Pittsburgh, PA. The letter stated that the word, "hello" would be a 
 more appropriate greeting than "ahoy" when answering the telephone. 
1911 The product Crisco was introduced by Procter & Gamble Company. 
1914 The Panama Canal was officially opened to commercial traffic as 
 an American ship sailed from the Atlantic to the Pacific Ocean. The 
 first vessel to pass through the canal was the American cargo and 
 passenger ship SS Ancon. 
1918 Diplomatic ties between the U.S. and Russia were severed. 
1935 Will Rogers and Wiley Post were killed in an airplane crash near 
 Point Barrow, AK. 
1943 Because of his special talent to use food scraps in both unusual 
 and appetizing recipes, the U.S. War Department awarded Sgt. Edward 
 Dzuba the Legion of Merit. 
1944 The Allied forces of World War II landed in southern France. 
1945 The Allies proclaimed V-J Day a day after Japan agreed to 
 surrender unconditionally. 
1947 India became independent from Britain and was divided into the 
 countries of India and Pakistan. India had been under British rule
 about 200 years. 
1948 The Republic of Korea was proclaimed. 
1949 In San Francisco, a stunt leap off the Golden Gate Bridge was 
 performed for the first time. 
1961 East German workers began construction of the Berlin Wall. 
1971 U.S. President Nixon announced a 90-day freeze on wages, 
 rents and prices. 
1986 The U.S. Senate approved a package of economic sanctions against 
 South Africa. The ban included the importing of steel, uranium, 
 textiles, coal, and produce from South Africa. 
1992 Vietnam blamed Hollywood for creating the "myth" concerning the 
 issue of U.S. servicemen still being held prisoner in Indochina. 
1997 The U.S. Justice Department decided not to prosecute FBI officials 
 in connection with the deadly 1992 Ruby Ridge siege in Idaho. The 
 investigation dealt with an alleged cover-up. 
2000 A group of 100 people from North Korea arrived in South Korea 
 for temporary reunions with relatives they had not seen for half a 
 century. Also, a group of 100 South Koreans visited the North. 
2001 Astronomers announced the discovery of the first solar system 
 outside our own. They had discovered two planets orbiting a star 
 in the Big Dipper. 
2011 Google announced that it would acquire Motorola Mobility for 
 $12.5 billion. 
2015  smiled.

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