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Today is Saturday, September 12

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______________________________________________________ Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Connecticut man caught driving 112 Mph en route to court to answer prior speeding ticket Details at Boneheads Today, September 12, in 1873 The first practical typewriter was sold to customers. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ If the human mind was simple enough to understand, we'd be too simple to understand it. --- Emerson Pugh Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter because nobody listens. --- Nick Diamos "Now there's an updated version of the three R's: Readin', 'Remote control handling', and Replacin' the batteries in the remote control." --- Socratex ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ The middle-aged man was shuffling along, bent over at the waist, as his wife helped him into the doctor's waiting room. A woman in the office viewed the scene in sympathy. "Arthritis with complications?" she asked. The wife shook her head, "Noooo,...she explained, "he tried to move the wet laundry from the washer into the dryer all by himself." ______________________________________________________ Son: "Here's my report card, Dad, along with one of your old ones I found in the attic." Dad: "Well, Son, you're right. Your report card isn't any better than mine was. I guess the only fair thing to do is give you exactly the same as what my father gave me when I brought that one home. ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Janina for her 9/11 picture: Cape May, NJ lighthouse, with flags at half mast for 9/11 ______________________________________________________ A very dirty, grubby little boy came in from playing in the yard and asked his mother, "Who am I?" Ready to play the game, she said, "I don't know! Who are you?" "WOW!" cried the boy. "Mrs. Johnson was right! She said I am so dirty, my own mother wouldn't recognize me!" ______________________________________________________
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Reported by Noella An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Seth Tichenor, 33, Vermont, Connecticut
Connecticut man caught driving 112 Mph en route to court to answer prior speeding ticket A Connecticut man on his way to court to “take care of a speeding ticket” was arrested yesterday after cops clocked his car going 112 miles an hour, according to police. Seth Tichenor, 33, was arrested Wednesday afternoon by Vermont State Police officers who stopped his car on Interstate 89. Tichenor, seen in the mug shot, was pulled over after other drivers called 911 to report a “vehicle traveling in excess of 100 mph and weaving in and out of traffic.” Cops subsequently clocked Tichenor’s car going nearly 50 miles above the road's posted 65 mph limit. Tichenor, who “was headed to traffic court to take care of a speeding ticket,” was busted for negligent driving and speeding, police reported. He is scheduled for an October 27 court appearance. ----------------- I used to drive like that, but outgrew it.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Moe Re: Revo Uninstaller Dear Webby, Think you right about uninstalling software. But Revo has 3 or 4 levels. I use the one above Safe mode. Get more registry entries to delete. Then can compact the Registry. Revo will usually use the target System's own uninstall as first step. Funny when the deleted system warns user it will no longer work. But one important step in Revo is to ignore the old system's Reboot Now display. Must decline and completete the Revo Uninstall process that rids PC of the rest of the bits. And pieces. And run CrapCleaner to check for more Registry junk. Plus usually defrag the disk afterwards. But prior to re-installations. Moe Thanks Moe! Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Two very successful psychoanalysts occupied offices in the same building. One was 40 years old, the other over 70. They rode on the elevator together at the end of an unbearably hot, sticky day. The younger man was completely done in, and he noted with some resentment that his senior was fresh as a daisy. "I don't understand," he marveled, "how you can listen to complaining patients from morning 'til night, on a day like this, and still look so spry and un- bothered when it's over?" The older analyst replied:"Sorry, I can't hear a thing. The battery in my hearing aid went dead a few years ago." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com DIY Workout Foam Roller Foam rollers are all the rage now for after workout muscle pain relief, therapy, and injury prevention. I bought mine online for around $30 and cannot be without it. However, I'm not willing to pay that price over and over again every time I travel and don't want to carry it around with me. Here's how to make your own for under $5. Approximate Time: 3 minutes Yield: 1 foam roller Supplies: 1 6 inch x 2 foot PVC pipe 1 towel or yoga mat 2 large rubberbands Steps: Take your towel or yoga mat and carefully roll it around the PVC pipe on the floor. Make sure there are no wrinkles. Secure the towel or mat on to the pipe with your two large rubber bands. The thicker the towel or mat, the more gentle it will be on your muscles. If you want a gentle massage, keep adding layers of fabric. Get on and roll away! By attosa [119] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ A professor was giving a lecture on company slogans in a college advertising and marketing class. "Joe," he asked, "which company has the slogan, 'Come fly the friendly skies'?" "United." Joe answered. "Brenda, can you tell me which company has the slogan, "Don't leave home without it?" Brenda answered the correct credit card company with no difficulty. "Now John, Tell me which company uses the slogan, 'Just do it'?" John answered, "Mom." ___________________________________________________

Slinningsbålet 2010 Bonfire World record!
____________________________________________________ Mrs. Jones is having her house painted, and her husband comes home from work and leans against the freshly painted wall.The next day, she says to the painter, "You wanna see where my husband put his hand last night? "He sighs and says, "Look, lady, I got a tough day's work ahead of me. Why don't you just make us a cup of tea?" ____________________________________________________
What a beautiful library in Austria!

Today, Sept 12, in
1609 English explorer Henry Hudson sailed down what is now 
 known as the Hudson River. 
1814 During the War of 1812, the Battle of North Point was 
 fought in Maryland. 
1873 The first practical typewriter was sold to customers. 
1878 Patent litigation involving the Bell Telephone Company 
 against Western Union Telegraph Company and Elisha Gray 
 began. The issues were over various telephone patents. 
1914 The first battle of Marne ended when the allied forces 
 stopped the German offensive in France. 
1916 Adelina and August Van Buren finished the first successful 
 transcontinental motorcycle tour to be attempted by two women. 
 They started in New York City on July 5, 1916. 
1918 During World War I, At the Battle of St. Mihiel, U.S. Army 
 personnel operate tanks for the first time. The tanks were 
1922 The Episcopal Church removed the word "Obey" from the 
 bride's section of wedding vows. 
1938 In a speech, Adolf Hitler demanded self-determination for 
 the Sudeten Germans in Czechoslovakia. 
1940 The Lascaux paintings were discovered in France. The cave 
 paintings were 17,000 years old and were some of the best 
 examples of art from the Paleolithic period. 
1943 During World War II, Benito Mussolini was taken by German 
 paratroopers from the Italian government that was holding him. 
1944 U.S. Army troops entered Germany, near Trier, for the 
 first time during World War II. 
1953 U.S. Senator John F. Kennedy married Jacqueline Lee Bouvier. 
1953 Nikita Krushchev was elected as the first secretary of the 
 Communist Party of the Soviet Union. 
1954 "Lassie" made its television debut on CBS. The last show aired 
 on September 12, 1971. 
1963 The last episode of "Leave it to Beaver" was aired. The show 
 had debuted on October 4, 1957. 
1974 Violence occurred on the opening day of classes in Boston, MA, 
 due opposition to court-ordered school "busing." 
1974 Emperor Haile Selassie was taken out of power by Ethiopia's 
 military after ruling for 58 years. 
1977 South African anti-apartheid activist Stephen Biko died at the 
 age of 30. The student leader died while in police custody which 
 triggered an international outcry. 
1983 Arnold Schwarzenegger became a U.S. citizen. He had emigrated 
 from Austria 14 years earlier. 
1984 Michael Jordan signed a seven-year contract to play basketball 
 with the Chicago Bulls. 
1991 The space shuttle Discovery took off on a mission to deploy an 
 observatory that was to study the Earth's ozone layer. 
1992 Police in Peru captured Shining Path founder Abimael Guzman. 
2009 Steve Jobs announced that Apple's iTunes had 88% of the legal 
 U.S. music download market.
2015  smiled.

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