Does Defraggler erase programs? 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Saturday, September 26.

Check out the moon!
It is gorgeous. Probably best of the year.
It is not the sharpest, but the grain dust in the air
mellows it just a bit, and makes it look even bigger.

Have FUN!
DearWebby

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Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Kansas drunk, who stole a combine and went traveling. Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, September 26, in 1962 "The Beverly Hillbillies" premiered on CBS-TV. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain - and most fools do. --- Dale Carnegie "I should warn you that underneath these clothes I'm wearing boxer shorts and I know how to use them." --- Robert Orben ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ When I found this recipe, I thought it would be perfect for people like me, who are not sure how to tell when poultry is cooked thoroughly but not dried out. Give this a try. BAKED STUFFED CHICKEN 6-7 lb. chicken 1 cup melted butter 1 cup stuffing 1 cup uncooked popcorn salt/pepper to taste small plastic bag and duck tape Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Brush chicken well with melted butter, salt and pepper. Fill cavity with stuffing. Put the popcorn into a small heavy duty plastic bag and seal thoroughly with duck tape. Tape up the chest opening of the chicken with duck tape. Place in baking pan with the neck end toward the front (door) of the oven. Listen for popping sounds. When the chicken blows the oven door open and the chicken flies across the kitchen, it is done. And, you thought I couldn't cook. ______________________________________________________ Walking up to a department store's fabric counter, a pretty girl asked: "I want to buy this material for a new dress. How much does it cost?" "Only a kiss a yard, " replied the smirking male clerk. "That's fine," replied the girl. "I'll take ten yards." With expectation and anticipation written all over his face, the clerk hurriedly measured out and wrapped the cloth, then held it out teasingly. The girl snapped up the package and pointed to a little old lady standing beside her. "Grandma is really looking forward to pay the bill," she smiled. ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ A 6 year old girl went to her dad, who was working in the yard. She asked him, "Daddy, what is sex?" The father was surprised that she would ask such a question, but decides that if she is old enough to ask the question, then she is old enough to get a straight answer. He proceeded to tell her all about the "birds and the bees". When he finished explaining, the little girl was looking at him with her mouth hanging open. The father asked her, "Why did you ask this question?" The little girl replied, "Mom told me to tell you that dinner would be ready in just a couple of secs." ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

Thanks to Don for reporting this bonehead! An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Kenneth M. Lamb Jr., 37, Ellinwood, Kansas
Kansas drunk stole a combine and went traveling. ELLINWOOD, Kansas – Around 9:46 p.m. Tuesday evening, officers were called to the area of Northeast 10 Road and Northeast 120 Ave near Ellinwood. When they arrived on scene, they found an abandoned vehicle in the roadway. It was located and impounded by deputies. Shortly after, calls came in saying someone was driving a combine just East of Ellinwood in a reckless manner. The combine was reported weaving from ditch to ditch on U.S. 56 highway. It struck a guy wire and caused damage to power poles near the intersection of Southeast 10 Road and U.S. 56 Highway. It then continued West and entered the city of Ellinwood around 10:47 p.m. The driver drove through a residential neighborhood, striking several power poles and a 2005 Cheverolet pickup truck parked on the road. The pickup truck sustained extensive damage and the 8-row combine header was torn from the combine. An Ellinwood police officer attempted to contact the driver around 10:52 p.m. While doing so, the driver put the machine in reverse and rammed the Ellinwood police car. The combine driver fled the scene and a chase ensued. The combine then proceeded down several more side streets and drove South out of town on the county blacktop. The combine was all over the road, traveling with no lights. A sheriff’s deputy was able to get in front of the suspect and set a roadblock just South of the Arkansas River bridge. The suspect rammed the deputy’s patrol car, dragging it a considerable distance, causing extensive damage and disabling the unit. The deputy and Ellinwood officer fired approximately 18 rounds at the combine in an effort to disable it. The driver was taken from the implement and arrested. The driver was identified as Kenneth M. Lamb Jr., 37 of Ellinwood. The combine was stolen near the area where Lamb’s vehicle was found abandoned in the roadway. Lamb was arrested and booked for aggravated assault on a law enforcement officer, felony theft, felony criminal damage to property, and reckless driving. The case is still under investigation. More charges will probably be added, for example DUI.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: DJ Re: Does Defraggler erase programs? Dear Webby, does the defraggler erase all your programs? DJ Dear DJ No, it doesn't. It offers to dump the recycle bin to make some elbow room, but it doesn't delete programs or anything else, that is not already in the Recycle Bin. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Neville the Aborigine had been out of work for a long time, and when he was offered the job at the council as a garbage collector he decided to take it up. On his first day things were going great until he arrived at one house and noticed there was no wheelie bin out the front. Neville thought to himself, "I wanna do a good job and not get fired from here but if they find out I missed one house then I will get fired." So he went up to the door and knocked on it. To his surprise it was a fellow Aborigine who answered. Neville breathed a sigh of relief and said to the other bloke, "Where's ya bin?" The man replied, "I bin on 'olidays," Neville then said, "Na, maite, where's ya BIN?" "I bin on 'olidays I tell ya," was the reply. Neville, slightly frustrated, says, "Na, ya blimey idiot. Where's ya Wheelie Bin?" The other bloke looked round to see who might be listening. "Well," he said. "I weally bin in jail but I'm tellin' everyone I bin on 'olidays, aiy!" ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Easiest Dishwasher Magnet This is the easiest dishwasher magnet to make and will last for years. Take a clean plastic lid (I used an icing lid) and cut the edge off. Write "clean" on one side and "dirty" on the other with a Sharpie marker. Use stick-on magnets with a really strong adhesive. Stick one on one side and one on the other. That's it, you're done. By Abigail A. [12] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Soon after our last child left home for college, my husband was resting next to me on the couch with his head in my lap. I carefully removed his glasses. "You know, honey," I said sweetly, "Without your glasses, you look like the same handsome young man I married." "Honey," he replied with a grin, "Without my glasses, you still look pretty good too!" ___________________________________________________

The Page Turner
____________________________________________________ They were burying Irish Pat today and the priest was explaining to the congregation that before they could put Pat to rest, someone had to get up and say something nice about Pat, even though Pat was a womanizer, a drunk and a fighter. No one got up. So the priest got up again and said,"Maybe I didn't explain me-self properly. Before we can put Paddy in his grave, one of us MUST get up and say something nice about the man.It's our duty as Irishmen and Catholics." So as the priest sat down again, Little Murphy in the back pew got up, cleared his throat, and with his porkpie hat in his hand said, "His sister was worse!". ____________________________________________________
The beautiful and talented Ana Rucner performs Storm by Vivaldi in the beautiful Plitvice Lakes National Park in Croatia.

Today, Sept 26, in
1777 Philadelphia was occupied by British troops during 
 the American Revolutionary War. 
1908 Ed Eulbach of the Chicago Cubs became the first 
 baseball player to pitch both games of a doubleheader and 
 win both with shutouts. 
1908 In "The Saturday Evening Post" an ad for the Edison 
 Phonograph appeared. 
1918 During World War I, the Meuse-Argonne offensive against 
 the Germans began. It was the final Allied offensive on the 
 western front. 
1950 U.N. troops recaptured the South Korean capital of Seoul 
 from the North Koreans during the Korean Conflict. 
1955 The New York Stock Exchange suffered its worst decline 
 since 1929 when the word was released concerning U.S. President 
 Eisenhower's heart attack. 
1960 The first televised debate between presidential candidates 
 Richard M. Nixon and John F. Kennedy took place in Chicago, IL. 
1962 "The Beverly Hillbillies" premiered on CBS-TV. 
1964 "Gilligan's Island" premiered on CBS-TV. The show aired 
 for the last time on September 4, 1967. 
1969 "The Brady Bunch" series premiered on ABC-TV. 
1980 The Cuban government abruptly closed Mariel Harbor to end 
 the freedom flotilla of Cuban refugees that began the previous 
 April. 
1981 The Boeing 767 made its maiden flight in Everett, WA. 
1985 Shamu was born at Sea World in Orlando, FL. Shamu was the 
 first killer whale to survive being born in captivity. 
1986 The episode of "Dallas" that had Bobby Ewing returning 
 from the dead was aired. 
1991 Four men and four women began their two-year stay inside 
 the "Biosphere II." The project was intended to develop 
 technology for future space colonies. The project was 
 cancelled in 1993 when they got caught ordering pizzas.
1996 Shannon Lucid returned to Earth after being in space 
 for 188 days. she set a time record for a U.S. astronaut 
 in space and in the world for time spent by a woman in 
 space. 
2000 The U.S. House of Representatives passed the Born-Alive 
 Infants Protection Act. The act states that an infant would 
 be considered to have been born alive if he or she is 
 completely extracted or expelled from the mother and breathes 
 and has a beating heart and definite movement of the 
 voluntary muscles. 
2001 In Kabul, Afghanistan, the abandoned U.S. Embassy was 
 stormed by protesters. It was the largest anti-Amercian 
 protest since the terror attacks on New York City and 
 Washington, DC, on September 11. 
2001 Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat and Israeli Foreign 
 Minister Shimon Peres announced plans to formalize a 
 cease-fire and end a year of fighting in the region. 
2006 Facebook was openened to everyone at least 13 years 
 or older with a valid email address. 
2015  smiled.


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