Safe download locations 

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Today is Saturday, October 3

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Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Floriduh woman, who was arrested after her 1 year old son drinks her liquid methadone Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 3, in 1929 The Kingdom of Serbs, Croats and Slovenes officially changed its name to the Kingdom of Yugoslavia. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ The more things change, the more they remain... insane. --- Michael Fry and T. Lewis Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't, they'd be married too. --- H. L. Mencken ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Ronnie McInnis walked into a dentist's office and asked how much it would cost to extract a wisdom tooth. "That'll be $80," the dentist said. "That's ridiculous," Ronnie spat. "Isn't there a cheaper way?" "Well," the dentist said, "if I don't use an anaesthetic, I can knock it down to $60." "That's still too expensive," the man whined. "Okay," the dentist countered, "if I save on anaesthetic and simply rip the tooth out with extraction pliers, I could probably get away with charging $20." "Nope," moaned the man. "It's still too much." "Hmmm," the dentist pondered, scratching his head. "If I let one of my students do it for the experience, I suppose I could charge you just $10." "Marvellous," the man beamed. "Could you book my wife for 5:30 next Friday, after she gets off work?" ______________________________________________________ A father, who worked away from home all week, always made a special effort with his family at the weekends. Every Sunday morning he would take his 7 year old daughter out for a drive in the car. One particular Sunday however, he had a bad cold that he really didn't feel like driving at all. Luckily, his wife came to the rescue and decided that for this Sunday she would take their daughter out. They returned just before lunch and the little girl ran upstairs to see her father. "Well" the father asked, "did you enjoy your ride with Mommy?" "Oh yes Daddy" the girl replied, "and do you know what.......we didn't see a single bastid or dingbat, 'cause Mommy was doing the dingbat stuff herself and scared them all away!" ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Noella for sending this picture of her son Charlie and his dog Cooper, taken by Melanie, her DIL in 2012 Good Dog! ______________________________________________________
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Thanks to Noella for reporting this bonehead! An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Anna Highland, 27, Fort Myers, Floriduh
Floriduh woman arrested after her 1 year old son drinks her liquid methadone A Fort Myers toddler suffered brain damage after drinking his mother's prescription liquid methadone. A two-week investigation led to the arrest of Anna Highland for neglect of the 13-month-old, who is now in the custody of the Department of Children and Families -- along with a foster child who was also in the home. The 13-month-old is also suffering from partial blindness and is no longer able to crawl. Liquid methadone is often used to help heroin addicts because of the length of time it remains in the body. A Lee County Sheriff's Office arrest report indicates that's why Highland had the prescription. A Cape Coral doctor, Timothy Dougherty, said the drug can be deadly in children. The report says that Highland left it within reach of her son. When she found it on the ground near him, she called for her mother to come home but didn't call 911 until several hours later when the boy didn't wake from a nap. Highland paid her bond and is expected to be released from jail.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Edith Re: Safe download locations Dear Webby How can one tell if a download location is safe? And what do I do if I get a warning from McAfee? Edith Dear Edith Google for the program you want. Usually the company that makes it, has a site. That is always the best location. If a program is hosted by a mirror site, only use the mirror listed on the program maker's site. Many popular programs are also listed on dubious mirrors and locations. Avoid those. Some mirror sites, that used to be good, like for example, are heavily contaminated and best avoided. They don't check what they host and any crook can upload contaminated garbage. Tucows is still pretty good. They check a lot of the stuff that they list. Personally, I avoid publicly hosted programs. If a company can't afford $12 per year for a domain name and $10 a month for hosting, then they can't really be any good. If you do download from a faker, and McAfee throws up the big, red "WHOA!" screen, cancel the download, and delete what you have downloaded so far. Next scan your machine. Then write down the name of the mirror or URL, that tried to sleaze bad stuff onto your machine. Keep a list of places to avoid. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ A Texan is bragging to a Rhode Islander. "In Texas," he drawls, "you can get on a train, ride all day long, and still be in Texas by nightfall." "Well", replies the Yankee, "We have some rather slow trains in Rhode Island too, but none that are THAT slow." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Dry Green Onions Inside Car I use a beer/Coke box flat that I get for free from the local store. Place the green onions (or other herbs and veggies) in the flat. Place in your car in the summer months and they dry in no time and perfectly. By Lacey K. [1] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ A little girl and her mother were out and about. The girl, out of the blue, asked her mother, "Mommy, How old are you?" The mother responded, "Honey, women don't talk about their age. You'll learn this as you get older." The girl then asked, "Mommy, how much do you weigh?" Her mother responded again, "That's another thing women don't talk about. You'll learn this, too, as you grow up." The girl still wanting to know about her mother, then fires off another question, "Mommy, Why did you and daddy get divorced?" The mother, a little annoyed by the questions, responded, "Honey, that is a subject that hurts me very much, and I don't want to talk about it now." The little girl, frustrated, sulks until she is dropped off at a friend's house to play. She consults with her girlfriend about her and her mother's conversation. The girlfriend says, "All you have to do is sneak and look at your mother's driver's license. It's just a like a report card from school. It tells you everything." Later, the little girl and her mother are out and about again. The little girl starts off with, "Mommy, Mommy, I know how old you are. I know how old you are. You're 32 years old." The mother is very shocked. She asks, "Sweetheart, how do you know that?" The little girl shrugs and says, "I just know. And I know how much you weigh. You weigh 130 pounds." "Where did you learn that?" The little girl says, "I just know. And I know why you and daddy got a divorce. You got an 'F' in sex." ___________________________________________________

competitive foursome
____________________________________________________ On a visit to Chicago, Jill was eager to visit a posh department store about a dozen blocks from their hotel. Her husband obligingly hailed a cab. They got in and he told the driver, "My wife wants to go to Neiman Marcus." The cabby looked over his shoulder at them and said, "And the gentleman? Does he want to go to the bank or the pawn shop?" ____________________________________________________
These artful three-dimensional cutouts with light behind them are so ethereal.

Today, October 3, in
1863 U.S. President Lincoln declared that the last Thursday 
 of November would be recognized as Thanksgiving Day. 
1893 The motor-driven vacuum cleaner was patented by Thurman. 
1901 The Victor Talking Machine Company was incorporated. 
 After a merger with Radio Corporation of America the company 
 became RCA-Victor. 
1906 W.T. Grant opened a 25-cent department store. 
1929 The Kingdom of Serbs, Croats and Slovenes officially 
 changed its name to the Kingdom of Yugoslavia. 
1932 Iraq was admitted into the League of Nations leading 
 Britain to terminate their mandate over the nation. Britain 
 had ruled Iraq since taking it from Turkey during World War I. 
1935 Italian forces invaded Abyssinia (now Ethiopia). 
1941 Adolf Hitler stated in a speech that Russia was "broken" 
 and they "would never rise again." 
1942 The Office of Economic Stabilization was established by 
 U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt. He also authorized 
 controls on rents, wages, salaries and farm prices. 
1944 During World War II, U.S. troops broke through the 
 Siegfried Line. 
1951 CBS-TV aired the first coast-to-coast telecast of a 
 prizefight. Dave Sands defeated Carl Olson at Soldier 
 Field in Chicago. 
1952 Britain became the third nuclear power in the world when 
 they successfully detonated their first atomic bomb. 
1955 "Captain Kangaroo" premiered on CBS-TV. 
1961 "The Dick Van Dyke Show" debuted on CBS-TV. 
1962 The Sigma VII blasted off from Cape Canaveral for a 
 nine-hour flight. 
1981 Irish Nationalists in Maze Prison in Belfast, Northern 
 Ireland called off their hunger strike. The strike had lasted 
 7 months and ten people had died. 
1988 The space shuttle Discovery landed safely after its 
 four-day mission. It was the first American shuttle mission 
 since the Challenger disaster. 
1989 East Germany suspended unrestricted travel to Czechoslovakia 
 in an effort to slow the flow of refugees to the West. 
1990 The Berlin Wall was dismantled eleven months after the borders 
 between East and West Germany were dissolved. The unification of 
 Germany ended 45 years of division. 
1990 Iraqi President Saddam Hussein made a visit to Kuwait since 
 his country had seized control of the oil-rich nation. 
1994 The headquarters of the Haitian pro-army militia was raided 
 by U.S. soldiers. 
2003 Ray Horn, of the duo "Siegfried & Roy," was attacked by a 
 tiger during a performance. Roy survived the attack after being 
 dragged offstage. The tiger, a 7-year-old male named Montecore, 
 was debuting in his first show. 
2006 North Korea announced that it would conduct a nuclear test 
 as a key step in the manufacture of atomic bombs that it viewed 
 as a deterrent against a U.S. attack. A date for the test was 
 not announced.
2015  smiled.

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