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Good Morning, ,
Today is Tuesday, October 27

Thank you Jim H.!!!!

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Today's Bonehead Award goes to an Iowa man, who was arrested after stealing a taxi Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 21, in 1659 William Robinson and Marmaduke Stevenson became the first Quakers to be executed in America. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ Statistics: The only science that enables different experts using the same figures to draw different conclusions. --- Evan Esar (1899 - 1995) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ A grandmother overheard her five-year-old granddaughter playing "wedding." The wedding vows went like this: "You have the right to remain silent, anything you say will be turned around and used against you, you have the right to have an attorney present. You may kiss the bride today." ______________________________________________________ Three wives were bemoaning their husbands' attitudes towards leftovers. "It gets rough," one said. "My husband is a Movie Producer and he calls them 'reruns'." "You think you have it bad," was the reply. "Mine is a Quality Control Engineer and he calls them 'rejects'!" "That's nothing compared to me," said the third lady. "My husband is a mortician. He calls them 'remains'!" ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Jim Hetrick for sending this picture, taken by Don Hole, one of his former students, who works the midnight shift at the Outer Banks Fishing Pier.: ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!
______________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Luis Orellana-Rivera, 26, Des Moines, Iowa
Iowa man was arrested after stealing a taxi An Iowa resident arrested for stealing a taxi moments after his release from a Des Moines hospital told cops that he boosted the ride because he did not want to walk the six blocks to his residence. According to police, Luis Orellana-Rivera, 26, hopped into a running cab parked outside Mercy Medical Center. The taxi driver told cops that he pulled up to the hospital’s front doors and left the car running as he made a delivery to the blood bank. Pictured in the above mug shot, Orellana-Rivera allegedly swiped the car around 6:15 AM Friday, immediately after his discharge. Shortly after the taxi’s owner reported the vehicle stolen, Des Moines Police Department cops used GPS data to locate the Ford Crown Victoria, which was parked less than a mile from the hospital. Orellana-Rivera was arrested as he exited the vehicle, which was in a lot behind his former residence. A “friend/former roommate” told police that Orellana-Rivera “has been having mental issues lately due to drug usage,” and has been “delusional and paranoid.” Orellana-Rivera, who had the cab’s keys in his pants pocket, told police that he opted to steal the car instead of walking home from the hospital. Orellana-Rivera, who spent about six hours at the medical center, was wearing a hospital bracelet and had a pulse oxygen device still attached to his finger when apprehended. Orellana-Rivera was arrested for felony theft and jailed in the Polk County lockup (where he is being held in lieu of $5000 bond).
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Edith Re: PDF form fillers Dear Webby, You mentioned Nitro PDF program a couple of weeks ago. My sister told me to get PDF-Exchange from Tracker-software. What is the difference? Edith Dear Edith If you just want to fill an occasional form, then the Nitro will be cheaper. They have a free Reader, that has limited "typing" abilities. For buying stuff or filling out your taxes, that's good enough. PDF-Exchange has no free version that i can see, but they have much better typing and editing abilities. If you are writing e-books and want to do fancy formatting, then you might want to check out the PDF-Exchange. You would still write the e-books with Open Office or WORD, and save them as PDF. However, since neither of those two are that good for picking up a PDF file and edit it, an editor like Nitro or PDF-Exchange are handy for quickly fixing a typo instead of opening the word processor doc, fixing the typo, and saving it as PDF again. And of course, filling forms is much easier with a dedicated PDF program like those two. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ A dog thinks: Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide me with a nice warm, dry house, pet me, and take good care of me . . . They must be Gods! A cat thinks: Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide me with a nice warm, dry house, pet me, and take good care of me . . . I must be a God! ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Use a Splatter Screen For Popcorn Here is a tip to release the aroma of popcorn but protect it from anything entering. Simply use a splatter screen cover. Great for home, picnics, or parties! By KIM HOGGAN [6] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Upon entering the little country store, the stranger noticed a sign saying: DANGER! BEWARE OF DOG! posted on the glass door. Inside he noticed an old hound dog sound asleep on the floor half way between the door and the cash register. He asked the store manager, "Is THAT the dog folks are supposed to beware of?" "Yep, that's him," he replied. The stranger couldn't help but be amused. "That certainly doesn't look like a dangerous dog to me. Why in the world would you post that sign?" "Because," the owner replied, "before I posted that sign, people kept tripping over him and bashing their teeth out on the counter." ___________________________________________________

GoPro: Backflip Over 72ft Canyon
____________________________________________________ I couldn't help overhearing a man at a nearby pay phone. "I know it's something you want," he said earnestly, "but I don't think tattoos are a good idea. And the same goes for body piercing. As long as you're living in my house, I think you should respect my wishes." I was secretly cheering him on for his fatherly firmness. Then came the 'coup de grace': "Besides, Ma, you're 87 years old! You don't NEED a tattoo and a nose ring!" ____________________________________________________ Noella's Blunders It's not a cooking story, but here's one: I have several friends who consider themselves to be very spiritual.¯ They advised that I should watch the sunrise every morning — that it would be a very spiritual experience for me. It sounded good, so the next morning I got up early enough to catch it. I was still lying in my bed when I looked out the window and saw the most beautiful yellow light ever. I gazed on that sun as it was rising in the sky and felt an awesome sense of peace. Then it slowly dawned on me that the sun wasn't rising. I went to the window to check it out and found myself staring at the light pole across the street! I had a really spiritual epihany when I saw the light. It was time to clean the windows. ____________________________________________________
Russian Dance Group Float across the Stage

Today, October 27, in
1659 William Robinson and Marmaduke Stevenson became the 
 first Quakers to be executed in America. 
1858 Roland Macy opened Macy's Department Store in New York 
 City. It was Macy's eighth business adventure, the other 
 seven failed. 
1878 The Manhattan Savings Bank in New York City was robbed 
 of over $3,000,000. The robbery was credited to George 
 "Western" Leslie even though there was not enough evidence 
 to convict him, only two of his associates were convicted. 
1904 The New York subway system officially opened. It was 
 the first rapid-transit subway system in America. 
1925 Fred Waller received a patent for water skis. 
1927 The first newsreel featuring sound was released in 
 New York. 
1931 Chuhei Numbu of Japan set a long jump record at 
 26' 2 1/4". 
1938 Du Pont announced "nylon" as the new name for its 
 new synthetic yarn. 
1947 "You Bet Your Life," the radio show starring 
 Grouch Marx, premiered on ABC. It was later shown on 
 NBC television. 
1954 Marilyn Monroe and Joe DiMaggio were divorced. 
 They had been married on January 14, 1954. 
1962 The Soviet Union adds to the Cuban Missile Crisis 
 by calling for the dismantling of U.S. missile basis 
 in Turkey. U.S. President Kennedy agreed to the new 
 aspect of the agreement. 
1978 Egyptian President Anwar Sadat and Israeli Prime 
 Minister Menachem Begin were named winners of the 
 Nobel Peace Prize for their progress toward achieving 
 a Middle East accord. 
1994 The U.S. Justice Department announced that the 
 U.S. prison population had exceeded one million for 
 the first time in American history. 
2002 Emmitt Smith (Dallas Cowboys) became the all-time 
 leading rusher in the NFL when he extended his career 
 yardage to 16,743. He achieved the record in his 193rd 
 game. He also scored his 150th career touchdown. 
2002 Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva was elected president of 
 Brazil in a runoff. He was the country's first elected 
 leftist leader. 
2003 Bank of America Corp. announced it had agreed to buy 
 FleetBoston Financial Corp. The deal created the second 
 largest banking company in the U.S.
2015  smiled.

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