Thesaurus 



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Today is Sunday, November 8



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DearWebby

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Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Arkansas mother, who was arrested after she put bourbon in her baby's bottle Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, November 8, in 1805 The "Corps of Discovery" reached the Pacific Ocean. The expedition was led by William Clark and Meriwether Lewis. The journey had begun on May 14, 1804, with the goal of exploring the Louisiana Purchase territory. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ The Romans would never have found time to conquer the world if they had been obliged first to learn Latin. --- Heinrich Heine (1797 - 1856) She had an unequalled gift... of squeezing big mistakes into small opportunities. --- Henry James (1843 - 1916) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Official sign near door: Door Alarmed. Handprinted sign nearby: Window frightened. ______________________________________________________ Patient: "Nurse, during my operation I heard the surgeon use a four-letter word that upset me very much." Nurse: "What word was that?" Patient: "Oops!" ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________
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______________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Lori Sheppard, 28,Mt. Holly, Arkansas
Arrested after she put bourbon in her baby's bottle NOVEMBER 6--When her teething infant son would not stop crying, an Arkansas woman called her mother and was told to rub some alcohol on the child’s painful gums. Instead, cops charge, Lori Sheppard, 28, put bourbon in her 10-month-old son’s bottle, leading to the infant’s hospitalization and her arrest for child endangerment and aggravated assault. Sheppard’s son Ronald was rushed last week to a hospital emergency room after he was found “limp and unresponsive.” Sheppard initially told cops that the child “was fine before she placed him in his playpen” inside the family’s trailer home in Mt. Holly, a community about 125 miles south of Little Rock. Sheppard claimed that when she briefly left the trailer, her five-year-old stepbrother went inside. When she returned to the home, Sheppard said she found Ronald “unconscious and unresponsive.” During police questioning, Sheppard initially denied giving the baby alcohol (the child’s father told police that there was “a 5th of bourbon in the freezer at the trailer”). But, cops say, she eventually confessed to putting booze in Ronald’s bottle. Sheppard told investigators that when Tylenol and Motrin did not relieve the infant’s discomfort, she sought advice from her mother, who suggested rubbing alcohol on Ronald’s gums. The child, who was airlifted to Arkansas Children’s Hospital in Little Rock, had a blood alcohol content of .19, according to a Union County Sheriff’s Office report. After several days of treatment, the boy was discharged into the custody of child welfare workers. Pictured above in an unfortunate message t-shirt, Sheppard was booked into jail on the felony charges. A judge set her bond at $10,000
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Frank Re: Open Office Thesaurus Hi Dear Webby, Again a question for the cyber world's main avatar: I can't get the Thesaurus to open in my Open Office. I have their latest version 4.1.1 but even following their help instructions about activating the Thesaurus doesn't work and still leaves it greyed out and unusable. Do you have a solution? As always my sincere thanks. Be well, live long, and prosper, Walter Dear Walter On my OO, I highlight a word, and hit CTRL F7 and the Thesaurus comes up showing a bunch of alternate words. There are two possibilities. 1) You haven't selected a language in Tools, Language or 2) When you installed it, you installed just the basics, without the Thesaurus. If it is #2, just reinstall it, and this time let it go whole hog. It takes more space, but that is the price you pay for having the big dictionary and the Thesaurus on the shelf. Have FUN! DearWebby Dear Webby, thank you again for having the right answer. I downloaded Open Office 4.1.2. and now the Thesaurus works perfectly. Be well, live long, and prosper, Walter _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Teacher: If your father earned $100.00 and gave half to your mother, what would she have? Little Johnny: A heart attack! ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Making Coffee Without a Coffeemaker A week ago, I broke our carafe to our coffee maker. My husband and I had already gone shopping so we had a full can of coffee. We were out of instant coffee, which made this an emergency, at least for me! My husband to the rescue. He made his own instant pouch using a coffee filter, twist tie and boiling water. Here are the instructions. Take 2 teaspoon per (8 oz.)cup of coffee. Add this to a coffee filter. Tie filter with twist tie or string. Drop filter into a pot of boiling water (16 oz. of water) Let coffee and filter simmer in hot water to desired color. The darker the stronger your coffee will taste. It's like boiling a tea bag in a pot of water. Sorry about my pic of my coffee, I also spilled non-dairy coffee creamer. No matter, I just did not feel like getting up to take a better pic, but I did enjoy my cup of coffee. By Georgetta Ruth [73] When I was living in the bush in the Yukon I rigged a coil of 3/8" copper tubing into the s tove pipe of the "kitchen stove" just outside the tent. The inside airtight was not used in summer. The copper pipe came out of the stove pipe high enough to neatly drip into a Melitta (Cone filter) sitting on top of a one gallon blue enamel coffee pot. The water for the water heater came from the high tank hanging up high inside the 12' x 16' tent. That made beautiful coffee for years until I finished building the new house. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ News Item: An Oregon State University animal rights activist denounces vegetarianism because mice, moles and rabbits are often killed in the preparation of farmland to grow vegetables. You might want to stop eating until the dogooders sort this out. ___________________________________________________
____________________________________________________ Two cowboys were scouting near their fort and worrying that the Indians might be overrunning them. As they listened to the distant pounding war drums, one cowboy muttered to the other: "I don't like the sound of them drums." Just then, an apologetic voice came from behind a bush, "Our regular drummer slept in." >From Barb ____________________________________________________ *Last night I was driving home and listening to a sports call-in program, carried by WGN in Chicago on SIRIUS. People were calling in, very upset, about the goat's head that was sent to Cubs owner Tom Ricketts at Wrigley Field.* *Then some guy called in from Indiana and said, "Why are you people so upset 'cause someone sent a goat's head to Wrigley Field? Aren't you Chicagoans the same guys that sent a horse's ass to the White House?" * *I had to pull over!* ____________________________________________________ Noella's Blunders Not my blunder but by someone I knew well. As a truck driver, I have to be careful to pace myself for bathroom stops. It happened one day that my body wasn't cooperating with my paced schedule. At the next drop-off, before going into the office and having the papers signed, I ran into their restroom. You can imagine my relief as I downloaded (it wasn't #1). Now you can imagine my horror when I look down at the floor and see the hole where the stool was SUPPOSED to sit. I felt so sorry for those plumbers. Noella ____________________________________________________
So very limber and graceful.

Today, November 8, in
1793 The Louvre Museum, in Paris, opened to the public. 
1805 The "Corps of Discovery" reached the Pacific Ocean. The 
 expedition was led by William Clark and Meriwether Lewis. 
 The journey had begun on May 14, 1804, with the goal of 
 exploring the Louisiana Purchase territory. 
1895 Wilhelm Roentgen while experimenting with electricity 
 discovered the scientific principle involved and took 
 the first X-ray pictures. 
1910 William H. Frost patented the insect exterminator. 
1923 Adolf Hitler made his first attempt at seizing power 
 in Germany with a failed coup in Munich that came to be 
 known as the "Beer-Hall Putsch." 
1933 The Civil Works Administration was created by executive 
 order by U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt. The 
 organization was designed to create jobs for more than 4 
 million unemployed people in the U.S. 
1942 The U.S. invaded Morocco and Algeria. 
1942 During World War II, Operation Torch began as U.S. and 
 British forces landed in French North Africa. 
1950 During the Korean conflict, the first jet-plane battle 
 took place as U.S. Air Force Lt. Russell J. Brown shot down 
 a North Korean MiG-15. 
1956 After turning down 18,000 names, the Ford Motor Company 
 decided to name their new car the "Edsel," after Henry Ford's 
 only son. 
1966 Ronald Reagan was elected governor of California. 
1980 Scientists at the Jet Propulsion Laboratory in California 
 announced that they had discovered a 15th moon orbiting the 
 planet Saturn. 
1990 U.S. President George H.W. Bush ordered more troop deployments 
 in the Persian Gulf, adding about 150,000 soldiers to the multi-
 national force fighting against Iraq. 
1991 The European Community and Canada imposed economic sanctions 
 on Yugoslavia in an attempt to stop the Balkan civil war. 
1992 About 350,000 people rallied in Berlin against racist 
 violence. 
1993 Five Picasso paintings and other artwork were stolen from 
 the Museum of Modern Art in Stockholm, Sweden. The works were 
 valued at $52 million. 
1997 Chinese engineers diverted the Yangtze River to make way for 
 the Three Gorges Dam. 
2000 In Florida, a statewide recount began to decide the winner 
 of the 2000 U.S. presidential election. 
2009 The game Angry Birds Star Wars was released. 
2015  smiled.


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