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Good Morning, ,
Today is Wednesday, December 9

Thank you, Frank!!!
Thank You, Jim!

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Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Drunken Saudi tourist, who exposed himself, spilled cocaine on Aspen taxi driver Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, December 9, in 1854 Alfred Lord Tennyson's poem, "The Charge of the Light Brigade," was published in England. History ______________________________________________________ It is easier to fight for one's principles than to live up to them. --- Alfred Adler (1870 - 1937) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ >From Lillemor Don't loan your tools I woke up to go to the toilet in the middle of the night (as I often do) and I noticed a diaper-headed individual with a knife, sneaking through my next door neighbor's garden. Suddenly my neighbor came from nowhere and smacked him over the head with a shovel a few times, killing him quite thoroughly. He then dug a grave, put the body in it and covered it. Astonished, I got back into bed. As I tossed and turned my wife said, "You're upset, what is it?" “You'll never believe what I've just seen,” I said. “That SOB next door still has my shovel.” ______________________________________________________ While walking in the park one morning, Bill found a couple of brand new golf balls by a bench. They obviously must have fallen out of a pocket or bag when somebody rested there the day before. "Waste not, Want not" he thought as he slipped the balls into the pocket of his shorts, intending to give them to a co-worker who was a golf nut. Later, on his way home, he stopped at a pedestrian crossing, waiting for the lights to change. A girl standing next to him saw the large bulge in his shorts. "What's that?" she asked,... with her eyes gleaming lustfully. "Golf balls," he replied. "Oh," said the girl sympathetically, "that must be painful.... I had tennis elbow once!"
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______________________________________________________ >Reported by Wayne An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Majed Alhamad, 23, Los Angeles, California
Drunken Saudi tourist exposed himself, spilled cocaine on Aspen taxi driver A Saudi Arabian man allegedly cursed an Aspen taxi driver and exposed himself to the man before spilling cocaine on him during a ride to the St. Regis Hotel last weekend, according to court documents. Majed Alhamad, 23, later admitted he was intoxicated and told Aspen police officers “he wanted to go ‘extreme’ while in Aspen,” according to an affidavit filed in District Court on Friday. The 60-year-old driver for High Mountain Taxi told police that Alhamad — whose booking sheet lists him as a student in Los Angeles — offered him cocaine “a number of times” on the ride early Friday morning to the St. Regis, but the driver refused, the affidavit states. “(The driver) stated this angered Alhamad,” according to the affidavit written by an Aspen police officer. “(The driver) said that Alhamad used vulgar language and derogatory racial terms ... and ‘f---ing American’ while in the vehicle.” The taxi driver also said Alhamad “exposed his genitals to him” and “opened the baggie of cocaine and spilled it on him,” the affidavit states. “(The driver) stated that he did not want anything to happen to the individual but felt the need to report the incident to law enforcement,” according to the officer’s affidavit. When officers spoke with Alhamad and his friend, a sergeant recognized them because he’d helped them get a taxi back to their hotel earlier in the night. Alhamad admitted to buying the cocaine for $100 from someone on the street he didn’t know, the affidavit states. “Alhamad stated he knew it was not real cocaine and stated it was baby powder,” according to the affidavit. “I asked Alhamad how he knew it was not cocaine and he said it smelled like baby powder and he had done cocaine in the past.” An officer tested the cocaine baggie and received a “presumptive positive” on it for cocaine, according to the affidavit. Alhamad admitted to using derogatory words toward the driver but said he didn’t spill the white powder on him, according to the affidavit. The officer wrote that Alhamad smelled of alcohol. “Alhamad said he wanted to go ‘extreme’ while in Aspen but will have to pay for this incident,” the affidavit states. Alhamad was charged with felony possession of cocaine and harassment. If he ever goes back to Saudi Arabia, he is likely to face dire consequences.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Frank Re: Ghostery Dear Webby, Now I have a BIG problem with receiving your daily newsletter. I've not received it the last 4 - 5 days. I utilize Mailwasher and have for years. Your newsletter is flagged as 'never mark for delete'. Late last week I installed the following.... and checked the column to block at 'trackers' because I get tired of seeing all the ads, etc. I don't know how that would stop mail from going to the Cox server but I'm not a genius about those things. I'm getting emails from friends and since I don't do much on line shopping I cannot tell whether or not businesses are blocked. The last business email was from Amazon on Dec. 4 about the same time I installed the program. I'm able to see you newsletter and vote daily but I do like to get my personal edition. If I need to delete I will but it has been nice not to get all that junk. Perhaps I can accept some tracking but I don't know which to change and which to keep. Need your assistance if possible. If you feel it is my ISP how do I go about getting their co-operation and have any others with a ISP complained. How will I know if you respond IF my ISP has blocked your address? Perhaps a note in Wednesdays letter would tell me. Peace Frank Dear Frank You are in the list, and your personalized newsletter goes out towards you every night. Ghostery is mostly a tracking system reporting on you, and does a bit of cookie control to make you think it is a benefit to you. Unlike Malwarebytes it does not stop real malware. If you want to dump cookies, CrapCleaner has done that quite nicely for fifteen years, maybe more, without any snooping or reporting whatsoever. However, Ghostery just reports on your browsing to the advertising industry. I don't see how it would interfere with your email. Browsing and email are totally separate, like highways are separate from railroads. If your email stopped on the same day as you attached the Ghostery snoop&report add-on, that is probably just a coincidence. Have a look in the MailWasher Recycle Bin. If the Humor Letter is NOT in there, then it got dumped before it ever got to you. In that case, pitch a temper tantrum at your ISP. Please tell me if and when you get this letter. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Grandpa was celebrating his 100th birthday and everybody complimented him on how athletic and well-preserved he appeared. "Gentlemen, I will tell you the secret of my success," he cackled. "I have been in the open air day after day for some 75 years now." The celebrants were impressed and asked how he managed to keep up his rigorous fitness regime. "Well, you see, my wife and I were married 75 years ago. On our wedding night, we made a solemn pledge. Whenever we had a fight, the one who was proved wrong, would go outside and take a walk. By the time Jenny died thirtyfive years ago, my walks had become a habit and it was no big deal to keep them up." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Cook Frozen Dinner Rolls in the Microwave Just like many of the other foods I warm daily in the microwave, frozen dinner rolls are great hot out of the microwave as well. I have the highest wattage microwave and, on thirty seconds, these yeast rolls are hit and ready to be enjoyed. Note that they will be very hot when coming out of the microwave, so exercise due caution as you would with any other food coming out of the microwave. By Robyn [373] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Sarah's car was unreliable and she called Sam for a ride every time it broke down. One day Sam got yet another one of those calls. "What happened this time?" he asked. "My brakes went out," Sarah said. "Can you come to get me?" "Where are you?" Sam asked. "I'm in the drugstore," Sarah responded. "And where's the car?" Sam asked. Sarah replied, "It's in here with me." ___________________________________________________
Twelve Days of Christmas (funny)
____________________________________________________ It was the day of the big sale. Rumors of the sale (and some advertising on the net) were the main reason for the long line that formed in front of the store by 8:30, the store's opening time. A small man pushed his way to the front of the line, only to be pushed back, amid loud and colorful curses. On the man's second attempt, he was punched square in the jaw by a slightly overweight lady, knocked around a bit, and then thrown to the end of the line again. As he got up the second time, he said to the person at the end of the line, "That does it! If they hit me one more time, I'm not opening the store!" ____________________________________________________ Children are natural mimics, who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners. ____________________________________________________
Canadian artist Calvin Nicholls creates extraordinary 3D sculptures using paper.

Today, December 9, in
1793 "The American Minerva" was published for the first time. 
 It was the first daily newspaper in New York City and was 
 founded by Noah Webster. 
1854 Alfred Lord Tennyson's poem, "The Charge of the Light Brigade," 
 was published in England. 
1879 Thomas Edison organized the Edison Ore Milling Company. 
1884 Levant M. Richardson received a patent for the ball-bearing 
 roller skate. 
1907 Christmas Seals went on sale for the first time, in the 
 Wilmington, DE, post office. 
1914 The Edison Phonograph Works was destroyed by fire. 
1917 Turkish troops surrendered Jerusalem to British troops led 
 by Viscount Allenby. 
1940 During World War II, British troops opened their first 
 major offensive in North Africa. 
1940 The Longines Watch Company signed for the first FM radio 
 advertising contract with experimental station W2XOR in 
 New York City. 
1941 China declared war on Japan, Germany and Italy. 
1955 Sugar Ray Robinson knocked out Carl Olson and regained 
 his world middleweight boxing title. 
1958 In Indianapolis, IN, Robert H.W. Welch Jr. and 11 other 
 men met to form the anti-Communist John Birch Society. 
1960 Sperry Rand Corporation unveiled a new computer known 
 as "Univac 1107." 
1960 The first episode of "Coronation Street" was screened 
 on ITV. 
1962 "Lawrence of Arabia" by David Lean had its world 
 premiere in London. 
1975 U.S. President Gerald R. Ford signed a $2.3 billion 
 seasonal loan authorization to prevent New York City from 
 having to default. 
1978 The first game of the Women's Pro Basketball League 
 (WBL) was played between the Chicago Hustle and the 
 Milwaukee Does. 
1985 In Argentina, five former military junta members 
 received sentences in prison for their roles in the 
 "dirty war" in which nearly 9,000 people had "disappeared." 
1987 West Bank Palestinians launched an intifada (uprising) 
 against Israeli occupation. 
1987 In the Gaza Strip, an Israeli patrol attacked the 
 Jabliya refugee camp. 
1990 Lech Walesa won Poland's first direct presidential 
 election in the country's history. 
1990 Slobodan Milosovic was elected president in Serbia's 
 first free elections in 50 years. 
1990 The first American hostages to be released by Iraq 
 began arriving in the U.S. 
1991 European Community leaders agreed to begin using a 
 single currency in 1999. 
1992 Britain's Prince Charles and Princess Diana announced 
 their separation. 
1992 Clair George, former CIA spy chief, was convicted of 
 lying to the U.S. Congress about the Iran-Contra affair. 
 U.S. President George H.W. Bush later pardoned George. 
1992 U.S. troops arrived in Mogadishu, Somalia, to oversee 
 delivery of international food aid. 
1993 The U.S. Air Force destroyed the first of 500 
 Minuteman II missile silos that were marked for 
 elimination under an arms control treaty.
1993 Astronauts aboard the space shuttle Endeavor completed 
 repairs to the Hubble Space Telescope. 
1993 At Princeton University in New Jersey, scientists 
 produced a controlled fusion reaction equivalent to 
 3 million watts. 
1994 Representatives of the Irish Republican Army and the 
 British government opened peace talks in Northern Ireland. 
1996 UN Secretary General Boutros-Ghali approved a deal 
 allowing Iraq to resume its exports of oil and easing the 
 UN trade embargo imposed on Iraq in 1990. 
1999 The U.S. announced that it was expelling a Russian 
 diplomat that had been caught gathering information with 
 an eavesdropping device at the U.S. State Department. 
2002 United Airlines filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy after 
 losing $4 billion in the previous two years. It was the 
 sixth largest bankruptcy filing. 
2003 In Australia, thieves broke into a home and stole two 
 300-year-old etchings by Rembrandt. The 4-by-4-inch etchings, 
 a self-portait and a depiction of the artist's mother, were 
 valued around $518,000. 
2015  smiled.

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