Laptop versus desktop 

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Today is Tuesday, January 26

Happy Australia Day!

Have FUN!
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Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Florida woman, who was arrested after she ended a low speed chase right on the lawn of the police station. Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, in 1788 The first European settlers in Australia, led by Captain Arthur Phillip, landed in what became known as Sydney. The group had first settled at Botany Bay eight days before. This day is celebrated as Australia Day. History ______________________________________________________ Every man is the architect of his own fortune. --- Sallust (86 BC - 34 BC) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ >From Liz For their 20th anniversary Nina and her husband vacationed in Hawaii, where they went snorkeling. After an hour in the water, everyone got back on the boat, except for Nina and one handsome young man. As she continued her underwater exploring, she noticed that everywhere she swam to, he swam. Nina snorkeled for another 40 minutes. So did he. Nina felt very flattered and, as she took off my fins, asked him coyly why he had stayed in the water for so long. "I'm the lifeguard," he replied matter-of-factly. "It's my job to stay in the water till the last tourist is back on the boat." ______________________________________________________
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______________________________________________________ A little boy went to the store with his grandmother and on the way home, he was looking at the things she had purchased. He found a package of panty hose and began to sound out the words "Queen Size". He then turned to his grandmother and exclaimed, "Grandma, are these for mom ? They are the same size as mom's bed!" ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________
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______________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Lisa Myers, 56, New Port Richey, Floriduh Florida woman was arrested after she ended a low speed chase right on the lawn of the police station. The subject of a pursuit on U-S 19 drives right to the police station, although that probably wasn't what she intended. Pasco Deputies say 56 year old Lisa Myers was driving north on 19 at Marine Parkway, and they noticed she was falling asleep at the wheel. When the deputy and a New Port Richey officer tried to pull her over, the sheriff's office says, Myers tried to run the cop over, and almost hit a patrol car during the low speed chase that followed. Myers ended up in the police parking lot, drove over a curb and onto the lawn, then she backed up and hit a cruiser. She is facing several charges, including aggravated assault of a law enforcement officer, fleeing to elude, and and investigation is ongoing to determine whether she was under the influence of drugs or alcohol or both. Investigators say they also found a gun inside her car. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Deb Re: Difference between laptop and desktop computers Dear Webby You mentioned laptops and desktops. What is the difference between laptops and desktops, aside from looks ? Deb Dear Deb As far as computer performance is concered, there is absolutely no difference whatsoever. Desktops use leftover powersupplies from the 1980's that pull dustbunnies and pet hair in through the CD drives, regulate the power by heating up that air and then blow the cleaned and heated air out the back through a noisy old fan. Laptops use power supplies from the 1990's and 2000's with smaller and quieter fans that pull the air in through a grill on the bottom. Those newer power supplies are a lot more efficient and don't produce anywhere near as much heat, even though they have the monitor, keyboard, touchpad and battery included. Also, with laptops, part of the waste heat is already gotten rid of by the coffee warmer, ahem battery charger. Both desktops and laptops have a metal box to shield magnetic radiation, that could annoy your TV watching spouse, but the laptop in addition to that has a cute plastic skin over that. Since the chips and electronics inside are the same, it must be the battery, monitor and plastic skin that cause laptops to still be a bit more expensive, but as the old 1980's stockpiles of power supplies and cases are getting used up, the prices are getting closer. Dell, for example, has quite decent laptops for under $500. Performance is identical, but desktops produce a lot more noise and heat. In the old days hard drives used to be a deciding factor, because with desktops you could stick additional hard drives in. Nowadays, you just use external hard drives plugged into a USB port. With external hard drives it makes no difference what kind of drive it is. No need to match the machine's connfiguration. Batteries used to be a concern, but if you just use the machine in your office, it will always be plugged in and the battery will last as long as the rest of the machine. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ One night a father was helping his son with his homework. The father asked "What is the Gross National Product?" His son pondered for a minute and replied, "Spinach?" ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Chocolate Orange Fudge Brownies My husband and I are huge fans of Terry's Chocolate Oranges, the orange shaped chocolate balls that have a yummy hint of orange. I made this recipe out of the blue and it turned out WAY better than I thought it would. It is so elegant, rich and super easy to make. My version only has five ingredients. Approximate Time: 45 to 55 minutes Yield: 9 to 12 brownies Ingredients: 1 pkg plain brownie mix (I used a generic 10.25 ounce pack) 1 medium/large orange 1/4 cup oil 1 egg 2/3 cup chocolate chips or chunks (I chopped up candy bars) Steps: Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Take the zest off the whole orange. Chocolate Orange Fudge BrowniesChocolate Orange Fudge Brownies Separate orange zest equally in two bowls. Put one aside. Chocolate Orange Fudge Brownies Cut the orange into segments and squeeze the juice into one of the orange zest bowls. It should give you about half a cup of juice. Crack open and whisk your egg. Add orange juice and zest mixture into egg. Mix in the oil. Add package of brownie powder. Mix well, stirring at least 50 times. Add chocolate chips/chunks to your batter. Pour batter into a greased pan. Sprinkle the top with reserved orange zest. Depending on the size of your pan, bake from 35 to 40 minutes (do a toothpick test). Cool, cut into squares, and serve! By attosa [164] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ An architect, an artist and a engineer were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress. The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship. The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress,because of the passion and mystery he found there. The engineer said, "I like both." "Both?" "Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the office and get some work done." ___________________________________________________
Doritos baby can't wait
____________________________________________________ >From Dotty AN ADVERTISEMENT in our local newspaper read: "Boyfriend wanted for female Siamese cat. Object: Kittens. Terms negotiable." Since I had a male Siamese, I called the party. The woman offered $ l0 an hour as a stud fee. I said, "You mean if it takes three hours, I'll get thirty dollars?" The woman answered, "Yes." Then I asked, "Suppose it takes six hours. Will I get sixty dollars?" After a long pause, the woman asked, "Just how old is your cat?" ____________________________________________________ My Parents had not been out together in quite some time. One Saturday, as Mom was finishing the dinner dishes, my father stepped up behind her and asked. "Would you like to go out, girl?" Not even turning around, my mother quickly replied, "Oh, yes, I'd love to!" They had a wonderful evening, and it wasn't until the end of the evening that Dad finally confessed that his question had actually been directed to the family dog, laying near Mom's feet on the kitchen floor. ____________________________________________________
Big dogs who think they are still puppies.

Today, January 26, in
1500 Vicente Yáńez Pinzón discovered Brazil. 
1736 Stanislaus I formally abdicated as King of Poland. 
1784 In a letter to his daughter, Benjamin Franklin expressed 
 unhappiness over the eagle as the symbol of America. He 
 wanted the symbol to be the turkey. 
1788 The first European settlers in Australia, led by Captain 
 Arthur Phillip, landed in what became known as Sydney. 
 The group had first settled at Botany Bay eight days before. 
 This day is celebrated as Australia Day. 
1827 Peru seceded from Colombia in protest against Simón 
 Bolívar's alleged tyranny. 
1837 Michigan became the 26th state to join the United States. 
1841 Britain formally occupied Hong Kong, which the Chinese 
 had ceded to the British. 
1861 In the U.S., Louisiana seceded from the Union. 
1870 The state of Virgina rejoined the Union. 
1875 George F. Green patented the electric dental drill 
 for sawing, filing, dressing and polishing teeth. 
1905 The Cullinan diamond, at 3,106.75 carats, was found 
 by Captain Wells at the Premier Mine, near Pretoria, 
 South Africa. 
1911 Inventor Glenn H. Curtiss flew the first successful 
1939 In the Spanish Civil War, Franco's forces, with 
 Italian aid, took Barcelona. 
1942 The first American expeditionary force to go to Europe 
 during World War II went ashore in Northern Ireland. 
1950 India officially proclaimed itself a republic as 
 Rajendra Prasad took the oath of office as president. 
1950 The American Associated Insurance Companies, of 
 St. Louis, MO, issued the first baby sitter’s insurance policy. 
1962 The U.S. launched Ranger 3 to land scientific instruments 
 on the moon. The probe missed its target by about 22,000 miles. 
1965 Hindi was made the official language of India. 
1969 California was declared a disaster area two days of 
 flooding and mudslides. 
1972 In Hermsdorf, Czechoslovakia, a JAT Yugoslav Airlines 
 flight crashed after the detonation of a bomb in the forward 
 cargo hold killing 27 people. The bomb was believed to have 
 been placed on the plane by a Croatian extremist group. 
 Vesna Vulovic, a stewardess, survived after falling 33,000 
 feet in the tail section. She broke both legs and became 
 paralyzed from the waist down. 
1979 The ‘Gizmo’ guitar synthesizer was first demonstrated. 
1993 Former Czechoslovak President Vaclav Havel was elected 
 president of the new Czech Republic. 
1994 In Sydney, Australia, a young man lunged at and fired 
 two blank shots at Britain's Prince Charles. 
1996 U.S. First Lady Hillary Rodham Clinton testified before 
 a grand jury concerning the Whitewater probe. 
1998 U.S. President Clinton denied having an affair with a 
 former White House intern, saying "I did not have sexual 
 relations with that woman, Miss Lewinsky." 
1999 Saddam Hussein vowed revenge against the U.S. in response 
 to air-strikes that reportedly killed civilians. The strikes 
 were U.S. planes defending themselves against anti-aircraft fire. 
2009 The Icelandic government and banking system collapsed. 
 Prime Minister Geir Haarde resigned. 
2010 It was announced that James Cameron's movie "Avatar" had 
 become the highest-grossing film worldwide. 
2015  smiled.

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