Converting the TIF produced by scanner 

Good Morning, ,

Today is Friday, February 12
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!

Have FUN!
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Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Florida woman arrested for attacking boyfriend after he refused to give her money for crack
Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, February 12, in 1907 A collision of the steamer Larchmont and a schooner resulted in the death of more than 300 people. The incident occurred off New England's Block Island. History ______________________________________________________ Too much of a good thing is wonderful. --- Mae West (1892 - 1980) Humor is just another defense against the universe. --- Mel Brooks (1926 - ) "The most overlooked advantage of owning a computer is that if they foul up there's no law against whacking them around a bit." --- Eric Porterfield ( The technical term for that is: "Percussive maintenance" ) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Things were rather slow so Bobbie, the reporter for the local newspaper, went to the vocational school and visited each classroom. But things were rather slow there too. In Tailoring nobody had sown through any interesting body parts, just the instructor had sown her sleve to a student's workpiece again, but she already had published a similar picture. No blood in carpentry. Nobody had parked any engine on their foot in automotive, and the guy with the transmission on his chest under the Edsel had not moved since last month. As a last resort, Bobby went to Hospitality to see if their new French chef had at least some freebie lunch. No such luck. All the students were busy stirring some gluey gunk in huge soup pots with big wooden spoons. Bobbie asked the chef if it was a French tradition to use wooden spoons for stirring. "No", he replied. "Management deezisson." Bobby asked why management dared to interfere with his superior skills. "If ve hafe 30 of zese bimbos beatin metal pots wizz metal spoonz, zen I go crezie, an zen I kill zem all before zey finish pay for zeir tuition, an ze management, zey dount like dat." ______________________________________________________
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______________________________________________________ During my brother's wedding, my mother managed to keep from crying until she glanced at my grandparents. My grandmother had reached over to my grandfather's wheelchair and gently touched his hand. That was all it took to start my mother's tears flowing. After the wedding, Mom went over to my grandmother and told her how that tender gesture triggered her outburst. "Well, I'm sorry to ruin your moment," Grandmother replied, "but George hates beeing wheeled about when he is sleeping and I had promised to wake him up a few minutes before it was over." ______________________________________________________ View from Mt Everest. From FB ______________________________________________________
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______________________________________________________ reported by Sr Anna An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Diana Burnett, 52, Lake Worth, Floriduh Woman arrested for attacking boyfriend after he refused to give her money for crack A suburban Lake Worth woman is behind bars after she attacked her 67-year-old boyfriend when he refused to give her money to buy crack, according to a Palm Beach County Sheriff’s Office report. On Tuesday night, investigators say Diana Burnett, 52, put her hands around her live-in boyfriend’s neck and scratched him after he told her he wouldn’t give her $100 to buy drugs. The boyfriend told investigators Burnett had been drinking alcohol and smoking crack most of the day when she attacked him. He told deputies that in his 19 years with Burnett, he endured ongoing domestic issues and could no longer live with the abuse, according to the report. Burnett, who refused to come to court Wednesday morning for her first appearance, faces one charge of battery on a person over age 65. She will remain in the Palm Beach County Jail without bail until her scheduled court appearance Thursday morning. Burnett has previously been arrested twice on the same charge, according to court records. Charges were never filed in those cases. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Eddie Re: Scanner produces TIF Dear Webby Its been a very long time, so how have you've been? As for me i lost my dad this past winter. Well its been tough and Im struggling but making it. I got a question for you. From time to time, I scann some documents and it comes out in a "TIF" form and i send it to my sisters, but 1 sister cannot open it up. so do you know a free program that can change a "TIF" file to a MS Word Doc? Take care my friend! Eddie Dear Eddie ANY graphics program will do that. Even "PAINT", which has been included free in Windows since the stone age, will do that. Click on START type paint and it will find it. It is just a very basic paint program, but you can open any picture file, including TIF, and save it as a JPG. It is not a fancy, all around paint program, but it will do just fine for basic stuff like that. You can even crop, resize, rotate and copy. That is all you need for that, and won't cost you a penny. Nothing to download. It is already installed, just not well known. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ The very frugal business manager was checking on the travel expenses of his salesmen, when he began to mutter, then yell. One of the salesmen worked up his courage and came over to ask the boss what was wrong. "Look at this crook's travel expenses," the boss said. "How could he possibly spend forty dollars a day for meals in that small town in Ohio?" "It's easy," explained the salesman cheerfully. "All you have to do is skip breakfast." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Pre-Marinating Chicken Before Freezing By Jackie H. 136 When I shop, I look for sales on family size packages of chicken, legs, thighs, quarters, and breasts. I love to make my own marinades, and this can be done before freezing your chicken. One of my marinade recipes is: 1 cup of brown sugar 1 cup soy sauce 2 Tbsp. lemon juice 1/2 tsp. black pepper 2 tsp. ground ginger 1/2 cup water Mix these ingredients well until the sugar is completely dissolved. Package your chicken for your meal in freezer ZipLoc bags. Add 1/4-1/2 cup of marinade to each bag. This freezes nicely, and when defrosted, it taste just like you marinated it that day. Try using Italian, Greek or Balsamic dressing as your marinade. These are delicious, too. ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Ronnie volunteered to strip the bricks from the exterior of in-law's house. One morning he was out front chipping away when a man came by looking for his father-in-law. "He's not here," Ronnie said. The man thanked him, watched him remove a few more bricks, and said, "I'll bet next time they'll leave the key for you." ___________________________________________________
Paper is not dead!
____________________________________________________ When the Jones family moved into their new house, a visiting relative asked the little five-year-old how he liked the new place. "It's really cool," he said. "I have my own room, Mike has his own room, and Jamie has her own room. Only mom still has to bunk with dad." ____________________________________________________ Most women would rather have beauty than brains, because beauty gets them close enough that men stop thinking anyway. ____________________________________________________
A man with a passion for travel and photography.

Today, February 12, in
1541 The city of Santiago, Chile was founded. 
1554 Lady Jane Grey was beheaded after being charged with 
 treason. She had claimed the throne of England for 9 days. 
1733 Savannah, GA, was founded by English colonist 
 James Oglethorpe. 
1878 Frederick W. Thayer patented the baseball catcher’s mask. 
1879 The first artificial ice rink opened in North America. 
 It was at Madison Square Garden in New York City, NY. 
1907 A collision of the steamer Larchmont and a schooner 
 resulted in the death of more than 300 people. The incident 
 occurred off New England's Block Island. 
1909 The National Association for the Advancement of Colored 
 People (NAACP) was founded. 
1912 China's boy emperor Hsuan T'ung announced that he was 
 abdicating, ending the Manchu Ch'ing dynasty. Subsequently, 
 the Republic of China was established. 
1918 All theatres in New York City were shut down in an effort 
 to conserve coal. 
1940 Mutual Radio presented the first broadcast of the radio 
 play "The Adventures of Superman." 
1971 James Cash (J.C.) Penney died at the age of 95. The company 
 closed for business for one-half day as a memorial to the 
 company's founder. 
1973 The State of Ohio went metric, becoming the first in the 
 U.S. to post metric distance signs. 
1973 American prisoners of war were released for the first time 
 during the Vietnam conflict. 
1993 In Liverpool, England, a 2-year-old boy, James Bulger, was 
 lured away from his mother at a shopping mall and beaten to 
 death. Two ten-year-old boys were responsible. 
1998 A U.S. federal judge declared that the presidential line-item 
 veto was unconstitutional. 
2001 The space probe NEAR landed on the asteroid Eros. It was the 
 first time that any craft had landed on a small space rock. 
2002 Kenneth Lay, former Enron CEO, exercised his constitutional 
 rights and refused to testify to the U.S. Congress about the 
 collapse of Enron. 
2002 Princess Stephanie of Monaco and Franco Knie won a 
 defamation-of-character lawsuit against the Swiss magazine 
 "Facts." The case involved a photomontage created by the magazine. 
2003 The U.N. nuclear agency declared North Korea in violation of 
 international treaties. The complaint was sent to the Security 
2004 Mattel announced that "Barbie" and "Ken" were breaking up. The 
 dolls had met on the set of their first television commercial 
 together in 1961. 
2013 North Korea conducted its third underground nuclear test. 
2015  smiled.

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