Good Morning, ,
Today is Sunday, June 12
Thank you, Gordon!!!

From 2012
Today is Tuesday, June 12, 2012
I had to laugh when Lillemor sent me an article about the 
Dept Of Justice getting frantic and trying to forbid
Florida dumping names of dead people off their voting
rolls. Apparently those tens of thousands of ghost voters
are absolutely necessary for Obama to win, and ghost
voters have worked fine in Illinois. 
Obama apparently is entitled to them!

There is one way to correct that. Leave them on the voters
rolls, but redline them.  Whenever a live person shows up
to vote for a ghost, arrest them and throw them into the
slammer for voting fraud.

Florida could easily enough make an Arpaio style tent jail
in the Everglades, guarded by alligators. And keep them
there until they come up with $100,000 bail money or a
$10,000 summary conviction fine. 

If they use the same trick with all the illegals, who were
put onto the election rolls, the fines would get the
state out of debt!

Or would that make too much sense?

Have FUN!

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's International Bonehead Award: Resort Guest Doused Boy, 7, With Vodka, kicked cops Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, June 10, in 1099 - Crusade leaders visited the Mount of Olives where they met a hermit who urged them to assault Jerusalem. More of what happened on this day in history. ______________________________________________________ I have noticed that the people who are late are often so much jollier than the people who have to wait for them. --- E. V. Lucas Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city. --- George Burns _____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Bubba & Earl were in the local bar enjoying a beer when they decided to get in on the weekly charity raffle. They bought five tickets each at a dollar a pop. The following week, when the raffle was drawn, each had won a prize. Earl won 1st prize, a year's supply of gourmet spaghetti sauce and extra-long spaghetti. Bubba won 6th prize, a toilet brush. About a week or so had passed when the men met back in the neighborhood bar for a couple of beers. Bubba asked Earl how he liked his prize, to which Earl replied, "Great, I love spaghetti! How about you, how's that toilet brush?" "Not so good," replied Bubba, "I reckon I'm gonna go back to paper."
http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
Groan! This man walked into a Fifth Avenue bank and said to the guard, "Pardon me. I'd like to talk with the fella who arranges loans. The guard replied, "I'm sorry but the loan arranger is out to lunch." "In that case," the man said, "I'd like to talk to Tonto!" ______________________________________________________ A man phones a mental hospital and asks the receptionist if there is anybody in Room 27. She goes and checks, and comes back to the phone, telling him No, the room is empty. "Good," says the man. "That means I must have really escaped." ______________________________________________________ From FB ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!
______________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Resort Guest Doused Boy, 7, With Vodka, kicked cops Roseanna Marie Kiser, 33, North Carolina A hotel guest swigging from a liquor bottle while at the pool of a waterfront Florida resort allegedly poured vodka “directly into the eyes and face” of a seven-year-old boy who splashed water near her, according to police. As detailed in arrest affidavits, Roseanna Marie Kiser, a 33-year-old North Carolina resident, was at the Sheraton Sand Key Resort in Clearwater Monday evening when she tangled with the underage victim. Kiser, police allege, was intoxicated and “drinking from a vodka bottle” while several young children “were also swimming and playing” in the pool (seen below). Kiser reportedly became angry at the seven-year-old boy “because he was splashing water near her.” So, cops charge, she “opened her bottle of vodka and poured some of its liquid contents directly into the eyes and face” of the child. Kiser then allegedly grabbed the boy by the chest and pushed him “further away from her into the water in the pool.” Responding to a 911 call, Clearwater Police Department officers confronted Kiser (pictured above) in her hotel room. After being told multiple times that she was being ejected from the premises by hotel management, Kiser fought with cops, elbowing and kicking officers in the head, neck, and chest,” according to a felony complaint accusing her of resisting an officer with violence. During the struggle with Kiser, one patrolman was repeatedly kicked in the groin by the suspect. As a result, she was charged with battery on a law enforcement officer, a felony. Kiser is also facing a felony child abuse charge. Kiser was freed from jail yesterday morning after posting a $12,750 bond. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Leslie RE: Kasperski Dear Webby, I’ve come to the point of needing virus protection, Sad but true Do you use Kasperski, if not what do you use I run Windows 8 (I think) Hope your eyes are doing good Peace to you my friend… Dear Leslie I use McAfee. I used Kasperski briefly, just to try it out, but went back to McAfee in less than a month. Kasperski was not suitable for me. Just go to http://webby.com/mac and get about 50% off regular price. To see which version of Windows you got, hold down the Windows key, and hit the PAUSE key. After a while the Systems Info page opens and tells you near the top which version of Windows you got installed. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ Two old Jewish men are strolling down the street one day when they happen to walk by a Catholic church. They see a big sign posted that says, "Convert to Catholicism and get $100." One of the Jewish men stops walking and stares at the sign. His friend turns to him and says, "Murray, what's going on?" "Abe," replies Murray, "I'm thinking of doing it." Abe says, "What are you, crazy?" Murray thinks for a minute and says, "Abe, I'm going to do it." With that, Murray strides purposefully into the church and comes out twenty minutes later with a big grin on his face. "So," asks Abe, "did you get your hundred dollars?" Murray looks up at him and says, "Is money all that you Jews ever think of? I bet you want to borrow it now!" ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Recipe: Three Ingredient Pumpkin Spice Cupcakes By Eileen M. [56 Posts, 240 Comments] This is the easiest cupcake recipe I've ever used and the cupcakes are SO moist! Ingredients: 1 box spice cake mix 1 can (15 oz.) pumpkin (NOT pumpkin pie filling) 1/4 cup water cupcake pan cupcake papers non-stick spray Directions: Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Prepare cupcake pan with papers. Spray each paper with non-stick spray inside the papers. Mix by hand spice cake mix, pumpkin, and water. Stir until well mixed. Mixture is much heavier than "normal" cupcakes. Spoon or scoop batter into prepared cupcake pans. Bake for 20 minutes; let cool in pan for 5 minutes, then finish cooling on wire rack. Frost with cream cheese frosting, regular vanilla frosting, or sprinkle powdered sugar on them. Store in covered container. These are supposed to freeze well, but we've never had any last that long! Servings:30 regular size cupcakes Prep Time:5 to 10 Minutes Cooking Time:20 Minutes Source: My math tutor By Eileen from Elk Grove, CA ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Thanks to Shirley M for this one: One hot July day we found an old straggly cat at the door. She was a sorry sight. Starving, dirty, smelled terrible, skinny and hair all matted down. We felt sorry for her and put her in a carrier and took her to the vet. She had no name so we named her Pussycat. The vet decided to keep her for a day or so and said he would let us know when we could come and get her. My husband, [the complainer] said: "OK, but don't forget to wash her, she stinks." My husband and my vet don't see eye to eye. He calls my husband El-cheap-O. My husband calls him El-Take-O. They love to hate each other. Next day my husband had an appointment with his doctor, which was located next door to the vet. The doctor's office was full of people waiting to see the doctor. A side door opened and in leaned the vet; he had obviously seen my husband arrive. He looked straight at my husband, "Your wife's pussy is finally clean and shaved. She now smells like a rose. And by the way, I t hink she's pregnant. God knows WHO the father is!" And he closed the door. ___________________________________________________
when you're stranded at the airport!
____________________________________________________ A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson in logic. "Here is the situation," she said. "A man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yelling for help. His wife hears the commotion, knows he can't swim, and runs down to the bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?" A girl raised her hand and asked, "To draw out his savings before all the relatives showed up?" ____________________________________________________ Mr. Allen, a high-powered executive trying to impress a client in his office, flipped on his intercom switch and barked to his secretary, "Miss Hunter, get my broker!" The client was impressed until he heard the secretary's snickering voice saying, "Yes, sir, stock or pawn?" ____________________________________________________
Animals do have a sense a sense of humor.

Today on June 12
1099 - Crusade leaders visited the Mount of Olives where
they met a hermit who urged them to assault Jerusalem. 

1442 - Alfonso V of Aragon was crowned King of Naples. 

1665 - England installed a municipal government in New
York. It was the former Dutch settlement of New Amsterdam.

1812 - Napoleon's invasion of Russia began. 

1839 - Abner Doubleday created the game of baseball,
according to the legend. 

1849 - Lewis Haslett patented a gas mask. (Patent US6529

1897 - Carl Elsener patented his penknife. The object
later became known as the Swiss army knife. 

1898 - Philippine nationalists declared their independence
from Spain. 

1900 - The Reichstag approved a second law that would
allow the expansion of the German navy. 

1901 - Cuba agreed to become an American protectorate by
accepting the Platt Amendment. 

1912 - Lillian Russel retired from the stage and was
married for the fourth time. 

1918 - The first airplane bombing raid by an American unit
occurred on World War I's Western Front in France. 

1921 - U.S. President Warren Harding urged every young man
to attend military training camp. 

1923 - Harry Houdini, while suspended upside down 40 feet
above the ground, escaped from a strait jacket. 

1926 - Brazil quit the League of Nations in protest over
plans to admit Germany. 

1935 - U.S. Senator Huey Long of Louisiana made the
longest speech on Senate record. The speech took 15 1/2
hours and was filled by 150,000 words. 

1935 - The Chaco War was ended with a truce. Bolivia and
Paraguay had been fighting since 1932. 

1937 - The Soviet Union executed eight army leaders under
Joseph Stalin. 

1941 - In London, the Inter-Allied Declaration was signed.
It was the first step towards the establishment of the
United Nations. 

1944 - Chinese Communist leader Mao Tse-tung announced
that he would support Nationalist leader Chiang Kai-shek
in the war against Japan. 

1963 - "Cleopatra" starring Elizabeth Taylor, Rex
Harrison, and Richard Burton premiered at the Rivoli
Theatre in New York City. 

1963 - Civil rights leader Medgar Evers was fatally shot
in front of his home in Jackson, MS. 

1967 - State laws which prohibited interracial marriages
were ruled unconstitutional by the U.S. Supreme Court. 

1975 - Indian Prime Minister Indira Gandhi was found
guilty of corrupt election practices in 1971. 

1979 - Bryan Allen flew the Gossamer Albatross, man
powered, across the English Channel. 

1981 - "Raiders of the Lost Ark" opened in the U.S. 

1982 - 75,000 people rallied against nuclear weapons in
New York City's Central Park. Jackson Browne, James
Taylor, Bruce Springsteen, and Linda Ronstadt were in

1985 - Wayne "The Great One" Gretsky was named winner of
the NHL's Hart Trophy. The award is given to the the
league Most Valuable Player. 

1985 - The U.S. House of Representatives approved $27
million in aid to the Nicaraguan contras. 

1986 - South Africa declared a national state of
emergency. Virtually unlimited power was given to security
forces and restrictions were put on news coverage of the

1987 - U.S. President Reagan publicly challenged Mikhail
Gorbachev to tear down the Berlin Wall. 

1990 - The parliament of the Russian Federation formally
declared its sovereignty. 

1992 - In a letter to the U.S. Senate, Russian Boris
Yeltsin stated that in the early 1950's the Soviet Union
had shot down nine U.S. planes and held 12 American

1996 - In Philadelphia a panel of federal judges blocked a
law against indecency on the internet. The panel said that
the 1996 Communications Decency Act would infringe upon
the free speech rights of adults. 

1998 - Compaq Computer paid $9 billion for Digital
Equipment Corp. in largest high-tech acquisition. 

1999 - NATO peacekeeping forces entered the province of
Kosovo in Yugoslavia. 

2003 - In Arkansas, Terry Wallis spoke for the first time
in nearly 19 years. Wallis had been in a coma since July
13, 1984, after being injured in a car accident. 

2009 - In the U.S., The switch from analog TV trasmission
to digital was completed.
2016  smiled.

[ view entry ] ( 6 views )   |  permalink  |  print article  |   ( 3 / 27 )

<<First <Back | 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 | 36 | 37 | 38 | 39 | 40 | Next> Last>>