How to send POP email to the browser 

Good Morning, ,

Today is Thursday, September 1

By the time you read this, I will be on the way to Calgary
for injections into my eyeballs. That means no newsletters
for Friday, Saturday and Sunday.

Have FUN!

Todays Bonehead Award:
Australian Fugitive Captured After Asking TV Station
To Use More Flattering Photo of her
Details at Boneheads
Today, September 1, in 
1810 The first plow with interchangeable parts was patented by John J. Wood. 

More of what happened on this day in history.

If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
______________________________________________________ Be not ashamed of mistakes and thus make them crimes. --- Confucius (551 BC - 479 BC) A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. --- Socratex ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ A man was chosen for jury duty who very much wanted to be dismissed from serving. He tried every excuse he could think of but none of them worked. On the day of the trial he decided to give it one more shot. As the trial was about to begin he asked if he could approach the bench. "Your Honor," he said, " I must be excused from this trial because I am prejudiced against the defendant. I took one look at the man in the blue suit with those shifty, beady eyes and that dishonest face and I said 'He's a crook! He's guilty, guilty, guilty'. So your Honor, I could not possibly stay on this jury!" With a tired annoyance the judge replied, "Get back in the jury box. Old Shifty-Eyes is the prosecutor." ______________________________________________________ A woman always has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument. ______________________________________________________ From FB ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!
______________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Amy Sharp, 18, Sydney, Australia Australian Fugitive Captured After Asking TV Station To Use More Flattering Photo of her A woman allegedly on the run from police has caused a social media storm after she asked a TV station to use a 'better photo' of her when reporting her escape. Teenager Amy Sharp is alleged to have broken out of a police station in Sydney on Friday, August 19, before running away. And as is fairly standard practice, police issued a statement accompanied by two photographs they had taken of the 18-year-old in a bid to find the youngster. But the search took an unexpected turn when the pictures and police statement were uploaded onto Sydney's 7 News Facebook page. Brazenly, the first person to comment on the story and the photos was Amy Sharp herself. Clearly unhappy with how she looked in the police mugshots, in which she wore a glum expression and a red blanket draped over her shoulders, she uploaded a more flattering shot in the comments section of the page with a simple request: "Can you use this photo please, and thank you. Yours truly Amy Sharp XX" The comment, which was accompanied with a smiling emoji with a halo, was liked more than 47,000 times and attracted numerous comments. Bec Sackville posted "Haha that's a classic. Think the cops have found a new way to catch crims. Just put out an ugly photo and the crim will be in touch to give you a better one lol." Police did not consider her a risk to members of the public saying she had been in custody for property offences. She was later caught in Wentworth Park, not far from where she allegedly escaped and is expected to be charged. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Joyce RE: Send email to the browser Dear Webby, Nope, I'm not blonde!! But, could you please instruct me on how to send something to my browser? I am usuing Eudora. thanks bunches, Joyce Dear Joyce In Eudora I right-click anywhere in that mail, and chose "Send to browser". That has worked since the days when Netscape was the only browser. Most other email programs copied that and work the same way. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ Here is an oldie-goldie that was sent back to me: Father O'Flannagan dies due to old age. Upon entering St.Peter's gate, there is another man in front, waiting to go into heaven. St. Peter asks the man, "What is your name what did you accomplish during your life?". The man responds "My name is Joe Cohen, and I was a New York city Taxi driver for 14 years" "Very well," says St. Peter, "Here is your silk robe and golden scepter, now you may walk in the streets of our Lord." St. Peter looks at the Father, and asks "What is your name and what did you accomplish?" He responds, "I'm Father O'Flannagan, and have devoted the last 62 years to the Lord". "Very well," says St. Peter, "Here is your cotton robe and wooden staff, you may enter." "Wait a minute," says O'Flannagan, "You gave the taxi driver a silk robe and golden scepter, why did I only get a cotton robe and wooden staff?". "Well," St. Peter replied, "We work on a performance scale. You see while you preached, everyone slept, when he drove taxis, everyone prayed!" ___________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Use Bleach to Remove Ink in Dryer By Renea A [3 Posts, 4 Comments] Make a solution of bleach and water. Completely immerse some white towels in the solution and using rubber gloves wring out most of the water from the towels. They should be just damp and not dripping. Next throw the towels in the dryer and turn it on. The bleach will take the ink out after one to two applications of this process. After you get all the ink out, wipe the dryer down with plain water, making sure to wipe enough to remove all the bleach. Leave the dryer door open to air dry afterward. To be extra sure all the bleach is removed after cleaning you can run whites through the next dryer cycle. By Renea from Pittston Twp, PA ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
___________________________________________________ Thanks to Roland for this rewrite of a classic: One of our local rednecks, Billy Joe Bob, while not very bright, was a gifted portrait artist. His fame grew and soon people from all over the country were coming to him for paintings. One day, a beautiful young woman pulled up to his house in a stretch limo. She asked Billy Joe Bob if he could paint her in the nude. This was the first time anyone had made this request. The beautiful lady said money was no object, she was willing to pay $5,000. Not willing to get into trouble with his wife, Billy Joe Bob asked the lady to wait while he went in the house and conferred with his wife. In a few minutes he returned and told the lady he was willing to paint her in the nude. However, he would have to leave his socks on so he would have some place to wipe his brushes!! ___________________________________________________
a social experiment
____________________________________________________ Thanks to Kim for this one: I noticed my husband standing on the bathroom scale, sucking in his ample stomach. Thinking he was trying to weigh less with this maneuver, I quipped, "I don't think that is going to help much, hon." "Sure it does," he said. "How else can I can see the numbers?" ____________________________________________________ The Importance Of "Correct Punctuation" Dear John: I want a man who knows what love is all about. You are generous, kind, thoughtful. People who are not like you admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me for other men. I yearn for you. I have no feelings whatsoever when we're apart. I can be forever happy--will you let me be yours? Gloria Dear John: I want a man who knows what love is. All about you are generous, kind, thoughtful people, who are not like you. Admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me. For other men, I yearn. For you, I have no feelings whatsoever. When we're apart, I can be forever happy. Will you let me be? Yours, Gloria ____________________________________________________
medical conditions. I'm so happy medicine has come so far!

Today on September 1 in
1799 The Bank of Manhattan Company opened in New York City,
NY. It was the forerunner of Chase Manhattan. 

1810 The first plow with interchangeable parts was patented
by John J. Wood. 

1859 The Pullman sleeping car was placed into service. 

1878 Emma M. Nutt became the first female telephone operator
in the U.S. The company was the Telephone Dispatch Company
of Boston. 

1887 Emile Berliner filed for a patent for his invention of
the lateral-cut, flat-disk gramophone. It is a device that
is better known as a record player.

1897 The first section of Boston's subway system was opened.

1905 Saskatchewan and Alberta became the ninth and tenth
provinces of Canada. 

1939 World War II began when England objected to Germany
taking back parts of Poland. 

1942 A federal judge in Sacramento, CA, upheld the wartime
detention of Japanese-Americans as well as Japanese

1945 The U.S. received official word of Japan's formal
surrender that ended World War II. In Japan, it was actually
September 2nd. 

1951 The ANZUS Treaty, a mutual defense pact, was signed by
the U.S., Australia and New Zealand. 

1969 Col. Moammar Gadhafi came into power in Libya after the
government was overthrown. 

1979 The U.S. Pioneer 11 became the first spacecraft to
visit Saturn. 

1982 Mexican President Jose Lopez Portillo closed all the
country's private banks. 

1985 The Titanic was found by Dr. Robert Ballard and Jean
Louis Michel in a joint U.S. and French expedition. The
wreck site is located 963 miles northeast of New York and
453 miles southeast of the Newfoundland coast. 

1986 Jerry Lewis raised a record $34 million for Muscular
Dystrophy during his annual telethon for Jerry’s kids over
the Labor Day weekend. 

1997 In France, the prosecutor's office announced that the
driver of the car, in which Britain's Princess Diana was
killed, was over the legal alcohol limit. 

1998 The movie "Titanic" went on sale across North America. 

1998 Vietnam released 5,000 prisoners, including political
dissidents, on National Day. 

2016  smiled.

[ view entry ] ( 6 views )   |  permalink  |  print article  |   ( 3.1 / 633 )

<<First <Back | 29 | 30 | 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 | 36 | 37 | 38 | Next> Last>>