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Good Morning, ,
Today is Sunday, January 8

Thank you, Michael!

Thanks to the 40 who figured out how to vote! 
Top ranked again!

On Thursday, January 12, I have to go to Calgary again for
Lucentis injections through my eyeballs to the Macular, the
platform behind the retina. That means nothing gets sent
out on Friday, Saturday or Sunday.
And NO mail gets answered on those days.

Have FUN!

Todays Bonehead Award:
Florida woman arrested for hitting fiance 
with plank with nails in it
Details at  Boneheads
Today, January 8 in
2009 In Egypt, archeologists entered a 4,300 year old
pyramid and discovered the mummy of Queen Sesheshet. 
See More of what happened on this day in history.
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
______________________________________________________ When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. --- Hunter S. Thompson (1939 - 2005) The advantage of a bad memory is that one enjoys several times the same good things for the first time. --- Friedrich Nietzsche (1844 - 1900) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Jones is driving past the state mental hospital when his right rear tire suffers a flat. While Jones is changing the tire, he drops the spare onto the hub cap in which he was keeping the lug nuts. The nuts are all knocked into a nearby storm drain. Jones is at a loss for what to do and is about to go call a cab when he hears a shout from behind the hospital fence, where one of the inmates has been watching the whole thing. "Hey, pal! Why don't you just take one lug nut off each of the other three wheels? That'll hold your tires on until you can get to a garage or something." Jones is startled by the patient's seeming rationality, but realizes the plan will work, and installs the spare tire without incident. Before he leaves, he calls back to the patient. "You know, that was pretty sharp thinking. Why do they have you in there?" The patient smiles and says, "I'm in here because I'm crazy, not because I'm stupid." --------------- Last time I ran this joke about five years ago, about a hundred people wrote me and told me that pretty well summed up why they worked where they did. I'm glad they are having fun! ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Cindy for reminding me of this one: An old woman is riding in an elevator in a very lavish New York City building. A young and beautiful woman gets into the elevator, smelling of Expensive perfume. She turns to the old woman and says arrogantly, "Romance" by Ralph Lauren, $150 an ounce!" Then another young and beautiful woman gets on the elevator, and also very arrogantly turns to the old woman saying, "Channel No. 5, $200 an ounce!" About three floors later, the old woman has reached her destination and is about to get off the elevator. Before she leaves, she looks both beautiful women in the eye, then bends over and trumpets a fart like the finale of an opera. Just before the elevator doors close behind her, she turns and whispers into the eyewatering fumes: "Broccoli, 49 cents a pound." ______________________________________________________ Panama Flower Market ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!
______________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Enrevie Hinayon Bendejo, 25, Fernandina Beach, Florida Florida woman arrested for hitting fiance with plank with nails in it A Florida woman was arrested after authorities say she beat her boyfriend with a wooden plank with nails in it during an argument over an engagement ring. Enrevie Hinayon Bendejo, 25, was arrested Monday on a charge of aggravated battery with a deadly weapon, the Nassau County Sheriff's Office said. Bendejo remained behind bars on $5,000 bond Thursday, jail records showed. No attorney information was immediately available. Deputies arrested Bendejo, of Fernandina Beach, after responding to reports of a fight between a man and a woman, The Florida Times-Union reported. When deputies arrived they found Bendejo walking away from the 26-year-old man carrying a plank with nails in one end which they ordered her to drop, the report said. Bendejo told the deputies she and the man had been engaged for about a week, and the man said they were arguing about the ring her gave her when he proposed, the report said. They were arguing when she picked up the plank and started hitting him then bit him on the arm and punched him in the face, according to the report. The man had red marks and bruises and a bite mark on his arm. The report did not say whether she was drunk or just evil. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Carol Re: Desktop icon Dear Webby, I put Accuradio on my computer and want to put an icon on my desktop for it so I won't have to go through y reading list to find it. It does not work the way it used to (right-click on internet address). Would you please tell me how it is done now in W10? As always, I appreciate your help and your Humor Letter. Thank you, Carol Dear Carol On the browser, I use Chrome, there is a tiny little icon to the left of the URL. Drag that onto the desktop. Simply double-click that, and Chrome will go there. Have FUN! DearWebby
Speaking of broccoli.... A couple are asleep in their beds late one night, when the wife thinks she hears a noise downstairs. She nudges her husband and whispers, "Wake up, wake up!" "What's the matter?" he asks. "There are burglars in the kitchen. I think they're eating the broccoli casserole I made tonight." "That'll teach them!" says the husband.
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Daily tip from Homemade Oxi-Clean Materials a container with a lid 1 cup water 1/2 cup hydrogen peroxide 1/2 cup baking soda Keep a jar of this next to your laundry machine and let soak in the stains for 15 minutes to overnight. I have not had any problems with color bleeding, but as always test a small spot on clothes you may be unsure of, as to not have any surprises. By Teri M from Omaha, NE
Janitor gets revenge when shoveling snow!
____________________________________________________ Thanks to JoAnn for this: Interesting 1 x 8 + 1 = 9 12 x 8 + 2 = 98 123 x 8 + 3 = 987 1234 x 8 + 4 = 9876 12345 x 8 + 5 = 98765 123456 x 8 + 6 = 987654 1234567 x 8 + 7 = 9876543 12345678 x 8 + 8 = 98765432 123456789 x 8 + 9 = 987654321 ____________________________________________________
This is just sad...
"So," Jane asked the detective she had hired. "Did you trail my husband?" "Yes ma'am. I did. I followed him to a bar, to an out- of-the-way restaurant and then to an apartment." A big smile crossed Jane's face. "Aha! I've got him!" she said gloating. "Is there any doubt what he was doing?" "No ma'am." replied the sleuth, "There is absolutely no doubt. It's pretty clear that he was following you, ... and taking pictures for his web site."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.

Today on January 8
1642 Astronomer Galileo Galilei died in Arcetri, Italy. 

1675 The first corporation was chartered in the United
States. The company was the New York Fishing Company. 

1815 The Battle of New Orleans began. The War of 1812 had
officially ended on December 24, 1814, with the signing of
the Treaty of Ghent. The news of the signing had not
reached British troops in time to prevent their attack on
New Orleans. 

1838 Alfred Vail demonstrated a telegraph code he had
devised using dots and dashes as letters. The code was the
predecessor to Samuel Morse's code. 

1853 A bronze statue of Andrew Jackson on a horse was
unveiled in Lafayette Park in Washington, DC. The statue
was the work of Clark Mills. 

1856 Borax (hydrated sodium borate) was discovered by Dr.
John Veatch. 

1877 Crazy Horse (Tashunca-uitco) and his warriors fought
their final battle against the U.S. Cavalry in Montana. 

1886 The Severn Railway Tunnel, Britain's longest, was

1889 The tabulating machine was patented by Dr. Herman
Hollerith. His firm, Tabulating Machine Company, later
became International Business Machines Corporation (IBM). 

1894 Fire caused serious damage at the World's Columbian
Exposition in Chicago, IL. 

1900 U.S. President McKinley placed Alaska under military

1900 In South Africa, General White turned back the Boers
attack of Ladysmith. 

1908 A catastrophic train collision occurred in the smoke-
filled Park Avenue Tunnel in New York City. Seventeen were
killed and thirty-eight were injured. The accident caused a
public outcry and increased demand for electric trains. 

1916 During World War I, the final withdrawal of Allied
troops from Gallipoli took place. 

1918 U.S. President Woodrow Wilson announced his Fourteen
Points as the basis for peace upon the end of World War I. 

1935 The spectrophotometer was patented by A.C. Hardy. 

1962 Leonardo da Vinci's Mona Lisa was exhibited in America
for the first time at the National Gallery of Art in
Washington, DC. The next day the exhibit opened to the

1973 Secret peace talks between the United States and North
Vietnam resumed near Paris, France. 

1973 The trial opened in Washington, of seven men accused
of bugging Democratic Party headquarters in the Watergate
apartment complex in Washington, DC. 

1982 American Telephone & Telegraph (AT&T) settled the
Justice Department's antitrust lawsuit against it by
agreeing to divest itself of the 22 Bell System companies. 

1982 The U.S. Justice Department withdrew an antitrust suit
against IBM. 

1992 U.S. President George H.W. Bush collapsed during a
state dinner in Tokyo. White House officials said Bush was
suffering from stomach flu. 

1993 Bosnian President Izetbegovic visited the U.S. to
plead his government's case for Western military aid and
intervention to halt Serbian aggression. 

1994 Tonya Harding won the ladies' U.S. Figure Skating
Championship in Detroit, MI, a day after Nancy Kerrigan
dropped out because of a clubbing attack that injured her
right knee. The U.S. Figure Skating Association later took
the title from Harding because of her involvement in the

1998 Ramzi Yousef was sentenced to life in prison for his
role of mastermind behind the World Trade Center bombing in
New York. 

1998 Scientists announced that they had discovered that
galaxies were accelerating and moving apart and at faster

1999 The top two executives of Salt Lake City's Olympic
Organizing Committee resigned amid disclosures that civic
boosters had given cash to members of the International
Olympic Committee. 

2009 In Egypt, archeologists entered a 4,300 year old
pyramid and discovered the mummy of Queen Sesheshet. 

2016  smiled.

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