How to use STRIPMAIL 





Good Morning, ,
Today is Saturday, March 18

Happy St Patrick Day!

Have FUN!
DearWebby

Todays Bonehead Award:
Indiana man arrested for sleeping in his car 
Wednesday night with meth lab components and guns.
Details at  Boneheads
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Today, March 18 in
1541 Hernando de Soto observed the first recorded flood of
the Mississippi River.  
 
See More of what happened on this day in history.
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If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
______________________________________________________ Decisions are made by people who have time, not people who have talent. --- Scott Adams (1957 - ) People need to be reminded more often than they need to be instructed. --- Samuel Johnson (1709 - 1784) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ A graduate in economics who completed his degree in the 1950's returned to his old university for a visit. He was amazed to see that the examination questions were identical to the ones asked in his day. When he pointed this out to a member of staff, the reply was, "That's true, but since Economics is the science of explaining tomorrow why the predictions made yesterday did not occur today, the answers are quite different now." ______________________________________________________ Malwarebytes for Home | Anti-Malware Premium | Free Trial Download ______________________________________________________ Signs seen around the World Cocktail lounge, Norway: LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR. Doctors office, Rome: SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES. In a Nairobi restaurant: CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER. On an Athi River highway: TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE. (and the sign is very hard to read) A sign seen on an automatic restroom hot air hand dryer: Push button for a brief messge from the manager. Tokyo hotel's rules and regulations: GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIOURS IN BED. Hotel elevator, Paris: PLEASE LEAVE YOUR VALUES AT THE FRONT DESK. Hotel, Yugoslavia: THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE IS THE JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID. Hotel, Japan: YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID. An advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist: TEETH EXTRACTED BY THE LATEST METHODISTS. A laundry in Rome: LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!
______________________________________________________ Reported by the Bausell Sailor An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Chad Kiser, 42, Fremont, Indiana Indiana man arrested for sleeping in his car Wednesday night with meth lab components and guns. Coldwater Police arrested a man, Chad Kiser, 42, found sleeping in his car Wednesday night with meth lab components and guns. Officer Sean Meyer was asked to check the man who was sleeping there for five hours. As Kiser opened the car door, in the lot at 186 E. Chicago St., the officer saw a .22 pistol. Kiser admitted he did not have a concealed carry permit. The officer also spotted several knives, plus a meth pipe, on the floor. When backup arrived, the officer located two white plastic trash bags behind the driver's seat filled with meth lab components. A meth hazard disposal team was called to remove the materials. Kiser, of Fremont, Indiana, said he was waiting for his daughter. He had an expired driver's license. Kiser was charged with two 20-year felonies, possession of hazardous meth lab materials and possession of a meth lab. Possession of pseudoephedrine used to make meth, possession of a concealed weapon — five year felonies. He was also charged with possession of a weapon during the commission of a felony — a two-year offense. Preliminary proceedings were ordered. His bond was set at $250,000. Kiser has felony convictions from Steuben County, Indiana for stolen property and possession of a sawed off shotgun. Police also recovered a number of long guns from his trunk. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: James Re: StripMail Dear Webby Greatly appreciate the prompt reply. I, as well as four of my friends, have tried to get this download to work to no avail. Am I missing something? James /i> It does work, quite nicely, but it is one of those nasty programs that require you to read the instructions. Yes, I agree, that's quite sneaky of them. Especially sneaky since their instructions are a lot longer than mine usually are. OK, here is what you do: 1) make a shortcut icon to Stripmail and drag it onto the desktop. 2) When you need to strip some mail, then in the mail hit CTRL A CTRL C to copy it all. 3) Jump into stripmail and click on the PASTE button on top. That will paste the mail (and overwrite the instructions) 4) Click on STRIP to strip the >>> stuff 5) Click on COPY and jump back to your mail. 6) CTRL A to select the old version, CTRL V to overwrite the selection with the stripped mail. Next time you use it, the instructions will be there again. Have FUN! DearWebby
A beautiful young lady arrived breathlessly at the church, jsut as the congregation was rushing to their cars. "Is - m - ass - out?" she panted to one of the slower dowagers. "No, child, but your skirt IS a little short," she replied.
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Uses for Whey By Judy Pariser S. [265 Posts, 1,775 Comments] Now that I'm making yogurt, I always have whey leftover. It can be used to replace liquid in baking, diluted for watering plants, as a starter for yogurt, as an addition to pet food,and can be added to the compost pile. You can freeze whey and use as needed. Source: Read online - various sources
Freight Train (I grew up with this version, Dad worked for the railroad and I loved all things "train.")
____________________________________________________ College student: "Hey, Dad! I've got some great news for you!" Father: "What, son?" College student: "Remember that $500 you promised me if I made the Dean's list?" Father: "I certainly do." College student: "Well, you get to keep it!" ___________________________________________________
Talented master craftsman creating pottery and ceramics pieces.
A millionaire miser has died and is completing his interview with Saint Peter. To avoid distractions, he was sitting in a bare and rather uncomfortable interview booth. At the conclusion of the interview, St. Peter asks if he has any questions. The man replies, "Yes, I'd heard as a youth that in Heaven one of your seconds was like a thousand years for us, and that a penny was like a billion dollars. Is that true?" He was getting kinda giddy at the calculations in his head. St. Peter answered, "Yes, that is certainly is true." The millionaire handed him a ten dollar bill with a big grin, asking for its worth. St Peter took the bill from him, smiled and said "Well, since you are still on the outside, the exchange rate works against you. I'll have to crank up the big computer to figure out if we have anything that small. Just wait in that interview booth, I'll be back in few minutes."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
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Today on March 18
0037 The Roman Senate annuls Tiberius’ will and proclaims
Caligula emperor. 

1123 The first Lateran Council (9th ecumenical council)
opened in Rome. 

1190 Crusaders killed 57 Jews in Bury St. Edmonds England. 

1532 The English parliament banned payments by English
church to Rome. 

1541 Hernando de Soto observed the first recorded flood of
the Mississippi River. 

1583 Dutch States General & Anjou signed a treaty. 

1673 Lord Berkley sold his half of New Jersey to the
Quakers. 

1692 William Penn was deprived of his governing powers. 

1766 Britain repealed the Stamp Act. 

1813 David Melville patented the gas streetlight. 

1818 The U.S. Congress approved the first pensions for
government service. 

1834 The first railroad tunnel in the U.S. was completed.
The work was in Pennsylvania. 

1835 Charles Darwin left Santiago Chile on his way to
Portillo Pass. 

1850 Henry Wells & William Fargo founded American Express. 

1865 The Congress of the Confederate States of America
adjourned for the last time. 

1874 Hawaii signed a treaty giving exclusive trading rights
with the islands to the U.S. 

1881 Barnum and Bailey's Greatest Show on Earth opened in
Madison Square Gardens. 

1891 Britain became linked to the continent of Europe by
telephone. 

1899 Phoebe, a moon of the planet Saturn, was discovered. 

1900 Ajax (Amsterdam Football Club) was formed. 

1902 In Turkey, the Sultan granted a German syndicate the
first concession to access Baghdad by rail. 

1903 France dissolved the Catholic religious orders. 

1909 Einar Dessau of Denmark used a short wave transmitter
to become the first person to broadcast as a "ham" operator.


1911 Theodore Roosevelt opened the Roosevelt Dam in Arizona.
It was the largest dam in the U.S. at the time. 

1911 North Dakota enacted a hail insurance law. 

1913 Greek King George I was killed by an assassin.
Constantine I succeeded him. 

1916 Russia countered the Verdun assault with an attack at
Lake Naroch. The Russians lost 100,000 men and the Germans
lost 20,000. 

1917 The Germans sank the U.S. ships, City of Memphis,
Vigilante and the Illinois, without any warning. 

1919 The Order of DeMolay was established in Kansas City. 

1920 Greece adopted the Gregorian calendar. 

1921 Poland was enlarged with the second Peace of Riga. 

1921 The steamer "Hong Koh" ran aground off of Swatow China.
Over 1,000 people were killed. 

1922 Mohandas K. Gandhi was sentenced to six years in prison
for civil disobedience in India. He served only 2 years of
the sentence. 

1931 Schick Inc. displayed the first electric shaver. 

1937 More than 400 people, mostly children, were killed in a
gas explosion at a school in New London, TX. 

1938 Mexico took control of all foreign-owned oil properties
on its soil. 

1938 New York first required serological blood tests of
pregnant women. 

1940 Adolf Hitler and Benito Mussolini held a meeting at the
Brenner Pass. The Italian dictator agreed to join in
Germany's war against France and Britain during the meeting.


1942 The third military draft began in the U.S. because of
World War II. 

1943 The Reich called off its offensive in Caucasus. 

1943 American forces took Gafsa in Tunisia. 

1944 The Russians reached the Rumanian border in the Balkans
during World War II. 

1945 1,250 U.S. bombers attacked Berlin. 

1945 Maurice "Rocket" Richard became the first National
Hockey League (NHL) player to score 50 goals. 

1948 France, Great Britain, and Benelux signed the Treaty of
Brussels. 

1949 The North Atlantic Treaty Organization (NATO) was
ratified. 

1950 Nationalist troops landed on the mainland of China and
capture Communist held Sungmen. 

1952 In Philadelphia, PA, the first plastic lenses were
fitted for a cataract patient. 

1953 An earthquake hit West Turkey killing 250 people. 

1954 RKO Pictures was sold for $23,489,478. It became the
first motion picture studio to be owned by an individual.
The person was Howard Hughes. 

1959 U.S. President Eisenhower signed the Hawaii statehood
bill. 

1962 French and Algerian rebels agreed to a truce. 

1963 France performed an underground nuclear test at Ecker
Algeria. 

1963 The U.S. Supreme Court handed down the Miranda decision
concerning legal council for defendants. 

1965 Cosmonaut Alexei Leonov became the first man to
spacewalk when he left the Voskhod II space capsule while in
orbit around the Earth. He was outside the spacecraft for
about 20 minutes. 

1966 The government of Indonesia was formed by General
Suharto. 

1966 Scott Paper began selling paper dresses for $1. 

1968 The U.S. Congress repealed the requirement for a gold
reserve. 

1969 U.S. President Nixon authorizes Operation Menue. It was
the ‘secret’ bombing of Cambodia. Cambodians noticed.

1970 The U.S. Postal Service experienced the first postal
strike. 

1971 U.S. helicopters airlifted 1,000 South Vietnamese
soldiers out of Laos. 

1971 A landslide in Lake Yanahuani, Chungar Peru, killed
200. 

1974 Most of the Arab oil-producing nations ended their
five-month embargo against the United States, Europe and
Japan. 

1975 Saigon abandoned most of the Central Highlands of
Vietnam to Hanoi. 

1975 The Kurds ended their fight against Iraq. 

1977 Vietnam turned over an MIA to a U.S. delegation. 

1980 The Vostok rocket exploded on the launch pad killing
50. 

1981 The U.S. disclosed that there were biological weapons
tested in Texas in 1966. 

1986 Buckingham Palace announced the engagement of Prince
Andrew to Sarah Ferguson. 

1986 The U.S. Treasury Department announced that a clear,
polyester thread was to be woven into bills in an effort to
thwart counterfeiters. 

1987 The U.S. performed nuclear tests at a Nevada test site.

1990 Thirteen paintings were stolen from the Isabella
Stewart Gardner Museum in Boston. The value was $100 million
making it the largest art robbery in history. 

1989 A 4,400-year-old mummy was discovered at the Pyramid of
Cheops in Egypt. 

1990 The first free elections took place in East Germany. 

1990 In Tampa, FL, a little league player was killed after
being hit with a pitch. 

1992 Leona Hemsly was sentenced to 4 years in prison for tax
evasion. 

1992 White South Africans voted for constitutional reforms
that would give legal equality to blacks. 

1994 Zsa Zsa Gabor filed for bankruptcy. 

1997 A Russian AN-24 crashed killing 50 people. 

2003 China's new president, Hu Jintao, announced that his
country must deepen reforms and raise living standards of
workers and farmers.

2017  smiled.


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