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Good Morning, ,
Today is Saturday, March 3

We got another 10 inches of snow. 
No Gullible warming here, same as almost everywhere.

Have FUN!

Todays Bonehead Award:
Brooklyn woman busted for poisoning her friend’s 
cheesecake in bid to steal her identity
Today, March 3 in
1945 At the end of World War II Finland switched sides to the winning
side before the war was completely over and declared war on the Axis.
They had asked Germany to help them against the invading Russians, and
now demanded that all Germans quickly leave before the war was
completely over.
See More of what happened on this day in history.
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
______________________________________________________ Fortune can, for her pleasure, fools advance, And toss them on the wheels of Chance. --- Juvenal (55 AD - 127 AD) When men are pure, laws are useless; when men are corrupt, laws are broken. --- Benjamin Disraeli (1804 - 1881) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Official sign near door: Door Alarmed. Handprinted sign nearby: Window frightened. ______________________________________________________ A salesman is driving down a country road when he sees a young kid in front of a barn. On the barn are 5 targets with arrows in the bulls eye of each target. Screeching to a stop he runs out to the kid amazed that this kid could shoot so well. "Son," he says, "how did you hit all those bulls eyes?" "Well sir," the boy replied, "I take the arrow and lick my fingers like this, then I take my fingers and straiten the feathers like this, take aim with my hand against my cheek, let go and where ever the arrow hits, I draw a bulls eye." _____________________________________________________ Malwarebytes for Home | Anti-Malware Premium | Free Trial Download ______________________________________________________ Watch out, Bullwinkle! _____________________________________________________
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_____________________________________________________ Ronald Reagan: "Here's my strategy on the Cold War: We win, they lose." - Ronald Reagan "The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help." - Ronald Reagan "The trouble with our liberal friends is not that they're ignorant: It's just that they know so much that isn't so." - Ronald Reagan "Of the four wars in my lifetime none came about because the U.S. was too strong." - Ronald Reagan "I have wondered at times about what the Ten Commandment's would have looked like if Moses had run them through the U.S. Congress." - Ronald Reagan "The taxpayer: That's someone who works for the federal government but doesn't have to take the civil service examination." - Ronald Reagan "Government is like a baby: An alimentary canal with a big appetite at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other." - Ronald Reagan "The nearest thing to eternal life we will ever see on this earth is a government program." - Ronald Reagan "I've laid down the law, though, to everyone from now on about anything that happens: no matter what time it is, wake me, even if it's in the middle of a Cabinet meeting." - Ronald Reagan "It has been said that politics is the second oldest profession. I have learned that it bears a striking resemblance to the first." - Ronald Reagan "Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it." - Ronald Reagan "Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book." - Ronald Reagan "No arsenal, or no weapon in the arsenals of the world, is so formidable as the will and moral courage of free men and women. - Ronald Reagan "If we ever forget that we're one nation under God, then we will be a nation gone under." - Ronald Reagan _____________________________________________________ Reported by the Bausell Sailor: An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Viktoria Nasyrova, 42, Brooklyn, New York Brooklyn woman busted for poisoning her friend’s cheesecake in bid to steal her identity Russian fugitive 'who fled to Brooklyn to escape murder charges' is accused of poisoning her look-alike with cheesecake in an attempt to steal her identity Viktoria Nasyrova was arraigned Tuesday on a 10-count indictment with charges including attempted murder, burglary and assault Accused of trying to murder her look-alike with tranquilizer-laced cheesecake Olga Tsvyk, was found passed out with pills around her to look like suicide Arrested March 20, 2017 after being tracked down after three years on the run She is also wanted in Russia for allegedly murdering Alla Alekseenko, 54, in 2014 A Russian fugitive with a taste for expensive furs has been accused of poisoning her look-alike with a cheesecake and then stealing her identity and other property and hiding out in the United States. Viktoria Nasyrova was arraigned Tuesday on a 10-count indictment including charges of attempted murder, burglary, assault and others. The 42-year-old was arrested March 20, 2017 in Brooklyn after finally being tracked down due to her latest alleged crime. Her lawyer declined to comment on the charges. Nasayrova is also accused of fleeing to New York in 2014 after allegedly killing another woman and seducing the lead detective in her prosecution. Prosecutors say Nasyrova visited the Queens home of the fellow Russian speaking victim Olga Tsvyk in 2016 bearing a cheesecake tainted with phenazepam, a powerful Russian-made tranquilizer. The 35-year-old victim, who bares a striking resemblance to Nasayrova, ate the cheesecake, became ill and passed out, prosecutors said. She was found the next day on her bed unconscious and dressed in lingerie with pills scattered about as if she tried to kill herself. The victim later realized her passport, employment card, a gold ring and cash were missing. If convicted, Nasyrova faces up to 25 years in prison. Nasayrova is also wanted in Russia for the slaying of a Alla Alekseenko, 54, whose remains were found burned and buried two miles from her home in Krasnodar. The victim's body was spotted in the front seat of Nasyrova's car by traffic cameras, exclusively revealed when she was arrested in 2017. Investigators said she was motivated by money. The victim's daughter, Nadezda Ford, said she got a text message purporting to be from her missing mother shortly after her mother's disappearance saying: 'Sweetie, don't worry about me, I'll notify you about where I am soon enough.' But the message came after traffic camera footage appeared to show her mother dead in Nasyrova's passenger seat on the day she disappeared, October 5, 2014. Alekseenko's body was found months later, and investigators found $17,000 in cash and jewelry missing from her home. She has denied any part in the Alekseenko murder. Nasayrova was allegedly able to escape Russia by having sex with a local police officer. By November that year she had moved to New York. Once settled into her home in Sheepshead Bay, Brooklyn, police said she enjoyed a lavish lifestyle of diamonds and furs, paid for by the men she lured into her life. She allegedly drugged and robbed each male before moving onto her next target. Nasayrova was eventually tracked down last year by a private detective Herman Weisberg, who was approached by Ford after she learned her mother's suspected killer was living near to her in Brooklyn. 'A Good Samaritan who knew the daughter of the murdered Russian woman got in touch with me and told me the story,' Weisberg told 'She offered to pay whatever cost for me to track her down and bring her to justice.' Ford 'was living in fear of this woman, had already moved once and was heartbroken over the loss of her mother,' said Weisberg. The intrepid detective discovered that Nasyrova was still regularly using Facebook under a different name, and found her secret profile. 'After poring over pictures I realized the stitching on the leather car seat in one of her selfies was unique to a high-end Chrysler. I then had my surveillance team scour Sheepshead Bay until we found the vehicle,' the gumshoe said. The team found the vehicle, a Chrysler 300, and began a stakeout. Weisberg's discovery paid off - they'd located the mysterious fugitive. NYPD Chief of Detectives Bob Boyce said: 'She's a con artist who meets people online through a dating site and then drugs them at some point, and takes their property from them and flees'. She was arrested by the NYPD Warrant Squad on an open warrant for the alleged seduction robberies after Weisberg alerted investigators to her location, since Russia doesn't have an extradition treaty with the U.S. 'She embarked on a life of crime here, and we don't have the whole story yet. We only have bits and pieces', Boyce added. 'What’s incredible is that Nasyrova wasn't living like she was on the lam – we pictured her out shopping for a 50-inch widescreen TV,' said Weisberg. 'We think she was empowered by her previous arrest for shoplifting, which didn’t pick up the fact she is wanted by Interpol for this murder.' Nasyrova was arrested in May of 2016 for stealing two furs worth $532 from a Century 21, but wasn't flagged as an international fugitive at the time. 'It would have made her feel like she had slipped the net,' said Weisberg. 'Not now.' Nasyrova now claims that people in jail started to 'threaten and harass her,' according to a notice of claim filed against the city. She apparently plans to sue. _________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Cookie Re: Make an alphabetical list Dear Webby, How do I make an alphabetical list of files in a folder to use in a web page menu? Cookie Dear Cookie Use the trick with the command prompt in Explorer from a few days ago, to open a command line in that folder. At the command line type dir /b and hit Enter. At a speed that you only get in DOS, it will throw the directory listing up onto the screen. You can either right-click and mark it for copying (by hitting Enter), and then paste that into a spreadsheet, or you can type the command again like this: dir /b > dirlist.txt and hit Enter. It will look as if that didn't work, but it did, just too fast to observe. It did the listing and put it into the file dirlist.txt. You can open that with any text editor or spreadsheet. Have FUN! DearWebby

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From Cookie: COLLEGE COURSES MEN WISH WERE AVAILABLE FOR WOMEN Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before. The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits. Combating the Imelda Marcos Syndrome: You Do Not Need New Shoes Everyday Parties: Going Without New Outfits Bathroom Etiquette I: Men Need Space in the Bathroom Cabinet Too Bathroom Etiquette II: His Razor Is His. Communication Skills I: Tears-The Last Resort, Not the First. Communication Skills II: Thinking Before Speaking. Communication Skills III: Getting What You Want, Without Nagging. Driving a Car Safely: A Skill You CAN Acquire. Party Etiquette: Drinking Your Fair Share. Telephone Skills: How to Hang Up Overcoming Anal Retentive Behavior: Leaving the Towels on the Floor Cooking I: Bringing Back Bacon,Eggs and Butter. Cooking II: Bran and Tofu are Not For Human Consumption. Cooking III: How Not to Inflict Your Diets on Other People. Compliments: Accepting Them Gracefully. PMS: Your Problem . . . Not His Sex: It's For Married Couples Too. Classic Clothing: Wearing Outfits You Already Have. Oil and Gas: Your Car Needs Both. "Do These Jeans Make My Butt Look Big?"-Why Men Lie. TV Remotes: For Men Only.
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
This year's Halloween the University tracked Trick-or-Treaters according to their star signs and found the following: Aries pushes the others aside to get to the door first. Taurus will only eat the finest of Swiss chocolates. Gemini goes around the neighbourhood once, changes costumes and goes around again. Cancer stays at home and gives candy to the other trick-or-treaters. Leos plan their costume for months, then won't go out because someone else had the same idea. Virgo wears a neatly-pressed suit and tells everyone they're a bookkeeper. Libra is still standing in front of the closet trying to decide on a costume. Scorpio isn't in it for the candy. Sagittarius will manage to wander to the next town. Capricorn makes a list of all the houses that give good candy and the optimal route to take. Aquarius builds the costume out of spare flashlights and spends all night tinkering when it shorts. Pisces skips the whole thing to compose poetry to the Moon. ____________________________________________________ Daily tip from What Can I Use on Laminate Floors That Won't Streak? Find out what your flooring company recommends. My laminate flooring package said to use Windex. It works beautifully. By Vi Johnson Tip provided by ____________________________________________________ A hunting guide got himself into an embarassing fix. His party became hopelessly lost in the mountains and they blamed him for leading them astray. "You told us you were the best guide in Montana!" they asserted. "I am," he said, "but I think we're in Alberta now."
George Carl performs a funny vaudeville act on the Tonight Show with Johnny Carson.
Dear Webby... Your daily letter is like receiving good news from a dear friend. Thank you so much for bringing so much enjoyment to so many. Sincerely, Yong ___________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.

Today, March 3 in
1803 The first impeachment trial of a U.S. Judge, John Pickering,

1812 The U.S. Congress passed the first foreign aid bill. 

1817 The first commercial steamboat route from Louisville to New
Orleans was opened. 

1845 Florida became the 27th U.S. state. 

1845 The U.S. Congress passed legislation overriding a U.S.
President’s veto. It was the first time the Congress had achieved

1845 An Act of Congress established uniform postal rates throughout
the nation. The act went into effect on July 1, 1845. 

1849 The Gold Coinage Act was passed by the U.S. Congress. It allowed
the minting of gold coins. 

1849 The U.S. Congress created the territory of Minnasohta. 

1851 The U.S. Congress authorized the 3-cent piece. It was the
smallest U.S. silver coin. 

1857 Britain and France declared war on China. 

1863 Free city delivery of mail was authorized by the U.S. Postal

1878 Russia and the Ottomans signed the treaty of San Stenafano. The
treaty granted independence to Romania, Serbia, Montenegro, and the
autonomy of Bulgaria. 

1885 The American Telephone and Telegraph (AT&T) was incorporated in
New York as a subsidiary of the American Bell Telephone Company. 

1900 Striking miners in Germany returned to work. 

1903 The U.S. imposed a $2 head tax on immigrants. 

1904 Wilhelm II of Germany made the first recording of a political
document with Thomas Edison's cylinder. 

1905 The Russian Czar agreed to create an elected assembly. 

1906 A Frenchman tried the first flight in an airplane with tires. 

1908 The U.S. government declared open war on on U.S. anarchists. 

1909 Aviators Herring, Curtiss and Bishop announced that airplanes
would be made commercially in the U.S. 

1910 J.D. Rockefeller Jr. announced his withdrawal from business to
administer his father's fortune for an "uplift in humanity". He also
appealed to the U.S. Congress for the creation of the Rockefeller

1910 In New York, Robert Forest founded the National Housing
Association to fight deteriorating urban living conditions. 

1910 Nicaraguan rebels admitted defeat in open war and resorted to
guerrilla tactics in the hope of U.S. intervention. 

1915 The motion picture "Birth of a Nation" debuted in New York City. 

1918 The Treaty of Brest Litovsky was signed by Germany, Austria and
Russia. The treaty ended Russia's participation in World War I. 

1923 The first issue of Time magazine was published. 

1930 "Flying High" opened at the Apollo Theatre in New York City. 

1931 The "Star Spangled Banner," written by Francis Scott Key, was
adopted as the American national anthem. The song was originally a
poem known as "Defense of Fort McHenry." 

1939 In Bombay, Ghandi began a fast to protest the state's autocratic

1941 Moscow denounced the Axis rule in Bulgaria. 

1945 Superman encountered Batman and Robin for the first time on the
Mutual Broadcasting System. 

1945 At the end of World War II Finland switched sides to the winning
side before the war was completely over and declared war on the Axis.
They had asked Germany to help them against the invading Russians, and
now demanded that all Germans quickly leave before the war was
completely over.

1952 The U.S. Supreme Court upheld New York's Feinberg Law that banned
Communist teachers in the U.S. 

1956 Morocco gained its independence. 

1969 Apollo 9 was launched by NASA to test a lunar module. 

1969 Sirhan Sirhan testified in a Los Angeles court that he killed
Robert Kennedy. 

1972 NASA's Pioneer 10 spacecraft was launched. 

1973 Japan disclosed its first defense plan since World War II. 

1974 About 350 people died when a Turkish Airlines DC-10 crashed just
after takeoff from Orly Airport in Paris. 

1978 The remains of Charles Chaplin were stolen from his grave in
Cosier-sur-Vevey, Switzerland. The body was recovered 11 weeks later
near Lake Geneva. 

1980 The submarine Nautilus was decommissioned. The vessels final
voyage had ended on May 26, 1979. 

1985 Women Against Pornography awarded its ‘Pig Award’ to Huggies
Diapers. The activists claimed that the TV ads for diapers had
"crossed the line between eye-catching and porn." 

1987 The U.S. House of Representatives rejected a package of $30
million in non-lethal aid for the Nicaraguan Contras. 

1991 25 people were killed when a United Airlines Boeing 737-200
crashed while on approach to the Colorado Springs airport. 

1991 Rodney King was severely beaten by Los Angeles police officers.
The scene was captured on amateur video.

1994 The Mexican government reached a peace agreement with the Chiapas

1995 A U.N. peacekeeping mission in Somalia ended. Several gunmen were
killed by U.S. Marines in Mogadishu while overseeing the pull out of

1999 In Egypt, 19 people were killed when a bus plunged into a Nile

2018  smiled.

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