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Today's Bonehead Award: 

Man ate Tide Pod then destroyed $7,500 
of hospital equipment

Today, October 22 in
1797 Andre-Jacques Garnerin made the first recorded 
parachute jump. He made the jump from about 3,000 feet. 
More of today in history at History
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Rob Delaney, Twitter People with courage and character always seem sinister to the rest. --- Hermann Hesse (1877 - 1962) When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends. --- Japanese Proverb ______________________________________________________ Pete and Gladys were looking at a new living room suite in the furniture store. Pete said to the salesman, "We really like it, but I don't think we can afford it." The salesman said, "You just make a small down payment, and then you don't make another payment for six months." Gladys wheeled around with her hands on her hips and said, "Who told you about us?" ____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ A store manager overheard a clerk saying to a customer, "No, ma'am, we haven't had any for some weeks now, and it doesn't look as if we'll be getting any soon." Alarmed by what was being said, the manager rushed over to the customer who was walking out the door and said, "That isn't true, ma'am. Of course, we'll have some soon. In fact, we placed an order for them a couple of days ago." Then the manager drew the clerk aside and growled, "Never, never, never, never say we don't have something. If we don't have it, say we ordered it and it's on its way. Now, what was it she asked about?" "Rapes in the parking lot." _____________________________________________________ Malwarebytes for Home | Anti-Malware Premium | Free Trial Download ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Vickey for this story: According to my mother, she and my dad decided to start a family soon after he became an officer in the Air Force. When months went by without success, they consulted the base physician, who chose to examine my mom right then and there. "Please disrobe," he told her. "With him in the room?" she yelled, pointing to my father. Turning to my dad, the doctor said, "Captain, I think I found the problem." ______________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________
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___________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Brandon McVay, 26, Council Bluffs, Iowa. Man ate Tide Pod then destroyed $7,500 of hospital equipment A man ate a Tide Pod then destroyed $7,500 worth of hospital equipment during an ‘out of control’ hospital rampage, court documents say. Brandon McVay, 26, began ‘yelling loudly’ while smashing four computer screens during treatment for swallowing the detergent capsule at Mercy Hospital in Council Bluffs, Ia., it is claimed. His alleged spree of destruction began while hospital staff were treating him on October 4, and saw McVay trash both his own hospital room and a hallway, police say. McVay was finally brought under control when police arrived at the hospital, pinned him to the ground and placed him under arrest, the Omaha World Herald reported. A police report noted that the building was strewn with smashed computer equipment and debris. McVay was charged with second-degree criminal mischief and has been freed on $5,000 bail.
From: Carolyn Re: Crap Cleaner and Ad Aware Dear Webby I run Ad-aware once a week. If I install Crap Cleaner will I have a problem? Seem like some programs are not compatible with it. Thanks- you are always helpful!!! Carolyn Dear Carolyn Should be no problem at all. They go after totally different things and Crap Cleaner exits cleanly after doing it's work. Have FUN! DearWebby

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Kate goes over to visit one of her friends. While she is at her friend's house it starts to rain very heavily. Her friend tells her to spend the night at her house and go home the next day. When she hears this, Kate rushes out the door and comes a while later totally drenched and carrying a small shopping bag. So her friend asks "Where did you run off too?" "I went home to get my pajamas!"
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>From today, 18 years ago: The two major party presidential candidates today agreed that Americans are seeing too much inappropriate material in popular entertainment. However, they disagreed on the details. The Republican candidate, George W. Bush, stated that there is too much bloody violence in the movies and on television. Vice President Al Gore, his Democratic opponent, stated meanwhile that the media present Americans with too much sex and frontal nudity. In other words, Bush says there is too much gore and Gore says there is too much bush. ___________________________________________________ Daily tip from Keeping Brown Sugar Soft Here is my tip for keeping brown sugar moist. Use marshmallows! You can use bread, but bread gets moldy and then you have to replace it. Not so with marshmallows! By Elaine S. from near Cedar Rapids, IA Tip provided by ____________________________________________________
Hearst Castle,the unbelievably opulent home built for an infamous newspaperman.
___________________________________________________ The software engineering field is staffed primarily by men; the ratio of male to female software engineers is on the order of 15 to 1. This makes it pretty easy for women to find potential mates among their peers. However, software types have a well-earned reputation for being... a little strange. While discussing the prospect of working in the software industry, one woman commented to another: "The odds are good, but the goods are odd." One look at W10 would convince anybody that she has a point! ___________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
Cajun Boudreaux been fish'n down by de bayou all day an he done run outa night crawlers. He be bout reddy to leave when he seen a snake wit a big frog in his mouf. He knowed dat dem big bass fish like frogs, so he decided to steal dat froggie. Dat snake, he be a cotton moufed water moccasin so he had to be real careful or he'd get bit. He snuk up behine de snake and grabbed him roun de haid. Dat ole snake din't lak dat one bit. He squirmed and wrapped hisself roun Boudreaux's arm try'n to get hisself free. But Boudreaux, him, had a real good grip on his haid, yeh. Well, Boudreaux pried his mouf open and got de frog and puts it in his baitcan. Now, Boudreaux knows dat he cain't let go dat snake or his gonna bite him good, but he had a plan. He reach into de back pocket of his bib overhauls and pulls out a pint a moonshine likker. He pour some drops into de snakes mouf. Well, dat snake's eyeballs roll back in his haid and his body go limp. Wit dat Boudreaux toss dat snake into de bayou. Den he goes back to fishin'. A while later Boudreaux dun feel sumpin tappin' on his barefoot toe. He slowly look down and dare dat water moccasin was with two more frogs.

Today October 22 in
1746 The College of New Jersey was officially chartered. It later
became known as Princeton University. 

1797 Andre-Jacques Garnerin made the first recorded parachute
jump. He made the jump from about 3,000 feet. 

1836 Sam Houston was inaugurated as the first constitutionally
elected president of the Republic of Texas. 

1844 This day is recognized as "The Great Disappointment" among
those who practiced Millerism. The world was expected to come to
an end according to the followers of William Miller. 

1879 Thomas Edison conducted his first successful experiment with
a high-resistance carbon filament. 

1907 The Panic of 1907 began when depositors began withdrawing
money from many New York banks. 

1939 The first televised pro football game was telecast from New
York. Brooklyn defeated Philadelphia 23-14. 

1954 The Federal Republic of Germany was invited to join the
North Atlantic Treaty Organization (NATO). 

1962 U.S. President Kennedy went on radio and television to
inform the United States about his order to send U.S. forces to
blockade Cuba. The blockade was in response to the discovery of
Soviet missile bases on the island. 

1968 Apollo 7 splashed down in the Atlantic Ocean. The spacecraft
had orbited the Earth 163 times. 

1975 Air Force Technical Sergeant Leonard Matlovich was
discharged after publicly declaring his homosexuality. His
tombstone reads " "A gay Vietnam Veteran. When I was in the
military they gave me a medal for killing two men and a discharge
for loving one." 

1979 The ousted Shah of Iran, Mohammad Riza Pahlavi was allowed
into the U.S. for medical treatment. He had originally been
installed in Iran by the CIA, but eventually fell out of favor.

1981 The Professional Air Traffic Controllers Organization was
decertified by the federal government for its strike the previous

1983 At the Augusta National Golf Course in Georgia, an armed man
crashed a truck through front gates and demanded to speak with
U.S. President Ronald Reagan. 

1986 U.S. President Reagan signed the Tax Reform Act of 1986 into

1991 The European Community and the European Free Trade
Association agreed to create a free trade zone of 19 nations by
the year 1993. 

1998 Pakistan's carpet weaving industry announced that they would
begin to phase out child labor. 

1999 China ended its first-ever human rights conference in which
it defied Western definitions of civil liberties. 

2008 The iTunes Music Store reached 200 million applications

2010 The Internation Space Station set the record (3641 days) for
the longest continuous human occupation of space. It had been
continously inhabited since November 2, 2000.

2018  smiled.

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