What is a Chip Reader ? 



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Good Morning,  !
Today is Monday, July 18

Thanks Cathi!
Thanks Neil!

Quite a few people asked me about Casey Jones. They had 
heard the name, but never been told the legend or the 
significance. So, before putting my foot further into my mouth,
I decided to read up a bit.

It turns out I was wrong. Even though most of the roughly 
hundred different versions of the Casey Jones Ballad had been
sung by black blues singers, Casey Jones was actually not black.

Casey Jones was a hot rodder and had a reputation for arriving
on time, even when he was forced to leave late. In 1900 he was
the engineer on the fast Chicago to New Orleans Night Mail
Cannonball Express, and had to make up a lot of time. He pushed
that train to near 100 miles per hour, which was quite something, 
considering the crooked track and just a single steam engine
pulling the train.

He had almost made up all the late departure times when he got to
Vaughan, Mississippi, where four cars of a freight train were
stuck on his line, and inadequate signalling did not give him 
enough time to stop his train. He dumped the air and locked 
the brakes, and told his fireman to jump, but he himself stayed
on, holding on to the whistle. That long, uninterrupted whistle
saved all the passengers. None were killed or seriously hurt,
but Casey Jones did not survive the crash, when his big 
locomotive was thrown off the track.

Here is a record from 1910:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D6N7rkNS ... re=related

Have FUN!
DearWebby


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The trouble with our times is that the future is not what it used to be. --- Paul Valery
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

Dentist: "Would you help me out? Can you to give me a few of your loudest screams." Patient: "Why, Doc? It isn't all that bad this time." Dentist: "Well, there are about 20 people in the waiting room right now, and I don't want to miss the five o'clock game on Channel 4."
The world's first fully computerized airliner was ready for its maiden flight without pilots or crew. The plane taxied to the loading area automatically, its doors opened automatically, the steps came out automatically. (This joke is from the days, when aeroplanes had steps! ) The passengers boarded the plane and took their seats. The steps retreated automatically, the doors closed, and the airplane taxied toward the runway. "Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen," a voice intoned. "Welcome to the debut of the world's first fully computerized airliner. Everything on this aircraft is run electronically. Just sit back and relax. Nothing can go wrong ... Nothing can go wrong... nothing can go wrong...."
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Billy Rutherford,23 in Decatur, Ill Groom arrested for not staying away from bride DECATUR, Ill. -- Something came between a central Illinois couple as they waited to marry -- a court order forbidding the groom from contact with the bride. The (Decatur) Herald & Review reports that 23-year-old Billy Rutherford was arrested Wednesday for allegedly violating the terms of his bail as he and his fiancée waited outside a Macon County courtroom to get married. Rutherford was free on bond after being charged in March with aggravated domestic battery. His fiancée, who cannot be named, had claimed that Rutherford 'had been beating on her all day' at her home on March 5. She told police that the assault included striking her all over her face, head and body, shoving her head into a kitchen cabinet and throwing her through a coffee table. Rutherford was ordered to stay away from her and was arrested later in March for allegedly violating the order, when she moved in with him again. The couple, who it seems had reconciled, were due to get married at Macon County courtroom on Wednesday. They had planned to be married by Circuit Judge Thomas Griffith, who had represented both the bride and the groom in separate cases in the past, when he was an attorney, and knew about the restraining order. For the arrest, the white gowned bride was called outside, and without her to protect him, Rutherford was then arrested without any problem. Bail was denied, when she tried to bail him out.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Ellie Re: What is a Chip Reader Dear Webby What is that SD Card / Chip Reader, that you mentioned yesterday? Thanks Ellie Dear Ellie The memory chips, that most cameras use nowadays, are either stamp size SD or a quarter of a stamp size Micro SD chips. They are thin, flat pastic chips with mysterious indentations and grooves, so that they can't be inserted incorrectly. There are two, actually three, types of readers / writers for them: 1) Corded, 2) Built into a USB Plug, and 3) Built into a computer. Ignore #2 and #3. They are a nuisance, and only good for people, who like crawling around under their desk. #1, the corded type, is a cute little box with a long USB cord, so that you can mount the box wherever is most convenient, and plug the cord into the computer just once and forget it after that. The corded type costs around $7. You can glue the reader to the side of the monitor or keyboard or hutch top or just about anything except your coffee cup. To read a chip, you stick it into the slot on the tiny little box, and the chip shows up as an additional drive. Usually you get a little pop-up window asking you what you want to do with ot. Then you can drag files to and from it, run programs from it, do whatever you can do with a built in hard drive. Chips are available in sizes from 256 MB to 64GB. Currently. By Christmas, they will have 128 GB chips. Don't expect 64 GB chips to work in old readers or older cameras. The 2 GB chips are the pick-up trucks of the computer world. They work in any reader and in any camera and probably any device, that can use chips. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Making Distressed Jeans Ripped denim short shorts and distressed, artistically ripped denim jeans are all the fashion. This is the perfect chance to either get you or a teenager you know into DIY! Just look for the pictures on the net, then reproduce at home for a lot less. By pamphyila from CA http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ My jeans do that on their own. I'll trade you mine for new ones. Have FUN! DearWebby Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
"What were you before you came to school, boys and girls?" asked the teacher, hoping that someone would say 'babies'. She was disappointed when Little Johnny cried out, "Happy!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
On a different flight..... During the return flight we were given gourmet brownies and cookies. Not hungry, I decided to save them for later, so I placed them in one of the air sickness bags. After the plane landed I got up to leave and a stewardess approached me. She asked, "Sir, would you like for me to dispose of that for you?" Without thinking, I said, "No thanks, I'm saving it for later."

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GW Fallout 

National Post · Jul. 16, 2011

Ethanol's wasteful appetite for grain

Re: Camps Overflow as Somalis Flee Famine, Peter Goodspeed, July 12.

As the number of people starving gets into the hundreds of thousands, Canadians should be reminded that 6.5% of the world's grain has been removed from the global food supply as feedstock for ethanol production for carbon credits in accordance with the dictates of the Kyoto Accord.

Of the 85 billion litres of ethanol produced globally for fuel, Canada's two billion litre annual ethanol production alone removes enough wheat and corn from the global food supply to feed over 30 million people -enough food to end the current starvation in Africa 10 times over.

The next time you fill up at a pump stating: "may contain up to 10% ethanol," know full well that your tank of gas has taken away the daily bread of over 20 starving poor because the self-righteous environmentalist lobby has convinced governments that this is a necessary consequence of saving the world from "global warming."

Norm Kalmanovitch, Calgary.



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USB Hub 



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Good Morning,  !
Today is Sunday, July 17

Thanks Aletta!!!!
Thanks, Gordon!
I sure do appreciate your help!
You sure turned a terrible and hopeless day around!

Have FUN!
DearWebby


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"In matters of principle, stand like a rock; in matters of taste, swim with the current." --- Thomas Jefferson
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

A group of expectant fathers sat nervously in the hall. A nurse beckoned to one of them and said, "Congratulations, you have a son!" Another man dropped his magazine, jumped up and cried, "Hey, what's the idea? I got here two hours before he did!"
Sign: "Bored Room" Boss to painter: "I don't care what my staff told you, it's spelled board."
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to dopes all over the net. Victim, not bonehead Dopes lash out at wrong Casey Anthonys Casey Anthony has been bombarded with hate e-mails and threats over the past week. Animosity may be expected for the 25-year-old white mother found not guilty last week of killing her 2-year-old daughter, but this is another Casey Anthony, who wasn’t expecting all of this attention. This is Casey Anthony, a 43-year-old Black male in Darby, Pennsylvania. He says that he has been bombarded on Facebook with over 300 friend requests, messages and posts. People have commented about the verdict and have sent threatening posts, that he says that he’s had to clarify. “Im sitting back like excuse me, I'm not the Casey Anthony you think," he tells the radio station. Anthony has spent hours deleting the posts because he does not want his children to see the negative and hateful comments. Unfortunately, Anthony’s misery is not exclusive. Two of his sons also share the name Casey Anthony, named after Casey Jones, the heroic black railroad engineer from Jackson, Tennessee. You probably remember the chorus of the Legend of Casey Jones: Casey Jones, he died at the throttle, Casey Jones, with the whistle in his hand. Casey Jones, he died at the throttle, But we'll all see Casey in the promised land. Remember, the legend of Casey Jones will live on long after everybody has forgotten the bimbo in Florida, who got off easier than most people figured she should, and who probably changed her name the moment she got out of jail.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Sharon Re: USB Hub Dear Webby I love the Air Force joke today as well as the others. I really like the leopards too. Just wish it was brighter more day like pic so I could save it as my desktop pic. I have question having to do w/ flash drives. I want to do some price comparisons for getting a usb extension cable my port is on the bottom of the pc & it sits down on the bottom of my pc desk which had a hutch attached to it & it's hard to reach it). I can get down to it but getting back up is hard as I have a bad ankle. I keep my camera usb cable attached so I can just transfer pics & not have to get up & down. I did see a 4 hub cable on my Cloudeight newsletter that I am subscribed to for $20.00. Do you have any suggestions as to where else I can price shop? I also want to price the flash drives. What I am comparing is the cost of replacing my cdrw drive {which is not working right & looks like it needs to be replaced} or going w/ flash. If I go to flash- how hard will it be to transfer pics from my pc to them? I was shown quickly how do it but don't have one to practice on. Right now I have my pcs on disk . I have a folder titled gospel sing (eg) . Then inside that folder I have a sub folders dated for the year such as 2010, 2011 etc. Then inside that folder are folders sorted by month. It makes it easier for me to find them later if need be. Can this be done w/ flash drives? I really need to be cost conscientious say this time so I could use any places to shop & compare other than Ebay. I really do appreciate your time & for sharing & your time to help. You've helped a lot of us. Good luck w/ your car. I'll be keeping that situation in prayer. Sharon Dear Sharon A 4 port USB hub with cable is under $7 "Flash Drives" are obsolete. Nowadays you just use a cheap Memory Card reader for $9 or a memory card reader - USB hub combo for $12, and 2Gb or 4 GB SD camera memory chips for $12 - $14 Sometimes you can get really insane deals on SD camera memory cards, like a Sony 16 GB for $32, and sometimes stores sell them for $5, as long as you come into the store on Tuesday, just like grocery stores sell coffee or toilet paper for a great bargain on that day, when they crank up the prices on everything else. Personally, I stick with 2 GB cards. They work on anything without any hassle. Cards above 2 GB sometimes require special drivers or readers. SD camera memory chips are really easy to use. When you stick a chip into the reader, it shows up as if it was an additional hard drive, and you can drag stuff to and from it. You can make folders to your heart's content. The most technical part about them is putting a sticker on it to identify it, or use a fine point Nissen Metal Marker to write onto it. You can get those at Nissen The SD cards are about the size of a stamp, and usually dark plastic. A bright yellow or white fine line paint marker works best. Those also work very well for marking worn out letters on your keyboard. If your sources won't come down in price and insist on $20 for a $7 USB Hub, let me know, and I'll look up a better dealer and parts numbers for you. Have FUN! DearWebby
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An old man was a witness in a burglary case. The defense lawyer asked Sam, "Did you see my client commit this burglary?" "Yes," said Sam , "I plainly saw him take the goods." The lawyer asks Sam again, "Sam, this happened at night. Are you sure you saw my client commit this crime?" "Yes" says Sam, "I saw him do it." Then the lawyer asks Sam, "Sam listen, you are 80 years old and your eye sight probably is bad. Just how far can you see at night?" Sam says, "Maybe you can't, but I can see the moon, how far is that?"
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Removing Seafood Odors from Your Hands After eating blue crabs, our hands always smell bad even after several washings. We use cider vinegar on the claw meat, so when we are finished eating, we pour what is left from the little bowl over our hands and rub it like we are washing up. I'm sure vinegar would also help remove other odors due to handling. By Jayme from Harrisonburg, VA http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
A minister was planning a wedding at the close of the Sunday morning service. After the benediction he had planned to call the couple down to be married for a brief ceremony before the congregation. For the life of him, he couldn't think of the names of those who were to be married. "Will those wanting to get married please come to the front?" he requested. Immediately, nineteen single ladies, twelve widows, three widowers, and two single men stepped to the front.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
What's the matter?" asked one woman of her friend over coffee. "I thought you just got back from a nice relaxing fishing trip with your husband." "Oh, everything went wrong," the second woman answered. "First, he said I talked so loud I would scare the fish. Then he said I was using the wrong bait; and then that I was reeling in too soon. "All that might have been all right; but to make matters worse, I ended up catching three times more fish than he did!"

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WTF? 

Sexiest Beach Babe Ever

Be warned. The following image you are about to see can be devastating to your eyes.

If you can explain this phenomenon... we will all bow down to praise your bravery for blinding yourself and your intelligence for cracking something THIS hard to understand.



If you can explain this... then it really says something about you.



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Best way to clean a laptop screen 



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Good Morning,  !
Today is Saturday, July 16

Got the call from the mechanic today: $850
OUCH! Guess I will be walking for the foreseeable future.
That is definitely not in the budget.

Have FUN!
DearWebby


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No good deed goes unpunished. --- Clare Booth Luce NOW you tell me! Progress isn't made by early risers. It's made by lazy men trying to find easier ways to do something. --- Robert Heinlein, Time Enough For Love This is like deja vu all over again. --- Yogi Berra
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

A man from Edinburgh wrote to an English editor, "If you don't stop printing those derogatory Scottish jokes, most of which imply we're cheap, I'm going to quit stealing your stupid newspaper."
Whenever my aunt went to the doctor, she would complain to me about the long delay she always endured. One day, when my aunt's name was finally called, she was asked to step on the scale. "I need to get your weight today," said the nurse. Without a moment's hesitation, my aunt replied, "One hour and 45 minutes!"
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Shireen Nalley Thanks to Helen for sending the info. Dopey Oklahoman tries to kill store worker, that she believes is Casey Anthony CHOUTEAU, Oklahoma -- An Oklahoma woman believes outrage over the Florida murder case almost cost her her life. The 26-year-old says a crazed woman tried to kill her because the woman thought she was Casey Anthony. It happened in Chouteau last Friday night, July 8, 2011, just days after the Casey Anthony verdict, while Casey Anthony was still in jail. "You look like Casey Anthony!" Shireen Nalley proclaimed. Blackwell works at a convenience store in Chouteau and said Shireen Nalley came in that night around 10 p.m. and looked strange, very suspicious, then left after buying gas. She got off work at 10:30 that night and walked out to her truck, which was parked on the other side of the building, and got inside. "Began to back out and looked and I could tell Shireen Nalley was staring directly at me; I could almost see the whites of her eyes," she recalled. "I proceeded to pull out of the parking lot, and she was right behind me," Sammay said. Blackwell drove a few miles and says Nalley suddenly rammed her van into the back of Blackwell's truck. "I said, 'Oh my God, help me,'" Blackwell told News On 6. She then pulled into a parking lot to get away. "She hit me again, causing my truck to flip two and a half times, landing on the driver's side, and I just laid there playing dead," she said. Blackwell's mother says she'll never forget her daughter's reaction. "I got to her, she was crying, she was shaking, she says, 'Mama, this lady thinks I'm Casey Anthony and she tried to kill me," her mother said. Police chased Shireen Nalley for a while and finally arrested her for assault and battery with a deadly weapon. Shireen Nalley told police she was "trying to save the children." "She said that I was trying to hurt babies, I was killing babies and she was going to stop it before it happened again," Blackwell recalled. "She could have taken me away from my family, my daughter." Blackwell's daughter is also named Caylee -- the only thing Sammay said she has in common with Casey Anthony. "I don't look like her, so what about people who actually do look like her and live closer to Florida, instead of Oklahoma, what's going to happen to those people?" she said. Shireen Nalley is now in the Mayes County Jail on complaints of assault and battery with a deadly weapon, leaving the scene of a vehicle collision, resisting arrest and reckless driving. She is being held on a $25,000 bond. Police say Nalley seemed to be on drugs when they arrested her, however, there is no DUI listed. Sammay Blackwell wants to get a restraining order against Nalley. Blackwell also says she's struggling with Nalley's car insurance right now and claims the company won't cover the damage if Nalley hit her on purpose.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Gretta Re: How to clean laptop screen? Dear Webby When I got my laptop, it came with some dry cleaning cloths and instructions to always use those special dry cleaning cloths for the screen. I would never do that with my glasses or camera lenses, so I hesitate to try that on a screen. What do you sugest? Gretta Dear Gretta I would toss those dry cleaning sheets into the garbage. They just dull and damage the screeen, and force you to buy a new one sooner. Just use regular Windex or equivalent, and a rag from a well washed, old t-shirt or recently washed microfiber cloth. Mist the screen with the Windex, gently wipe it clean. Mist it again, turn the rag and wipe it clean again. That's all there is to it. Just like with your glasses or camera lenses, NEVER wipe it when there is dry and gritty dust on it. Windex will get between the grit and the screen and make it stick to the rag. Have FUN! DearWebby
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The chief of staff of the Air Force decided that he would personally intervene in a recruiting crisis affecting all of our armed services. So he directed that a nearby Air Force base be opened and that all eligible young men and women be invited. As he and his staff were standing near a brand new F-15 Fighter, a pair of twin brothers who looked like they had just stepped off a Marine Corps recruiting poster walked up to them. The chief of staff walked up to them, stuck out his hand and introduced himself. He looked at the first young man and asked, "Son, what skills can you bring to the Air Force?" The young man looks at him and says, "I'm a pilot!" The general turns to his aide and says, "Sign him up -- all the paper work done, everything, do it today!" The aide hustles the young man off. The general looks at the second young man and asked, "What skills can you bring to the Air Force?" The young man says, "I chop wood!" "Son," the general replies, "we don't need woodchoppers in the Air Force. What else do you know how to do?" "I chop wood!" "Young man," huffs the general, "you are not listening to me. We don't need woodchoppers; this is the 21st century!" "Well," the young man says, "you hired my brother!" "Of course we did," says the general, "But he's a pilot!" The young man rolls his eyes and says, "I HAVE to chop it before he can pile it!"
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Uses for Newspaper Plastic Bags If you get a daily newspaper delivered to you in long, narrow plastic bags, you can recycle them in a number of ways. They are great for holding shoes when traveling, so that the clothing in your suitcase doesn't get dirty. Each bag can hold one shoe or a pair of smaller footwear, such as flip flops. I also store several of these bags in a large used plastic cup with a lid (think recycled fast food soda cup that you have washed) and that sits in my car in the cup holder. They are great to use as small trash bags. I also store my kitty litter scoop in one, so that anything stuck to the scoop ends up in the bag and not in the bottom of my cabinet. By ginnywest from Murrells Inlet, SC http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
How to clean the toilet: 1. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water, and put both lids up. 2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom. 3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids. (You may need to stand on the lid.) The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. (Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.) 4. Flush the toilet three or four times. (This provides a " power-wash" and "rinse".) 5. Have someone open the door to the outside (Be sure that there are no people between the toilet and the outside door.) 6. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids. 7. The now clean cat will rocket out of the toilet, and run outside where he will dry himself off. The toilet will be sparkling clean! Sincerely, The Dog
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Thanks to Bill for this story: When I picked up Amy from school the other day, she was walking with a friend. I didn't catch their entire conversation, but she was in the process of pointing out me to her friend and explaining who I was. She said, "That's my dad. He wants me to have things that he never had as a boy. Like, all 'A's' on a report card."

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DOS icon for Windows 7 



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Good Morning,  !
Today is Friday, July 15
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!

Thank you Leonard!

Re the advice from so many, that I should get car parts 
from a junkyard: There was no luck there. My car, a 1991 
Chrysler LeBaron was never really that popular, probably
because people didn't know how to pronounce the name properly.
The ones, that were produced, are mostly still on the road,
because they were well made and quite sturdy, and because
people, who prefer sharp lines over "fashionable" dough-boy 
design, hang on to them. 

I got it years ago when my previous car blew the engine and I
was looking for a rental, to tide me over until I could find 
something affordable. The rental place was closed, but the
used car lot next door had this LeBaron, priced for a very
quick sale. Here is a picture from 3 - 4 years ago:


Have FUN!
DearWebby


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"I think the bottom-line difference between being single and married is this: When you're single you're as happy as you are. When you're married, you can only be as happy as the least happy person in the apartment." ---Tom Hertz "A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against his government." --- Edward Abbey
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

A cowboy walks into a bar in Texas, orders three mugs of Bud and sits in the back room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more. The bartender approaches and tells the cowboy, "You know, a mug goes flat after I draw it, it would taste better if you bought one at a time." The cowboy replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in Australia the other is in Dublin, and I'm in Texas. When we all left home, we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days we drank together. So I drink one for each of my brothers and one for myself." The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there. The cowboy becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the same way. He orders three mugs and drinks them in turn. One day, he comes in and orders two mugs. All the regulars take notice and fall silent. When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, "I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your loss." The cowboy looks quite puzzled for a moment, then a light dawns and he laughs. "Oh, no, everybody's just fine," he explains, "It's just that my wife and I joined the Baptist Church in Sweetwater and I had to quit drinking.. . . Hasn't affected my brothers though."
Thanks to mary for this story: I began thinking about my own mortality after I became a widow. One day my daughter called home from college, and I announced to her, "I think it's time for us to talk about where I would like to be buried." "It's way too soon to even think of anything like that," she snapped indignantly. Then there was a brief silence. "Wait a minute, did you say married or buried?" When I repeated buried, she said, "Oh, okay, sure."
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Heather Query, 21, in Indianapolis, Indiana Mom Left Kids In Hot Car, Beat Good Samaritan INDIANAPOLIS -- An Indianapolis mother has been arrested, accused of leaving her children in a hot car and then beating a woman who stepped in to help, police said. Heather Elliott told officers she saw two boys, ages 4 and 1, unattended inside a vehicle with the windows rolled up in the parking lot of the Kroger store at 1330 W. Southport Road on Monday evening. Elliott said the 4-year-old boy was crying hysterically. "He was pushing up against the window, just screaming bloody murder, just screaming, his face all red," Elliott said. When she approached the children's mother, Heather Query, 21, as she exited the store, Elliott said Query began yelling at her, telling her it was none of her business, and then punched her in the face. "She just slammed me right in the face, and I was just trying to push her away, and she just kept going and going," Elliott said. Police were called, and Query was arrested on preliminary charges of neglect of a dependent and battery. Police said it was 88 degrees outside with a heat index of 97 degrees at the time, and well over 100 in vehicles. As Query was arrested, Elliott said the mother had some parting words for her. "She said, 'I hope you're happy with yourself and you can live with yourself, because I'm going to lose my job and my kids,'" Elliott said. "I said, 'Good. I can live with myself because I just saved your kids.'" Query's children were released to their father.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Britta Re: No more DOS in W7 ? Dear Webby I held on to Windows 98 as long as I could, but finally had to switch to Windows 7 with this laptop. Where is the DOS icon ? Are those rumors that XP doesn't have DOS any more true? I'll be lost without my bats!!! Britta Dear Britta Relax! DOS is alive and well in the basement of Windows 7. Windows 7 has a totally different philosophy behind it. Part of it is based on French tanks (15 speeds in reverse and one forward, just in case the enemy attacks from the rear) The rest of it is based on that joke of the gynecologist who became a car mechanic and fixed an engine by doing all the work by reaching into it through the muffler. If you can grasp those two concepts simultaneously, then you truly understand Windows 7. That is why you can't set the explorer to go straight to the C: drive but have to slither towards that by devious routes. To get a DOS icon, use a plain text editor and make a bat with these three lines in it: @echo off cmd /T:9e including an empty line below the cmd. Save it as dos7.bat and make a desktop shortcut to it. When you click that shortcut, you get a DOS window with the prompt in your bats directory. It's in a bland grey on black, but you can change that right from the bat: @echo off cmd /T:9e gets you a high energy combo of yellow text on bright blue. If you right-click on the top bar, you can set your defaults. Right-clicking on the top bar also lets you get to Edit Mark Copy / Edit Paste. From the DOS command line, you can do many of those things, that Windows 7 won't allow you to do. Have FUN! DearWebby
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A member of the Country Club asked the lifeguard how he might go about teaching a young lady to swim. "It takes considerable time and technique." replied the guard. "First you must take her into the water, then place one arm about her waist, hold her tightly, then take her right arm and raise it very slowly . . ." "This is certainly most helpful." said the member. "I know that my sister will appreciate it." "Your sister?" said the lifeguard. "In that case, just push her into the deep end of the pool. She'll learn in a hurry."
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Use Onion Bags as Bird Feeder I save my mesh bags from onions and other vegetables all summer. Then in winter I use them to put out suet or meat scraps for the birds. They work very well. By Wilma from Rose City, MI http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
The cruise ship docked at a Mexican port during a very high tide. Everyone on board was forced to use the ship's narrow gangplank as a passageway to the dock far below. The staff stood motionless when a passenger in her 70s appeared at the top of the plank. There wasn't room for anyone to assist her, so she edged along slowly and finally made it to the dock safely, to everyone's relief. As she stepped down, she turned, looked back to the top of the gangplank and shouted, "It's okay, Mother, you can come down now."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Dr. Cutter is the local Veterinarian, known for his wry humor. He surpassed himself one summer day when a city dog was brought to him after an encounter with a porcupine. After almost an hour of prying, pulling, cutting and stitching, he returned the dog to its owner, who asked what she owed. "Thirty dollars, Ma'am," he answered. "Why that's simply outrageous!" she stormed. "That's what's wrong with you Maine people, you're always trying to overcharge summer visitors. Whatever do you do in the winter, when we're not here to be gypped out of our hard earned money?" "In Winter we raise porcupines, Ma'am."

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Where do you get the "OpenTabs" add-on ? 



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Good Morning,  !
Today is Thursday, July 14

Thanks to dedicated scrimping and saving I thought I was
going to be able to pay the phone bill on time, for a change.

My car must have been listening.

The cooling system had been a bit erratic for some time,
but I thought I could baby it through the summer, and in winter
it won't overheat if I drive gently and keep the heater
running. Well, that dream was not to be.

With a dead waterpump and a stuck thermostat and a bad 
belt idler and slipping belt, it split the radiator.
$800 total cost. 

I used to fix the brass and copper radiators, but aluminum 
and plastic radiators are made to be not repairable. 
And the mechanic, who replaces the parts, gets $80 per
hour. 

I am going to have to ask him to take me on as a helper,
at least until the car bill is paid.

Have FUN!
DearWebby


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please donate what you can!

What the world needs is more geniuses with humility, there are so few of us left. --- Oscar Levant
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

Two-year-old Paige was with her mother while her older sister was being examined by a dentist. Paige kept herself busy playing with toys in the waiting room until she noticed that her mom was resting, her eyes closed. With about six other patients waiting, Paige marched up to her mother, looked her straight in the face and shook her shoulder. "Mommy," she yelled, "wake up! This is not church!"
A minister, a priest and a rabbi were discussing when life begins. "Those of my faith," said the minister, "believe that life starts when the heart begins to beat." "We take a different view," said the priest. "We believe life starts at the moment of conception." "Well," said the rabbi, "it is our belief that life starts when the kids move out."
I believe the flower in the photo yesterdya was a member of the Kalanchoe family. Thanks for all the good clean Humor you provide each day. I look forward to your humor and advice each morning. Wishing you continued good health. Libby Thanks to Verna from Beechy in Saskatchewan for sending this picture: Click through the picture to the large version.
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Robert Mecklenborg, 59, State Rep, Ohio Anti-abortion legislator's embarrassing night out Rabid Anti-abortion campaigner Robert Mecklenborg, 59, in Ohio, known for ranting about how women should not have the right to endanger the unborn, endangered a 26 year old woman,who was not his wife or relative, when he was driving drunk, with her at his side. In a way, this isn't exactly breaking news. The events in question happened more than two months ago. However, blogs and news outlets -- and reportedly the House Republican leadership -- found out only now. On Saturday, April 23 -- in the wee hours of the morning after Good Friday -- an Indiana state trooper pulled over Mecklenborg, who was driving in Dearborn County, with temporary Kentucky license plates. The officer stated in his report that he stopped Mecklenborg for a burned-out headlight, but then suspected he was intoxicated after he smelled alcohol and noticed the state rep's "glossy, bloodshot eyes." Mecklenborg refused a chemical test, and then failed three field sobriety tests. After a blood test, he was charged with drunken driving. The 59-year-old married father of three also tested positive for Viagra. Mecklenborg was not alone that evening. His passenger was a 26-year-old woman, an escort from "Concepts" in Indiana, who is neither his wife nor one of his 3 children. In his incident report, the police officer noted that Mecklenborg's inebriated state "endangered a person."
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Jorge Re: Where do you get "Opentabs" Dear Webby, since I received such great advice last time, I will ask another one....I heard that even reformatiing your hard drive will still leave stuff on your puter, so what free program have you heard about that will erase everything? Does this even apply, or will reformatting work just fine? Thanks in advance! Cass Dear Jorge Looks like now it is called "Save My Tabs" but it still saves them opentabs-Machine-date-time.txt files, like opentabs-WEBBY2-20110713-2133.txt That file has the open tabs from machine WEBBY2 on July 13 / 2011 at 21:33 You can specify the destination and the auto-save frequency. It is quite civilized! You can download and install it from http://snipurl.com/savemytabs or from my tool box at http://webby.com/tools Have FUN! DearWebby
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A woman was driving her old beat up car on the Highway with her 7 yr. old son, Little Johnny. She tried to keep up with traffic but they were flying by her. After getting caught in a large group of car's flying down the road she looked at her speedometer to see she was doing 15 miles over the speed limit. Slowing down, she moved over to the side and got out of the clump that soon left her behind. She looked up and saw the flashing lights of a police car. Pulling over she waited for the officer to come up to her car. As he did he said, "Ma'am do you know why I pulled you over?" Little Johnny piped up from the back seat, "I do! Because you couldn't catch the fast cars!"
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Make Quilt From Old Sweatshirts Sweatshirts can be recycled to make good quilts. They are warm enough that just a backing rather than adding batting may be sufficiently warm if a lightweight quilt is desired. I often alternate sweatshirt materials with jean material. At a thrift store look for 2X and 3X sizes as they have a lot of material in them. You might want to cut around lettering and pictures on the shirts. I prefer buying plain shirts if I can find them. By halstein from Valley City, ND http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
As a passenger ship passed a small island, a bearded man could be seen shouting and furiously waving his arms. "Who is that?" a passenger asked the captain. "I have no idea," the captain replied, "But every year when we pass he goes nuts."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
"Good afternoon, Landlord, a pint of Less if you please," said the old man. "Less? Never heard of it," replied the barman. "Oh, come now surely you have," he persisted. "No sorry, we certainly don't stock it. What is it anyway? Some kind of foreign beer?" "Well I'm not sure," admitted the man. "It was the doctor who mentioned it. He said I should drink Less."

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Thoughts 


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Just Rewards 

Bill Clinton, Al Gore and George W. Bush died and found themselves standing on the other side of the Jordan River looking across at the Promised Land.

Saint Peter was standing on the other side and shouted over to the three surprised Americans, "Contrary to what you have been taught, each of you will have to wade across the Jordan River."

As he saw their perplexed looks, he assured them by saying, "Don't worry. You will sink only proportionally, according to your sins on earth. The more you have sinned, the more you will sink into the water."

The three American sages of political lore looked at one another, trying to determine who would be the first brave soul to cross the Jordan River.

George W. Bush volunteered to go first. Slowly he began to wade out into the river, and slowly the water began to get higher and higher, reaching to his waist. George began to sweat, thinking of all his sins that were coming back to haunt him. He was beginning to wonder if he would ever see the other side. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, he began to emerge on the river's bank.

As he ascended to the other side, he looked behind him to see who was next. A shock of surprise registered on his face as he saw Al Gore almost in the middle of the river, and the water was only up to his knees.

He turned to Saint Peter and exclaimed, "I know Al Gore, and that doesn't seem right!"

Before Saint Peter could reply, Al Gore, by now chest deep in the water, was shouting: "Clinton is sinking! Clinton is sinking!"

Clinton was nowhere in sight, so Bush yelled back to Gore, who was by now waist deep in the water: "How would you know?" "I'm standing on Clinton's shoulders!"




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Does formatting really clean everything? 



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Good Morning,  !
Today is Wednesday, July 13

Lots of quotes today. Some days I have problems finding even
one good one, other days I run across good ones, that I don't
want to pass over, in case I don't find them again. 

Last night we had a total power failure. The whole town was 
dark, except for Charlie and Charlene's house next door.
Solar. Even their yard lights worked. Made me wish I had
brought my solar stuff with me from the Yukon, but at the
time I thought grid electricity was cheap and reliable.

Oh, well. After half an hour the power came back, and thanks
to Auto-Save and OpenTabs it didn't take too long to restore 
everything.

If you don't have the OpenTabs add-in in FireFox, grab it!
It is free, and if you have a crash or catastrophic shut-down,
it may come in very handy.

Have FUN!
DearWebby


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"Censorship is telling a man he can't have a steak just because a baby can't chew it." --- Mark Twain "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." --- Edmund Burke "The world is a dangerous place to live, not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." --- Albert Einstein
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

Some teachers at state universities get to know our students fairly well. One instructor told his communications class of his plans to propose marriage. A student spoke up and said that he had recently asked his girlfriend to marry him as well. "What was her answer?" the instructor asked. "I don't know," the student replied. "She hasn't e-mailed me back yet."
Pastor Dave Charlton says, "After a worship service at First Baptist Church in Newcastle, Kentucky, a mother with a fidgety seven-year-old boy told me how she finally got her son to sit still and be quiet. "About halfway through the sermon, she leaned over and whispered, 'If you don't be quiet, Pastor Charlton is going to lose his place and will have to start his sermon all over again!' "It worked."
Thanks to Verna from Beechy in Saskatchewan for sending this picture: Click through the picture to the large version. This photo was taken by Sandra...the flowering plant is growing on native Saskatchewan pasture, among the buckbrush. Wonder if you, or any of your readers, can identify it. Verna
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Raymond Rhodes, 19, Centralia, Washington Burglar left his dog behind CENTRALIA, Wash. -- Rule number one when becoming a burglar: Don't leave anything at the scene that would easily identify you. Especially if it's your dog, because, yeah, that probably would be noticed. A Centralia burglar learned that rule the hard way and is now sitting in the Lewis County Jail as a result. Centralia Police say there were several reported burglaries around the city on Sunday, but at one scene investigators were surprised to find a dog had been left behind. One of the officers recognized the pit bull as belonging to 19-year-old Raymond Rhodes. Detectives went to Rhodes' home and found some of the stolen items. After getting a search warrant, investigators found even more stolen items at the home. Rhodes was arrested and booked into the Lewis County Jail for investigation of residential burglary.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Cass Re: Does formatting really clean everything? Dear Webby, since I received such great advice last time, I will ask another one....I heard that even reformatiing your hard drive will still leave stuff on your puter, so what free program have you heard about that will erase everything? Does this even apply, or will reformatting work just fine? Thanks in advance! Cass Dear Cass Spybot-Search&Destroy has a shredder in it's TOOLS section. Crap Cleaner has a drive wiper. Just use one of them to get rid of your nefarious Bingo schemes or whatever it is that you worry that it might get you thrown in jail or kicked out of the bridge club. When you do a format, do a deep format, not a quick format. Yes, I know, it will take and awfully long time, but that is the only way to completely get rid of sleazy stuff like Norton and certain malware. Norton marks parts of the hard drive as "bad sectors". For all other programs, those "bad sectors" are off-limit. They just treat them like a hole in the disk surface and simply ignore them and go around them. Whatever is hidden in there, can not be checked by anti-virus programs. Officially, Norton just hides the serial number and expiry date and some info they need for remote access in those fake "bad sectors". Actually,.... that's anybody's guess. That is why many techs get into a bad mood, when you mention Norton. When you do a Deep Format, the formatting process ignores what has been marked as bad, and checks the entire drive. If you wind up getting an extra 20 MB, then you know that Norton or some malware had previously fenced off 20 MB. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Bill Clinton, Al Gore and George W. Bush died and found themselves standing on the other side of the Jordan River looking across at the Promised Land. Saint Peter was standing on the other side and shouted over to the three surprised Americans, "Contrary to what you have been taught, each of you will have to wade across the Jordan River." As he saw their perplexed looks, he assured them by saying, "Don't worry. You will sink only proportionally, according to your sins on earth. The more you have sinned, the more you will sink into the water." The three American sages of political lore looked at one another, trying to determine who would be the first brave soul to cross the Jordan River. George W. Bush volunteered to go first. Slowly he began to wade out into the river, and slowly the water began to get higher and higher, reaching to his waist. George began to sweat, thinking of all his sins that were coming back to haunt him. He was beginning to wonder if he would ever see the other side. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, he began to emerge on the river's bank. As he ascended to the other side, he looked behind him to see who was next. A shock of surprise registered on his face as he saw Al Gore almost in the middle of the river, and the water was only up to his knees. He turned to Saint Peter and exclaimed, "I know Al Gore, and that doesn't seem right!" Before Saint Peter could reply, Al Gore, by now chest deep in the water, was shouting: "Clinton is sinking! Clinton is sinking!" Clinton was nowhere in sight, so Bush yelled back to Gore, who was by now waist deep in the water: "How would you know?" "I'm standing on Clinton's shoulders!"
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Organizing Rubber Bands Save the little plastic hanger that comes with a new pair of socks. Load all your stray rubber bands onto the hanger. Use one rubber band to make the hinge. Loop it inside itself around the end and then hook the other end. Toss it in a drawer or hang. By Anne from Memphis, TN http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ With today's rubber bands they will be too dry and brittle to use, if you store them like that. They last a lot longer, if you keep them in a water filled jar or plastic container. If you need strong and lasting rubber bands, cut them from an old bicycle innertube, but not one, that has a longitudinal split. Have FUN! DearWebby Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
Thanks to Gloria for this one: I was in the kitchen one day, trying to reach the baking powder on the top shelf of a cabinet. Being only five feet tall, I had to stretch, but still couldn't grab the box. Fortunately, I have two six-foot-tall sons whom I often call to come to my rescue. "Hey, Brian!" I yelled to my second son, who was in the living room. "Will you get your tallness in here and get this for me?" "Sure, Mom," he remarked as he bounded into the kitchen. "But next time, I'd prefer the title, 'Your Highness'."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
An expert on whales was telling friends about some of the unusual findings he had made. "For instance," he said, "some whales can communicate at a distance of 300 miles." "What on earth would one whale say to another 300 miles away?" asked a sarcastic member of the group. "I'm not absolutely sure," answered the expert, "but it sounds something like 'Heeeeeeey! Can you heeeeear meee?'."

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Gmail sabotaged by decorators 



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Good Morning,  !
Today is Tuesday, July 12

We had some very noisy hail this evening, that seemed to be 
stuck over this area. Usually hail doesn't last more than 
five minutes, this one lasted more than haf an hour. Luckily
the hail itself was just slightly bigger than marbles and did 
not do any damage. Sure refreshed the air!

Just got this from Denise: 
Dear Webby, 
Please warn your readers about the dangerous "Cyberdefender".
I have spent all evening trying to get rid of the "free trial" and 
have problems with my computer now.
Thanks for your great newsletters.
Denise

There is indeed a lot of bad publicity about that program 
on the net. I use McAfee since it came on 360 KB floppies,
but if I didn't, I would avoid any program that has as many people
complaining about it as Cyberdefender has.
Good Luck, Denise!

Have FUN!
DearWebby


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please donate what you can!

Most of the change we think we see in life is due to truths being in and out of favor. --- Robert Frost
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

Uncle Leroy got a job down at the Broom Factory. On his first day the straw boss (Floor supervisor)calls ol' Leroy into his little office and says, "You the new man huh? What is yer name?" Leroy replied "Leroy" The straw boss says "I don't call anyone by first names. It breeds familiarity and that leads to breakdown in my Authority. I refer to all employees by last names; Now what is Your Last Name!" Leroy sort of smiles and says, "Its Darling - Leroy Darling! The Straw Boss said "Now Leroy the next thing........"
HOW MANY DOGS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB? Golden Retriever: The sun is shining. The day is young. We've got our whole lives ahead of us. And you're inside worrying about a stupid, burned-out light bulb? Border Collie: Just one. Not only that, but I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code. Dachshund: I can't reach the stupid lamp! German Shepard: No. You told me to sit. Toy Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry. Rottweiler: You can bring a new lightbulb in, but you are NOT going to take any lightbulbs or any of my other toys out of this room. Ever. Shi-tzu: Puh-leeze, dah-ling. What are servants for? Lab: Oh, me, me!!! Pleeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Can I? Malamute: Let the Border collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy. Doberman Pinscher: While it's dark, I'm going to sleep on the couch. Mastiff: Mastiffs are NOT afraid of the dark. Hound Dog: ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb.Yo quiero Taco Bulb.Yo quiero Taco Bulb.Yo quiero Taco Bulb.Yo quiero Taco Bulb. Pointer: I see it, there it is, right there... Greyhound: It isn't moving. I don't see it. Australian Shepherd: Put all the light bulbs in a little circle... Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? Light bulb? That thing I just ate was a light bulb?
Thanks to Sue for this picture: Click through the picture to the large version. Awesome riding at the Saskatchewan Landing. Who says Saskatchewan is flat?? I am lucky enough to ride where few people have been and I see some sights and hear sounds that fill me with awe of good old mother nature. Sue
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Ken Bronstein, New York Atheists to file suit over 'Heaven' street sign NEW YORK (WPIX/CNN) - Some New York atheists are upset with the use of the "H" word. They're upset at a street named "Seven in Heaven Way" and plan to sue. "It's a very religious word, it has a lot of connotations," said Ken Bronstein, president of the New York City Atheists. "It's a whole conspiracy trying prove we are a Christian nation and imprinting our culture and our vocabulary," whined Bronstein. The street was named in honor of seven firefighters who died during the Sept. 11 attacks.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Arlo Re: How do you get to OLDEST in Gmail? Dear Webby, You talked me into using Gmail a few years ago, and I do appreciate the reliability. However, I wish they would leave it alone and stop messing with it. It IS pretty enough! Actually, since I handle my mail with Outlook and only use Gmail as my address, the only time I actually look at it with a browser is when I am away froom my own machine, or when I need to trim my archive down. It used to be easy, hit OLDEST, get the 100 oldest mails, Highlight all, delete, and just do that until I have enough space for a season. Now, while they were redecorating, they hid the link for showing the OLDEST mails in the INBOX. If they expect me to step back 7 GB of mail, one page at a time, fahgeddaboudit! I'll change my address and get a brand new and empty gmail account! Arlo Dear Arlo I agree, they should keep the widdle girls wif wibbons in their hair away from code and stop them from silly redecorating just for the sake of change. However, you CAN still jump to the oldest mail. The widdle girl wif wibbons in her hair didn't totally kill the link to the OLDEST page, she just painted it the same color as the background. In the area, where you used to see the links for OLDEST and NEWEST, you see the numbers, for example 1-100 of 46789 Hit that large number, and the links for OLDEST and NEWEST will become visible. Yes, I agree, it is dumb to hide an important link like that, without telling anybody. I have my Gmail set to show 100 mails per page, and I assigned the exclamation mark ! for "Select ALL on this page" and the tilde ~ for "Delete all selected ones" Once I am on the oldest page, I keep hitting !~ !~ !~ !~ until I got 50% space free. Remember to also dump the trash and the spam. That will make a huge difference! Have FUN! DearWebby
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Thanks to Oscar for this one: Our first day at a resort, my wife and I decided to hit the beach. When I went back to our room to get something to drink, one of the hotel maids was making our bed. I grabbed my cooler, but not being sure of the hotel rules I stopped at the door and asked the maid, "Can we drink beer on the beach?" "Sure, Senor" the maid replied, "but I finish clean the rooms first."
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Empty tape roll for cord storage When you empty a roll of scotch tape or packaging tape take that hard cardboard or plastic ring and slip it over the plug end to your iron, sewing machine or other electric appliance that the cord is permanently attached. If the ring is too small to get over the end, slice through the ring and slip the cord through the slice. When not in use, you can simply fold the extra cord through the ring for storage. The ring will stay on the cord when you are using the appliance, and be there for you to use over and over. By latrtatr from Loup City, NE http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
I sat there waiting for my new doctor to make his way through the file that contained my very extensive medical history. After he finished all 17 pages, he looked at me and said, "You look better in person than you do on paper."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Lisa was out driving her car and while stopped at a red light, the car just died. It was a busy intersection and the traffic behind her was starting to pile up. The guy in the car directly behind her was honking his horn continuously as Lisa continued to try getting the car to start up again. Finally Lisa gets out of her car and approaches the guy in the car behind her. "I can't seem to get my car started," Lisa said, smiling. "Would you be a sweetheart and go and see if you can get it started for me. I'll stay here in your car and be a nuisance on your horn for you."

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Good Morning,  !
Today is Monday, July 11

Dimitris from Atlantic Inkjet just told me that even Al Qaeda have 
arguments over toner cartridges. According to an article by 
The Voice of America, the US military’s Harmony database 
showed the terrorist organisation’s members argue over 
cartridge use.

The US database apparently also offered an insight into many 
other details of the group’s "business" side, including "financial 
record storage and the hiring process for terrorists" and they 
even take into account "prior experience and references".

Some of the arguments recorded were about how to use toner 
cartridges for bombs, believe it or not.  Makes you wonder what
THEY are smoking!

Toner Cartridges, if one recalls, were used in a failed bomb 
attack last October, when some idiots in Yemen sent HP
printers with tampered toner cartridges, addressed to a 
lesbian/gay/bisexual/transgender Synagogue in Chicago.
Somebody talked, and the tampered cartridges were removed
in Saudi Arabia and England. They did not blow up.

While the FAA and British air patrol authorities have some 
restrictions on passengers taking toner cartridges with them 
as carry-on on a flight, toner cartridges are sold every day 
by thousands of retailers and wholesalers like Atlantic
Inkjet .com
to Millions of end users who use them for what they are intended.

I just got toner cartridges for my DELL 1320c from 
Atlantic Inkjet.com, a lot faster than expected. 
Well, unlike ink, toner cartridges don't dry out or go bad. 
They just contain a dry powder anyway. 

Have FUN!
DearWebby


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"Real knowledge is to know the extent of one's ignorance." --- Confucius "It's what you learn after you know it all that counts." --- John Wooden
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted it on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching." Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples.
After trying a new shampoo for the first time a guy fired off an enthusiastic letter of approval to the manufacturer. Several weeks later he came home from work to a large carton in the middle of the floor. Inside were free samples of the many products the company produced: soaps, detergents, tooth paste, and paper items. "Well, what do you think" his wife asked smiling. "Next time," he replied. "I'm writing to Chrysler!"
A young private sought permission from his Commanding Officer to leave camp the following weekend. "You see," he explained, "my wife's expecting." "Oh," said the Officer, "I understand. Go ahead and tell your wife that I wish her luck." The following week the same soldier was back again with the same explanation, "My wife's expecting." The Officer looked surprised. "Still expecting?" he said, "Well, well, my boy, you must be pretty bothered. Of course you can have the weekend off." When the same soldier appeared again the third week, however, the Officer lost his temper. "Don't tell me your wife is still expecting!" he bellowed. "Yes, sir!" said the soldier resolutely, "She's still expecting." "What in heaven is she expecting?" yelled the Officer. "Me." said the soldier simply.
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Dylan Muscio, 19, in Waterton, Conn Teen posts his vandalism on Facebook Watertown, Conn. - A 19-year-old Watertown bonehead was arrested after posting a two-minute video on Facebook that shows him ramming his car into trash cans set out along a quiet street. Watertown police say Dylan Muscio slammed the Subaru station wagon he was driving into two trash cans on Kimberly Lane before posting the video online. Detectives said Muscio and an unidentified passenger intentionally rammed into garbage cans with the car. "It's a little scary. It looks like the video was during the day, and we have kids here playing all the time, " Rinaldi said. Video
From the Tech Support Pits: From: William Re: Why Eudora Dear Webby, When I use Google mail from my google home page, there is a choice between clicking on inbox and getting the less useful version or clicking on mail just above which gives the full google mail including folders etc , spell check and everything I find on any other mail program. that, of course, is not web browsing, since the mail is downloaded. Google also tells me I am using 536 MP of my 7602 MB of storage. Most of the seems to be folders and mail. I can't understand how Eudora might be better, but I was contented with Pine for sometime. Dear William Eudora and all the "full featured" email programs allow you to file mail in different "mailboxes", for example one box for your electrical bills, one for mail from your lover, one for each of your banks, etc. Plus LOTS of other features that neither Pine nor Gmail have. If Eudora is to intimidating with all it's features, you can try Alpine. That is the full featured version of Pine. Or Outlook Express. I don't personally recommend that one, but it is already on your computer, and Gmail has a nice picture tutorial on how to set it up for handling your Gmail. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Looking for something different for my sister's birthday, I decided on a pair of pajamas made up of bright scenic prints of the natural wonders of the world. I wrapped them up and sent them off. Now I just received this e-mail from her... "You Bozo," she wrote. "I don't mind having '12,948 feet high' indicated on my chest, but I thoroughly resent "greatest natural span" across my bottom!"
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Empty tape roll for cord storage When you empty a roll of scotch tape or packaging tape take that hard cardboard or plastic ring and slip it over the plug end to your iron, sewing machine or other electric appliance that the cord is permanently attached. If the ring is too small to get over the end, slice through the ring and slip the cord through the slice. When not in use, you can simply fold the extra cord through the ring for storage. The ring will stay on the cord when you are using the appliance, and be there for you to use over and over. By latrtatr from Loup City, NE http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
A man was going to the dentist to get some teeth pulled. The dentist was about to give the man some local anesthesia to numb the pain. "Don't give me any drugs doc, having a tooth pulled is relatively easy, and it's quick.", the man said. The doctor pulled the first tooth out and the man just grunted. Then the doctor attempted to pull the second tooth, only this one snapped in half and the dentist knocked another tooth out with his pliers. But again the man just grunted. "Wow, that sure is a lot of pain just to grunt at, have you ever felt pain like that before?" asked the amazed dentist. "Well, twice actually." said the man, "The first time was when I was out in the woods and had to take use a washrom really bad. The sit-down type. I pulled down my pants and jumped over this log. Just then a bear trap closed on my balls and I started running...." "Damn that must have hurt." the dentist interrupted. "What was the second time?" "Oh, that would have been when the bear trap came to the end of it's chain."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
"A new poll shows that 94% of women said they would rather have a perfect body than a genius IQ. With a genius IQ, they can do whatever they want. With a perfect body, they can get somebody else to do whatever they want them to do."

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Good Morning,  !
Today is Sunday, July 10

One of the two mystery couples, who don't have their email
address on their checks, responded. Another fan, who is 
already subscribed, but has Peoplepc.com bouncing her
subscription, apparently subscribed again via PayPal and is
not responding to Ophelia's emails. And Peoplepc.com refuses
to talk to Ophelia, because she is in Canada. 

Ophelia is learning the trials and tribulations of publishing!

Have FUN!
DearWebby


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"Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example." --- Mark Twain "A committee is a cul-de-sac down which ideas are lured and then quietly strangled." --- Barnett Cocks Ideas are much like children - your own are wonderful. --- Socratex
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

An older gentleman was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation. As he was about to get the anesthesia he asked to speak to his son. "Yes, Dad, what is it?" "Don't be nervous, son; do your best and just remember, if it doesn't go well, if something happens to me, your mother is going to come and live with you and your wife."
Some friends asked me to sit their dog, while they go on vacation. He is really smart! They had named him "Stay". It's fun to call him... "Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!" Now he just ignores me and keeps typing.
Clarification: yesterday's pictures were from and by Sue, the friend is the Eastern King bird. Click through the picture to the large version.
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Conrad Rzewuski, 24 in Phoenix, AZ Moron lasered police helicopter A Phoenix man is in jail after pointing a laser at a police helicopter. It happened shortly before 10:30 p.m. Wednesday. The helicopter was flying over the neighborhood of 23rd Avenue south of Greenway Road when somebody on the ground pointed a laser at it. Two pilots, both of them Phoenix police officers, were on board the helicopter at the time. According to Sgt. Tommy Thompson, the helicopter crew was able to direct officers on the ground to where the laser originated. Officers arrested Conrad Rzewuski, 24. He has been booked into Maricopa County Jail and charged with two counts of endangerment, which is a Class 6 felony. Pointing a laser at an aircraft might seem harmless, but it is actually very dangerous, not only causing disorientation but also potentially permanent eye damage, and it can cause the aircraft to crash onto houses. That’s why it is very illegal. Phoenix leads the nation in such incidents. Last month, the Federal Aviation Administration said it would start fining people up to $11,000 per incident of pointing a laser at an aircraft. While the FAA can only file civil charges against an offender, the Phoenix Police Department said it can and will file criminal charges. “We'll charge them with endangerment, aggravated assault, and interfering with a flight crew," Phoenix Police Chief Pilot Joe Hanss said in June. Incidents involving strong, tightly focused flashlights, are treated the same as laser pointers, since the danger of catastrophic outcome is the same. For now the bonehead is wearing a pink uniform in Joe Arpaio's not airconditoned resort, and is not getting any sympathy at all.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Wayne Re: Gmail problems Dear Webby, Since Gmail changed the look of its e-mail program, I am sadly thinking of finding something else. I mean it really sucks. I am not into Chrome or Firefox, so it may take awhile. The way gmail presents itself is really convoluted though,don't you think? Wayne Gmail is good. The browser-view of Gmail is not a full featured email program, but just intended for quickly peeking at your mail, while away from your main machine. Do I sound like a broken record? Or are you a new subscriber? There is a good comparison of email programs at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Comparison_of_e-mail_clients Simply set your Gmail to POP, and then use ANY full featured email program to properly handle and file your mail. You can still peek at your mail with the browser, if you need to quickly check it from the courtesy counter of the Home Depot or from a friend's place. While checking it with a browser, nothing is downloaded into the courtesy computer. You don't have to worry about leaving a record about your affairs on the Home Depot computer. Everything stays on the web until you get home and use your proper email program to check your email. You can choose to keep a copy of the mail on the web as an archive. Gmail lets you use about 70 GB for a free mail archive, however, that archive is not intended to be used indefinitely, and you are expected to download and file the "keepers" yourself. Once you reach your limit on Gmail, any further mail is blocked without warning, and you have to dump stored mail to get going again. Gmail is great and very reliable and has very good spam filtering. Just don't think the browser based peeker is a full featured email program. It is strictly for peeking, while away from your own computer. I use Eudora to take care of all my email, including my Gmail. Millions of people handle their Gmail with Outlook or Outlook Express, but it makes no difference which program you use, as long as you use a proper, computer based, full featured email program, not just a peeker. Have FUN! DearWebby
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When my son first start dating he said, "I want to marry a beautiful woman, a good woman, a smart woman, one who'll be a good mother to our kids, a woman who will make me happy." I told him he'd better make up his mind.
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Tape Manual to Back of Appliance When you receive a new appliance, write the 800 number on the manual as well as the model number and then take a picture of the front of the manual for your records. Then take the manual itself, slip it into a ziploc bag, and tape it to the back of the appliance, along with all paperwork that came with the appliance. If you need the manual at a future date, look for the appliance and the manual will be there. On appliances with a case to hold the appliance, such as a cordless drill, tape the manual into the case. This saves so much hassle from trying to find the information when something goes wrong and you need to look something up. A lot of service calls can be avoided if you have the manual to refer to. By one.of.a.kind from AL http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
It was testimony night in the church. A lady got up and said, "We are living in a wicked land where sin is on every hand. I have had a terrible fight with the old devil all week." Whereupon her husband, who was sitting glumly by her side said, "It's not all my fault either; she's not easy to get along with."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
A widow recently married a widower. Soon after the marriage she was accosted by a friend who laughingly remarked - "I suppose, like all men who have been married before, your husband sometimes talks about his first wife?" "Oh, not any more, he doesn't," the other replied. "What stopped him?" "I started talking about my next husband."

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Part of newsletter hidden 



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Good Morning,  !
Today is Saturday, July 9

Thank you  Corinne!

First a message from Ophelia:
Thank you Robert & Loretta, amd Karon & Charles! DearWebby gave me some cash from checks you had sent in for me. I would love to add you to the subscriber family, but neither your checks nor the envelopes they came in, have an email address on them. Please tell me as soon as possible, what address you want me to use for your subscription. Ophelia
Robert H (different Robert) pointed out that this months has some interesting peculiarities. Have a look! I added some color to make it more obvious: 5 Fridays 5 Saturdays 5 Sundays Apparently that happens only once every 823 years. I'll take his word for it, my memory does not go that far back any more. This year we're going to experience four unusual dates. 1/1/11, 1/11/11, 11/1/11, 11/11/11 and that's not all... Take the last two digits of the year in which you were born - now add the age you will be this year, For YOU, the results will be 111. For me too. And on November 11, at 11:11:11 AM, .... Have FUN! DearWebby
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Marriage teaches you loyalty, patience, understanding, perseverance, suffering and a lot of other virtues you wouldn't need if you had stayed single. --- Socratex
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

Thanks to Sandie for this story: Two buddies are fishing, but they haven't caught anything all day. Then another fisherman walks by with a huge load of fish. They ask him, "Excuse me, but where did you get all those fish?" The other fisherman replies," If you just go up the stream until the water isn't salty, there are a ton of hungry fish." They thank him and go on their way. Fifteen minutes later, one fisherman says to the other, "Fill the bucket up with water and see if the water is salty." He dips the bucket in the stream and drinks some. "Nope. Still salty." Thirty minutes later, he asks him to check again. "Nope, still salty." One hour later, they check again. "Nope. Still salty." "This isn't good," the fisherman finally says. "We have been walking for almost two hours and the water is still salty!" "I know," says the other. "And the bucket is almost empty!"
A small boy was looking at the red ripe tomatoes growing in the farmer's garden. "I'll give you my two pennies for that tomato," said the boy pointing to a beautiful, large, ripe fruit hanging on the vine. "No," said the farmer, "I get a dime for a tomato like that one." The small boy pointed to a smaller green one, "Will you take two pennies for that one?" "Yes," replied the farmer, "I'll give you that one for two cents." "OK," said the lad, sealing the deal by putting the coins in the farmer's hand, "I'll pick it up in about a week."
Thanks to Sue for forwarding this picture from her friend: Click through the picture to the large version. This Fledgling Easter King bird, took it's maiden flight this morning. After such a feat, it had to take a nap. Sue Click through the picture to the large version.
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Rhonda Hollander, 47 in Plantation, Florida Judge snapped pictures of men at urinal Traffic court judge Rhonda Hollander reportedly admitted to snapping pictures of men at urinals in her courthouse. A Florida traffic court judge was busted after a man told police that she used her cell phone to take pictures of him standing at a courthouse urinal, authorities said. Traffic court judge Rhonda Hollander reportedly admitted to snapping pictures of men at urinals in her courthouse. A Florida traffic court judge was busted after a man told police that she used her cell phone to take pictures of him standing at a courthouse urinal, authorities said. Rhonda Hollander, 47, was arrested last week after her kooky candid camera shots inside the men's room at the West Regional Courthouse, according to the Broward County Sheriff's Office. A report of the encounter says Willie Jackson Jr. was "getting ready to urinate" when Hollander appeared at the adjoining urinal and began snapping away. She then took photos of another man entering the restroom before she bolted, ducking inside another judge's chambers. Police were summoned and quickly located Hollander, who admitted taking the pictures. But the judge refused to surrender her cell phone, insisting "it was a public restroom and that she was not breaking any kind of laws," the report said. Hollander then started snapping pictures of the arresting officer - and bit his finger when he pointed at her and ordered the judge to stop shooting, the report said. The snapshots led to a mug shot, and Hollander was eventually released on $700 bail for resisting an officer, assault on an officer and obstruction with violence
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Suryakant Re: Part of newsletter hidden Dear Webby, I have a new computer with Windows 7 installed. When I open Humor Letter, to my dismay, I get only half of it and not the full Text. Usually it gets cut off in the middle of the picture. Is it a problem with the settings of W7? I go to browser (IE) for your website, click on Humor and I get the complete letter. But I get only the latest one. If I have missed yesterday’s letter, I don’t get it on your site. Suryakant Dear Suryakant Looks like you received the complete newsletter, but that your email program is only displaying part of it. Try hitting REPLY or FORWARD. Quite possibly that will reveal all of it, since it IS there. I have no idea which email program you use, so I can't really google for a solution. Previous issues are archived in the Blog at http://webby.com/humor/blog Have FUN! DearWebby
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Todd's wife bought a new line of expensive cosmetics guaranteed to make her look years younger. After a lengthy sitting before the mirror applying the "miracle" products, she asked, "Darling, honestly, what age would you say I am?" Looking over her carefully, Todd replied, "Judging from your skin, twenty; your hair, eighteen; and your figure, twenty five." "Oh, you flatterer!" she gushed. "Hey, wait a minute!" Todd interrupted. "I haven't added them up yet."
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Saving Money on Baking Soda I buy baking soda by the bag at Costco. I have one in the laundry room but don't need it taking up space in the kitchen and each bathroom. After washing and drying the plastic containers from flavored coffee creamers, I slit the labels to remove and mark the bottles accordingly with a Sharpie. They're easy to fill with a funnel and the pour top allows me to sprinkle as needed. There's one under each sink and the big bag is convenient for refills on a shelf in the garage. By mountainbrd from NJ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
Steinberg and Goldmann, partners in the garment industry had just suffered through their worst season ever. Ten thousand madras sports coats were hanging on the rack unsold, and bankruptcy was looming closer. Out of the blue, in walked a buyer from Australia. "I say there," he began, "you boys wouldn't have any madras sports coats, would you? I've been looking for them everywhere." Steinberg said there MIGHT be a few left, and soon a deal was made whereby the ten thousand jackets would be shipped to Australia at a handsome $250 profit, each. "There is one thing though," said the Australian buyer. "For an order this large, I'll have to get a confirmation from my home office. I don't anticipate any problem, and unless I send you a telegram by this Friday, the deal goes through as planned." Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday passed slowly, with the partners nervously waiting to see if the Australian would change his mind. Friday morning went by without incident. Steinberg and Goldmann were closing up shop when, at ten minutes to five, there was a knock on the door: ..."Telegram!" The partners froze. Trembling, Goldmann grabbed the telegram and opened it. Suddenly, his face lit up. "Steinberg, GREAT NEWS! Your sister died!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Old age is when former classmates are so gray and wrinkled and bald, they don't recognize you.

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Good Morning,  !
Today is Friday, July 8
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!

Rambler sent the link to this in as a nomination for a 
bonehead award. I already had one, but it is sometghing to be 
aware of anyway.
British town shut down by GeoCacher

It was a normal busy Friday morning in the sleepy West Yorkshire 
market town of Wetherby when someone working in a café spotted 
a man acting a bit suspiciously on the street.

He appeared to have a small plastic box in his hand and after 
fiddling with the container he bent down and hid it under a 
flower box standing on the pavement. He then walked off, 
talking to somebody on his phone.

This was the exitement of the century for Wetherby!

Karen Brittain, whose café door is just a few feet from where 
the container was left on 1 July, was alarmed by the man's 
behaviour and called the police, who then sealed off the area.

She said: "We were closed down for several hours and it was 
a disaster for us really, because we had been very busy that 
morning and it was a beautiful day and we probably would have 
been very busy."

A unit from the Royal Logistic Corps at Catterick Garrison 
were called. They moved the planter to expose the box and 
sent in a robot to carry out a controlled explosion. 


Well, it's not really a robot like the cops here use, but a
cable controlled track mounted artillery piece, and they 
shot at the little plastic box until they were quute sure, 
that it did not have any eplosives in it.

There is no report about the damage to buildings in the area.

Shops in the area were closed for nearly three hours until 
they managed to hit the little plastic box. Business owners 
say they collectively lost thousands of pounds. 

Afterwards the remains of the little plastic box were left 
scattered across the pavement.

But it was not a bomb, the suspicious device was a geocache.

Geocaches were a quite popular sport for adventurers, when 
GPS devices were still a bit vague. People cache a small
weatherproof container with a token "treasure" in it, at some
scenic spot, and publish the GPS coordinates on the web. 
Then other players can look up the coordinates of caches
in areas they visit.

Here, in North America, the caches are strictly in scenic spots,
that are pretty well a guarantee of good scenery pictures.
Here the "treasure" usually is a business card and a granola
bar or some treat, that won't deteriorate in changing weather.
The rules are, if you find a cache, you add your card and a 
fresh treat.

If you are at a scenic look-out and walk around looking for 
an even better spot to take pictures from, and you spot one
of those small, flat cream cheese containers jammed under 
a rock, then most likely you have found a Geocache. I have 
come across many on my travels, without ever using a
GPS unit, however, I did occasionally browse geocaching
maps to see if I could expect some caches in an area.

In England they seem to be a bit short on scenery and so
they stash their geocaches downtown and get the concerned
citizens all worried.


As you can see on the Geocaching map, there a re lots of
caches marked in and around Wetherby, but the cops and
the Royal Logistic Corps of Catterick Garrison preferred to
make some serious noise rather than look at some boring maps.

There are an estimate of "many tens of thousands" of geocache
players in England, and probably close to a milion caches.

Have FUN!
DearWebby


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Generally speaking, the errors in religion are dangerous; those in philosophy only ridiculous. --- David Hume Going to bed with a woman never hurt a ballplayer. It's staying up all night looking for them that does you in. --- Casey Stengel A child's greatest period of growth is the month after you've purchased new school clothes. --- Socratex
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

At a dinner party, several of the guests were arguing whether men or women were more trustworthy. "No woman," said one man, scornfully, "can keep a secret." "I don't know about that," answered a woman guest. "I have kept my age a secret since I was twenty-one." "You'll let it out some day," the man insisted. "I hardly think so!" responded the lady. "When a woman has kept a secret for twenty-seven years, she can keep it forever."
Summer Break was over and the teacher was asking the class about their vacations. She turned to little Johnny and asked what he did over the break. "We visited my grandmother in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania," he replied. "That sounds like an excellent vocabulary word," the teacher said. "Can you tell the class how you spell 'Punxsutawney'?" Little Johnny thought about it and said, "You know, come to think of it, we went to Ohio."
Thanks to Sandie for forwarding this picture from her friend: Click through the picture to the large version.
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Christian Latshaw, 17, in Des Mones, Iowa Dumb place to pass out Train engine passes over drunk teen DES MOINES, Iowa (UPI) -- Authorities in Iowa said a teenager who apparently passed out drunk on some railroad tracks was not seriously injured when a train passed over him. Des Moines police said engineers for the Iowa Interstate Railroad spotted the teenager, identified as Christian Latshaw, 17, on the tracks near East First Street at about 10:45 p.m. Sunday in Des Moines and they applied the train's emergency brake, The Des Moines Register reported Tuesday. Police said the engine and first car of the train passed over Latshaw before the vehicle came to a stop. Latshaw, who had a pair of lacerations on the back of his head and a bruise on his right thigh, told officers he blacked out after drinking at the 80/35 Music Festival, which was taking place about a mile away. Police said Latshaw was given a delayed referral to juvenile court on charges of trespassing and public intoxication.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Gale Re: Printer won't work on W7 Dear Webby, I have a new computer and my old printer is having a problem recognizing some of the programs on it. Open office or word pad. I can print out pictures or something I have scanned but not anything from open Office or word pad. Any idea as to what I can do so it works with these programs too? Thank you for your help. Gale Dear Gale That sounds like a typical Windows 7 problem. You will need to go to the site of the printer maker, look for the drivers, and download drivers for the version of Windows you now have. After installing those drivers, Windows should recognize the printer as the default printer. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Reverend Smith, a respected church leader, arrived in a large city to deliver a series of speeches. At a banquet the first evening, he noticed some reporters in the audience. Because he wanted to use some of the stories he told that night in his speeches the next day, he asked the reporters to omit them from their articles. One article that came out the next day, written by a cub reporter, concluded with this line: "Reverend Smith also told a number of stories that cannot be printed."
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Buy a Counterfeit Detection Pen for Garage Sales If you are planning a yard sale, selling items in the paper, selling vegetables or fruit, from home, planning a trip to theme park or fair, or buying at a weekend flea market/ antique shop hunter, buy a $3.00 counterfeit money marker. I lost $20 or more at my yard sale last weekend. I'm sure they bought a $1 item and I gave back $19 in change. A loss of at least $38 total. It never crossed my mind while preparing for my sale. Funny money is on the rise, and these are prime target spots to pass them. By igaragesale from Cabot, AR http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
The old man had died. A wonderful funeral was in progress and the country preacher talked at length of the good traits of the deceased, what an honest man he was, and what a loving husband and kind father he was. Finally, the widow leaned over and whispered to one of her children, "Go up there and take a look in the coffin and see if we're at the right funeral."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
OK, Dad, I put a bigger antenna on your car, if the radio still doen't work, check the fuse.

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Dictionary of Musical Terms 



JAZZ: Five men on the same stage all playing different tunes.

BLUES: Played exclusively by people who woke up this morning.

WORLD MUSIC: A dozen different types of percussion all going at once.

OPERA: People singing when they should be talking.

RAP: People talking when they should be singing.

CLASSICAL: Discover the other 45 minutes they left out of the TV ad.

FOLK: Endless songs about shipwrecks in the 19th century.

BIG BAND: 20 men who take it in turns to stand up plus a drummer.

HEAVY METAL: Codpiece and chaps.

HOUSE MUSIC: OK as long as it's not the house next door.



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Copyright Symbol 



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Good Morning,  !
Today is Thursday, July 7

Thank you, John!

This was originally a Bonehead Award nomination, 
but I think it is a lot more serious than that!
Amish Farmer Raided at Gun Point
Dan Allgyer, an Amish farmer, was recently caught in an FDA 
sting operation. His farm was raided at gun point, and eventually 
the Department of Justice, at the behest of FDA, filed suit in 
Federal District Court to obtain an injunction prohibiting Allgyer 
from transporting and selling raw milk across state lines.

This isn't the first time the FDA has spent US tax dollars to 
violently clamp down on "illegal interstate commerce," by organic 
milk farmers, all under the guise of doing their job and 
protecting the public's health.

FDA food safety chief and former Monsanto lawyer Michael Taylor 
and FDA Milk Gestapo raid Amish farmer at gun point:
Milk Gestapo

Have FUN!
DearWebby


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please donate what you can!

A rumor has it that many rumors are just rumors. --- Socratex
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

The bride came down the aisle and when she reached the altar, the groom was standing there with his golf bag and clubs at his side. She said:" What are your golf clubs doing here"? He looked her right in the eye and said, "This isn't going to take all day, is it?"
A woman goes to the local newspaper office to see that the obituary for her recently deceased husband is published. The obit editor informs her that there is a charge of 50 cents per word. She pauses, reflects, and then she says, well then, let it read "Fred Brown died." Amused at the woman's thrift, the editor tells her that there is a six word minimum for all obituaries. She thinks it over and in a few seconds says, "In that case, let it read, "Fred Brown's golf clubs for sale." They will know.
Thanks to Kay for this picture: Click through the picture to the large version. Sunset over the lake July 4, 2011 I thought you might enjoy this beautiful sunset. Kay
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Dillon Livingston, 26, of Newington, Conn Drugs fall from buttocks at traffic stop WEST HARTFORD, Conn. (UPI) -- Police in Connecticut said a motorist pulled over for not wearing his seat belt was arrested after drugs concealed in his buttocks fell out of his clothes. West Hartford authorities said Dillon Livingston, 26, of Newington was pulled over while allegedly driving without his seat belt at about 9:15 p.m. Thursday and the bags of heroin and cocaine fell from his clothes while he was being questioned, The Hartford (Conn.) Courant reported Tuesday. Livingston, who was charged with failure to wear a seat belt and illegal possession, was released on $2,500 bail and is due in court July 14.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Brigit Re: Copyright Symbol Dear Webby, How do you make the copyright symbol that you put on some of your pictures ? I am trying to write a neat little copyright notice like that onto a bunch of pictures, but pasting it does not look good. Thanks Brigit Dear Brigit There are some programs like for example "CopyRightLeft" that will do that for entire batches of pictures, but I prefer to take care of each picture individually. If you have light/dark alternating areas in the default signature area, the batch programs make an illegible mess. By doing it manually you can select a better spot. If you use for example the Arial font for the notice, then the copyright symbol is ALT 0169 and it's just another normal character that changes exactly the same way as the other characters when you change font size, style or color. Have FUN! DearWebby
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A 75-year-old woman went to the doctor for a check up. The doctor told her she needed more cardiovascular activity and recommended that she engage in sexual activity at least three times a week. A bit embarrassed, she said to the doctor, "Please tell my husband." The doctor went out into the waiting room and told the husband that his wife needed sex three times a week. The 78-year-old husband replied, "Which days?" The doctor answered, "Monday, Wednesday, and Friday would be ideal." The husband said, "I can bring her on Monday, but on Wednesdays and Fridays I golf, so she'll have to take the bus."
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Make Envelopes From Magazines I have done this for years. Our library has magazines in their bookstore for a quarter each. After I read them, I make envelopes from the most colorful pages and tear out all the cologne ads (woman's magazines) that have the scent under the flap. When I am ready to mail a handmade card or letter I lift the tab on the scent and rub it on the inside of my magazine made envelope. Makes it a pleasant surprise for the recipient. There are several envelope templates for downloading on the web available for free. The larger the magazine pages, the more choices you have for your envelope size. I have also used maps and old sheet music. You will need to add a label for the address. I use my return address sticker to seal the envelope in the back. Food, art, garden, travel, and animal magazines have some great photos. Source: My idea as far as using the scents. Envelopes from magazines have been around for some time. By NoRulesArt from FL http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
On a curvy mountain highway late one night, Bob was complaining about the car behind us. "That guy must be drunk!" he said. "Every time I move over to let him pass, he slows down. When I get back on the road, he gets closer and stays on my tail." Thirty minutes later, the car turned on a set of flashing blue lights. Coming up to his window, the officer said, "Sir, I'd like you to take an alcohol test. You've been swerving on and off the road for half an hour." ------------------- That happened to me too once. However, I knew the road and decided to outrun the "drunk". His buddies were waiting for me in the next town in the morning, when I stopped for coffee.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighborhood. They parked their truck the end of the alley and worked their way to the other end. At the last house, a woman looking out her kitchen window watched the two men as they checked her gas meter. Finishing the meter check, the senior supervisor challenged his younger co-worker to a foot race down the alley back to the truck to prove that an older guy could outrun a younger one. As they came running up to the truck, they realized the lady from that last house was huffing and puffing right behind them. They stopped and asked her what was wrong. Gasping for breath, she replied, "When I saw two men from the gas company running as hard as you two were, I figured I'd better run too!"

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TweakUI versus hacking the registry 



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Good Morning,  !
Today is Wednesday, July 6

As usual during the cold ripple, after a long and cold winter
and spring, summer makes up for it. Sure is nice out now!

Have FUN!
DearWebby


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Some people like my advice so much that they frame it upon the wall instead of using it. --- Gordon R. Dickson Statistics: The only science that enables different experts using the same figures to draw different conclusions. --- Evan Esar
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club, showering, getting changed for the 19th hole. (The bar) When a cell phone on a bench rings, a man picks it up, engages the hands-free speaker function, and begins a conversation. Man: "Hello?" Woman: "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?" Man: "Yes." Woman: "Great! I am at the mall two blocks from where you are. I just saw a beautiful leather coat. It's absolutely gorgeous!! Can I buy it?" Man: "What's the price?" Woman: "Only a bit over $1,000." Man: "Well, OK, go ahead and get it, if you like it that much." Woman: "Ahhh, you know that Nordic Track exerciser I told you about, to get you in shape? It's on sale for only $1995. I think we should get it while it is on sale. Man: "Just 1995 ?" Woman: "Yes, just 1995 instead of 2600." Man: "OK, but for that price I'd want it delivered and set up." Woman: "Great! But before we hang up, something else........" Man: "What?" Woman: "Mom called and wanted to know if she could stay a couple of weeks. She wants to attend some art course here in town. Would you mind terribly, Sweetie?" Man: "Aren't those courses a month? But I don't mind this time. I'll be busy anyway and there shouldn't be a problem." Woman: "OK, sweetie...Thanks! I'll see you later!! I love you!!!" Man: "Bye...I love you too..." The man hangs up and closes the phone's flap. The other men are looking at him in astonishment and derision. The man holds up the phone and asks, "Anyone know who this phone belongs to?"
The personnel office received an email requesting a listing of the department staff broken down by age and sex. The personnel office sent this reply... "Attached is a list of our staff. We currently have no one who is broken down by age or sex. However, we have a few alcoholics in the shipping department."
Click through the picture to the large version. Click through the picture to the large version.
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Melissa Pemberton, 24 in Orlando, Florida Woman steals TV by having Craigslist buyer come to victim's house, pull it off wall SANFORD — Melissa Pemberton stole her mother's 42-inch TV two days before Christmas, according to court records. Here's how she did it: First, she sold it for $100 on Craigslist, a classified ad website, then she had the buyer show up at her mother's house in Maitland, pull it off the wall and haul it away, according to her arrest report. He had no idea he had just helped steal the TV, the report said. Pemberton pleaded no contest to grand theft and burglary six weeks ago in this and four other cases. In three of them, she stole things — a guitar and amp, laptop computer, cell phones — from her mother and stepfather, according to court records. She's now asking Circuit Judge Marlene Alva to let her take back the plea. That's due in part to the sentence she wound up with, one she had not negotiated: Alva ordered her to prison for eight years. After she was sentenced, Pemberton, 24, wrote the judge a letter, apologizing, admitting the crimes but blaming them on a pain pill addiction. She has no prior arrests, she wrote, and an eight-year sentence "is very extreme" ub=n her opinion. The day after the plea, her attorney, Assistant Public Defender Wayne Culver, filed paperwork, asking the judge to allow Pemberton to withdraw it. Culver wrote that the plea was involuntary because he had failed to give her good advice. The judge appointed Winter Park attorney Dana Harris to take over the case.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Charles Re: Icon arrows Dear Webby, There is a way to get rid of the icon arrows by editing the registry. Wouldn't that be a lot quicker, than downloading a program? Charles Dear Charles Yes, YOU can edit the registry. Most people prefer to use TweakUI instead. Keep in mind, TweakUI is a whole collection of fixes and tweaks. For example the "Clear Fonts" font tuner is in there too, for getting rid of the tiny jaggies on fonts, and quite a few more handy utilities. Unless you frequently hack around the registry, TweakUI is a better deal, and it is free anyway. Have FUN! DearWebby
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A woman devised her own system for labeling homemade meals she stored in the freezer. Instead of calling them Chicken Parmigiana or Meatloaf, she labeled them Whatever, Anything, I Don't Know and, her favorite, Food. That way when she asked her husband what he wanted for dinner, she was certain to have it on hand.
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Book Exchange Party One year, my daughter hosted a book exchange for some of her friends and neighbors. Kids brought their used books and took turns selecting new old books. We baked a cake shaped like a book and that was it. The kids played outside afterward. No expense but for the cake and everyone had some books to enjoy afterward. By Jackie from Medinah, IL http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
You have all seen those little hand-painted signs hung in so many kitchens. Many are heartwarming and homey, but many are simply hilarious. Here is a collection of the funnier ones: *A messy kitchen is a happy kitchen and this kitchen is delirious. *No husband has ever been shot while doing the dishes. *A husband is someone who takes out the trash and gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house. *A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand. *Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator. *Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never cease to be amused. *A clean house is a sign of a misspent life. *Help keep the kitchen clean - take me out for supper. *Housework done properly, can kill you. *Countless number of people have eaten in this kitchen and gone on to lead fairly normal lives.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
One day a four-year-old son and his mother were watching TV. As they sat on the couch, she stated rubbing his head and noticed his hair was getting long. She told him he needed another haircut, then asked him, "Why does your hair grow so fast?" He replied, "Because you water it too much!"

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Get rid of shortcut arrow on icons 



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Good Morning,  !
Today is Tuesday, July 5

Some people try quite desperately to amuse me by doubting
everything, that has not been read from a teleprompter.

Solar electricity is one example. 
So what if Obama has not mentioned it. He has not mentioned 
gravity either. That kind of stuff is way too technical for whoever
writes his speeches. Don't worry about it!

Look at what industry and commerce is doing, after listeneing
to their engineers. They put up solar collectors.

Even schools are putting them up on the roof and even into
back yards. I read about one school, that went a step further.
They use solar panels to provide a shaded area, and since the
shade allows grass to grow in their hot climate, they use the 
vice princial's sheep to trim the grass, instead of spending 
money to trim it.

Sure, if your roof is only 1000 square feet, you are not
going to make a big pile of money with solar, but you WILL
be able to reduce your electrical bills, and in some months
you will even get paid a little bit. In some states, like 
for example Arizona, check for grants that will help you 
with solar installations.

Have FUN!
DearWebby


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A gossip is someone who talks to you about others, a bore is someone who talks to you about himself, and a brilliant conversationalist is one who talks to you about yourself. --- Lisa Kirk I'm a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it. --- Thomas Jefferson
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

A college dean was berating a veteran economics professor for having used the same tests for the past 35 years. "Don't you realize, professor, that the students have been sharing these tests for decades and that all of your students know EXACTLY what's on the test before they sit for it?" "Doesn't matter," replied the professor. "You must realize that the subject is economics. Economics is the science of explaining tomorrow, why the predictions, which were made yesterday, did not come true today. So the answers are different each year!"
An octogenarian who was an avid golfer moved to a new town and joined the local Country Club. He went to the Club for the first time to play but was told that there wasn't anybody he could play with because they were already out on the course. - He repeated several times that he really wanted to play today. Finally, the assistant Pro said he would play with him and asked him how many strokes he wanted for a bet. The 80 year old said, "I really don't need any strokes as I have been playing quite well. The only problem I have, is getting out of sand traps." He did play well. Coming to the par four 18th they were all even. The Pro had a nice drive and was able to get on the green and two-putt for a par. The old man had a nice drive, but his approach shot landed in a sand trap next to the green. Playing from the bunker he hit a high ball, which landed on the green and rolled into the cup. Birdie, match and all the money! The Pro walked over to the sand trap where his opponent was standing. He said: "nice shot, I thought you said you have a problem getting out of sand traps? " Replied the octogenarian "I do, would you please give me a hand."
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Navahcia Edwards, 23, in Chicago, Ill Bank robbers dressed as nuns PALOS HEIGHTS, Ill. (UPI) -- Authorities in Illinois said a former bank employee and an accomplice robbed the facility of $120,000 while dressed in nun costumes. The federal criminal complaint states Navahcia Edwards of Chicago and a male accomplice who has not been arrested robbed the TCF Bank in Palos Heights of $120,000 May 29 while displaying weapons and wearing nun costumes, the Chicago Tribune reported Friday. FBI officials said Edwards used her Visa card to buy a pair of "Nun on the Run adult masks" 10 days prior to the robbery. Edwards still managed to leave a rich trail of evidence, including receipts of the purchases of the nun's costumes and the rental of the alleged getaway car. Edwards also used the card to buy white zip ties from a south suburban hardware store. The zip ties appear to match those used to tie the hands of two tellers in the TCF Bank robbery, federal authorities said. Edwards was charged in June with embezzling nearly $20,000 while working at a Chase Bank branch in Country Club Hills. Edwards and her accomplice stormed the bank with handguns, jumped over counters and forced tellers to open the vault, authorities charged. While her accomplice held a gun against a teller's head, Edwards avoided anti-theft devices and a vault that kept only coins in order to retrieve the $120,000, tipping authorities off that the robber likely had inside knowledge.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: NosyRosy Re: Get rid of Icon checkmarks Dear Webby, First off, in addition to well wishes for your continued recovery and in anticipation of your assistance, thank you a million times over. Was searching your old columns for one, single answer: How to get rid of those annoying check marks from programs I've copied? ......... huh ? ......... They're on the bottom left of almost all of the icons on my desktop. Wondered how to get rid of them. Now that I right-clicked, can see they're simply called desktop icons. By right-clicking it's also possible either to show them or not. This wouldn't enable me to remove the check marks, only masquerade them. So hard to explain a simple process, no? So guess it's my choice whether I allow them to appear, or not, but not still would be unable to remove them. Hope you're doing well and continue improving health wise. As I've read your column over the years, I admire your courageous lifestyle. Hope your Dad is also doing well. It's apparent you and your Dad have a very close and loving relationship. Thanks. Hope I've explained it well enough, though. Thanks for your patience. H Dear H Those are not checkmarks. Those are arrows to indicate, that those icons are shortcuts to stuff, that is not really cluttering up the desktop folder, but is tucked away properly into their own folders somewhere. The easiest to fix that is by using TweakUI. Instructions are here: http://windowsxp.mvps.org/arrow.htm TweakUI (Tweak the User Interface) was originally a collection of utilities created by various programmers to help fix the shortcomings of Windows 95. Microsoft does not support TweakUI, but they stopped bitching about it and even provide a download location for it now. After all, those fixes and tweaks make THEM look good. There are TweakUIs for all versions of Windows from 95 on all the way up to Windows 7. Have FUN! DearWebby
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A girl says to a salesman, "I'm not sure if I should buy a sweatshirt or a windbreaker." He says, "Well, that depends. Are you gonna sweat, or are you gonna break wind?"
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Organizing Coupons We only eat out as a family if we have a coupon to do so. But keeping track of all those dining out coupons can be difficult. I created a coupon file just for this purpose. Using a small check organizer file, I labeled sections with titles such as: fast food, ice cream, pizza, buffet, diners, etc. There is even a section for entertainment (bowling, mini golf, movies). We keep this file in our car along with my grocery coupon file so we remember to use them before their expiration dates. By Deb from Manchester, PA http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
Bob : "Now my grandfather, he knew the exact day of the year that he was going to die. It was the right year too. Not only that, but he knew what time he would die that day, and he was right about that too." Bill : "Wow, that's Incredible. How did he know all of that?" Bob : "The judge told him."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
When I was working in the Piggly Wiggly many years ago, I noticed the sexy little blonde who dashed into the store to pick up a few items. She marched right to my "Express Lane". I was on the phone doing a price check. In a huff, blondie said, "Excuse me, I'm in a hurry. Could you check me out?" I looked her up and down, and told her, "Hmmm. You look pretty good to me!" She seemed to be rather torn between throwing stuff at me, or smiling over the compliment.

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1600x1200 monitors 



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Good Morning,  !
Today is Monday, July 4

Happy Independence Day!


Before mowing the lawn it looked like some storms in the West 
would get here in about an hour or more. No problem, I can mow
the back part in the meantime. 

Half an hour later a lawn chair flew by, doing about 50, and 
my cap raced after it. Then a gust of wind nearly knocked me over.
Well, I finished that lap, put the lawn mower away and went 
scouting for my cap. Took me a bit, but I got it back.

In New Orleans, if the wind is over 39 miles per hour, 
they call it a hurricane. This was just a rambunctious 
Chinook, and between gusts it sometimes slowed down to
about 45. 

The heavy hurricane chimes, that Sandie had sent me years 
ago from Florida, are nicely sheltered on the roofed deck,
but gonging away like crazy. So I got myself a coffee, 
unchained one of my deck chairs and watched the performance.
I love Chinooks, the hot, dry and gusty winds, but this one
seemed to have something extra with it. 

It was not dry! After I got good and comfortable, it shifted to
NorthWest and horizontal rain started, flying by me a foot away,
with just a bit of spray bouncing at me. 

After my second cup of coffee it settled down. By that time
it had reached Calgary, 60 miles away and knocked out the
power for 5000 homes.

Well, time to get back to work here.

Have FUN!
DearWebby


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please donate what you can!

The saying "Getting there is half the fun" became obsolete with the advent of commercial airlines. --- Henry J. Tillman An intellectual is a man who takes more words than necessary to tell more than he knows. --- Dwight D. Eisenhower
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

Best Oxymoron's State worker Legally drunk Exact estimate Act naturally Found missing Resident alien Genuine imitation Airline Food Good grief Government organization Sanitary landfill Alone together Small crowd Business ethics Soft rock Butt Head Military Intelligence Sweet sorrow Happily married "Now, then..." Passive aggression Clearly misunderstood Peace force Extinct Life Plastic glasses Terribly pleased Computer security Political science Tight slacks Definite maybe Pretty ugly Rap music Working vacation Microsoft Works
An enthusiastic door-to-door vacuum salesman goes to the first house in his new territory. He knocks, a real mean and tough looking lady opens the door, and before she has a chance to say anything, he runs inside and dumps cow patties all over the carpet. He says, "Lady, if this vacuum cleaner don't do wonders cleaning this up, I'll eat every chunk of it." She turns to him with a smirk and says, "You want ketchup on that?" The salesman says, "Why do you ask?" She says, "We just moved in and we haven't got the electricity turned on yet."
Click through the picture to the large version. 1910 Cadillac With Mother-in-Law Seat
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD and a Darwin Award goes to Philip A. Contos, 55 of Parish, New York Helmet protester crashed and died ONONDAGA, N.Y. — Police say a motorcyclist participating in a protest ride against helmet laws in upstate New York died after he flipped over the bike's handlebars and hit his head on the pavement. The accident happened Saturday afternoon in the town of Onondaga, in central New York near Syracuse. State troopers tell The Post-Standard of Syracuse that 55-year-old Philip A. Contos of Parish, New York, was riding a 1983 Harley Davidson with a group of bikers who were protesting helmet laws by not wearing helmets. Troopers say Contos hit his brakes and the motorcycle fishtailed. The bike spun out of control, and Contos toppled over the handlebars. He was pronounced dead at a hospital. Speed was not an issue and troopers say Contos would have survived, if he had been wearing a helmet. ------------ I used to ride bikes, often at or beyond their or my limit, and had a few high speed spills, but I was always wearing a helmet. I still have a stainless steel thermos, that I dented in a 120 mph spill on the way to work in 1980.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Amanda Re: Decent monitors Dear Webby, Some salesman told my boss that you can't get regular 4:3 monitors any more, that they are all sawed off now. Remembering what you had said, I told him he was full of used hay, and that the liar probably told him, that all computers now have Windows 7 on them. Well, he wants to see some actual numbers and links. You got to back me up now! Amanda Dear Amanda No problem at all. Just go to http://webby.com/monitors. I don't sell them, but I always put a link to currently good monitor deals there. You can get 1600 x 1200 LCD monitors there from $110 and up. With most video cards you can rotate the display, so that the top is on the left side, and then turn the monitor 90 degrees, so that you have a proper 3:4 word processor monitor and see a page, just like it is going to get printed. There is absolutely no need to put up with a sawed off monitor. Have FUN! DearWebby
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After putting her children to bed, a mother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to put a green mud pack on her face and wash her hair. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. At last she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard her three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was that monfter?"
Daily tip from
Thriftyfun.com Cookout Tip: Cut Burgers in Half When serving food at cookouts, go ahead and put some of the hamburgers on buns, then cut them in half before placing on the serving platter. This helps cut down on the number of kids who take a whole burger, and then waste half of it. By Becki in Indiana http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
A new real estate salesman had just closed his first deal, only to discover that the piece of land he had sold was completely under water. "That customer's going to come back here pretty mad," he said to his boss. "Should I give him his money back?" "Money back?" roared the boss. "What kind of salesman are you? Get your lazy butt out there and sell him a houseboat!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
There was a woman who spent some months serving God in Kenya. On her final visit to a remote township she attended a medical clinic. As the Maasai women there began to sing together, she found herself deeply moved by their hauntingly beautiful harmonies. She wanted to always remember this moment and try to share it with friends when she arrived home. With tears flowing down her cheeks, she turned to her friend and asked, "Can you please tell me the translation of the words to this song?" Her friend looked at her an solemnly replied, "If you boil the water, you won't get dysentery."

» Happy Birthday, USA






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Waterproof keyboard 



Zoom the font size for best readability   

Good Morning,  !
Today is Sunday, July 3

Time to mow again. I get to skip parts, because the clower has bloomed
and I want to get the clover seed to toss into areas, where the 
dandylions were. Clover seems to be tough enough to take over.

Have FUN!
DearWebby



If you can help with the server cost
please donate what you can!

"It is costly wisdom that is brought by experience." --- Roger Ascham (1515-1568) To avoid situations in which you might make mistakes may be the biggest mistake of all. --- Peter McWilliams
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

The wife appeared at the breakfast table in curlers and a worn bathrobe. The husband looked up from his newspaper and said, "Why can't you dress for breakfast like you did before we got married?" "I'm married now!" she snapped back. "And I'm not pregnant any more!"
After 50 years of wondering why he didn't look like his younger sister or brother, the man finally got up the nerve to ask his mother if he was adopted. "Yes, Jake, you were," his mother said as she started to cry softly. "But it didn't work out and they brought you back."
Click through the picture to the large version.
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Jazzmyne Dunlap, 21, Fort Worth, Texas DNA, Facebook pic lead to robbery suspect FORT WORTH, Texas (UPI) -- Texas police said a robber was arrested thanks to DNA from clothes abandoned after a crime and a Facebook photo of her in clothes from another robbery. Fort Worth police working with the FBI said Jazzmyne Dunlap, 21, handed a threatening note to a teller at the Wells Fargo bank on Brown Boulevard in Arlington in October and abandoned her clothes in the bushes at a nearby daycare after fleeing the bank with an unspecified amount of cash, the Fort Worth Star-Telegram reported Tuesday. Investigators said Dunlap also is suspected in bank robberies March 10 at the BBVA Compass Bank in Fort Worth and April 19 at a Wells Fargo bank in Haltom City. DNA testing from the abandoned clothing matched Dunlap, who had previous convictions for theft of property and auto burglary, and a search for her name on Facebook turned up a profile picture of the suspect allegedly wearing clothing from the April 19 robbery, police said. Dunlap was arrested May 31 and indicted June 15 on a count of bank robbery in the April 19 holdup.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Vicky Re: Waterproof keyboard Dear Webby, A friend mentioned that you once wrote about a waterproof keyboard. I need one for the greenhouse. It's no problem having the computer and monitor behind glass in the seed room, but the keyboard has to be out where I work. Is there something that would not die in a week? Vicky Dear Vicky Yes, sure. The GrandTec Virtually Indestructible keyboard can handle that for years, or until you wear the letters off the keys. A small one, without the numeric keypad, is $20, and they have a bunch of different versions all the way up to one with a built in "mouse" for $70. They are not bullet proof, but liquids don't bother them, and you can step on them and even drive over them. They are absolutely silent, no clackity-clack. One word of caution, though: Make absolutely sure, that the model and version you select, has the arrow keys in the format that you are used to. For example, if you are used to an inverted T format of the arrow keys, you woud get really frustrated if you accidentally select a different format. You can get those keyboards at TigerDirect and some of the bigger computer stores. Have FUN! DearWebby
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From Irene Dear Webby, you once had that "Mom taught me" series. Can youi please run it again? Thanks Irene Sure, Irene Here it is: MOM TAUGHT ME TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside, I just finished cleaning!" MOM TAUGHT ME RELIGION "You better pray that will come out of that carpet!" MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT TIME TRAVEL "If you don't straighten up, I'll knock you into next week!" MOM TAUGHT ME LOGIC "Because I said so, that's why!" MOM TAUGHT ME FORESIGHT "Make sure you wear clean underwear in case you're in an accident." MOM TAUGHT ME IRONY "Keep laughing and I'll give you something to cry about!" MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT THE SCIENCE OF OSMOSIS "Shut your mouth and eat your supper!" MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT CONTORTIONISM "Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck?" MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT STAMINA "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone!" MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT WEATHER "It looks like a tornado went through your room!" MOM TAUGHT ME HOW TO SOLVE PHYSICS PROBLEMS "If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you, would you listen then?" MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT HYPOCRISY "I've told you a million times, - don't exaggerate!" MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION "Stop acting like your father!" MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT ENVY "There are millions of less fortunate kids in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!" And most of all..... MOM TAUGHT ME THE CIRCLE OF LIFE "I brought you into this world, I can take you out!"
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Cut Sponges in Half I buy a lot of cleaning supplies at the Dollar Tree. Six sponges with the scrubby side for a dollar is a good price. But, I have found that they are sometimes too large to fit in some of the smaller places I have to clean. So, I get them home and cut them in half. They are easier to use and I double my money's worth! By Poor But Proud from Coos Bay, OR http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
One morning a local highway department crew reached their job site and realized they have forgotten all their shovels. The crew's foreman radios the office and tells his supervisor the situation. The supervisor radios back and says, "Don't worry, we'll send some shovels... tell them to just lean on each other until the shovels arrive."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Thanks to Cora for this one: What are the three fastest means of communication? 1) Internet 2) Telephone 3) Tellawoman!

» Hay






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What is my IP number? 



Zoom the font size for best readability   

Good Morning,  !
Today is Saturday, July 2

Congratulations to Ophelia for her transition to a paid
newsletter! Most people warned her, that she would lose 
most of her subscribers, but she proved them wrong!
Apparently 7% unsubscribed or blocked, 
but 6% upgraded to her $1 / month paid version, and
she hopes to gradually improve that even more.

Considering the economy that seems to be the way to go.
Most of the computer magazines are already paid 
subscriptions, even though they get Millions of bucks 
from Microsoft to speak kindly about W7. 

Once the economy picks up again about a year from now,
commissions from ads will start covering the costs again.
Yes, things will improve late spring next year, early summer, 
just like they started diving a quarter year before the 2008
election. A lot of just hope we can last that long.

Have FUN!
DearWebby



If you can help with the server cost
please donate what you can!

Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it. --- Andre Gide
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

A funny story circulated recently about Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes. Doyle evidently told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, "Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?" Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before. "No, sir," the driver responded, "I have never seen you before." Then he explained, "This morning's paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle." "This is truly amazing!" the writer exclaimed. "You are a real-life counterpart to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!" "There is one more thing," the driver said. "What is that?" asked Mr. Doyle. "Your name is on the front of your suitcase."
Thanks to Leroy for this one: At my church one day, a woman who had often snubbed me, went out of her way to give me a big hug before the service. I was surprised by her gesture and wondered what had initiated her change of heart. I got my answer at the end of the service. "Your assignment for next week," the minister instructed, "is the same as last week. I want you to go out there and hug somebody you just can't stand."
Click through the picture to the large version.
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Jerry Brown Jr., 27 and Tatiana Vargas, 21, in Newcastle, PA Woman, 89, dents robber's car with cane, helps nab PA. duo NEW CASTLE, Pa. (AP) - Pennsylvania police say a 89 year old woman used her cane to dent the car of two people who stole her friend's purse, and authorities were able to track down the getaway car based in part on the cane's imprint. New Castle police Chief Thomas Sansone says the woman and her 82-year-old friend were accosted outside a pizza shop Sunday. Police say 27-year-old Jerry Brown Jr. grabbed the purse but couldn't peel away before the 89-year-old banged the robber and his car's trunk with her cane. Police found the car, and, based on the description of the robber - and dents matching the cane - arrested Brown and 21-year-old Tatiana Vargas. Vargas admitted not only to being in the car during the incident, police said, but also to having known that Brown intended to commit a robbery. Brown and Vargas are also suspects in a similar incident in Union Township. The two are jailed in Lawrence County on robbery charges and on warrants for other crimes.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Kelly Re: What is my IP number? Dear Webby, to get around the restrictions of my ISP against using my own domain name based email address, I need to know the IP number of my Internet connection. What is the easiest way to get that? Kelly Dear Kelly just browse to http://webby.com/ip That page shows you your IP number and not much else. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Six year old Angie and her four year old brother Joel were sitting together in church. Joel giggled, sang, and talked out loud. Finally, his big sister had had enough. "You're not supposed to talk out loud in church," she hissed at Joel. "Why? Who's going to stop me?" Joel shot back. Angie pointed to the back of the church and said, "See those two big men in FBI suits standing by the door?" Joel nodded. "They're hushers."
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Make Your Own Fabric Softener Squares Take a package of soft cloths (e.g., generic brand of J-Cloth) and cut them in half. Soak them in fabric softener, wring out well, and hang dry. When ready to put a load of clothes in the dryer, slip a dried softener sheet in. These can be used a few times over and then you can start the soaking process over again. The sheets last forever and you'll never need to buy fabric softener sheets again. By sooz from Toronto, ON http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
Thanks to Tina for this story: My husband and I had just finished tucking our five young ones into bed one evening when we heard sobbing coming from three- year-old Billy's room. Rushing to his side, we found him crying hysterically. He had accidentally swallowed a penny and was sure he was going to die. No amount of talking could change his mind. Desperate to calm him, my husband palmed a penny that he happened to have in his pocket and pretended to pull it from Billy's ear. Billy was delighted. In a flash, he snatched it from my husband's hand, swallowed it and demanded cheerfully, "Do it again, Daddy!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice. After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you're out of the office?" "I give it to them," replied the lawyer, "and then I send them a bill." The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try. The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepared the bills. When he went to place them in his mailbox, he found a bill from the lawyer.

» Birds of Prey






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Holy Cow! 8 HOT Tools For How Much?? 

Those Wacky Gals have gone WAY overboard in their wackiness this time...

They're selling 8 HOT webmaster tools and scripts in a dimesale!

http://wackyweekendsale.com/WebTools2/?e=2bneil

I don't know about you, but I'm all for anything that makes my workload easier AND makes me more money at the same time.

And these tools really fit that bill:

* Auto Countdown Script to run your dimesales, firesales and product launches

* Auto Launcher to create buyer urgency

* Auto RSS to automatically populate your site with videos, articles and blog content

* Auto Squeeze to get new subscribers NOW by presenting them with a self-destructing offer

* Easy Cloaker to protect your affiliate commissions

* Easy SplitTest to test two or more versions of your sales pages

* Email Router to cut down the number of subscriber spam complaints

* MassURL to shrink your links without getting blacklisted

http://wackyweekendsale.com/WebTools2/?e=2bneil

Oh, I mentioned this is running as a dimesale, but did I tell you the starting price?

Only $2.95!

Get on over there now and grab your tools while you can get them for less than a fast food lunch!

http://wackyweekendsale.com/WebTools2/?e=2bneil


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Which font is best? 



Zoom the font size for best readability   
Good Morning,  !
It's Friday, July 1
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!

Happy Canada Day!

On Canada Day every town and village gets big funds from 
the federal Governemnt to put on fireworks and other 
festivities. When Canada Day falls on a Friday or Monday,
most people leave town, but those, who stay, focus on
the fireworks. I have a pretty good view from my back porch,
but might go up onto the roof this year.

Have FUN!
DearWebby



If you can help with the server cost
please donate what you can!

We haven't crossed that subtle line between childhood and adulthood until we stop saying 'It got lost' and say 'I lost it.' ---Sydney Harris The most overlooked advantage to owning a computer is that if you foul up, there's no law against whacking it around a little. --- Joe Martin In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice; In practice, there is. --- Chuck Reid
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

A man learned shortly before quitting time that he had to attend a meeting. He tried unsuccessfully to locate his car-pool members to let them know that he would not be leaving with them. Hastily he scribbled a message to one fellow and left it on his desk: "I have a last-minute meeting. Leave without me. Dave." At 7:00 p.m., the man stopped at his desk and found this note: "Meet us at the bar and grill across the street. Friday is YOUR day to drive, you Bozo!"
There was a man driving down the road behind an 18 wheeler, at every stoplight the trucker would get out of the cab, run back and bang on the trailer door. After seeing this at several intersections in a row the motorist followed him until he pulled into a parking lot. When they both had come to a stop the truck driver once again jumped out and started banging on the trailer door. The motorist went up to him and said, "I don't mean to be nosey but why do you keep banging on that door?" To which the trucker replied, "Sorry, can't talk now, I have 20 tons of canarries and a 10 ton limit, so i have to keep half of them flying at all times."
Click through the picture to the large version.
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Theodore Bickel, 25, of Okolona, Kentucky Suspect stole cruiser during arrest HERITAGE CREEK, Ky. (UPI) -- The lawyer for a Kentucky drunk driving suspect accused of stealing a police cruiser during his arrest blamed his client's actions on the influence of alcohol. [Right, he never does any drunk driving while sober!] Heritage Creek police said Theodore Bickel of Louisville was handcuffed and placed in the back of a police cruiser June 19 when he managed to remove his seat belt, move his handcuffed hands to his front, make his way to the front seat of the car and speed off in the vehicle, The Louisville Courier-Journal reported Thursday. Bickel, 25, crashed the car a few miles away and it flipped over a guardrail onto the roof. Bickel fled the scene and was arrested the following day, police said. Keith McKinney, Bickel's attorney, said his client was "very sorry that this happened and apologizes for his conduct." He said Bickel even apologized to the officer while stealing the vehicle. "I think he said, 'Sorry, dude,' when he took off," McKinney said. "Alcohol changes a lot of people. He wouldn't do anything like this if he was sober, I'll tell you that." Bickel is facing charges of wanton endangerment, driving under the influence, criminal mischief, escape, fleeing or evading police and theft by unlawful taking.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Bianca Re: Which font is best? Dear Webby, We got this big argument going at work about which font is the best. What is your opinion? Bianca Dear Bianca Best for what ? For a casual announcement Dauphin is good. It is relaxed but very readable. For something romantic you can sacrifice readability to slow down the reader and make him or her spend more time on each word. Try Vivace BT, For business, use Trebuchet if you want to appear as a modern innovator, Zurich Ex BT if you want to appear as a trusted banker, Tunga or Tahoma for reliable business Arial for clarity and precision Lucida Console is for a techy look and also for maximum readability on poor monitors or bad printers or faxes. For web sites I recommend Arial. It is the most readable and sharpest font that is available on the most machines. Tunga might be nicer, but you can't count on everybody having it on their computer. If they don't have the font, that you are using, your pretty document may look quite odd. When in doubt, stick with Arial, like I am using here. Have FUN! DearWebby
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A new miracle doctor was in town. He could cure anything and anybody, and everyone was amazed with what he can do. Everyone except for Mr. Smith, the town grouch. So Mr. Smith went to this 'miracle doctor' to prove that he wasn't anybody special. So he goes and tells the doctor, "Hey, doc, I have lost my sense of taste. I can't taste nothin', so what are ya goin to do?" The doctor scratches his head and mumbles to himself a little, then tells Mr. Smith, "What you need is jar number 43." Jar number 43? Mr. Smith wonders. So the doctor brings the jar and tells Mr. Smith to taste it. He tastes it and immediately spits it out, "This is gross!" he yells. "I just restored your sense of taste Mr. Smith," says the doctor. So Mr. Smith goes home very mad. One month later, Mr. Smith goes back to the doctor along with a new problem, "Doc," he starts, "I can't remember!" Thinking he got the doctor, the doctor scratches his head and mumbles to himself a little and tells Mr. Smith, "What you need is jar number 43..." Before the doctor finished his sentence, Mr. Smith fled the office.
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Large Juice Can as Charcoal Chimney Yesterday, I wanted to barbecue for the first time this year. I realized that I had no lighter fluid and really needed to start the coals up quickly. I thought of those charcoal starter chimneys and remembered I had a can of juice in my pantry. I emptied it into a pitcher and cut out the top and bottom. I put it on top of the bottom grate of my grill, put some newspaper in it, then some coals, and lit it. In no time, I had white hot charcoal. Easy! By KatherineC from Reno, NV http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
A nice old lady went to an auction sale. There she was attracted to a parrot in a gilded cage. The parrot was large, very healthy looking and exquisitely colored. The old lady was so attracted by the parrot's appearance that she couldn't help but bid on it. She bid, determined to have the parrot, but another bidder competed and drove the price very high. The old lady eventually bought the parrot. She was at the cashier's desk and told the cashier that she was so excited about the beautiful appearance of the parrot that she had neglected to ask if it could talk. The parrot spoke up, "Who do you think was bidding against you?"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Imagine living with 3 wives in one compound and never leaving the house for 5 years. It is now believed that Bin Laden called the US Navy Seals himself.

» Happy 144th!






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Advice From My Stockbroker 

I called my stockbroker and asked what I should be buying.
He replied, "If the current administration is in office much longer,
canned goods and ammunition are your best bets."


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Kids In College 

Two men sank into adjacent train seats after a long day in the city.
One asked the other, "Your son go back to college yet?"

"Two days ago."

"Mine's a senior this year, so it's almost over. In May, he'll be an engineer. What's your boy going to be when he gets out of college?"

"At the rate he's going, I'd say he'll be about thirty."

"No, I mean what's he taking in college?"

"He's taking every penny I make."

"Doesn't he burn the midnight oil enough?"

"He doesn't get in early enough to burn the midnight oil."

"Well, has sending him to college done anything at all?"

"Sure has! It's totally cured his mother of bragging about him."



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What is the Scroll Lock key for? 



Zoom the font size for best readability   
Good Morning,  !
It's Thursday, June 30

Charles, a subscriber and also my optometrist sent me this 
link for those who want to end smoking:
http://link.dvvc.ca/groups/evtpublic/wiki/441d9/Quit_Smoking.html

Because people remember, that I spent 30 years in the arctic, 
at this time of the year I usually get a bunch of requests 
to explain how the Midnight Sun works. Yes, again this year too.

The farther north or south you are, the the more the apparent
daily path of the sun changes from winter to summer. In winter
the sun rises just a bit South of straight West and sets just 
a bit North of straight West.

Then towards summer the sun rise and sunset locations spread
apart further and further. You notice that even where you are.
In the arctic and antarctic that spread is much greater and in June
sunset and sunrise are at the same spot, unless a mountain is
in the way.

Even if a mountain is briefly in the way, it doesn't get any darker
than if a storm cloud was hiding the sun.

I don't miss the arctic winters, but sumer sure makes me nostalgic.
June and July are always great for long river trips, for example
from Teslin to Dawson City. That trip takes two weeks just 
floating down the rivers with a canoe, two and a half to three weeks 
paddling steadily with a kayak. 

It used to be quite funny, taking our time in the morning and 
have a nice big breakfast and watch the Kayakers labor on by.
By about noon we catch up to them and drift past them. 
On my canoe I had gotten rid of the silly high benches and
made some low bucket seats upholstered with white fake leather.
Because the current is faster on top than lower down, a high riding
long 17 foot canoe takes advantage of that and gains a fair
bit of speed over the much lower riding kayaks, even though
those people seem to have to paddle just to stay upright.

I gained additional speed by using a drift-anchor made from
a lid of a large cooler. It floated with maybe one inch submerged
and took advantage of the fastest top "skin" of the river, and
towed the canoe fast enough, that the fin of the partly lowered
outboard acted like a rudder. It didn't steer as crisply as if the
motor had been running, but well enough to select the faster
or more scenic sides of the rivers.

On most trips I never turned the outboard engine on, but in
case we had forgotten something at a camp and had to go back
upriver for it, it would have been handy, or necessary.

Have FUN!
DearWebby



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"There is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it." --- Mary Wilson Little Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things in the world that just don't add up. --- James Magary
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

Eleanor, an attractive and refined young woman, tele- phoned the service station to make a tuneup appointment for her car. She was told they could squeeze her in at 4 PM. Imagine the attendant's surprise and my friend's embarras- sment when she walked in and announced, "Hello, I'm your four o'clock squeeze."
One frigid morning late summer morning in North Dakota a man turned up at work much the worse for wear. "I didn't sleep a wink." he told a co-worker. "I was up all night trying to keep my wife's begonia covered against the cold wind." "I should be so lucky." his co-worker replied. "When it's this cold my wife wears so many clothes to bed, I can never get anywhere near her begonia."
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Karrieam J. Jenkins, 36 in Old Lycoming, PA Spun out superman An out-of-control man claiming to be "super human" during what Old Lycoming Township police suspected was a drug overdose faces charges after officers discovered in plain view five bags of marijuana inside a vehicle he was using. Responding to the 3300 block of Lycoming Creek Road to investigate a report of a man causing a disturbance about 6 p.m. May 25, police found Karrieam J. Jenkins "sweating profusely, flailing his arms and spinning in circles as he yelled that he was 'super human,' " police said. Following a brief struggle, Jenkins, 36, of 681 Campbell St., was restrained so as not to harm himself, police said. "He apparently was suffering from the affects of an apparent overdose of an unknown drug," Sgt. Joseph Hope said of Jenkins in an affidavit. Jenkins was treated at the Williamsport Regional Medical Center and later released. Jenkins apparently had arrived at the scene using a car that was registered to his fiancee, Hope said. The car's driver door was opened and inside the door handle were five bags of the marijuana, the officer added. There also was a container of the controlled substance on top of the center console, Hope said. Investigators allege the bags belonged to Jenkins, who has been charged with possession of a controlled substance and drug paraphernalia. He has been sent a summons to appear before District Judge James H. Sortman.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Dean Re: What is th Scroll Lock for? Dear Webby, What is the Scroll Lock key for ? The IT tech here said it was an obsolete legacy key from the old days of DOS. Somehow I think it would have been dumped to save money if it was really obsolete. What is the real truth about it? Dean Dear Dean The Scroll Lock key is far from obsolete, however only people who work on spreadsheets, word processing documents, databases and graphics use it. If you are in a spreadsheet and want to scroll the sheet instead of the highlight of a cell, hit ScrollLock and use the arrow keys. The same trick works in word processors and databases and some graphics programs. Sure, you could do the same by taking a hand away from the keyboard and mousing around for a while. However, real professionals want to get work done as fast as possible and try to keep their hands on the keyboard. Have FUN! DearWebby
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My sister was bemoaning the fact that she had procrastinated cleaning and organizing her house for a long time. Since she was planning to entertain, she felt a lot of pressure to get moving. That afternoon she phoned, sounding glum. "I went to the bookstore," she explained, "and I bought a book on how to get organized. I was all fired up, and decided to clean out all the shelves in the living room. While I was working, I found three copies of that same darn book."
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Display Rock Collection In Garden I've been collecting rocks for quite a while, a lot of agates, but I also love bizarre rocks. I realized it was a waste to keep them in containers in the house, so I created this garden for all to enjoy. I especially like heart shaped rocks, and if you look carefully, they surround my Hibiscus. By Tammy http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
The wedding day was fast approaching. Everything was ready, and nothing could dampen Jennifer's excitement, not even her parents' nasty divorce. Her mother Sheila finally found the PERFECT dress to wear and would be the best dressed mother of the bride EVER! A week later, Jennifer was horrified to learn her new young stepmother, Barbie, had purchased the same dress. She asked Barbie to exchange the dress, but Barbie refused, "Absolutely not! I'm going to wear this dress; I'll look like a million in it!" Jennifer told her mother, who graciously replied, "Never mind dear. I'll get another dress, after all it's your special day, not hers." Two weeks later, another dress was finally found. When they stopped for lunch, Jennifer asked her mother, "What are you going to do with the first dress? Maybe you should return it. You don't have any place to wear it." Sheila grinned and replied, "Of course, I do, dear! I'm wearing it to the rehearsal dinner!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
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While sitting at your desk make clockwise circles with your right foot. While doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand. What direction is your foot going now?

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New Stamp 

Canada Post created and marketed a new stamp displaying a picture of the current Leader of the Opposition, Jack Layton. A recall of the stamps following concerns that they weren’t sticking. Canada Post recently suspended a recall of the stamps after the findings of a special Senate Committee were released.



The House of Commons was told that the stamp was not sticking to envelopes and the enraged Leader of the Opposition demanded a full investigation. After a month of testing and spending of $1.85 million, a special Senate Committee led by the leader of the Liberal, Bob Rae, presented the following findings:

1) The stamp is in perfect order.
2) There is nothing wrong with the adhesive.
3) People are spitting on the wrong side of the stamp.



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Drop Box 



Zoom the font size for best readability   
Good Morning,  !
It's Wednesday, June 29

Had a bit of a scare today. My car has a different key for the 
ignition, because the lock wore out a couple of years ago and the
mechanic could not be bothered to key the replacement lock to
the old key. So I have the ignition key on one key ring, 
and the trunk key on another one.

As I was putting my two July bags of groceries into the trunk, 
somehow the trunk key slipped out of my hand. By the time I
got into the car and realized, what must have happened, it was
too late.

My house key is also on that ring. So, when I got home, I had
to burgle into my house. I did find a spare trunk key and got
it open.
 
No key ring visible.
Instead of panicking, I decided to put the groceries away.
Finally, at the very bottom of the second bag, there was the 
key ring. 

After that, I sure was tempted to sit out in the shade and wind
and have a smoke to celebrate, but decided to sit out there
and NOT smoke, was a bigger celebration.

Have FUN!
DearWebby



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Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place. --- Billy Crystal You make the beds, you do the dishes, and six months later you have to start all over again. --- Joan Rivers The worst sin toward our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them: that's the essense of inhumanity. --- George Bernard Shaw
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

While strutting through a parking lot in his fancy executive elevator shoes, Mr Benson's right foot slipped left on an oily patch and after expertly tripping himself, he fell flat on his face. As he was lying there, a woman stopped her car and called out, "Are you hurt?" "No, I'm fine," he said, as he was trying to regain his composure and plan a way to exit without beeing seen by too many people. "Oh, good," she continued. "Will you be vacating your parking space any time soon?"
After spending all day Sunday watching football on television, Bob fell asleep and spent the night in the chair. His wife woke him in the morning. "It's twenty to seven," she called. "In who's favor?"
Thanks to Colleen for this picture: Click through the picture to the large version. Opuntia
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Natasha Larson, 34, Bradenton, Florida Wife Busted For Craigslist Harass Of Husband’s Ex JUNE 24--In a bid to harass her new husband’s former wife, a Florida woman placed a phony ad on Craigslist that purported to seek men willing to stop by the ex-spouse’s home since she needed “to be thrown around a little bit and to be dominated, that is exciting for me.” The ad, placed in February, resulted in a stream of unwanted suitors arriving at the home of Tracy Wilder, who also received phone calls and text messages from unknown men who said they were replying to “an ad on Craigslist in the casual encounters section ‘women4men,’” according to a Bradenton Police Department report. One man who called Wilder said that he had replied to the ad and had exchanged e-mails with someone using the address wilderthnuno@gmail.com. During that correspondence, the man said, he was provided with Wilder’s home address and phone number. He also gave Wilder a copy of the original Craigslist ad, entitled “Adventerous Couple,” which claimed that, “I also like to take charge sometimes but I need a strong man to keep me in check. My boyfriend Matt lives with me but he is open to my need to explore.” After Wilder contacted police, investigators subpoenaed records from Google for the wilderthnuno@gmail.com e-mail account. The documents revealed that the account was created on February 18, the day the fake Craigslist ad was posted. Google also provided the IP address from which the account was created, which resulted in the subsequent issuance of a subpoena to Verizon for subscriber information corresponding to that IP number. Verizon records showed that Wilder’s ex-husband, Donald Larson, had been assigned the IP in question at a Sarasota address. During the execution of a June 15 search warrant at the home, Natasha Larson, Donald’s wife, admitted posting the phony Craigslist ad in Wilder’s name. Additionally, Larson, 34, “admitted that she had spoken with several unknown persons’ through e-mail inviting them to meet her at the victim’s home address for a sexual encounter and giving out the victim’s personal cell phone number.” As a result, Larson--pictured in the above mug shot--was arrested yesterday and charged with criminal use of identification information, a felony. She was released from custody after posting $1500 bond. The police report does not indicate why Larson targeted her husband’s former wife, though investigators did note that when Wilder first contacted cops about the fake ad, she did say that she suspected Larson was responsible for the Craigslist posting.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Bill Re: DropBox and SugarSync Webby, Fanny could also use something like Dropbox or Sugarsync. These are free, secure, and much easier to use than a thumb drive, plus you don't go off and forget it! It's also better than having to upload to a web site. All you have to do is drop a file into Dropbox or Sugarsync and the rest is automatic. Files are then accessible on multiple computers if that's what you want. Might work for Fanny and others. I have found both to be very helpful. Bill Dear Bill Drop box and Sugarsync are rather limited, and unfortunately, they do tend to lose stuff. The dumbest thing one can do is shift-drag pictures from a camera onto drop-box. It will delete them from the camera quite reliably, but they don't always wind up in their drop box. Even my own father did that, but only once. With a web site, you drag them there, as if you were dragging them to a different folder, and you see them at the destination. Plus you can edit files. The server is just a computer in addition to the ones at work and at home. You are in control of your filing, and you can set up any file structure you want for permanent and semi-permanent stuff. It's a whole class more versatile than a drop box. Have FUN! DearWebby
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At the exclusive restaurant where I work, a party of diners was exhausting the waiter with relentless demands. Through it all, he remained professional. Finally, after leaving a very meagre tip, one of the patrons asked the waiter to take the group's picture and insisted on giving him all kinds of instructions, since this was a once in a lifetime family reunion. He smiled and took a lot of pictures. He used up the rest of the film in the old fashioned camera. Each picture showed the entire group quite nicely, from the neck down.
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Simple Ways to Conserve Water I decided I was tired of standing at the sink running the water down the drain, while I waited on it to change to hot water to use. My goodness what a surprise I had when I used a pitcher to catch the water! I was wasting almost a gallon every time I was waiting on the water to get hot. Now I keep a pitcher nearby, and I save the water to use during the day. By Marsha from Greenville, NC http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
Sam came home to Anni and said "Guess what? I've found a great job. A 10 a.m. start, 2 p.m. finish, no overtime, no weekends and it pays $600 a week!" "That's great," Anni said. "Yeah, I thought so too," Sam agreed. "You start Monday."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Teacher: "Have you ever hunted bear?" Little Johnny: "No, but I've gone fishing in my shorts."

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Carrying files from work to home 



Zoom the font size for best readability   
Good Morning,  !
It's Tuesday, June 28

I find it amazing, how the left wing media tells the difference
between civilians and military. When organized rebels throw
gasoline bombs and rocks or shoot at cops, that is their
democratic right to freedom of expression. After all, if they
are left wingers, they are poor, innocent civilians.

However, if cops and military shoot back, then that is 
genocide, murder, atrocity and all kinds of bad stuff.
It just depends on who is doing it. 

Mark Twain summed it up nicely:
  
"If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. 
If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed."
--- Mark Twain

Have FUN!
DearWebby



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Hold it the greatest sin to prefer existence to honor, and for the sake of life to lose the reasons for living. --- Juvenal (- 130 BC)
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

It was after 3 a.m. in the fancy restaurant, and all the guests but one had gone home. The last guest was sleeping at his table. The cleaning lady, irritated that she was delayed in doing her job, turned to the restaurant owner. "I've seen you shake the old fool and wake him up five times," she said. "Why don't you make him go home?" "No way !" answered the owner cheerfully. "Every time I wake him up, he asks for his bill and pays it!"
During a friendly argument, Billy-Bob asked Betty-Sue why she had married him in the first place. "I was just stupid," she teased. When he said he was happy to hear that, Betty-Sue requested an explanation. "People get divorced all the time because they fall out of love," he said. "But I've never heard of anybody falling out of stupid."
Thanks to Chuck E for this picture: Click through the picture to the large version. Weed Star
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Danielle Harley, 36, of Moon, PA Woman Calls Police On Neighbor, Gets Arrested MOON TOWNSHIP (KDKA) — A local woman was arrested after police found her children home alone and living in deplorable conditions. Danielle Harley, 36, lives at 1888 Montour Street Ext. in Moon Township. She called the police about a threatening phone call she got from her neighbor. She told 911 she was leaving because she was afraid. Police showed up. “The neighbor came out and told the officer that they’d seen her leave with someone else, but there were two young kids in the house – they believed there were two young kids still in the house,” Moon Township Police Captain Greg Seamon said. Two kids, ages 8 and 4, were found sleeping inside. Harley eventually returned to find out it wasn’t her neighbor who was in trouble. “She came back to the house while the officers were there and then the officers then arrested her for endangering the welfare of the children,” Seamon said.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Fanny Re: Carry files between home and work Dear Webby I'm a teacher and will be at a different school this fall. At this school I get to ride the school bus, as long as I carry a big wooden spoon and keep the riots on the bus under control. I'm sure it won't be that bad, but they definitely advised that I don't carry my laptop along. I used the laptop mostly to carry the data between the school computer and my home machine. What would you recommend for carrying my preparations and homework between home and school ? Fanny Dear Fanny The most civilized way would be to get yourself a little web site, upload the day's data to there before you leave home, and download it into the school machine when you get there. All you "carry" is your password. You never forget anything at home or at work. A private sub-domain site is $2.50 a month Second best is to get a compact flash card and a reader. The reader just plugs into a USB port and makes the flash card another drive. Flash cards come from 1/4 to 64 GigaBytes They are small enough that you can sew a little pocket for one onto the inside of a regular belt. If you have a belt with little pockets for parking meter change, that will do just fine. The readers are between $15 and $50, depending on options. The $15 kind that I use works just fine. You can leave those attached to the computers and only take the little flash card along. Best are the 2 GB SD cards made for cameras. They work on all machines and operating systems. Above 2 GB you may have occasional mix and match problems. Of course, if you lose or forget the chip, there is no data. So I highly recommend a $2.50 a month web site. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Tired of having to balance Cindy's checkbook, Mike made a deal with her; he would look at it, but only after she had spent some time trying to wrestle it into shape. The following night, after spending hours poring over stubs and figures, Cindy said proudly, "I've done it! I made it balance!" Impressed, Mike came over to take a look. "Let's see... mortgage 550.00, electricity 70.50, phone 35.00." His brow wrinkled as he read the last entry. "It says here ESP, $615. What the heck is that?" "Oh," she said, "That means, Error Some Place!"
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Mark the "Up" Side on Electrical Plugs Do you have cords to plug into an outlet and are always trying to plug it in upside down, because of one prong being wider than the other? In the correct position, put a dab of white out (liquid or tape) on a dark-colored plug or draw a black spot with a permanent marker on a light-colored or white plug. I always do a tiny heart. Sure has made my life easier - sometimes it's the little things! By Vicky from Central KY http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
Thanks to Mary for this one: Cover the lower half of the picture with your hand and look only at the upper half. Then cover the top half and look at the lower half. Then look at the entire picture.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Millie's kindergarten-aged daughter suddenly announced just before school that she needed to take a clean tee shirt to class. She told Moe that the teacher was going to iron an anti-drug message on it. Millie frantically swept through their daughter's room, finding nothing usable but one tee shirt that already had something printed on one side. She sent it off to school with their daughter. That afternoon, the daughter returned and happily showed off her shirt. On one side it said, "Families are Forever." And on the other, "Be Smart, Don't Start."

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