Keystroke Macro recorder 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Saturday, October 31
End of Summer Time in most of North America.
Let your clocks fall back an hour tonight.
You get an extra hour of sleep.

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award and a Darwin Award goes to a Tennessee fugitive killed in police shoot-out Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 29, in 1517 Martin Luther posted the 95 Theses on the door of the Wittenberg Palace Church. The event marked the start of the Protestant Reformation in Germany. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ I prefer the company of peasants because they have not been educated sufficiently to reason incorrectly. --- Michel de Montaigne (1533 - 1592) Good breeding consists of concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person. --- Mark Twain As you journey through life take a minute every now and then to give a thought for the other fellow. He could be plotting something. --- Hagar the Horrible ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Late one night in the capitol city a mugger wearing a ski mask jumped into the path of a well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs. "Give me your money," he demanded. Indignant, the affluent man replied, "You can't do this - I'm a US Congressman!" "In that case," replied the robber, "give me MY money!" ______________________________________________________ A preacher was completing a temperance sermon: with great expression he said, "If I had all the beer in the world, I'd take it and throw it into the river." With even greater emphasis he said, "And if I had all the wine in the world, I'd take it and throw it into the river." And then finally, he said, "And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I'd take it and throw it into the river." He sat down. The song leader then stood very cautiously and announced with a wide grin, "For our .hic... clo-shing shong, let ush shing Hymn # 365: "We Shall Gather at the River." ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!
______________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD AND a Darwin Award has been earned by Floyd Ray Cook, 62, Brookhaven, Georgia
Tennessee fugitive killed in police shoot-out A fugitive accused of shooting a Tennessee police officer and firing at a Kentucky trooper was killed in a shootout with authorities early Friday, ending a nearly weeklong manhunt. Floyd Ray Cook, 62, was pronounced dead at the scene near Burkesville, Ky., after being confronted by state troopers and a federal marshal who were searching an embankment, a Kentucky State Police rep says. Cook was armed with a handgun and exchanged gunfire with the officers, the rep adds. No officers were injured. Cook was accused of shooting and wounding an Algood, Tenn., police officer during a traffic stop last Saturday afternoon and fled in a black Ford truck. Just over an hour later, a Kentucky State Police trooper tried to stop him just beyond the Tennessee state line, authorities say. Cook tried to speed away but wrecked. He allegedly opened fire on the officer, missed, and ran into the woods. A swath of the border between Kentucky and Tennessee had since been gripped with fear of the man authorities described as "armed, dangerous, and desperate." Convicted of rape in the 1970s, Cook was wanted in Marion County, Ky., for failing to comply with the sex offender registry, a sheriff says. He also had previous convictions for robbery, burglary, assault, and riot, and he was wanted in Hardin County on an indictment charging him with trafficking methamphetamine and tampering with evidence.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Dave Re: Keystroke recorder Dear Webby, I hope all is well. I wanted to know if you have hear of a program that will allow your computer to record the keystrokes and then "replay them" (to cut down on repetitive tasks)? Thanks, Dave Dear Dave There are lots of those. They are usually called macro recorders. An old one has been in Windows since 3.1, I think. The XP and up version is described with instructions at Macro Recorder Here is a review of the top ten macro recorders: Top 10 Just pick the one that suits you best. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ A mother took her three year old daughter to church for the first time. The church lights were lowered, and then the choir came down the aisle, carrying lighted candles. All was quiet until the little one started to sing in a loud voice "Happy Birthday to you!" ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Ice for Getting Gum out of a Dryer When I found the gum, I didn't want to put a chemical in my dryer, nor did I want to scrape it with a knife and an ice cube. Here is how I got gum out of my dryer fast. I had saved a couple of those plastic fishnet bottle or candle covers (open at both ends) in my junk drawer. I took a rubber band and sealed off one end of the plastic cover. I filled it with ice and sealed off the other end with another rubber band. I scrubbed using the ice bag as a sponge and followed with a dry rag. It made quick work of getting the gum out of the dryer. By Mary Keenan W. [1] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ During a rather heated argument a teenager said, "I didn't ask to be born." His father: replied, "Good thing you didn't 'Cause the answer would have been 'NO!!!'." ___________________________________________________

Restroom Mirror prank
____________________________________________________ After listening restlessly to a long and tedious sermon, a 6 year old boy asked his father what the preacher did the rest of the week. "Oh, he's a very busy man," the father replied. "He takes care of church business, visits the sick, ministers to the poor...and then he has to have time to rest up. Talking in public isn't an easy job, you know." The boy thought about that, then said, "Well, listening ain't easy, either." ____________________________________________________ Noella's Blunders Saturday mornings in St. Louis I'd walk downtown, shop for a while, eat lunch, catch a movie, and then walk home. This particular day even though my hair was a mess and really needed washing, it was very important that I pick up whatever it was I needed, so I walked downtown. While looking through the electronics department, I noticed on their television that there was a lady whose hair was similar to mine and I thought to myself, well, her hair doesn’t look so bad. The longer I studied the screen I noticed that her clothes were similar to my own. I studied her a while, and I finally realized I was watching myself. This was the first time I’d ever seen a closed-circuit TV in use. I had to look around and make sure no one saw me “admiring” myself before I hurried out. Noella ____________________________________________________
AirShow Budapest Beautiful town and awesome aerobatics

Today, October 31, in
1517 Martin Luther posted the 95 Theses on the door of the 
 Wittenberg Palace Church. The event marked the start of the 
 Protestant Reformation in Germany. 
1914 The Ottoman Empire (Turkey) joined the Central Powers 
 (Germany, Austria-Hungary, and Bulgaria). 
1922 Benito Mussolini became prime minister of Italy. 
1926 Magician Harry Houdini died of gangrene and peritonitis 
 resulting from a ruptured appendix. His appendix had been 
 damaged twelve days earlier when he had been punched in the 
 stomach by a student unexpectedly. During a lecture Houdini 
 had commented on the strength of his stomach muscles and 
 their ability to withstand hard blows. 
1940 The British air victory in the Battle of Britain 
 prevented Germany from invading Britain. 
1941 Mount Rushmore was declared complete after 14 years of work. 
 At the time the 60-foot busts of U.S. Presidents George Washington, 
 Thomas Jefferson, Theodore Roosevelt and Abraham Lincoln 
 were finished. 
1941 The U.S. Navy destroyer Reuben James was torpedoed by a 
 German submarine near Iceland. The U.S. had not yet entered 
 World War II. More than 100 men were killed. 
1952 The U.S. detonated its first hydrogen bomb. 
1954 The Algerian National Liberation Front (FLN) began a 
 revolt against French rule. 
1956 Rear Admiral G.J. Dufek became the first person to land 
 an airplane at the South Pole. Dufek also became the first 
 person to set foot on the South Pole. 
1959 Lee Harvey Oswald, a former U.S. Marine from Fort Worth, 
 TX, announced that he would never return to the U.S. At the 
 time he was in Moscow, Russia. 
1968 U.S. President Lyndon B. Johnson ordered a halt to all U.S. 
 bombing of North Vietnam. 
1969 Wal-Mart Discount City stores were incorporated as 
 Wal-Mart Stores, Inc. 
1981 Antigua and Barbuda became independent of Great Britain. 
1983 The U.S. Defense Department acknowledged that during the 
 U.S. led invasion of Grenada, that a U.S. Navy plane had 
 mistakenly bombed a civilian hospital. 
1984 Indian Prime Minister Indira Gandhi was assassinated near 
 her residence by two Sikh security guards. Her son, Rajiv, 
 was sworn in as prime minister. 
1992 In Liberia, it was announced that five American nuns had 
 been killed near Monrovia. Rebels loyal to Charles Taylor were 
 blamed for the murders. 
1994 68 people were killed when an American Eagle ATR-72, plunged 
 into a northern Indiana farm. 
1997 Louise Woodward, British au pair, was sentenced to life in 
 prison after being convicted of second-degree murder in the death 
 of 8-month-old Matthew Eappen. She was released after her sentence 
 was reduced to manslaughter. 
1998 Iraq announced that it was halting all dealings with U.N. arms 
 inspectors. The inspectors were investigating the country's weapons 
 of mass destruction stemming from Iraq's invasion of Kuwait in 1990. 
1999 EgyptAir Flight 990 crashed off the coast of Nantucket, MA, 
 killing all 217 people aboard. 
1999 Leaders from the Roman Catholic Church and the Lutheran Church 
 signed the Joint Declaration on the Doctrine of Justification. The 
 event ended a centuries-old doctrinal dispute over the nature of 
 faith and salvation. 
2007 Google shares hit $700 for the first time. 
2008 Distribution Video Audio, Inc. shipped its final shipment of 
 VHS tapes to stores. The company was the last major United States 
 supplier of pre-recorded VHS tapes. 
2015  smiled.


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How do you know a caller is a scammer? 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Friday, October 30
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!


Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Georgia man, who was arrested after he smashed Waffle House door to protest 50-cent biscuit hike Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 29, in 1831 Escaped slave Nat Turner was apprehended in Southampton County, VA, several weeks after leading the bloodiest slave uprising in American history. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example. Mark Twain (1835 - 1910) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ At a fancy reception a young man was asked by a widow to guess her age. "You must have some idea," she urged as he hesitated. "I have several ideas," he admitted with a smile, "the trouble is that I don't know whether to make it ten years younger because of your looks of ten years older because of your wisdom." ______________________________________________________ HOW FAITHS FIGHT FIRES Recently, just as an ecumenical gathering was commencing, a secretary rushed in shouting, "The building is on fire!" The Methodists gathered in a corner and prayed. The Baptists cried, "Where is the water?" The Quakers quietly praised God for blessings that fire brings. The Lutherans posted a notice on the door declaring that fire was evil. The Roman Catholics called Rome for instructions. The Jews blamed the Christians and demanded they should pay. The Congregationalists shouted, "Every man for himself." The Fundamentalists proclaimed, "It's the vengeance of God!" The Episcopalians formed a procession and marched out. The Christian Scientists concluded that the toxic fumes from the burning carpets would kill them before the fire reached them. The Presbyterians appointed a chairperson, who was to appoint a committee to look into the matter and submit a written report. The Pentecostals danced and sang with joy, "The Pentecostal fire has come!" The Unity Students proclaimed the fire had no power over them. Some Atheists in attendance didn't believe there was a fire. The Muslims stated it was Ahlla's will. The Pastafarians grabbed the fire extinguisher, put out the fire and conrtinued eating their spaghetti. ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Noella for this picture: ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!
______________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD AND a Darwin Award has been earned by Mitchell Harris Feinberg, 39, Brookhaven, Georgia
Man arrested after he smashed Waffle House door to protest 50-cent biscuit hike Mitchell Harris Feinberg, 39, was arrested Sunday morning after police said he shattered the front door of a Waffle House in Brookhaven, Georgia. The reason for the breakfast breaking: He was allegedly angry the restaurant raised the price for a sausage biscuit from $1 to $1.50, WSBTV.com reports. A Waffle House waitress told police that when Feinberg saw the bill with the 50-cent price hike, he became belligerent because “someone had only charged him $1 [for a sausage biscuit] on previous dates,” according to the Atlanta Journal-Constitution. Surveillance video reportedly shows the suspect get up from a corner booth, throw his bill on the floor and kick the front door on his way out. When the glass shattered, Feinberg fled the scene, only to be arrested outside a nearby apartment complex a short time later. Police said Feinberg told them he "barely kicked the door” when it shattered, and said he only kicked it because “he did not want to open the greasy door with his hand,” according to the police report. Feinberg was booked into the DeKalb County Jail on charges of disorderly conduct, criminal trespass and criminal damage to property. He remains in custody in lieu of $2,500 bond. The Brookhaven Police Dept. decided to use the incident as a teachable moment on Facebook.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Christine Re: How do you know a caller is a scammer? Dear Webby, How do I know a caller is a scammer? Couldn't it be somebody helpful? Christine Dear Christine Except for close friends, NOBODY legitimate calls you out of the blue about supposed problems in your computer. You can ignore those totally phony messages about Microsoft contacting you if they ever find out why a program locked up. That's from Windows 3, and they have never contacted anybody yet, as far as I know. If the caller claims to be from your ISP, then they are just as phony. Your ISP does not give a hoot about what goes on inside your computer, as long as YOU don't call them. The same goes for anybody calling and asking any information "to verify that it is really you." Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Who is known as the "godfather of America"? German geographer and mapmaker Martin Waldseemueller, whose book "Cosmographiae Introductio" was first published in 1507, named the New World "America" in the mistaken belief that it was Italian navigator and merchant Amerigo Vespucci who discovered the new continent. And the Indians are forever grateful that they were not discovered while somebody got lost on the way to Turkey. ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Sorting Socks into Pairs The one item I never put into a dryer is socks, because they always seem to shrink in there. So instead they get hung on the washing line on good days, or indoors on a foldaway airer on rainy days. Either way, this makes for a good opportunity to sort socks into pairs at an optimum time. It's a job I am sure that most of us hate, but if you do it as you hang them up it is an absolute breeze to sort out which matches what. Then very simply bunch the pairs together as you take them down once they are dry. Have a shoe box or something similar for odd socks and keep them in there for a few weeks in case their partners turn up on a subsequent washday. By ShirleyE [29] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ A young mother was visiting a doctor friend and made no attempt to restrain her four-year-old son, who was ransacking an adjoining room. But finally, an extra loud clatter of bottles did prompt her to say, "I hope you don't mind Johnny being in there." "Nah," said the doctor calmly, "That's just poisons in there. They take some time but are quite effective. He'll be quiet soon." ___________________________________________________

The drunk
____________________________________________________ On little Larry's first day of first grade, he raised his hand as soon as the teacher came into the room and said, I don't belong here, I should be in third grade!' The teacher looked at little Larry's records and told him to please take his seat. Not five minutes passed when little Larry stood up again and said, I don't belong here, I should be in the third grade!' Larry did this a few more times before the principal came along and the teacher explained Larry's problem. The principal told little Larry that if he could answer some questions that they could decide in which grade he belonged. Well, they soon discovered that Larry knew all the state capitals and country capitals that the principal could think of. The teacher suggested they try some biology questions. What does a cow have 4 of but a woman has only 2?' asked the teacher. 'Legs!' Larry immediately replied. What does a man have in his pants that a woman doesn't?' asked the teacher. Pockets!' said Larry. The teacher looked at the principal, who said, Maybe he should be in third grade, I flunked those last two questions!' ____________________________________________________ Noella's Blunders For as long as I can remember I've been plagued with trying to remember names and faces. All the tried and true remedies failed. One day in the checkout lane at a new grocery store, a young man came up, pushed my cart away, and started bagging my groceries. I was wondering now how am I going to get them out to my car, they're way too heavy to carry. I was about to ask for the cart when he asked if I wanted help. Irritated, I said yes,¯ thinking now that you pushed my cart away, you CAN take them out for me. However, he was very pleasant and chatted about what a nice day it was. I replied that yes it WAS a nice day, I just needed to find my car. (I also forget stuff like that.) He responded, "Oh that's okay, I see it."¯ Surprised, I asked, How do YOU know where my car is?" His reply -- "I'm your next-door neighbor!"¯ Noella ____________________________________________________
Let's arm chair travel around this big ol' beautiful world we live on. It will only take about a week.

Today, October 30, in
1817 The independent government of Venezuela was established 
 by Simon Bolivar. 
1831 Escaped slave Nat Turner was apprehended in Southampton 
 County, VA, several weeks after leading the bloodiest slave 
 uprising in American history. 
1875 The constitution of Missouri was ratified by popular vote. 
1893 The U.S. Senate gave final approval to repeal the Sherman 
 Silver Purchase Act of 1890. 
1894 The time clock was patented by Daniel M. Cooper. 
1938 Orson Welles' "The War of the Worlds" aired on CBS radio. 
 The belief that the realistic radio dramatization was a live 
 news event about a Martian invasion caused panic among listeners. 
1945 The U.S. government announced the end of shoe rationing. 
1953 General George C. Marshall was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. 
1961 The Soviet Union tested a hydrogen bomb with a force of 
 approximately 58 megatons. 
1972 U.S. President Richard Nixon approved legislation to increase 
 Social Security spending by $5.3 billion. 
1972 45 people were killed when two trains collided in Chicago. 
1975 Prince Juan Carlos assumed power in Spain as dictator 
 Francisco Franco was near death. 
1975 The New York Daily News ran the headline "Ford to City: 
 Drop Dead." The headline came a day after U.S. President 
 Gerald R. Ford said he would veto any proposed federal 
 bailout of New York City. 
1984 In Poland, police found the body of kidnapped pro-Solidarity 
 priest Father Jerry Popieluszko. His death was blamed on four 
 security officers. 
1989 Mitsubishi Estate Company announced it would buy 51 percent 
 of Rockefeller Group Inc. of New York. 
1993 Martin Fettman, America's first veterinarian in space, 
 performed the world's first animal dissections in space, 
 while aboard the space shuttle Columbia. 
1993 The United Nations deadline concerning ousted Haitian 
 President Jean-Bertrand Aristide passed with country's military 
 still in control. 
1995 Federalist prevailed over separatists in Quebec in a 
 referendum concerning secession from the federation of Canada. 
1998 The terrorist who hijacked a Turkish Airlines plane and the 
 39 people on board was killed when anti-terrorist squads raided 
 the plane. 
2001 In New York City, U.S. President George W. Bush threw out 
 the first pitch at Game 3 of the World Series between the New 
 York Yankees and the Arizona Diamondbacks. 
2001 Michael Jordan returned to the NBA with the Washington Wizards 
 after a 3 1/2 year retirement. The Wizards lost 93-91 to the 
 New York Knicks.
2015  smiled.


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Phone call about computer problems 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Thursday, October 29

Thank you, Pat!!
Thank you Clyde!

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award and a Darwin Award goes to a Dopey UCSB Student, who died from blood loss after punching through window Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 29, in 1652 The Massachusetts Bay Colony proclaimed itself to be an independent commonwealth. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ The best ideas come as jokes. Make your thinking as funny as possible. --- David M. Ogilvy "Committees have become so important nowadays that subcommittees have to be appointed to do the work." --- Laurence J. Peter ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ More than anything, a young man from the city wanted to be a cowboy. Eventually he found a rancher who took pity on him and gave the lad a chance. "This," he said, showing him a rope, "is a lariat. We use it to catch cows." "I see," said the man, trying to seem knowledgeable as he examined the lariat. "And what do you use for bait?" "City Slickers. Cows love chasing and scaring them." ______________________________________________________ The other night, Joe and his wife were going out for dinner. She put on eyebrow pencil, eye shadow, eyeliner, eyelashes, mascara, toner, blush, lipstick, and then turned to me and a dozen other mysterious concoctions, and then asked: "Does this look natural?" ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!
______________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD AND a Darwin Award has been earned by Andres Esteban Sanchez, 20, Poway, California
Dopey UCSB Student Dies from Blood Loss After Punching Through Window UCSB student Andres “Andy” Sanchez died in surgery Sunday morning at Cottage Hospital two hours after he punched through a window in his Isla Vista apartment and severely lacerated his arm. According to the Nexus report, which relied on information provided by Senior Deputy James McKarrell with the Isla Vista Foot Patrol, Sheriff’s deputies responded at approx 4:40 a.m. to the 6700 block of Abrego Road after receiving calls of a male subject running down the street screaming for help. When deputies came upon a panicked Sanchez in a nearby apartment complex, three people were holding him down and attempting to calm him. A blanket had been wrapped around his arm, and when the deputies removed it, they observed a “cut approximately three-quarter inches in diameter around his arm.” Witnesses said blood was “literally flying” from the wound. Sanchez, a second-year pre-biology major from Poway, California, was transported to Cottage Hospital but died from blood loss just before 7 a.m. One of Sanchez’s roommates told authorities he had rushed into their apartment earlier in the evening “talking gibberish, and obviously under the influence of drugs” the Nexus reported. At some point he punched through a window and cut his arm on the broken glass.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Francine Re: Phone call about computer problems Dear Webby, You sure saved me some trouble today. I am sure glad I was able to contact you via Skype while I was on the phone with the scammer. You were hilarious! Please tell all the subscribers about our little adventure! You got a much better way with words than I do. Francine Dear Francine OK, will do. Francine got a call from somebody with an Indian or Pakistani accent, telling her that she has problems in her computer, that are affecting her ISP and the Internet. Francine is a pretty smart lady and thought that was not right. So she correctly guessed that my Skype handle is dearwebby, and contacted me, while stalling the scammer. As they usually do, he told her to click on START, type Eventvwr and hit Enter. Eventvwr is some ancient viewer from troubleshooting Windows during developing Windows95, and the "events" shown are totally harmless and of interest only to programmers. A print job, for example, can generate a dozen or more Warnings and Errors, before Windows and the Printer agree on a proper handshake. No big deal. That's how Windows works. The scammer tried to scare Francine about the Warnings and Errors, and I fed Francine smart-ass remarks and dumb questions to sidetrack the scammer. Needless to say, she did not download anything and did not agree to anything. The scammer wanted her to download a program, so that he could reach into her computer and "assist" her in fixing the problems. Yeah, right. Much fun was had by us giving the scammer the runaround. After we tired of that nonsense, Francine told the scammer what to do with a Billy-Goat. If you get a call from anybody telling you that you have problems in your computer, don't download anything, don't go visit any pages, don't agree to anything, and don't give them any information, no correct information anyway. Play stupid, difficult, paranoid, aggressive, whatever. Just don't cooperate. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ On their 40th wedding anniversary, during the banquet, the husband was asked to give his friends a brief account of the benefits of a marriage of such long duration. One in the crowd said, "Tell us, just what is it you have learned from all those wonderful years with your wife?" The husband said, "Well, I've learned that marriage is the best teacher of all. It teaches you loyalty, meekness, forbearance, self-restraint, forgiveness . . and a lot of other disciplines that you wouldn't have needed if you had stayed single." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Uses for Mint Tins I hate to throw away those cute mint tins so I've come up with a few idea's to use them in the car or purse. I put in some almonds/cashews (or your favorite) nuts to keep in the car for when I get a snack urge. Then I don't buy junk food......as often~ I also keep a few of my husband's meds in a tin, then if we are out visiting and stay over, he always has them! I bring along my vitamin supplements that I take. I also bring along chewable vitamins like calcium chews or gummies for adults that we never seem to want to take at home and have them on the road. Then our gummy snack is actually a healthy one! It's a great mini first aid kit and can hold quite a number of band aids, ibuprofen, alcohol wipes, etc. I always keep a $20 bill and a number of quarters in the car as well. You could lose a wallet, run out of gas without your credit card, need toll money. You never know! If you like to take spontaneous hikes or nature walks, a tin with a few additional items like: a whistle, matches (and the relighting birthday candles!) plus a pocket knife, mirror (for signaling if lost) are great to carry along! These are ideas for just the car/purse, in the house the options are endless! So don't throw out those tins! By Donna [291] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ We stopped for a quick meal and the waiter brought us each a bowl of soup. As the waiter turned away to return to the kitchen, Pa stopped him, calling: "Waiter!" "Yes ,sir, is there something wrong?" "The soup. Taste it," replied Pa. "I beg your pardon, Sir?" "Taste it." "But, Sir, I can assure you that the soup is excellent." "Taste it," Pa persisted. "Sir, the soup was made this morning of the finest ingredients." "Taste it!" The exasperated waiter finally relented. "All right, Sir, I'll taste it." Then after a pause he said, "Where is the spoon?" To which Pa replied triumphantly, "Ah ha ... " ___________________________________________________

I GOT this dance!
____________________________________________________ The customer in the Italian restaurant was so pleased that he asked to speak to the chef. The owner proudly led him into the kitchen and introduced him to the chef. "Your veal parmigiana was superb," the customer said. "I just spent a month in Italy, and yours is better than any I ever had over there." "Naturally," the chef said. "Over there, they use domestic cheese. Ours is imported." ____________________________________________________ Noella's Blunders The year was 1974, I didn't have a crock pot or any other modern kitchen doodads. I had just moved into a new apartment and equipping a kitchen was the least of my concerns. As long as the oven made heat and the fridge made cold, I was satisfied. Anyway, a friend was coming over for dinner so I had to draw from my scant culinary skills. PBJ sandwiches came to mind but I was able to fend off the thought. I'd heard that you could put a roast in the oven, turn it on to 200 F (93.3 C), and let it cook all day. Sounded okay to me so in the oven went the roast and I left for work. Eight hours later, I drove up to my apartment (an old house that was divided into units) and as I'm getting out of the car, I'm wondering what IS that odor? The closer I got to my door, the stronger it became. I followed the plume to a white oven that was now several endearing shades of brown. As if the experience hadn’t done enough damage to my ego, I proceeded to open the oven door. I didn't see how any more smoke could be in there, but my judgment was about to take the same beating my ego had suffered. There was a big enough cloud in there to darken all the adjacent apartments and then some! After gaining some modicum of composure, I grabbed a pair of pot holders and blindly reached around for the pan that held my roast. I found it just as I was ready to collapse from smoke inhalation and carried it out to the front porch. I tried to take the lid off but It wouldn't budge. After several minutes of praying and prying with a screwdriver, I was finally able to pop the lid. Once the smoke from inside the pan had cleared, I saw what had happened to my beautiful roast. I poked it with the screwdriver and found that it went all the way through to the air beneath the crust. Ninety five percent of my beautiful roast was billowing out of my apartment windows - the other five percent was in my lungs. It had not been a good day. I later discovered that my oven had one tiny eccentricity. No matter what I set it for, it cooked at 550 F (288 C). If I had gone to my mail box, it would have been done by the time I got back. Those PBJ sandwiches were sounding better by the minute. ____________________________________________________
18 reasons you should never travel to Chiapas.

Today, October 29, in
1618 Sir Walter Raleigh was beheaded under a sentence that 
 had been brought against him 15 years earlier for conspiracy 
 against King James I. 
1652 The Massachusetts Bay Colony proclaimed itself to be an 
 independent commonwealth. 
1682 William Penn landed at what is now Chester, PA. He was 
 the founder of Pennsylvania. 
1863 The International Committee of the Red Cross was founded. 
1901 Leon Czolgosz, the assassin of U.S. President McKinley, 
 was electrocuted. 
1923 Turkey formally became a republic after the dissolution 
 of the Ottoman Empire. The first president was Mustafa Kemal, 
 later known as Kemal Ataturk. 
1929 America's Great Depression began with the crash of the 
 Wall Street stock market. 
1940 The first peacetime military draft began in the U.S. 
1945 The first ballpoint pens to be made commercially went 
 on sale at Gimbels Department Store in New York at the price 
 of $12.50 each. 
1956 Israel invaded Egypt's Sinai Peninsula during the Suez 
 Canal Crisis. 
1959 General Mills became the first corporation to use 
 close-circuit television. 
1960 Muhammad Ali (Cassius Clay) won his first professional fight. 
1966 The National Organization for Women was founded. 
1969 The U.S. Supreme Court ordered an immediate end to all 
 school segregation. 
1973 O.J. Simpson, of the Buffalo Bills, set two NFL records. 
 He carried the ball 39 times and he ran 157 yards putting him 
 over 1,000 yards at the seventh game of the season. 
1974 U.S. President Gerald Ford signed a new law forbidding 
 discrimination in credit applications on the basis of sex or 
 marital status 
1990 The U.N. Security Council voted to hold Saddam Hussein's 
 regime liable for human rights abuses and war damages during 
 its occupation of Kuwait. 
1991 The U.S. Galileo spacecraft became the first to visit an 
 asteroid (Gaspra). 
1991 Trade sanctions were imposed on Haiti by the U.S. to 
 pressure the new leaders to restore the ousted President 
 Jean-Bertrand Aristide to power. 
1992 Depo Provera, a contraceptive, was approved by the 
 Food and Drug Administration. 
1995 Jerry Rice of the San Francisco 49ers became the NFL's 
 career leader in receiving yards with 14,040 yards. 
1998 South Africa's Truth and Reconciliation Commission 
 condemned both apartheid and violence committed by the 
 African National Congress. 
1998 The space shuttle Discovery blasted off with John Glenn 
 on board. Glenn was 77 years old. In 1962 he became the 
 first American to orbit the Earth. 
1998 The oldest known copy of Archimedes' work sold for 
 $2 million at a New York auction. 
2001 KTLA broadcasted the first coast to coast HDTV 
 network telecast. 
2014 The smartwatch Microsoft Band was released. 
2015  smiled.


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Good Morning, ,
Today is Wednesday, October 28

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Florida man, who was arrested for attacking a Karaoke DJ over mic volume Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 28, in 1636 Harvard College was founded in Massachusetts. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ Somebody has to do something, and it's just incredibly pathetic that it has to be us. --- Jerry Garcia, (of the Grateful Dead) "The nine most terrifying words in the English language are, 'I'm from the government and I'm here to help.' --- Ronald Reagan ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ The basketball coach stormed into the university President's office and demanded a raise right then and there. "Please," protested the college President, "you already make more than the entire History department." "Yeah, maybe so, but you don't know what I have to put up with," the coach blustered. "Look, I'll Give you an example." The coach went out into the hall and grabbed a jock who was jogging down the hallway. "Run over to my office and see if I'm there," he ordered. Twenty minutes later the jock returned, sweaty and out of breath. "You're not there, sir," he reported. "Oh, I see what you mean," conceded the President, scratching his head. "I would have phoned first." ______________________________________________________ Soon after marriage, a lady's husband stopped wearing his wedding ring. She asked, "Why don't you ever wear your wedding band?" He replied, "It cuts off my circulation." She answered back, "It's supposed to!" ______________________________________________________ Kansas My friend shared this tree with me. I thought you might enjoy it too. Be safe and careful. You are a valued person. Janice ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!
______________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Joshua Fort, 26, DeBary, Florida,
Florida man was arrested for attacking Karaoke DJ over mic sound The only record this karaoke singer will have is a criminal one. A man in DeBary, Florida, was arrested Thursday morning after police said he assaulted a karaoke DJ at Blackie's Bar. Joshua Fort, 26, was performing the Jay Z and Justin Timberlake jam "Holy Grail' with another man, when he sounded a discordant note at the job being done by DJ Omar Isaac, according to the Daytona Beach News-Journal. Police said when Isaac didn't pump up the volume on Fort's microphone, the suspect responded in a way that speaks volumes. First, Fort grabbed the DJ’s laptop computer and slammed it shut. Then witnesses said the suspect threw a glass at Isaac that hit the DJ on the side of his head. Fort is also accused of pulling the DJ to the dance floor and throwing him on the ground there, according to WNDB.com. Fort fled the scene, but later turned himself into the Volusia County Jail, where he was charged with aggravated battery with a deadly weapon. He was released on $5,000 bond. The suspect told police he ran from the karaoke bar because because he “knew he was going to be in trouble” and that “everyone would point fingers at him,” according to a police report obtained by WNDB.com. Before his arrest, he was treated at a local hospital for injury to his left hand. Because the alleged crime centered around karaoke, the Florida Sun-Sentinel suggested the suspect be shipped off to Sing Sing.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Neil Re: Tracker PDF editor Dear Webby, PDF Exchange does have a free version that is likely to be close to the same as Nitro. On their main page, in the upper left corner just below the banner is a graphic that says Get Free PDF Viewer now. If you click on that graphic it will download the free viewer. I liked their product so much that I purchased it, but I have many pdf docs that I must edit and annotate. http://www.tracker-software.com/ Neil Dear Neil Thank you for that info! Marlene also reported on that: "this is a program I have used for several years. this version is free" Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ A minister was planning a wedding at the close of the Sunday morning service. After the benediction he had planned to call the couple down to be married for a brief ceremony before the congregation. For the life of him, he couldn't think of the names of those who were to be married. So he simply asked: "Will those wanting to get married please come to the front?" Immediately, nine single ladies, four widows, tree widowers, two single men and a lady in a formal wedding gown stepped to the front. ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Molasses Sugar Cookies This is a crisp spice cookie. I make them every Christmas and give some away for gifts. They were my late mother's favorite and it reminds me of her when I make them. Approximate Time: About 15 minutes plus 1 hour chilling and 8-10 min.baking time Yield: Approximately 3 doz. Ingredients: 3/4 cup shortening 1 cup sugar 1/4 cup molasses 1 egg 2 tsp baking soda 2 cups flour 1/2 tsp cloves 1/2 tsp ginger 1 tsp cinnamon 1/2 tsp salt Steps: Melt the shortening in a 3 or 4 quart saucepan over low heat. Remove from heat and let cool. Then add sugar, molasses and egg and beat well using an electric hand mixer. In a separate bowl combine the flour with the rest of the dry ingredients. Mix the wet and dry ingredients together. Chill for 1 hour. Form into 1 inch balls and roll in granulated sugar. Place on a greased cookie sheet, a silicon mat or parchment paper. Space about 2 inches apart. Bake at 375ŗF for 8-10 minutes. Source: A recipe on the bottle of Brer Rabbit Molasses By Diana W. [12] You can drastically cut down on the sugar and increase molasses to get traditional soft gingerbread cookies. You have to add more flour until you can roll the dough into balls. They will melt into flat cookies in the oven. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ One day, Jean-Claude decided to take a trip from Montreal (where he lived) to that great city of Boston.. He went to the airport to buy a ticket and found out the cost was $200 one-way. Well Jean-Claude only had $110 on him. But he saw a sign saying half-fare for persons under 18. Well, now Jean-Claude had just turned 18 three months ago so he lied..a bit. And got a ticket for $100. Well during the flight, he talking with the passenger seated next to him. And, in the course of their little chat, he boisterously mentioned the 18th birthday party his friends had for him. Since Jean-Claude talked fairly loudly, a stewardess happened to over-hear that part of the conversation and remembered from the passenger list that Jean-Claude had only paid half-fare. A few minutes later, the stewardess asked Jean-Claude if he had $50 with him. Jean-Claude, slightly embarrassed, replied, "I only have $10, enough for a bus and a coffee after we arrive in Boston.. Why you ask?" Stewardess:"I wanted to know if you wanted to buy this used parachute." Jean-Claude, "What for?" Stewardess, "You only paid half-fare and you're over 18. We are half-way on our flight and you have to leave now." ___________________________________________________

the internet cloud is not where you think
____________________________________________________ A passenger train in California is creeping along, slowly. Finally it creaks to a halt. A passenger sees a conductor walking by outside. "What's going on?" she yells out the window. "Cow on the track!" replies the conductor. Ten minutes later, the train resumes its slow pace. Within five minutes, however, it stops again. The woman sees the same conductor walk again. She leans out the window and yells, "What happened? Did we catch up with the cow again?" ---------------- Yeah, I remember a train like that in Austria. It had little porches at each end of the wagons and signs posted: "Picking flowers while the train is in motion is not permitted." Seems the locomotive engineer got annoyed when the flower pickers passed the train. ____________________________________________________ Noella's Blunders Out of Cascade? Wanna know what happens when you use about a quarter-cup full of Dawn dish soap in the dishwasher? Well, I did one day! I'm in my bedroom curling my hair to go somewhere, and I hear one of the twins in the kitchen. "Uh, Noella? I think you need to come in here." "Why? You guys need to get ready." "Uh, Noella? There's suds all over the floor, Lots of suds, they're covering the whole floor!" I groan, walk into the kitchen, and sure enough, there ARE suds all over the floor. They're headed for the computer sitting on the floor just a few feet away. The boys bring lots of towels from the bathroom and I call my husband, who is laughing his head off. His solution - get out my Rainbow (dust and dirt is sucked into a container of water) and start vacuuming the water out. You know what happens when you vacuum suds with a Rainbow? The motor starts sounding funny. So, I shut it off and open it, to find that it took the water out of the dishwasher okay but now suds are way up in the motor. I did remember the salesman told us that if that ever happened, disconnect from the water housing and run dry. Now not only is the floor still covered with suds, there's more water plus oil on the floor. And we've got to be somewhere in just a few minutes! Moral of the story is - unless you want to use LOTS of towels to sop up water, never, ever use Dawn dish soap in your dishwasher! ____________________________________________________
Someone had a lot of time on their hands centuries ago!

Today, October 28, in
1636 Harvard College was founded in Massachusetts.
1776 The Battle of White Plains took place during the 
 American Revolutionary War. 
1793 Eli Whitney applied for a patent for his cotton gin. 
1886 The Statue of Liberty was dedicated in New York Harbor 
 by U.S. President Cleveland. The statue weighs 225 tons and 
 is 152 feet tall. It was originally known as "Liberty 
 Enlightening the World." 
1904 The St. Louis Police Department became the first to use 
 fingerprinting. 
1919 The U.S. Congress enacted the Volstead Act, also known 
 as the National Prohibition Act. Prohibition was repealed in 
 1933 with the passing of the 21st Amendment to the U.S. 
 Constitution. 
1922 Benito Mussolini took control of the Italian government 
 and introduced fascism to Italy. 
1940 During World War II, Italy invaded Greece. 
1962 Soviet leader Nikita Khrushchev informed the U.S. that 
 he had ordered the dismantling of Soviet missile bases in Cuba. 
1965 Pope Paul VI issued a decree absolving Jews of collective 
 guilt for the crucifixion of Jesus Christ. 
1965 The Gateway Arch along the waterfront in St. Louis, MO, 
 was completed. 
1976 John D. Erlichman, a former aide to U.S. President Richard 
 Nixon, entered a federal prison camp in Safford, AZ, to begin 
 serving his sentence for Watergate-related convictions. 
1983 The U.S. vetoed a U.N. Security Council resolution "deeply 
 deploring" the ongoing U.S.-led invasion of Grenada. 
1985 John A. Walker Jr. and his son, Michael Lance Walker, pled 
 guilty to charges of spying for the Soviet Union. 
1988 Roussel Uclaf, a French manufacturer that produces the abortion 
 pill RU486, announced it would resume distribution of the drug 
 after the government of France demanded it do so. 
1990 Iraq announced that it was halting gasoline rationing. 
1993 Ousted Haitian President Jean-Bertrand Aristide, called for a 
 complete blockade of Haiti to force out the military leaders. 
1994 U.S. President Clinton visited Kuwait and implied that all the 
 troops there would be home by Christmas. 
2015  smiled.


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PDF form fillers 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Tuesday, October 27

Thank you Jim H.!!!!

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to an Iowa man, who was arrested after stealing a taxi Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 21, in 1659 William Robinson and Marmaduke Stevenson became the first Quakers to be executed in America. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ Statistics: The only science that enables different experts using the same figures to draw different conclusions. --- Evan Esar (1899 - 1995) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ A grandmother overheard her five-year-old granddaughter playing "wedding." The wedding vows went like this: "You have the right to remain silent, anything you say will be turned around and used against you, you have the right to have an attorney present. You may kiss the bride today." ______________________________________________________ Three wives were bemoaning their husbands' attitudes towards leftovers. "It gets rough," one said. "My husband is a Movie Producer and he calls them 'reruns'." "You think you have it bad," was the reply. "Mine is a Quality Control Engineer and he calls them 'rejects'!" "That's nothing compared to me," said the third lady. "My husband is a mortician. He calls them 'remains'!" ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Jim Hetrick for sending this picture, taken by Don Hole, one of his former students, who works the midnight shift at the Outer Banks Fishing Pier.: ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!
______________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Luis Orellana-Rivera, 26, Des Moines, Iowa
Iowa man was arrested after stealing a taxi An Iowa resident arrested for stealing a taxi moments after his release from a Des Moines hospital told cops that he boosted the ride because he did not want to walk the six blocks to his residence. According to police, Luis Orellana-Rivera, 26, hopped into a running cab parked outside Mercy Medical Center. The taxi driver told cops that he pulled up to the hospital’s front doors and left the car running as he made a delivery to the blood bank. Pictured in the above mug shot, Orellana-Rivera allegedly swiped the car around 6:15 AM Friday, immediately after his discharge. Shortly after the taxi’s owner reported the vehicle stolen, Des Moines Police Department cops used GPS data to locate the Ford Crown Victoria, which was parked less than a mile from the hospital. Orellana-Rivera was arrested as he exited the vehicle, which was in a lot behind his former residence. A “friend/former roommate” told police that Orellana-Rivera “has been having mental issues lately due to drug usage,” and has been “delusional and paranoid.” Orellana-Rivera, who had the cab’s keys in his pants pocket, told police that he opted to steal the car instead of walking home from the hospital. Orellana-Rivera, who spent about six hours at the medical center, was wearing a hospital bracelet and had a pulse oxygen device still attached to his finger when apprehended. Orellana-Rivera was arrested for felony theft and jailed in the Polk County lockup (where he is being held in lieu of $5000 bond).
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Edith Re: PDF form fillers Dear Webby, You mentioned Nitro PDF program a couple of weeks ago. My sister told me to get PDF-Exchange from Tracker-software. What is the difference? Edith Dear Edith If you just want to fill an occasional form, then the Nitro will be cheaper. They have a free Reader, that has limited "typing" abilities. For buying stuff or filling out your taxes, that's good enough. PDF-Exchange has no free version that i can see, but they have much better typing and editing abilities. If you are writing e-books and want to do fancy formatting, then you might want to check out the PDF-Exchange. You would still write the e-books with Open Office or WORD, and save them as PDF. However, since neither of those two are that good for picking up a PDF file and edit it, an editor like Nitro or PDF-Exchange are handy for quickly fixing a typo instead of opening the word processor doc, fixing the typo, and saving it as PDF again. And of course, filling forms is much easier with a dedicated PDF program like those two. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ A dog thinks: Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide me with a nice warm, dry house, pet me, and take good care of me . . . They must be Gods! A cat thinks: Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide me with a nice warm, dry house, pet me, and take good care of me . . . I must be a God! ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Use a Splatter Screen For Popcorn Here is a tip to release the aroma of popcorn but protect it from anything entering. Simply use a splatter screen cover. Great for home, picnics, or parties! By KIM HOGGAN [6] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Upon entering the little country store, the stranger noticed a sign saying: DANGER! BEWARE OF DOG! posted on the glass door. Inside he noticed an old hound dog sound asleep on the floor half way between the door and the cash register. He asked the store manager, "Is THAT the dog folks are supposed to beware of?" "Yep, that's him," he replied. The stranger couldn't help but be amused. "That certainly doesn't look like a dangerous dog to me. Why in the world would you post that sign?" "Because," the owner replied, "before I posted that sign, people kept tripping over him and bashing their teeth out on the counter." ___________________________________________________

GoPro: Backflip Over 72ft Canyon
____________________________________________________ I couldn't help overhearing a man at a nearby pay phone. "I know it's something you want," he said earnestly, "but I don't think tattoos are a good idea. And the same goes for body piercing. As long as you're living in my house, I think you should respect my wishes." I was secretly cheering him on for his fatherly firmness. Then came the 'coup de grace': "Besides, Ma, you're 87 years old! You don't NEED a tattoo and a nose ring!" ____________________________________________________ Noella's Blunders It's not a cooking story, but here's one: I have several friends who consider themselves to be very spiritual.¯ They advised that I should watch the sunrise every morning — that it would be a very spiritual experience for me. It sounded good, so the next morning I got up early enough to catch it. I was still lying in my bed when I looked out the window and saw the most beautiful yellow light ever. I gazed on that sun as it was rising in the sky and felt an awesome sense of peace. Then it slowly dawned on me that the sun wasn't rising. I went to the window to check it out and found myself staring at the light pole across the street! I had a really spiritual epihany when I saw the light. It was time to clean the windows. ____________________________________________________
Russian Dance Group Float across the Stage

Today, October 27, in
1659 William Robinson and Marmaduke Stevenson became the 
 first Quakers to be executed in America. 
1858 Roland Macy opened Macy's Department Store in New York 
 City. It was Macy's eighth business adventure, the other 
 seven failed. 
1878 The Manhattan Savings Bank in New York City was robbed 
 of over $3,000,000. The robbery was credited to George 
 "Western" Leslie even though there was not enough evidence 
 to convict him, only two of his associates were convicted. 
1904 The New York subway system officially opened. It was 
 the first rapid-transit subway system in America. 
1925 Fred Waller received a patent for water skis. 
1927 The first newsreel featuring sound was released in 
 New York. 
1931 Chuhei Numbu of Japan set a long jump record at 
 26' 2 1/4". 
1938 Du Pont announced "nylon" as the new name for its 
 new synthetic yarn. 
1947 "You Bet Your Life," the radio show starring 
 Grouch Marx, premiered on ABC. It was later shown on 
 NBC television. 
1954 Marilyn Monroe and Joe DiMaggio were divorced. 
 They had been married on January 14, 1954. 
1962 The Soviet Union adds to the Cuban Missile Crisis 
 by calling for the dismantling of U.S. missile basis 
 in Turkey. U.S. President Kennedy agreed to the new 
 aspect of the agreement. 
1978 Egyptian President Anwar Sadat and Israeli Prime 
 Minister Menachem Begin were named winners of the 
 Nobel Peace Prize for their progress toward achieving 
 a Middle East accord. 
1994 The U.S. Justice Department announced that the 
 U.S. prison population had exceeded one million for 
 the first time in American history. 
2002 Emmitt Smith (Dallas Cowboys) became the all-time 
 leading rusher in the NFL when he extended his career 
 yardage to 16,743. He achieved the record in his 193rd 
 game. He also scored his 150th career touchdown. 
2002 Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva was elected president of 
 Brazil in a runoff. He was the country's first elected 
 leftist leader. 
2003 Bank of America Corp. announced it had agreed to buy 
 FleetBoston Financial Corp. The deal created the second 
 largest banking company in the U.S.
2015  smiled.


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How to clear the cache in Chrome 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Monday, October 26

Thank you Shalla

Back in the saddle again.
Next injections are on January 8.

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Drunk collegian, who called 911, claimed she is "Olivia Pope" and then warned cop of car bomb heading for White House Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 21, in 1881 The "Gunfight at the OK Corral" took place in Tombstone, AZ. The fight was between Wyatt Earp, his two brothers and Doc Holiday against the Ike Clanton Gang. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other. --- Voltaire (1764) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ An EMT in southern Georgia was part of the unit that responded to a call from Coffee County late one night. They arrived on the scene and found a severely injured man lying at the edge of a field. His stomach had been completely torn open, and he was covered with lacerations and bruises. He also had a prominent tire tread across his chest. The injured man's companion showed up in a racing model ATV vehicle, clearly intoxicated, and gave the following account. Imagine this tale being recited in a deep Georgian accent. He and his injured friend had been drinkin' and ridin' around the field on the three-wheeled ATV, when they sighted a stand of deer in their headlights. The friend, riding the back as a passenger,was struck with a great idea. "Hey man," he said, "If you quarter off one a those deer, betcha I can bulldog 'im." The driver thought this was an entertaining idea, so he proceeded to isolate a buck and race him down. His intoxicated passenger proceeded to leap from the ATV, grab the buck by the antlers, and perform an excellent example of this rodeo sport. He pinned the animal's head to the ground, but that's when things went wrong. The buck, less docile than a steer, simply got up, threw his head back, and tore his assailant's belly open. The deer then proceeded to stomp, kick, and butt him for good measure. The EMTs noticed that this information accounted all of the injuries except one. When they asked the driver about the tire track across his injured friend's chest, he responded: "Well how else was I s'posed to git the deer off 'im?" ______________________________________________________ The closest to perfection anyone ever comes is when he or she fills out a job application form. ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Jim Hetrick for this picture: A picture of the "fall leaves in Ohio." Enjoy and again thanks for all. ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Kelsey Cousins, 20, Iowa
Drunk collegian calls 911, says she is "Olivia Pope" and then warns cop of car bomb heading for White House An Iowa collegian who is apparently a big fan of booze and TV’s “Scandal” called 911 early this morning claiming to be “Olivia Pope,” and reported a sighting of “Cyrus Beene” outside an Iowa City bar, police say. Cops responding to the 2:45 AM emergency call were flagged down by Kelsey Cousins, a 20-year-old University of Iowa student who is a member of the school’s rowing team. Officer Brad Reinhard reported that Cousins, seen above, “kept talking about ‘Olivia Pope’ and about a car with a bomb in it that was heading to the White House.” The cop added that, “‘Olivia Pope’ is a television show character and everything that defendant stated was nonsensical and rambling.” Actress Kerry Washington stars in “Scandal” as Pope, a Beltway fixer and presidential mistress. The “Cyrus Beene” character, played by Jeff Perry, is a scheming manipulator who was fired from his post as White House chief of staff. The underage Cousins, according to a police report, smelled of alcohol, suffered from impaired speech and balance, and had bloodshot, watery eyes. She reportedly copped to drinking and possessing a fake ID. Following her arrest for public intoxication, Cousins, seen above, took a Breathalyzer test that registered her blood alcohol content at .206, more than twice the legal limit. She is also facing a second misdemeanor charge for misuse of the 911 system.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Samantha Re: Clear Cache Dear Webby, Every time I have a problem getting to certain sites, that are up and working, because friends tell me they have no problem getting to them, the ISP's tech support tells me to clear the browser cache. When I was still using IE, I used to know how to do that, not that it ever made any difference, but I knew how to do that. Now, with Chrome I have no clue about how to clear the cache. Second question: Is there a way I can tell whether they are just full of BS and are just giving me the run-around while they go ask mom how to fix the fluck-up at the station? Samantha Dear Samantha On Chrome,click the three horizontal bars at the right top. That opens the menu. In there click HISTORY. In History, click CLEAR BROWSING DATA In the next panel click EMPTY CACHE You could set the time interval to Beginning of time, but that is silly, since if tehre had been a cache problem, it would be with a recently cached site. Re 2: yes, they are usually full of BS if they tell you to clear the cache. The easiest way to prove that is to bypass the browser and use tracert. Click on Start type cmd and hit enter. Let's assume you are trying to get to webby.com/humor On the scary black screen that opens, type tracert webby.com and hit Enter. Don't type any part after the actual domain name. After a few seconds you will see the route information appearing one line after another. Just getting to your ISP is usually the slowest. Eventually, the trace will wind up at the target domain. If you get there without any potholes (stars), then the route is clear. However, if there are potholes, or roadblocks (3 stars), then the route is obstructed, and the problem is NOT in your browser's cache, since you didn't even use your browser. To copy the trace route is a bit tricky, since it is in DOS format, unchanged from the 80's. Right-click on the top frame bar, select EDIT, and in there select MARK Then use the mouse to highlight the trace route, and hit ENTER Then you can go to your email and with CTRL V paste the trace route. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ The new Librarian decided that instead of checking out children's books by writing the names of borrowers on the book cards herself, she would have the youngsters sign their own names. She would then tell them they were signing a "Contract" for returning the books on time. Her first customer was a second grader, who looked surprised to see a new Librarian. He brought four books to the desk and shoved them across to the Librarian, giving her his name as he did so. The Librarian pushed the books back and told him to sign them out. The boy laboriously printed his name on each book card and then handed them to her with a look of utter disgust. Before the Librarian could even start her speech he said, scornfully, "That other Librarian we had knew how to write herself!" ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Paperclip as Collar Stay My son has to wear dress shirts to work and I launder them myself. He loses those little plastic collar stays all the time. He discovered a paperclip works like a charm! It's not quite as long but just as effective and easier to remove before washing. If this tip wins, I promise to give him the prize. He's saving for grad school. Source: My son's brilliant mind and necessity By Beth Pierpont H. [1] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ The temporary Sunday School teacher was struggling to open a combination lock on the supply cabinet. She had been told the combination, but couldn't quite remember it. Finally she went to the pastor's study and asked for help. The pastor came into the room and began to turn the dial. After the first two numbers he paused and stared blankly for a moment. Finally he look serenely heavenward and his lips moved silently. Then he looked back at the lock, and quickly turned to the final number, and opened the lock. The teacher was amazed. "I'm in awe at your faith, pastor," she said. "It's really nothing," he answered. "The number is on a piece of tape on the ceiling." ___________________________________________________

when neighbors complained about noise, this is what they found
____________________________________________________ Billy Bob and Bubba fly to Alaska for a fishing trip. They hire a bush pilot and rent a boat, rods, and tackle. After two weeks they have caught only one salmon. ''MAN Bubba," Billy Bob says, "Do you realize this lousy fish cost us about $15000 apiece." 'Wow," Bubba replies, 'At that rate it's a good thing we only caught one of them!" ____________________________________________________
Russian Dance Group Float across the Stage

Today, October 22, in
1825 The Erie Canal opened in upstate New York. The 363-mile 
 canal connected Lake Erie and the Hudson River at a cost of 
 $7,602,000. 
1858 H.E. Smith patented the rotary-motion washing machine. 
1881 The "Gunfight at the OK Corral" took place in Tombstone, 
 AZ. The fight was between Wyatt Earp, his two brothers and 
 Doc Holiday against the Ike Clanton Gang. 
1905 Norway gained independence from Sweden. 
1942 The U.S. ship Hornet was sunk in the Battle of Santa Cruz 
 during World War II. 
1944 During World War II, the Battle of Leyte Gulf ended. The 
 battle was won by American forces and brought the end of the 
 Pacific phase of World War II into sight. 
1949 U.S. President Harry Truman raised the minimum wage from 
 40 to 75 cents an hour. 
1951 Winston Churchill became the prime minister of Great Britain. 
1958 Pan American Airways flew its first Boeing 707 jetliner 
 from New York City to Paris. 
1962 The Soviet Union made an offer to end the Cuban Missile Crisis 
 by taking their missile bases out of Cuba if the U.S. agreed to 
 not invade Cuba and would remove Jupiter missiles in Turkey. 
1967 The Shah of Iran crowned himself and his Queen after 26 
 years on the Peacock Throne. 
1972 U.S. National security adviser Henry Kissinger declared, 
 "Peace is at hand" in Vietnam. 
1975 Anwar Sadat became the first Egyptian president to officially 
 visit to the United States. 
1977 The experimental space shuttle Enterprise successfully landed 
 at Edwards Air Force Base in California. 
1979 South Korean President Park Chung-hee was shot to death by 
 Kim Jae-kyu, the head of the Korean Central Intelligence Agency. 
1980 Israeli President Yitzhak Navon became the first Israeli head 
 of state to visit Egypt. 
1984 "Baby Fae" was given the heart of baboon after being born 
 with a severe heart defect. She lived for 21 days with the 
 animal heart. 
1985 Approximately 110,000 people marched past the U.S. and Soviet 
 embassies in London to pressure the two countries to end their 
 arms race. 
1988 Roussel Uclaf, a French pharmaceutical company, announced it 
 was halting the worldwide distribution of RU-486. The pill is 
 used to induce abortions. The French government made the company 
 reverse itself two days later. 
1988 Two whales were freed by Soviet and American icebreakers. The 
 whales had been trapped for nearly 3 weeks in an Arctic ice pack. 
1990 Wayne Gretzky became the first NHL player to reach 2,000 points. 
1991 Former Washington Mayor Marion Barry arrived at a federal 
 correctional institution in Petersburg, VA, to begin serving a 
 six-month sentence for cocaine possession. 
1992 General Motors Corp. Chairman Robert Stempel resigned after the 
 company recorded its highest losses in history. 
1992 In Canada, voters rejected the Charlottetown accord, which was 
 designed to unify the country. 
1993 Deborah Gore Dean was convicted of 12 felony counts of defrauding 
 the U.S. government and lying to the U.S. Congress. Dean was a central 
 figure in the Reagan-era HUD scandal. 
1994 Prime Minister Yitzhak Rabin of Israel and Prime Minister Abdel 
 Salam Majali of Jordan signed a peace treaty. 
1995 Mario Lemieux (Pittsburgh Penguins) scored his 500th National 
 Hockey League (NHL) career goal against the New York Islanders in his 
 605th game. He became the second-fastest player to attain the plateau. 
 Wayne Gretzky had reached 600 goals by his 575th NHL game. 
1998 A French lab found a nerve agent on an Iraqi missile warhead. 
2001 It was announced that Fort Worth's Lockheed Martin won a defense 
 contract for $200 billion over 40 years. The contract, for the 
 "joint strike fighter," was the largest defense contract in history. 
2002 Russian authorities pumped a gas into a theater where separatist 
 rebels held over 800 hostages. The gas killed 116 hostages and all 
 50 hostage-takers were killed by the gas or gunshot wounds.
2015  smiled.


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W8 script error on start-up 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Friday, October 23
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!


Today I have to go to Calgary for injections into my 
eyeballs. That means no Saturday, Sunday and Monday
newsletters will be sent out. 

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a SC teen arrested after his rape victim bit off his tongue. Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 21, in 1915 Approximately 25,000 women demanded the right to vote with a march in New York City, NY. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ I have long been of the opinion that if work were such a splendid thing the rich would have kept more of it for themselves. --- Bruce Grocott (1940 - ) "The only way to avoid being miserable is not to have enough leisure to wonder whether you are happy or not." --- George Bernard Shaw ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Customer: "I'd like an under the mouse mat, please." Salesperson: "Certainly sir, we've got a large variety, $1.95 each." Customer: "But will they be compatible with my computer?" Salesperson: "Hmmm, have you got one of those new Intels ?" Customer: "Yes, it says Intel inside, it's a 17"." Salesperson: "Then you better get one of these $29.95 mousepads" Customer: "But, is it Y2K approved ?" Salesperson: "Well,...to be on the safe side, maybe you should better get one of these bue ones for $49.95." ______________________________________________________ Bulletin Board Bloopers: The outreach committee has enlisted 25 visitors to make calls on people who are not afflicted with any church. --------------------------- The Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10am. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is done. --------------------------- The Rev. Merriwether spoke briefly, much to the delight of the audience. --------------------------- Due to the Rector's illness, Wednesday's healing services will be discontinued until further notice. --------------------------- The concert held in Fellowship Hall was a great success. Special thanks are due to the minister's daughter, who labored the whole evening at the piano, which as usual fell upon her. ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Noella for this picture: ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Antoine Tremane Miller, 16 North Charleston, South Carolina
SC teen arrested after his rape victim bit off his tongue -As she fought off a sexual assault from an intruder, a South Carolina woman bit off her 16-year-old attacker’s tongue, according to a police report detailing the harrowing home invasion. The 33-year-old victim told South Charleston cops that the knife-wielding teen forced his way into her residence early Friday morning. While grappling with the attacker, the victim was knocked to the floor and punched several times. She told investigators that the assailant declared, “Stop fighting and I won't hurt you.” The intruder then carried the woman to a bedroom and attempted to remove her shorts, police say. But the victim fought back and kicked the teen in the groin, which incensed him. "Now you have to die!" the assailant said, according to the report. As the attacker forcibly “shoved his tongue down in her mouth,” the woman “bit...as hard as she could until she heard it snap,” cops noted. The screaming assailant then fled the bedroom, recalled the victim, who told police that when she got off the bed, “the suspect’s tongue was still in her mouth and she threw it on the kitchen floor.” Upon arriving at the woman’s residence, police discovered blood in the bedroom, as well as the severed tongue (which was placed into a bag of ice). Cops also found a knife in the home’s yard. The victim, investigators noted, had a bruise around her right eye with swelling and scratches on her knee and foot. Shortly after the attack, the teenager was located at a nearby Waffle House. Cops were dispatched to the restaurant after the suspect’s mother called 911 to report her son “not having a tongue and needing medical assistance.” Police have identified the attacker as Antoine Tremane Miller, a North Charleston resident. The teenager, who has been charged as an adult, is jailed without bond on felony counts of criminal sexual conduct, assault, burglary, and weapons possession. Miller, seen in the above mug shot, was treated at a North Charleston hospital, but a police spokesperson declined to say whether the teen’s tongue--which police transported to the hospital--was reattached.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Walter Re: Unresponsive Script on W8 Hi Dear Webby, I appreciate your looking into whether you can find a cure for the bothersome "Unresponsive Script" window popping up continually on my 8.1 laptop. I gave the computer to the Geek Squad for a possible solution, If they find one I'll let you know. Be well, live long, and prosper, Walter Dear Walter I found this: A file called IEFrame.dll has registration problems. Every DLL file is registered in the system registry. The problem arises when IEFrame.dll file registration entries gets corrupted. In this case there is a manual way to resolve this issue. Unregister and reregister the file again as shown here: 1. Click the Start button. 2. Point to All Programs | Accessories. 3. Right click Command Prompt. 4. Select "Run as administrator". 5. Execute below commands- regsvr32 actxprxy.dll regsvr32 oleaut32.dll regsvr32 ole32.dll Regsvr32. Ieframe.dll 6. When you're done, type EXIT and press ENTER. If this does not fix your problem, the best way would be to use Quick-Fix Patch. It scans the whole system for problems related to DLL registration, missing file, and so on. It would take a minute or two to repair it automatically. UNinstalling IE would probably also take care of the problem. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ >From Joan in Minnesota. The Canadian Geese are back, a big event there. Next come the Winnebagos. ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Stuffed Peppers An easy fall dish that's healthy and delicious! Approximate Time: 90 minutes Yield: 2-3 servings, 6 pepper halves Ingredients: 3 bell peppers 1/2 cup brown rice 1 small onion, diced 1 cup crushed tomatoes 12 oz extra lean ground beef (I used 95%) 1 Tbsp minced garlic 1 Tbsp garlic salt 1 Tbsp olive oil 1/2 cup mozzarella cheese Steps: Slice the peppers in half length wise and scoop out seeds and pith. Rinse and set in a baking dish, cut side up. Saute' garlic and onion in olive oil for 5 minutes or until softened. Add in ground beef and cook until brown. Cook rice as directed. Add in tomatoes, garlic salt, and ground beef mixture in last 5 minutes of cooking. Bake peppers alone for 15 minutes at 350 F. Then spoon stuffing mixture evenly over peppers, returning to oven to bake for 30 minutes at 400 F. Add mozzarella cheese evenly over peppers. Broil for 5 minutes or until browned. Serve up with tomato sauce if desired. Link: www.triingforbalance.blogspot.com By Rae [1] That takes less skill but quite a bit more work than regular, old-fashioned stuffed peppers. For those, hollow out the peppers, and for the beef use regular ground beef. It is cheaper and has much more flavor. Murdering onions by just softening them would get you yelled at in my kitchen. Sautee them properly until they are hazelnut brown! Gently stir them while you do that, so that they don't get black edges. NO email-checking during the sauteeing! For the rice, DO NOT cook it as directed! That produces a silly mush after baking. If you nuke the rice, deduct a minute, and don't let it steep covered like you would if you use it as a side dish! Mix the rice and the rest of the ingredients except cheese and stuff it into the hollowed out peppers. That is why they are called stuffed peppers. when full, add the cheese and cap it with the original top after carving off the seed pith. Add a cup of slightly watered down pasta sauce, about 3/4 to 1 inch high in the casserole or crock pot. I drain the "spiced, crushed tomatoes" a bit and use that liquid to thin down the pasta sauce. Bake in the oven in a casserole at 350 for 25 minutes or in a crock pot for a few hours. THEN you get proper, old-fashioned STUFFED Peppers, that taste just like your gramma's stuffed peppers did. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ A number of children from the neighborhood were invited to Mrs. Johnson's for dinner. She decided to do something different while serving the meal. "Where are you originally from?" she asked one child. "California," said the boy. "Well then, I will give you the left wing." She turned to another boy and asked, "Where are YOU from?" "New York," he answered. And she said, "You get the right wing." She turned to the third boy and asked, "Where are you from?" He said, "I'm from New Orleans and I ain't hungry!" ___________________________________________________

when neighbors complained about noise, this is what they found
____________________________________________________ Linda and Jill are having coffee when Linda notices that Jill seems troubled and asks her, "Is something bugging you? You look anxious." "Well, my boyfriend just lost all his money and life savings in the stock market," Jill explained. "Oh, that's too bad," Linda sympathized. "I'm sure you're feeling sorry for him." "Yeah, I am," Jill said. "He'll miss me." ____________________________________________________
There’s an annual Straw Art Festival in Japan and it looks awesome!

Today, October 22, in
1910 - Blanche S. Scott became the first woman to make a 
 public solo airplane flight in the United States. 
1915 - Approximately 25,000 women demanded the right to 
 vote with a march in New York City, NY. 
1929 In the U.S., the Dow Jones Industrial Average plunged 
 starting the stock-market crash that began the Great Depression. 
1942 During World War II, the British began a major offensive 
 against Axis forces at El Alamein, Egypt. 
1944 During World War II, the Battle of Leyte Gulf began. 
1956 Hungarian citizens began an uprising against Soviet 
 occupation. On November 4, 1956 Soviet forces enter Hungary 
 and eventually suppress the uprising. 
1958 Russian poet and novelist Boris Pasternak was awarded the 
 Nobel Prize for literature. He was forced to refuse the honor 
 due to negative Soviet reaction. Pasternak won the award for 
 writing "Dr. Zhivago". 
1962 During the Cuban Missile Crisis, the U.S. naval "quarantine" 
 of Cuba was approved by the Council of the Organization of 
 American States (OAS). 
1962 The U.S. Navy reconnaissance squadron VFP-62 began 
 overflights of Cuba under the code name "Blue Moon." 
1971 The U.N. General Assembly voted to expel Taiwan and seat 
 Communist China. 
1973 U.S. President Richard M. Nixon agreed to turn over the 
 subpoenaed tapes concerning the Watergate affair. 
1978 China and Japan formally ended four decades of hostility 
 when they exchanged treaty ratifications. 
1980 The resignation of Soviet Premier Alexei N. Kosygin 
 was announced. 
1984 "NBC Nightly News" aired footage of the severe drought 
 in Ethiopia. 
1989 Hungary became an independent republic, after 33 years of 
 Soviet rule. 
1992 Japanese Emperor Akihito became the first Japanese emperor 
 to stand on Chinese soil. 
1995 Russian President Boris Yeltsin and U.S. President Bill 
 Clinton agree to a joint peacekeeping effort in the war-torn Bosnia. 
1998 Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu and Palestinian 
 Chairman Yasser Arafat reach a breakthrough in a land-for-peace 
 West Bank accord. 
1998 Japan nationalized its first bank since World War II. 
2001 NASA's Mars Odyssey spacecraft began orbiting Mars. In 2010, 
 it became the longest-operating spacecraft ever sent to Mars. 
2015  smiled.


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W8 Script Error Failure 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Thursday, October 22

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Florida couple arrested after they left name and phone number in gallery guestbook before robbery Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 21, in 1797 Andre-Jacques Garnerin made the first recorded parachute jump. He made the jump from about 3,000 feet. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ Ours is the age that is proud of machines that think and suspicious of men who try to. --- H. Mumford Jones (1892 - 1980) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ >From Jean Four old men went into the pro shop after playing 18 holes of golf. The pro asked, "Did you guys have a good game today?" The first old guy said, "Yes, I had three riders today." The second old guy said, "I had the most riders ever. I had five." The third old guy said, "I had seven riders, the same as last time." The last old man said, "I beat my old record. I had 12 riders today." After they went into the locker room, another golfer who had heard the old guys talking about their game went to the pro and said, "I've been playing golf for a long time and thought I knew all the terminology of the game, but what's a rider?" The pro said, "A rider is when you hit the ball far enough to actually get in the golf cart and ride to it." ______________________________________________________ Recently in Traffic Court, a man who received an expensive parking ticket testified that a uniformed Policeman had given his OK for the man to park there. The Judge asked the man if he would recognize the Officer if he ever saw him again, and the man replied that he would. The Judge then said, "Good. When you see the Officer again, tell him he owes you 57 dollars. Next..." ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Megan Ohara, 24 David Ziskowski, 19 Palm Beach, Florida
Florida couple arrested after they left name and phone number in gallery guestbook before robbery Authorities say a man and woman left the woman's name and telephone number in the guestbook of a South Florida art gallery before stealing about $6,000 worth of jewelry. Palm Beach police say 24-year-old Megan Ohara and 19-year-old David Ziskowski took a bracelet and a ring Sunday from the Attila JK exhibition at the ICFA Gallery. They were spotted a short time later at a nearby grocery, and police reported finding the jewelry in the woman's purse. Officers found multiple fake email addresses and at least one obscene drawing in the gallery's guestbook. The South Florida Sun Sentinel (http://goo.gl/UEPiqq ) reports that two of the fake emails included the name "Meg" and one included Ohara's phone number. Ohara and Ziskowski were arrested and charged with grand theft.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Walter Re: Unresponsive Script on W8 Hi Dear Webby, I once again seek the help of the western hemisphere's preeminent cyber guru. Quite frequently on my 8.1 Windows laptop, Firefox browser, a window comes up, saying "Warning: Unresponsive Script." The screen then freezes and to correct this problem I have to reboot. Have you an answer on how to prevent this from happening? Be well, live long, and prosper, Walter Dear Walter "Just a routine Windows 8 F...up". Hit CTRL SHIFT ESC to open the Taskmanager sort by Memory locate and highlight FireFox Hit END PROCESS in the right bottom corner. It will close FireFox and unlock W8. Chrome seems to be able to deal with that problem more intelligently and lets you stop and restart unresponsive scripts. Unfortunately, that only gets you over a symptom of the problem, and does not cure it. I will look for a possible cure. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ An old farmer wrote to a giant mail order company and asked for the price of their toilet paper. The company wrote back telling him to look on page #346 of their catalog. He wrote another letter to the company that said: "If you had not stopped sending me catalogs, I would not need any toilet paper." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Keep Your Pumpkin from Spoiling It is Jack-o-Lantern time! I always wait until the last minute to carve my pumpkin because it seems like it starts to rot the next day. I saw a special on TV where they immerse the cut pumpkin in a solution of water and bleach. You keep it in for a while and make sure it gets submerged and every cut surface is treated. Let it drain for a while. Just make sure you wear old clothes and use plastic gloves. I think Rubbermaid would be the best. I don't know the percentage of bleach to water, or how long to keep in the liquid. Before I have tried using salt and water or vinegar but the pumps didn't last any longer. Source: TV special Extreme Hallowe'en I think it was By Nightsong [37] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ As the storm raged, the captain realized his ship was sinking fast. He called out, "Anyone here know how to pray?" One man stepped forward, "Aye, Captain, I know how to pray." "Good," said the captain, "you pray while the rest of us put on our life jackets - we're one short." ___________________________________________________

July 31, 2015 moonrise over Cape Byron Lighthouse, on Belongil Beach, Byron Bay, New South Wales, Australia. The head land and lighthouse at Byron Bay is the most easterly point of the Australian Mainland and therefor is the first place in Australia to watch the full moon rise. This video is made up of 1038 frames and slowed down to as close to real time as possible.
____________________________________________________ When I consider how sweaters tend to make me sweat, I'm a lot less inclined to wear my windbreaker. ____________________________________________________
Body paint for Halloween

Today, October 22, in
1746 The College of New Jersey was officially chartered. It 
 later became known as Princeton University. 
1797 Andre-Jacques Garnerin made the first recorded parachute 
 jump. He made the jump from about 3,000 feet. 
1836 Sam Houston was inaugurated as the first constitutionally 
 elected president of the Republic of Texas. 
1844 This day is recognized as "The Great Disappointment" 
 among those who practiced Millerism. The world was expected to 
 come to an end according to the followers of William Miller. 
1879 Thomas Edison conducted his first successful experiment 
 with a high-resistance carbon filament. 
1907 The Panic of 1907 began when depositors began withdrawing 
 money from many New York banks. 
1954 The Federal Republic of Germany was invited to join the 
 North Atlantic Treaty Organization (NATO). 
1962 U.S. President Kennedy went on radio and television to 
 inform the United States about his order to send U.S. forces 
 to blockade Cuba. The blockade was in response to the 
 discovery of Soviet missile bases on the island. 
1968 Apollo 7 splashed down in the Atlantic Ocean. The spacecraft 
 had orbited the Earth 163 times. 
1975 Air Force Technical Sergeant Leonard Matlovich was discharged 
 after publicly declaring his homosexuality. His tombstone reads 
 "A gay Vietnam Veteran. When I was in the military they gave 
 me a medal for killing two men and a discharge for loving one." 
1979 The ousted Shah of Iran, Mohammad Riza Pahlavi was allowed 
 into the U.S. for medical treatment. 
1981 The Professional Air Traffic Controllers Organization was 
 decertified by the federal government for its strike the previous August. 
1991 The European Community and the European Free Trade Association 
 agreed to create a free trade zone of 19 nations by the year 1993. 
1999 China ended its first-ever human rights conference in which it 
 defied Western definitions of civil liberties. 
1999 The U.N. Security Council voted to send 6,000 troops to 
Sierra Leone to oversee a peace plan that had been signed in July. 
2008 The iTunes Music Store reached 200 million applications downloaded. 
2010 The Internation Space Station set the record (3641 days) for the 
 longest continuous human occupation of space. It had been continously 
 inhabited since November 2, 2000. 
2015  smiled.


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Restore desktop 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Wednesday, October 21

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Women arrested for DUI, who told tells police her name is 'Hell On Wheels' Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 21, in 1918 Margaret Owen set a typing speed record of 170 words per minute on a manual typewriter. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot. --- Steven Wright (1955 - ) "Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot." --- Charlie Chaplin Historians are like deaf people who go on answering questions that no one has asked them. --- Leo Tolstoy (1828 - 1910) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ A salesman from New York traveling in Kansas left his snazzy rental car out in a hail storm. When the storm was over he checked the car and found out it was covered with small dents. He went to the local garage and inquired how he could fix the problem himself. The mechanic told him to blow on the tailpipe and the dents would pop out again. He took the car to the motel where he was staying, parked it and proceeded to blow on the tailpipe. A local came by and inquired what he was doing. He explained that he was blowing on the tailpipe to remove the dents. The local responded, "That's not gonna to work, not unless you roll up the windows real tight first." ______________________________________________________ Little Johnny was in his math class one day when the teacher singled him out. "If I gave you $200," the teacher began, "and you gave $50 to Mary, $50 to Sally and $50 to Susan, what would you have?" "Well, it sure would be no orgy!" Johnny answered, "Helen, my girlfriend, would bust my skull for that!" ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Amanda Dolores Alleman 38, CLARKSBURG, Wesrt Virginia
Women arrested for DUI, who told tells police her name is 'Hell On Wheels' Police say a woman accused of drunken driving and hitting six vehicles initially identified herself to an officer as "Hell on Wheels." The Exponent Telegram (http://bit.ly/1KdL6cI ) reports 38-year-old Amanda Dolores Alleman of Clarksburg was arrested Friday on numerous charges. Among them are aggravated driving while under the influence, striking an unattended vehicle and having no insurance. Police say Alleman had a blood-alcohol content of 0.20 percent when she struck six parked vehicles on two different streets. Alleman was being held at the North Central Regional Jail on $14,000 bond.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Bonnie Re: Desktop restore Dear Webby For that poor lady whose desktop icons all got scrambled - we only have a couple dozen so what I did was do a "print screen" of the desktop & saved it in an e-mail draft.Ā Now when they go haywire I just use that to reassemble them.Ā Sounds a lot easier, hope you will print my idea. Bonnie in Candia Dear Bonnie You are an exception! Most people have a LOT of icons on their desktop. If somebody finds the half minute installation of Desktop OK too much hassle, there ARE ways to reduce the number of icons. Make some desktop folders, for example Tools, Music, Recipes and so on. Then drag all related icons into those folders. That will reduce the number of loose icons very quickly. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into the den. "What is the big brass gong and shovel for?" one of his friends asked. "That is the talking clock", the man replied. "How's it work?" the friend asked. "Watch", the man said then proceeded to give the gong an ear shattering whack with the shovel. Suddenly someone screamed from the other side of the wall: "KNOCK IT OFF, YOU IDIOT! It's two fourty five in the morning!" ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Hydrogen Peroxide and Baking Soda Deodorant I have been keeping a bowl and mixing hydrogen peroxide and baking soda and using it as deodorant. I have never been fresher. Mix a small amount into a paste. I buy the value size on both at Sam's Club. I am at seven months and might get a year out if it. I used to use a deodorant costing 5.99 every two weeks. By Stevebasso [1] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Father to son after exam: "Let me see your report card." Son: "Bobby just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents." ___________________________________________________

What does Google look like
____________________________________________________ had been misbehaving and was sent to bed. After a while emerged and informed mother that had thought it over and then said a prayer. "Fine", said the pleased mother. "If you ask God to help you about your misbehaving, He will help you." "Oh, I don't need help with misbehavin' ", said . "I asked Him to help me not to get caught quite so much." ____________________________________________________
A massive bridge building machine. Those are some brave men that work around that machine.

Today, October 21, in
1797 "Old Ironsides," the U.S. Navy frigate Constitution, 
 was launched in Boston's harbor. 
1805 The Battle of Trafalgar occurred off the coast of Spain. 
 The British defeated the French and Spanish fleet. 
1858 The Can-Can was performed for the first time in Paris. 
1879 Thomas Edison invented the electric incandescent lamp. 
 It would last 13 1/2 hours before it would burn out. 
1917 The first U.S. soldiers entered combat during WWI 
 near Nancy, France. 
1918 Margaret Owen set a typing speed record of 170 words 
 per minute on a manual typewriter. 
1925 The photoelectric cell was first demonstrated at the 
 Electric Show in New York City, NY. 
1925 The U.S. Treasury Department announced that it had fined 
 29,620 people for prohibition (of alcohol) violations. 
1944 During World War II, the German city of Aachen was 
 captured by U.S. troops. 
1945 Women in France were allowed to vote for the first time. 
1950 Chinese forces invaded Tibet. 
1959 The Guggenheim Museum was opened to the public in New York. 
 The building was designed by Frank Lloyd Wright. 
1967 Thousands of demonstrators marched in Washington, DC, in 
 opposition to the Vietnam War. 
1983 The Pentagon reported that 2,000 Marines were headed to 
 Grenada to protect and evacuate Americans living there. 
1986 The U.S. ordered 55 Soviet diplomats to leave. The action 
 was in reaction to the Soviet Union expelling five American diplomats. 
1991 Jesse Turner, an American hostage in Lebanon, was released 
 after nearly five years of being imprisoned. 
1994 North Korea and the U.S. signed an agreement requiring North 
 Korea to halt its nuclear program and agree to inspections. 
2003 The U.S. Senate voted to ban what was known as partial 
 birth abortions. 
2003 North Korea rejected U.S. President George W. Bush's offer 
 of a written pledge not to attack in exchange for the communist 
 nation agreeing to end its nuclear weapons program.
2015  smiled.


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Desktop is messed up again 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Tuesday, October 20


Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Florida couple, who prolonged police standoff to have sex 'one last time'. Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 20, in 1740 Maria Theresa became the ruler of Austria, Hungary and Bohemia with the death of her father, Holy Roman Emperor Charles VI. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty. --- Sacha Guitry (1885 - 1957) Only two of my personalities are schizophrenic, but one of them is paranoid and the other one is out to get her. --- Hillary "Modern art is what happens when painters stop looking at girls and persuade themselves they have a better idea." --- John Ciardi "Modern Art" ? Isn't that an oxymoron like "Dry Water", which, according to people in the military is like "Military Intelligence" ? "What would men be without women? Scarce, sir, mighty scarce." --- Mark Twain ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Mother: "How's your history paper coming?" Son: "Well, my history professor suggested that I use the Internet for research and it's been very helpful." Mother: "Really?" Son: "Yes, so far I've located 17 people who sell history papers on that topic!" ______________________________________________________ A lady was sitting in a fine restaurant one night. While she was waiting for her date, she wanted to make sure everything was perfect. So, as she bends down in her chair to get the mirror from her purse, she accidentally farts quite loudly just as the waiter walks up. Sitting up straight now, embarrassed and red faced, knowing everyone in the place heard her, she turns to the waiter and demands "Stop That!" The waiter looks at her dryly and says "Sure lady, which way did you fire it ?" ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Ryan Patrick Bautista, 34, Leanne Hunn, 30, , Jacksonville, Florida
Couple Prolongs Police Standoff To Have Sex 'One Last Time' Ryan Patrick Bautista, 34, and Leanne Hunn, 30, allegedly refused to surrender to police until they could have sex together one last time. A standoff began Wednesday night when Jacksonville Sheriffs responded to a call about Michael Forte, 34, who was wanted on several warrants including armed burglary, FirstCoastNews.com reports. A Jacksonville Sheriffs Office spokeswoman said deputies were also looking for Bautista, who also had several warrants, including armed burglary. Bautista and Hunn reacted to the police visit by barricading themselves inside a mobile home and refusing to leave for more than six hours, according to News4Jax.com. Three other adults were inside the home at the time police arrived, but one woman was allowed to leave a short time later. Police said Hunn and Bautista detained another woman by dragging her to a back bedroom where she was held down, according to the website. That woman was eventually allowed to leave, but Hunn and Bautista refused to exit the mobile home. Hostage negotiators were called to the scene and attempted to communicate with the couple via phone and bullhorns, according to Jacksonville.com. At some point during the standoff, Hunn told police she would give herself up but not until she had sex with Bautista “one last time,” according to the website. Hunn never did come out on her own. Eventually, officers broke into the mobile home and arrested the couple. Bautista and Hunn were arrested and charged with resisting police and false imprisonment, according to CBS News. They are currently in the Duval County Jail. The couple apparently had an audience for their "last time" lovemaking session. Turns out Forte, the subject of the original phone tip, was also in the mobile home. Forte was arrested and charged with possession of a weapon by a convicted felon, armed robbery, and murder, according to Inside Edition. Forte is currently being held in the Duval County jail on charges of murder, armed robbery with a firearm or other deadly weapon and possession of a weapon by a felon, according to jail records.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Annalisa Re: Desktop messed up Dear Webby Windoze has done it AGAIN. Totally screwed up my perfectly organized desktop and just moved all icons in one disorganized pile on the left side, while I was not even near the computer. When I saw that, this prim and proper lady used some VERY foul language! What have you got to keep me from cussing like that? Annalisa Dear Annalisa I got an add-on that installed itself into the right-click menu for saving or restoring the desktop. Unfortunately, I got that probably half a dozen years ago and have long forgotten where I got it from. Try right-clicking the desktop and see if you have that add-on. In case you don't have that, I searched for an alternative. I tested it, and it is clean and works well. Go to Desktop OK and Download the program at Desktop OK Program You have to unzip it and then run it. Don't get flustered by the many options in it! Just look at the Auto-Save, tell it to save 32 back-ups, and to save when Windows shuts down. Saving every 15 minutes is available, but in my opinion not a good idea. That could possibly save right after Windows messes up your desktop. If you have time and inclination, you can play with the ton of options in there, but it works fine as is. If it looks like it disappeared, click the double upwards arrows in the right bottom, beside the W10 nagger. That shows you programs, that are running in the background. One of them is a white mini desktop with some colored dots in it. That's Desktop OK. If you want to restore the desktop, you can select which saved version you want. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ A preacher wanted to mail a letter home when he arrived in this small town where he was to to preach a sermon. He asked a young boy where the post office was. When the boy told him, he thanked him and said, "If you'll come to the Baptist church this evening, you can hear me telling everyone how to get to Heaven." "Huh! the boy huffed, "You don't even know your way to the post office." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Use Shower Curtain Rings as Hangers Each time you buy a new shower curtain it comes with a new set of curtain rings which are not always needed. You can use these in your wardrobe to save space by hooking them onto a clothes hanger. You can then hang vests, ties belts and scarves from the rings By ShirleyE [26] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ A kid walked up to a guy wearing a 10-gallon hat, leather vest, leather chaps, and sneakers. The kid asked him, "Mr. Cowboy, why do you wear that big hat?" The cowboy replied, "Well, son, the big hat protects me from hot sun and driving rain, and at night I put it over my face when I sleep on the range, so it protects me then, too." "Why do you wear that leather vest?" "It also helps to keep the weather off me, and it has pockets where I can keep my cigarettes and matches." "Well, why do you wear leather chaps?" "They protect my legs when I'm riding my horse through rough bushes." "Well, Mr. Cowboy," the kid finally asked, "Why do you wear sneakers instead of cowboy boots ?" "That's so people won't think I'm a truck driver." ___________________________________________________

refueling in air
____________________________________________________ This one is a classic, but good enough to see again: The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the computers. He dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whispered, "Hello?" Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to a youngster the boss asked, "Is your Daddy home?" "Yes", whispered the small voice. "May I talk with him?" the man asked. To the surprise of the boss, the small voice whispered, "No." Wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?" "Yes", "May I talk with her?" Again the small voice whispered, "No". Knowing that it was not likely that a young child would be left home alone, the boss decided he would just leave a message with the person who should be there watching over the child. "Is there any one there besides you?" the boss asked the child. "Yes" whispered the child, "A policeman". Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked "May I speak with the policeman"? "No, he's busy", whispered the child. "Busy doing what?, asked the boss. "Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman", came the whispered answer. Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the ear piece on the phone the boss asked, "What is that noise?" "A hello-copper", answered the whispering voice. "What is going on there?", asked the boss, now alarmed. In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper in the sandbox!" Alarmed, concerned and more than just a little frustrated the boss asked, "Why are they there"? Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle: "They're looking for me." ____________________________________________________
Large-scale land art by Stan Herd, known as the "Father of Crop Art."

Today, October 20, in
1740 Maria Theresa became the ruler of Austria, Hungary and 
 Bohemia with the death of her father, Holy Roman Emperor 
 Charles VI. 
1774 The new Continental Congress, the governing body of America’s 
 colonies, passed an order proclaiming that all citizens of the 
 colonies "discountenance and discourage all horse racing and 
 all kinds of gaming, cock fighting, exhibitions of shows, plays 
 and other expensive diversions and entertainment." 
1803 The U.S. Senate approved the Louisiana Purchase. 
1818 The U.S. and Great Britain established the boundary between 
 the U.S. and Canada to be the 49th parallel. 
1827 The Battle of Navarino took place during the Greek War for 
 Independence. 
1873 A Hippodrome was opened in New York City by showman Phineus 
 T. (P.T.) Barnum. 
1903 A joint commission ruled in favor of the U.S. concerning a 
' dispute over the boundary between Canada and the District of 
 Alaska. 
1910 A baseball with a cork center was used in a World Series 
 game for the first time. 
1935 Mao Zedong arrived in Hanoi after his Long March that 
 took just over a year. He then set up the Chinese Communist 
 Headquarters. 
1942 Pierre Laval told the French labor that they must serve 
 in Germany. 
1944 Allied forces invaded the Philippines. 
1944 During World War II, the Yugoslav cities of Belgrade and 
 Dubrovnik were liberated. 
1947 Hollywood came under scrutiny as the House Un-American 
 Activities Committee opened hearings into alleged Communist 
 influence within the motion picture industry. 
1952 The Mau Mau uprising against white settlers began in Kenya. 
1968 Jackie Lee Bouvier Kennedy married Aristotle Onassis. 
1979 The John F. Kennedy Library in Boston was dedicated. 
1993 Attorney General Janet Reno warned the TV industry to limit 
 the violence in their programs. 
1994 The website WhiteHouse.gov was launched. 
1995 Britain, France and the U.S. announced a treaty that banned 
 atomic blasts in the South Pacific. 
2003 A 40-year-old man went over Niagara Falls without safety 
 devices and survived. He was charged with illegally performing 
 a stunt. 
2009 European astronomers discover 32 exoplanets.
2015  smiled.


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Chrome Bookmarks 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Monday, October 19

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Knife-wielding punk, who burst into library to kill kids. A 75-year-old army vet took him down. Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 19, in 1781 British General Charles Lord Cornwallis surrendered to U.S. General George Washington at Yorktown, Virginia. It was to be the last major battle of the American Revolutionary War. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other. --- Ann Landers (1918 - 2002) Take rest; a field that has rested gives a bountiful crop. --- Ovid (43 BC - 17 AD) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ A young boy came to Sunday School late. His teacher knew that he was usually very prompt and asked him if anything was wrong. The boy replied no, that he was going fishing but his dad told him that he needed to go to church. The teacher was very impressed and asked the boy if his dad had explained to him why it was more important to go to church than to go fishing. The boy replied: "Yes he did. Dad said he didn't have enough bait for both of us." ______________________________________________________ A little boy got lost at the YWCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter haven't you ever seen a little boy before?" ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Ross for this picture: ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD AND a Darwin Award has been earned by Dustin Brown, 19, Morton, Illinois
Knife-wielding punk bursts into library to kill kids. A 75-year-old army vet took him down. James Vernon, a 75-year-old veteran, took matters into his own hands when he found himself face-to-face with a man who was determined to shed some blood. Vernon and 16 parents and children were in a conference room at the Morton Public Library Tuesday when Dustin Brown, 19, entered and declared he was going to kill some people, according to the Pekin (Illinois) Daily Times. Brown had more than one knife and Vernon knew he had to do something fast to prevent a tragedy from happening. The elderly vet stepped in between Brown and the others, giving them a cue to leave the room. Vernon then relied on his knife training from 50 years ago to help him handle Brown. “He actually ran into the room yelling, ‘I’m going to kill some people!’ Vernon said. Vernon said the knives Brown had looked like hunting knives with fixed blades about five inches long. “I tried to talk to him. I tried to settle him down,” Vernon said. “I asked him if he was from Morton, did he go to high school. I asked what his problem was. He said his life sucks. That’s a quote.” While talking to Brown, Vernon noticed he was right-handed and expected he would strike with that hand first. Vernon knew to block with his left hand. Vernon was successful in stopping Brown from killing anyone but he didn’t walk away without an injury. Brown slashed two arteries and a tendon on Vernon’s left hand as he blocked Brown’s knife. Despite the injury, Vernon took down and subdued Brown until the police arrived. Brown was held on $800,000 bond on charges of attempted murder, armed violence, aggravated battery to a person over 60 and burglary. Brown had been free on bond facing child pornography charges.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Leona Re: How do I organize Chrome bookmarks? Dear Webby I want to organize my Chrome Bookmarks, and save them to a camera chip. How do I do that? Leona Dear Leona In the upper right corner of the browser toolbar, click the Chrome menu (The three horizontal bars). Click Bookmarks > Bookmark Manager. Browse to the folder where you want to alphabetize your bookmarks. Above your bookmarks, click Organize. Click Reorder by Title. Now when you open the Chrome menu and click Bookmarks, you’ll see your bookmarks listed in alphabetical order. To create a bookmark folder In the upper right corner of the browser toolbar, click the Chrome menu. Click Bookmarks > Bookmark Manager. On the left side of the page, click the Folders drop-down arrow. Click Add Folder, then name your folder. Drag any bookmarks into your folder. Shift-click to pick more than one item. To Export bookmarks, open the Bookmarks manager as above. Select a folder on the left Clik on Organize on top At the bottom of that you see: Export bookmarks. That exports the selected folder, for example your Prayers folder, but not your hubby's warm-up bookmarks folder. Just export the folders you want, and ignore the rest. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ "A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is, the more it stinkts." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Removing Bacon in One Piece I don't know how many times I've tried different ways to get one piece of bacon out of the package and into the pan flat, not ripped not torn but flat. Work a fork under one side or the other of the bottom piece of bacon in the package, you then begin to roll the fork into the direction of the other end of the piece of bacon. Effectively, you are rolling up a piece of bacon onto the fork. When you put it in the pan, you place edge side down. Unroll it into the pan off the fork. By Deborah S. [12] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ The mother of three notoriously unruly youngsters was asked whether or not she'd have children if she had it to do over again. "Sure," she replied, "but definitely not the same ones." ___________________________________________________

KFC Star Trek
____________________________________________________ Two Yuppettes were shopping. When they started to discuss their home lives, one said, "Seems like all Alfred and I do anymore is fight. I've been so upset, I've lost 20 pounds." "Why don't you just leave him then?" asked her friend. "Oh, No! I can't." the first replied, "I need to lose at least another fifteen pounds first." ____________________________________________________
What a marvelous idea. A preschool housed inside a retirement home.

Today, October 19, in
1765 In the U.S., The Stamp Act Congress met and drew up a 
 declaration of rights and liberties. 
1781 British General Charles Lord Cornwallis surrendered to 
 U.S. General George Washington at Yorktown, Virginia. It 
 was to be the last major battle of the American 
 Revolutionary War. 
1812 Napoleon Bonaparte's French forces began their return 
 out of Russia after a month of chasing the retreating 
 Russian army. 
1914 In the U.S., government owned vehicles were first used 
 to pick up mail in Washington, DC. 
1915 The U.S. recognized General Venustiano Carranza as the 
 president of Mexico. The U.S. imposed embargo to all parts 
 of Mexico except where Carranza was in control. 
1933 Basketball was introduced to the 1936 Olympic Games by 
 the Berlin Organization Committee. 
1944 The U.S. Navy announced that black women would be allowed 
 into Women Accepted for Volunteer Emergency Service (WAVES). 
1950 The United Nations forces entered the North Korean capital 
 of Pyongyang. 
1951 U.S. President Truman signed an act officially ending the 
 state of war with Germany. 
1960 The United States imposed an embargo on exports to Cuba 
 covering all commodities except medical supplies and certain 
 food products. 
1969 U.S. Vice President Spiro Agnew referred to anti-Vietnam 
 War protesters "an effete corps of impudent snobs." 
1977 The Concorde made its first landing in New York City. 
1989 The U.S. Senate rejected a proposed constitutional amendment 
 that barred the desecration of the American flag. 
1993 Benazir Bhutto was returned to the premiership of Pakistan. 
1998 Former heavyweight champion Mike Tyson got his boxing license 
 back after he had lost it for biting Evander Holyfield's ear 
 during a fight. 
2003 In London, magician David Blaine emerged from a clear 
 plastic box that had been suspended by a crane over the banks of 
 the Thames River. He survived only on water for 44 days. Blaine 
 had entered the box on September 5. 
2009 The international version of Amazon's Kindle 2 was released. 
2015  smiled.


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Organize bookmarks on Chrome 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Sunday, October 18

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Armed robber in Charleston Waffle House, who was shot and killed by a customer. Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 18, in 1469 - Ferdinand of Aragon married Isabella of Castile. The marriage united all the dominions of Spain. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ The great god Ra whose shrine once covered acres Is filler now for crossword-puzzle makers. --- Keith Preston All generalizations are dangerous, even this one. --- Alexandre Dumas (1802 - 1870) "Always listen to the experts. They'll tell you what can'tbe done and why. Then do it." --- Robert Heinlein (1907-1988) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ TEACHER: How old were you on your last birthday? STUDENT: Seven. TEACHER: How old will you be on your next birthday? STUDENT: Nine. TEACHER: That's impossible. STUDENT: No, it ain't, Teacher. I'm eight today. ______________________________________________________ TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America. GEORGE: Here it is! TEACHER: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America? CLASS: George! ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Noella for this picture: ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD AND a Darwin Award has been earned by Joshua Jermaine Davis, 19 Charleston, S.C.
Armed robber in Charleston Waffle House was shot and killed. A customer at a Waffle House in Charleston, S.C. opened fire on a would-be robber and killed him early Saturday morning —and will not be charged for the shooting, police said. “No one was hurt, which is the best part,” Waffle House division manager Brandon Rogers told the Post and Courier. “No one was injured — besides the robber.” A Waffle House employee told the paper: “He saved us.” The robber, 19-year-old Joshua Jermaine Davis, entered the restaurant shortly after 5 a.m., police said. By the time officers arrived, he had been shot. He died later in hospital, WCSC reported. Davis' Facebook page has several pictures of him posing with a handgun. Four days before the shooting, he posted a picture of what appears to be a police car and wrote, "We see Ya n----." The unidentified man who shot Davis had a permit to carry his pistol, police said. As the Waffle House manager noted, no one was injured in the shooting except Davis. The restaurant manager said Davis did not get away with anything, and the restaurant saw only minor damage from broken glass. The store was open as usual on Sunday, with an employee telling the Daily News the staff is moving on “as best we can.”
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Leona Re: How do I organize Chrome bookmarks? Dear Webby I want to organize my Chrome Bookmarks, and save them to a camera chip. How do I do that? Leona Dear Leona In the upper right corner of the browser toolbar, click the Chrome menu (The three horizontal bars). Click Bookmarks > Bookmark Manager. Browse to the folder where you want to alphabetize your bookmarks. Above your bookmarks, click Organize. Click Reorder by Title. Now when you open the Chrome menu and click Bookmarks, you’ll see your bookmarks listed in alphabetical order. To create a bookmark folder In the upper right corner of the browser toolbar, click the Chrome menu. Click Bookmarks > Bookmark Manager. On the left side of the page, click the Folders drop-down arrow. Click Add Folder, then name your folder. Drag any bookmarks into your folder. Shift-click to pick more than one item. To Export bookmarks, open the Bookmarks manager as above. Select a folder on the left Clik on Organize on top At the bottom of that you see: Export bookmarks. That exports the selected folder, for example your Prayers folder, but not your hubby's warm-up bookmarks folder. Just export the folders you want, and ignore the rest. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ A mother was telling her little girl what her own childhood was like. "We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries in the woods." The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this in. At last she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!" ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Organizing your Web Page Favorites I recently lost my laptop to a virus (be careful clicking on those cute videos) and it was more costly to recover than to purchase a new one. Fortunately, they were able to save my data. I had a bad habit of saving to "favorites" without catergorizing. Then when I wanted an article, I had to search the whole list to find it. When I set up my new computer, I made folders in "favorites". When I save items I want to review later, I put them immediately in their proper folder such as; crafts, crochet projects, recipes, menus, etc. No need to search the whole list now, just go to the particular folder you want. It is so much easier to use, faster and keeps things where you can find them. By HerkDia [32] I hope she learned her lesson and got McAfee and MalwareeBytes for the new machine. They would have been able to prevent the infection, and save the cost of a new machine. I am amzed at how many people rely on the Easter Bunny or good luck to shield them from malware. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ A drunk walks into a bar and says to the bartender (with a drunken slur), "Tarbender, buy everyone in the houshe a drink, pour yourschelf one, and gimme the bill." So the bartender does just that and hands the man a bill for $57. The drunk says, "I haven't got it." The bartender slaps the guy around a few times, then throws him out into the street. The very next day the same drunk walks into the bar and once again says (with a drunken slur), "Tarbender, buy everyone in the houshe a drink, pour yourschelf one, and gimme the bill." The bartender looks at the guy and figures to himself that he can't possibly be stupid enough to pull the same trick twice. So he gives him the benefit of the doubt, pours a round of drinks for the house, has a drink himself and hands the drunk a bill for $67. The drunk says, "I haven't got it." The bartender can't believe it. He picks the guy up, beats the living daylights out of him, then throws him out into the street. The next day the same drunk walks back into the same bar and says (with a drunken slur), "Tarbender, buy everyone in the houshe a drink, gimme the bill." In disgust, the bartender says, "What, no drink for me this time?" The drunk replies, "You? No way! You get too violent when you drink." ___________________________________________________

Young girl on Vietnamese stringed instrument
____________________________________________________ A little dwarf lady goes into her doctor's office complaining of an irritated crotch. After an examination the doctor sighs, "I don't seem to see any problem. Does it get better or worse at any time?" "Yeah, it's really bad whenever it rains," she replies. "Well, then," says the Doc, "Next time it rains, get in here at once, and we'll take another look at it." Two weeks later its raining really hard, and the little lady shows up at the doctor's office. "Doctor, it's really bad today. Please, you have to help me!!" "Well, let's have a look," he says as he lifts her up onto the table. "Oh, yes, I think I see the problem. Nurse bring me a surgical kit. Don't worry ma'am this won't hurt a bit." The dwarf lady closes her eyes in painful anticipation. The doctor begins snipping away and finishes a few minutes later. "There you go, ma'am, try that." She walks back and forth around the office and exclaims, "That's great, Doc, what did you do?!" To which the doctor replied, "I just took a couple of inches off the top of your rain boots." ____________________________________________________
Great dinner entertainment.

Today, October 17, in

1469 - Ferdinand of Aragon married Isabella of Castile. 
 The marriage united all the dominions of Spain. 
1685 - King Louis XIV of France revoked the Edict of Nantes, 
 which had established the legal toleration of the Protestant 
 population. 
1767 - The Mason-Dixon line was agreed upon. It was the 
 boundary between Maryland and Pennsylvania. 
1842 - Samuel Finley Breese Morse laid his first telegraph cable. 
1860 - British troops burned the Yuanmingyuan at the end of 
 the Second Opium War. 
1867 - The U.S. took formal possession of Alaska from Russia. 
 The land was purchased of a total of $7 million dollars 
 (2 cents per acre). 
1892 - The first long-distance telephone line between Chicago, 
 IL, and New York City, NY, was opened. 
1898 - The American flag was raised in Puerto Rico only one 
 year after the Caribbean nation won its independence from Spain. 
1929 - The Judicial Committee of England’s Privy Council ruled 
 that women were to be considered as persons in Canada. 
1944 - Czechoslovakia was invaded by the Soviets during WWII. 
1956 - NFL commissioner Bert Bell disallowed the use of 
 radio-equipped helmets by NFL quarterbacks. 
1958 - The first computer-arranged marriage took place on 
 Art Linkletter's show. 
1961 - Henri Matiss' "Le Bateau" went on display at New York's 
 Museum of Modern Art. It was discovered 46 days later that the 
 painting had been hanging upside down. 
1969 - The U.S. government banned artificial sweeteners due to 
 evidence that they caused cancer. 
1970 - Quebec's minister of labor was found strangled to death 
 after eight days of being held captive by the Quebec Liberation 
 Front (FLQ). 
1983 - General Motors agreed to hire more women and minorities 
 for five years as part of a settlement with the Equal Employment 
 Opportunity Commission. 
1989 - The space shuttle Atlantis was launched on a mission that 
 included the deployment of the Galileo space probe. 
1990 - Iraq made an offer to the world that it would sell oil for 
 $21 a barrel. The price level was the same as it had been before 
 the invasion of Kuwait. 
2013 - Saudi Arabia became the first nation to reject a seat on 
 the United Nations Security Council. Jordan took the seat Dec 6.
2015  smiled.


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How to partition a drive 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Saturday, October 17

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Florida woman arrested for shoplifting dresses Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 17, in 1777 American troops defeated British forces in Saratoga, NY. It was the turning point in the American Revolutionary War. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ There are two kinds of light--the glow that illuminates, and the glare that obscures --- James Thurber (1894 - 1961) It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that they are difficult. --- Seneca (5 BC - 65 AD) The shortest and surest way to live with honor in the world is to be in reality what we would appear to be. --- Socrates ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Aaron bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Valentine's Day. His friend Benny remarked: "I thought she wanted one of those pretty 4-Wheel drive cars." "She did," Aaron replied. "But where in the world I was a fake Jeep going to find!" ______________________________________________________ Also known as 'women's intuition,' this sixth sense thing is no myth. Women usually seem to know what's going on in their man's lives almost better than they do themselves. Why is this? They empty his pockets before throwing his laundry into the washing machine. ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Aree Riveros, 58, Tampa, Florida.
Florida woman arrested for shoplifting dresses A woman caught stealing a pair of Calvin Klein dresses and a Michael Kors jacket told cops that she swiped the fancy threads because she “needed something to wear to her son’s High School Football Banquet,” according to a police report. Despite that explanation, Aree Riveros, 58, was still arrested on a felony theft charge for allegedly boosting the garments Saturday from a Macy’s in Clearwater, Florida. The clothing, valued at $428, was found in Riveros’s purse after she was confronted by security upon exiting the store. Riveros, pictured above, is free on $2000 bond. An arrest affidavit does not explain why the Tampa resident needed two dresses for her son’s gridiron banquet
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Elaine Re: How do I make partitions? Dear Webby I agree that partitions would be really helpful in sorting out the mess. The braindead mess on C: is a real nuisance. So, how do I do it? Elaine Dear Elaine I use Partition Wizard. There are other partitioning softwares, but I have used PartitionWizard for decades and never had a problem. They have a free version that does probably way more than what you plan to to. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ A young woman doctor tells the story about her 4 year old daughter. On the way to pre-school, the doctor had left her stethoscope on the car seat, and her little girl picked it up and began playing with it. "Be still, my heart," thought the doctor, "My daughter wants to follow in my footsteps!" Then, with all the earnestness of a Social Sciences major the child spoke into the instrument, "Wowcome to McDonald's. Do ya want fwies wif that?" ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Egg Carton Gardening Egg cartons are a great biodegradable way to do seed-start gardening. Simply cut off the sides and lid from your carton. Place the cut lid under the carton base to catch leaking water. Fill the holes three-quarters full with potting soil. Place your seeds in the soil then cover them with a thin layer of the potting soil. Mist as needed to germinate. If you're using a different type of egg container, such as plastic, which doesn't drain, just punch a tiny hole in the bottom of each egg bed. By attosa [128] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Money It can buy a House...............But not a Home It can buy a Bed.................But not Sleep It can buy a Clock...............But not Time It can buy you a Book............But not knowledge It can buy you a Position........But not Respect It can buy you Medicine..........But not Health It can buy you Blood.............But not Life It can buy you Sex...............But not Love So you see money isn't everything. And it often causes pain and suffering. I tell you all this because I am your Friend, and as your Friend I want to take away your pain and suffering. So send me all your money, and I will suffer for you. PayPal or check only, please. Thought this was gonna be one of those "inspirational" ones, didn't you ? However, if you do feel inspired, I sure would appreciate it if you hit the PayPal button! ___________________________________________________
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=irDxNnzM868"> src="http://webby.com/humor/Noella-back-gold.jpg" align=left>
Ponsse Scorpion King On Board
____________________________________________________ On some air bases the Air Force is on one side of the field and civilian aircraft use the other side of the field, with the control tower in the middle. One day the tower received a call from an aircraft asking, "What time is it?" The tower responded, "Who is calling?" The aircraft replied, "What difference does it make?" The tower replied "It makes a lot of difference. If it is an American Airlines Flight, it is 3 o'clock. If it is an Air Force, it is 1500 hours. If it is a Navy aircraft, it is 6 bells. If it is an Army aircraft, it's afternoon coffee time. If it is a Marine Corps aircraft, it's Thursday. If it is Coast Guard, it's two before supper. If it is a Cessna, it's 3 hours to happy hour." The reply was: "It's a Piper. Where the heck am I?" ____________________________________________________
Artist adds surreal twist to photos on Instagram

Today, October 17, in
1739	Thomas Coram was granted a Royal Charter from George II 
 so a "hospital for the maintenance and education of exposed and 
 deserted young children" in Londond, England. 
1777 American troops defeated British forces in Saratoga, NY. 
It was the turning point in the American Revolutionary War. 
1888 The first issue of "National Geographic Magazine" was 
 released at newsstands. 
1931 Al Capone was convicted on income tax evasion and was 
 sentenced to 11 years in prison. He was released in 1939. 
1933 Dr. Albert Einstein moved to Princeton, NJ, after 
 leaving Germany. 
1945 Colonel Juan Peron became the dictator of Argentina 
 after staging a coup in Buenos Aires. 
1973 The Organization of Petroleum Exporting Countries (OPEC) 
 began an oil-embargo against several countries including the 
 U.S. and Great Britain. The incident stemmed from Western 
 support of Israel when Egypt and Syria attacked the nation on 
 October 6, 1973. The embargo lasted until March of 1974. 
1978 U.S. President Carter signed a bill that restored full 
 U.S. citizenship rights to Confederate President Jefferson Davis. 
1989 An earthquake measuring 7.1 on the Richter Scale hit the 
 San Francisco Bay area in California. The quake caused about 
 67 deaths, 3,000 injuries, and damages up to $7 billion. 
1994 Israel and Jordan initialed a draft peace treaty. 
1994 The Angolan government and rebels agreed to a peace treaty 
 that ended their 19 years of civil war. 
1997 The remains of revolutionary Ernesto "Che" Guevara were laid 
 to rest in his adopted Cuba, 30 years after his execution in Bolivia. 
2000 Patrick Roy (Colorado Avalanche) achieved his 448th victory 
 as a goalie in the NHL. Roy passed Terry Sawchuck to become the 
 record holder for career victories. 
2001 Israel's tourism minister was killed. A radical Palestinian 
 faction claimed that it had carried out the assassination to avenge 
 the killing of its leader by Israel 2 months earlier. 
2001 Pakistan placed its armed forces on high alert because of troop 
 movements by India in the disputed territory of Kashmir. India said 
 that the movements were part of a normal troop rotation. 
2001 Italian priest Giuseppe "Beppe" Pierantoni was kidnapped by the 
 terrorist group the "Pentagon." He was released on April 8, 2002. 
2003 In the U.S., the Food and Drug Administration approved a drug, 
 known as memantine, to help people with Alzheimer's symptoms. 
2003 In Taipei, Taiwan, construction crews finished 1,676-foot-tall-
 building called Taipei 101. The building was planned to open for 
 business in 2004. 
2015  smiled.


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Partitions 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Friday, October 16
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!


Thank you Gloria !!


Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Florida Man arrested and wheeled to jail for wheelchair DUI Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 16, in 1955 Mrs. Jules Lederer replaced Ruth Crowley in newspapers using the name Ann Landers. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ Go, and never darken my towels again. --- Groucho Marx (1890 - 1977) Love is an exploding cigar we willingly smoke. --- Lynda Barry ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ The lawyer emailed his client overseas: "Your mother-in-law passed away in her sleep. Do you want us to order burial or cremation ?" Back came the reply, "Take no chances - order both, but not in that order." ______________________________________________________ The cowboy who was preparing the horses for the tourists asked a lady she wanted a Western or an English saddle, and she asked what the difference was. He told her one had a horn and the other one didn't. She replied, "The one without the horn is fine. I don't expect we'll run into too much traffic out here." ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Ronny Scott Hicks, 54, Palm bay Florida
Florida Man arrested and wheeled to jail for wheelchair DUI Ronny Scott Hicks has two prior DUI convictions, but his arrest on Monday night was slightly more memorable. The 54-year-old Florida man was arrested Monday night after police in Palm Bay got reports of a man in a motorized wheelchair blocking traffic, according to ClickOrlando.com. Hicks has two previous DUI convictions, neither while driving a wheelchair, according to officials. When officers arrived on the scene, they allegedly saw Hicks sitting in his wheelchair blocking traffic. Officers said he smelled of alcohol and was slurring his words, according to WBRZ.com. Hicks allegedly refused to take a breathalyzer test, according to WTSP.com. He was taken into custody, refused treatment for an open wound, and remains behind bars at the Brevard County Jail on $5,000 bond.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: CyberGrannie Re: Partitions Dear Webby I have a HP laptop with w7 and it has 4 "partitions" or rather that is what it looks like. This is what it looks like: 8 GB ram Hard disk drives 4: C: 275GB D: 298GB F (recovery) 21.9Gb G: (HP tools) 99.3MB It seems these are not partitions so I cannot combine Disk 1 (C drive) and disk 2 (D drive) This seems so ridiculous. Do you know of any way that I can combine these 2 "disks"? This laptop was just restored to original state (with 2 original disks). Dear CyberGrannie That looks OK. Why combine them? By the way, D: might be a removable "drive" like DVD. Just use them as they are. You would not gain anything by combining them anyway. For example, I have always used my E: drive for tools and programs, and my F: drive for data, that I have produced. Having extra drives or partitions allows you to have short destination, like for example E:\Alpha\Eudora instead of having my email program buried deep down in the wacky chaos on C: Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Arthur came home after a late-night poker game and was greeted by Sandra, his nagging, sourpussed wife. "And just where have you been all night?," sandra screeched at him. "Playing cards," says Arthur, "but that's not important. What matters is that I lost you to Bubba Smith." "Lost me!!" Sandra screamed, "How did you manage that?" "It was a heartbreaker," Michael admitted. "I had to fold with a royal flush." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Dieter's Chocolate Mousse This is very simple. No cooking and you can make it the strength or quantity you desire. Just take natural Greek style yoghurt, or any other non flavored yoghurt. Add cooking style cocoa powder. This has no added sugars at all. You can also add vanilla. Simply mix it up in whatever strength you want. You do have to mix thoroughly because the cocoa powder seems to sit on the surface. You can make it a strong or weak chocolaty taste, getting your "chocolate fix" without the guilt. If it is a bit strong, you can always add a few drops of pure vanilla essence. That's it, simple! Approximate Time: INSTANTLY Yield: WHATEVER YOU MIX UP. Source: NO. MY OWN CONCOCTION. I HAVE NO IMAGE BECAUSE THE IMAGE IS WHAT IT IS. By Trixie Pettman-South [2] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Norrissa was nervous the night her new boyfriend invited her and her three young sons to an upscale restaurant for the first time. He ordered a bottle of wine with the meal. When the server brought it, the children became quiet as she began the ritual uncorking. When the waitress poured a small amount for Norissa to taste and handed her the glass, her six-year-old piped up, "Mom usually drinks a LOT more than that!" ___________________________________________________
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2tNwrzxaYs8"> src="http://webby.com/humor/Noella-back-gold.jpg" align=left>
courtesy flush
____________________________________________________ Noella's brother has just returned from a visit to Israel and reported to her this about elevators in Israel: Apparently Shabat is the Sabbath and in some cities, it is observed faithfully. On that day, the elevators are set to stop at every floor so no one has to "work" and press a button. Usually there is one elevator that is still and does not run except for opening and closing doors. The doors stay closed for 7 minutes and then open - while the elevator doesn't move. One never knows which elevator is the Shabat elevator. So people will get on it accidentally, the doors close and 7 minutes go by. The door opens, everyone gets off and the elevator fills up with new people. Meanwhile the people who just got off are trying to tell the new ones - don't get on, it won't go anywhere. But of course no one listens, so the process starts all over and continues all day long! ____________________________________________________
I never knew there was a real little girl behind Alice in Wonderland that had to do all the motions as well as the voice.

Today, October 16, in
1793 During the French Revolution, Queen Marie Antoinette 
 was beheaded after being convicted of treason. 
1829 In Boston, MA, the first modern hotel in America opened. 
 The Tremont Hotel had 170 rooms that rented for $2 a day 
 and included four meals. 
1859 Abolitionist John Brown led a raid on Harper's Ferry, VA 
 (now located in West Virginia). 
1869 A hotel in Boston became the first in the U.S. to install 
 indoor plumbing. 
1916 Margaret Sanger opened the first birth control clinic in 
 New York City, NY. 
1923 Walt Disney contracted with M.J. Winkler to distribute 
 the Alice Comedies. This event is recognized as the start of 
 the Disney Company. 
1928 Marvin Pipkin received a patent for the frosted electric 
 light bulb. 
1941 The Nazis advanced to within 60 miles of Moscow. Romanians 
 entered Odessa, USSR, and began exterminating 150,000 Jews. 
1943 Chicago's new subway system was officially opened
1955 Mrs. Jules Lederer replaced Ruth Crowley in newspapers 
 using the name Ann Landers. 
1962 U.S. President Kennedy was informed that there were missile 
 bases in Cuba, beginning the Cuban missile crisis. 
1964 China detonated its first atomic bomb becoming the world's 
 fifth nuclear power. 
1967 NATO headquarters opened in Brussels. 
1970 Anwar Sadat was elected president of Egypt to succeed 
 Gamal Abdel Nassar. 
1973 Henry Kissinger and Le Duc Tho were named winners of the 
 Nobel Peace Prize. The Vietnamese official declined the award. 
1982 China announced that it had successfully fired a ballistic 
 missile from a submarine. 
1987 Rescuers freed Jessica McClure from the abandoned well 
 that she had fallen into in Midland, TX. The was trapped for 58 hours. 
1993 The U.N. Security Council approved the deployment of U.S. 
 warships to enforce a blockade on Haiti to increase pressure 
 on the controlling military leaders. 
2000 It was announced that Chevron Corp. would be buying Texaco Inc. 
 for $35 billion. The combined company was called Chevron Texaco 
 Corp. and became the 4th largest oil company in the world. 
2002 It was reported that North Korea had told the U.S. that it 
 had a secret nuclear weapons program in violation of a 1994 
 agreement with the U.S. 
2002 The Arthur Andersen accounting firm was sentenced to five 
 years probation and fined $500,000 for obstructing a federeal 
 investigation of the energy company Enron. 
2008 The iTunes Music Store reached 200 billion television 
 episodes sold.
2015  smiled.


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Ready for W10, or not? 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Thursday, October 15

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a S.C. man who battered wife after she posted his bail. Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 15, in 1860 Grace Bedell, 11 years old, wrote a letter to presidential candidate Abraham Lincoln. The letter stated that Lincoln would look better if he would grow a beard. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ I believe that people would be alive today if there were a death penalty. --- Nancy Reagan (1921 - ) Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people. --- Robert Benchley (1889 - 1945) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ The Italians have followed the ages old tradition of naming their boats with a three-letter prefix. For example: USA uses USS which means "United States Ship." The British uses HMS which means "Her Majesty's Ship." and now...Italy is using AMB which apparently means "At's-a My Boat!" ______________________________________________________ was at a yard sale one day and saw a box marked "Electronic cat and dog caller -- guaranteed to work." looked inside and was amused to see an electric can opener. ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Noella for this picture: ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Robert Christian Chandler, 30, Myrtle Beach South Carolina
Bonehead battered wife after she posted his bail Moments after his wife bailed him out of jail today, a South Carolina man punched the woman in the face as the pair walked out the police department’s front door, according to an arrest report. Robert Christian Chandler, 30, was freed from the Myrtle Beach jail around midnight after his spouse posted $262 bond. But Chandler, who had been locked up on a disorderly conduct charge, did not appear grateful for his release. “What are you doing here, ho?” Chandler asked his wife multiple times, cops reported. A surveillance camera in the police department’s lobby recorded Chandler “grabbing the victim aggressively” as they walked toward the front door. Upon exiting police headquarters, Chandler punched his wife in the face, according to a police dispatch supervisor who witnessed the attack. Video shows the woman “hitting the wall outside the doors,” while the supervisor can be heard saying, “He just hit her.” The 30-year-old victim had cuts on her right arm and her nose was swollen, police noted. While acknowledging that Chandler “grabbed and shoved her,” she said that she did not want him “in any more trouble as she just bailed him out of jail.” Chandler, seen above, was arrested at the police station and returned to jail, this time for misdemeanor domestic violence. However, the unemployed Chandler only spent about ten hours in custody before he was released from the lockup on a $2130 personal recognizance bond.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Cora Re: Windows 10 nagger Dear Webby Good Morning Webby, Have been getting pop ups to get Windows 10 installed. What are your thoughts about it now? What bothers me is.....if I get it installed and donā€™t like it then what? Really undecided on this. Any help you can give please. Cora Dear Cora Neither your machine nor you are ready for Windows 10. It is just a scam to get you to buy a new computer. There IS a secret way to go back, theoretically, but it is apparently neither easy nor totally complete. IF and when your current machine dies of old age and you HAVE to replace it, by then the new machines will probably have Windows 11 or 12 on them. It is not a good idea to volunteer to become a guinea pig on a x.0 version. At the very least, wait until 10.1 or 10.2 Also keep in mind, would you buy a detergent or soap if you were pestered with rude naggers like they do with Windows 10, or would you tell them where to stuff their soap ? Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ "I'm ashamed of you," the mother said. "Fighting with your best friend is a terrible thing to do!" "He threw a rock at me!" the boy said. "So I threw one at him." The mother stated emphatically, "When he threw a rock at you, you should have come to me." The boy quickly replied, "What good would that have done? You can't hit a garbage can from two feet away! My aim is much better than yours!" ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Muffin in a Minute (Microwave) This is a recipe that can be varied to your taste. It is healthy, fast and will never get boring. Approximate Time: Less than 5 minutes Yield: 1 muffin Ingredients: 1/4 cup flaxseed meal (can grind the flaxseeds yourself, if you prefer) 1/2 tsp baking powder 1/2 tsp cinnamon 1 Tbsp Splenda (optional) 1 egg Steps: Get the cup and put the flaxseed meal in. Add the baking powder. Add the cinnamon. Add the Splenda, if using. Add the egg. Mix everything together. Cook for a minute in the microwave. Turn it out on a plate. If it looks too wet, let it sit for a minute or two. Mine was fine. You can add blueberries or other fruit. You can also put in a tablespoon of cream cheese before cooking. Store the flaxseed meal in the freezer to keep longer. Nutritional Value for Plain Muffin: Calories: 195, Fat: 9 grams, Protein: 12 grams, Carbs: 9 grams (net carbs 1 gram), Fiber: 8 grams, Sugars: 0 grams Source: Pantry Challenge Yahoo Group By Judy Pariser S. [35] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Little Johnny's class was having an English lesson, and the teacher called on Little Johnny to recite a sentence with a direct object. Little Johnny stood and thought, then said, "Teacher, I think you have lost weight." "Why thank you, Little Johnny," the teacher said, blushing. "But what is the direct object?" "A good report card next month," he replied. ___________________________________________________

Older Ladies
____________________________________________________ "When I was a youngster," complained the frustrated father, "I was disciplined by being sent to my room without supper. But my son has his own TV, phone, computer and DVD player. "So what do you do?" asked his friend. "I send him to MY room!" ____________________________________________________
Leaky concrete. Hire the right people if you want a complicated job done. I can't imagine that helicopter pilot having that level of control.

Today, October 15, in
1815 Napoleon Bonaparte began his exile on the remote island of 
 St. Helena in the Atlantic Ocean. 
1860 Grace Bedell, 11 years old, wrote a letter to presidential 
 candidate Abraham Lincoln. The letter stated that Lincoln would 
 look better if he would grow a beard. 
1892 The U.S. government announced that the land in western 
 Montana was open to settlers. The 1.8 million acres were bought 
 from the Crow Indians for 50 cents per acre. 
1937 "To Have and Have Not" by Ernest Hemingway was published 
 for the first time. 
1945 Pierre Laval, the former premier of Vichy France, was executed 
 for treason. 
1946 Hermann Goering, a Nazi war criminal and founder of the 
 Gestapo, poisoned himself just hours before his scheduled 
 execution. 
1964 It was announced that Soviet leader Nikita Khrushchev had 
 been removed from power. He was replaced with Alexei N. Kosygin. 
1983 U.S. Marines killed five snipers who had pinned them down 
 in Beirut International Airport. 
1984 The Freedom of Information Act was passed. 
1989 Wayne Gretzky, while playing for the Los Angeles Kings, 
 surpassed Gordie Howe's NHL scoring record of 1,850 career 
 points. 
1993 U.S. President Clinton sent warships to enforce trade 
 sanctions that had been imposed on Haitian military rulers. 
1997 British Royal Air Force pilot Andy Green broke the 
 land-speed record by driving a jet-powered car faster than 
 the speed of sound. 
1997 The Cassini-Huygens mission was launched from Cape 
 Canaveral, FL. On January 14, 2005, a probe sent back 
 pictures of Saturn's moon Titan during and after landing. 
1998 The U.N. condemned the U.S. economic embargo on Cuba 
 for the seventh year in a row. 
2001 NASA's Galileo spacecraft passed within 112 miles of 
 Jupiter's moon Io. 
2015  smiled.


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PDF Reader 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Wednesday, October 14

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Florida DUI suspect arrested after she broadcast her wild ride on Periscope. Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 14, in 1066 The Battle of Hastings occurred in England. The Norman forces of William the Conqueror defeated King Harold II of England. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ Politics is the skilled use of blunt objects. --- Lester B. Pearson (1897 - 1972) Good advice is something a man gives when he is too old to set a bad example. --- Francois de La Rochefoucauld Nobody knows the age of the human race, but everybody agrees that it is old enough to know better. --- Socratex ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Old age is when former classmates are so gray and wrinkled, they don't recognize you. ______________________________________________________ While waiting for my first appointment in the reception room of a new dentist, I noticed his certificate, which bore his full name. Suddenly, I remembered that a guy with his name had been in my high school class almost 50 years ago. Upon seeing him, however, I quickly discarded any such thought. This balding, gray-haired man with the deeply lined face was too old to have been my classmate. After he had examined my teeth, I asked him if he had attended the local high school. "Yes," he replied. "Graduated in 1955." "You were in my class!" I exclaimed. He looked at me closely and then asked, "What did you teach?" ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Whitney Beall, 23, Lakeland, Florida
DUI suspect arrested after she broadcast her wild ride on Periscope Drinking and driving don't mix, but it's an especially dangerous cocktail when you're live streaming your wild ride on Periscope. Police in Lakeland, Florida, arrested 23-year-old Whitney Beall Friday night after receiving 911 calls from Periscope viewers reporting that a drunken driver was using the app to broadcast herself, according to WFTV.com. Periscope is an app owned by Twitter that lets people livestream events over social media. Police said Beall told viewers she was "drunk," F---ing drunk," and didn't know where she was. At one point, she said had a flat tire, according to Fox13.com. Thanks to numerous 911 calls, officers were able to track down her Toyota Corolla. Although Lakeland Police officers are not authorized to use Periscope, one of the officers added the app to his own phone in order to track the suspect, according to WTSP.com. When the officers initiated a traffic stop, Beall hit a curb, according to WFTV.com "I really hope I don't get a DUI," she allegedly said seconds before hitting a sign in the median, a moment captured on video. When Beall was finally apprehended, officers said she smelled of booze, spoke slowly and had bloodshot, glossy eyes, according to TBO.com. Police said Beall failed a sobriety test and refused a breath test to determine her blood-alcohol level. The suspect was booked into the Polk County Jail on DUI charges. She was released Saturday on a $500 bond, according to jail records.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Dave Re: PDF reader Dear Webby I hope all is well by you. I have heard some good things about Nitro PDF reader. I wanted to know if you heard anything about it. Dave Hi Dave Yes, I have written favorably about it, and have used Nitro for many years. It is quite OK. Using it to fill forms takes a bit of experimenting. You almost have to read the instructions! Once you get used to it, though, it works quite well. Scan your signature and save it as a jpg or pnp file. Then you can even insert your signature onto a form, and then fax it, without ever using up any of YOUR paper. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ The story is told of a day when Queen Elizabeth had the Duke Of Edinbourgh over for a cup of tea. The conversation turned equestrian and the Queen was telling the Duke about her new prize horse. After a spell of ranting and raving over this horse the Duke said, "Well, then, let's see this fine animal!" So the Queen and the Duke went over to the stables to admire the horse. At one point the Queen walked around the horse, just as it let out an earth trembling fart, with a smell that brought tears to everybody's eyes and blistered the paint ... let's just say it was awesome.. The Queen turned a bit red and said, "Oh, I am terribly sorry about that!" "Oh, that's quite alright," the Duke replied, "I had thought it was the horse!" ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Quick Bread from Dumpling Mix I ran out of bread today, so I tried making up two packets of dumpling mix into a loaf. It came out light and aerated. The texture looked a little rubbery, so I sliced and toasted it. The crust was a bit brittle and tended to flake off when slicing. It tasted really nice toasted. I am thinking of experimenting with rolls next time. The mix that I used required only water to be added, so possibly a good option for an emergency food kit. By Verity Pink [38] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Mrs. Trent, seated in her living room, heard the back door slam. Thinking it was her young son, she called, "I'm in here, darling. I've been waiting for you." There was no answer for a moment and then a strange voice faltered, "I'm sorry, Ma'am, but I ain't your regular milkman." ___________________________________________________

Explosions
____________________________________________________ Little Johnny was sitting in the courtyard turning a bottle of liquid back and forth, watching the bubbles. The Priest walked up and asked him what he was doing? Little Johnny replied, "I'm looking at the most powerful liquid in the world." The Priest said, "But Johnny, Holy Water is the most powerful liquid in the world. Did you know that if you put Holy Water on your forehead every day, bad thoughts will pass away." Little Johnny said, "Big deal! This is TURPENTINE! If you put this on a cat's butt, he'll pass a Harley Davidson, maybe even a Kawasaki!" ____________________________________________________
Leaky concrete. This is amazing!

Today, October 14, in
1066 The Battle of Hastings occurred in England. The Norman 
 forces of William the Conqueror defeated King Harold II of England. 
1879 Thomas Edison signed an agreement with Jose D. Husbands 
 for the sale of Edison telephones in Chile. 
1887 Thomas Edison and George E. Gouraud reached an agreement 
 for the international marketing rights for the phonograph. 
1888 In England, Louis Le Prince filmed the experimental film 
 "Roundhay Garden Scene." It is the oldest surviving motion picture. 
1912 Theodore Roosevelt was shot while campaigning in Milwaukee, WI. 
 Roosevelt's wound in the chest was not serious and he continued 
 with his planned speech. William Schrenk was captured at the scene 
 of the shooting. 
1922 Lieutenant Lester James Maitland set a new airplane speed 
 record when he reached a speed of 216.1 miles-per-hour. 
1930 Ethel Merman debuted on Broadway in "Girl Crazy." 
1933 Nazi Germany announced that it was withdrawing from the 
 League of Nations. 
1944 German Field Marshal Erwin Rommel committed suicide rather 
 than face execution after being accused of conspiring against 
 Adolf Hitler and the execution that would follow. 
1944 During World War II, the Second British Parachute Brigade 
 liberated the city of Athens. 
1947 Over Rogers Dry Lake in Southern California, pilot Chuck 
 Yeager flew the Bell X-1 rocket plane and became the first American 
 to break the sound barrier. 
1954 C.B. DeMille's "The Ten Commandments", starring Charlton Heston, 
 began filming in Egypt. The epic had a cast of 25,000 people. 
1960 U.S. presidential candidate John F. Kennedy first suggested 
 the idea of a Peace Corps. 
1962 The Cuban Missile Crisis began. It was on this day that U.S. 
 intelligence personnel analyzing data discovered Soviet 
 medium-range missile sites in Cuba. On October 22 U.S. 
 President John F. Kennedy announced that he had ordered the 
 naval "quarantine" of Cuba. 
1968 The first live telecast to come from a manned U.S. spacecraft 
 was transmitted from Apollo 7. 
1970 Anwar el-Sadat became president of Egypt following the death 
 of President Nasser. 
1972 In Iraq, oil was struck for the first time just north of Kirkuk. 
1987 Jessica McClure, 18 months old, fell down an abandoned well in 
 Midland, TX. The rescue took 58 hours. 
2002 Britain stripped power from the Catholic and Protestant politicians 
 of Northern Ireland. Britain resumed sole responsibility for running 
 Northern Ireland. 
2015  smiled.


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Font colors 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Tuesday, October 13

A couple of days ago I noticed that my new neighbors in the 
East had a huge pile of oversize garbage bags filled with 
leaves, and their lawns were already getting covered with 
leaves again and looking just like mine.

I looked at the sky and noticed the beginnings of an arch.
That is a sign of an impending Chinook. (Stormy wind from
the West, 40 gusting to 65, sometimes higher).

On today's walk I noticed that my lawn was clean. No leaves.
My neighbor's lawn had the truckload of bagged leaves gone,
and their lawns were covered with leaves again.

It helps to have obstructions, like my row of Saskatoon 
berries, in line with the wind.

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a SC man, who was arrested after he called 911 To Complain That His Girlfriend Will Not Have Sex With Him Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 11, in 1792 The cornerstone of the Executive Mansion was laid in Washington, DC. It was burned by angry Canucks in 1812. After that the remains had to be scraped and whitewashed. The building became known as the White House in 1818. After that the Americans walked up to Canada and burned down York (Toronto). More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people. --- Lucille S. Harper There is no nonsense so arrant that it cannot be made the creed of the vast majority by adequate governmental action. --- Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ At Finnegan's wake, Katy Ryan remarked about the corpse: 'Doesn't he look happy?' 'Yes,' said the widow Finnegan. 'He died in his sleep and he doesn't know he's dead yet! In fact,' she went on, 'if he wakes up in the morning the shock will kill him!' ______________________________________________________ The following ad appeared in a newspaper. Single Black Female Seeks Male companionship, ethnicity unimportant. Good looking girl who LOVES to play. I love long walks in the woods. Riding in your pickup truck.Hunting, Camping, Fishing trips. Cozy winter nights spent lying by the fire. Candlelight dinners will have me eating out of your hand. Rub me the right way and watch me respond. I'll be at the front door when you get home from work, wearing only what nature gave me. Kiss me and I'm yours. Call 555-XXXX and ask for Daisy. (The phone number was the Dog Pound and Daisy was an eight week old Black Labrador Retriever.) ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Noella for sending this picture: Back Of Crescent ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Patrick Doggett, 53, Spartanburg, South Carolina
SC man arrested after he called 911 To Complain That His Girlfriend Will Not Have Sex With Him A South Carolina man called 911 early this morning to complain that his girlfriend would not have sex with him, according to an arrest report. When a cop responded to his Spartanburg residence, Patrick Doggett, 53, “stated he called 911 because his girlfriend, Ms. Faye Woodruff, would not give him any ass.” Woodruff told police that Doggett had been drinking all day and “didn’t know where he was at.” She added that Doggett got into bed and wanted to have sex, but “she had her grandchild with her.” So, Woodruff noted, Doggett "got up and then dialed 911." Doggett, who was outside the residence drinking an alcoholic beverage when police arrived, was arrested for public intoxication and booked into the county jail (where he remains locked up this afternoon). Pictured above, Doggett has not been cited for misusing the 911 system, according to jail records.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Many Re: Font Color From all the replies I gather that the problem is monitor brightness. I send the font color "Navy". So does Ophelia. Most people find that more readable and more relaxing than black. Now, get this: Some people like the fonts "Black, as they are now." Some people like the fonts "Blue, as they are now." And the majority likes the fonts "Navy, as they are now." That indicates to me that 1) Some people have their monitor set too dark, and they see the Navy colored fonts as black. 2) Some people have their monitor set too bright, and they see the Navy color as Blue. 3) That the majority have set the brightness optimally for their eyes, and they see all the colors as intended. I shudder to think how beautiful flowers or sunsets get trashed, if the colors are shifted. Turn the monitor brightness a tad, up or down, until my fonts look "Navy". Easier on the eyes, and colors are more natural. Just use the font color to calibrate the overall brightness. You can do that with the buttons at the bottom of the monitor, and with some monitors even from Windows. Neil sent this link: Calibrate" target="_blank" >http://windows.microsoft.com/is-IS/wind ... ;Calibrate colors from Windows Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ A man walks into an animal hospital with a gigantic parrot and asks to have the bird's beak and talons and wings trimmed. The owner warns the veterinarian's assistant that the bird dislikes these procedures and is apt to bite. The assistant puts on thick gloves and cautiously opens the cage. The parrot steps out, then looks at the wary assistant. "Don't worry," the parrot squawks. "I won't hurt you." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Egg Cloud Recipes I love this recipe because it only has two ingredients and turns into something deliciously elegant. With the high prices on eggs these days, this is nice way to stretch your money. Approximate Time: 10 Yield: 3 clouds Ingredients: 3 eggs 1/4 cup Parmesan cheese Steps: Preheat oven to 400 degrees F. Line a baking pan with parchment paper. Separate your egg yolks from the whites. Whip the egg whites at high speed for a few minutes until stiff peaks form. Fold in the Parmesan cheese. Divide the fluffy whites into 3 cloud shapes on the baking sheet. Using a spoon, hollow out a well on each cloud where you will be dropping your egg yolk. [Later] Bake egg white cloud for a few minutes. Remove from oven, and drop an egg yolk into each cloud. Bake another 3 minutes. Enjoy your beautiful creation! By attosa [125] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ How to build a camp fire 1. Split dead tree limb into fragments and shave one fragment into slivers. 2. Bandage left thumb. 3. Chop other fragments into smaller fragments 4. Bandage left foot. 5. Make pyramid of slivers (include those embedded in hand) 6. Light Match 7. Find a dry match and light it 8. Borrow a lighter and use it to light match. 9. Apply match to slivers, add wood fragments, and blow gently into base of fire. 10. Apply burn ointment to nose. 11. When fire is burning, collect more wood. 12. Upon discovering that fire has gone out while out searching for more wood, soak wood from can labeled "kerosene." 13. Treat face and arms for second-degree burns. 14. Relabel can to read "gasoline." 15. When fire is burning well, add all remaining firewood. 16. Apologize for burning down all the tents and the outhouse 17. When thunder storm has passed, gather more firewood and try again, applying lessons learned in steps 1-15. ___________________________________________________

school lunch
____________________________________________________ It may still be summer where you are, but in South Carolina it's the season of the big fall mosquitos. The other evening, a man walked out into his yard and two mosquitos picked him up. As they lifted him, one says to the other, "Let's take him down by the lake and have a picnic." The other one said, "No way ! If we carry him down there, the big mosquitos will take him away from us." ____________________________________________________
What people in 1900 thought the year 2000 would look like.

Today, October 13, in
1775 The U.S. Continental Congress ordered the construction 
 of a naval fleet. 
1792 The cornerstone of the Executive Mansion was laid in 
 Washington, DC. It was burned by angry Canucks in 1812. After that
 the remains had to be scraped and whitewashed. The building became 
 known as the White House in 1818. 
1812 American forces were defeated at the Battle of Queenstown 
 Heights. The British victory effectively ended an further U.S. 
 invasion of Canada. 
1843 B'nai B'rith, the Jewish organization, was founded by Henry 
 Jones and eleven others in New York City, NY. 
1854 The state of Texas ratified a state constitution. 
1943 During World War II, Italy changed sides, signed an 
 armistice with the Allies and declared war on their ally, Germany. 
1944 American troops entered Aachen, Germany, during World War II. 
1944 During World War II, British and Greek advance units landed 
 at Piraeus. 
1951 In Atlanta, GA, a football with a rubber covering was used for 
 the first time. Georgia Tech beat Louisiana State 25-7. 
1953 An ultrasonic burglar alarm was patented by Samuel Bagno. 
1957 Bing Crosby and Frank Sinatra introduced the Ford Edsel on 
 an hour long special. 
1962 "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?" opened on Broadway. 
1981 Egyptian voters elected Vice President Hosni Mubarak as the 
 new president one week after Anwar Sadat was assassinated. 
1989 U.S. President George H.W. Bush called for an overthrow of 
 the Panamanian ruler Manuel Antonio Noriega. 
1992 A commercial flight record was set by an Air France 
 supersonic jetliner for circling the Earth in 33 hours and 
 one minute. No passengers, just lots of fuel.
2010 Near Copiapó, Chile, 33 miners were trapped underground in 
 San José Mine. The miners were rescued after 69 days underground. 
2015  smiled.


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Multiple browsers at the same time 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Sunday, October 11



Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Colorado burglar arrested in jail after poopy shorts are analyzed a year later Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 11, in 1811 The Juliana, the first steam-powered ferryboat, was put into operation by the inventor John Stevens. The ferry went between New York City, NY, and Hoboken, NJ. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ Science is organized knowledge. Wisdom is organized life. --- Immanuel Kant (1724 - 1804) Thanks to the Interstate Highway System, it is now possible to travel from coast to coast without seeing anything. --- Charles Kuralt ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ >From Clyde An older gentleman was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation. As he was about to get the anesthesia, he asked to speak to his son. "Yes, Dad, what is it?" "Don't be nervous, son; do your best, and just remember, if it doesn't go well, if something happens to me, your mother is going to come and live with you and your wife." ______________________________________________________ A doctor has come to see one of his patients in a hospital. The patient has had major surgery to both of his hands. "Doctor," says the man excitedly and dramatically holds up his heavily bandaged hands. "The nurse told me that I will be able to play the piano when these bandages come off?" "I don't see why not," replies the doctor. "Hmmm, then I better start learning to read sheet music!" ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Noella for this picture: ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Rodney Mark Hendrix, 49, Denver, Colorado
Colorado burglar arrested in jail after poopy shorts are analyzed a year later It was the doo doo that did him in. Rodney Mark Hendrix, 49, is accused of burglarizing a Denver pre-school and church in August 2014 and was caught due to a DNA test of a pair of poopy shorts left in a bathroom at the crime scene. A pre-school employee noticed the crap-stained clothes and put them in a plastic bag before the police arrived, according to the arrest affidavit. The responding officer took the contaminated shorts into evidence, but it took 13.5 months for them to worm their way through the forensic labs, according to Lynn Kimbrough, a spokesperson for the Denver District Attorney. "In Colorado, a DNA sample is taken of anyone who is arrested for a felony," Kimbrough told HuffPost. "So when they ran the unknown sample, his DNA was already in the system." Kimbrough didn't want to venture a guess as to what the poopy shorts smelled like after more than a year. Hendrix is accused of stealing two guitars from the church and numerous electronic items from the school, with a combined total value of $4,072. He was charged earlier this week of two counts of burglary, two counts of theft, and one count of identity theft, according to the arrest affidavit. The suspect was already in custody in the Colorado Department of Corrections on unrelated theft and drug cases when the s*** hit the fan, according to the Denver Post. Hendrix is is scheduled to appear in Denver County Court on Oct. 16 to be formally advised of the charges, according to CBS Denver.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Karl Re: Multiple browsers Hi Webby, Another great thing about running two different browsers side by side is you can have two accounts with the same company open at the same time. For example, I sometimes have my work gmail account open while having my personal gmail account open. If I only used one browser, I'd have to sign out of one or the other. Right now I have 3 browsers open. Firefox, SeaMonkey, and Lynx. I've had as many as four. People still use Lynx? I'm limited to five gigs a month. I read a lot of news articles on Lynx because it doesn't download all the crap on web pages. The average Lynx page download seems to be about 37K. Versus the 2-3 megs per page using a regular browser with javaScript enabled. Is it HTML 5 that brought us the bottomless webpage? God, I hate that. All those self loading videos and ads. It burns a lot of bandwidth plus it slows the system down. If you have anybody in the Denver area that's interested in making the switch to Linux, you can put them in touch with me. Karl Dear Karl Good point! Sometimes, when I am in the middle of a form on a borwser and don't want to leave that page, I open a different tab, but when I already have a lot of tabs open, then it is definitely better to open a different browser. I agree, for just reading text nothing gets even close to good ol Lynx on Linux. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ >From Ed I boarded the train and took my seat. The seat next to me was empty, but not for long. A young mother boarded with her 5-year-old daughter and Mom sat down in the seat beside me. I offered my seat to the little girl but Mom said no, she'd sit the young one on her lap. So here I am holding my roses, now with a little lady straining to see what I was holding. "What ya got, mister?" she asked. (Mom is getting a bit flustered and tells her to mind her business.) I leaned the "package" over a bit and she looks and says loudly, "Ohhhh, ROSES!, who are they for?" (Now, Mom is embarrassed and tapping her on the rear telling her to sit down.) I said, "they're for my girlfriend". The little 5 year old said, again with a loud voice, "WOW, pretty RED ones, and a LOT of them, too! Man, you really must have f****d up!" Her mother turned as red as the roses, but all the other passengers bust a gut laughing. ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Homemade Cat Litter Box After seeing a nifty cat box with a high price tag, I decided to make my own. It is a tote with a hole cut in the top of the lid. I had empty totes already so that didn't cost me anything. The litter does not get kicked out at all. Occasionally some is tracked, but it is way better than it being kicked out. My cats love it too. Additionally, I did buy a cat pan set that has two pans and a sifter for like $18 at one of the big box stores. The solid pan fits perfectly in my tote. I still have to disinfect the big tote, but not as often as I do the inside pans. Overall, it is less cumbersome. By mreynolds [1]] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ An Irishman's wife calls the doctor, stating that her husband has taken ill. The doctor asks if she had taken his temperature; she replied that she hadn't but would and then call back. When she hadn't called within a half hour, the doctor called and asked her what had happened. She said, "Well, I didn't have a thermometer, so I put a barometer on his chest and it said dry, so I gave him a pint of beer and he went off to work!" ___________________________________________________

360 frying pan dance
____________________________________________________ The Burgess Hill Town Council in the UK, in response to a worker's complaint that sunlight coming through the window caused a glare on her computer screen, has already had three meetings, six months of discussion, contact with several contractors, produced a six page report, worked up five potential alternatives, their favorite being the spending of up to $10,000 to put computer controlled screens on the outside of the window or coat the window with reflective film, but whose Town Clerk has decided to solve the problem by moving the desk away from the window. ____________________________________________________
Tales and pictures of feral children.....so sad.

Today, October 11, in
1776 During the American Revolution the first naval battle 
 of Lake Champlain was fought. The forces under Gen. Benedict 
 Arnold suffered heavy losses. 
1811 The Juliana, the first steam-powered ferryboat, was put 
 into operation by the inventor John Stevens. The ferry went 
 between New York City, NY, and Hoboken, NJ. 
1869 Thomas Edison filed for a patent on his first invention. 
 The electric machine was used for counting votes for the 
 U.S. Congress, however the Congress did not buy it. 
 because there was no way to rig it for cheating. 
1881 David Henderson Houston patented the first roll film 
 for cameras. 
1899 The Boer War began in South Africa between the British 
 and the Boers of the Transvaal and Orange Free State. 
1929 JCPenney opened a store in Milford, DE, making it a 
 nationwide company with stores in all 48 states. 
1939 U.S. President Roosevelt was presented with a letter 
 from Albert Einstein that urged him to develop the U.S. 
 atomic program rapidly. 
1958 Pioneer 1, a lunar probe, was launched by the U.S. 
 The probe did not reach its destination and fell back to 
 Earth and burned up in the atmosphere. 
1968 Apollo 7 was launched by the U.S. The first manned 
 Apollo mission was the first in which live television 
 broadcasts were received from orbit. Wally Schirra, 
 Don Fulton Eisele and R. Walter Cunningham were the 
 astronauts aboard. 
1983 The last hand-cranked telephones in the U.S. went 
 out of service. The 440 telephone customers of Bryant 
 Pond, ME, were switched to direct-dial service. 
1984 American Kathryn D. Sullivan became the first female 
 astronaut to space walk. She was aboard Challenger. 
1994 U.S. troops in Haiti took control of the National Palace. 
1994 Iraqi troops began moving away from the Kuwaiti border. 
1994 The Colorado Supreme Court declared that the anti-gay 
 rights measure in the state was unconstitutional. 
2015  smiled.


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FireFox and/or Chrome 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Saturday, October 10

Thank you, Elizabeth!!


After yesterday's uncomplimentary remarks about IE,
by sheer coincidence, of course,
FaceBook blocked me. They claimed that DearWebby was not
my real name. 
DearWebby has been my name a lot longer than FaceBook
has been theirs!

It's just a minor nuisance. Considering the source, it really
is not a big deal. I rarely spend more than 5 minutes per
day on FB, and the number of FB friends are only about 1/6
of the Humor Letter readers, if that. 

You can still get to my FB page with old links, so it really
is not a big deal.

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Florida car thief arrested for driving stolen car to police station Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 9, in More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ Seeing a murder on television... can help work off one's antagonisms. And if you haven't any antagonisms, the commercials will give you some. --- Alfred Hitchcock (1899 - 1980) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Two Venusians are walking down the street. One Venusian finds a little mirror, looks in it, again, and again. Puzzled, she says to the other one, "I just know I've seen this face before!" "Give it to me", says the other Venusian. She looks in the mirror and says, "Of course, you silly! It's me!!" ______________________________________________________ The fourth-grade teacher had to leave the room for a few minutes. When she returned, she found the children in perfect order. Everybody was sitting absolutely quiet. She was shocked and stunned and said, "I've never seen anything like it before. This is wonderful. But, please tell me, what came over all of you? Why are you so well behaved and quiet?" Finally, after much urging, spoke up and said, "Well, one time you said that if you ever came back and found us quiet, you would drop dead." ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Noella for this picture: No, she did not go out onto the porch to take that picture! ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Carnell Eugene Butler 18, St. Petersburg, Florida
Florida car thief arrested for driving stolen car to police station Authorities say an 18-year-old man drove a stolen car to police headquarters to pick up court papers about a previous auto theft he was involved in — documents that were found in yet another stolen car. Carnell Eugene Butler now faces charges in three stolen car cases. St. Petersburg police say officers found a stolen Infiniti on Sunday. Inside, they found Butler's documents related to a June auto theft arrest. Detectives contacted Butler, who arranged to pick them up. When he arrived at police headquarters, a detective arrested Butler and found keys to a Hyundai Sonata in his pocket. The car was located a block away. It, too, had been reported stolen. Butler is held without bond.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Dani Re: Firefox and/or Chrome Good Morning Webby, I see in today's Webby tips that you suggest using Chrome, or at least FireFox. I am using FireFox. Do you think Chrome is better than FireFox? If I install Chrome, should I remove FireFox or keep it as a back up? Thanks for all you do to help us. Dani Dear Dani You can have both FireFox AND Chrome running side by side. Personally, I prefer Chrome, but sometimes I use both Chrome and Firefox side by side to compare how a new design appears on different browsers. Usually they are quite consistent these days. There is no need to get rid of one. Unlike IE, those two are both quite secure. DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Two good Catholic boys passed an Episcopalian minister. At the sight of the reversed collar, one of them automatically said, "Hello, Father." The other boy elbowed him in the ribs. "He's no father, you dummy," said the second youth, "He's married and got three kids!" ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Store Duck Tape in Baggies I use duct tape for many of my crafts and with cats, I constantly am picking off hair from the edge of the tape roll. I also find that when I put it away in my storage box it sticks to everything. To solve both of these issues I have started storing the rolls in plastic baggies. I use both sandwich (holds 1 roll) and gallon (holds 4 rolls) sized bags. By lalala... [696] By the way, it's DUCK tape, not duct tape. The name comes from DUCK Weave, a square weave strip as used for the Egyptian mummies and countless applications since then. Hospital tape is one of the better known ones, and so is Duck Tape. A Duck weave tape always tears straight across, never lengthwise like Fiber Tape. Duck tape of course is also used for taping ducts, where the workers appreciate that it tears straight across and never lengthwise. There have been lots of arguments and even lawsuits about duck versus duct. The fact is, though, it has been called duck tape for a lot longer than there have been ducts. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ The most remarkable thing about Ernie's wife is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found. ___________________________________________________

360 cockpit video Swiss airforce goofing around
____________________________________________________ Patient: Doctor, if I give up wine, women, and song, will I live longer? Doctor: Not really. It will just seem longer. ____________________________________________________
What an interesting world we live in. September's National Geographic photo highlights.

Today, October 10, in
1845 The United States Naval Academy opened in Annapolis, MD.
1865 The billiard ball was patented by John Wesley Hyatt. 
1887 Thomas Edison organized the Edison Phonograph Company. 
1911 China's Manchu dynasty was overthrown by revolutionaries 
 under Sun Yat-sen. 
1913 U.S. President Woodrow Wilson triggered the explosion of 
 the Gamboa Dike that ended the construction of the Panama Canal. 
1933 Dreft, the first synthetic detergent, went on sale. 
1938 Nazi Germany completed its return of Czechoslovakia's 
 Sudetenland. 
1943 Chaing Kai-shek took the oath of office as the president 
 of China. 
1957 U.S. President Dwight D. Eisenhower apologized to Komla 
 Agbeli Gbdemah, the finance minister of Ghana, after the 
 official had been refused service in a Dover, DE, restaurant. 
1959 Pan American World Airways announced the beginning of the 
 first global airline service. 
1963 A dam burst in Italy killing 3,000 people. 
1965 The Red Baron made his first appearance in the "Peanuts" 
 comic strip. 
1973 Fiji became independent after of nearly a century of 
 British rule. 
1987 Tom McClean finished rowing across the Atlantic Ocean. 
 He set the record at 54 days and 18 hours. 
1991 The United States cut all foreign aid to Haiti in 
 reaction to a military coup that forced President 
 Jean-Claude Aristide into exile. 
1994 Iraq announced it was withdrawing its forces from the 
 Kuwaiti border. No signs of a pullback were observed. 
1997 The Guggenheim Museum in Bilbao, Spain, opened to the 
 public. 
2003 Rush Limbaugh annouced that he was addicted to painkillers 
 and that he was going to check into a rehab center. 
2010 In China, Canton Tower opened to the public. 
2015  smiled.


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IE malfunction 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Friday, October 9
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!


Thank you Michael!!!!!
Thanks, Neil!
Thanks, Ron!

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Missouri intruder arrested for sleeping in an unused bedroom Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 9, in 1855 Isaac Singer patented the sewing machine motor. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness. --- Friedrich Nietzsche (1844 - 1900) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Caller to a travel agency: "I want to go from Chicago to Bison, New York." The agent was at a loss for words. Finally, the agent replied: "Are you sure that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the customer. After some searching, the agent came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Bison anywhere." The customer retorted, "Oh don't be silly. Everyone knows where it is. I got 2 cousins there! Check your map!" The agent scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, "Do you by any chance mean Buffalo ?" The customer replied: "That's close enough." ______________________________________________________ New Yorkers are a breed apart. A man was mugged but had no cash. Afraid he'd be hurt, he offered to write the guy a check. The mugger said dumbfounded, "A Check ? Why would I take a check from you ? I don't even know you !" ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Gregory Trent Cole 53, WENTZVILLE, Mo.
Partially-clothed intruder found sleeping in child's unused bedroom A 53-year-old man has been charged with burglary and harassment after he was found asleep in an empty bedroom of someone else's Missouri home. The St. Louis Post-Dispatch reports Gregory Trent Cole was charged Monday. Authorities say Cole entered a home in the St. Louis suburb of Wentzville and went into a bedroom early Sunday while the people who lived in the home were in another room. They say he removed some of his clothes and went to sleep. Police say the man was discovered around 8 a.m., wearing only underwear and a shirt. Cole was taken to the St. Charles County Jail, where he is jailed on $15,000 bond.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Ginger Re: IE malfunction Dear Webby Ctrl/Alt/up arrow worked to get the screen right side up. Now I'm getting a message when I try to sign in with Internet Explorer: "There is a problem with this website's security certificate" no matter what site I try to sign in to.... any idea what's going on? Thank you, Ginger Dear Ginger Internet Exploder is obsolete, and not secure enough. Dump it. Use Chrome, or at least FireFox. I have not used Internet Exploder for many years and have no idea how to fix it's problems. Good Luck! DearWebby Thanks Webby - I DID switch to Chrome and it's working fine. Glad we have you for a resource person! Ginger _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ was leaving the office at 6 p.m. when the CEO was standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand. "Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document, and my secretary has left. Can you make this thing work?" "Certainly," said. turned the shredder on, and with a flourish bowed out of the way. As the CEO inserted the paper, the motor inside whirred to live and pulled the paper in. "Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the machine. "I just need one copy." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Treating Dry Cracked Heels A major cause of dry cracked heels in women comes after menopause. Hormonal changes are a major culprit. All of our glands are changing. The oil glands slow down oil production. There isn't much you can do except for diligent care. There are a few excellent exfoliate files made especially for feet. Pumice stones work for the younger crowd, but not for us. Cheap Dollar Store foot scrapers don't work. Go to a beauty supply and get a good brand foot exfoliater and foot cream. Diligence is the major key to keeping your heels soft like they were in your teens. It is possible. Make it a nightly regime; file (exfoliate) and cream every night! By hopeful [27] The same happens with men too, especially if they are getting close to heart or diabetes problems. I found best for getting rid of dry calloused skin on the feet and elbows, yes, it affects them too, is the flexible sanding mesh sold for gyprock (sheet rock, drywall) work. It is a flexible mesh, that does not clog up or build up. Just shake it when done, and it is clean again, ready for next time. You can get it at Home Depot and similar places for $3 - $5 for a pack of 5. Keep one, give away the rest. After sanding I use a little dab of baby oil. Not as fancy on the outside of the bottle, but does the job quite nicely. Just once a week is enough for me now. No more cracked and painfully infected heels, but soft and flexible skin. If you got thick and hard callouses, that have started to crack and the cracks "swallow" sock lint and infect, you should go to a pedicurist to clean out the cracks and glue them. Believe it or not, when the cracks are cleaned out and disinfected, they can be glued shut with crazy glue. That allows them to heal in record time. However, a weekly sanding and oiling should become a habit, once that excessive skin growth on heels and soles, and elbows, has started. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Benny Cohen was pulled out of the ocean by a lifeguard. His wife ran over sobbing, "Benny! Benny, what happened?!" "Madam, please don't get hysterical," said the lifeguard. "I'm just going to give your husband some artificial respiration and he'll be fine." "What!" Mrs. Cohen yelled. "My Benny gets either real respiration or nothing." ___________________________________________________

Asi se crea un mosaico pieza a pieza Personally, I think this is so cool! All the handwork involved.
____________________________________________________ "If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up," said the sarcastic teacher. After a long silence, one freshman rose to his feet. "Now then , why do you consider yourself an idiot?" inquired the teacher with a sneer. "Well, actually I don't," said the student, "but I hate to see you standing all by yourself." ____________________________________________________ 1... Avoid alliteration. Always. 2... Prepositions are not words to end sentences with. 3... Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat.) 4... Employ the vernacular. 5... Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc. 6... Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary. 7... It is wrong to ever split an infinitive. 8... Contractions aren't necessary 9... Foreign words and phrases are not apropos. 10.. One should never generalize. 11.. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said: "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know." 12.. Comparisons are as bad as cliches. 13.. Don't be redundant; don't use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous. 14.. Profanity sucks. 15.. Be more or less specific. 16.. Understatement is always best. 17.. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement. 18.. One-word sentences? Eliminate. 19.. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake. 20.. The passive voice is to be avoided. 21.. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms. 22.. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed. 23.. Who needs rhetorical questions? ____________________________________________________
Sculptures by Lorenzo Quinn, son of Actor Anthony Quinn.

Today, October 9, in
1635 Roger Williams, founder of Rhode Island, was banished 
 from Massachusetts because he had spoken out against 
 punishments for religious offenses and giving away land 
 that belonged to the Indians. Williams had founded 
 Providence, Rhode Island as a place for people to seek 
 religious freedom. 
1701 The Collegiate School of Connecticut was chartered 
 in New Haven. The name was later changed to Yale. 
1776 A group of Spanish missionaries settled in what is 
 now San Francisco, CA. 
1781 The last major battle of the American Revolutionary 
 War took place in Yorktown, VA. The American forces, led 
 by George Washington, defeated the British troops under 
 Lord Cornwallis. 
1812 During the War of 1812 American forces captured two 
 British brigs, the Detroit and the Caledonia. 
1855 Isaac Singer patented the sewing machine motor. 
1855 Joshua C. Stoddard received a patent for his calliope. 
1858 Mail service via stagecoach between San Francisco, CA, 
 and St. Louis, MO, began. 
1872 Aaron Montgomery started his mail order business with 
 the delivery of the first mail order catalog. The firm later 
 became Montgomery Wards. 
1876 Alexander Graham Bell and Thomas Watson made their 
 longest telephone call to date. It was a distance of two miles. 
1914 During World War I, German forces captured Antwerp, Belgium. 
1919 The Cincinnati Reds won the World Series. The win would be 
 later tainted when 8 Chicago White Sox were charged with 
 throwing the game. The incident became known as the 
 "Black Sox" scandal. 
1935 "Cavalcade of America" was first broadcast on CBS radio. 
1936 The first generator at Hoover Dam began transmitting 
 electricity to Los Angeles, CA. 
1940 St. Paul's Cathedral in London was bombed by the Nazis. 
 The dome was unharmed in the bombing. 
1946 "The Iceman Cometh" opened in New York City, NY. 
1946 The first electric blanket went on sale in Petersburg, VA. 
1975 Andrei Sakharov was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. The 
 Soviet scientist is known as the "father of the hydrogen bomb." 
1989 The official Soviet news agency Tass reported an UFO. 
 The report included a trio of tall aliens that had visited 
 the city of Voronzh. 
1994 The U.S. sent troops and warships to the Persian Gulf in 
 response to Saddam Hussein sending thousands of troops and 
 hundreds of tanks toward the Kuwaiti border. 
1995 Saboteurs tinkered with a stretch of railroad track in 
 Arizona. An Amtrak train derailed killing one and injuring 
 a hundred. 
2000 Brett Hull (Dallas Stars) scored his 611th National 
 Hockey League (NHL) goal. The goal allowed him to pass his 
 father, Bobby Hull, on the all time scoring list bringing 
 him to number 9. 
2003 Britain's Queen Elizabeth II knighted Roger Moore and made 
 Sting a CBE (Commander of the British Empire). 
2009 NASA launched the Lunar Crater Observation and Sensing 
 Satellite (LCROSS). On November 13, it was announced that water 
 had been discovered in the planned impact plume on the moon. 
2015  smiled.


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Scamware infection 




Good Morning, ,
Today is Thursday, October 8

>From Neil
Here is an online file converter that will handle many 
types of files, not just video
http://www.fileminx.com/
Neil

Thanks, Neil!


I had scrimped to save towards winter tires and had enough
for half of one tire in the jar. But such was not to be.
Got nailed by the cops.
Some woman was texting or doing something, that caused her 
to swerve and change speeds, so I decided to pass her at 
the earliest opportunity, and let her have her accident 
somewhere behind me.

No problem, I thought. When there was a break in the traffic
in the other lane, I stomped on the gas, passed her and was 
back in my lane long before there was traffic on the other 
lane.

Unfortunately, a cop was the second car in that lane, and
he saw his opportunity to be nasty to a good guy.
Apparently, at the moment I passed the SUV, I was briefly
going 30 over the speed limit.

It used to be that just for a second for passing it was 
OK to go over the speed limit. Apparently not, when I am 
the victim. That sure put a big damper on my mood.
No winter tires, and no Christmas this year.

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a California 'Maxi Pad Bandit' Arrested Despite Fiendishly Clever Disguise Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 7, in 1918 U.S. Corporal Alvin C. York almost single-handedly killed 25 German soldiers and captured 132 in the Argonne Forest in France. York had originally tried to avoid being drafted as a conscientious objector. After this event his was promoted to sergeant and was awarded the Congressional Medal of Honor. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ One thing life has taught me: if you are interested, you never have to look for new interests. They come to you. When you are genuinely interested in one thing, it will always lead to something else. --- Eleanor Roosevelt (1884 - 1962) There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you. --- Will Rogers (1879 - 1935) Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish. --- Euripides (484 - 406 BC) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Q. The truth of the matter is that you are not an unbiased, objective witness, isn't it. You too were shot in the fracas? A. No, sir. I was shot midway between the fracas and the navel. ______________________________________________________ A police car pulls up in front of grandma Bessie's house, and grandpa gets out. The polite policeman explained that this elderly gentleman said that he was lost in the park...and couldn't find his way home. "Leroy!", said grandma, "You've been going to that park for years! How could you get lost?" Leaning close to grandma, so that the policeman couldn't hear, he whispered, "I wasn't lost.....I was just too tired to walk home." ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Gary Victor 51, Victorville, California
'Maxi Pad Bandit' Arrested Despite Fiendishly Clever Disguise Who was that "maxied" man? A man accused of robbing an auto parts store in Apple Valley, California, has been arrested despite disguising his face by strategically putting a maxi pad over his eyes. Surveillance video, taken around 6:40 p.m. on Sept. 28, shows a man with a feminine hygiene taped on his head, using a piece of wood to break the glass front door of a Battery Mart and slip inside the store, according to Victor Valley News. The suspect stole several battery chargers and flashlights before fleeing the scene in a white 1992 Dodge Dynasty. When Battery Mart owner Mark Wedell saw the video, he immediately noticed something about the burglar. “Right away everybody started saying we should call this guy the maxi pad bandit,” Wedell told NBC Los Angeles. “We had a pretty good picture of his face 'cause he came to the store the first time and looked in the window without his maxi pad on.” “But when he came back and he had the maxi pad over his eyes, I guess he thought it was going to take care of everything." Investigators for the San Bernardino Sheriff's Dept. had no problem seeing through the fiendishly clever disguise and quickly arrested their sanitary suspect, 51-year-old Gary Victor. "It wasn't surprising, but yes, that is, in fact, that's what he was trying to conceal his identity with, and he didn't do a very good job," police spokeswoman Trish Hill said, according to UPI. Victor was arrested and taken into custody on suspicion of burglary and possessing stolen property. The stolen items were returned to Battery Mart, according to the Victorville Daily Press. The maxi pad was recovered and taken into evidence, Hill told HuffPost. Victor is a convicted felon with an extensive history of run-ins with the law, according to the Victor Valley News.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Ed Re: Scamware Dear Webby Hi. Your letter has helped me out of so many binds. Thank you. I just got a virus on my computer that I can't handle. I think I heard about this type on your letter not too long ago. It has shut down everything that I want to use. Pretty much my whole operating system, and put a bunch of programs on my computer. Then it tells me my computer has been rendered useless for safety and I should call an 877 number for assistance. I have run virus scans in safe mode, but the virus cannot be found. And I can not get rid of it. Any help or advice would be much appreciated. I am fearful I will have to take the computer in to a shop to get rid of it as it is the worst virus I have ever seen. Thanks Ed Dear Ed I guess you don't have McAfee. You MIGHT be able to install it, but many of those viruses block it. Try getting it via http://webby.com/mac You might be able to sneak it onto the machine via that route. If it doesn't get rid of the scamware, chat their support. They can get onto your machine and do miracles there. Don't worry about your porn collection. Those guys have seen bigger ones, and are not interested in anything except fixing as many machines per day as possible. You have to have a current account with McAfee, though. Without that, they can't help you. Good Luck! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ A guide is showing a Texan the Niagara Falls. "I'll bet you don't have anything like that in Texas!" "Nope, I reckon we don't," said the Texan. "But we've got plumbers who could fix it." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Easy No-Peel Applesauce How to make an easy, cheap, quick applesauce for Fall! Approximate Time: 4 Hours Yield: 10-12 servings Ingredients: 20 assorted apples 1/2 cup brown sugar 2 Tbsp cinnamon 1 cup water Steps: Choose 20 assorted apples. Break off stems. Core and cut all apples. Add apples, water, cinnamon and sugar to crock pot. Simmer on low heat for four hours. Mash apples in crock pot after four hours. Puree' applesauce in food processor. Enjoy! By GRAPE [8] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ My neighbor works in the operations department in the central office of a large bank. Employees in the field call him when they have problems with their computers. One night he got a call from a woman in one of the branch banks who had this question: "I've got smoke coming from the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a fire downtown?" ___________________________________________________

safety truck
____________________________________________________ The drunk was brought into night court, having been picked up on suspicion of being the notorious night prowler. "What were you doing out at 3 A.M.?" the judge sternly queried. "I was going to a lecture." "A lecture at 3 A.M.?" The judge was scornful. "Oh, schure," said the drunk. "Schometimes my wife schtarts 'em even later than that." ____________________________________________________
What a magnificent horse!

Today, October 8, in
1895 The Berliner Gramophone Company was founded in 
 Philadelphia, PA. 
1915 During World War I, the Battle of Loos concluded. 
1918 U.S. Corporal Alvin C. York almost single-handedly 
 killed 25 German soldiers and captured 132 in the 
 Argonne Forest in France. York had originally tried 
 to avoid being drafted as a conscientious objector. After 
 this event his was promoted to sergeant and was awarded 
 the Congressional Medal of Honor. 
1919 The first transcontinental air race in the U.S. began. 
1945 U.S. President Truman announced that only Britain and 
 Canada would be given the secret to the atomic bomb. 
1950 U.N. forces crossed into North Korea from South Korea. 
1952 "The Complete Book of Etiquette" was published for the 
 first time. 
1966 The U.S. Government declared that LSD was a dangerous 
 and an illegal substance. 
1970 Soviet author Alexander Solzhenitsyn won the Nobel Prize 
 for literature. 
1981 U.S. President Reagan greeted former Presidents Carter, 
 Ford and Nixon to the White House. The group was preparing to 
 leave for Egypt to attend the funeral of Anwar Sadat. 
1982 In Poland, all labor organizations, including Solidarity, 
 were banned. 
1991 A slave burial site was found by construction workers in 
 lower Manhattan. The "Negro Burial Ground" had been closed in 
 1790. Over a dozen skeletons were found. 
1993 The U.S. government issued a report absolving the FBI of 
 any wrongdoing in its final assault in Waco, TX, on the Branch 
 Davidian compound. The fire that ended the siege killed as 
 many as 85 people. 
1998 Taliban forces attacked Iranian border posts. Iran said 
 that three border posts were destroyed before the Taliban 
 forces were forced to retreat. The Taliban of Afghanistan 
 denied the event occurred. 
1998 Canada and Netherlands were voted into the U.N. 
 Security Council. 
2001 Tom Ridge, former Governor of Pennsylvania, was sworn in 
 as director of the new U.S. department of Homeland Security. 
2001 Two Russian cosmonauts made the first spacewalk to be conducted 
 outside of the international space station without a shuttle present. 
2002 A federal judge approved U.S. President George W. Bush's request 
 to reopen West Coast ports, to end a caustic 10-day labor lockout. 
 The lockout was costing the U.S. economy an estimated $1 billion to 
 $2 billion a day. 
2003 China announced that it would have a human crew orbit the Earth 
 briefly on October 15. 
2003 Vietnam and the United States reached a tentative agreement that 
 would allow the first commercial flights between the two countries 
 since the end of the Vietnam War. 
2003 It was announced that Vivendi Universal and General Electric Co. 
 had reached an agreement to merge. The name for the combined company 
 was NBC Universal. 
2003 Siegfried Fischbacher and his manager announced that the 
 "Siegfried and Roy" show at the Mirage was canceled permanently. It 
 was also said that if Roy Horn survived, after a tiger attack on 
 October 3, the duo would continue to work together. 
2004 The first-ever direct presidential elections were held in Afghanistan. 
2015  smiled.


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Another video converter 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Wednesday, October 7

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Florida woman, who stole boyfriend's false teeth, prescription drugs Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 7, in 1913 For the first time, Henry Ford's entire Highland Park automobile factory was run on a continuously moving assembly line when the chassis was added to the process. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ He who wonders discovers that this in itself is wonder. --- M. C. Escher (1898 - 1972) "Everybody wants to be somebody; nobody wants to grow." --- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Frustrated at always being corrected by her husband, Gina decided the next time it happened, she would have a comeback. That moment finally arrived, and she was ready. "You know," she challenged, "even a broken clock is right once a day." Leroy looked at her and replied, "Twice a day." ______________________________________________________ An aged farmer and his wife were leaning against the edge of their pig-pen when the old woman wistfully recalled that the next week would mark their golden wedding anniversary. "Let's have a party, Homer," she suggested. "Let's kill a pig." The farmer scratched his grizzled head. "Gee, Ethel," he finally answered, "I don't see why the pig should take the blame for something that happened fifty years ago." ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Noella for this picture: ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

Thanks to Noella for reporting this bonehead! An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Felicity Leigh Palma 44, Port St. Lucie, Florida
Florida woman stole boyfriend's false teeth, prescription drugs A woman in Port St. Lucie was arrested Thursday after allegedly stealing her boyfriend's prescription drugs and filing a false police report because he had upset her, police said. According to authorities, Felicity Leigh Palma, 44, called police to report a burglary in progress in the 4000 block of SE Bonney Street Thursday evening. She told the officers she saw "two dudes" running from her home, and that her jewelry and money had been stolen, an arrest report said. Palma's boyfriend told police that two of his prescription drugs and a pink case containing false teeth were missing. As police were investigating, her boyfriend brought over a bag to police that he had found inside Palma's car and dumped the contents onto a table, the report said. Out spilled the pink case containing his false teeth. Palma became defense and stated that he was trying to frame her, the report said. Police then noticed the missing prescription drug bottles belonging to her boyfriend inside a purse Palma was carrying. Palma told police that she fabricated the entire incident because she was mad at her boyfriend and wanted to show him how easy it would be for someone to steal from him, the report said. She was booked into the the St. Lucie County Jail.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Tony Re: Another Video converter Dear Webby LOVE your newsletter and look forward to reading it regularly! You've helped me with several problems I've had and also make sure I didn't create a few more. LOL (I think this is only my 2nd time replying to a reader's question) Darcy was asking about a good video converter program. I've been using Format Factory (http://www.pcfreetime.com) for MANY years. Not only is it a great video converter it's also a great converter for audio files, photos and just about everything anyone would need to convert the format on... (and it's also my favorite price: FREE!) Tony Thanks Tony! Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Shoes are required to eat in the cafeteria. Underneath in hand writing: Socks can eat any place they want. ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Line Dry Jeans Inside Out I love hanging our clothes outside to dry, but don't like stiff jeans. My late mother-in-law taught me to turn them inside out when I hung them on the clothes line. They end up soft and wrinkle free. It also helps to slow down the fading of the jeans. By Mary [2] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Captain - "How did you attain such proficiency in bayonet thrusting?" Private - "Reaching for steak at our boarding house." ___________________________________________________

flutes
____________________________________________________ Junior was one of those holy terrors and dad was quite surprised when his wife suggested that they buy him a bike for his birthday. "Do you really believe that'll help improve his behavior ?" he asked. "Well, yes," she said, "it will be a lot more peaceful INSIDE the house." ____________________________________________________
It takes a lot of talent to paint on feathers. I especially like the owls and the bluebirds.

Today, October 7, in
1765 Nine American colonies sent a total of 28 delegates to 
 New York City for the Stamp Act Congress. The delegates 
 adopted the "Declaration of Rights and Grievances." 
1777 During the American Revolution the second Battle of 
 Saratoga began. 
1868 Cornell University was inaugurated in Ithaca, NY. 
1913 For the first time, Henry Ford's entire Highland Park 
 automobile factory was run on a continuously moving 
 assembly line when the chassis was added to the process. 
1918 The Georgia Tech football team defeated Cumberland 
 College 222-0. Georgia Tech carried the ball 978 yards 
 and never threw a pass. 
1949 The German Democratic Republic (East Germany) was formed. 
1950 The U.S.-led U.N. forces crossed the 38th parallel and 
 entered North Korea. China in November proved their threat 
 to enter the war by sending several hundred thousand troops 
 over the border into North Korea. 
1963 U.S. President Kennedy signed a nuclear test ban treaty 
 with Britain and the Soviet Union. 
1981 The Egyptian parliament, after the assassination of 
 Anwar Sadat, named Vice President Hosni Mubarak the next 
 president of Egypt. 
1985 The United States announced that it would no longer 
 automatically comply with World Court decisions. 
1989 In Budapest, Hungary's Communist Party renounced Marxism 
 in favor of democratic socialism. 
1993 U.S. President Clinton sent more troops, heavy armor, 
 and naval firepower to Somalia. 
1994 U.S. President Clinton dispatched an aircraft carrier 
 to the Persian Gulf when Iraqi troops were spotted moving 
 toward Kuwait. The U.S. Army was also put on alert. 
1998 The U.S. government filed an antitrust suit that 
 alleged Visa and MasterCard inhibit competition by 
 preventing banks from offering other cards. 
1999 American Home Products Corp. agreed to pay up to 
 $4.83 billion to settle claims that the fen-phen diet 
 drug caused dangerous problems with heart valves. 
2001 The U.S. and Great Britain began airstrikes in 
 Afghanistan in response to that state's support of 
 terrorism and Osama bin Laden. The act was the first 
 military action taken in response to the terrorist 
 attacks on the U.S. on September 11, 2001. 
2003 In California, Arnold Schwarzenegger was elected 
 governor in the recall election of Governor Gray Davis. 
2015  smiled.


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Safe video converter 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Monday, October 5

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Shoplifter charged after he whined about his store mugshot Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 6, in 1683 The first Mennonites arrived in America aboard the Concord. The German and Dutch families settled in an area that is now a neighborhood in Philadelphia, PA. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ You are not superior just because you see the world in an odious light. --- Vicomte de Chateaubriand (1768 - 1848) The price one pays for pursuing any profession or calling is an intimate knowledge of its ugly side. --- James Baldwin (1924 - 1987) Any word you have to hunt for in a thesaurus is the wrong word. There are no exceptions to this rule. --- Stephen King (1947 - ) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Psychology was tried on a difficult hiccough case. All simple remedies had failed and the physician, knowing that his patient was an old tightwad, resorted to a stratagem. He administered a new, cheap medicine. This drew from the patient an inquiry as to its contents. "Chiefly musk," said the doctor. "But isn't that the expensive stuff they use in perfumes?" "Yes," said the doctor. "Each dose of this costs thirty dollars." The hiccoughs immediately stopped. ______________________________________________________ A mother was anxiously awaiting her daughter's plane. She had just come back from a far away land trying to find adventure. As the daughter was exiting the plane, the mother noticed a man directly behind her daughter dressed in feathers with exotic markings all over his body and carrying a shrunken head. The daughter introduced this man as her new husband. The mother gasped in disbelief and disappointment and screamed, "Oy vey! I said for you to marry a Rich Doctor! A RRRRRRich Doctor!" ______________________________________________________ Thanks to dad for this picture: These bloomed today. ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

Thanks to Noella for reporting this bonehead! An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Nicholas Allegretto, 23, Cambridge, England
Shoplifter charged after he whined about his mugshot The incident: A store posted a picture online of a man whom they'd caught shoplifting. The appropriate response: Not shoplifting if you're not comfortable with that type of exposure. The actual response: He complained to police that his human rights were being violated. 23-year-old Nicholas Allegretto attempted to steal a magnet from Mackays, a hardware store in Cambridge, England. He was caught outside the store and made to give the magnet back. He then ran away. After the incident, the owner of the store took a screencap of Allegretto from the security camera footage and sent it to the local newspaper to print. Speaking to the Daily Mail, store owner Neil Mackay, said, "[We were] basically saying to him: 'We know who you are, our staff knows who you are, you're not very welcome, thank you very much indeed. We'd rather you didn't come in the store." The image was also posted on social media. According to Mackay, Allegretto then went to the local police station to complain that his "human rights were being abused." The Cambridge News reports that Allegretto told police he had lost his job as a roofer and his sister had been bullied at school as a result of the image's publication. "The police decided they had enough evidence once they looked at the CCTV images to prosecute, and that's what they've done," said Mackay. Allegretto was charged with theft. He was supposed to appear in court on Wednesday, but didn't show up. He was found guilty in his absence. "I suppose you could say he wasn't the sharpest tool in the box," said Mackay. Which is a funny thing for him to say, because he owns a tool shop.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Darcy Re: Video converter Dear Webby I have to convert MOV video to MP4. A friend suggested I use Miro, but that outfit seems to have taken the money and ran far away. Their download is straight malware and no browser will allow it. Their support is totally phony too. ConvertMovToAvi is a dud too. It produces a black MP4 file. DUH! Do you know of any, that are actually working and safe to download? Thanks Darcy Dear Darcy I checked and tried a bunch. MIRO is definitely a 'has-been'. Luckily all the browsers protect you from that crap. Miro 'support' seems to be the malware producers and are not interested at all in being told that their downloads are malware. Eventually I did find a good one: AnyVideoConverter. Their entrance at http://www.any-video-converter.com/ is a bit confusing. Here is a link straight to their FREE Download: AnyVideoConverter Download AnyVideoConverter works fine for me. You c an go back to their main entrance and see whate else they have, that might be useful for you. They have all kinds of fancy stuff, for example for ripping Netflix or rented movies to DVD. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Little Johnny's mother asked him, "Why did you get such a low grade on that test?" "Because of an absence," he replied. "You mean you were absent on the day of the test?" she questioned. Little Johnny replied, "No, but the kid who normally sits next to me was." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Super Duper De-Greaser Now you finally have something useful you can make with all those annoying little soap slivers. You don't have to throw them out anymore, make an all purpose kitchen cleaner! With a few minutes and virtually no cost, you can have a bottle full of de-greaser ready to go. Re-duce, re-use, go green! :) Approximate Time: 20 minutes Yield: 22 ounces Supplies: 1/4 cup finely chopped soap slivers 1 Tbsp borax 2 3/4 cup water empty spray bottle funnel Steps: As you can see, I opted for intact fingers and chose to chop the soap with a knife. The pieces are just too small. :) Add 1 cup of water to a pot. Add your soap. Stir continuously with a fork or whisk over medium/high heat until soap is dissolved. This should take about 5 minutes. Soap soup, smells really clean! Add this mixture to your bottle. Add the borax. Add remaining 1 3/4 cups water. Replace top and gently tilt back and forth to combine. Make a new label so you know what it is. :) All set! Great for grimy stoves, oven hoods, microwaves, etc. Source: Modified from an idea in a book called Make It By melissa [199] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ A patient, while recovering in the hospital from a heart attack, met this over-zealous evangelist. After listening politely for a over a half hour on how thankful he should be to have been spared, and how he should repent at once, he asked if all of his sins had flashed before his eyes during the heart attack. The patient responded, "Don't be ridiculous, the attack had only lasted 6 hours." ___________________________________________________

Lee Marvin sings - manstyle
____________________________________________________ A well worn dollar bill and a similarly distressed twenty arrived at the bureau of Engraving and Printing to be retired. As they moved along the conveyor belt to the shredder they struck up a conversation. The twenty reminisced about its travels all over the country. "I've had a pretty good life." the twenty proclaimed. "I've been to Las Vegas and Atlantic City, the finest restaurants in New York, performances on Broadway, and even a cruise from Miami." "Wow!" said the single, "you really have gotten around." "So tell me", says the twenty, "where have you been throughout your lifetime?" "Oh, I've been to the Methodist Church, the Baptist Church, the Presbyterian Church, the Lutheran Church, the Catholic Church, the Orthodox Church, Assembly of God Church, the Brethren Church, the United Church of Christ, ...." The twenty says, "What's a church?" ____________________________________________________
What beautiful scenes of animals and nature.

Today, October 6, in
1683 The first Mennonites arrived in America aboard the Concord. 
 The German and Dutch families settled in an area that is now a 
 neighborhood in Philadelphia, PA. 
1848 The steamboat SS California left New York Harbor for San 
 Francisco via Cape Horn. The steamboat service arrived on 
 February 28, 1849. The trip took 4 months and 21 days. 
1866 The Reno Brothers pulled the first train robbery in 
 America near Seymour, IN. The got away with $10,000. 
1880 The National League kicked the Cincinnati Reds out for 
 selling beer. 
1884 The Naval War College was established in Newport, RI. 
1889 In Paris, the Moulin Rouge opened its doors to the 
 public for the first time. 
1889 The Kinescope was exhibited by Thomas Edison. He had 
 patented the moving picture machine in 1887. 
1890 Polygamy was outlawed by the Mormon Church. 
1928 War-torn China was reunited under the Nationalist 
 leader Chiang Kai-Shek. 
1939 Adolf Hitler denied any intention to wage war against 
 Britain and France in an address to Reichstag. 
1949 U.S. president Harry Truman signed the Mutual Defense 
 Assistance Act. The act provided $1.3 billion in the form 
 of military aid to NATO countries. 
1961 U.S. president John F. Kennedy advised American families 
 to build or buy bomb shelters to protect them in the event 
 of a nuclear exchange with the Soviet Union. 
1973 Egypt and Syria attacked Israel in an attempt to win 
 back territory that had been lost in the third Arab-Israel 
 war. Support for Israel led to a devastating oil embargo 
 against many nations including the U.S. and Great Britain 
 on October 17, 1973. The war lasted 2 weeks. 
1979 Pope John Paul II became the first pontiff to visit the 
 White House. 
1991 Elizabeth Taylor married Larry Fortensky. The ceremony 
 was held at Michael Jackson's estate near Los Angeles, CA. 
 It was Taylor's 8th marriage and Fortensky's 3rd. 
2015  smiled.


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No Word-Wrap in some emails 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Monday, October 5

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Floriduh paddy-wagon inmate kicked other woman in face after victim farted near her Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 3, in 1919 Enzo Ferrari debuted in his first race. He later founded the Auto Avio Construzioni Ferrari, an independent manufacturing company. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ The best doctor in the world is the veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter- he's got to just know. --- Will Rogers (1879 - 1935) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ On a recent flight, an elderly passenger kept peering out the window. Since it was totally dark, all she could see was the blinking wing-tip light. Finally, she rang for the flight attendant. "I'm sorry to bother you," she said, "but I think you should inform the pilot that he left his left-turn indicator on and seems to have forgotten about it." ______________________________________________________ GROANER ALERT: What disease can you get from kissing birds? Chirpies! (A canarial disease, but it's untweetable.) ______________________________________________________ Thanks to dad for this picture: These too bloomed today. They are in the lean-to against the side of the house. You see the stucko of the house. The walls and top of the lean-to are hollow, 1/2 inch thick greenhouse plastic, that is now about a dozen years old, but still keeps the weather out and the warmth in. Because the palstic is getting old and milky, shadows and contrast are muted, but the cacti still look great. ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

Thanks to Noella for reporting this bonehead! An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Jeanelle Callahan, 48, Clearwater, Florida
Floriduh paddy-wagon inmate kicked other woman in face after victim farted near her As she was being transported to jail, a Florida woman became “irate” and kicked another female detainee in the face after the victim “‘farted’ near her,” police allege. Jeanelle Callahan, 48, was busted Thursday afternoon after she punched her male roommate in the face, according to an arrest affidavit. Callahan, who was reportedly “highly intoxicated,” left the man with a bloody nose. Following that misdemeanor collar, Callahan was placed into a jail transport, where she encountered Virginia Turner, 60, who had been arrested for trespassing. Both women were handcuffed in the police vehicle. En route to the county lockup, “the suspect claimed that Virginia Turner ‘farted’ near her,” reported Officer Stephen Zulauf. Callahan became “irate” and attempted to strike Turner in the face with her elbow. Callahan then “raised her right leg and kicked Virginia Turner’s right side of her face.” Turner did not fight back during the attack, which was recorded by the vehicle’s camera system. Callahan, who was already facing a battery rap for punching her roomie, was hit with a second battery count for attacking Turner. She is locked up in the county jail on $1000 bond. Turner was released from custody Friday afternoon.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Darrel Re: Bad email format Dear Webby About 75% of the mails I receive are formatted nincely, with the text flowing and word wrapping properly, when I narrow or widen the window, but the other 25% the lines stretch endlessly to the right and are impossible to read. It is worst when those mails contain a copied text or forward. What causes that? Darrel Dear Darrel Would my guess be correct that a quarter of your mail comes from AOLers? There is probably nothing you can do to get them to send mail properly formatted. About all you can do is hit REPLY. Then YOUR email program will properly line-wrap it and make their mail readable. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ A man appears at a woman's front door and announces, "Madam, I'm the piano tuner." "I didn't send for a tuner," the piano-playing woman replies. "I know, lady," the man says. "Your neighbor did." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Yogurt as a Substitute for Butter I've had great success baking with no-fat, plain yogurt instead of butter. Baking powder biscuits, spice cake, bread, muffins; everything's turned out great thus far. Butter isn't necessarily bad for us. I remember my grandfather slathering it on his toast and he lived to be a ripe old age. On the other hand, he was a farmer and worked very hard physically. Few of us put out that kind of effort on a daily basis. By Rose Anne Hutchence [6] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ An enormously wealthy 65-year-old man falls in love with a woman in her 20s and is contemplating a proposal. "Do you think she'd marry me if I tell her I'm 45?" he asks a friend. "With her, your chances are better," says the friend, "if you tell her you're 90 and have a heart condition." ___________________________________________________

Anastasia Petrik ( 9 years old) from Ukraine
____________________________________________________ A lawyer was cross-examining a witness: "You have just testified that you heard the shot at exactly 11:32 p.m.? How did you know what time it was? Did you look at your watch?" "No," the witness said. "I looked at the sundial in the garden." "That's absurd," screamed the lawyer. "How could you tell time by a sundial at 11:32 at night?" "I had a flashlight," the witness said. ____________________________________________________
Twenty-one things you need in your dream home. I like the stair cases and slides.

Today, October 5, in
1813 Chief Tecumseh of the Shawnee Indians was killed at 
 the Battle of Thames when American forced defeated the 
 British and the allied Indian warriors. 
1877 Chief Joseph of the Nez Perce Indians surrendered to 
 the U.S. Army after a 1,000-mile retreat towards the 
 Canadian border. 
1919 Enzo Ferrari debuted in his first race. He later 
 founded the Auto Avio Construzioni Ferrari, an 
 independent manufacturing company. 
1930 Laura Ingalls became the first woman to make a 
 transcontinental airplane flight. 
1931 Clyde Pangborn and Hugh Herndon landed in Washington 
 after flying non-stop across the Pacific Ocean. The 
 flight originated in Japan and took about 41 hours. 
1937 U.S. President Roosevelt called for a "quarantine" 
 of aggressor nations. 
1947 U.S. President Harry S Truman held the first televised 
 presidential address from the White House. The subject was 
 the current international food crisis. 
1969 A Cuban defector landed a Soviet-made MiG-17 at 
 Homestead Air Force Base in Florida. The plane entered 
 U.S. air space and landed without being detected. 
1969 "Monty Python's Flying Circus" debuted on BBC television. 
1970 Anwar Sadat took office as President of Egypt replacing 
 Gamal Abdel Nassar. Sadat was assassinated in 1981. 
1974 American David Kunst completed the first journey around 
 the world on foot. It took four years and 21 pairs of shoes. 
 He crossed four continents and walked 14,450 miles. 
1985 An Egyptian policeman went on a shooting rampage at a 
 Sinai beach. Seven Israeli tourists were killed. The policeman 
 died in prison the following January of an apparent suicide. 
1986 Sandinista soldiers captured American Eugene Hasenfus 
 after shooting him down over southern Nicaragua. 
1991 Soviet President Mikhail S. Gorbachev announced that his 
 country would cut its nuclear arsenal in response to the arms 
 reduction that was initiated by U.S. President George Bush. 
1993 China set off an underground nuclear explosion. 
1995 A 60-day cease-fire was agreed upon by Bonsian combatants. 
 The civil war had lasted 3 1/2 years. 
1998 The U.S. paid $60 million for Russia's research time on 
 the international space station to keep the cash-strapped 
 Russian space agency afloat. 
1999 MCI Worldcom Inc. and Sprint Corp. announced plans to merge. 
2006 Walmart rolled out its $4 generic drug program to the 
 entire state of Florida after a successful test in the 
 Tampa area. 
2015  smiled.


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Email with no line wrap 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Sunday, October 4

We got snow this morning.
Gullible Warming is now definitely over. 
The "Ice Age Is Coming" scare mongering has now officially 
started.
It's still your fault. 
The grant recipients pretending to be scientists, will shortly 
adjust the theories, so that they can continue to get 
Government grants. 

Taxes will have to be increased to cope with you causing
Gullible Cooling and the glaciers galloping down into the 
valleys.

For the short term invest in snow shovels.
For the long term invest in bikinis. There will be another
Gullible Warming period in about 25 years. 
The cycles are unbroken.

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a PA burglar arrested while wearing same old Superman t-shirt Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 3, in More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ I'm tired of all this nonsense about beauty being only skin-deep. That's deep enough. What do you want, an adorable pancreas? --- Jean Kerr [Actually, the complete expression is: Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes to the bone.] Cabbage: A familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a man's head. --- Ambrose Bierce (1842 - 1914) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Mary and her new boyfriend were at her son's volleyball game when she noticed an adult couple in the bleachers. They were being VERY affectionate. She was running her hands all over him and nibbling on his ear. He had a hand on her chest. Mary said to her boyfriend, "I don't know whether to watch them or the game." He said, "Watch THEM! You already KNOW how to play volleyball." ______________________________________________________ During a sermon the pastor stated that money wasn't important in the afterlife, because in heaven, there is no money. One parishioner loudly stage-whispered to his wife, "Did you hear that, Maude? We're already in heaven." ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

Thanks to Noella for reporting this bonehead! An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Kyree Henneghan, 18, Upper Darby, Pennsylvania
PA burglar arrested while wearing same old Superman t-shirt Police in the Philadelphia suburbs say the Man of Steal was undone by his Superman T-shirt. The Philadelphia Daily News (http://bit.ly/1j2FlJO ) reports 18-year-old Kyree Henneghan was charged with two Upper Darby burglaries that police linked him to because of the shirt. Police Superintendent Michael Chitwood says a man wearing a T-shirt with the Superman shield broke into one home on Sept. 24 and a second on Tuesday. In that heist, the homeowner walked in and Henneghan bolted with a laptop computer. Henneghen made a not-so-speedy getaway on his BMX bicycle and police found him a short time later — still wearing the Superman shirt — trying to sell the computer to men in a car.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Darrel Re: Bad email format Dear Webby About 75% of the mails I receive are formatted nincely, with the text flowing and word wrapping properly, when I narrow or widen the window, but the other 25% the lines stretch endlessly to the right and are impossible to read. It is worst when those mails contain a copied text or forward. What causes that? Darrel Dear Darrel Would my guess be correct that a quarter of your mail comes from AOLers? There is probably nothing you can do to get them to send mail properly formatted. About all you can do is hit REPLY. Then YOUR email program will properly line-wrap it and make their mail readable. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Kathrina was visiting the modern art museum and turned to an attendant standing nearby. "This," she sneered, "I suppose, is one of those hideous representations you call modern art?" "No madam," replied the attendant. "That one's called a mirror." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Yummiest Microwave Omelet I have been seeing the "Plastic Bag Omelet" on many websites lately. That may be a great idea when you need to make an omelet whilst camping. You only have a pot of boiling water and 20 minutes, but it's my personal choice not to boil my foods in plastics. If you are looking to make an omelet without oil or butter and only have a few minutes, this microwave omelet is your answer! Approximate Time: 4 minutes Yield: 1 large omelet Ingredients: 3 eggs 1 clove garlic salt & pepper to taste 1/4 cup onion, diced 1/4 cup bell pepper, diced 1/4 cup cheese 1 Tbsp salsa Steps: Crack eggs into a medium/large microwaveable bowl and whisk. Grate in a clove of garlic. Season with salt and pepper. Mix well. Drop in remaining ingredients. Mix well. Microwave on high for 2 minutes. The edges will have begun to solidify. The middle will be slightly runny. Give the middle a gentle stir with a fork. Microwave on high for 1 minute. Run a knife or small spatula along the sides of omelet to lift off bowl until you get under it. It will slide right off into your serving plate. Garnish if desired. Enjoy! By attosa [123] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ PUN WARNING: At a church meeting the topic was "Burial or Cremation?" Two of the people got rather worked up. One said to the other, "If you have yourself cremated, all you will be doing is making an ash of yourself!" The other replied, "Well, I'm told that petroleum comes from fossilized bones, so if you have yourself buried all you will be doing is making a fuel of yourself!" ___________________________________________________

dogs are happy to talk about their day, except when . . .
____________________________________________________ An elderly widow and widower were dating for about five years. The man finally decided to ask her to marry. She immediately said "yes". The next morning when he awoke, he couldn't remember what her answer was! "Was she happy? I think so, wait, no, she looked at me funny..." After about an hour of trying to remember to no avail, he got on the telephone and gave her a call. Embarrassed, he admitted that he didn't remember her answer to the marriage proposal. "Oh", she said, "I'm so glad you called. I remembered saying 'yes' to someone, but I couldn't remember who it was." ____________________________________________________
I wouldn't even walk this trail let alone ride a motorcycle over it!

Today, October 4, in
1535 The first complete English translation of the Bible was 
 printed in Zurich, Switzerland. 
1648 The first volunteer fire department was established in 
 New York by Peter Stuyvesant. 
1777 At Germantown, PA, Patriot forces and British forces 
 both suffer heavy losses in battle. The battle was seen as 
 British victory, which actually served as a moral boost 
 to the Americans. 
1876 The Agricultural and Mechanical College of Texas 
 formally dedicated by Texas Gov. Richard Coke. 
1881 Edward Leveaux received a patent for the player piano. 
1909 The first airship race in the U.S. took place in 
 St. Louis, MO. 
1915 The Dinosaur National Monument was established. The 
 area covered part of Utah and Colorado. 
1927 The first actual work of carving began on Mount Rushmore. 
1931 The comic strip "Dick Tracy" made its debut in the Detroit 
 Daily Mirror. The strip was created by Chester Gould. 
1933 "Esquire" magazine was published for the first time. 
1940 Adolf Hitler and Benito Mussolini met in the Alps at Brenner 
 Pass. Hitler was seeking help from Italy to fight the British. 
1948 The Railroad Hour" debuted on ABC radio. 
1957 The Soviet Union launched Sputnik I into orbit around the 
 Earth. Sputnik was the first manmade satellite to enter space. 
 Sputnik I fell out of orbit on January 4, 1958. 
1958 British Overseas Airways Corporation became the first jetliner 
 to offer trans-Atlantic service to passengers with flights between 
 London, England and New York. 
1981 Bruce Jenner and Harry Belafonte debuted in their first 
 dramatic roles in NBC-TV's "Grambling's White Tiger". 
1987 NFL owners used replacement personnel to play games despite 
 the player's strike. 
1990 The German parliament had its first meeting since reunification. 
1992 The 16-year civil war in Mozambique ended. 
1993 Russian Vice-President Alexander Rutskoi and Chairman Ruslan 
 Khasbulatov surrendered to Boris Yeltsin after a ten-hour tank 
 assault on the Russian White House. The two men had barricaded 
 themselves in after Yeltsin called for general elections and 
 dissolved the legislative body. 
1993 Dozens of Somalis dragged an American soldier through the 
 streets of Mogadishu. A videotape showed Michael Durant being 
 taken prisoner by Somali militants. 
1994 South African President Nelson Mandela was welcomed to the 
 White House by U.S. President Clinton. 
1998 The Vincent Van Gogh exhibit opened in Washington, DC. 
 The exhibit featured 70 paintings. 
1998 Davis Gaines performed as the Phantom in the show "Phantom 
 of the Opera" for the 2,000th time. 
2001 NATO granted the United States open access to their airfields 
 and seaports and agreed to deploy ships and early-warning radar 
 planes in the war on terrorism. 
2001 In Washington, DC, Reagan National Airport re-opened. The 
 airport had been closed since the terrorist attacks on the United 
 States on September 11, 2001. 
2004 SpaceShipOne reached an altitude of 368,000 feet. It was the 
 first privately built, manned rocket ship to fly in space twice 
 within a two week window. The ship won the Ansari X Prize of 
 $10 million dollars for their success.
2015  smiled.


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Safe download locations 




Good Morning, ,
Today is Saturday, October 3

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Floriduh woman, who was arrested after her 1 year old son drinks her liquid methadone Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 3, in 1929 The Kingdom of Serbs, Croats and Slovenes officially changed its name to the Kingdom of Yugoslavia. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ The more things change, the more they remain... insane. --- Michael Fry and T. Lewis Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't, they'd be married too. --- H. L. Mencken ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Ronnie McInnis walked into a dentist's office and asked how much it would cost to extract a wisdom tooth. "That'll be $80," the dentist said. "That's ridiculous," Ronnie spat. "Isn't there a cheaper way?" "Well," the dentist said, "if I don't use an anaesthetic, I can knock it down to $60." "That's still too expensive," the man whined. "Okay," the dentist countered, "if I save on anaesthetic and simply rip the tooth out with extraction pliers, I could probably get away with charging $20." "Nope," moaned the man. "It's still too much." "Hmmm," the dentist pondered, scratching his head. "If I let one of my students do it for the experience, I suppose I could charge you just $10." "Marvellous," the man beamed. "Could you book my wife for 5:30 next Friday, after she gets off work?" ______________________________________________________ A father, who worked away from home all week, always made a special effort with his family at the weekends. Every Sunday morning he would take his 7 year old daughter out for a drive in the car. One particular Sunday however, he had a bad cold that he really didn't feel like driving at all. Luckily, his wife came to the rescue and decided that for this Sunday she would take their daughter out. They returned just before lunch and the little girl ran upstairs to see her father. "Well" the father asked, "did you enjoy your ride with Mommy?" "Oh yes Daddy" the girl replied, "and do you know what.......we didn't see a single bastid or dingbat, 'cause Mommy was doing the dingbat stuff herself and scared them all away!" ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Noella for sending this picture of her son Charlie and his dog Cooper, taken by Melanie, her DIL in 2012 Good Dog! ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

Thanks to Noella for reporting this bonehead! An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Anna Highland, 27, Fort Myers, Floriduh
Floriduh woman arrested after her 1 year old son drinks her liquid methadone A Fort Myers toddler suffered brain damage after drinking his mother's prescription liquid methadone. A two-week investigation led to the arrest of Anna Highland for neglect of the 13-month-old, who is now in the custody of the Department of Children and Families -- along with a foster child who was also in the home. The 13-month-old is also suffering from partial blindness and is no longer able to crawl. Liquid methadone is often used to help heroin addicts because of the length of time it remains in the body. A Lee County Sheriff's Office arrest report indicates that's why Highland had the prescription. A Cape Coral doctor, Timothy Dougherty, said the drug can be deadly in children. The report says that Highland left it within reach of her son. When she found it on the ground near him, she called for her mother to come home but didn't call 911 until several hours later when the boy didn't wake from a nap. Highland paid her bond and is expected to be released from jail.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Edith Re: Safe download locations Dear Webby How can one tell if a download location is safe? And what do I do if I get a warning from McAfee? Edith Dear Edith Google for the program you want. Usually the company that makes it, has a site. That is always the best location. If a program is hosted by a mirror site, only use the mirror listed on the program maker's site. Many popular programs are also listed on dubious mirrors and locations. Avoid those. Some mirror sites, that used to be good, like for example cnet.com, are heavily contaminated and best avoided. They don't check what they host and any crook can upload contaminated garbage. Tucows is still pretty good. They check a lot of the stuff that they list. Personally, I avoid publicly hosted programs. If a company can't afford $12 per year for a domain name and $10 a month for hosting, then they can't really be any good. If you do download from a faker, and McAfee throws up the big, red "WHOA!" screen, cancel the download, and delete what you have downloaded so far. Next scan your machine. Then write down the name of the mirror or URL, that tried to sleaze bad stuff onto your machine. Keep a list of places to avoid. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ A Texan is bragging to a Rhode Islander. "In Texas," he drawls, "you can get on a train, ride all day long, and still be in Texas by nightfall." "Well", replies the Yankee, "We have some rather slow trains in Rhode Island too, but none that are THAT slow." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Dry Green Onions Inside Car I use a beer/Coke box flat that I get for free from the local store. Place the green onions (or other herbs and veggies) in the flat. Place in your car in the summer months and they dry in no time and perfectly. By Lacey K. [1] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ A little girl and her mother were out and about. The girl, out of the blue, asked her mother, "Mommy, How old are you?" The mother responded, "Honey, women don't talk about their age. You'll learn this as you get older." The girl then asked, "Mommy, how much do you weigh?" Her mother responded again, "That's another thing women don't talk about. You'll learn this, too, as you grow up." The girl still wanting to know about her mother, then fires off another question, "Mommy, Why did you and daddy get divorced?" The mother, a little annoyed by the questions, responded, "Honey, that is a subject that hurts me very much, and I don't want to talk about it now." The little girl, frustrated, sulks until she is dropped off at a friend's house to play. She consults with her girlfriend about her and her mother's conversation. The girlfriend says, "All you have to do is sneak and look at your mother's driver's license. It's just a like a report card from school. It tells you everything." Later, the little girl and her mother are out and about again. The little girl starts off with, "Mommy, Mommy, I know how old you are. I know how old you are. You're 32 years old." The mother is very shocked. She asks, "Sweetheart, how do you know that?" The little girl shrugs and says, "I just know. And I know how much you weigh. You weigh 130 pounds." "Where did you learn that?" The little girl says, "I just know. And I know why you and daddy got a divorce. You got an 'F' in sex." ___________________________________________________

competitive foursome
____________________________________________________ On a visit to Chicago, Jill was eager to visit a posh department store about a dozen blocks from their hotel. Her husband obligingly hailed a cab. They got in and he told the driver, "My wife wants to go to Neiman Marcus." The cabby looked over his shoulder at them and said, "And the gentleman? Does he want to go to the bank or the pawn shop?" ____________________________________________________
These artful three-dimensional cutouts with light behind them are so ethereal.

Today, October 3, in
1863 U.S. President Lincoln declared that the last Thursday 
 of November would be recognized as Thanksgiving Day. 
1893 The motor-driven vacuum cleaner was patented by Thurman. 
1901 The Victor Talking Machine Company was incorporated. 
 After a merger with Radio Corporation of America the company 
 became RCA-Victor. 
1906 W.T. Grant opened a 25-cent department store. 
1929 The Kingdom of Serbs, Croats and Slovenes officially 
 changed its name to the Kingdom of Yugoslavia. 
1932 Iraq was admitted into the League of Nations leading 
 Britain to terminate their mandate over the nation. Britain 
 had ruled Iraq since taking it from Turkey during World War I. 
1935 Italian forces invaded Abyssinia (now Ethiopia). 
1941 Adolf Hitler stated in a speech that Russia was "broken" 
 and they "would never rise again." 
1942 The Office of Economic Stabilization was established by 
 U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt. He also authorized 
 controls on rents, wages, salaries and farm prices. 
1944 During World War II, U.S. troops broke through the 
 Siegfried Line. 
1951 CBS-TV aired the first coast-to-coast telecast of a 
 prizefight. Dave Sands defeated Carl Olson at Soldier 
 Field in Chicago. 
1952 Britain became the third nuclear power in the world when 
 they successfully detonated their first atomic bomb. 
1955 "Captain Kangaroo" premiered on CBS-TV. 
1961 "The Dick Van Dyke Show" debuted on CBS-TV. 
1962 The Sigma VII blasted off from Cape Canaveral for a 
 nine-hour flight. 
1981 Irish Nationalists in Maze Prison in Belfast, Northern 
 Ireland called off their hunger strike. The strike had lasted 
 7 months and ten people had died. 
1988 The space shuttle Discovery landed safely after its 
 four-day mission. It was the first American shuttle mission 
 since the Challenger disaster. 
1989 East Germany suspended unrestricted travel to Czechoslovakia 
 in an effort to slow the flow of refugees to the West. 
1990 The Berlin Wall was dismantled eleven months after the borders 
 between East and West Germany were dissolved. The unification of 
 Germany ended 45 years of division. 
1990 Iraqi President Saddam Hussein made a visit to Kuwait since 
 his country had seized control of the oil-rich nation. 
1994 The headquarters of the Haitian pro-army militia was raided 
 by U.S. soldiers. 
2003 Ray Horn, of the duo "Siegfried & Roy," was attacked by a 
 tiger during a performance. Roy survived the attack after being 
 dragged offstage. The tiger, a 7-year-old male named Montecore, 
 was debuting in his first show. 
2006 North Korea announced that it would conduct a nuclear test 
 as a key step in the manufacture of atomic bombs that it viewed 
 as a deterrent against a U.S. attack. A date for the test was 
 not announced.
2015  smiled.


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Fake Open Office download 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Friday, October 2
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!


Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Floriduh woman arrested after calling 911 to report drug deal rip-off Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 2, in 1835 The first battle of the Texas Revolution took place near the Guadalupe River when American settlers defeated a Mexican cavalry unit. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ Seeing ourselves as others see us would probably confirm our worst suspicions about them. --- Franklin P. Adams (1881 - 1960) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Lissa went to see a psychiatrist about her husband (he wouldn't go with her). "Doctor, my husband, Kurt, has this problem. Almost every night now he's dreaming he's a refrigerator!" "My dear, that is not really a problem! A lot of people dream that they are somebody or something unusual..." Lissa leans forward as she softly whispers this confidence: "But you see doctor it is also a problem for me! Kurt sleeps with his mouth open and his little light keeps me awake!" ______________________________________________________ A wife says to her husband one weekend morning, "We've got such a clever dog. He brings in the daily newspapers every morning." Her husband replied, "Well, lots of dogs can do that." The wife responded, "But we've never subscribed to any papers!" ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Clyde for this picture Good parking! ______________________________________________________ A little boy runs up to his mother and shouts, "Mommy! Mommy! I want to be a drummer when I grow up!" The mother sweetly replies, "You can't do BOTH." ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

Thanks to Noella for reporting this bonehead! An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Erin Klich, 36, Fort Myers, Floriduh
Floriduh woman arrested after calling 911 to report drug deal rip-off Angered that she had been shorted in a marijuana purchase, a Florida woman dialed 911 from outside her dealer's home to report being ripped off, a miscalculation that resulted in her arrest on a pair of criminal charges. Erin Klich, 36, told a cop that she “called the police because she was buying marijuana and was shorted by the people” inside a Fort Myers home. Klich, who works for a body armor manufacturer, called 911 early Friday evening. Klich reported that she sought to purchase a seven-gram bag of marijuana for $75, according to a probable cause statement. After a Fort Myers Police Department officer arrived at the scene, Klich was again on the phone with a 911 operator. The “loud and argumentative” Klich hung up the phone at the cop’s direction, but subsequently dialed 911 again. When warned by an officer that she was misusing the emergency dispatch system, Klich refused to hang up the phone, prompting her arrest. While cops waited for a female officer to arrive at the scene to search Klich, she was placed into the rear of a police cruiser. Upon Klich’s exit from the car, officers found a “clear plastic baggy containing suspect marijuana, lodged between the seat where Klich was sitting.” The pot weighed 5.4 grams, police noted. Seen above, Klich was charged with marijuana possession and misuse of the 911 system, both misdemeanors. She was released from jail Saturday after posting $2500 bond, and is scheduled for an October 13 court appearance.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Carol Re: Fake Open office Comment: On Thursday, October 1, 2015, 04:49 PM, Carol wrote: I just tried to download Open Office. McAfee issued a warning that there are PUPs included. I told it to download anyway and got another warning about a Trojan associated with the download. I had Open Office on another computer but not on this new one. Is there really a problem in downloading this program? Thanks for sharing your knowledge with us all. Carol King Dear Carol That would depend where you download it from. If you download it from https://www.openoffice.org/ it is safe. If you get it from ANYWHERE else, it is not. McAfee was right. You ignored it and downloaded some bad shit. Uninstall it, then delete the folder where you put it in, then run a full McAfee scan, and then a scan with Malwarebytes. The bad stuff is probably hidden somewhere else, that is why you have to scan everything, but since you downloaded it from somewhere else, it is not an official copy anyway, and best to get rid of it before you install the real one. Just for fun I downloaded the newest version and installed it. McAfee had absolutely no issues with it. Good Luck! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Our business professor was lecturing about different ways to bill customers. He asked, "Who can give me an example of a system where you are billed before you actually receive your goods?" One student piped up, "Tuition!" ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Pumpkin Pancakes This time of year, there is so very much you can do with pumpkin. The scent and spices fill the house with warm aromas of wonderful baked goods. It is endless what you can do with pumpkin or pumpkin spices. Ingredients: 1/4 cup pumpkin purée 1 egg 1 cup milk 1 cup flour 1 Tbsp sugar (optional) 2 tsp baking powder 1 tsp cinnamon 1/2 tsp pumpkin pie spice 1 pinch nutmeg Steps: Whisk pumpkin and egg together until smooth. Add in remaining ingredients and whisk until smooth. Fry batches in a cast iron skillet for a tasty fall breakfast treat. Enjoy a nice fall treat treat! By Jackie H. [120] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ The teacher asked if he knows his numbers. He said, "Yes, I do. My father taught me." "Good. What comes after three?" asked the teacher. "Four," says . "What comes after six?" "Seven." "Very good," says the teacher. "Your dad did a good job. What comes after ten?" smiles and says, "A jack." ___________________________________________________

Holland's Got Talent - Almira Willihagen
____________________________________________________ A perfectionist teacher demands the very best of all of her pupils. So it is only to be expected that she would get furious when one little fellow hands in a sloppily done homework paper. "This is the worst essay it has been my misfortune to read," the woman says through clenched teeth. "It has so many mistakes. I can't understand how one person could have made all these mistakes." "It wasn't just one person," the boy replies defensively. "My mom helped me." ____________________________________________________
Wish I could dance that well!

Today, October 2, in
1492 King Henry VII of England invaded France. 
1780 British army major John Andre was hanged as a spy. 
 He was carrying information about the actions of 
 Benedict Arnold. 
1835 The first battle of the Texas Revolution took place 
 near the Guadalupe River when American settlers defeated 
 a Mexican cavalry unit. 
1836 Charles Darwin returned to England after 5 years of 
 acquiring knowledge around the world about fauna, flora, 
 wildlife and geology. He used the information to develop 
 his "theory of evolution" which he unveiled in his 1859 
 book entitled The Origin of Species by Means of Natural 
 Selection. 
1870 Rome was made the capital of Italy. 
1924 The Geneva Protocol adopted the League of Nations. 
1925 Scottish inventor John Logie Baird completed the 
 first transmission of moving images. 
1937 Warner Bros. released "Love Is on the Air." Ronald 
 Reagan made his acting debut in the motion picture. He 
 was 26 years old. 
1941 Operation Typhoon was launched by Nazi Germany. The 
 plan was an all-out offensive against Moscow. 
1944 The Nazis crushed the Warsaw Uprising. 
1947 The Federatino Internationale de l'Automobile (FIA) 
 formally established Formula One racing in Grand Prix 
 competition. 
1948 The first automobile race to use asphalt, cement and 
 dirt roads took place in Watkins Glen in New York. It was 
 the first road race in the U.S. following World War II. 
1950 "Peanuts," the comic strip created by Charles M. Schulz, 
 was published for the first time in seven newspapers. 
1958 Guinea, the French colony in West Africa, proclaimed 
 its independence. Sekou Toure was the first president of 
 the Republic of Guinea. 
1962 U.S. ports were closed to nations that allowed their 
 ships to carry arms to Cuba, ships that had docked in a 
 socialist country were prohibited from docking in the 
 United States during that voyage, and the transport of 
 U.S. goods was banned on ships owned by companies that 
 traded with Cuba. 
1988 Pakistan's Supreme Court ordered free elections. 
1989 In Leipzig, East Germany a protest took place 
 demanding the legalization of opposition groups and the 
 adoption of democratic reforms. 
1990 The Allies ceded their rights to areas they occupied 
 in Germany. 
1993 Opponents of Russian President Boris Yeltsin fought 
 police and set up burning barricades. 
1998 Hawaii sued petroleum companies, claiming state drivers 
 were overcharged by about $73 million a year in price-fixing. 
1998 About 10,000 Turkish soldiers crossed into northern Iraq 
 and attacked Kurdish rebels. 
2001 NATO, for the first time, invoked a treaty clause that 
 stated that an attack on one member is an attack on all 
 members. The act was in response to the September 11, 2001, 
 terrorist attacks in the United States. 
2015  smiled.


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How to change desktop icon size 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Thursday, October 1

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Ohio bank robbers arrested after they posed on Facebook with the cash. Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, October 1, in 1979 The United States handed control of the Canal Zone over to Panama. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ Communism doesn't work because people like to own stuff. --- Frank Zappa (1940 - 1993) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Goodman was a moderately successful stockbroker who dreamed of making the big money someday. He took his friend out for a drive, and he chose the route carefully in order to impress on him the possibilities of the brokerage business. "Look at that yacht," he said as they drove slowly past a marina. "That 96' beauty belongs to the senior partner at Merrill Lynch. That one over there 104' is owned by the head of Goldman, Sachs. And look at that huge 210' yacht out there. That's the pride and joy of the top seller at Prudential-Bache." His friend Morris was silent. Goodman turned to look at him and saw a pained look on his face. "What's the matter?" Goodman asked. "I was just wondering," Morris said. "why aren't there any customers' yachts?" ______________________________________________________ When a guy's printer began to grow faint, he called a local repair shop where a friendly man informed him that the printer probably needed only to be cleaned. Because the store charged $50 for such cleanings, he told him he might be better off reading the printer's manual and trying the job himself. Pleasantly surprised by his candor, he asked, "Does your boss know that you discourage business?" "Actually, it is my boss's idea," the employee replied sheepishly. "We usually make a LOT more money on repairs if we let people try to fix things themselves first." ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Don for this picture Peggy's Cove, NS ______________________________________________________ Two city swingers were walking in the country when one of them spotted a bug walking across the road. "What kind of bug is that?" he asked his companion. The companion leaned over and looked at the bug. "It's a Lady bug." The first man looked at the bug again, then at his friend, and said: "Man, you sure got good eyes." ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

Thanks to Noella for reporting this bonehead! An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by John Mogan, 28, and Ashley Duboe, 24, Ashville, Ohio
Ohio bank robbers arrested after they posed on Facebook with the cash. A couple arrested this week for robbing an Ohio bank had posted photos to Facebook showing them posing with stacks of cash in the days following the crime, police report. John Mogan, 28, and Ashley Duboe, 24, are charged with the August 24 robbery of a bank in Ashville, a village 20 miles south of Columbus. Investigators allege that Mogan walked into the bank and gave a note demanding money to a teller, who then handed over cash. A surveillance photo shows the hoodie-wearing robber leaving the bank with a stack of currency in his hands. Mogan is a convicted felon who was just released from prison after serving about five years for robbing a bank in Lancaster, a city 20 miles east of Ashville. A female accomplice was also arrested in connection with Mogan's July 2010 robbery of a Fairfield National Bank branch. Mogan began serving a three-year parole term immediately following his July 19 release from an Ohio state lockup. The heavily tattooed Mogan has the phrases “Loyalty’s Thin” and “Betrayal’s Thick” on opposite cheeks. Investigators allege that prior to driving Mogan to the Ashville bank, Duboe applied makeup to his face and neck to cover numerous tattoos. According to police, four days after the bank robbery, Mogan--with fans of cash in each hand--and Duboe posted a Facebook photo showing them embracing. A “selfie” posted August 31 shows Mogan with a wad of bills in his mouth. The image prompted a relative to complain that the flush Mogan “didn't hook a brother up.” Referring to the loot, Mogan replied, “That's called a McStack.” He then noted that, “I got six bands bra real shit nigga,” before adding, “I'm doing rrree=aaaaalll) good.” Other photos posted to the Facebook page shared by Mogan and Duboe show Mogan pretending that the brick of cash is a phone, as well as his lunch. Mogan and Duboe, seen in the above mug shots, have each been charged with robbery and theft, both felonies, and are locked up in lieu of $250,000 bond in the Pickaway County jail.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Marjorie Re: Desktop icon size Dear Webby How do I change the size of the icons on my desktop? I can't find any way to don that in the Control panel or anywhere. I don't want to change the resolultion. I want to keep that the way I got it. Thanks Marjorie Dear Marjorie There is probably some official and complicated method for doing that, but there is a sneaky way that ahs worked for many years: Click on an empty spot on the desktop Hold down CTRL SLOWLY roll the scroll wheel on the mouse one notch at a time away from you. That increases icon size. Turning the scroll wheel towards you while holding CTRL will shrink them. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ A missionary heard about a native who had five wives. He paid a visit to the native's hut, and sure enough there were five wives. The two men sat outside the hut and talked. The missionery said "You are violating a law of God. Man can only have one wife, so you must go and tell four of those women that they can no longer live here or consider you their husband." The native thought a few moments, then said, "I'll wait here. You tell 'em." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Use Measuring Cup to Grease Baking Pans If you are using liquid oil in your recipe such as brownies, take the measuring cup that you used to measure the oil and turn it upside down in the baking pan while you are mixing the brownies. The oil will then pool in bottom of pan. Use your fingers or wax paper to coat the pan as your directions recommend. By JackieB [1] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ [a] The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans. On the other hand, the French eat a lot of fat and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans. [c] Conclusion: Eat what you like. It's speaking English that kills you. That reminds me..... Because of the anti-smoking propaganda and restrictive laws, the percentage of the population that smokes has decreased. Now, if there was any relation between smoking and cancer, the percentage of people who get cancer should theoretically have decreased at exactly the same rate. It didn't. It INCREASED! OK, so what HAS increased at the same rate as cancer ? Taxes on tobacco products. Kinda makes you think, eh ? ___________________________________________________

biking the cliff
____________________________________________________ At a golf course, four men approached the sixteenth tee. The straight fairway ran along a road and bike path fenced off on the left. The first golfer teed off and hooked the ball in that direction. But the ball went over the fence and bounced off the bike path onto the road, where it hit the tire of a moving bus and was knocked back on to the fairway. As they all stood in silent amazement, one man finally asked him, "How on earth did you do that?" He shrugged his shoulders and said, "You have to know the bus schedule." ____________________________________________________
Fascinating baby animals in the womb.

Today, October 1, in
1569 The Duke of Norfolk was imprisoned by Britain's Queen 
 Elizabeth for trying to marry Mary the Queen of Scots. 
1800 Spain ceded the territory of Louisiana back to France. 
 Later the property would be purchased by the U.S. 
 effectively doubling its size. 
1880 Thomas Edison began the commercial production of 
 electric lamps at Edison Lamp Works in Menlo Park. 
1908 The Model T automobile was introduced by Henry Ford. 
 The purchase price of the car was $850. 
1918 Damascus was captured from the Turks during World War I 
 by a force made up of British and Arab forces. 
1936 General Francisco Franco was proclaimed the head of the 
 Spanish state. 
1938 German forces enter Czechoslovakia and seized control 
 of the Sudetenland. The Munich Pact had been signed two days 
 before. 
1940 The Pennsylvania Turnpike opened as the first toll 
 superhighway in the United States. 
1946 The International War Crimes Tribunal in Nuremberg 
 sentenced 12 Nazi officials to death. Seven others were 
 sentenced to prison terms and 3 were acquitted. 
1949 Mao Tse-tung raised the first flag of the People's 
 Republic of China when the communist forces had defeated 
 the Nationalists. The Nationalist forces fled to Taiwan. 
1962 Johnny Carson began hosting the "Tonight" show on 
 NBC-TV. He stayed with the show for 29 years. Jack Paar 
 was the previous host. 
1964 The Free Speech Movement was started at the University 
 of California at Berkeley. 
1968 "Night of the Living Dead" premiered in Pittsburgh, PA. 
1971 Walt Disney World opened in Orlando, FL. 
1972 The Chinese government approved friendly relations with 
 the United States. 
1979 The United States handed control of the Canal Zone over 
 to Panama. 
1982 EPCOT (Experimental Prototype Community of Tomorrow) Center 
 opened in Florida. The concept was planned by Walt Disney. 
1985 The PLO's headquarters in Tunisia was raided by Israeli 
 jet fighters. 
1988 Mikhail Gorbachev assumed the Soviet presidency. 
1989 The authorized Charles Schulz biography, Good Grief, 
 was published. 
1989 7,000 East Germans were welcomed into West Germany 
 after they were allowed to leave by the communist government. 
1990 U.S. President George H.W. Bush addressed the U.N. General 
 Assembly and once again condemned Iraq's takeover of Kuwait. 
1990 In Croatia, minority Serbs proclaimed autonomy. 
1991 U.S. President Bush condemned the military coup in Haiti 
 that removed President Jean-Bertrand Aristide from power. 
 U.S. economic and military aid was suspended. 
1991 The U.S. trust territory of Palau became independent. 
1992 The Strategic Arms Reduction Treaty was approved by 
 the U.S. Senate. 
1994 The U.S. and Japan avoided a trade war by reaching a 
 series of trade agreements. 
1994 The National Hockey League (NHL) team owners began a 
 lockout of the players that lasted 103 days. 
1995 Sheik Omar Abdel-Rahman and nine other defendants were 
 convicted in New York of conspiring to attack the U.S. 
 through bombings, kidnappings and assassinations. 
1996 Lucent Technologies became an independent company. 
1998 The U.S. government posted a $2.2 million reward for the 
 capture of Augustin Vasquez Mendoza. He is accused of killing 
 an undercover U.S. agent during a drug purchase in 1994. 
1999 The 50th anniversary of the founding of the Peoples 
 Republic of China was celebrated in Beijing. 
2001 San Francisco's Board of Supervisors voted unanimously 
 to ban Internet filters designed to keep pornography away 
 from children at city libraries. The board left the decision 
 up to the Library Commission to decide whether to install 
 filtering software in children's areas. A federal law in the 
 U.S. mandated the use of the filters. 
2009 In the United Arab Emirates, the exterior construction of 
 the Burj Khalifa skyscraper was completed
2015  smiled.


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How many copies of Open Office before you have to pay? 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Wednesday, September 30.

Thanks to Noella for the info about the Dallas photographer:

Here's the photographer & his web site
"Looking Up" by Mike Mezeul II
https://mikemezphotography.smugmug.com/Night-Sky/i-KpRzTb5/A
September 27 at 10:59 p.m.

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Florida man arrested for tossing 'deadly urine' at cop Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, September 30, in 1399 Henry Bolingbroke became the King of England as Henry IV. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but you have ceased to live. --- Mark Twain (1835 - 1910) The principal mark of genius is not perfection but originality, the opening of new frontiers. -- Arthur Koestler ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ A little boy was afraid of the dark. One night his mother told him to go out to the back porch and bring her the broom. The little boy turned to his mother and said, "Mama, I don't want to go out there. It's dark." The mother smiled reassuringly at her son. "You don't have to be afraid of the dark," she explained. "Jesus is out there. He'll look after you and protect you." The little boy looked at his mother real hard and asked, "Are you sure He's out there?" "Yes, I'm sure. He is everywhere, and He is always ready to help you when you need Him," she said. The little boy thought about that for a minute and then went to the back door and cracked it a little. Peering out into the darkness, he called, "Jesus? If you're out there, would you please hand me the broom?" ______________________________________________________ A New Yorker was being shown around the back country of Louisiana by his cousin. "Is it true that an alligator won't attack you if you carry a flashlight?" he asked. The cousin smirked, "Depends on how fast ya carry it." ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Nancy doesn't go to church much anymore. She's a Seventh Day Absentist. ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

Thanks to Noella for reporting this bonehead! An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Alfonsa Loftin, of West Palm Beach, 40, West Palm Beach, Floriduh
Florida man arrested for tossing 'deadly urine' at cop A Florida man is behind bars after being accused of tossing a liter of "deadly urine" at a police officer. Alfonsa Loftin, of West Palm Beach, was arrested Tuesday morning after a Palm Beach County deputy responded to a call at his house. When the officer knocked on the 40-year-old man's door, the suspect allegedly greeted him with a big splash of urine from a liter bottle, according to the Palm Beach Post. It is unclear who — or what — supplied the urine. Police are describing the pee as a "deadly weapon" because urine can cause respiratory infections or permanent bodily harm, according to the report. Loftin then barricaded himself in his house for several hours. Police tried unsuccessfully for several hours to get Loftin to surrender before they kicked a hole in his door and shot him with a stun gun. Police attempted to arrest Loftin, but the 6-foot, 3-inch, 300-pound suspect allegedly resisted by kicking, flailing and tossing more urine, according to WPBF.com. Police said Loftin threw the open one-liter bottle at deputies before grabbing a K-9 officer by the head. That is probably when they tenderized him. They don't like it at all when somebody touches their K-9. Loftin was arrested on two counts of aggravated battery on a police officer and two counts of resisting an officer with violence. He remains in the Palm Beach County Jail on $36,000 bond.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Elsinore Re: How many copies of Open Office are legal? Dear Webby How many copies of Open Office can a company have, before they have to strart paying? Elsinore Dear Elsinore One Gazillion, I think. There is no limit. Open Office uses the Open Standard and is totally free and unlimited. You can have as many copies on as many computers as you want, all networked together and/or separate. Open Office is free. Period. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ His wife phoned Abe in the office and said: "Darling, come home early, we are going to have my mother for dinner." "Good" replied Abe, "make sure she's well BBQd". ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Making Salt Clay This clay is really cool. It is way cheaper than the stuff at the hobby shops! If you add alum, it will eventually harden on its own. If not, you can bake it and you are ready to paint your project and display it. Have fun! Approximate Time: a few minutes Yield: 1 large ball Supplies: 1 1/2 cup salt 4 cups white flour 1 1/2 cup warm water, more if needed 1 tsp alum, for self hardening, optional Steps: Put your salt and flour in a large bowl. Mix well. Add your water, mix well. Turn out onto the table and this is what you should have. I added about 6 tablespoons more water. Whatever you do, add it gradually. Too much water will ruin your clay. Knead till smooth, smiley face optional. If you have added alum, simply leave your project out in the open air and it will eventually harden. If not, bake small shapes in a 300 degree F oven for 30-40 minutes, or until hard. Store unused clay in an airtight container. Source: Little Hands art book By melissa [191] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ While my son was on board the Navy carrier USS GEORGE WASHINGTON, the air wing was busy with training missions. After talking to a pilot, one air-traffic controller accidentally left his microphone on and remarked to a nearby buddy, "That guy sounded just like Elmer Fudd." The airwaves got strangely quiet as everyone listened, realizing that the pilot had also heard the comment. After about ten seconds, the pilot broke the silence by announcing, "Be vewy, vewy quiet. We awe hunting submaweenes." ___________________________________________________

ferry docking in Greece
____________________________________________________ In America the late night news used to broadcast this message: "It's 11 o'clock. Do you know where your children are? In Canada they say: "It's 11 o'clock. Do you kow where the beer is?" In England they say: "Its 11 o'clock. Do you know where your wife is? In France they say "It's 11o'clock. Do you know where your husband is?" In Afghanistan they say:" Its 11 o'clock do you know what time it is?" ____________________________________________________
These pilots are pretty awesome.

Today, Sept 30, in
1399 Henry Bolingbroke became the King of England as Henry IV. 
1777 The Congress of the United States moved to York, PA, due 
 to advancing British forces. 
1787 The Columbia left Boston and began the trip that would 
 make it the first American vessel to sail around the world. 
1846 Dr. William Morton performed a painless tooth extraction 
 after administering ether to a patient. 
1868 Spain's Queen Isabella was deposed and fled to France. 
1882 In Appleton, WI, the world's first hydroelectric power 
 plant began operating. 
1935 "The Adventures of Dick Tracey" debuted on Mutual Radio Network. 
1935 "Porgy and Bess" premiered in Boston. 
1938 The Munich Conference ended with a decision to appease Adolf Hitler. Britain, and France allowed Czechoslovakia's German speaking 
 Sudetenland to be annexed by the Nazis and returned to Germany. 
1946 An international military tribunal in Nuremberg, Germany, 
 found 22 top Nazi leaders guilty of war crimes. 
1949 The Berlin Airlift came to an end. The airlift had taken 
 2.3 million tons of food into the western sector despite the 
 Soviet blockade. 
1951 "The Red Skelton Show" debuted on NBC-TV. 
1954 The U.S. Navy commissioned the Nautilus submarine at 
 Groton, CT. It was the first atomic-powered vessel. The 
 submarine had been launched on January 21, 1954. 
1963 The Soviet Union publicly declared itself on the side 
 of India in their dispute with Pakistan over Kashmir. 
1966 Albert Speer and Baldur von Schirach were released at 
 midnight from Spandau prison after completing their 
 20-year sentences. Speer was the Nazi minister of armaments 
 and von Schirach was the founder of Hitler Youth. 
1971 A committee of nine people was organized to investigate 
 the prison riot at Attica, NY. 10 hostages and 32 prisoners 
 were killed when National Guardsmen stormed the prison on 
 September 13, 1971. 
1976 California enacted the Natural Death Act of California. 
 The law was the first example of right-to-die legislation 
 in the U.S. 
1980 Israel issued its new currency, the shekel, to replace 
 the pound. 
1983 The first AH-64 Apache attack helicopter was rolled 
 out by McDonnell Douglas Helicopter Company. 
1982 "Cheers" began an 11-year run on NBC-TV. 
1989 Thousands of East Germans began emigrating under an 
 accord between the NATO nations and the Soviet Union. 
1989 Non-Communist Cambodian guerrillas claimed that they 
 had captured 3 towns and 10 other positions from the r
 esiding government forces. 
1990 The Soviet Union and South Korea opened diplomatic relations. 
1991 Haiti's first freely elected president, Jean-Bertrand 
 Aristide, was overthrown by Brigadier General Raoul Cedras. 
 Aristide was later returned to power. 
1992 Moscow banks distributed privatization vouchers aimed at 
 turning millions of Russians into capitalists. 
1993 U.S. chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff Colin Powell 
 retired. 
1994 The space shuttle Endeavor took off on an 11-day mission. 
 Part of the mission was to use a radar instrument to map remote 
 areas of the Earth. 
1997 France's Roman Catholic Church apologized for its silence 
 during the persecution and deportation of Jews the pro-Nazi 
 Vichy regime. 
1999 In Tokaimura, Japan, radiation escaped a nuclear facility 
 after workers accidentally set off an uncontrolled nuclear 
 chain reaction. 
2014 Amazon filed for a patent for a UAV (unmanned aerial 
 vehicle) configured to autonomously deliver items to customers. 
 The patent was related to Amazon's plan for their Prime Air 
 service. 
2015  smiled.


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How to revert Skype from 7 to a better version 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Tuesday, September 29.

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Pennsylvania girl, 16, who doused school guards with gasoline, then tried to set them on fire Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, September 29, in 1962 U.S. President John F. Kennedy nationalized the Mississippi National guard in response to city officials defying federal court orders. The orders had been to enroll James Meredith at the University of Mississippi. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ If you can find something everyone agrees on, it's wrong. --- Mo Udall ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ The Manhattan Commuter train was packed. Suddenly there was a jingle on the floor. Most necks were craned. One elderly gentleman, however, bent down and picked something up. He then asked, "Did anyone drop a half dollar?" "I did," answered three men at once. "Well," said the elderly gent with a smile, "here's a dime of it." ______________________________________________________ >From Lillemor For those of my older generation (like me) who do not really comprehend the need for Facebook: Presently, I am trying to make friends outside of Facebook while applying the same principles. Therefore, every day I walk down the street and tell the passers-by what I have eaten, how I feel, what I have done the night before, and what I will do tomorrow. Then, I give them pictures of my family, my dog, me gardening, and spending time in my pool. I also listen to their conversations, and I tell them I love them. And, it works. I already have three persons following me ... two police officers and a psychiatrist ______________________________________________________ Tim Durkan Photography From Tim: It's been a long but exciting night that I'm just getting home from! Lugging 40lbs of gear around town, months of planning and a TON of good luck weather wise finally paid off! For those interested - the photo I shared is one shot (non layered) taken on a Nikon D750 body with 200-400mm telephoto lens. I had 4 cameras, 4 lenses, 4 tripods and a VERY good assistant tonight THANK YOU Brother Paul Stevenson! Nikon And here is Dallas, sent in by SexySassySatin No name of the photographer yet. Dallas After spending 5 hours on a rooftop with an incredible view of Dallas, the photographer was able to create this composite image showing the moons transition from full moon, to full lunar eclipse, and back. Each moon image was shot approximately 10 minutes apart to capture the entire transition. Shot on a Nikon D810 #Nikon ______________________________________________________ Charlie followed the Priest before the next race. Again, the Priest went to the stables and blessed another horse. Charlie quickly put two dollars on that horse and won close to fifty bucks! The Priest kept blessing horses and Charlie kept betting on them and they won! The last race of the day was the biggest and Charlie saw the Priest with that horse, also! He quickly went to his bank and withdrew his life's savings of $20,000, went back to the racetrack and put it all on that horse! He watched the race in certain anticipation of leaving a millionaire! The horse was last to cross the line and Charlie was dead broke! He couldn't believe what happened so he went looking for the Priest. He found the man and asked, "What happened to that last horse you blessed? Because your blessing didn't work, I've lost all of my money!" The Priest said, "That's the trouble with you Protestants. You can't tell the difference between a blessing and the Last Rites!" ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

Thanks to Noella for reporting this bonehead! An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Imani Knight-Brantley, 16, Wilkinsburg, Pennsylvania
Girl, 16, doused school guards with gasoline, then tried to set them on fire A Pennsylvania girl doused school security guards with gasoline and then attempted to light the victims on fire, according to investigators who have charged the teen with numerous felonies. In retaliation for a run-in last week with a guard, Imani Knight-Brantley, 16, returned Monday to her Pittsburgh-area high school carrying a two-liter Sprite bottle containing gasoline. According to police, Knight-Brantley was booted from Wilkinsburg High School Friday after being caught using a cell phone in class. She later returned to get food at an after-school program, but was again escorted from the building by guard Brandon Murray. As she was being removed the second time, Knight-Brantley threw a milk carton at Murray. As detailed in a criminal complaint, Knight-Brantley confronted Murray upon returning to the school Monday. Police allege that she splashed gasoline on Murray and a second security official. As the guards grappled with Knight-Brantley, she tried to ignite the gasoline with an outdoor grill lighter. After police arrived to arrest Knight-Brantley, students were evacuated due to the smell of gasoline throughout the school. According to court records, Knight-Brantley faces four counts of aggravated assault and causing or risking catastrophe, both felonies. She is also charged with misdemeanor weapons possession and reckless endangerment counts. Knight-Brantley, who has been charged as an adult, is being held in the Allegheny County jail in lieu of $100,000 bond. As seen in the above booking photo, the teen has the word “Love” tattooed on her neck. Pennsylvania law bars anyone under the age of 18 from being tattooed, unless the minor’s parent or guardian has consented to the inking and is present for the tattooing.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Annamarie Re: Skype Dear Webby I was really careful to always refuse to Update Skype to Version 7.0 after I had seen it on my daughter's computer. 7.0 stinks! But today they somehow snuck it in. I had too many tabs open on Chrome, and McAfee was doing a scan, and I had too many programs open. The machine almost crashed, and while I was frantically tryiing to close stuff, they sleazed in their update in the background. Bastids! As you may have noticed, once a Skype update has started, the bastids won't let you cancel or stop it. So I wound up with the ugly and slow 7.0 Yuck! I tried running the carefully saved 6.20 setup, but it bombed with the message that I had a newer version installed. @#$%&!!! Now what? Annamarie Dear Annamarie I found that uninstalling Skype does not mess up the history or the contact list, but it is best to save it anyway. Hit the Windows key and R to get the RUN field above the START. Type or paste: %appdata% You see a huge mess of folders and files about all kinds of programs, including Skype CTRL-drag the Skype folder onto a camera chip or removable drive, where Microsoft can't touch it. You can CTRL-drag it onto the desktop, and from there onto a save place. Once your data is safe, do the Windows key and R trick again and this type paste appwiz.cpl That gets you to Programs, Uninstall in the Control panel without mousing around. Highlight Skype, right-click and select Uninstall. It will whine a bit but eventually 7.0 will go away. Don't worry if the desktop icons will all go blank during that. They will come back. Once everything has settled down, you can run the 6.20 installation and normally all your contacts and history will come back. If they don't, copy the back-up back to where you got them from. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Amazing! Even Hillary doesn't need that many gunslingers protecting her! ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Make Your Concrete Patio Look Like Brick I painted the entire patio with a grey porch/patio paint and was not happy with the look. So I next used narrow masking tape to tape off the brick pattern. I then used a red brick color and an old paintbrush to paint the bricks (I mixed a little black acrylic paint with the red to make it look more authentic). It has worn fairly well and only needed a few touch ups each summer. I love the way my patio looks now and it sure beats the cost of installing brick pavers! By Marianne from Trenton, Ohio You can mix old-fashioned Poly-Filler into the Porch/Patio paint. It makes it less slippery when wet, and MUCH more durable. Don't use any of the soft drywall repair compunds. You need REAL Poly-Filler or Poly-Filla. You can apply it with a large puddle moover squeegee. The small ridges you might wind up with make it look even better. If some of the squeegee ridges are too high, you can sand them with a belt sander. That is when you find out that the porch-patio paint / Poly-Filler combo gets as hard as concrete. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ A store manager overheard a clerk saying to a customer, "No, ma'am, we haven't had any for quite some time now, and it doesn't look as if we'll be getting any more." Alarmed by what was being said, the manager rushed over to the customer who was walking out the door and said, "That isn't true, ma'am. Of course, we'll have some soon. In fact, I personally placed an order for them just a couple of days ago." Then the manager drew the clerk aside and growled, "Never, never, never, never say we don't have something. If we don't have it, say we ordered it and it's on its way. Now, what was it she asked if we had any?" "Rapes in the parking lot." ___________________________________________________

ferry docking in Greece
____________________________________________________ During a county-wide drive to round up all unlicensed dogs, a patrolman signaled a car to pull over to the curb. When Bubba asked why he had been stopped, the officer pointed to the big dog sitting on the seat beside him. "Does your dog have a license?" he asked. "No way," Bubba said, "Ol' Blue don't need none. He's getting too shortsighted fer doin' the drivin'." ____________________________________________________
Some of these weird history facts I didn't know.

Today, Sept 29, in
1789 A regular army was established by the U.S. War Department 
 with several hundred men. 
1829 The first public appearance by London's re-organized police 
 force was met with jeers from political opponents. The force 
 became known as Scotland Yard. 
1930 Lowell Thomas made his debut on CBS Radio. He was in the 
 radio business for the next 46 years. 
1943 U.S. Gen. Dwight D. Eisenhower and Italian Marchal Pietro 
 Badoglio signed an armistice aboard the British ship Nelson. 
1946 "The Adventures of Sam Spade" debuted on CBS Radio. 
1962 U.S. President John F. Kennedy nationalized the Mississippi 
 National guard in response to city officials defying federal 
 court orders. The orders had been to enroll James Meredith 
 at the University of Mississippi. 
1963 "My Favorite Martian" premiered on CBS-TV. 
1967 The International Monetary Fund reformed monetary systems 
 around the world. 
1977 Eva Shain became the first woman to officiate a heavyweight 
 title boxing match. About 70 million people watched Muhammad Ali 
 defeat Ernie Shavers on NBC-TV. 
1982 In Chicago, IL, seven people died after taking capsules of 
 Extra-Strength Tylenol that had been laced with cyanide. 
 264,000 bottles were recalled. 
1983 The War Powers Act was used for the first time by the U.S. 
 Congress when they authorized President Reagan to keep U.S. 
 Marines in Lebanon for 18 more months. 
1984 Irish officials announced that they had intercepted the 
 Marita Anne carrying seven tons of U.S.-purchased weapons. 
 The weapons were intended for the Irish Republican Army. 
1984 Elizabeth Taylor was voted to be the world's most 
 beautiful woman in a Louis Harris poll. Taylor was at the 
 time in the Betty Ford Clinic overcoming a weight problem. 
1988 The space shuttle Discovery took off from Cape Canaveral 
 in Florida. It was the first manned space flight since the 
 Challenger disaster. 
1990 "Millie's Book" by First Lady Barbara Bush was the 
 best-selling non-fiction book in the U.S. 
1992 Brazilian lawmakers overwhelmingly voted to impeach 
 President Fernando Collor de Mello. 
1993 Bosnia's parliament voted overwhelmingly to reject an 
 international peace plan unless Bosnian Serbs returned land 
 that had been taken by force. 
1994 The U.S. House voted to end the practice of lobbyists 
 buying meals and entertainment for members of Congress. 
2008 The Dow Industrial Average lost 777 points. It was the 
 largest one-day decline to date. The drop came after the U.S. 
 House of Representatives had voted down a $700 billion bank 
 bailout plan. 
2010 In China, Canton Tower became operational. 
2015  smiled.


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IP-TV 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Monday, September 28.

Have FUN!
DearWebby

http://webby.com/mac.html With THIS LINK you get 50% off!
Check out the 4 top versions at http://webby.com/mac There is one that even protects your phones, not just computers and tablets!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Florida man arrested for bigamy announced in church, while wife #1 was present. Details at Boneheads ______________________________________________________ Today, September 26, in 1978 Heavy fighting occurred in Lebanon between Syrian peacekeeping troops and Lebanese Christian militiamen. More of what happened on this day in history at History ______________________________________________________ The best way out is always through. --- Robert Frost (1874 - 1963) When you encounter seemingly good advice that contradicts other seemingly good advice, ignore them both. --- Al Franken, ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ One evening a man was very impressed with the meat entree his wife had served. "What did you marinate this in?" he asked. His wife immediately went into a long explanation about how much she loves him and how life wouldn't be the same without him, etc. Eventually, his puzzled expression made her interrupt her answer with a question of her own, " What did you ask me?" She chuckled at his answer and explained, "I thought you asked me if I would marry you again!" As she left the room, he called out, "Well, would you marry me again?" Without hesitation, she said, "Vinegar and barbecue sauce." ______________________________________________________ The preacher, in his Sunday sermon, used "Forgive Your Enemies" as his subject. After a long sermon, he asked how many were willing to forgive their enemies. About half held up their hands. Not satisfied, he continued on for another twenty minutes, repeating his question. This time he received a response of eighty percent. Still unsatisfied, he lectured for fifteen more minutes and repeated his question. With thoughts of Sunday dinner, all responded except one older gentleman in the rear. "Mr. Jones, are you not willing to forgive your enemies?" "I don't have any," replied Mr. Jones. "Mr. Jones, that is very unusual. How old are you?" "Eighty six," was the reply. "Mr. Jones, please come down in front and tell the congregation how a man can live to eighty six and not have an enemy in the world." The old man teetered down the aisle and slowly turned around. "It's easy. I outlived all them rotten no-good sumbeeches!" ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ At long last the good-humoured boss was compelled to call Fisk into his office. "It has not escaped my attention," he pointed out, "that every time there's a home game at the stadium you have to take your aunt to the doctor." "You know you're right, sir," exclaimed Fisk. "I didn't realize it. You don't suppose she's faking it, do you?" ______________________________________________________
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

Thanks to Noella for reporting this bonehead! An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Patrick Celicourt 49, Pine Hills, Floriduh
Florida man arrested for bigamy announced in church, while wife #1 was present. She was at church when she found out. The pastor, standing at the altar in front of everyone, announced her husband, Patrick Celicourt, had married another woman. With the congregation laughing, Mitha Plaisimond ran from the church and started researching. The 57-year-old showed up at the Orange County Sheriff's Office a few days later with copies of the old, and new marriage licenses in hand. Celicourt, 49, is now facing charges of bigamy and making false official statements, records show. He was arrested Wednesday on a warrant and booked into the Orange County Jail. He has since been released on bail. Celicourt and the other woman applied for a marriage license in March, records show. Plaisimond found out in April when the pastor announced the new marriage at the End Time Sabbath Worship Center near Pine Hills where she regularly attended. "When it became time for the announcements on the altar, they announced that my father 'Patrick Celicourt' was newly married to another woman while still being married," the couple's daughter wrote in a Sheriff's Office report. Records show the couple, originally from Haiti, had been married for more than 21 years, have children together and own a home in northwest Orange County. Plaisimond told deputies Celicourt tried to sell the house without her knowing. She had documents to prove that, too. Celicourt filed for a divorce in June, records show. Plaisimond and two of the couple's children filed domestic violence injunctions against Celicourt following the marriage announcement, but each was denied. It is unclear if the pastor knew Celicourt and Plaisimond were still married when the announcement was made.
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Eddie Re: IP-TVbox Dear Webby Hi Mr. Webby; Well I went out and bought a "Roku media box" only to see that it was just a bunch of apps that wants you to rent from them - and the so call free movies - were something back from the 50's that no one wants to see - i mean this was soooo bogus - i disconnected this and took it back the next day! Ok, so now I bought a "IP - Tv" box and hooked it up yesterday and got into it - it has a "Ubuntu OS" base system with apps - along with an android system. I like this better than that roku box - now I have a question for you - do you know how to tell what you bought (like a windows computer) - I mean in windows you can right click the monitor icon and it will tell you what the specs are - and or is there a bios in this media box? - I am new to this - so I just want to know if I got what it said! Here is the link on what I bought - IP-TV Box Eddie Dear Eddie I don't think that is computer related, and I don't have a clue about it. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ An old farmer went to town to see a movie. The ticket girl said, "Sir, what is that on your shoulder?" The old farmer said, "That is my pet rooster, Chuckie. Wherever I go, Chuckie goes." "I'm sorry, Sir," said the ticket girl, "We can't allow animals in the theater. Not even a pet chicken." The old farmer went around the corner and stuffed the chicken down his pants. He returned to the booth, bought a ticket and entered the theater. He sat down next to two old emergency room nurses named Mildred and Marge. The movie started and the chicken began to squirm. The old farmer unzipped his pants so Chuckie could stick his head out and watch the movie. "Marge," whispered Mildred. "What?" said Marge. "I think the guy next to me is a pervert." "What makes you think so?" asked Marge. "He unzipped his pants and he has his thing out," whispered Mildred. "Well, don't worry about it," said Marge, "At our age we've seen them all." "Yes," said Mildred, "But this one's eating my popcorn!" ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Save Ramen Noodle Flavor Packets I empty the packets into clean salt shakers, using each flavour separately. That way, you can use a little to add a bit of spice to many dishes. I pick up shakers at yard sales, so no extra cost! By Faye Dutkiewicz [6] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Fall camping tips: To win the race for fastest set-up on multi-family camping trips, tell your kids that NOBODY gets to go to the outhouse until all your tents are set up and the stuff moved into them. When using a public campground, a tuba placed on your picnic table will keep the campsites on either side vacant. When using a public campground, a violin or viola placed on your picnic table will mysteriously dissappear, and some nearby camp fire will burn extra hot. Wires as used for "strings" on many stringed instruments such as violas make excellent snare wire for catching rabbits, squirrels and night-time raiders of your beer cache. When smoking a fish, don't inhale. A hot rock placed in your sleeping bag will keep your feet warm. Hot enchiladas or pizzas do NOT work. After they permanently melt into your sleeping bag, you will have a permanent cold spot in that location. Lint from your navel makes a handy fire starter. Warning: Remove lint from navel before applying the match. If you set up a tent to be sheltered from the wind while ice-fishing, do NOT sleep in that tent. Somebody will get up at night and step into the hole. Extracting a foot with a sprained ankle firmly wedged into the hole in the ice tends to cause foul language that scares the fish away. If a family member has borrowed your ice auger to drill a fence post hole, it is a good idea to mark and identify that auger with a hack-saw by cutting it into little bitty pieces. That is best done cool and calm, before you carry it up to that mountain lake. Salmon eggs in little pouches made from old pantyhose work better for ice fishing than any other bait or lure, and if you don't get permission to use some bits of pantyhose, remember that salmon eggs are just deluxe caviar at one tenth the cost, and are great with devilled eggs. Building a fire in the dry spot under a tree with overhanging branches is a dumb idea, either the snow will slide off and put your fire out, or the tree will catch on fire. Putting your tent under a tree is also a bad idea, especially in the rain. A tent will shed rain, but the slow, fat drops coming from a tree will spray through and slowly dampen your sleeping bag. Also, a tree will continue to drip long after the rain has stopped. You can compress the diameter of a rolled up sleeping bag by running over it with your car. Tempting as it may be to "just-do-it", it IS considered good manners to tell your mother-in-law to get out of her sleeping bag before that procedure. ___________________________________________________

best of talking animals
____________________________________________________ A burglar went to the bank and pointed a gun on the cashier and said, "Give me all your money, or you'll be GEOGRAPHY!" The cashier laughed and said, "You mean to say HISTORY." The burglar answered, "Dangit, don't change the *subject*!" ____________________________________________________
Be careful, don't fall! 3D street art that looks so real.

Today, Sept 28, in
1066 England was invaded by William the Conqueror who claimed 
 the English throne. 
1542 San Diego, CA, was discovered by Portuguese navigator 
 Juan Rodriguez Cabrillo. 
1687 The Turks surrendered Athens to the Venetians. 
1781 During the Revolutionary War, American forces began the 
 siege on Yorktown, VA. 
1850 The U.S. Navy abolished flogging as a form of punishment. 
1850 U.S. President Millard Fillmore named Brigham Young the 
 first governor of the Utah territory. In 1857, U.S. President 
 James Buchanan removed Young from the position. 
1892 The first nighttime football game in the U.S. took place 
 under electric lights. The game was between the Mansfield State 
 Normal School and the Wyoming Seminary. 
1915 The British defeated the Turks in Mesopotamia at 
 Kut-el-Amara. 
1924 The first around-the-world flight was completed by two 
 U.S. Army planes when they landed in Seattle, WA. The trip 
 took 175 days. 
1939 During World War II, Germany and the Soviet Union agreed 
 upon a plan on the division of Poland. 
1955 The World Series was televised in color for the first time. 
 The game was between the New York Yankees and the Brooklyn Dodgers. 
1967 The first black mayor of Washington, DC, Walter Washington, 
 took office. 
1972 Communist China and Japan agreed to re-establish diplomatic 
 relations. 
1978 Heavy fighting occurred in Lebanon between Syrian 
 peacekeeping troops and Lebanese Christian militiamen. 
1978 Don Sherman, editor of Car & Driver, set a new Class E 
 record in Utah. Driving the Mazda RX7 he reached a speed of 
 183.904 mph. 
1990 The Game Boy handheld video game device was released 
 in Europe. 
1991 In response to U.S. President Bush's reduction of U.S. 
 nuclear arms Soviet President Mikhail S. Gorbachev promised 
 to reciprocate. 
1995 Yasser Arafat of the PLO and Israeli Prime Minister 
 Yitzhak Rabin signed an accord that transferred control 
 of the West Bank. 
1997 The 103rd convention of the Audio Engineering Society 
 (AES) was held in New York City, NY. The official debut of 
 the DVD format was featured. 
2000 The U.S. Federal Drug Administration approved the use 
 of RU-486 in the United States. The pill is used to induce 
 an abortion. 
2004 Nate Olive and Sarah Jones arrived at the U.S.-Mexico 
 border to complete the first known continuous hike of the 
 1,800-mile trail down the U.S. Pacific Coast. They started 
 the trek on June 8. 
2015  smiled.


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