What to do when a Windows Update changes all the fonts? 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Monday, December 31. In case you did not get yesterday's picture, it is at Bearly Cab I wish you ll the Best for the New Year! Have FUN! DearWebby
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The best minds are not in government. If any were, business would hire them away. --- Ronald Reagan A billion here, a billion there, pretty soon it adds up to real money. --- Senator Everett Dirksen
>From SaxySassySatin New Years Drinking Warning Just Released: Vodka And Ice Will Ruin Your Kidneys. Rum And Ice Will Ruin Your Liver. Whiskey And Ice Will Ruin Your Heart. Gin And Ice Will Ruin Your Brain. Pepsi And Ice Will Ruin Your Sugar Levels..... There You Have It! Ice Is Freaking Lethal! Warn All Your Friends: Lay Off The Ice, Just Drink It Straight!! You Could Save A Life!!! And Don't Forget What Ice Did To The Titanic!!! sex c sass c :)
Seven year old Johnny had finished his winter vacation and gone back to school. Two days later his teacher phoned his mother to tell her that John was misbehaving. "Wait a minute," she said. "I had Johnny here for two weeks, day and night, and I never called you once when he misbehaved."
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Chewanna Henderson, 33, Lincoln Heights, Ohio Jailed After Exposing Man To HIV Virus, Stabbing Him In The Head When He Complained Reported by The Weekly Vice Chewanna Henderson, a 33-year-old Anderson Township woman was jailed Friday after she allegedly had sex with man without telling him she was HIV positive, then stabbed him in the head to abuse him further. According to police, Henderson and the victim reportedly got into an argument after she failed to tell him that she was HIV positive until after they had sex. In retaliation, Henderson grabbed a kitchen knife from the kitchen counter and stabbed him in the back of his head. He was taken to a local hospital, where he was treated for non life-threatening injuries. When officers questioned Henderson, she stated that she didn't tell the victim that she was HIV positive because he had purchased a puppy for her and provided a place for her to stay. When deputies were booking her into jail, she took an officer's keys, slipped off her handcuffs and attempted to escape. She was stopped before reaching the door. Henderson was booked into the Hamilton County Justice Center and charged with escape, theft, and two counts of felonious assault. She is currently being held in lieu of $81,500 bond.
Tech Support Pits From: Wendy Re: Different font after Windows Update Dear Webby We were away for Christmas and I shut down the computer while away to save power etc. Came home, rebooted it, and guess what? All the fonts are changed. Email fonts changed, fonts on desktop changed, and fonts on browser changed as well. Haven't a clue what happened, and don't have a clue how to rectify it. Any suggestions? Love the newsletter, love the jokes, and love the info included in it. Cheers, Happy New Year, Wendy Dear Wendy It has never happened to me, but searching on the net showed that it seems to be a fairly common bug with Windows7 updates. As soon as you reboot after certain updates, it changes everything in Windows to a certain font, that Microsoft figures is good for cute widdle goilies like you. Do a restore to prior to the last Windows Update, and your fonts will be back. Microsoft has no bug fix for that and is still searching for somebody or something to blame. In one post they venture that possibly it has something to do with a certain anti-virus program clashing with their update. Which anti-virus program are you using? Please let me know if this mail gets through to you. Sympatico often blocks me because of all the Christmas cards sent via my servers. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Use Microwave To Refresh Masking Tape If your masking tape comes off in little pieces, zap the roll of tape in the microwave 10-20 seconds and it will work as it should. By fossil1955 from Cortez, CO Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
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The World’s Shortest Excel Book This condensed e-Book has all you need to become a relaxed and confident Excel expert, instead of a scared novice. Written in easy to understand language and without all the confusing and intimidating fillers. Excellent deal even if you use spreadsheets only occasionally. Get The World’s Shortest Excel Book now!

Since he runs a pawnshop, I decided to ask a friend of mine to appraise my grandfather's violin. "Old fiddles aren't worth much, I'm afraid," he explained. "What makes it a fiddle and not a violin?" I asked. "If you're buying it from me, it's a violin. If I'm buying it from you, it's a fiddle."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
At the counter, a woman was complaining about the departure time, saying, "Young man, I could stick a feather in my butt and get there faster." The clerk smiled and said, "Yeah, and you'd save extra time by not having to go through Security! Go for it!"
» Street Art Utopia
Sew much Comfort

Today in 
-406 80,000 Vandals attack Mainz at the Rhine
1492 100,000 Jews expelled from Sicily 
1687 1st Huguenots depart France to Cape of Good Hope 
1776 Rhode Island establishes wage & price controls to curb 
  inflation: Limit is 70¢ a day for carpenters, 42¢ for tailors 
1779 English fleet beat Dutch Merchant vessels
1783 Import of African slaves banned by all of the 
  Northern states 
1857 Queen Victoria chooses Ottawa as new capital of Canada 
1859 Dutch colony in Dutch Indies counts 4,800 slaves
1862 Union ironclad ship "Monitor" sinks off 
   Cape Hatteras NC 
1890 Ellis Island (New York NY) opens as a US immigration depot 
1896 25th auto built in US
1910 US tobacco industry produced 9 billion cigarettes in 1910 
1924 Edwin Hubble announces existence of distant galaxies
1930 US tobacco industry produced 123 billion cigarettes in 1930 
1935 Charles Darrow patents Monopoly
1938 Dr R N Harger's "drunkometer", 1st breath test, 
   introduced in Indiana 
1938 Dutch national debt hits ƒ3,986,629,805.70 
1939 Dutch national debt hits ƒ4,218,553,180.99
1940 37 U boats sunk this month (213,000 ton) 
1942 60 U boats sunk this month (330,000 ton) 
1946 French troops leave Lebanon 
1958 Cuban dictator Batista flees 
1974 Gold legal in US
1974 Popular Electronics displays Altair 8800 computer
1977 Ted Bundy escapes from jail in Colorado
1978 Taiwan's final day of diplomatic relations with the US 
1990 United Somali Congress seizes Presidential Palace 
1991 USSR, last day of existence
1992 Target date set for Europe's single market 
1994 1st snowless December in Baltimore MD 
1997 Intel cuts price of Pentium II-233 MHz 
   from $401 to $268 
1997 Microsoft buys Hotmail E-mail service
1997 More Swedes died than were born in 1997, 
   1st time since 1809 
1999 Control of Panamá Canal reverts to Panamá
2012  smiled


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Wireless Camera Chip 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Sunday, December 30. Thank you Cathi! Quite a few asked me what all this "Fiscal Cliff" BS is all about. Well, basically it is tax increases and funding cuts to pay for election campaign goodies and to pay for bills, that were due during the election campaign, but would have been inconvenient to mention at the time. So those inconvenient measures were postponed and set to happen like automatic time bombs during the next president's term. The next president could then have said, it's all Obama's fault, just like Obama claims it is all Bush's fault. Well, Obama got re-elected, and is stuck with those automatic time bombs, that will go off on January 1st, unless he figures out some really good excuse to make your great-grand-kids pay for all that stuff. The House and he Senate are playing hard to get, and uncooperative, just like they were in Bush's second term. They know that the pendulum is swinging towards the right, and they are more concerned about securing themselves a warm place to crap, than anything Obama is panicking about. All those automatically scheduled meaures don't affect them anyway, they just affect people, who are not in the Senate or the House. Those automatic time bombs were put in place a year ago. They are like a promise made to the electrical company, that if you don't pay your overdue bill by January 1, they are welcome to disconnect your electricity. It is going to hurt, but that is what the majority voted for. There is absolutely nothing you or I can do about it, except try to remember it during the next election. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us. --- Bill Watterson Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe. --- Jackie Mason
>From Patti One morning I was called to pick up my son at the school nurse's office. When I walked through the main entrance, I noticed a woman, curlers in her hair, mudpack on her face, and wearing pajamas. "Why are you dressed like that?" I asked her. "I told my son," she explained, "that if he ever did anything to embarrass me, I would embarrass him back. He was caught cutting school. So now I've come to spend the day with him!"
Company Policy Start with a cage containing five monkeys. Inside the cage, hang a banana on a string and place a set of stairs under it. Before long, a monkey will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the banana. As soon as he touches the stairs, spray all of the monkeys with cold water. After a while, another monkey makes an attempt with the same result - all the monkeys are sprayed with cold water. Pretty soon, when another monkey tries to climb the stairs, the other monkeys will try to prevent it and beat him up. Now, turn off the cold water. Remove one monkey from the cage and replace it with a new one. The new monkey sees the banana and wants to climb the stairs. To his surprise and horror, all of the other monkeys attack him. After another attempt and attack, he knows that if he tries to climb the stairs, he will be assaulted. Next, remove another of the original five monkeys and replace it with a new one. The newcomer goes to the stairs and is attacked. The previous newcomer takes part in the punishment with enthusiasm. Again, replace a third original monkey with a new one. The new one makes it to the stairs and is attacked as well. Two of the four monkeys that beat him have no idea why they were not permitted to climb the stairs, or why they are participating in the beating of the newest monkey. After replacing the fourth and fifth original monkeys, all the monkeys that have been sprayed with cold water have been replaced. Nevertheless, no monkey ever again approaches the stairs. Why not? Because as far as they know that's the way it's always been around here. And that's how company policy begins
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Amanda Rowles, 27, El Paso County, CO. Teacher Jailed for Repeatedly Having Sex With Two Male Students Reported by The Weekly Vice Amanda Rowles, a 27-year-old drama and choir teacher at Calhan High School has been jailed after she allegedly had sex with two male students. According to the El Paso County Sheriff's Office, an investigation was launched last September after Calhan School administrators advised the Sheriff's Office of a possible relationship between Rowles and a student. The investigation revealed that Rowles allegedly engaged in sexual relationships with two 17-year-old students during the 2011-2012 school year. Investigators say one student stated that he had sex with Rowles "on at least 40 occasions" over a six month period. The sexual encounters reportedly took place while Rowles and the student were hiking together or when they were at her mother's house. A second student told investigators that he pursued a relationship with Rowles after she kissed him in the classroom after school. A sexual relationship developed between Rowles and the student even after she had pushed him away at one point and acknowledged that the relationship was wrong. The student told investigators that he was "hurt" when Rowles abruptly ended their relationship and moved away. At the end of the 2011-2012 school year, Rowles resigned her position at the school and moved to the Denver area where she was arrested by the Aurora County Sheriff's Office. She was booked into the Aurora County Jail and charged with two counts each of sexual assault on a child by one in a position of trust and sexual assault/pattern of abuse. Her bond has been set at $50,000.
Tech Support Pits From: Margene Re: Wireless Camera Dear Webby You spent a lot of time answering about camera’s. There is one more option. For any camera with a memory card, you can buy an eye-fi card. They have 3 cards with varying amounts of storage. I have a picnic once a year. I take the pictures in the back yard and by the time I get in the house they are loaded on my computer. This card can go from camera to camera. Check it out at http://www.eye.fi/products, A great product. Margene Dear Margene Thank you for that info and link! Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Use Microwave To Refresh Masking Tape If your masking tape comes off in little pieces, zap the roll of tape in the microwave 10-20 seconds and it will work as it should. By fossil1955 from Cortez, CO Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
The World’s Shortest Excel Book This condensed e-Book has all you need to become a relaxed and confident Excel expert, instead of a scared novice. Written in easy to understand language and without all the confusing and intimidating fillers. Excellent deal even if you use spreadsheets only occasionally. Get The World’s Shortest Excel Book now!

A father thought it was about time to lecture his son, who was somewhat scatter-brained and frivolous. "Jim," he said, "You're getting to be a man now and you ought to take life more seriously. Just think . . . if I died all of a sudden, where would you be?" "I'd be right here, dad," said Jim. "The question is, where would YOU be?"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
On a U.S. cruiser the officer of the deck asked the starboard lookout, "What would you do if a sailor was washed overboard?" "I'd yell 'Man overboard,'" answered the lookout snappily. "Good," said the officer. "Now what would you do if an officer fell overboard?" The lookout asked, "Which one, sir?"
» Department Store Museum
Sew much Comfort

Today in 
0987 French King Hugo Capet crowns his son Robert the 
   compassionate king
1317 Pontifical decree "Sancta Romania" against spiritualists
  (Gypsy fortune tellers) 
1703 Tokyo hit by Earthquake; about 37,000 die
1835 After gold discovery in Georgia, Cherokees are forced 
to move across Mississippi River 
1853 Gadsden Purchase - 45,000 square miles (120,000 km) 
   by Gila River from México for $10 million; 
   Area is now southern Arizona & New Mexico 
1861 US, banks stops payments in gold 
1906 Iran becomes a constitutional monarchy 
1922 Soviet Union organized
1935 Italian bombers destroy Swedish Red Cross unit in Ethiopia
1936 United Auto Workers stage 1st sit-down strike
1938 Electronic television system patented by V K Zworykin
1949 India recognizes People's Republic of China
1950 Vietnam, Laos & Cambodia become Independent states 
  in France Union
1958 French franc devalued
1972 President Nixon halts bombing of North Vietnam 
   & announces peace talks 
1988 Canadian Senate OK's free trade pact; with US
1993 Vatican recognizes Israel 
2012  smiled


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Wireless cameras 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Saturday, December 29. Thank you Cathi! There seems to have been more interest in that One Click Privacy program, than all recipe and weight=loss programs combined. That is actually quite understandable. If General Petraeus had used that program, he would still have a job! Actually, even being able to prevent spouses and kids from jumping to wrong confusions, with just one click, is well worth it. And of course securing a work machine can be extremely important. Who hasn't ordered car parts or glasses or made a hair cut appointment during business hours? That is the ammo needed by somebody, who wants your job. Better to click once and be sure everything is clean and can not be used against you. Have FUN! DearWebby
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The problem with any unwritten law is that you don't know where to go to erase it. --- Glaser and Way
A study conducted by the American Psychiatric Association (ASA) today showed that over 40% of the practicing psychiatrists in the U.S. were themselves receiving psychiatric treatment of some kind. A spokeswoman for the ASA said the public should not be concerned, as the remainder were undergoing intensive drug-therapy.
The Sunday school lesson for the day was about Noah's Ark, so the preschool teacher in our Kentucky church decided to get her small pupils involved by playing a game in which they identified animals. "I'm going to describe something to you. Let's see if you can guess what it is. First: I'm furry with a bushy tail and I like to climb trees." The children looked at her blankly. "I also like to eat nuts, especially acorns." No response. This wasn't going well at all! "I'm usually brown or grey, but sometimes I can be black or red." Desperate, the teacher turned to a perky four-year-old who was usually good about coming up with the answers. "Michelle, what do you think?" Michelle looked hesitantly at her classmates and replied, "Well, I know the answer has to be Jesus -- but it sure sounds like a squirrel to me!"
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Nouel Alba, 37, Hartford, Conn. Jailed for Sandy Hook Shooting Scam, Pretending To Be Slain Victim's Aunt To Solicit Donations Nouel Alba, a 37-year-old New York woman has been jailed after she allegedly solicited donations by passing herself off as a relative of one of the Sandy Hook massacre shooting victims. According to the U.S. attorney's office, Alba used her Facebook profile, PayPal accounts, and a series of phone calls to seek "funeral" donations just hours after the the Sandy Hook school shootings took place. Alba, according to prosecutors, pretended to be the aunt of 6-year-old Noah Pozner, one of the children slain in the tragic massacre. Investigators say Alba set up a "funeral fund" claiming that she was forced to enter the Sandy Hook crime scene to identify her nephew. She is also accused of lying to FBI agents who were tasked with identifying the many charity scams related to the shooting. "We've set up a funeral fund for my brother and families," Alba wrote on her profile before adding her PayPal account information and donation instructions. In text messages with a donor, Alba allegedly stated that she met and hugged President Obama during his visit to Newtown and claimed that she was afraid to view her nephew in his casket. Alba told agents that she wasn't aware that her PayPal account was being used to solicit donations and promised to return the money immediately after it was received. Court records indicate, however, that she did not return any donations until several days later when her activities were given additional scrutiny by federal investigators. Alba told investigators that someone had stolen her identity and hacked into her Facebook and PayPal accounts to perpetrate the scam. Federal authorities, however, say Alba's transactions and related computer activity were tracked to her IP address. Alba was arraigned Thursday on a charge of lying to FBI agents. She was released after posting $50,000 bond. Another con artist that got caught is professional asshole Jonathan Lee Riches That link is to the story at The Smoking Gun.
Tech Support Pits From: Krusty Re: Wireless Camera Dear Webby HOW CAN I SEND PHOTOS TO MY COMPUTER WIRELESSLY. I NOW NEED A CAMERA THAT WILL DO THAT . CAN YOU RECOMMEND ONE. THANKS AS ALWAYS FOR YOU HELP BILL IS KRUSTY Dear Krusty Wireless, WiFi or IP cameras have been around long enough, that you can get used ones cheap on eBay. Quite often they have some external damage, for example from being placed on a car roof and forgotten. They survive the fall at the next fast curve quite nicely, but hitting the pavement at speed scratches up the case and makes it uncomfortable to hold. You can often find $300 - $400 cameras with "road-rash" for under $50. The Kodak Easy-Share has been around for about a dozen years, and is quite common. Another popular camera is the Nikon Coolpix. My own choice would be a Canon Powershot SD430 and up. I think all Canons above the SD430 have wireless, except some off the very high end SLR professional cameras. Professionals prefer to carry a bunch of 8 or 16 GB SD chips in old-fashioned film canisters stuck into a traditional carry strap like ammo in a gun belt. Canisters with a green Fuji cap are for blanks, and the ones with a black Kodak cap are for the filled ones. However, the SD430 and cameras in that range are nothing to sneeze at! Ten years ago professional photographers would have killed to lay their hands on an SD430, even though they sneer at it now. You can also check PriceGrabber, and see what you can find in brand new cameras. Quite often last year's or the previous year's models go on sale dirt cheap, because they are gathering dust. That does not mean they are bad or suffered from sitting on the shelf. Quite often the difference between a two year old camera and this year's model is just cosmetic or quite negligible. If I misunderstood you and you mean automatic, motion detector activated cameras, that email you the pictures if there is any motion, then go to X-10.com. Be prepared to have your socks blown off by the incredibly huge choice of wireless cameras. They have night vision cameras, cameras with invisible IR lights, pan, tilt and zoom by remote control, High Resolution and also low resolution to make picture transfers fast. All that James Bond stuff is surprisingly cheap. You can get a day / night wireless camera with reasonably good resolution for under $100. One of the Best $100 day/night cameras with more than 10 InfraRed lights and pan and tilt, that will email motion detector activated pictures to your smart-phone or computer, is the AirSight Night & Day. You can even control the pan and tilt from a phone or computer. Real James Bond stuff! By the way, night cameras are typically black and white, not color. They use Infra-Red to reach much further into the dark, but when you need night vision, picture quality is usually not an issue. They are not intended for contest quality sunset shots, ut for identifying trespassers. Typically cameras, that take single shots and email them, produce twenty times better quality than continuous streaming cameras, that are limited by connectivity bandwidth and have to really compress the pictures. Don't go there if you are in a hurry! Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Pack Up Christmas For New Years New Year's Christmas decorations usually make me a little sad. So this year I have decided to make a new tradition. Throughout the week between Christmas and New Year's, we are taking down some of the decorations we have throughout our home, and ceremoniously storing them away. On New Year's Eve we will slowly take down our tree, counting down as we go! This would be great for children to participate in. We obviously don't go out and party on New Year's Eve. We usually stay at home with some food trays, and watch the festivities on TV. This way, we are "prepared" for the New Year to come! By AHA! from Sterling, PA Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
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The World’s Shortest Excel Book This condensed e-Book has all you need to become a relaxed and confident Excel expert, instead of a scared novice. Written in easy to understand language and without all the confusing and intimidating fillers. Excellent deal even if you use spreadsheets only occasionally. Get The World’s Shortest Excel Book now!

Miss Figpot looked over her third grade class and happened to notice Billy and Little Johnny giggling and talking during her lesson. "Well, since you two are obviously listening so well, let's see if you can answer this one!" The teacher said with a smirk on her face. "What is the proper name to use when referring to a cow that has just given birth?" There was a moment of silence, then Little Johnny started giggling. "You think it's funny Johnny? You know the answer?" growled Miss Figpot. "Umm...yeah!" Johnny replied. "Well, let's hear it." "You would call her de-calfenated!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
A very zealous soul-winning young preacher recently came upon a farmer working in his field. Being concerned about the farmer's soul the preacher asked the man, "Are you laboring in the vineyard of the Lord, my good man? Not even looking at the preacher and continuing his work, the farmer replied, "Naw, these are soybeans." "You don't understand," said the preacher. "Are you a Christian?" With the same amount of interest as his previous answer the farmer said, "Nope my name is Jones. You must be looking for Jim Christian. He lives a mile south of here." The young determined preacher tried again asking the farmer, "Are you lost?" "Naw! I've lived here all my life," answered the farmer. "Are you prepared for the resurrection?" the frustrated preacher asked. This caught the farmer's attention and he asked, "When is it gonna be?" Thinking he had accomplished something the young preacher replied, "It could be today, tomorrow, or the next day." Taking a handkerchief from his back pocket and wiping his brow, the farmer remarked, "Well, don't mention it to my wife. She don't get out much and she'll wanna go all three days."
» Petal Perfect
Sew much Comfort

Today in 
1539 St Jacobs Church burns after being hit by lightning
1813 British burn Buffalo New York during the War of 1812 
1837 Steam-powered threshing machine patented, Winthrop ME
1848 Gas lights 1st installed at White House
1852 Emma Snodgrass arrested in Boston for wearing pants
1862 Bowling ball invented
1885 Gottlieb Daimler patents 1st motor bike (Germany) 
1891 Edison patents "transmission of signals electrically"
1920 Yugoslav government bans communist party
1930 Fred P Newton completes longest swim ever (1826 miles), 
  when he swam in the Mississippi River from Ford Dam MN, 
  to New Orleans LA 
1931 Identification of heavy water publicly announced, HC Urey 
1937 Ireland adopts constitution (Irish Free State becomes Eire) 
1940 Germany begins dropping incendiary bombs on London (WWII) 
1947 Ship carrying Jewish immigrants driven away from Palestine
1948 Canada recognizes Israel 
1949 Hungary nationalized its industries
1952 1st transistorized hearing aid offered for sale
1968 Israeli commandos destroy 13 Lebanese airplanes 
1978 Shah of Iran, asks Shapour Bahktiar to form a 
   civilian government 
1983 US announces withdrawal from UNESCO
1992 Governor Cuomo grants Jean Harris ("Scarsdale Diet" 
  Murderess) clemency. She died December 23, 2012. 
1997 Hong Kong begins slaughtering all its chickens to 
   prevent bird flu 
1997 Russia signs agreement to build a $3B nuclear power 
   plant in China
 2012  smiled


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Caution when changing Yahoo password! 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Friday, December 28. Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops! The flag counter near the bottom of the side menu will be deleted in a few days, when the paid service runs out. It was fun to watch where new subscribers came from, but times are tough, and I can't justify $30 per year for a progran, that is not generating new subscribers or has existing subscribers make any favorable comments about it, If you want it for your sites some day, copy the URL in the next few days, Have FUN! DearWebby
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There are two things that will be believed of any man whatsoever, and one of them is that he has taken to drink. --- Booth Tarkington A good relationship is like fireworks: loud, explosive, and liable to maim you if you hold on too long. --- Jeph Jacques Sure there are dishonest men in local government. But there are dishonest men in national government too. --- Richard M. Nixon
How often have we heard that television watching can be detrimental? A pastor carried that message one Sunday morning in an impassioned sermon on the evils of TV. "It steals away precious time that could be better spent on other things," he said. He advised the congregation to do what he and his family had done. "We put our TV away in the closet." "That's right," his wife muttered to the woman next to her, "but it sure gets awfully crowded in there!"
With more people traveling, the airlines seem to have more problems keeping passengers happy. At the end of one flight, however, one smiling, very satisfied fellow pauses to congratulate the flight attendant. "I want to compliment you and the crew and especially the captain for getting here right on time," he says. "It's not often anymore that an airline gets to where it's going exactly when they claim it will. I'm going to call your home office and let them know how pleased I am." "Why, thank you, sir," the flight attendant answers, "but I think you should know -- this is yesterday's flight."
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Click on the picture for the large version UFO? Or a falling star? Or a meteorite?
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Tracy Browning, 38, Louisville, Kentucky Jailed After Repeatedly Trying To Purchase iPads With Food Stamp Card, Fleeing Scene With Merchandise Tracy Browning, a 38-year-old Louisville woman, was jailed after she allegedly tried to purchase several iPads with a food stamp card, then fled to another location where she tried to make the same transaction. According to Louisville police, Browning went to the Valley Station Walmart and tried to purchase two iPads with an Electronic Benefit Transfer card. When the transaction was denied, she assaulted a store clerk, pushed another employee to the ground and fled from the store with the merchandise. Investigators say Browning went to another Walmart in the area a short time later and again attempted to buy several iPads with an EBT card. At that store they were ready for her and she was apprehended at the scene while attempting to flee with the merchandise. Browning, according to police, has been banned from all Wal-Mart locations due to prior incidents with the store. She was booked into the Louisville Metro Jail and charged with robbery, shoplifting and trespassing.
Tech Support Pits From: Walter, the Stonecarver Re: Yahoo passwords Dear Webby A friend, who is on Yahoo, found out the hard way, that Yahoo password verification can easily trash an account, along with all the mails in it. Please print this: Yahoo has changed the process that happens when you change your password. Once you change it, the first time you log on with the new password, they require not just the new password, but that you verify your identity with your secret question. When you first set up the account you create that question, or in some cases they had a popup a few years ago that asked you for one. If you forgot the answer to that question, then you are in BIG trouble. If you've set up a backup with a cell phone number that can receive sms and with an alternate non-yahoo email, you can elect to get a message there with a login code instead of using your secret word. If you've set up two secret words you'll probably only need one of those to get in, so your chances are better. So go in today, make sure you know your secret word and make sure you have a cell phone and alternate e-mail registered, or else the next time you change your password you could end up getting permanently locked out, and losing all your stored e-mails and contacts. There are thousands of people out there, who have gotten completely locked out of their accounts because of this change in the security verification system. It just took four days to get my friend back into her account after she changed her password, a real nightmare). Walter Dear Walter Thank you for your warning and advice ! Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Keep an Inventory List of Your Freezer Contents Sometimes when I have leftovers and freeze them to have as a meal for another day, they get lost in my freezer, buried by a loaf of bread or a bag of frozen chicken. One great tip I've found very useful is to make a list of what I put in my freezer and place it on the front of my refrigerator with a magnet. The list is a very helpful reminder of what I have in there and makes it easy to pull out a frozen container of stew for a fast dinner that I may have otherwise forgotten was in there! Source: Organic Gardening Magazine By Patricia from Maple Falls, WA Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

Hillary was in an accident and required immediate cosmetic surgery. So they toook off her make-up. And then they took off another layer of make-up. And another one. And another one. Working frantically for three days and nights they finally reached the skin. The next morning there was a press release: Jimmy Hoffa has been found !
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Seven year old Linda asked her mother how old she was. Her mother told her that women often keep their age a secret and changed the subject. Later that day Linda's friend Mary came over for a visit, and she told her about not getting an answer from her mother. Mary suggested to just look it up on her mother's drivers license in her purse on the table. While her mother was busy in the laundry room, they snuck a peek. Later, when mother returned, Linda bragged: "Mom, I know how tall you are! You are 5' 6"." Mother smiled and thought: "Used to be!" Then Linda said:" And I know how much you weigh! 125 punds!" Again mother smiled and thought: "Used to be!" But then Linda announced: "And you were born on February 27, 1960!" Now mother started looking concerned and wondering where Linda got all that information from. Then Linda dropped the bomb: "And I know why Daddy divorced you and left! You got an 'F' in sex!"
» Pre 50's tunes


Today in 
1065 Westminister Abbey opens in London
1732 1st known ad for "Poor Richard's Almanack" (Pennsylvania 
   Gazette) 
1828 6.8 earthquake strikes Echigo Japan, 30,000 killed 
1836 Spain recognizes independence of México 
1850 Rangoon Burma destroyed by fire 
1895 World's 1st movie theater opens in Paris 
1902 Trans-Pacific cable links Hawaii to US 
1903 Electric lamp sets fire to Iroquois theater in Chicago; 602 die 
1904 1st daily wireless weather forecasts published (London) 
1908 Messina, Italy struck by an earthquake (nearly 80,000 died) 
1931 Lin-Sen succeeds Chiang Kai-shek as President of 
   Nanjing-China 
1943 All inhabitants of Kalmukkie deported, about 70,000 killed 
1948 The IDF crosses the Egyptian border
1950 Chinese troops cross 38th Parallel, into South Korea 
1976 Winnie Mandela banished in South Africa
1984 Creosote bush determined to be 11,700 years old 
1997 Sting beats Hollywood Hogan for WCW Championship 
 2012  smiled


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Erasing your tracks 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Thursday, December 27 On Wednesday I drive to Okotoks to pick up my bread. Today the clouds lifted and there was just the low purple winter haze, and as I was driving eastwards, a near full moon slowly climbed out of and above the purple haze. Unfortunately I had no camera with me. It was quite pretty. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Be sincere; be brief; be seated. --- Franklin D. Roosevelt Behold the turtle. He makes progress only when he sticks his neck out. --- James Bryant Conant "He has a right to criticize, who has a heart to help." --- Abraham Lincoln
Doug and Bill were at the racetrack. Doug says, "You know, if you win $600 on a race, the track tells the government." Bill says, "Well it could be worse." Doug replies, "What could be worse than telling the government you won $600." Bill sighs, "Telling your wife."
A teenaged boy with spiked hair, nose ring, and baggy clothes says to his friend,"I don't really like to dress like this, but it keeps my parents from dragging me everywhere with them."
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Click on the picture for the large version
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Lynn Sarnowski, 47, of Elizaville, N.Y Woman trying to addle cop drives into home RED HOOK, N.Y. (UPI) -- A New York state woman whose car crashed through the front door of a house, nearly hitting a woman watching TV, was trying to distract police, police said. Lynn Sarnowski, 47, of Elizaville, N.Y., was charged with misdemeanor drunken driving and reckless endangerment after she drove past a Red Hook, N.Y., police officer on a winding country road at nearly 100 mph, lost control and smashed through the door of the house, narrowly missing homeowner June Lawson, Red Hook town police said. Sarnowski started driving at high speed to distract the town officer who had pulled over a friend of hers for possible drunken driving, police said. Red Hook is in the Hudson Valley about 100 miles north of New York City. Sarnowski, who had to be extricated from her car, was taken to a Poughkeepsie, N.Y., hospital, where she was charged and issued a misdemeanor drunken-driving ticket to appear in Red Hook Town Court, police said. She was later arrested and charged with two counts of reckless endangerment, the Poughkeepsie Journal reported. At the Red Hook home, Jason Lawson, who was on the second floor when the accident occurred, was injured when he fell down the stairs, not realizing they had been taken out by the car running into the house, the Kingston Daily Freeman reported. Both Lawsons declined medical attention. The operator of the vehicle originally stopped by police, Gary A. Dodge, 57, of Elizaville, was charged with two counts of felony drunken driving. He was arraigned in town court and released on his own recognizance. Lynn Sarnowski's day job is truck driver.
Tech Support Pits From: Dave Re: Cleaning my tracks Dear Webby I've used windows to automatically keep user IDs, search engine searches, passwords, etc...and now have quite a list. How do I erase these? Thanks in advance for your help. Your newsletter is the first thing we read each morning. Keep up the good work! Dave Dear Dave Try One Click Privacy With that you can secure your computer with one click. You can keep your activities 100% private with One Click Privacy Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Thank Yous That Last Take pictures of you child opening a gift for Christmas or their birthday. Print the picture out and have the child write a thank you on the back of it and send it as a Thank You to the person giving the gift. You can also sent picture in attachment in an email with thank you from child. If child is too young, you can write what they say. The expression as they open the gift is often priceless. By Southernbelleklb from Jefferson, LA Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

The math teacher saw that little wasn't paying attention in class. She called on and said, "! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?" quickly replied, "NBC, CBS, HBO and the Cartoon Network!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
The Polish were upset because of their bad reputation. A group of them got together and approached a conference of Americans, Germans, and Japanese and asked for help on this matter. An American replied, "You must do something so the world will respect you. The Japanese are known for their technology and the Germans are known for their resourcefulness. We Americans have had respect since we helped win the World War against the other two. See, you need to do something world-famous." A German added, "Yes, he's right. Why don't you find a place in this world in need of a bridge that no one has dared build, build it, come back to us, and we will help publicize it." With that, the Polish set off to build their bridge. They designed it and worked six months and finally completed it. They then went back to report it to the group. The bridge was a beautiful bridge but it had one flaw: it was erected in the middle of the Sahara Desert. An American said, "No, no. See, that is why you have your reputation. There is no need for a bridge in the middle of the desert. Now go and dismantle it, and find a more strategic spot to erect it." The Polish returned to the conference in two weeks. One of the Japanese said, "Two weeks! It only took you two weeks to dismantle that bridge and build a new one??? That is amazing!!" To which a Polish man replied, "Well, not exactly. When we returned to the bridge we couldn't dismantle it because there were all these Italians fishing off it."
» Pre 50's tunes


Today in 
1437 Albrecht II von Habsburg becomes king of Bohemia 
1503 Battle at Garigliano - Spanish army beats France 
1825 1st public railroad using steam locomotive in England 
1845 Ether 1st used in childbirth in US, Jefferson GA
1897 Stanley Cup: Montréal Victorias beat Ottawa Capitals, 15-2 
1927 Stalin's faction wins All-Union Congress in USSR, 
   Trotsky expelled 
1934 1st youth hostel in US opens (Northfield MA) 
1934 Shah of Persia declares Persia now Iran
1937 Mae West performs Adam & Eve skit that gets her 
   banned from NBC radio 
1939 1st American skimobiles (North Conway NH) 
1939 8.0 Earthquake in Erzincam Turkey, about 50,000 die 
1941 Japan bombs Manila even though it was declared 
   an "open city"  (Like Dresden later on)
1943 France transfers most of her powers in Lebanon to 
   Lebanese government 
1945 International Monetary Fund established
1979 Soviet troops invade Afghánistán, 
   President Hafizullah Amin overthrown 
1983 Propane gas fire devastated 16 square blocks 
   of Buffalo NY
1985 Terrorists kill 20 & wound 110 attacking El Al at 
   Rome & Vienna airports; President Reagan blamed 
   Libyan leader Colonel Muammar Qaddafi who had 
   no clue about it.
1988 Bulgaria stops jamming Radio Free Europe 
after more than 3 decades
 2012  smiled


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How to get rid of Caps Lock for good? 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Wednesday, December 26 Thank yiou, Rhonda! Those Chinese spiral lights seem to be depending on Gullible Warming. Alberta has apparently opted out of that hoax, so all across Alberta the spiral lights distributed by the "Porch-Liter" activists, are showing a pathetic pink glow like a baby night-light. Since that is a rather embarrassing way to greet any visitors stumbling up the porch steps.in the dark, I will replace my motion activated lights tomorrow with regular 40 Watt incandescent lightbulbs, at least until the weather warms up. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

It is better to have loved and lost than never to have lost at all. --- Samuel Butler I grew up in Europe, where the history comes from. --- Eddie Izzard
A woman was found guilty in traffic court and when asked for her occupation she said she was a schoolteacher. The judge rose from the bench. "Madam, I have waited years for a schoolteacher to appear before this court." He smiled with delight. "Now sit down at that table and write 'I will not run a red light ever again' five hundred times."
Three churches - Baptist, Methodist, and Presbyterian - worked together to sponsor a community-wide revival. After the revival had concluded, the three pastors were discussing the results with one another. The Methodist minister said, "The revival worked out great for us! We gained 4 new families." The Baptist preacher said, "We did better than that! We gained 6 new families." The Presbyterian pastor said, "Well, we did even better than that! We got rid of our 10 biggest trouble makers!"
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Thaks to mary Ann for this picture: Click on the picture for the large version Below is what we seen from our house yesterday, the SUN actually came out and no snow coming down. Mary Ann - between Tonasket & Riverside, WA (south of the border from Osoyoos BC)
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Gregg Greaves, 23, Chicago, Illinois Jailed for Defecating Into His Hands, Throwing Feces At Police Reported by The Weekly Vice Gregg Greaves, a 23-year-old North Side bonehead was jailed Sunday after he allegedly attacked a man with a broken beer bottle, then attacked police officers with his feces. According to Chicago police, Greaves was at the Red Ivy Bar in Wrigleyville when he jumped out from behind a bathroom stall and attacked a man with a broken beer bottle. The victim suffered deep cuts to his neck, chin and hands. The victim and a witness who was also in the restroom at the time, restrained Greaves until police arrived on the scene. Arriving officers took Greaves into custody and transporting him to a booking station. While officers were attempting to process Greaves into a holding cell, he allegedly yelled obscenities at the officers and refused to wear pants. At one point Greaves defecated into his own hands and threw his feces at the officers. Greaves was booked into jail and charged with felony aggravated battery causing great bodily harm. He is scheduled to appear in court on December 17th. The 25-year-old victim was taken to the Advocate Illinois Masonic Medical Center, where he underwent surgery and was later released.
Tech Support Pits From: Sylvie Re: Caps Lock Dear Webby How can I permanently, once and for all, disable the CAPS LOCK key ? I am transcribing and just glance at the keyboard every second or third paragraph, and it's very annoying to find that I have to retype them. Thanks Sylvie Dear Sylvie I take a spoon or screwdriver and pry off the CAPS LOCK key and then glue it on somebody's fax machine or the coin operated copier at Walmart or Staples. It's no more useful there, except for causing a few laughs when somebody new asks about it. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Thank Yous That Last Take pictures of you child opening a gift for Christmas or their birthday. Print the picture out and have the child write a thank you on the back of it and send it as a Thank You to the person giving the gift. You can also sent picture in attachment in an email with thank you from child. If child is too young, you can write what they say. The expression as they open the gift is often priceless. By Southernbelleklb from Jefferson, LA Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

Thanks to Dianne for this story: At a dinner party, several of the guests were arguing whether men or women were more trustworthy. "No woman," said one man, scornfully, "can keep a secret." "I would dispute that," answered a woman guest. "I have kept my age a secret since I was twenty-one." "You'll let it out some day," the man insisted. "I hardly think so!" responded the lady. "When a woman has kept a secret for twenty-seven years, she can keep it forever."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Some tourists in the Chicago Museum of Natural History are marveling at the dinosaur bones. One of them asks the guard, "Can you tell me how old the dinosaur bones are?" The guard replies, "They are 3 million, four years, and six months old." "That's an awfully exact number," says the tourist. "How do you know their age so precisely?" The guard answers, "Well, the dinosaur bones were three million years old when I started working here, and that was four and a half years ago."
» Foal Fotos


Today in 
1492 1st Spanish settlement in New World founded, by Columbus 
1620 Pilgrims arrived at Plymouth MA
1773 Expulsion of tea ships from Philadelphia 
1825 Erie Canal opens
1854 Wood-pulp paper 1st exhibited, Buffalo
1862 1st US navy hospital ship enters service 
1878 1st US store to install electric lights, Philadelphia 
1917 Federal government took over operation of American RR 
   for duration of WWI 
1932 Earthquake kills 70,000 in Kansu China
1933 US forswears armed intervention in the Western Hemisphere 
1941 Winston Churchill becomes 1st British PM to address a joint 
   meeting of Congress
1943 British sink German battle cruiser Scharnhorst
1944 Battle of Bastogne-US General Patton's 4th Panzers repulse 
   the Germans
1968 Arab terrorists in Athens fire on El Al plane, kill 1 
1975 1st supersonic transport service (USSR-Tupolev-144) 
1982 TIME's Man of the Year is a computer 
1986 Hijackers take over an Iraqi Airways Boeing 737 
   with 91 people on board during a flight from Baghdad 
   to Amman - it lands in Arar, Saudi Arabia where it 
  explodes, killing 62 people.
1993 Comedian Rodney Dangerfield (72) weds Joan Child (41) 
 2012  smiled


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How to avoid the Red X when forwarding 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Tuesday, December 25 Merry Christmas ! Can't see the moon through the clouds, which seem to start at about head level, but everything is light enough, that it's probably getting close to full moon. Living in the clouds does show some pretty sights. Over towards town the fog is the usual orange from the street lights, and that is pretty too. Temperature is around -30, but the wind has slowed down, so a short walk was quite OK. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Facts are stubborn things, but statistics are more pliable. --- Mark Twain Of all forms of caution, caution in love is perhaps the most fatal to true happiness. --- Bertrand Russell
Thanks to Dianne for the update she got from her IT department: MEMO: IT SYSTEM UPGRADE Dear All, As part of our on going cost-cutting exercise, we are proposing a major change to our Desktop policy and a further move towards a recycling and paperless office. The goal is to remove all laptop computers by March 2013 and all desktop computers by April 2013. Instead, everyone will be provided with an Etch-A-Sketch. Technical Justification: 1. No boot-up problems 2. No technical glitches keeping work from being done. 3. No more wasted time reading and writing emails. 4. No more worries about power cuts. 5. Budget savings on upgrades unparalleled 6. No danger of viruses and worms infecting our data. Frequently Asked Questions from the Etch-A-Sketch Help Desk: Q: My Etch-A-Sketch has all of these funny little lines all over the screen. A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: How do I turn my Etch-A-Sketch off? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: What's the shortcut for Undo? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: How do I create a New Document window? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: How do I set the background and foreground to the same colour? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: What is the proper procedure for rebooting my Etch-A-Sketch? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: How do I delete a document on my Etch-A-Sketch? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: How do I save my Etch-A-Sketch document? A: Don't shake it. Regards, IT Department.
A married couple in their early 60s was out celebrating their 35th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant. Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table and said, "For being such an exemplary married couple and for being faithful to each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish." "Oh, I want to travel around the world with my darling husband" said the wife. The fairy waved her magic wand and - poof! - two tickets for the Queen Mary II luxury liner appeared in her hands. Then it was the husband's turn. He thought for a moment and said: "Well, this is all very romantic, but an opportunity like this will never come again. I'm sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me." The wife and the fairy were deeply disappointed, but a wish is a wish... So the fairy waved her magic wand and - poof! - he was 92 years old.
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Click on the picture for the large version Merry Christmas from DearWebby
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Brent Bartel, 39, Richland Hills, TX Jailed for Carving Pentagram Into 6-Year-Old Son's Back Reported by The Weekly Vice Brent Bartel, a 39-year-old Texas bonehead, was jailed Wednesday after he carved a pentagram into his 6-year-old son's back - then called 911 to report what he had done. According to Richland Hills Police, officers were dispatched to a North Texas residence after a man called 911 to report that he had "shed some innocent blood." When the dispatcher asked what the caller meant, he responded "I inscribed a pentagram on my son." When the 911 operator asked why the man did that, he responded "Because it was a holy day." Although it wasn't clear exactly what the man meant, investigators believe Bartel might have associated the calendar date 12-12-2012 as a day of significance. As Bartel was talking to the dispatcher, Bartel's wife ran to a neighbor's house to call police. When officers arrived on the scene, they found a 6-year-old boy standing inside the house wearing pajama bottoms and no shirt. Investigators found a large pentagram carved into the boy's back and a box cutter nearby. In a strange twist, according to the arrest report, Bartel took some of his son's blood and smeared it onto the front door frame of the family's home. Bartel was immediately taken into custody. The boy was wrapped in a paramedic's jacket and transported to a local hospital where he is listed in stable condition. Bartel was booked into jail and charged with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon. His bond has been set at $500,000.
Tech Support Pits From: Sarah Re: Red X when forwarding mail with pictures Dear Webby, I receive email forwards (some have been forwarded several times) that come through fine, but on some (not all) when I try to forward, the dreaded little box with red x comes up instead of sending the pictures. Sarah Dear Sarah The only way I know to get around this is save the picture to the desktop, then attach it either in a new email or if there is text in the fwd, that you want to use, attach it in there. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Spaghetti Sauce Spice Mix As Frugal Gift When I make spaghetti, I use a mix of spices that I add to my sauce, such as garlic powder, oregano, basil, crushed chilies, and sugar. I poured about one tablespoon full of each into a baggie and zip-locked it closed. Then I bought a small Christmas tin at the dollar store and put the baggie inside. For cooking instructions, I cut out a section of old Christmas card and wrote the spaghetti preparation on one side. After punching one hole in the recipe card, I tied it with Christmas ribbon around the can to give as a gift. Source: I found this idea in the Gooseberry Patch Christmas Book from the library. By Patricia from Maple Falls, WA Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

A park ranger in the Everglades was making his rounds a couple of summers ago when a woman came bolting out of the weeds right in front of his truck. She seemed frantic and he finally got her calm enough to say that her five- year-old son was sitting on the back of an alligator. Now the ranger was frantic. Running in the direction she was pointing he found the lad astride a twelve foot male alligator which was trying to relieve itself of its load by twisting and snapping. As the brave ranger moved in he tried to console the mother by saying, "I think I can grab the boy and move away before the gator moves. Be ready to grab your son. I may have to shoot the gator." To which the lady replies "Good Heavens, no! Don't shoot him. I just wanted you to make him hold still for a minute so I could take my son's picture on his back."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
The day after his wife disappeared in a kayaking accident, an Anchorage man answered the door to find two grim-faced Alaska State Troopers. "We're sorry Mr. Wilkens, but we have some information about your wife," said one trooper. "Tell me! Did you find her?" Wilkens shouted. The troopers looked at each other. One said, "We have some bad news, some good news, and some really great news. Which do you want to hear first?" Fearing the worst, an ashen Mr. Wilkens said, "Give me the bad news first." The trooper said, "I'm sorry to tell you, sir, but this morning we found your wife's body in Kachemak Bay." "Oh my God!" exclaimed Wilkens. Swallowing hard, he asked, "What's the good news?" The trooper continued. "When we pulled her up she had two 25 pound king crabs and six good-size Dungeness crabs on her. They are in this cooler." Stunned, Mr. Wilkens demanded, "If that's the good news, what's the great news?" The trooper said, "We're going to pull her up again tomorrow."
» Old Fashioned Toys


Today in 
0004 -BC- Jesus of Nazareth was born
0352 1st definite date Christmas was celebrated on Dec 25th 
0498 French king Clovis baptises himself 
0800 Pope Leo III crowns Charles the Great 
   (Charlemagne), Roman emperor
0875 Charles, the Bare, crowned emperor of Rome 
0999 Heribertus becomes bishop of Cologne
1000 Monarch István crowned king of Hungary 
1066 William the Conqueror, crowned king of England 
1492 Columbus' ship Santa Maria docks at Dominican Republic
1522 Turkish troops occupy Rhodos 
1651 Massachusetts General Court ordered a fine
   (five shillings) for "observing any such day as Christmas" 
1717 Floods ravage Dutch coast provinces, 1000s killed
1741 Astronomer Anders Celcius introduces Centigrade 
   temperature scale 
1776 Washington crosses Delaware & surprises & 
   defeats 1,400 Hessians 
1896 "Stars & Stripes Forever" written by John Philip Sousa
1900 Arthur Schnitzlers "Leutnant Gustl" forbidden in Germany 
1926 Hirohito becomes emperor of Japan (1926-1989) 
1942 Admiral Dalans, murderer of Bosinier de la Chapelle, 
   sentenced to death
1942 Russian artillery/tank battle on German armies at 
   Stalingrad 
1959 Sony brings transistor TV 8-301 to the market 
1979 USSR airlifts invasionary army to Afghánistán 
2012  smiled


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Restore lost contact list 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Monday, December 24.
Yes, this is a Merry Christmas site.
If you don't like that,
and don't want to get paid
for Christmas Day and Boxing Day,
then your generic holiday is
coming up the day after March 31.
We sure have a White Christmas this year. At -26 and fresh snow on top of older snow, any mention of Gullible Warming causes hilarity and joking. "Is that after the end of the world or before?" "That should help my car start!" "Has hell frozen over?" Well, arctic ice is thicker than normal, in spite of the underwater volcanoes. The natural gas bubbling up and accumulating under the ice seems to act like an insulator and less ice is melted from below by the warm water. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Television has done much for psychiatry by spreading information about it, as well as contributing to the need for it. --- Alfred Hitchcock Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform. --- Mark Twain (1835 - 1910) Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead. --- Benjamin Franklin
A young man called his mother and announced excitedly that he had just met the woman of his dreams. Now what should he do? His mother had an idea: "Why don't you send her flowers, and on the card invite her to your apartment for a home-cooked meal?" He thought this was a great strategy, and a week later, the woman came to dinner. His mother called the next day to see how things had gone. "I was totally humiliated," he moaned. "She insisted on washing the dishes." "What's wrong with that?" asked his mother. "We hadn't started eating yet."
Employed by the human-development center of a corporation in the Midwest, a young woman trains employees in proper dress codes and etiquette. One day as she was stepping onto the elevator, a man casually dressed in jeans and a golf shirt got on with her. Thinking of her responsibilities, she scolded, "Dressed a little casually today, aren't we?" The man shrugged, "Yeah, well, that's one benefit of owning the company."
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Click on the picture for the large version Merry Christmas from DearWebby
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Benjamin Greene, 22, Spartanburg, SC Jailed for Shoplifting "Miley Cyrus" Blow Up Doll Reported by The Weekly Vice Benjamin Greene, a 22-year-old North Carolina man was jailed Tuesday after he allegedly tried to shoplift a "Miley Cyrus" blow up doll. According Spartanburg police, Greene was inside a Spencer Gifts retail store Dec 11 when a cashier saw Greene remove a 'Finally Mylie Lovedoll' from its packaging and place it inside his coat. Investigators say Greene passed all points of sale and proceeded to leave the store when the employee stopped him and demanded that he return the doll. Greene responded by opening his jacket which allowed the doll to drop to the floor. The doll, which is distributed by Pipedream Products, does not look like Miley Cyrus - but instead resembles a generic blow up doll with a hollowed out mouth. Spencer Gifts sells the item in their stores for $19.99. Greene was booked into the Spartanburg County Jail and charged with a misdemeanor count of shoplifting. He was released without bond. They know where he lives and that he has no money to get out of town.
Tech Support Pits From: Shirley Re: Lost address list in OE Dear Webby, By mistake I lost my contact list. Could you please tell me what to do to get it back? Thank you for your newsletter as I appreciate all you do in answering the computer questions and everything else. Merry Christmas to you Shirley Dear Shirley I have never used Outlook or outlook Depressed, so I forwarded your email to Dianne, the lady, who emails me the daily Bonus Link. Here is her reply: easiest is to do a System Restore to 3 days prior to losing contact (aka 'mailing) list. Merry Christmas & Happy New Year! Diane Dear Webby worked like a dream. Thank you to both of you. Merry Christmas to you and good health as to Dianne also. Shirley Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Less Trash on Christmas Day Here's a good way to take some of the excess stress (and trash) out of Christmas Day; especially if you have kids. Before wrapping toys, remove all the excess packaging and put the toys back in the box. If a toy needs batteries, insert them beforehand. This way, your kids get to play right away, and the amount of trash gets cut in half! By Brianna S. from Dutch Harbor, AK Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

Linda was hunched over the bar, toothpick in hand, spearing futilely at the olive in her drink. A dozen times the olive eluded her. Finally, another patron, who had been watching intently from the next stool, became exasperated and grabbed the toothpick. "Here, this is how you do it." he said, as he easily skewered the olive. "Big Deal," muttered Linda. "I already had him so tired out, he couldn't get away."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
The crumbling, old church building needed remodeling, so the preacher made an impassioned appeal, looking directly at the richest may in town. At the end of the message, the rich man stood up and announced, "Pastor, I will contribute $1,000." Just then, plaster fell from the ceiling and struck the rich man on the shoulder. He promptly stood again and shouted, "Pastor, I will increase my donation to $5,000." Before he could sit back down, plaster fell on him again and he screamed, "Pastor, I will double my last pledge." He sat down and an even larger chunk of plaster fell, this time hitting him on the head. He stood once more and hollered, "Pastor, I will give $20,000!" This prompted a deacon to shout, "Hit him again, Lord! Hit him again!"
» Bronze Frogs


Today in 
1476 400 Burgundy soldiers freeze to death during siege of Nancy 
1593 Storm hits Texel: 40 ships hit, 500 killed
1715 Swedish troops occupy Norway 
1798 Russia & England sign Second anti-French Coalition
1818 "Silent Night" composed by Franz Joseph Gruber; 
   sung for 1st time the next day 
1870 Giusseppi Verdi's "Aida" premieres at Cairo Opera, 
1889 Daniel Stover & William Hance patent bicycle 
   with back pedal brake 
1904 German SW Africa abolishes slavery of young children 
1906 Reginald A Fessenden became 1st to broadcast music 
   over radio (Massachusetts) 
1936 1st radioactive isotope medicine administered, Berkeley CA 
1942 1st powered flight of V-1 buzz bomb, Peenemünde, Germany 
1948 1st US house completely sunheated is occupied (Dover MA) 
1953 2 fast express trains crash head-on, killing 103 
    (Czechoslovakia)
1953 Wellington-Auckland (New Zealand) express train swept away 
   in flood kills 166
1963 Greek & Turks riot in Cyprus
1966 Luna 13 lands on Moon
1968 Apollo 8 astronauts' Christmas reading (Book of Genesis) 
   while orbiting Moon 
1970 9 Jews are convicted in Leningrad for hijacking a plane 
1997 1st time a Channukah candles are officially lit in Vatican
2012  smiled


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Last minute gifts that last 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Sunday, December 23.
Yes, this is a Merry Christmas site.
If you don't like that,
and don't want to get paid
for Christmas Day and Boxing Day,
then your generic holiday is
coming up the day after March 31.
-26 sure reminds you to take your mittens along, or stick your hands deep into your pockets. Walking against the wind sure is tempting to turn and walk backwards when the gusts blow the fresh snow off the trees and roofs. Looks pretty, though! Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away. --- Philip K. Dick Too bad the only people who know how to run the country are busy driving cabs and cutting hair. --- George Burns My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle. --- Henry Youngman
One afternoon a waiter served a bowl of chicken soup to an elderly gentleman. As he turned away to return to the kitchen the customer stopped him, calling:......"Waiter!" WAITER: "Yes,sir, is there something wrong?" CUSTOMER: "The soup. Taste it." WAITER: "I beg your pardon, Sir?" CUSTOMER: "Taste it." WAITER: "But, Sir, I can assure you that the soup is excellent." CUSTOMER: "Taste it." WAITER: "Sir, the soup was made this morning of the finest ingredients." CUSTOMER: "Taste it!" WAITER: exasperated, "All right, Sir, I'll taste it." Then after a pause he said, "Where is the spoon?" To which the customer replied triumphantly, "Ah ha!!"
The elderly woman was at the gynecologist's office for her checkup appointment. The doctor was having a hard time getting his "gooseneck" lamp to stay in one place so that he could see well. Finally he told the nurse, "Well, that thing's just worn out!" The old lady sat up and said, "Well, I can't help it. I'm not getting any younger!
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Click on the picture for the large version Taiwan Blue Magpies
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Erin Haskell, 31, Barnegat, NJ Jailed for Having Sex With Middle School Student Reported by The Weekly Vice Erin Haskell, a 31-year-old Spanish teacher at Toms River Intermediate South, has been charged after she allegedly had sex with a middle school student. According to police, she engaged in a sexual relationship with at least one student, who reportedly attended her class. Haskell reportedly taught Spanish to students ranging from 5th grade to 8th grade. Investigators would not release any other information in the case to protect the identity of the students. School officials say Haskell has been placed on administrative leave pending the outcome of the investigation. Haskell was booked into jail and charged with first and second degree aggravated sexual assault, endangering the welfare of a child and exhibiting obscene material to a minor. Bail was set at $300,000 with no 10 percent option. "exhibiting obscene material to a minor" is normally used for sending naked pictures via phone or Internet and indicates, that the prosecutor has plenty of proof for a conviction. The "no 10% bail option" indicates the same. She faces up to 20 years in jail..
Tech Support Pits From: Annalise Re: Quick gift Dear Webby I need a qick gift for a family that moved away and somehow fell off the gift list. Obviously it is too late to ship anything. What can you suggest, that would still arrive? Annalise Dear Annalise The only company that ships that suddenly is AtlanticInkjet. They seem to ship almost before I order, and sometimes I wonder if they have a secret tap into my printer. Because a lot of people were clamoring and begging Dimitris, he reset the 7 day coupon, that ran out on December 19, and reset it to December 28. I printed the reset coupon below here. By the way, the $10 off also works on Avery style label sheets! Those label sheets are already extremely cheap, and getting $10 off them is incredible! So, ask your friends what kind of printer they use, then order them a refill and some label sheets, and as soon as you get the order confirmation, paste the important parts of it onto an Internet Postcard to them. Even if the post office can't quite deliver in time, they will have the order confirmation, and know that the goodies are on the way. By the way, they also have edible ink and printable, edible cake tops. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Wash Dishes With A Loofah Instead of using a regular kitchen sponge, try using a loofah or bath scrub to wash your dishes. They dry much faster than a kitchen sponge and provide more lather. I assume the quicker drying time helps prevent bacterial buildup, as mine have never felt slimy like a kitchen sponge. Loofah's may also be microwaved while wet for approximately 2 minutes to kill germs. Please do not microwave the plastic scrubs! I've tried cloths, etc., but in my opinion nothing beats a loofah. By Ivy from Rancho Plaos Verdes Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

At a wedding I recently attended, the priest called for a moment of silence to remember the faithful dead... As the church grew quiet, a little boy sitting in front of me turned to his grandfather and said excitedly, "Grampa, you have some of their albums!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
The bride was anything but a tidy housekeeper. It didn't bother her much until one evening when her husband called from the hall, somewhat dismayed: "Honey, what happened to the dust on this table? I had a phone number written on it."
» Tilt Shift Photography


Today in 
1620 French Huguenots declare war on King Louis XIII 
1672 Giovanni Cassini discovers Rhea, a satellite of Saturn
1688 English king Jacob II flees to France 
1690 John Flamsteed observes Uranus without realizing it's 
   undiscovered 
1751 France sets plan to tax clergymen 
1776 Continental Congress negotiates a war loan of $181,500 
   from France
1788 Maryland votes to cede a 10 square mile area for 
   District of Columbia
1832 Dutch troops in Antwerp surrender 
1834 Joseph Hansom of London receives patent for Hansom cabs
1867 1st self-made millionairess (Sarah Breedlove-hair 
   straightener) 
1888 Dutch painter Vincent van Gogh cuts off his left ear 
1899 Tentative Turkish & German treaty on construction of 
   Baghdad railway 
1912 1st "Keystone Kops" film, titled "Hoffmeyer's Legacy" 
1912 Aswan Dam in Nile begins operation 
1920 Ireland divided into 2 parts, each with its own parliament 
 1933 Train crash in Eastern Paris; 230 die
1939 Finnish counter offensive at Summa 
1941 American forces on Wake Island surrender to Japanese
1941 British troops overrun Benghazi Libya
1941 Japan begins assault on Rangoon Burma 
1944 Beginning of harsh winter 
1947 Transistor invented by Bardeen, Brattain & Shockley 
   in Bell Labs 
1960 King Saudi of Saudi-Arabia takes power 
1961 Fidel Castro announces Cuba will release 1,113 POWs 
   from failed 1961 Bay of Pigs Invasion for $62 million worth 
   of food & medical supplies 
1962 Cuba starts returning US prisoners from the Bay of 
   Pigs invasion 
1968 82 members of US intelligence ship 'Pueblo' 
   released by North Korea 
1968 Borman, Lovell & Anders become 1st men to orbit Moon 
1973 6 Persian Gulf nations double their oil prices
1986 Rutan & Yeager make 1st around-the-world flight 
   without refueling 
1990 Slovenians vote to secede from Yugoslavia
1997 US Agriculture Department estimates it costs $149,820
    to raise a child to 18
1997 Woody Allen, 62 weds Soon-Yi Previn 27,  
   adopted daughter of Mia Farrow 
2012  smiled


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Last minute quick gifts: Ink and Toner 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Saturday, December 22.
Yes, this is a Merry Christmas site.
If you don't like that,
and don't want to get paid
for Christmas Day and Boxing Day,
then your generic holiday is
coming up the day after March 31.
Today in 1983 Egyptian President Mubarak meets with PLO leader Yasser Arafat. Under Sadat and even more so under Mubarak, Egypt had slowly become an almost Western country, and eased away from being a typical Arab country. Arab Spring sure changed that! How did you celebrate the end of the world, according to the Mayan Calendar? Reading about all the expensive "End Of The World" parties? I was planning to, but got too busy. The only thing that ended was my good old digital outdoor thermometer. It seems to have frozen. I bought that in 1982, 30 years ago, at the Radio Shack. Sure got a lot of service out of that one! Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Any man who thinks he can be happy and prosperous by letting the Government take care of him; better take a closer look at the American Indian. --- Henry Ford There is nothing so absurd but some philosopher has said it. --- Cicero, (in De Divinatione)
>From Eve Part of my job at the District Attorney's office is to send letters to people accused of crimes, informing them when a court date is scheduled. One such notice was returned, clearly by a criminal mastermind, with this jotted on the envelope, "I do not live here anymore."
Although I knew our commanding officer hated doling out weekend passes, I thought I had a good reason. "My wife is pregnant and I want to be with her," I told the C.O. Much to my surprise he said, "Permission granted." Inspired by my success, a fellow soldier also requested a weekend pass. His wife wasn't pregnant, so when the C.O. asked why he should grant him permission, my friend re- sponded, "My wife is getting pregnant this weekend and I want to be with her."
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Click on the picture for the large version
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Kevon Stewart, 25, Lauderhill, Florida Jailed for Biting Off Wife's Ear During Birthday Celebration Reported by The Weekly Vice Kevon Stewart, a 25-year-old Lauderhill man was jailed Sunday after he allegedly bit most of his wife's ear off during an argument on her birthday. According to police, Stewart and his wife were visiting the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino on her birthday when they began arguing inside a fourth level parking garage. A security guard was called to the scene around 6:00 a.m, and he called police after he saw Stewart put his wife in a headlock. The couple attempted to drive away, but the security officer stopped them after he noticed that the woman was bleeding heavily from her ear. Closer inspection revealed that a majority of the woman's ear had been bitten off and was hanging from the side of her head. The victim was taken to the Memorial Hospital West in Pembroke Pines where the ear was stapled on again and she was treated for her injuries. Stewart confessed to biting his wife's ear, and stated that they were at the casino to celebrate her 29th birthday. They coulple has been married for 2 years. Stewart was booked into jail and charged with felony domestic battery. His bond has been set at $12,500. The report does not state how intoxicated they were, when they tried to drive home at 6 am.
Tech Support Pits From: Annalise Re: Quick gift Dear Webby I need a qick gift for a family that moved away and somehow fell off the gift list. Obviously it is too late to ship anything. What can you suggest, that would still arrive? Annalise Dear Annalise The only company that ships that suddenly is AtlanticInkjet. They seem to ship almost before I order, and sometimes I wonder if they have a secret tap into my printer. Because a lot of people were clamoring and begging Dimitris, he reset the 7 day coupon, that ran out on December 19, and reset it to December 28. I printed the reset coupon below here. By the way, the $10 off also works on Avery style label sheets! Those label sheets are already extremely cheap, and getting $10 off them is incredible! So, ask your friends what kind of printer they use, then order them a refill and some label sheets, and as soon as you get the order confirmation, paste the important parts of it onto an Internet Postcard to them. Even if the post office can't quite deliver in time, they will have the order confirmation, and know that the goodies are on the way. By the way, they also have edible ink and printable, edible cake tops. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Reduce Overflowing in Fruit Pies Before Mixing When I bake fruit filled pies such as Blueberry, after adding the top crust as well as cutting slits in the top crust, I take a piece of tube type pasta and insert it in the center of my pie crust. This will let the steam out and keep the filling in the pie., Source: My Mom By JodiT from Aurora, CO Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

When Dan found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided he needed a woman to enjoy it with. So one evening he went to a singles bar where he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her natural beauty took his breath away. I may look like just an ordinary man," he said as he walked up to her but in just a week or two, my father will die, and I'll inherit 20 million dollars." Impressed, the woman went home with him that evening and, three days later, she became his stepmother.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
A gent from Chicago was on a fishing vacation up north in the Wisconsin woods. He was out fishing on a lake in a small boat and not having much luck. He noticed a man in another small boat that was close by, open his tackle box and take out a mirror. Being curious the man rowed over and enquired, "What is the mirror for?" "That's my secret way to catch fish," replied the other man. "I Shine the mirror on the top of the water. The fish notice the spot of sun on the water above and they swim up to the surface. Then I just reach down, net them and pull them into the boat." "Wow! Does that really work?" exclaimed the guy from Chicago "You bet it does." was the response. "Would you be interested in selling that mirror? I'll give you $50 for it." offered the big city gent. "Well, okay." said the country guy. After the money was transferred, the city fisherman asked, "By the way, how many did you catch this week?" The country local, grinned and said, "You're the sixteenth."
» Golden Gate Bridge


Today in 
1536 English scholar Reginald Pole appointed cardinal 
1596 Ferryboat Meuniers crashes in Paris, 150 die 
1689 Heavy earthquake strikes Innsbruck 
1775 Continental navy organized with 7 ships 
1790 Russian troops occupy Ismail on Turks
1807 Congress passes Embargo Act, to force peace 
   between Britain & France 
1810 British frigate Minotaur sinks killing 480
1815 Spaniards execute Mexican revolutionary priest 
   José Maria Morelos 
1882 1st string of Christmas tree lights created by Edison
1894 French officer Alfred Dreyfus court-martialed for 
   treason, triggers worldwide charges of anti-Semitism 
   (Dreyfus later vindicated) 
1919 Government of Ireland Act of Power 
   (Home Rule for Ireland) 
1919 US deports 250 alien radicals, including anarchist 
   Emma Goldman 
1939 125 die in train wreck at Magdeburg Germany; 
      99 die in 2nd wreck at Friedrichshafen Germany
1939 Finnish counter offensive at Petsamo
1944 Germans demand surrender of American troops 
   at Bastogne, Belgium 
1950 2 self-propelled trains of Long Island RR collide, killing 77
1956 Last British/French troops leave Egypt 
1964 Lockheed SR-71 spy aircraft reaches 3,530 kph 
   (record for a jet) 
1965 Belgian government shuts 6 coal mines
1965 Great-Britain sets maximum speed at 70 MPH 
 1976 German Democratic Republic banishes singer Nina Hagen
1977 36 die as grain elevator at Continental Grain explodes 
1983 Egyptian President Mubarak meets with PLO leader 
   Yasser Arafat 
1988 2 robbers wearing police uniforms rob armored truck of 
   $3 million in New Jersey 
1988 Tug hits oil barge, spreads 231,000 gal on 300 miles of 
   Western Australia & British Columbia coast 
1990 Iraq announces it will never give up Kuwait
1990 Israeli ferry capsizes killing 21 US servicemen 
1997 Merck baldness pill for men approved by FDA 
2012  smiled


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Dark camera LCD 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Friday, December 21. Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!
Yes, this is a Merry Christmas site.
If you don't like that,
and don't want to get paid
for Christmas Day and Boxing Day,
then your generic holiday is
coming up the day after March 31.
Apocalypse and the end of the world has been postponed, because it is alredy tomorrow in Australia. However, don't worry. Al Gore is working on a new FUD (Fear, Uncertainty, Doubt) scheme to get the sheeple's knickers in a knot and to offer to pay more taxes. (The sheeple, not him, of course!) Tonight is the longest night of the year. Starting tomorrow, the days will get longer again! Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

The only thing to do with good advice is pass it on. It is never any use to oneself. --- Oscar Wilde Any man who thinks he can be happy and prosperous by letting the Government take care of him; better take a closer look at the American Indian. --- Henry Ford
>From Dr Bill I've got this great joke:"It seems there were two Swede.." Stop! you can't tell ethnic jokes today! it's not politically correct! - But it's such a great joke, suppose I make the characters Poles? - God NO! - How about Jews? - Worse! - How about Catholics? - absolutely not! - I know, how about Eskimos, nobody knows any? No way! humor about native Americans! You're out of your mind! - Tell you what, I'll make them Martians - that won't offend anybody, and there probably aren't any anyway? - OK, make the characters Martians. - Great: "OK, there were these two Martians, Ole and Sven...."
>From Mike Arriving home from work at my usual hour of 5 p.m., I discovered that it had not been one of my wife's better days. Nothing I said or did seemed to be right. By 7 p.m., things had not changed, so I suggested I go outside, pretend I had just gotten home, and start all over again. My wife agreed. I went outside, came back in and, with a big smile, announced, "Honey, I'm home!" "And just where the hell have you been?" she replied sharply. "It's after seven o'clock!"
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Click on the picture for the large version
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Lester Davis, 57, Wentzville, Missouri Firing Gun Inside Barber Shop During Argument Over Sandy Hook Shooting Reported by The Weekly Vice Lester Davis, a 57-year-old Wentzville man was jailed Tuesday after he allegedly shot at a customer at a local barbershop during a disagreement over the Sandy Hook School shooting. According to the Wentzville Police Department, Davis was at the All Cuts Barber Shop discussing the Sandy Hook school shooting with other customers when an argument broke out between the men. When one of the men stated that he wanted to "murder the suspect," Davis took exception with the statement and responded by saying "you want to murder me?" That's when Davis walked out to his car and returned with a loaded 9mm Smith and Wesson. Before the victim could flee the barber shop, Davis fired off three rounds in his direction. He then reportedly pointed toward the victim and stated "I'll let you slide" before fleeing the scene. The victim was not injured in the altercation. Davis was booked into jail and charged with first-degree assault, armed criminal action, and unlawful possession of a weapon. He is currently being held in lieu of a $400,000 cash-only bond. According to court records, in 1975, Davis was convicted of second-degree homicide and unlawful possession of a weapon in Middlesex County, New Jersey. He has also been involved in numerous verbal altercations with neighbors, resulting in an order of protection being issued against him.
Tech Support Pits From: Elsie Re: Dark camera LCD Dear Webby I bought that Canon Powershot 3S-IS that you recommended. It is phantastic in twilight and the night, and indoors, but practically useless on sow in bright sunshine. The LCD monitor on it goes black and you can't see anything. The optical view finder goes black too. Is the camera broken or am I doing something wrong? Elsie Dear Elsie The camera is not broken. All LCD camera monitors APPEAR to be black when you are out in bright sunshine on snow. They are not really black, just compared to the bright scenery, your eye does not see it right. Just use a black silk cape like photographers have used for hundreds of years. If you are concerned that might mess up your hairdoo, close the LCD monitor flap. That unlocks the optical view finder and you can use that. While not as informative as the LCD monitor, it's plenty good enough for aiming. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Grease Beaters/Utensils Before Mixing Lightly spray your beaters with cooking spray. This helps to prevent batter from sticking on the beaters plus easier clean up. Also, when mashing potatoes, spray the masher with cooking spray. You can lightly spray most utensils for baking/cooking to prevent sticking and for easier clean-up. To prevent over spraying, hold beaters/utensils over bowl or baking pan that is to be used, then lightly spray. By Nana from NE PA / USA -------------- I have been using an Amway trigger spray bottle filled with Olive oil for at least twenty years, with occasional refills, of course. Even the best Olive oil is fifty times cheaper than Cooking spray, and probably a lot healthier! Have FUN! DearWebby Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

In Washington State, a little north of Seattle, is a river called the Stillaguamish, but it wasn't always called that. It was originally named "Aguamish" after a local Indian tribe. When Lewis & Clark finally made their way to the west coast they came to the Aguamish tribe and met the chief who told them what the name of the river was and gave them a tour of the area. Years later Merriweather Lewis returned and met the Aguamish chief again and the subject finally came around to the river: "Chief, I've been told that, because of so many white men have arrived in the area, many of the rivers are being renamed because they couldn't pronounce the names. Tell me, what is the name of your river now, please, " Lewis pleaded. "Oh," replied the chief. "It's Still Aguamish."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
An American tourist in Tel Aviv was about to enter the impressive Mann Auditorium to take in a concert by the Israel Philharmonic. He was admiring the unique architecture, the sweeping lines of the entrance, and the modern decor throughout the building. Finally he turned to his escort and asked if the building was named for Thomas Mann, the world-famous author. "No," his friend said, "it's named for Freddy Mann, from Philadelphia." "Really? I never heard of him. What did he write?" "A check."
» Sky Trails


Today in 
1945 George S Patton US general (Sicily/Normandy), 
   dies in car accident in Heidelberg at 60 

1620 103 Mayflower pilgrims land at Plymouth Rock 
1829 1st stone arch railroad bridge in US dedicated, Baltimore
1910 Explosion in coal mine in Hulton England, 344 mine workers die
1914 1st feature-length silent film comedy, "Tillie's 
   Punctured Romance"
1919 J Edgar Hoover deports anarchists/feminist Emma 
   Goldman to Russia 
1933 Newfoundland reverts to being a crown colony 
1942 US Supreme court declares Nevada separation legal 
1948 State of Eire (formerly Irish Free State) declares its 
   independence 
1959 Shah of Persia marries Farah Diba
1962 US & Cuba accord, releases bay of pigs captives
1988 New York bound Pan Am jumbo jet (Flight 103) explodes 
   over Scotland, killing all 259 people on the plane and 11 people 
   on the ground 
1989 US invades Panamá and ousts General Noriega 
1989 Vice-President Quayle sends out 30,000 Christmas cards 
   with word beacon spelled beakon
1991 Hanoi Jane (Jane Fonda) marries CNN-director Ted Turner
1997 Detroit Lions linebacker Reggie Brown, knocked 
unconscious in game 
2012  smiled


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Transferring bookmarks to a new machine 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Thursday, December 20
Yes, this is a Merry Christmas site.
If you don't like that,
and don't want to get paid
for Christmas Day and Boxing Day,
then your generic holiday is
coming up the day after March 31.
I had a long tirade here about focusing on taking care of nut cases instead of blindly following the leader in trying to disarm a nation, but I cut it. Here I would be preaching to the choir, and the rest is hypnotized and not thinking anyway. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

The human mind treats a new idea the same way the body treats a strange protein; it rejects it. --- P. B. Medawar
Lars asked Ole, "Do ya know da difference between a Norvegian and a canoe?" "No, I don't," said Ole. "A canoe will sometimes tip," explained Lars.
Ole is so cheap that after his airplane landed safely he grumbled, "Vell, dere gose five dollars down da drain for dat flight insurance!"
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Click on the picture for the large version The Queen, used to sitting through long speeches and parades, is reputed to be an accomplished ventriloquist, able to crack up politicians just as the picture is snapped. Since most of them are rather dense, by the time they get a joke, the Queen has long resumed the official stoneface mien. The queen watched the clowns (cabinet) for 25 minutes, and received a stack of placemats in exchange.
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Jennifer Shurtleff, 27, Hannibal, Ill Jailed for Stuffing Drugs Into Child's Pocket During Arrest For Shoplifting Reported by The Weekly Vice Jennifer Shurtleff, a 27-year-old Hannibal woman was jailed Thursday after she allegedly hid a large amount of drugs in her child's pocket while she was caught shoplifting from Kmart. According to Quincy Police, Shurtleff was attempting to shoplift from a local Kmart when she was stopped by a loss prevention officer working at the store. The loss prevention officer held the woman and her young daughter at the store until police arrived on the scene. Arriving officers searched Shurtleff and her daughter and allegedly recovered stolen merchandise totaling less than $300. Officers also discovered heroin, cocaine and marijuana that Shurtleff had placed inside her daughter's pocket. The amount of cocaine and heroin found in the child's pocket exceeded one full gram each, so the charges against Shurtleff were upgraded to possession with intent to sell. Shurtleff was booked into the Adams County Jail and charged with endangering the welfare of a child, two felony counts of unlawful possession with intent to deliver a controlled substance, one felony count of retail theft, and unlawful possession of cannabis. She is currently being held in lieu of a $20,000 bond. According to court records, this was not Shurtleff's first retail theft arrest. In 2009, she received 12 months conditional discharge, 40 hours of public service, and two days in the county jail. She successfully completed the terms of her discharge in 2009.
Tech Support Pits From: Ron Re: Transferring bookmarks to a new mchine Dear Webby I need help again. I am using Firefox need to transfer my bookmarks to my new machine. I am at a loss for this one how can I do it? Old machine has Windows XP new one has Windows 7. Windows 7 does not seem to be as bad as I thought I can get around it pretty good "so far" thanks for your help Dear Ron Save your bookmarks to a file. Mail that file to yourself. Check the mail from the new machine. Import the bookmarks. Hi Webby Thanks that will help but I do not know where to find the bookmarks file, where do they hide it. Hi Ron Click on BOOKMARKS SHOW all Bookmarks Import and BackUp BackUp Then on the new machine, after you have mailed or transferred that file to it, do the same, but select Restore instead of BackUp. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Common Sense Holiday Gift Giving Common sense tells you not to buy those pajamas's when you have no idea what someone's size is. Get them a gift certificate or ask them what they want or need first. In the current time of having to be thrifty with your money and make it stretch way beyond what you think you should, something handmade or a box of favorite candies will suffice as a warm message to someone to just show them you care. By Gem from VA Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

"Hey, Sven," said Ole, "how many Swedes does it take to grease a combine?" After Sven replied he didn't know, Ole said, "Only two, if you run them through real slow."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
During a business trip to Boeing's Everett, Washington factory, I noticed several 747 and 777 airliners being assembled. Before the engines were installed, huge weights were hung from the wings to keep the planes balanced. The solid-steel weights were bright yellow and marked "14,000 lbs." But what I found particularly interesting was some stenciling I discovered on the side of each weight. Imprinted there was the warning: "Remove before flight."
» WestJet Surprise Christmas FlashMob


Today in 
0069 General Vespasianus occupies Rome
1046 Synod of Sutri: German king Henry III removes Popes 
   Gregory VI, Benedictus IX & Silvester III & names 
   Bishop Siutger to Pope Clemens II
1192 Richard the Lionhearted captured in Vienna 
1600 Ottario Rinuccini/Giulio Caccini's opera "Euridice" 
1606 Virginia Company settlers leave London to establish 
   Jamestown VA 
1669 1st jury trial in Delaware; Marcus Jacobson condemned 
   for insurrection & sentenced to flogging, branding & slavery 
1699 Peter the Great ordered Russian New Year changed-Sept 1 
   to Jan 1
1745 Bonnie Prince Charlie's army meets de Esk
1780 England declares war on Netherlands
1790 1st successful US cotton mill to spin yarn (Pawtucket RI) 
1803 Louisiana Purchase formally transferred from France to 
   US for $27 million 
1820 Missouri imposes a $1 bachelor tax on unmarried men 
   between 21 & 50
1879 Tom Edison privately demonstrated incandescent light 
   at Menlo Park 
1880 New York's Broadway lit by electricity, becomes 
   known as "Great White Way"
1883 International cantilever railway bridge opens at 
   Niagara Falls 
1892 Pneumatic automobile tire patented, Syracuse NY
1915 Russian troops overrun Qom, Persia
1917 Russian secret police in Czechoslovakia forms
1919 Canadian National Railways established (North 
  America's longest, 50,000 KM) 
1919 US House of Representatives restricts immigration
1920 Bob Hope becomes an American citizen 
1922 14 republics form Union of Soviet Socialistic 
   Republics (USSR) 
1924 Adolf Hitler freed from jail early 
1941 Free France under Admiral Muselier occupies 
   St-Pierre et Miquélon
1941 Japanese troops lands on Mindanao
1942 1st Japanese bombing of Calcutta 
1943 "International" is no longer USSR National Anthem 
  (Still anthem of Unions)
1957 Elvis Presley given draft notice to join US Army
1960 Auschwitz-commandant Richard Bär arrested
1963 Trial against 21 camp guards of Auschwitz begins
1967 474,300 US soldiers in Vietnam
1977 1st Space walk made by G Grechko from Salyut 
1983 PLO chairman Yasser Arafat & 4,000 loyalists 
   evacuate Lebanon
 1988 Animal rights terrorists fire-bomb Harrod's 
   department store, London 
1989 US troops invade Panamá & oust Manuel Noriega, 
   but don't catch him
1990 Pentagon warns Saddam Hussein that US air 
   power is ready to attack on 1/15 
1992 Slobodan Milosevic re-elected President of Serbia 
1999 Portugal returns Macau to China
2012  smiled


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Mailwasher Filters 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Wednesday, December 19

Yes, this is a Merry Christmas site.
If you don't like that, and don't want to get paid for
Christmas Day and Boxing Day, then your generic holiday is
coming up the day after March 31.
Jim & Linda, my name is DearWebby, not "humor". And I am not going to change my user name anywhere. ------------------ Metro Online Guess who will own the pictures of your grandkids and your dog and your spouse by Jan 16 ? And not give you a penny, if they make a few Million bucks by putting your picture of your sweetie is onto every soup can or dogfood bag. You have heard the phrase: "You have been volunteered." The newest phrase is: "You have been agreed." Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

In economics the majority is always wrong." --- John Kenneth Galbraith Your true value depends entirely on what you are compared with. --- Bob Wells Every war has two sides, and just two. One of them is called the enemy side. --- Tacitus
Jane had a system for labeling homemade freezer meals. She would carefully note in large clear letters, "Meatloaf" or "Pot Roast" or "Steak and Vegetables" or "Chicken and Dumplings" or "Beef Pot Pie." Everyday when she asked her husband what he wanted for dinner, he never asked for any of those meals. She decided to stock the freezer with his various requests. What he really likes. In Jane's freezer now you'll see a whole new set of labels. You'll find dinners with neat little tags that say: "Whatever," "Anything," "I Don't Know," "I Don't Care," "Something Good," or "Food." No more frustration for Jane because no matter what her husband replies when she asks him what he wants for dinner, it's there waiting.
Thanks to Kati, today we have a Minnesota Special. Before any silly dogooders get their bloomers into a knot, I'll clarify the difference between Swedes and Norvegians. There isn't any. They are all Minnesotans, just some tell Norvegian jokes and some tell Swede jokes. Lena called the airlines information desk and inquired, "How long does it take to fly from Minneapolis to Fargo?" "Just a minute," said the busy clerk. "Vell, said Lena, "if it has to go dat fast, I tink I'll just take da bus."
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Click on the picture for the large version
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Christine Meyers, 23, Chicago, Ill Jailed for Running Over Boyfriend, Tearing Skin Off His Testicles Reported by The Weekly Vice Christine Meyers, a 23-year-old Chicago woman was jailed Friday after she allegedly drove over her boyfriend, burning the skin off of his testicles in the process. According to police, Meyers had picked up her boyfriend from a bar Friday night when the couple began to argue. When the couple reached their Tinley Park residence, the boyfriend got out of the car and fell down or got knoked down or laid down in front of it. Meyers responded by driving over her boyfriend and burning some rubber on him.. Investigators say the victim suffered severe burns to his chest and back as a result of the assault. The skin covering his testicles was also burned and torn from his body, according to the arrest affidavit. Surgery will be required to correct the damage to the man's testicles, according to police. Meyers was booked into jail and charged with aggravated domestic battery. Her bond has been set at $100,000.
Tech Support Pits From: Frank Re: MailWasher filters Dear Webby Question...I've been using Mailwasher for a number of years and find it beneficial. However, I have problems with making filters to do exactly what I want. Here is the latest concern. I found a message from Nick Bolton @ Mailwasher in my recycle folder. I tried to restore it but it kept getting deleted. My ISP showed it as SPAM and I have a filter that automatically deletes anything with SPAM in the subject line even though the sender may be on my friends list. Is there a way to still delete SPAM but not if the sender is on friends list? Merry Christmas and a healthy New Year Frank Dear Frank In the filters there is a checkbox about This Filter takes precedence over the Friends / Blacklist Watch out for that one. Also keep in mind that once a filter has paint-balled something, that item will no longer be considered. If it has been paint-balled red, it is spam, if it has been paint-balled green, it is good, no matter what other rules come later. You may have to move some filter rules up or down the list. Highliht it, and ust the little elevator button on the left under the filters to jack it up or down. Usually it is best to move the positive filters to the top. For example if the FROM Contains humor@webby.com then consider it legitimate. That paint-balls all the good stuff green and takes it out of the battle. Then go after the stupid wotches and phorma stuff, paint-ball it red and and get that out of the way. And so on. It is just a strategy game, but you can easily win it. Just keep that paint-balled concept in mind. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Use Microwave Plate for Extra Serving Platter Use Microwave Plate for Extra Serving Platter When entertaining this holiday season and you find that you are in need of an extra platter, use the glass platter that's inside your microwave oven. Works like a charm. By annelaundrie Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

The judge had just awarded a divorce to Lena, who had charged non-support. He said to Ole, "I have decided to give your wife $400 a month for support." "Vell, dat's fine, Judge," said Ole. "And vunce in a while I'll try to chip in a few bucks, myself."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Ole bought Lena a piano for her birthday. A few weeks later, Lars inquired how she was doing with it. "Oh," said Ole, "I persuaded her to svitch to a clarinet." "How come," asked Lars? "Vell," Ole answered, "because vith a clarinet she can't sing, and she does not scare de dogs like she did with de tuba."
» Bright Lites


Today in 
1154 King Henry II of England crowned
1551 Dutch west coast hit by hurricane 
1688 King James II's wife & son flee to France 
1732 Benjamin Franklin (under the name Richard Saunders) 
   begins publication of "Poor Richard's Almanack" 
1788 Chinese troops occupy capital Thang Long Vietnam
1828 South Carolina declares the right of states to nullify 
   federal laws 
1843 Charles Dickens publishes "A Christmas Carol" in England 
1871 Albert L Jones (New York NY), patents corrugated paper
1904 The Dawson City (Yukon) hockey team begins 9 day walk to 
   Whitehorse to catch a train to Skagway, Alaska to get a boat 
   to Seattle to catch a train to Ottawa to play in the Stanley Cup 
   on January 13 1905 
1907 Gas explosion at Jacobs Creek PA coal mine kills 239 
1910 Rayon 1st commercially produced, Marcus Hook PA
1922 Mrs Theres Vaughn, 24, confessed in court to being 
   married 62 times 
1939 Russian air & ground attack against Finnish positions 
   near Summa 
1941 Hitler takes complete command of German Army 
1941 US Office of Censorship created to control info 
   pertaining to WWII 
1945 Austrian Republic re-establishes
1946 War breaks out in Indochina as Ho Chi Minh 
   attacks French in Hanoi
1949 Luxury passenger ship Aquitania demolished in 
   Garelock Scotland 
1950 Tibet's Dalai Lama flees Chinese invasion
1958 1st radio broadcast from space (recorded Christmas 
   message by President Eisenhower: "To all mankind, 
   America's wish for Peace on Earth & Good Will to 
   Men Everywhere") 
1961 British government begins decimal coin system
1962 Transit 5A1, 1st operational navigational satellite
1976 Piper Cherokee crashes into Baltimore Memorial Stadium 
   upper stands, 10 minutes after Colts lose 40-14 to Steelers; 
   No one seriously hurt 
1980 Iran requests $24 billion in US guarantees to free hostages 
1984 Wayne Gretzky, 23, is 18th & youngest NHL-er to 
score 1,000 points
1988 Unexploded WWII bomb found in Frankfurt, Germany-
   5,000 evacuated 
1991 Boris Yeltsin takes control of Kremlin
1995 Queen Elizabeth askes Prince Charles & Diana to divorce 
2012  smiled


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Download destinations 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Tuesday, December 18

Yes, this is a Merry Christmas site.
If you don't like that, and don't want to get paid for
Christmas Day and Boxing Day, then your generic holiday is
coming up the day after March 31.
Why the Second Amendment to try to keep the Government from overstepping it's bounds and getting too invasive into individual rights, when you can have such enlightened and benevolent leaders like Obama and Hillary and Pelosi take care of all your needs and wants? Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

England and America are two countries separated by a common language. --- George Bernard Shaw Your true value depends entirely on what you are compared with. --- Bob Wells Every war has two sides, and just two. One of them is called the enemy side. --- Tacitus
A man and women who had never met before, but who were both married to other people, found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a transcontinental train. Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly - he in the upper bunk and she in the lower. At 1:00 a.m. the man leaned over and gently woke the woman saying, "Ma'am, hate to bother you but would you be willing to reach into the closet and get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold." "I have a better idea" she replied, "just for tonight, let's pretend we are married." "Wow, that's a great idea," he exclaimed. "Good" she replied, "get your own damn blanket." After a moment of silence, he climbed down, and as he bent to pick up a blanket from the closet within her reach, while he was nicely mooning her, he trumpeted a ri-roaring fart.
>From Cookie Our dog, Longie, suddenly began barking daily at 4 a.m. Irritated and sleepy, my husband, Larry, searched the back yard for what might have disturbed this otherwise placid animal. For three mornings in a row he found nothing amiss. Then the dog woke up the neighborhood again at 3 a.m. with frantic barking. When Larry looked out the window, he discovered someone throwing pebbles to land near Longie. Larry hurried outside and confronted the culprit. Crouching on the other side of the fence was our very quiet neighbor, the last man you'd suspect of wrongdoing. My husband demanded to know what he was doing. "My mother-in-law is visiting," the embarrassed neighbor explained. "She said If she loses her beauty sleep one more night, she says she'll leave."
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Click on the picture for the large version
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Rebecca Jenks, 41, Deland, FL Jailed After Attacking Mother, Daughter And Another Inmate During Drunken Rampage Reported by The Weekly Vice Rebecca Jenks, a 41-year-old Florida woman was jailed Sunday after she allegedly kicked her 66-year-old mother and punched her 8-year-old daughter during a drunken rampage. According to the Volusia County Sheriff's Office, Jenks had been drinking Sunday afternoon when she apparently became angry and "out of control." When Jenks' mother tried to calm her down, Jenks reportedly pushed her mother and began kicking her. When Jenks' 8-year-old daughter stepped in to protect the older woman, Jenks pushed and then punched the girl in the head. A deputy later observed redness and swelling on the back of the child's neck. There was more trouble when deputies arrested Jenks and placed her into a holding cell. Investigators say Jenks slipped out of her handcuffs and began slapping another inmate who had been booked into the same holding cell. The inmate was unable to defend herself because she was in handcuffs, according to the arrest report. Jenks was booked into the Volusia County Jail and charged with battery, child abuse, battery on a person detained in jail and driving with a license that has been revoked.
Tech Support Pits From: Louise Re: Download directories Dear Webby There is a site I go to where I can download graphics. When I download them to downloads I can see what I have downloaded. When I go to downloads there is nothing there. Where did they disappear to? Also how would I make a new folder to put these downloads in so I can find them? I appreciate all the help you give me and others. Louise Dear Louise Windows downloads to the last location selected as a download destination, unless you tell it otherwise. Download something else, and you will see where it puts the stuff nowadays. You can also write down the name of the file you downloaded, and then do a search for it. A lot of your missing stuff will also be there. That is very slow, but it works. Use the File Explorer. Click on TOOOLS, Folder Options. Set it to use CLASSICAL mode and hit OK If necessary, click on Folders, so that it divides into 2 sections, with folders on the left and files on the right. NOW you have a useful tool. Find the root directory: (It's inconveniently hidden way down, in the My Computer icon) C:\ Highlight it. Go to the right side and Right-Click NEW Folder while "NewFolder" is still highlighted, type into it: 1down That will be your easy to find new download directory. Double-click it to go into it. Nothing there yet. Click on the icon to the left of the address bar on top, and drag it to an empty spot on the desktop, near the START button. Now you have a convenient and direct route to "1down". With Windows7 it is a lot worse. Windows7 likes putting all downloads into C:\Desktop\Owner\Downloads, or some dopey location like that, unless you do a deliberate Save As and specify a folder, for example F:\1Down on the removeable expansion drive. If you do that from DropBox, it will remember that, and the next time you save a pictrue from DropBox, it will put it into F:\1Down, as long as you use Save As. If you use just SAVE, it will put it to some dopey place. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Painted Stone Paper Weight Paint a flat, rounded, smooth rock as a paperweight. I used acrylic paints and then sprayed the painted rock with a clear varnish spray. By lnygaard Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

Thanks to Dianne for this: A man is giving a speech at his lodge meeting. He gets a bit carried away and talks for two hours. Finally, he realizes what he is doing and says; "I'm sorry I talked so long. I left my watch at home." A voice from the back of the room says, "There's a calendar behind you."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Thanks to Dave for this: My sister went to the department store to check out the bridal registry of our niece whose wedding was coming up soon. When my sister returned from the store, she tossed the gift list on a table and declared, "I think she's too young to get married." "Why do you say that?" I asked. "Because," she said, "they registered for video games."
» Sinkholes


Today in 
1621 English parliament accept unanimously, Protestation
1719 Thomas Fleet publishes "Mother Goose's 
   Melodies For Children" 
1774 Jews expelled from Prague, Bohemia & Moravia
1777 1st national Thanksgiving Day, commemorating 
   Burgoyne's surrender
1783 English king George III fires government of Portland
1813 British take Fort Niagara in the War of 1812
1839 1st celestial photograph (the moon) made in US, John Draper,
1849 William Bond obtains 1st photograph of Moon through 
   a telescope 
1917 Soviet regiment (Stalin/Lenin) declares Finland Independent 
1939 Finnish army recaptures Aglajarvi 
1941 Japanse troops land on Hong Kong 
1944 Destroyers "Hull", "Spence" & "Monaghan" sink in typhoon
1956 Japan admitted to the United Nations
1956 Israeli flag hoisted on Mount Sinai
1957 Shippingport Atomic Power Station, 1st nuke plant 
   to generate electricity 
1958 1st test project of Signal Communications by 
   Orbiting Relay Equipment
1966 Dr Seuss' "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" airs for 
   1st time on CBS 
1969 Britain abolishes death penalty 
1972 US begins its heaviest bombing of North Vietnam
1991 General Motors announces the closing of 21 plants
1996 TV industry executives agree to adopt a ratings system 
2012  smiled


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KVM switch and Audio 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Monday, December 17

Yes, this is a Merry Christmas site.
If you don't like that, and don't want to get paid for
Christmas Day and Boxing Day, then your generic holiday is
coming up the day after March 31.
NOTICE: Forwarding the stupid spam from the hysterical Anti-Gun fanatics just makes you look stupid. The guns of that terrorist in Newtown are irrelevant. He could have used home made bombs or poison gas made from household cleaners, or Chlorine made from salt water and electricity. In WWI over 10,000 Italian soldiers got killed in the famous "Bloodless Battle" with Chlorine gas. What is significant is that the terrorist bought a black SWAT team uniform and even more, that he bought a black, armored vest. THAT should have tipped somebody off, that he was planning some major mischief. Nobody buys an armored vest unless they expect to be shot at. Lots of people have lots of guns. So what? Most of them have never shot at anything ecept paper targets, or even at those. So what? Good for the economy. That's all. The significant and noticeable events were the purchase of the black uniform and especilally the military vest. THAT is what set that terrorist apart from the Millions of people, who have guns. THAT is what we have to watch for, not good people collecting guns and shooting widdle holes into paper targets. So, please send any phoney, sappy BS about guns into the trash, not to me. ------------ Yes, I know, Ezinefinder has weekend sickness, as usual. I wrote to them. That is all I can do. I have no idea why they fall down on weekends. Maybe, if you ask them nicely, they will tell you. You can try writing to support@cumuli.com Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Either the United States will destroy ignorance or ignorance will destroy the United States. --- W.E.B. Du Bois, Speech at Harpers Ferry, Virginia, August 1906 Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves. --- Abraham Lincoln Tarot Reading is the art of describing others as they would like to see themselves. --- Socratex Federal Express had a terrific obstacle to overcome: They had to convince people that anything with the word "Federal" in it could be speedy.
>From Jessica A woman came to the psychiatrist worried. "Doctor," she said, "I can't sleep at night. When I'm in the next room, I have this dreadful fear that I won't hear the baby if he falls out of the crib at night. What should I do?" "Easy," said the doctor. "Just take the carpet off the floor. You'll hear him."
A new doctor had arrived in town. He could cure anything and anybody. Everyone was amazed with what he could do - everyone except for Mr. Thompson, the town skeptic. Grumpy old Mr. Thompson went to visit this 'miracle doctor' to prove that he wasn't anybody special. When it was time for his appointment he told the doctor, "Hey, doc, I've lost my sense of taste. I can't taste nothin', so what are ya goin' to do?" For that you got to pay first. $100 bucks. After he got paid, the doctor scratched his head and mumbled to himself a little, then told Mr. Thompson, "What you need is jar number 47." So the doctor brought the jar out, opened it, and told Mr. Thompson to taste it. He tasted it and immediately spit it out, "This is gross!" he yelled. "Looks like I just restored your sense of taste Mr. Thompson," said the doctor. So Mr. Thompson went home.... very mad. One month later, Mr. Thompson decides to go back to the doctor and try once again to expose him as a fake, by complaining of a new problem. "Doc," he started, "I can't remember anything!" "Hmmm, can't remember anything? Like paying your bills? In that case, you have to pay in dvance. 100 bucks." Thinking he had the doctor stumped now, he waited as the doctor scratched his head, mumbled to himself a little, and told Mr. Thompson, "What you need is .... jar number 47, it's......" But before the doctor could finish his sentence, Mr. Thompson was cured and fled the room!
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Click on the picture for the large version
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Maurice Henderson, 25, Albuquerque, NM Jailed for Bringing Three Young Children To Prostitution Sting Reported by The Weekly Vice Maurice Henderson, a 25-year-old New Mexico man, was jailed Saturday after he allegedly brought his three children along to solicit a prostitute. According to Albuquerque Police, officers had set up a prostitution sting at a local motel when Hernandez entered the motel and paid a female undercover officer $100 for sex. During Henderson's arrest, he advised officers that he had three children waiting for him outside in his car. When officers checked the car, they found three children, ages 1, 2, and 6, waiting alone in the vehicle. Investigators say the children did not have coats with them, and the temperature was "considerably cold" that night. The children were released into the custody of Henderson's wife a short time later. Henderson was booked into jail and charged with three counts of child abuse and 1 count of suspicion of soliciting a prostitute.
Tech Support Pits From: Robin Re: KVM plus Audio switch Dear Webby Starting soon I will have 2 computers on my desk. I understand you can connect both computers with a KVM switch but will connecting 2 computers to one monitor sacrifice performance? I see that there is a switch which includes a speaker and microphone but I don't think that is necessary..I only need speakers for one computer, which I already have..I don't think including an audio set with the switch means you won't have audio unless you get a switch with this feature, but I'm not sure. Your opinion? Thanks....R.J. Dear Robin There is no loss of hardware performance. You only need an audio switch included if you run the audio through your home or office stereo, like I do. However, if you use the little squeakers, that come with computers, connected to each machine, then each will have it's own sound anyway. Personally, I did not bother with an audio switch. Computer 1 goes to the stereo, computer 2 uses it's own squeakers. Those are plenty good enough for error beeps and announcement pings. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Flat Paper Bows for Shipped Packages Do you have to mail gifts and don't want the bows to be mashed, yet don't want to leave them "plain?" Cut out pictures of pretty bows or make flat "bows" and "ribbons" out of construction paper and glue them on. You could play with this idea and have creative fun with it. By Sid from Bristol, TN Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

Thanks to Dianne for this story: On my 15th birthday, I opened a package from my mom and sister. Out came a beauty case containing samples of my very own makeup. "Oh, neat," my dad said excitedly, "a tackle box!" My mother and sister explained that it was a beauty kit, not a tackle box. As I opened it up and showed everyone the eye shadow, mascara, and rouge, my father leaned over to my mother and whispered, "I told you it was a tackle box. Just look at all those lures."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Mildred, the church gossip, and self-appointed monitor of the church's morals, kept sticking her nose into other people's business. Several members did not approve of her extra curricular activities, but feared her enough to maintain their silence. She made a mistake, however, when she accused George, a new member, of being an alcoholic after she saw his old pickup parked in front of the town's only bar one afternoon. She emphatically told George and several others that everyone seeing it there would know what he was doing. George, a man of few words, stared at her for a moment and just turned and walked away. He didn't explain, defend, or deny. He said nothing. Later that evening, George and his three apprentices quietly parked their pickups in front of Mildred's house....walked home and left them there all night!
» Sinkholes


Today in 
1538 Pope Paul III excommunicated England's King Henry VIII
1572 Spanish army starts fires in Haarlem Netherlands
1638 French/Swedish troops occupy Breisach on the Rhine
1718 England declares war on Spain
1745 Bonnie Prince Charles army retreats to Scotland 
1777 France recognizes independence of English colonies in 
   America 
1791 NYC traffic regulation creates 1st 1-way street 
1821 Kentucky abolishes debtors prisons 
1862 General US Grant issues order #11, expelling Jews 
   from Tennessee 
1885 France declares Madagascar a protectorate 
1895 George Brownell patents a machine to make paper twine
1900 1st prize of 100,000 francs offered for communications 
   with extraterrestrials. Martians excluded-considered too easy 
NOW he tells me!
1900 New Ellis Island Immigration station completed 
   costing $1.5 million
1903 At 10:35 AM, 1st sustained motorized aircraft flight 
   (Orville Wright)   
1914 Jews are expelled from Tel Aviv by Turkish authorities 
1914 Austrian troops beat Russians in Limanova Poland
1914 Great Britain declares Egypt a protectorate
1919 Austria parliament approves 8-hour day 
1920 Japan receives League of Nations mandate over 
   Pacific islands 
1924 1st US diesel electric locomotive enters service, Bronx NY
1926 German Marx government falls due to cooperation 
   with red army 
1927 US sub 'S-4' sinks after collision kills all 34 aboard 
1939 German pocket battleship Graf Spee scuttled by 
   its crew off Uruguay after refuge was refused.
1942 Allies in London sentence German POWs as war criminals
1943 Transport 63 departs with French Jews to Nazi-Germany 
1944 US Army announces end of excluding Japanese-Americans 
   from West Coast; Japanese-Americans are released from 
   concentrationtion camps 
1944 US destroyers sink in storm off Philippines, 790 killed
1946 Confiscated V-2 rocket reaches 183 km, White Sands, NM 
1947 New York struck by a blizzard, resulting in 27" of snow
1954 1st fully automated railroad freight yard (Gary IN) 
1957 US successfully test-fires Atlas intercontinental 
   ballistic missile 
1965 British government proclaims end of oil-embargo 
   against Rhodesia 
1971 Cease-fire between India & Pakistan in Kashmir 
1973 Arab terrorists shoot passengers on Boeing 737 to Kuwait 
1979 Budweiser rocket car reaches 1190 kph
1992 General Suwa finds tooth of 4.4 million year old 
   Australopithecus ramidus 
2012  smiled


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Will a Canonscan work with Windows7? 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Sunday, December 16

Yes, this is a Merry Christmas site.
If you don't like that, and don't want to get paid for
Christmas Day and Boxing Day, then your generic holiday is
coming up the day after March 31.
NOTICE: Forwarding the stupid spam from the Anti-Gun fanatics just makes you look stupid. Look at the facts! Areas with the tightest gun controls have the most gun related incidents. Afghanistan is safer than those parts of the US, where guns are theoretically restricted! DUH! So quit forwarding the lies and try some thinking! There was a school massacre in China around the same time. No gun involved, just a knife. 26 kids. Consider: Bombs and poison gas can be made from common household cleaners mixed in proper proportions, and entire schools wiped out with them. The more people rely on the Government to provide their wants and needs, the more will become disillusioned and since they have not learned to cope on their own, they snap. We should not whine and snivel about gun controls, but make sure the principals and vice principals are ARMED and TRAINED to cope with those situations, no matter whether the terrorists use guns or knives or bombs or gas. They will still do their evil thing, but at least they won't do it in schools. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore. --- Ogden Nash What some call health, if purchased by perpetual anxiety about diet, isn't much better than tedious disease. --- George Dennison Prentice The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously. --- Hubert H. Humphrey
In the cafeteria on the first day of spring semester at Kent State University, I saw three students hard at work on their calculators. Stunned that they had received such an obviously tough problem so early in the semester, I asked them what their assignment was. One girl looked at me and replied, "We're figuring out how many days until spring break."
Rabbi Morris Schleppman was a perfectionist and demanded the very best of his pupils. So it was only to be expected that he would get furious when Little Johnny handed in a poor paper. "This is the worst Yiddish essay it has ever been my misfortune to read," ranted the rabbi. "It has so many mistakes I can't understand how one person would have made all these mistakes." "It wasn't just one person," replied Little Johnny defensively. "My father helped me."
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Thanks to Dianne for sending this picture: Click on the picture for the large version Lighthouse at Lake Michigan Without Gulible Warming it would be even worse!
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Jennifer Melissa Herring, 37, Myrtle Beach, NC Jailed After Refusing To Stop For Officer, Demanding $300,000 To Pull Over Reported by The Weekly Vice Jennifer Melissa Herring, a 37-year-old Myrtle Beach woman was jailed Monday after she allegedly refused to stop for police, then called 911 and demanded $300,000 to pull over. According to the Brunswick County Sheriff's Office, deputies were attempting to pull Herring over for speeding Monday night when she refused to stop. During the chase, Herring reportedly called 911 and told a dispatcher that she would not stop unless officers promised to pay her $300,000. Officers continued to follow Herring to a private driveway where she was taken into custody. Investigators say officers activated their lights when they spotted Herring traveling 70 mph in a 45 mph zone. Herring was also found to be intoxicated and driving on a revoked license. She was booked into jail and charged with driving while impaired, felony fleeing to elude arrest, and driving while her license is revoked. She was also charged with failing to appear in court in an unrelated driving while impaired incident. Failing to appear usually means no more bail, ever.
Tech Support Pits From: dan Re: Will a Canoscan lide 200 work in Windos7? Dear Webby will a canon canoscan lide 200 work in windows7 ? thanks in advance, dan Dear Dan Most likely it will. Windows7 has all the drivers for old scanners and printers, and in cases, where it doesn't, it assists you in downloading and installing them. It is not like Vista, that was released long before all the necessary drivers had been collected and made available. It will probably be slower than in XP, but it should work OK. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Craft Uses for Nail Polish When making crafty things such as cards, instead of glitter I always use clear nail polish with glitter in it. You can get it at any dollar store and it makes no mess. You just paint it on where you want the glitter and you'll have a pretty craft with no mess! :) By Hallie from Black Hawk, SD Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

One fine day, a bus driver went to the bus garage, started his bus, and drove off along the route. No problems for the first few stops. A few people got on, a few got off, and things went generally well. At the next stop, however, a big hulk of a guy got on. Six feet eight, built like a wrestler, arms hanging down to the ground. He glared at the driver and said, "Big John doesn't pay!" and sat down at the back. Did I mention that the driver was five three, thin, and basically meek? Naturally, he didn't argue with Big John, but he wasn't happy about it. The next day the same thing happened. Big John got on again, made a big show of refusing to pay, and sat down. And the next day, and the one after that, and so forth. This grated on the bus driver, who started losing sleep over the way Big John was taking advantage of him. Finally, he could stand it no longer. He signed up for body building courses, karate judo, and all that good stuff. By the end of the summer, he had become quite strong; what's more, he felt really good about himself. So on the next Monday, when Big John once again got on the bus and said, "Big John doesn't pay!," The driver stood up, glared back at the passenger, and screamed "AND WHY NOT?!?!" With a surprised look on his face, Big John replied, "Big John has a whole year bus pass."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
>From Ross One day an employee came into work with both of her ears bandaged. Her boss asked her what happened to her ears. "Yesterday I was ironing a shirt when the phone rang and I accidentally answered the iron instead of the phone!" "Well," the boss said, "that explains one ear, but what about the other?" "The neighbor called to ask what all the screaming and swearing was about!"
» Calorie Free Chocolates


Today in 
1431 King Henry VI of England crowned king of France 
1577 Danzig surrenders to troops of Polish king István Báthory 
1617 Spanish viceroy Hernando Arias de Saavedra founds 
   provinces Río de la Plata (Argentina)/Guaira (Paraguay) 
1631 Mount Vesuvius, Italy erupts, destroys 6 villages & kills 4,000 1740 Prussian Libya falls to Silezie
1761 Russian army occupies Kolberg 
1773 Big tea party in Boston harbor-Indians welcome (Boston Tea Party)
1809 Napoleon Bonaparte divorces Empress Josephine
1835 Fire consumes over 600 buildings in New York NY
1864 Battle of Nashville ends after 4400 casualities 
1897 1st submarine with an internal combustion engine demonstrated 
1912 Austria-Hungary engage in conflict with Serbia
1915 Albert Einstein publishes his "General Theory of Relativity" 
1920 Over 180,000 die when 8.6 earthquake destroys 
   15,000² miles (Kansu China) 
1932 Heavy earthquake ravages Kansu China, 70,000 killed
1940 British air raid on Mannheim
1941 Sarawak occupied by the Japanese
1942 Hitler orders combat against partisans in Russia & Balkan 
1944 Battle of the Bulge begins in Belgium
1944 German V-2 strikes Antwerp bioscope (638 kill)
1950 Truman proclaims state of emergency against 
   "Communist imperialism" (what Obama is trying for)
1962 David Lean's "Lawrence of Arabia" premieres
1970 1st successful landing on Venus (USSR) 
1971 Bangladesh (East Pakistan) declares 
   independence from Pakistan 
1978 Ronald Reagan denounces President Jimmy Carter's 
   recognition of China People's Republic 
1990 Reverend Jean-Betrand Aristide elected President of Haiti 
1992 Israel orders deportation of 415 Palestinians after 
   escalating terrorist activity 
1997 President Clinton names his Labrador retriever, "Buddy" 
2012  smiled


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Is the Chrome browser OK ? 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Saturday, December 15 Thank you, John B. ! I am as shocked and saddened about the Connecticot school massacre, but since I don'thave any more news about it than you do, I am not going to jump to conclusions and comment about it. There are enough others already busy doing that. Still Hanukhah! Time to panic about putting up the Christmas lights. One more day to untangle them. This is getting serious! Well, I got the X-10 plug and remote control ready. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

I've gone into hundreds of [fortune-teller's parlors], and have been told thousands of things, but nobody ever told me I was a policewoman getting ready to arrest her. --- New York City detective Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact. --- George Eliot
Jill reported for her university final exam which consisted of "true/false" type questions. She took her seat in the examination hall, stared at the question paper for five minutes. In a fit of inspiration, she took her purse out, removed a coin and started tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet: true for heads and false for tails. Within thirty minutes she was all done, whereas the rest of the class was still working furiously. During the last few minutes, she was seen desperately throwing the coin, swearing and sweating. The moderator, alarmed, approached her and asked what is going on. "I finished the exam in a half hour," she said. "Now I'm rechecking my answers."
Our supervisor recently made a casual comment about my shaggy mane of hair. He then went on to extol the virtues of a good haircut, which, he insisted, makes an elderly man look younger and a younger man seem more mature. "How would a haircut make a middle-aged man like me appear?" I asked. "Still employed," he answered.
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Thanks to Dianne for sending this picture: Click on the picture for the large version
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Sara Ball, 29, Boise, Idaho Jailed After Abandoning Baby In The Middle Of The Night, Refusing To Come Get Baby The Next Day Reported by The Weekly Vice Sara Ball, a 29-year-old Boise woman was jailed Monday after she allegedly took her baby to the home of an acquaintance, then abandoned the child there. According to Boise Police, officers were called to a residence on December 2nd after Ball took her infant son to the home of an acquaintance to spend the night, but ended up deserting the child instead. Investigators say Ball snuck out of the house sometime during the night and was gone the next morning. She also left the child without food or diapers. When the acquaintance called Ball the next day, Ball refused to come get her child or drop off provisions for the child. She later contacted her parole officer and turned herself in when she learned that police were looking for her. The child was declared to be in imminent danger and was placed into the custody of the Idaho Department of Health and Welfare. Ball was booked into jail and charged with felony desertion of nonsupport a child. Since she had been on parole and had been expeted to be on good behavior, she won't get bail.
Tech Support Pits From: Allice Re: Chrome browser Dear Webby At work I have a really lousy monitor with very coarse resoluton, that I am not allowed to change. A friend suggested I use the Chroome browser, because it has less stuff at the top taking up space. How good is that brwser? Allice Dear Allice The Google Chrome browser is good and reliable. If you never use any of the "stuff at the top" of FireFox, then by all means switch to Chrome. It is like an all chrome Chopper motorcycle, wit all unnecessary stuff chopped and just the bare essential left, but those chromed and polished. Especially for work purposes for daily checking rates or quotes on the same sites, it works very well. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Make Funnel From Envelope Corner A corner cut from an envelope and pierced at the point makes a good funnel for filling salt and pepper shakers. By JodiT from Aurora, CO Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

Engineering classes at the University of Maryland are tough, and struggling students sometimes go to extremes in order to pass. Grading exams one semester, I got to this question: "What is the relationship between kinetic and potential energy?" One student, obviously stumped, decided to get clever and wrote, "As far as I know, they're just friends, but there could be something else going on there."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
A young vampire bat came flapping in from the night, covered in fresh blood, and perched himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep. Before long, all the other bats smelled the blood and began hassling him about where he got it. He was tired and needing a rest, so he told them to please leave him alone. However, it was clear that he wasn't going to get any sleep until he satisfied their curiosity. "OK!" he said with exasperation, "follow me," and he flew out of the cave with hundreds of bats following close behind him. Down through the valley they went, across the river and into the deep forest. Finally he slowed down and all the other bats excitedly gathered around him. "Do you see that tree over there?" he asked. "Yes, yes, yes!" the bats all screamed in a frenzy. "Good," said the first bat, "Because I DIDN'T!"
» Calorie Free Chocolates


Today in 
1488 Bartholomeus Diaz returns to Portugal after sailing 
   round Cape of Good Hope 
1593 State of Holland grants patent on windmill with crankshaft 
1612 Simon Marius, is 1st to observe Andromeda galaxy 
   through a telescope 
1664 English colonizing Connecticut
1820 1st general pharmacopoeia in US published, Boston 
1854 1st street-cleaning machine in US 1st used in Philadelphia 
1877 Thomas Edison patents phonograph 
1891 James Naismith invents basketball (Canada) 
1914 Battle of Lódz ends; Russians retreat toward Moscow
1914 British fleet forfeits chance to destroy German fleet
1914 Swedish troops over run Belgrade in Austria-Hungary
1916 French defeat Germans in WWI Battle of Verdun 
1939 1st commercial manufacture of nylon yarn, Seaford DE 
1939 World premiere of "Gone With The Wind" in Atlanta GA 
1941 USS Swordfish becomes 1st US sub to sink a Japanese ship
1964 Canada adopts maple leaf flag 
1964 1st time 4 people in space
1965 Gemini 6 launched; makes 1st rendezvous in space 
  (with Gemini 7) 
1967 Beatles release "Christmas Time is Here Again" 
1970 Soviet Venera 7 is 1st spacecraft to land on 
   another planet (Venus) 
1973 American Psychiatric Association declares homosexuality 
   is not mental illness
1979 Deposed Shah of Iran leaves US for Panamá 
1982 Roy Williams, Teamsters president, & 4 others convicted 
   of bribery 
1983 Last 80 US combat soldiers in Grenada withdrew
1995 Playboy goes back on sale after 36 year ban in Ireland 
2012  smiled


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What is the best way to transfer files from old to new computer? 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Friday, December 14. Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops! Still Hanukhah! No panic yet about putting up the Christmas lights. Two more days to untangle them. This is getting serious! Well, I got the X-10 plug and remote control ready. Yesterday's "Concubine" joke by Dr Bill Farmer was supposed to go into the Valentines file. OOOPS. Sorry about that. Have FUN! DearWebby By the way, Home4Christmas.com is for sale. Somebody could make a nice profit with a domain like that!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Risk comes from not knowing what you're doing." --- Warren Buffett
Two assassins are hired to kill a dictator in South America. They follow his every move for months, and find out that every day at noon he goes outside and does his stretching exercises. So the assassins set up shop right across the street, get all of their sights set, load the guns, and have everything ready to go. Noon comes, no dictator......10 minutes longer........no dictator. One assassin turns to the other and says, "Gee, I hope nothing happened to him."
Linda and Marion were comparing notes on the difficulties of running a small business. "I started a new practice last year," Linda said. "I insist that each of my employees take at least a week off every three months." "Why in the world would you do that?" Marion asked. "It's the best way I know of to learn which ones I can do without," Linda said.
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Click on the picture for the large version Milky Way
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to K.H.M, 37, and A. Mc., 35 in Charleston, SC Recently Married Couple Jailed After Brawling Over TV Remote Reported by The Weekly Vice Recently married couple, K. M, 37, and A. Mc., 35, were jailed Monday after they allegedly got into a physical confrontation over a missing tv remote. According to Charleston Police, officers were dispatched to the Charleston Place Hotel Monday evening after guests of the hotel called 911 and reported a domestic disturbance. Arriving officers were directed to K. M., who appeared upset and trembling, according to the arrest affidavit. M. told officers the she and her husband were lying in bed watching television when he complained about not being able to find the remote control. M. stated that she found the remote and threw it at him, striking him with it. Mc. became angry and retaliated by punching his wife in the face with a closed fist. M. responded by biting M. on the left arm. When officers questioned Mc., he appeared heavily intoxicated and told officers that "nothing happened." M. and Mc. were booked into the Charleston County Detention Center and charged with domestic violence. The couple were married in June of this year.
Tech Support Pits Nobody, not even the most diehard Microsoft toadies, tried to correct me about registry locked Microsoft Word files. So, until further notice, when you see that "registry locked" error,when trying to open old .doc files, don't waste more time on them. From: Ron Re: Transfer files from old to new computer Dear Webby I bought a newer computer and want to transfer files. What is the best way to transfer files. I do have an external hard drive or can I plug them together. I am going from XP to Windows 7. By the way what do you think of Acer laptops? Thanks as always. Ron Dear Ron Acer is OK. If it is not too late, get the Windows PLUS option, with XP pre-installed at the factory, or if it is too late for that, try to get it by downloading. Yes, external hard drive is probably best, unless you have a router and can network the old and new machines. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Make Funnel From Envelope Corner A corner cut from an envelope and pierced at the point makes a good funnel for filling salt and pepper shakers. By JodiT from Aurora, CO Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

A mother and a daughter are shopping in the mall, when the mother eyes an expensive fur coat. "This year," she says, "I think that I will buy my present instead of making you and dad shop for me." The daughter nods in agreement. "And I think this fur coat would be perfect too." The daughter protests, "But mom, some dumb, helpless, poor creature has to suffer so that you can have this." "Don't worry honey," says the mother, "your father won't get the bill for a few weeks."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards. One day they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said, "Now don't get mad at me . . . I know we've been friends for a long time, but I just can't remember your name. I've thought and thought, but I just can't recall. Please tell me what your name is." Her friend glared at her. For at least three minutes she just looked at her. Finally she said, "How soon do you need to know?"
» High Level Ice & Snow


Today in 
  644 Osman ibn Affan appointed 3rd Kalif of islam
1287 Zuider Zee seawall collapses with loss of 50,000 lives
1656 Artificial pearls 1st manufactured by M Jacquin in Paris
1793 1st state road authorized, Frankfort KY to Cincinnati OH 
1793 1st state road authorized, Frankfort KY to Cincinnati OH 
1911 South Pole 1st reached, by Norwegian Roald Amundsen
1913 Greece formally takes possession of Crete
1927 Iraq gains independence from Britain, but 
   British troops remain 
1934 1st streamlined steam locomotive introduced (Albany NY) 
1937 Japanese troops conquer/plunder Nanjing 
1939 Soviet Union attacks Finland - League of Nations
    drops Soviet Union
1941 Prime Minister Winston Churchill travels to US on 
  board HMS Duke of York
1941 U-557 torpedoes British cruiser Galatea 
1967 DNA created in a test tube 
1971 Golden Gate Bridge lights out all night due to power failure
1977 Egypt & Israel representatives gather in Cairo for 
   1st formal peace conference 
1981 Israel annexes Golan Heights (seized from 
   Syria in war of 1967) 
1986 Voyager, piloted by Dick Rutan and Jeana Yeager, 
  takes off from Edwards AFB, California on 1st non-stop, 
  non-refueled flight around the world 
1988 Spanish general strike to protest austerity measures 
1991 Ferry boat Salem Express sinks in Red Sea, 476 killed 
1997 Phoenix Coyote Mike Gartner is 5th NHLer to score 700 goals 
2012  smiled


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Can you open an MS Office doc that is locked with a registry policy setting? 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Thursday, December 13 Still Hanukhah! No panic yet about putting up the Christmas lights. I got three more days to untangle them. Have FUN! DearWebby By the way, Home4Christmas.com is for sale. Somebody could make a nice profit with a domain like that!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

The follies which a man regrets most, in his life, are those which he didn't commit when he had the opportunity. --- Helen Rowland I once went for a job at an airline. The interviewer asked me why I wanted to be a stewardess, and I told her -- it would be a great chance to meet men. She looked at me and said, "But you can meet men anywhere." I said, "Strapped down?" --- Martha Raye
>From Dave R A lawyer and a senior citizen are sitting next to each other on a long flight. The lawyer is thinking that pensioners are so dumb that he could get one over on them easily. So, the lawyer asks if the pensioner would like to play a fun game. The pensioner is tired and just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists, saying that the game is a lot of fun. "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me only £5.00. Then you ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you £500.00," he says. This catches the pensioner's attention and, to keep the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. The lawyer asks the first question. "What's the distance from the Earth to the Moon?" The pensioner doesn't say a word, but reaches into his pocket, pulls out a five-Pound note, and hands it to the lawyer. Now, it's the pensioner's turn. He asks the lawyer, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four?" The lawyer uses his laptop to search all references he can find on the Net. He sends E-mails to all the smart friends he knows; all to no avail. After an hour of searching, he finally gives up. He wakes the pensioner and hands him £500.00. The pensioner pockets the £500.00 and goes right back to sleep. The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He wakes the pensioner up and asks, "Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four?" The pensioner reaches into his pocket, hands the lawyer £5.00, and goes back to sleep.
The homeowner was delighted with the way the painter had done all the work on his house. "You did a great job." he said and handed the man a check. "Also, as a bonus, here's an extra $80 to take the missus out to dinner and a movie." Later that night, the doorbell rang and it was the painter. Thinking the man had forgotten something he asked, "What's the matter, did you forget something?" "Nope." replied the painter. "I'm just here to take your missus out to dinner and a movie like I promised."
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Thanks to Lillemor for sending this pictrue t aken by her son Mikel in Boca Raton, Florida Click on the picture for the large version Boca Raton, Florida
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Lindsey Trimble, 28, Fresno, Calif Lindsey Trimble: Cutest Sex Offending Married Teacher Of The Week Reported by The Weekly Vice Lindsey Trimble, a 28-year-old science teacher at Clovis High School, was jailed Thursday after she allegedly had sex with a student. According to Clovis police, an investigation was launched after school administrators contacted police and advised them that Trimble allegedly had sex with a 17-year-old student. Investigators say Trimble, who is married, had sex with the student multiple times at homes in Fresno County. The alleged sexual relationship took place between March and July of this year. Trimble reportedly resigned her position at the school on the same day of her arrest. She was booked at the Clovis Police Department and charged with having sex with a minor and oral copulation of a minor. She was temporarily released after posting $55,000 bail, and her teaching career is trashed.
Tech Support Pits From: Dianne Re: Can you open an MS Office doc that is locked with a registry policy setting? Dear Webby Can you open this Doc from an older version of MS WORD for me? I have MS-Office 2007, but can't open it. It says it is locked by a Registry Policy Setting. Dianne Dear Dianne Some previous Microsft Windows update locked certain old docs, because somebody in Redmond considers them to be unsafe. Consider that doc to be frozen for the forseeable future. If you have lots of time, there are some tedious rigmaroles that you can try, but most likely, you still can't open that old doc. Even if you waste time tochange that Registry Setting, you still can't open that doc. Open Office and Word Perfect won't touch a registry locked MS-WORD Doc either. Apparently MS-Office 2010 may be able to almost open that locked doc in a view-only mode, similar to a fax picture. If that doc is not important enough to pay for MS Office 2010, you will just have to forget it it for now. It is possible that some day somebody will write a converter, but for now it is locked up like a quarantined virus. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Light Candles and Pilot Lights With A Spaghetti Noodle Use uncooked spaghetti or spaghettini to light gas furnaces, fireplaces, BBQs, gas lamps, gas fridges, gas ranges, anything with a pilot light, even candles. Source: Lighting my Servel propane fridge in the 70's to 2000. By DearWebby from Black Diamond, AB Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

An oldie for Valentine's day: Two daughters of a recently widowed mother, decided the new young, single Pastor would be a good new Daddy. To get the romance started for their shy Mom, they decided to send a Valentine to the Pastor from their Mother. They created their own beutiful heart shaped valentine, and decided the verse had to have something biblical -- searching the scripture they came up with the perfect rhyme. The pastor opened his valentine to read: "If you will be my Valentine, I will be your Concubine."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Morris bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Hnnukhah. A friend of his said, "I thought she wanted one of those sporty 4-Wheel drive vehicles." "She did," he replied. "But where was I gonna find a fake Jeep?"
» Christmas Lights


Today in 
1577 Sir Francis Drake sets sail from England to go around the world 
1642 New Zealand discovered by Dutch navigator Abel Tasman
1816 Patent for a dry dock issued to John Adamson, Boston 
1843 "A Christmas Carol" by Charles Dickens published, 
   6,000 copies sold 
1903 Italo Marcioni patents the ice cream cone (New Jersey) 
1903 Wright Brothers make 1st flight at Kittyhawk 
1916 Avalanches kill 10,000 Austrian & Italian troops in 
  24 hours in Tyrol 
1918 US army of occupation crosses the Rhine, enters Germany
1919 Ross & Smith land in Australia from a flight from London 
1920 F Pease's interferometer measures 1st stellar 
   diameter (Betelgeuse) 
1928 Clip-on tie designed
1941 U-81 torpedoes British aircraft carrier Ark Royal 
1943 150 US Marauders bomb Schiphol 
1944 Japanese kamikaze crashes into US cruiser Nashville, kills 138
1949 Knesset votes to transfer Israel's capitol to Jerusalem 
1959 Archbishop Makarios elected 1st President of Cyprus 
1962 Relay 1 communication satellite launched 
1966 1st US bombing of Hanoi 
1967 Unsuccessful coup against Greek King Constantine II 
1974 Malta becomes a republic
1981 Polish government declares martial law, arrests Solidarity activists 
1982 Earthquake hits Northern Yemen; 2,000 die
1989 Forced repatriation of Vietnamese in Hong Kong 
1993 Deadline for Israeli troop withdrawal from Gaza, they don't 
1995 US Federal Court votes that Cable companies 
  must carry local stations 
2012  smiled


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How do I change an MS Office document to an HTML Web Page? 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Wednesday, December 12 Still Hanukhah! No panic yet about putting up the Christmas lights. I got four more days to untangle them. Have FUN! DearWebby By the way, Home4Christmas.com is for sale. Somebody could make a nice profit with a domain like that!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

The follies which a man regrets most, in his life, are those which he didn't commit when he had the opportunity. --- Helen Rowland
The warden, addressing the three instigators of a failed prison riot, said, "I would like to know two things. First: Why did you revolt? Second: How did you get out of your cell?" One of the three men stepped forward, "Warden, we rebelled because the food is awful." "I see. And what did you use to break the bars?" The warden asked. Replied the spokesman, "French Toast."
Burglars broke into a bank after hours and found one lone teller trying to balance his books. After forcing him to open the vault, they tied and gagged him. Quickly tossing all the cash into a duffel bag, they were about to leave when they heard the teller making noises through his gag. Curious, they loosened it and asked what he was trying to say, "Take my balance sheet too," he gasped, "I'm short $70,000."
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Click on the picture for the large version Mt Nimbus, Canada
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Kayla Ashlyn Bonkowski, 19, Mount Pleasant, Michigan Jailed for Adding Bleach To Roommate's Drink, Told Detectives Roommate Was "Mean" Reported by The Weekly Vice Kayla Ashlyn Bonkowski, a 19-year-old Central Michigan University student, was jailed after she allegedly poisoned her roommate with bleach because she "thought she was mean". According to Michigan State Police, the victim, 20-year-old Emily Joseph was hospitalized after drinking a cup of iced tea that Bonkowski had tainted with bleach. When detectives questioned Bonkowski, she allegedly admitted to spraying bleach into her roommate's drink because the two had quarreled over dirty dishes. Bonkowski told investigators that she thought Joseph was "mean." Bonkowski was booked into jail and charged with one felony count of poisoning food, drink, medicine, and/or water supply. She was released after posting a $2,000 cash bond.
Tech Support Pits From: Ada Re: How do I change an MS Office doc to an HTML web page? Dear Webby I need to change a few very basic documents to HTML, so that they can be viewed as web pages, and updated occasonally. One person told me to just Save it As HTML, but the IT lady told me that if I do that, it would be such a useless mess, that it would be easier to re-write the pages from scratch than trying to edit them, and that she would NOT have anything to do with that. What is the alternative? Ada Dear Ada Use Open office. It is free. Unlike MS-Office, it produces clean HTML, that can be edited and updated quickly and easiy. I agree with your IT lady, MS-Office produces an awful mess when saving AS HTML, and only the most loyal Microsoft toadies will even attempt to edit it, and only while getting paid overtime, of course. Open Office can pick up MS Office documents, and also those produced by Corel Word-Perfect, and many others, and it can even save it in those formats. Even if you use MS-Office most of the time, to save to HTML most definitely use Open Office. You will find various other tasks, that also go much easier with Open Office. It is good to have it installed just for those occasions, when you have to go just a bit further. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Christmas Tree Treatment This is a solution that will help your Christmas tree last longer! Ingredients: 1 gal. water 3/4 cup sugar 3 Tbsp. bleach Directions: This solution may be used to keep a Christmas tree in good health. Use whatever amount you need on your Christmas tree. By Robin from Washington, IA Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

A three-year-old in our congregation watches football games with his father and knows some of the signals the referee makes. On a recent Sunday as the pastor raised his hands high to offer a blessing, the child interrupted the service by shouting, "Touchdown!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
When I first started college, the Dean came in and said "Good Morning" to all of us. When we echoed back to him, he responded "Ah, you're Freshmen." He explained. "When you walk in and say good morning, and they say good morning back, it's Freshmen. When they put their newspapers down and open their books, it's Sophomores. When they look up so they can see the instructor over the tops of the newspapers, it's juniors. When they put their feet up on the desks and keep reading, it's seniors." "When you walk in and say good morning, and they write it down, it's graduate students."
» Deep Sea Critters


Today in 
0627 Battle at Nineveh: Byzantine emperor Heraclius beats Perzen
1098 1st Crusaders capture & plunder Mara Syria 
1474 Isabella crowns herself queen of Castile & Aragon 
1858 1st Canadian coins circulated (1¢, 5¢, 10¢ & 20¢) 
1871 Jules Janssen discovers dark lines in solar corona spectrum
1913 Hebrew language officially used to teach in Palestinian schools
1915 1st all-metal aircraft (Junkers J.1) flown at Dessau Germany 
1915 Russian troops overrun Hamadan, Persia 
1917 Worst train disaster (derailment near mouth of Mount Cenis 
   tunnel) ever (Modane France-543 French troops killed) 
1925 Arthur Heinman coins term "motel", opens Motel Inn, 
   San Luis Obispo 
1925 Last Qajar Shah of Iran deposed; Rexa Shah Pahlavi takes over
1925 Cossack officer/ex-premier Reza Chan becomes shah of Persia 
1932 USSR & China resume diplomatic relations
1936 Chinese leader Chiang Kai-shek declares war on Japan 
1937 Japanese aircraft shell & sink US gunboat Panay on 
  Yangtze River in China. (Japan apologized & eventually paid 
   US $2.2 million in reparations) 
1946 UN accepts 6 Manhattan blocks as a gift from Rockefeller
1946 Tide detergent introduced 
1957 US announces manufacture of Borazon (harder than diamond) 
1969 Bomb attack on bank in Milan, 14 killed
1979 Rhodesia becomes the independent nation of Zimbabwe 
1982 $9,800,000 in cash stolen from money transport car in 
   New York NY 
1986 Microlite aircraft circles world non-stop
1997 Federal judge sentences Autumn Jackson, who claims 
   to be Bill Cosby's daughter, to 26 months for trying to extort 
   $40 million from him 
1997 Japanese Maglev train claims world speed record at 332 MPH
2012  smiled


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How do I change the default font in MS Office 2007? 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Tuesday, December 11 The Italian elections coming up in february should be quite interesting. Just to add some spice, old berlusconi is going to run again. He is not in jail, so why not? As usual, the left-wing media predict, that he does not have a chance, but that has never stopped him before. With more and more people realizing that it is business, not unions, that generate income and pay for the socialist goodies they all have come to expect, and they know the old fox knows business better than the whole rest of their government together. After all, they drink his wine, and his milk, and eat his cheese and his sausages. And they know his Parmelat dairy empire even reaches into North America. Berlusconi might be a bit crooked, which is quite acceptable in Italy, and he might be messing with ladies, that are not fully approved of by the opposition, and that is not really held against him either. At this point, the Catholic church seems to be favoring the socialist Monti, but that might, as usual, backfire. All Berlusconi has to do is grin and say: "Yeah, they are againsta da condoms and againsta da pill too!" It is too early to call that election, except that it is going to be very interesting. Have FUN! DearWebby By the way, Home4Christmas.com is for sale. Somebody could make a nice profit with a domain like that!
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it. --- Tallulah Bankhead
>From Trish: SUBJECT: COMPLETE AND FINISHED No English dictionary has been able to adequately explain the difference between the two words. In a recently held linguistic competition in London, England, attended by the best in the world, Samsundar Balgobin, a Guyanese man from Bachelors Adventure, was the clear winner with a standing ovation lasting over five minutes. Here is his answer. The Question: How do you explain the difference between COMPLETE and FINISHED in a way that is easy to understand? Some people say there is no difference between the two. Samsundar's Answer: "When you marry the right woman, you are COMPLETE. When you marry the wrong woman, you are FINISHED. And when the right one catches you with the wrong one, you are COMPLETELY FINISHED!"
O'Toole worked in the lumber yard for twenty years and all that time he had been stealing the wood and selling it. At last his conscience began to bother him and he went to confession to repent. "Father, it's 15 years since my last confession, and I've been stealing wood from the lumber yard all those years," he told the priest. "I understand my son," says the priest. "Can you make a Novena?" O'Toole said, "Father, if you have the plans, I've got the lumber."
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Click on the picture for the large version Nicaraguan Flowers
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Courtney Reschke, 35, Kuna, Idaho Charged With Abusing Four 15-Year-Old Boys During Sex Romps Reported by The Weekly Vice Courtney Reschke, a 35-year-old Idaho mom has been jailed after she allegedly had sex with four 15-year-old boys. According to the Ada County Sheriff's Office, Reschke had sexual encounters with four 15-year-old boys who she met through her oldest son. At least one of the sexual encounters took place while Reschke's youngest child was in the house. Investigators say the alleged sexual encounters took place during gathering at her home. In many of the instances, Reschke reportedly gave the teens alcohol. During one of the alleged sexual encounters, Reschke's youngest child, aged 5, attempted to get into the room. Reschke allegedly ignored the child and continued with the encounter. Reschke has been booked into the Ada County Jail and charged with two counts of injury to a child and two counts of lewd conduct with a child under 16. -------------- If she can't find any grown-ups, who don't now her yet, then maybe she should move to the next state!
Tech Support Pits From: John 12-Bear Re: How do I change MS Office 2007 default font? Howdy Pard, I have Micro Soft Office 2007 and I would like to change my default print font style. Currently it is Calibri (Body) and I would like to have Arial 12. Oh Almighty Guru I await your direction(s)! I am glad that your eyesight is remaining OK. Your letter is appreciated every day of my life. John 12-Bear Dear John Open a new MS-WEIRD Document Select the HOME tab, then the FONT tab above the writing space. If you mess around with that tab long enough, it will eventually tell you to hit CTRL D to get the FONT Dialog. Yes, I know, that is rather dopey, but since I don't smoke strange stuff, I can't understand either why they do it that way. Hit CTRL D (NOT CTRL F !) Select a font Hit Default in the lower left corner and when it plays stooopid and asks you if deep down inside you really want to make the selected font the default, hit OK. Yes, I know it is dumb, but that is the way they do it at Microsoft Word. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Keeping the Monsters Away with Vanilla Spray When my oldest son was little, he use to be scared to sleep in his room. He thought there were monsters under his bed, or in his closet. So one day I filled a spray bottle up with water and added a little vanilla, about 1 tsp. I wrote on the bottle "monster spray", I also added a picture on it of Cookie Monster with an X drawn over him. So every night we would spray under his bed and in the closet. I would leave the spray on his dresser in case he felt he needed it. It worked wonders! By coville123 Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote, all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.
500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

Paddy was in New York He was patiently waiting, and watching the traffic cop on a busy street crossing. The cop stopped the flow of traffic and shouted, "Okay pedestrians". Then he'd allow the traffic to pass. He'd done this several times, and Paddy still stood on the sidewalk. After the cop had shouted "Pedestrians" for the tenth time, Paddy went over to him and said, "Is it not about time ye let the Catholics across?"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Walking into the bar, Mike said to Charlie the bartender, "Pour me a stiff one - just had another fight with the little woman." "Oh yeah?" said Charlie "And how did this one end?" "When it was over," Mike replied, "she came to me on her hands and knees." "Really," said Charlie, "now that's a switch! What did she say?" She said, "Come out from under the bed, you chicken!"
» Copenhagen Philharmonic


Today in 
1572 Spanish troops begin siege of Haarlem 
1620 103 Mayflower pilgrims land at Plymouth Rock 
1665 "Messiah" Sjabtai Tswi festival in Smyrna
1688 King James II arrested
1719 1st recorded display of Aurora Borealis in US
1792 France's King Louis XVI went on trial, accused of treason
1844 1st dental use of nitrous oxide, Hartford CT 
1872 1st black US Governor took office, Pinchback (Louisiana) 
1888 French Panamá Canal company fails 
1901 Marconi sends 1st transatlantic radio signal, Cornwall to Newfoundland 
1903 British forces under MacDonald & Young march into Tibet 
1905 120º F (49º C), Rivadavia, Argentina (South American record) 
1931 British Statute of Westminster gives complete legislative
   independence to Canada, Australia, New Zealand, 
  South Africa, Ireland, Newfoundland 
1941 Germany & Italy declare war on US
1946 Spain suspended from UN
1961 JFK provides US military helicopters & crews to South Vietnam
1967 SST prototype "Concorde" 1st shown (France) 
1972 Astronauts Cernan & Harrison become 11th & 12th on Moon 
1978 6 masked men bound 10 employees at Lufthansa cargo 
  area at New York Kennedy Airport & made off with $5.8 million  
  in cash & jewelry 
1979 Great Britain grants independence to Zimbabwe (Rhodesia) 
1981 Muhammad Ali's 61st & last fight, losing to Trevor Berbick
1981 Argentine President/General Roberto Viola flees
1985 General Electric acquires RCA Corp & its subsidiary, NBC
1990 13 die in 83 vehicle accident in Chattanooga TN (I-75), 
   due to fog 
1992 Nor'easter storm hits New York, doing $650 million+ 
  worth of damage 
1994 Russian troops pull inside Tsjetsjenië
1997 Federal judge orders Microsoft not to bundle IE4 in Windows 
2012  smiled



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Is the current Adobe update safe? 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Monday, December 10 Walking against the wind seems to be a lot more objectionable these days. In my twenties I used to mush dogs at -30, and not mind the wind or flying ice crystals. I am going to have to figure out a way to extend the hood on my parka to stick futher forward. By the way, Home4Christmas.com is for sale. Somebody could make a nice profit with a domain like that! Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Too many people are thinking of security instead of opportunity. They seem more afraid of life than death. --- James F. Byrnes The generation that criticizes the younger generation is the one that raised it. --- Socratex
As a young married couple, a husband and a wife lived in a cheap housing complex near the military base, where he was working. Their chief complaint was that the walls were paper-thin and that they had no privacy. This was painfully obvious when one morning the husband was upstairs and the wife was downstairs on the telephone. She was interrupted by the doorbell and went to greet her neighbor. "Give this to your husband," he said thrusting a roll of toilet paper into her hands. "He's been yelling for it for 15 minutes!"
An elderly couple was attending church services, about halfway through she leans over and says, " I just had a silent fart. What do you think I should do?" He replies “Put a new battery in your hearing aid."
GuiltFREE! 50 Simple Recipes You Can Use To Whip-up All-natural, Gluten-free, Diabetic-safe, Mouthwatering Desserts. Includes Gingerbread and the Famous Fat Burning Brownies! Enjoy a GuiltFREE! season and ease off any excess weight! Make this one Christmas, where you LOOSE weight for a change, and enjoy the goodies without guilt!

Click on the picture for the large version Flowers in Nicaragua
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Rachel Armstrong, 37, St Louis, Mo Jailed for Stomping Grandmother To Death, Convinced Grandmother Was A Demon Reported by The Weekly Vice Rachel Armstrong, a 37-year-old Missouri woman, has been jailed after she allegedly stomped her 92-year-old grandmother to death because she "thought her grandmother was a demon." According to St. Louis County Police, Armstrong allegedly confessed to throwing her 92-year-old grandmother down a flight of stairs and then repeatedly stomping on her. The victim suffered two broken arms and eight broken ribs as a result of the attack. Armstrong, who works as a nurse, told detectives that she believed her grandmother was a demon and wanted to beat the "devil" out of her before putting her to bed for the night. Armstrong was initially booked into jail and charged with first-degree elder abuse. Those charges will likely be upgraded now that the victim has died of her injuries. The victim, identified as Angela Armstrong, died Monday while she was being treated at a hospital in St. Louis County. Prosecutors are now waiting on the official autopsy from the Coroner's office before presenting new charges to a grand jury.
Tech Support Pits From: Bob F Re: Adobe Update Hi Webby, A while back I read somewhere that we shouldn't download updates to Adobe Flash player as it could cause problems with my computer. I received an update notice from Adobe Flash this week. Is it OK to download? Daily voter, Bob F Dear Bob The current update seems to be OK and is not causing trouble. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Vinyl Tablecloth as Tree Skirt I no longer have to worry about a skirt for my Christmas tree. Last year, I bought a round vinyl tablecloth on clearance after Christmas for $0.79. I found the center of the tablecloth, cut a slit to that point and cut a small circle out of the middle. It works like a charm! If water gets spilled while filling it won't soak in and make a mess, plus the flannel backing keeps the skirt from sliding around. By Karen from NH Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
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500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. Learn How To Cook Low Fat & Low Carb Chinese Food From a Master Chef with 40 Years Of Cooking Experience! With THIS book and it's easy to follow recipes, cook over 500 different healthy meals quickly and economically. Get the 500+ Healthy Chinese Recipes Cookbook. now.

Paddy was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important meeting and couldn't find a parking place. Looking up to heaven he said, "Lord take pity on me. If you find me a parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of me life and give up me Irish Whiskey". Miraculously, a parking place appeared. Paddy looked up again and said, "Never mind, I found one."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Father Murphy walks into a pub in Donegal, and says to the first man he meets, "Do you want to go to heaven?" The man said, "I do Father." The priest said, "Then stand over there against the wall." Then the priest asked the second man, "Do you want to go to heaven?" "Certainly, Father," was the man's reply. "Then stand over there against the wall," said the priest. Then Father Murphy walked up to O'Toole and said, "Do you want to go to heaven? O'Toole said, "No, I don't Father". The priest said, "I don't believe this. You mean to tell me that when you die you don't want to go to heaven?" O'Toole said, "Oh, when I die, yes. I thought you were getting a group together to go right now."
» Copenhagen Philharmonic


Today in 
1520 Martin Luther publicly burned papal edict demands he recant
1582 France begins use of Gregorian calendar 
1690 Massachusetts Bay becomes 1st American colonial 
   government to borrow money 
1799 Metric system established in France (US is a bit 
   behind on that)
1810 Tom Cribb (Great Britain) beats Tom Molineaus 
  (US-Negro) in 1st interracial boxing championship (40 rounds)
1816 Dutch regain Sumatra 
1869 Women suffrage (right to vote) granted in Wyoming 
  Territory (US 1st) 
1898 Spanish-American War ends; US acquires Philippines, 
   Puerto Rico & Guam
1899 1st defeat of "Black Week" - Battle at Stormberg South 
  Africa - Boers vs British army; nearly 3000 British troops killed 
1911 Calbraith Rogers completes 1st crossing of US 
   by airplane (84 days) 
1915 10,000,000th model T Ford assembled 
1936 King Edward VIII abdicates throne to marry 
   Mrs Wallis Simpson 
1941 British battleship Prince of Wales sinks off Singapore 
1941 Japanese troops land on northern Luzon in the Philippines
1941 Japanese troops overrun Guam 
1981 El Salvador army kills 900 
1988 Massive Earthquake in Armenia kills 100,000 in cities 
   of Leninakan & Spitak 
1995 Worst snowstorm in Buffalo history, 37.9" in 24 hours
2012  smiled



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Sorting Favorites 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Sunday, December 9 Today in 1968 Doug Engelbart demonstrated the first computer mouse at Stanford. There were improvements to it in the early and mid 90's. Since then, only the color of the plastic has changed, and the price. Dad told me on Skype that they had prepared the half pipes and jumps and runs for the snow board World Cup competition in the valley next to his, and tht the practising on Friday had gone well. Then over night, it snowed half a Meter. (half a yard). Since punching it down would have slightly altered the half pipes and stuff from the practise conditions, all the new snow had to be shoveled off as quickly as it fell. This year there was no need for artificial snow for that competition. The same for all the ski lifts and cable cars. Apparently they all start their season three weeks earlier than normal, only the hotels are bound to standard schedules, because all their chambermaids and dishwashers and cooks helpers, that come from all over the world to work for peanuts, sleep in crude nooks in an attic, and get a free regional season ticket for the ski lifts and cable cars, are not due to arrive until late in the month. By the way, Home4Christmas.com is for sale. Somebody could make a nice profit with a domain like that! Have FUN! DearWebby
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"If you can imagine it, you can achieve it. If you can dream it, you can become it." --- William Arthur Ward
An Irishman's wife calls the doctor, stating that her husband has taken ill. The doctor asks if she had taken his temperature; she replied that she hadn't but would and then call back. When she hadn't called within a half hour, the doctor called and asked her what had happened. She said, "Well, I didn't have a thermometer, so I put a barometer on his chest and it said dry, so I gave him a pint of beer and he went off to work!"
>From Estelle I was having trouble with the idea of turning 30 and was oversensitive to any signs of advancing age. When I found a prominent gray hair in my bangs, I pointed to my forehead. "Have you seen this?" I indignantly asked my husband. "What?" he asked. "The wrinkles?"
Linux For The Rest Of Us! - Hi-def Video Training Series Now you don't have to be a Genius! Linux is EASIER than Windows 8! You can do more with linux than with Windows 7 or 8! Just like when you switch from gasoline to Diesel, there is a bit of learning to do, but it is easy! Learn Linux From One Of The Most Sought After Instructors. Get ready for when Windows 7 annoys you once too often or when the salespeople tell you, you should switch to Windows 8. Get ready and switch when YOU want to switch! Full Video Training Series, Instantly Accessible, And In Full Hi Def! Linux For The Rest Of Us! Learn at your own pace, whenever you want. Run Linux off a CD, and use Linux whenever you want.

Thanks to Dad for this picture: Click on the picture for the large version Early Christmas Cactus
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Brittany Sonnier, 20, Lake Havasu, AZ Jailed for Having Sex With Family Dogs After Confessing Fetish To Boyfriend Reported by The Weekly Vice Brittany Angelique Sonnier, a 20-year-old Arizona woman has been jailed after she allegedly confessed to having sex with her family's dogs. According to Lake Havasu City Police, an investigation was launched last month after Sonnier told her boyfriend that she was "into having sex with dogs" and had been having sex with her family's dogs since the age of 13. The arrest report further alleges that Sonnier engaged in both vaginal and oral sex with the dogs and "has them trained so that they don't act strange around other people." The boyfriend told police that he was "disturbed and freaked out" after Sonnier showed him images of people having sex with dogs. Sonnier also allegedly told him that she was interested in incest. Following the alleged confession, the boyfriend first tried to talk to Sonnier's father about what his girlfriend shared with him. The father reportedly told him that his daughter had admitted to having sex with dogs in the past, and that he was focused on trying to gain custody of his grandson (Sonnier has a toddler son). The boyfriend also told police that he believes Sonnier is pregnant with his child, but she has refused to take a pregnancy test. Following an investigation into the allegations, Sonnier was originally charged with bestiality. She was later charged instead with two counts of crime against nature.
Tech Support Pits From: Mark Re: Sorting favorites Dear Webby Is there a way to sort favorites alphabetically, after they have been jumbled by deleting some and then lock their old order and put new ones down below? Thanks Mark Dear Mark Yes, there IS an easy way, though Microsoft won't tell you. They tell you to mess with the registry. I found that if you right-click on the topmost grey menu bar and take the checkmark off the STANDARD BUTTONS, then instead of the favorites showing in a long list on the left side, they pull down from the word FAVORITES. Right click anywhere in there, and you will see the option to sort. After sorting, you can put the checkmark back onto STANDARD BUTTONS, and the favorites will remain nicely sorted for a while. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Shower Hooks to Hang Purses Need a better place to store those purses and bags than under the bed disturbing the dust bunnies, how about using shower hooks on your closet rod? They are sturdy and will hold a pretty heavy bag. You can store smaller purses in the larger ones or summer shoes in large mesh bags. Keeps the dust bunnies happy and the dust off your purses. By latrtatr from Loup City, NE Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
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Thanks to Patricia for bringing back this classic: Junior asks his dad, "Daddy, how was I born?" His dad sighs and replies, "Ah, my son, I guess one day you would have to find out anyway! Well, you see your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on MSN. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, but it was too late to hit the delete button. Six weeks later your mom sent me an instant message saying that her operating system was showing signs of unauthorized program activity from a self extracting file which had implanted itself in her BIOS. Then nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared and said: "You've Got Male!"
A motorcycle patrolman was rushed to the hospital with an inflamed appendix. The doctor operated and after the surgery advised him that all was well. However, in the recovery room the patrolman kept feeling something pulling at the hairs on his chest. Worried that it might be a second surgery the doctor hadn't told him about, he finally got enough energy to pull his hospital gown down so he could look at what was making him so uncomfortable. Taped firmly across his hairy chest were three wide strips of adhesive tape, the kind that doesn't come off easily. Written in large black letters was the sentence... "Get well quick...from the nurse you gave a ticket to last week."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
» The Christmas Train


Today in 
0536 Byzantines Libya occupies Rome
1315 Swiss Woudsteden renews Eternal Covenant (Oath Society)
1851 1st YMCA in North America (Montréal) 
1884 Levant Richardson patents ball-bearing skate
1903 Norwegian parliament vote unanimiously for female suffrage
1909 1st US monoplane flown (Henry W Walden, Long Island NY) 
1917 British forces under General Allenby capture Jerusalem 
1931 Japanese army attacks Chinese province of Jehol 
1939 Russian air raid on Helsinki 
1940 Illegal Jewish immigrants to Haifa are deported to Mauritius
1940 British assault on Banghazi Libya 
1941 China declares war on Japan, Germany & Italy 
1953 General Electric announces all Communist employees will be fired 
1958 Robert H W Welch Jr & 11 other men meet in Indianapolis 
   to form the anti-Communist John Birch Society 
1961 SS Colonel Adolf Eichmann found guilty of war crimes in Israel
1968 Doug Engelbart demonstrates first computer mouse at Stanford 
1992 Prince Charles & Princess Diana separation announced 
1994 5 meter meteor 1994 XM1 passes within 100,000 km of Earth
1994 Surgeon General Joycelyn Elders resigns after 
masturbation comments 
2012  smiled



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More DOS Tricks 



Good Morning,  !

Today is Saturday, December 8
Tonight at Sundown Hanukhah begins. Hanukhah is when Jewish people light those 9 candles on fancy candle holders, sing songs, pray, eat jam filled donuts and potato pancakes. Hanukhah lasts 8 days. After that, we will start getting ready for Christmas. Have FUN! DearWebby
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We live in an age when unnecessary things are our only necessities. --- Oscar Wilde Nothing inspires forgiveness quite like revenge. --- Scott Adams Who is more busy than he who hath least to do? --- John Clarke
At an entrance: Women's Libber: "Did you open the door for me because I am a woman?" Man: "Are you? No, I did, because I am a gentleman."
>From Don After a tiring day, a commuter settled down in her seat and closed her eyes. As the train rolled out of the station, the guy sitting next to her pulled out his cell phone and started talking in a loud voice: "Hi sweetheart. It's Eric. I'm on the train" "Yes, I know it's the six thirty and not the four thirty, but I had a long meeting". "No, honey, not with that blonde from the accounts office. It was with the boss". "No sweetheart, you're the only one in my life". "Yes, I'm sure, cross my heart" Fifteen minutes later, he was still talking loudly. When the young woman sitting next to him had enough, she leaned over and said into the phone, "Eric, hang up the phone and come back to bed." Eric doesn't use his cell phone in public any longer.
Linux For The Rest Of Us! - Hi-def Video Training Series Now you don't have to be a Genius! Linux is EASIER than Windows 8! You can do more with linux than with Windows 7 or 8! Just like when you switch from gasoline to Diesel, there is a bit of learning to do, but it is easy! Learn Linux From One Of The Most Sought After Instructors. Get ready for when Windows 7 annoys you once too often or when the salespeople tell you, you should switch to Windows 8. Get ready and switch when YOU want to switch! Full Video Training Series, Instantly Accessible, And In Full Hi Def! Linux For The Rest Of Us! Learn at your own pace, whenever you want. Run Linux off a CD, and use Linux whenever you want.

Click on the picture for the large version
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Lynette Lee, 27, Clarksville, Tennessee Charged With Filing False Rape Charges That She Filed Because She "Didn't Enjoy" Having Sex With Her Date Reported by The Weekly Vice Lynette Lee, a 27-year-old Clarksville was charged with filing a false rape report after she allegedly admitted to making up the rape allegation because she "didn't enjoy" having sex with her date. According to Clarksville police, an investigation was opened on November 23 after Lee told detectives that she had been raped during a date with a man she met on the online dating site meetme.com. When officers interviewed the suspect, he told them that he went on a date with Lee before retiring to a local motel for consensual sex. When detectives conducted a second interview with Lee a few days later, she initially confirmed her initial story, but later admitted to making the story up. She went on to say that she made up the rape allegation because "she did not enjoy" the sex and that "it was bad," according to the arrest affidavit. Lee was booked into jail and charged with filing a false report. Her bond has been set at $2,000.
Tech Support Pits From: Svend Re: Additional DOS tricks Last time we saw that dir *.PPS lists all your PPS files in that folder, and nothing else. Let's assume you want to see a list of just the folders, not of files. Type dir *. Unless somebody really messed up and made a folder with an extension, that command will show just folders, plus maybe the odd file, that got saved without an extension. If you see a file without an extension, rename it to have a .txt extension. That makes it safe. It won't be executed or opened by some program, that can't handle it. A Text editor might show garbage, but if you see the words GIF or JPG in the gobledigook, then it was a picture saved without an extension, and you can rename it to have that extension. That makes it usable again. If not, dump it. You can't open it anyway. To rename a file, type ren oldname.ext newname.ext or in the case of a missing extension. ren oldname newname.ext Just don't rename folders that way! It works, but will cause confusion. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Give Child A Christmas Ornament Every Year When our kids were little, we bought or made two ornaments with dates each year for the tree for each child. When the oldest got married and left home, we were able to give him a box with all the ornaments from his first Christmas through the most recent. This gives your children a nice start on ornaments for their own tree with a sentimental value. The reason for two ornaments was so we could keep one and always have the memories as we decorated our tree when the kids leave home. We have started the same custom for our grand-babies. By Myst from Muncie, IN Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
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Little Johnny was left to fix lunch. When his mother returned with a friend, she noticed that Johnny had already strained the tea. The two women then sipped their tea happily while having lunch. "Was it hard finding the tea strainer in the kitchen?" Johnny's mother asked. "I couldn't find it Ma, so I used the fly swatter," he replied. His mother nearly fainted, so Johnny hastily added: "Don't worry, Ma, I used the old one. But it looks like new now!
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
» Creative Stacks


Today in 
1777 Captain Cook leaves Society Islands 
1854 Pope Pius IX proclaims Immaculate Conception, 
   makes Mary free of Original Sin 
1863 Abraham Lincoln announces plan for 
   Reconstruction of South 
1863 Jesuit Church of La Compana in Santiago Chile 
    catches fire, 2,500 die in panic 
1881 Vienna's Ring Theater destroyed by fire, 
   kills between 640-850
1923 German-US friendship treaty signed
1923 Salary & price freeze in Germany
1931 Coaxial cable patented 
1941 US & Britain declare war on Japan, US enters WWII 
1948 Jordan annexs Arabic Palestine
1949 Chinese Nationalist government moves from 
   Chinese mainland to Formosa (Taiwan)
1952 French troops shoot on demonstrators at 
   Casablanca, 50 die
1974 Greek monarchy rejected by referendum
1981 France performs nuclear test 
1982 Demanding an end to nuclear weapons, Norman Mayer,
   holds the Washington Monument hostage - After 10 hours, 
   police kill him; he has no explosives
1987 Occupied Palestinians start "intefadeh" (uprising) 
   against Israel 
1987 President Reagan & Soviet General Secretary Gorbachev
   sign a treaty eliminating medium range nuclear missiles 
1989 Great Britain performs nuclear test 
1991 Russia, Byelorussia & Ukraine form Commonwealth of
    Independent States 
2012  smiled



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More DOS tricks 



Good Morning,  !
Today is Wednesday, December 5
Today I have to go for more injections into my eyeballs.
That means no newsletters on Thursday and Friday.
Hopefully I will be back on Saturday, but no guarantee.

I was quite surprised about the enthusisastic response about 
the History Summary. OK, I'll continue doing it.

One subscriber asked if I was Jewish, and if that was the 
reason there were so many events involving Jews.

No, I am not Jewish.
The reason I mention the worst of the atrocities against 
Jews is because there were so many of them. When 500 
people got killed in a war, and on the same date in some 
other country 1500 Jews got burned to death,  then I believe 
I have to mention those, not the "little" war. 

Narrowing down 250 or more events to 20 - 25 is not so easy.
Jews DO feature very prominently in history, usually as victims.
There are no or very few reasons recorded as to WHY people 
were chasing them away and/or killing them, and why that 
did not stop with the Old Testament. Somebody else can
speculate about that, I just summarize what happened and
reduce the huge number of events to a nice, tidy, little panel.  

Have FUN!
DearWebby


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The word 'meaningful' when used today is nearly always meaningless. --- Paul Johnson If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door. --- Paul Beatty
A group of Kentucky friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos for the day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering under the weight of an eight-point buck. "Where's Henry?" the others asked. "Henry had a stroke of some kind. He's a couple of miles back up the trail," the successful hunter replied. "You left Henry laying out there and carried the deer back?" they inquired. "A tough call," nodded the hunter. "But I figured no one is going to steal Henry!"
A senior at Kentucky was overheard saying... "When the end of the world comes, I hope to be in Kentucky." When asked why, he replied he'd rather be in Kentucky because everything happens in Kentucky 20 years later than in the civilized world.
Gluten Free Low Glycemic Cookbook for Diabetics, Allergy Sufferers and all food sensitive people. This Cookbook is gluten-free, low-glycemic, allergy-aware with meat, vegetarian and vegan options throughout. There isn't another product like it on or offline! Yes, it's unique! Have Fun Making Yummy, Gourmet Tasting, Gluten-Free, Low-Glycemic Meals the Quick and Easy Way. Delicious Desserts Too! Get Fun with GF/LG Food now!

Click on the picture for the large version Singapore
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Hannah Sabata, 19, Stromsburg, Nebraska Bank robber and car thief uploads confession to YouTube, and promptly gets arrested. Reported by Walter, the Stonecarver http://youtu.be/lAZoo5KRMZ4 WACO, Neb. - A 19-year-old Nebraska woman robbed a bank and was then seen in a video posted on YouTube bragging about the crime. York County Sheriff Dale Radcliff said a copy of the video will be turned in as evidence against Hannah Sabata of Stromsburg, who was arrested last week. Sabata faces robbery and theft charges in connection with the robbery of the Cornerstone Bank branch in Waco, Neb., on Tuesday, Nov. 27. Police say on the same day a stolen car used in the robber's getaway was at Buckley Park in Stromsburg. The video, uploaded by YouTube user Jellee Beanie, and titled "Chick Bank robber," was posted on Wednesday, Nov. 28. Sabata was arrested shortly afterward. It shows a woman holding handwritten signs that say she robbed a bank and stole a car. The woman then holds a large bundle of cash in front of the camera. On the signs, she writes that she stole $6,256. Sabata also gives her reasons for the robbery, writing the "whole system is a game." She writes that the government took her baby and charged her with neglect. (Typical if the baby has heroin, cocaine or crack in the blood) Sabata is scheduled for a preliminary hearing on Dec. 26.
Tech Support Pits From: Svend Re: More DOS tricks DOS really shows it's power, when you use Wildcards. A ? is good for one letter. A * is good for anything on that side of a period. If you, for example, have a lot of .pps and .ppt files, and want to list all of them, type dir *.pp? The * is good for anything to the left of the period, the ? is good for whatever letter there might be after the pp. Naturally, you have to first change the directory to where those files are. The where command will show you That one is a bit tricky. It is more or less a copy of the UNIX / Linux "locate" command, but needs the drive letter and a space. For example, type where /R c:\ *.pp? The /R makes it look recursively down in all directories. Yes, definitely go to c:\, the REAL root directory, not the dopey misdirected desktop, that tries to lure you away from the root. When you run that command, just like I got it there, DOS will produce a list of all the PPT and PPS files, that you got. Lots of them, right? And also some mysterious PPD files. Those are drivers. We don't wan to mess with those. If you are not at the root, C:\ type cd \ that will get you there. Now make a directory called PPS: md PPS Simple and easy! type dir PPS 2 files already in there??? One of them is two dots, the other is one. Well, that is UNIX legacy. Two dots are the link to one level up, one dot is the link to the directory, where you are. Change your location into that directory: cd PPS The prompt tells you where you are. Type dir it shows you the same as when you typed dir PPS while you were one level up. OK, now assuming you were 7 levels deep in the insanity called Documents and Settings, it would be very tedious to type the full path to change one level up. So instead, you simply type cd .. and go one level up. That is what those two dots are for. OK, enough for today. Next time I'll show you how to gather all those PPS files and move them to that PPS folder. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Fresh out of business school, the young man answered a want ad for an accountant. He was being interviewed by a very nervous man who ran a three-man business. "I need someone with an accounting degree," the man said. "But mainly, I'm looking for someone to do my worrying for me." "Excuse me?" the young accountant said. "I worry about a lot of things," the man said. "But I don't want to have to worry about money. Your job will be to take all the money worries off my back." "I see," the young accountant said. "And how much does the job pay?" "I will start you at eighty-five thousand dollars." "Eighty-five thousand dollars!" the young man exclaimed. "How can such a small business afford a sum like that?" "That," the owner said, "is your first worry."
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Wrap Presents in Reusable Totes I've been collecting inexpensive cloth tote bags for gifts. I buy these tote bags at grocery stores and thrift shops. They cost $1 or $2. I put Christmas gifts (and birthday gifts) inside the reusable tote, instead of a gift bag or wrapping paper. I'm saving money, recycling, and the recipient gets a handy cloth or recycled tote bag. I've picked up some really nifty tote bags over the summer. By RuralAngel from Dover, DE Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
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NEWS FLASH! - Nebraska's worst air disaster occurred! when a small two-seater Cessna 150 plane, piloted by two University of Nebraska students, crashed into a cemetery earlier today. Search and Rescue workers have recovered 300 bodies so far and expect the number to climb as digging continues into the evening. The pilot and copilot survived and are helping in the recovery efforts.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
"Dad," said Little Johnny, "I'm late for football practice. Would you please do my homework for me?" The father said irately, "Son, it just wouldn't be right." "That's okay," replied Little Johnny, "but you could at least give it a try, couldn't you?"
» Shadowland


Today in 
1349 500 Jews are massacred at Nüremberg in Black death riots
1456 Earthquake strikes Naples; about 35,000 die 
1492 Columbus discovers Hispaniola (El Espanola/Haiti) 
1496 Jews are expelled from Portugal by order of King Manuel I 
1766 London auctioneers Christie's hold their 1st sale
1837 Uprising under William Lyon Mackenzie in Canada
1846 C F Schoenbein obtains patent for cellulose nitrate explosive
1848 President Polk triggers Gold Rush of '49, confirms 
   California gold discovery
1854 Aaron Allen of Boston patents folding theater chair 
1861 Gatling gun patented
1876 Daniel Stillson (Massachusetts) patents 1st practical 
   pipe wrench
1876 Fire at Brooklyn Theater kills 295, trampled or 
   burned to death 
1879 1st automatic telephone switching system patented
1893 1st electric car (built in Toronto) could go 15 miles 
   between charges
1932 German physicist Albert Einstein granted a US visa
1935 1st commercial hydroponics operation established 
   (Montebello CA) 
1936 Armenian SSR, Azerbaijan SSR, Georgian SSR, 
Kazakhstan SSR & Kirghiz SSR becomes constituent 
republics of the Soviet Union 
1952 London smog of 1952 - worst smog in London ever, 
   4,000+ die
1974 Airport terminal roof collapses killing 17 (Teheran) 
1977 Egypt breaks diplomatic relations with Syria, Libya, 
Algeria, Iraq & South Yemen 
1985 Great Britain performs nuclear test 
1989 France TGV train reaches world record speed of 482.4 kph
1993 Astronauts begin repair of Hubble telescope in space 
2012  smiled



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Some DOS Tricks 



Good Morning,  !
Today is Tuesday, December 4
Tomorrow I have to go for more injections into my eyeballs.
That means no newsletters on Thursday and Friday.
Hopefully I will be back on Saturday, but no guarantee.

Have FUN!
DearWebby


If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

The big thieves hang the little ones. --- Czech Proverb
A young woman was worried about her stress-related habit of biting her fingernails down to the quick, so her friend advised her to take up yoga. She did, and soon her finger- nails were growing normally. Her friend asked her if yoga had totally cured her nervous- ness. "No," she replied, "but now I can reach my toe-nails so I bite them instead."
>From UncWes The Food Stamp Program, administered by the U.S. Department of Agriculture, is proud to be distributing the greatest amount of free meals and food stamps ever to 96 million people!! Meanwhile, the National Park Service, administered by the U.S. Department of the Interior, asks us to "Please Do Not Feed the Animals." Their stated reason for the policy is 'because the animals would grow dependent on handouts, and would not learn to take care of themselves.' This ends today's lesson
Gluten Free Low Glycemic Cookbook for Diabetics, Allergy Sufferers and all food sensitive people. This Cookbook is gluten-free, low-glycemic, allergy-aware with meat, vegetarian and vegan options throughout. There isn't another product like it on or offline! Yes, it's unique! Have Fun Making Yummy, Gourmet Tasting, Gluten-Free, Low-Glycemic Meals the Quick and Easy Way. Delicious Desserts Too! Get Fun with GF/LG Food now!

Thanks to Lillemor for sending this pictrue: Click on the picture for the large version Lights over Stockholm
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Janet brown, 32, in Reed City, Michigan Teacher - Charged With Having Sex With 16-Year-Old Student Reported by The Weekly Vice Janet Brown, a 32-year-old teacher at Mecosta-Osceola Intermediate School District, was jailed Monday after she allegedly had sex with a 16-year-old student. According to Michigan State Police, Brown was teaching at a school located at the Eagle Village Youth Detention Center when the alleged sexual relationship took place. An investigation was launched earlier this month when police discovered intimate text messages on a mobile phone. The student reportedly attends the same school, which specializes in educating troubled teens. Investigators say the alleged sexual contact took place on the school campus. Brown was booked into the Osceola County Jail and charged with three felony counts of criminal sexual conduct. She was released after posting a $5,000 cash bond. I can't blame the kid for falling for a good looking teacher like her, but she should have been smart enough not to leave text evidence on a phone in a detention center. DUH! That is as boneheaded as Petraeus!
Tech Support Pits From: Svend Re: Some DOS tricks Dear Webby, .........So, I would sure like to see a short users manual of DOS with the most common commands - including the proper spaces, properly typed commands, etc. Thank you in advance. Keep up the good work, Webby, Svend Dear Svend To get to DOS, even in Windows 7, click on START and in the search window at the bottom, type cmd and hit Enter. That gets you to the Command line. The other method is to highlight a folder in the File Explorer, hold down SHIFT and Right-click it. That gives you the option to select "Open Command Line Here". OK, so you got the command line open, a scary balck screen with a bit of light gray text. Let's make that a bit friendlier. Type color 9e and hit Enter. You can of course use other combinations. The numbers 0 to 9 are for background, the letters A to F are for the text. If you accidentally choose the same colors for background and text and can't read anything, type color and hit Enter. Gray on black is restored. To see what each number and letter stands for, type color /? and hit Enter. All DOS commands have built in explanations now. Originally DOS came with huge, heavy books, page size, and two inches thick. Now you just type a command, a space and /? DOS is just UNIX translated for PC use, and PC users, not something invented by Bill Gates, even though many people try to blame him for it. Gates and his buddies paid some guy in Seattle to port it from RISK processor use to CISC processor use, and to make the commands more like English language. That was the original Microsoft DOS. For example, the UNIX "cp" command is called "copy" in DOS, the UNIX "mv" command is called "move" in DOS. If you don't know UNIX, think about what you would name a command to do what you want done, type that word and add a space and /? and hit Enter. Chances are pretty good, that you will get an explanation for how to use it. OK, enough for today Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Father Murphy was playing golf with a parishioner. On the first hole, he sliced into the rough. His opponent heard him mutter, "Hoover!" under his breath. On the second hole, the ball went straight into a water hazard. "Hoover!" again, a little louder this time. On the third hole, a miracle occured & Fr. Murphy's drive landed on the green only six inches from the hole! "Praise be to God!" He carefully lined up the putt, but the ball curved around the hole instead of going in. "HOOVER!" By this time, his opponent couldn't withhold his curiosity any longer, and asked why the priest said "Hoover". "It's the biggest dam I know." he replied.
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Keep a Button Jar Remember Grandma's Jar of Buttons? You can easily start your own. New garments often have an extra button! The button is often in a tiny plastic bag attached somewhere to the garment. Instead of discarding the extra button, place it in a jar with a lid, and start your own button jar. It can be handy to have an extra button. By Barb in TN Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
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>From Fred I am a victim of the latest scam which is happening in shopping mall parking lots. Two good looking young women come to your car as you are parking. One starts wiping your windshield with a rag and the other comes to your window and bends over so far her breasts just about fall out of her blouse. While you're distracted, the other one lets herself in the backseat and then they both start begging you for a ride home. Be very wary, because as soon as you start driving, one of them will take off her shirt and rub her breasts on you while the other climbs over the seat and unzips your pants. This is when they steal your wallet. I was robbed last Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday, but I couldn't find them on Saturday or Sunday. PS. The Dollar Store has some very nice wallets for, guess what? A Dollar. They even come with brocures and fake money stuffed into them, to make them look nicely filled.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
>From Karen Everybody's a comedian. I called my local home improvement store for a simple piece of advice. "I know the Sheetrock is nailed to the studs," I said to the guy who answered the phone, "but how do I find the studs?" "Put an ad in the personals column." he suggested.
» Shadowland


Today in 
0771 Karel, the Great, becomes king of all France
1110 Syria harbor city Saida (Sidon) surrenders to Crusaders 
1489 Battle of Baza-Spanish army captures Baza from the Moors
1534 Turkish sultan Suleiman occupies Baghdad 
1655 Middelburg Netherlands forbids building of synagogue
1680 Hen in Rome lays an egg imprinted with comet not seen 
   until Dec 16th
1691 Emperor Leopold I takes control of Transsylvania
1832 French army begins bombing citadel of Antwerp
1843 Manila paper (made from sails, canvas & rope) patented
1915 Ku Klux Klan receives charter from Fulton County GA
1923 Cecil B DeMille's 1st version of "Ten Commandments"
1935 1,200 at St Joseph's College (Philadelphia) enroll in 
   anticommunism class 
1952 Killer fogs begin in London England, "Smog" becomes a word
1976 Liz Taylor's 7th marriage (John Warner) 
1983 US jet fighters strike Syrian anti-aircraft positions in Lebanon
1996 NASA's 1st Mars rover launched from Cape Canaveral 
2012 Nobody read today's history summary, but they are too polite
   and/or lazy to tell me, I am wasting my time.
2012  smiled



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What to do whn movies don't play smoothly 



Good Morning,  !
Today is Monday, December 3

Thick fog and light snow. Looks real Christmassy outside.

In Europe they have enough early snow, so that ski season
will be starting early in most areas. The big fancy resorts
have to wait, becuase the hordes of chambermaids and 
dishwashers, that come from all over Europe, Australia and
New Zealand, have been contracted way in advance to start 
at the traditional dates. 

The locals, who don't need the still closed hotels, are of 
course having a ball. One resort bragged about having 
stockpiled 50,000 cubic meters of artificial snow already,
thanks to the early cold temperatures. They don't blow
the artificial snow onto the runs any more, nowadays they
just make huge pyramids and then truck the snow  to
where it is needed because of wear. 

With the snow makers not blowing onto the runs and no big
crowds of skiers, the locals really get to enjoy some cold but 
excellent pre-season skiing.

Have FUN!
DearWebby


If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Just because something doesn't do what you planned it to do doesn't mean it's useless. --- Thomas A. Edison
The husband reluctantly agreed to play in the couples alternate shot tournament at his club. He teed off on the first hole, a par four, and blistered a drive 300 yards down the middle of the fairway. Upon reaching the ball, the husband said to his wife, "Just hit it toward the green, anywhere around there will be fine." The wife proceeded to shank the ball deep into the woods. Undaunted, the husband said "that's ok sweetheart" and spent the full five minutes looking for the ball. he found it just in time, but in a horrible position. he played the shot of his life to get the ball within two feet of the hole. He told his wife to knock the ball in. his wife then pro- ceeded to knock the ball off the green and into a bunker. still maintaining composure, the husband summoned all of his skill and holed the shot from the bunker. he took the ball out of the hole and, while walking off the green, put his arm around his wife and calmly said, "Honey, that was a bogey, and that's ok, but I think we can do better on the next hole." To which she replied, "Listen dear, don't yell at me, only 2 of those 5 shots were mine!"
Thanks to Dave for this story: My job is in the aerospace industry, and it's always been a challenge to explain what kind of work I do. At one gathering, I tried several unsuccessful attempted explanations before deciding to be as generic as possible. When the subject came up while I was talking with a group of guys, I replied simply, "Defense contractor." The men nodded, and as the conversation went on, I silently declared victory to myself. Then, one of them turned to me and asked, "So, what do you put up mainly? Chain-link?"
Gluten Free Low Glycemic Cookbook for Diabetics, Allergy Sufferers and all food sensitive people. This Cookbook is gluten-free, low-glycemic, allergy-aware with meat, vegetarian and vegan options throughout. There isn't another product like it on or offline! Yes, it's unique! Have Fun Making Yummy, Gourmet Tasting, Gluten-Free, Low-Glycemic Meals the Quick and Easy Way. Delicious Desserts Too! Get Fun with GF/LG Food now!

Click on the picture for the large version
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Raquel Gonzalez, 24, Bradenton, FL Jailed for Assaulting Boyfriend Over Bad Sex Reported by The Weekly Vice Raquel Gonzalez, a 24-year-old Florida woman, was jailed Monday after she allegedly assaulted her boyfriend because she wasn't happy with the way he performed in bed. According to the Manatee County Sheriff's Office, Gonzalez attacked her boyfriend after having sexual intercourse with him because he climaxed and she didn't. The victim, 30-year-old Esric Davis, lives together with Gonzalez in the same home. "lives" ? or "lived" ? Investigators say Gonzalez became enraged following the encounter and "began hitting and scratching (Davis)." Davis reportedly sustained numerous scratches to his face during the assault, according to the arrest affidavit. Gonzalez reportedly told deputies that she also received scratches when Davis attempted to restrain her. Davis told deputies that Gonzalez "goes off" on him frequently and has been physically violent towards him in the past. After deputies read Gonzalez her Miranda rights, she allegedly became uncooperative and refused to answer any further questions. She was booked into the Manatee County Jail and charged with felony domestic battery. Her bond has been set at $750.
Tech Support Pits From: Randall Re: Movies don't play smoothly Dear Webby, Whenever i try to play a video from a website that i am on the video lags a lot or jumps around where its not viewable at all. Any guidance on this problem would be appreciated. Hope you have a wonderful day Webby... Randall Dear Randall That sounds like a slow Internet connection. Either the site, or your connection, or both are slow. Pause the video. The faint loading bar will continue to slowly advance, even if the playing bar is stopped. Wait until the loading bar is almost completed, and then resume playing. It will play as smoothly as if you had a 20 Mbps connection. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Mike's parents have four children. Their names are Penny, Dime and Quarter. What is the fourth child's name? (Answer at the end)
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Soap For Leg Cramp Relief This may sound crazy but it actually works. My sister told me she had bad leg cramps that prevented a restful night's sleep. She put a bar of soap, any soap, under the top sheet. That's right, a bar of soap! For whatever reason, it works. I really couldn't believe it until I tried it myself. You have to do it to believe it but it works! Just sharing for anyone else that has leg cramps. By Irene Miller Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
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After much urging by his wife, my Uncle Joe applied for work on a farm. The foreman decided to give him a try and handed Joe a stool and a bucket and told him to milk a cow. An hour later Uncle Joe returned dirty and sweaty, the bucket in one hand and the broken stool in the other. "Extracting the milk was easy," he explained. "The worst part was getting the cow to sit on the stool."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
When my sister Andrea got married, she asked to wear my mother's wedding dress. The day she tried it on for the first time I was sitting with Mother in the living room as Andrea descended the stairs. The gown was a perfect fit on her petite frame. Mother's eyes welled with tears. I put my arm around her. "You're not losing a daughter," I reminded her in time-honored fashion. "You're gaining a son." "Oh, forget about that bullshit!" she said with a sob. "I used to fit into that dress!"
» Castles of France


Today in 
1586 Sir Thomas Herriot introduces potatoes to England, 
   from Colombia 
1621 Galileo perfects the telescope
1639 1st marriage annulment by court decree passes
1685 Charles II bars Jews from settling in Stockholm Sweden
1775 1st official US flag raising (aboard naval vessel Alfred) 
1910 Neon lights, 1st publically seen (Paris Auto Show) 
1930 Air-borne chemicals combine with fog to kill 60 (Meuse 
   Valley Belgium) 
1931 Alka Seltzer goes on sale 
1944 British order to disarm, causes general strike in Greece 
1948 Chinese refugee ship "Kiangya" explodes in 
   E China Sea, killing 1,100 
1964 Police arrests 800 sit-in students at University of 
   California at Berkeley 
1964 "Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer" 1st airs on TV
1967 1st human heart transplant performed (Dr Barnard, 
  South Africa) 
1971 President Nixon commutes Jimmy Hoffa's jail term 
1982 77ºF highest temperature ever recorded in 
   Cleveland in December 
1984 2,000 die from Union Carbide poison gas emission 
   in Bhopal, India
1997 Golden State Warrior guard Latrell Sprewell, four-year, 
   $32 million, contract terminated for attacking his coach 
   P J Carlesimo 
2012  smiled


The answer is
Mike



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Is "moving" files safe with Windows 7? 




Good Morning,  !
Today is Sunday, December 2

>From Millie
Dear Webby,
I missed a previous issue and found it in your Humor Letter Blog.
It has a beautiful video from Dianne by The Rocky Mountain 
Elk Foundation by Scott McKinley.   This is a beautiful video with 
the background music playing "Somewhere Over The Rainbow."  
This is a keeper for me.
 
I've received Dear Webby's Humor Letter for years now.  
It truly is the Best Newsletter  on the Internet.  Thank you for 
your excellent work!
 
Sincerely,
Millie


Have FUN!
DearWebby


If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Discretion is not the better part of biography. --- Lytton Strachey Never confuse movement with action. --- Ernest Hemingway
>From Lisa My kindergarten-aged daughter suddenly announced just before school that she needed to take a clean tee shirt to class. She told us the teacher was going to iron an anti-drug message on it. My wife frantically swept through my daughter's room, finding nothing usable but one tee shirt that already had something printed on one side. She sent it off to school with my daughter. That afternoon, my daughter returned and happily showed off her shirt. On one side it said, "Families are Forever." And on the other, "Be Smart, Don't Start."
A husband and wife were involved in a petty argument, both of them unwilling to admit they might be in error. "I'll admit I'm wrong," the wife told her husband in a con- ciliatory attempt, "if you'll admit I'm right." He agreed and, like a gentleman, insisted she go first. "I'm wrong," she said. With a twinkle in his eye, he responded, "You're right!"
Gluten Free Low Glycemic Cookbook for Diabetics, Allergy Sufferers and all food sensitive people. This Cookbook is gluten-free, low-glycemic, allergy-aware with meat, vegetarian and vegan options throughout. There isn't another product like it on or offline! Yes, it's unique! Have Fun Making Yummy, Gourmet Tasting, Gluten-Free, Low-Glycemic Meals the Quick and Easy Way. Delicious Desserts Too! Get Fun with GF/LG Food now!

Click on the picture for the large version
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Arica Broadus, 18, in Harrisburg, PA Jailed After Tearing Medical Device Out Of Her Boyfriend's Chest Because She Thought He Was Going To Cheat On Her Reported by The Weekly Vice Arica Broadus, an 18-year-old Pennsylvania bonehead was jailed Sunday after she tried to tear a medical device out of her boyfriend's chest because she thought he was going to cheat on her. According to police, Broadus became suspicious of her 28-year-old boyfriend Sunday afternoon when he informed her that he was going to the store. Broadus accused her boyfriend of "going to see girls" and proceeded to follow him to the store. She then attacked the victim near the intersection of Derry and Mulberry streets after threatening to kill him. Investigators say Broadus grabbed a catheter that had been surgically placed in the victim's chest for medical reasons, and attempted to pull it out. When police arrived, the victim's catheter had been partially torn from his chest. He was taken to a local hospital for treatment. Broadus was taken into custody a short time later. Broadus was booked into jail and charged with attempted homicide, aggravated assault, recklessly endangering another person and making terroristic threats.
Tech Support Pits From: Frank Re: Losing Folders in Windows 7 Dear Webby, Windows 7 has beent losing folders, and also losing content, when trying to move files to differentr drives. Is that just me, or is that common with Windows 7? Franks Dear Frank It is not just you. Windows 7 file handling is very fragile. Don't let folders get too big, and most definitely don't try to move too many files at one time, if you use the File Explorer to do that. Chances are very high, that in the move Windows 7 will drop the files somewhere between the cracks, and you will never find them again. Move them in small batches, so that even if they get lost in the move, you did not lose all of them, just that one batch. Also, avoid the SHIFT-DRAG "move". Use CTRL-drag "copy", and if they have arrived safely, then go and delete them at the old place. Anything else is asking for trouble with Windows 7. It may work fine for a year at a time, then all of a sudden, the contents of a move are gone. For the most secure way of moving them, use DOS. That has never messed up on me, and using wildcards to selectively move files is a snap with DOS. Have FUN! DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Woman 1: Did you get a new haircut? Woman 2: Yes, I did. Thanks for noticing. W1: Oh! That's so cute! W2: Do you think so? I wasn't sure after my hairdresser gave me the mirror. I mean, you don't think it's too fluffy looking? W1: Oh no! No, it's perfect. I'd love to get my hair cut like that, but I think my face is too wide. I'm pretty much stuck with this stuff I think. W2: Are you serious? I think your face is adorable. And you could easily get one of those layer cuts - that would look so cute I think. I was actually going to do that except that I was afraid it would accent my long neck. W1: Oh, that's funny! I would love to have your neck! W2: Are you kidding? I know girls that would love to have your shoulders. Everything drapes so well on you. I mean, look at my arms, see how short they are? If I had your shoulders I could get clothes to fit me so much easier. MEANWHILE.... Man 1: Got your ears lowered? Man 2: Yeah.
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Razor For Removing Fabric Pills It seems like it's always your old favorites that get those awful little fabric pills. Here's a tip that will help your favorite sweater go from worn out to like new again! Take a new disposable razor and lightly go across the garment. Use short strokes while pulling the fabric tight. Don't press too hard and be careful when going near the seams. Stop frequently to blow the pills out of the razor. Your clothes will be looking like new again in no time! By Shawna G. Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote all in one place, without having to go there separately for each.

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"How did the wedding go?" asked the preacher's wife. "Just fine until I asked the bride if she would obey, etc., and she said, 'Do you think I'm nuts?' and the groom said, 'I do,' and then things began to happen really quickly."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
“I’ve never flown before, said the nervous old lady to the pilot. “You will bring me down safely, won’t you? “All I can say ma’am,” said the pilot, “is that I’ve never left anyone up there yet!”
» Grimmace 25 Pack


Today in 
1804 Napoleon Bonaparte crowned 1st Emperor of France in 
  Paris by Pope Pius VII
1805 Napoleon defeats Russians & Austrians at Austerlitz 
1823 President James Monroe declares his "Monroe Doctrine" 
1848 Franz Josef I becomes emperor of Austria and King of Hungary
1852 2nd French empire established; Louis Napoleon is emperor 
1899 US & Germany agree to divide Samoa between them 
1901 King Camp Gillette begins selling safety razor blades 
1914 Austrian army occupies Belgrade Serbia
1924 British-German trade agreement signed
1927 1st Model A Fords sold, for $385 
1941 Naval Intelligence ceases bugging Japanese consul 
1941 Yamamoto sends his fleet to Pearl Harbor 
1942 1st controlled nuclear chain reaction 
   (Enrico Fermi-University of Chicago) 
1956 Fidel Castro lands with "Granma" on coast of Cuba 
1957 1st US full-scale atomic electric power plant, Shippingport PA
1961 Fidel Castro declares he's a Marxist, & will lead Cuba 
   to Communism 
1963 1st Dutch rocket launched/reaches height of 10 km 
1969 Boeing 747 jumbo jet (Seattle WA to New York NY) 
1971 Soviet Mars 3 is 1st to soft land on Mars 
1978 Anti-Shah protesters poured through Tehran 
1979 Crowds attack US embassy at Tripoli Libya
1994 Jury finds Heidi Fleiss guilty of running a call girl ring
1997 MCI Center opens in Washington DC
2012  smiled


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Flash for digital cameras 



Good Morning,  !
Today is Saturday, December 1

News about Syria seems to be clearly divided into rebel
sponsored and Government sponsored. The Enemy Times
is of course clearly on the side of Asad. 

An example is their totally false claims, that the Syrian 
Government can get information about rebels, who use
Skype. Totally false! For one thing, Skype is securely
encrypted, and for another thing, since long before the 
Syrian Govt has blocked and shut down the Internet, 
the rebels have been using dial-up satellite phones and
totally bypassed the Government controlled internet.
Near Turkey and Lebanon they use wireless ISPs from
across the border. The Syrian Government is not even 
in the path, and has absolutely no chance of even 
detecting who uses Skype. 

It is difficult to say at this point whether the scare-mongering 
by The Enemy Times is due to their leftists slant, or due to
them being without a clue.

Could be a mixture of both.

Have FUN!
DearWebby


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My greatest fear is there is no such thing as PMS and this really is my wife's personality. --- W.J.Clinton Happiness doesn't come from doing what we like to do But from liking what we have to do. --- Wilferd A. Peterson
There is a new study out about women and how they feel about their asses. I thought the results were pretty interesting: 85% of women think their ass is too fat... 10% of women think their ass is too skinny... The other 5% sayd they don't care, they love him, he's a good provider, and they would have married him anyway.
A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load of seniors down a highway when he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady. She offers him a handful of peanuts, which he gratefully munches up. After about 15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another handful of peanuts. She repeats this gesture about five more times. When she is about to hand him another batch again he asks the little old lady, "Why they don't you eat the peanuts yourself?". "We can't chew them because we've no teeth", she replied. The puzzled driver asks, "Why do you buy them then?" The old lady replied, "We just love the chocolate around them."
Number 1 Site For Background Checks: 360 The secret of professionals, now available to YOU! Check out anybody you want with 360!

Click on the picture for the large version Zimba! I used to climb that mountain as a teenager. It is close to where I grew up, and was a constant challenge.
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Jillian Leigh Martone, 35, in Delray beach, Florida Charged With Assaulting Man Because He Wasn't Ready To Be Her Boyfriend After First Date Reported by The Weekly Vice Jillian Leigh Martone, a 35-year-old Delray Beach woman was jailed Wednesday after she allegedly punched a man in the face, threatened him with a knife and smashed his window because he wasn't ready to be her boyfriend after their first date. According to Boca Raton police, officers were dispatched to the victim's apartment after receiving a domestic disturbance report. Arriving officers found Martone crying outside the victim's apartment. She was reportedly sitting next to a cluster of large rocks which were used to smash the victim's window. The victim, identified as 39-year-old Efren Molina, told police that he met Martone for the first time last week and the two agreed to go out on a date together. Molina stated that he picked Martone up at her apartment, went out for dinner and drinks and then returned to his apartment. At some point in the evening, Martone reportedly referred to herself as Molina's girlfriend. When Molina told Martone that he didn't necessarily agree with that title, Martone allegedly became enraged. In retaliation, Martone allegedly punched Molina in the face, ran to the kitchen to grab a knife and attempted to stab him with it. When Molina shouted for help, his roommate entered the living room and wrestled the knife away from Martone. Molina and the roommate then ejected Martone from the apartment. That's when Martone allegedly grabbed a large rock and smashed the victim's window. When officers arrived, Molina was bleeding from his hand and a rock was laying inside of his apartment, next to the broken window. Martone then became combative as officers took her into custody. She was booked into jail and charged with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon (without intent to kill), battery, criminal mischief, unarmed burglary of an occupied structure, and battery on an officer, firefighter, emt, etc. Her bond was set at $9,000. According to court records, this was not her first arrest. In March 2011, she was jailed on charges of driving while intoxicated and possession of a harmful drug without a prescription. She had also been arrested for drunken disorderly conduct and disturbance of the peace.
Tech Support Pits From: Christie Re: Flash for digital camera Dear Webby, what kind of flash do you recommend for a digital camera ? The built in flash is only good for about 4 - 5 feet. Thanks Christie Dear Christie That would depend on the type of camera you have. As a rule of thumb, the smaller the lens, the bigger the flash needs to be for the picture to reach beyond a short range. With a super compact camera that has a pea sized lens, you need the most powerful flash you can get. With a big zoom camera like for example the Canon Rebel, regular room lighting is plenty and you can even turn off the built in flash. That gives you a much more natural picture and much better contrast. A flash that is close to the lens produces a flat image. With a handheld slave flash, placed at least an arms length to the side of you, you will get proper shadows and 3 dimensional depth to the picture. Unfortunately, a flash creates very harsh and sharp shadows close up and quickly fades to vague shadows as the distance increases. With a camera that has a big lens and lets in more light, where light from a window or ceiling fixture is enough, you don't have that problem. Have FUN! DearWebby
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A fifteen year-old boy came home with a Porsche and his parents began to yell and scream, "Where did you get that car?" He calmly told them, "I bought it today." "With what money?" demanded his parents. We know what a Porsche costs.." "Well," said the! boy, "this one cost me fifteen dollars." So the parents began to yell even louder. "Who would sell a car like that for fifteen dollars?" they said. "It was the lady up the street," said the boy. I don't know her name-they just moved in. She saw me ride past on my bike and asked me if I wanted to buy a Porsche for fifteen dollars." "Oh my Goodness!," moaned the mother, "she must be a child abuser. Who knows what she will do next? John, you go right up there and see what's going on." So the boy's father walked up the street to the house where the lady lived and found her out in the yard calmly planting petunias! He introduced himself as the father of the boy to whom she had sold a Porsche for fifteen dollars and demanded to know why she did it. "Well," she said, "this morning I got a phone call from my husband. I thought he was on a business trip, but learned from a friend he has run off to Hawaii with his secretary and really doesn't intend to come back. He claimed he was stranded and asked me to sell his new Porsche and send him the money. So I did."
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Getting Last of the Chocolate Syrup This might seem like a little thing, but I was tired of not being able to get the last of the chocolate syrup out of the squeeze container, frugalista that I am. You know that awful spitting that it does at the end and it splatters all over your clothes and the kitchen walls? Aggravating, right? Next time you think no more will come out without the awful spitting, unscrew the top and pour some milk in, then put the top back on - tightly. Now shake like crazy (the container that is) and pour into a glass. Fill the rest of the glass with milk and enjoy. By Gloria from western NY Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
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A well known diplomat had just returned from a weekend at a stately country home. When he was asked by a friend whether or not he'd had a good time, he said, "If the soup had been as warm as the wine, the wine as old as the chicken, the chicken as tender as the upstairs maid, and the maid as willing and eager as the Lady of the house, it would have been perfect."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Every morning for years, at about 11:30, the telephone operator in a small Sierra-Nevada town received a call from a man asking the exact time. One day the operator summed up nerve enough to ask him why the regularity. "I'm foreman of the local sawmill," he explained. "Every day I have to blow the whistle at noon so I call you to get the exact time." The operator giggled, "That's really funny," she said. "All this time we've been setting our clock by your whistle.
» the Back 9


Today in 
1626 Farukh, tyrannical Governor of Jerusalem, driven out
1640 Portugal regains independence after 60 years of Spanish rule
1641 Massachusetts becomes 1st colony to give statutory
   recognition to slavery 
1742 Empress Elisabeth orders expulsion of all Jews from Russia 
1783 Charles & M N Roberts ascend 2,000' in a hydrogen balloon
1804 Emperor Napoleon marries Joséphine of Martinique
1831 Erie Canal closes for entire month due to cold weather 
1903 "The Great Train Robbery", the 1st Western film, released 
1909 1st Israeli kibbutz founded, Deganya Alef 
1913 1st drive-up gasoline station opens (Pittsburgh) 
1913 Continuous moving assembly line introduced by Ford 
   (car every 2:38) 
1929 Game of BINGO invented by Edwin S Lowe
1936 Bell Labs tests coaxial cable for TV use 
1936 EW Brundin & FF Lyon obtain patent on soilless 
   culture of plants 
1939 SS-Führer Himmler begins deportation of Polish Jews 
1941 British cruiser Devonshire sinks German sub Python 
1951 Golden Gate Bridge closes due to high winds 
1959 The 1st color photograph of Earth received from outer space 
1965 Airlift of refugees from Cuba to US began 
1984 France performs nuclear test
1987 Digging begins to link England & France under the 
  English Channel 
1990 British & French workers meet in English Channel's  
   tunnel (Chunnel) 
1991 Ukranian people vote for independence 
1994 PTL leader Jim Bakker released from jail 
2012  smiled


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Humor: BCC for forwards 



Good Morning,  !
Today is Friday, November 23
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!



I was surprised that there was no mail at all about
"The sexiest man alive" article. 

Have FUN!
DearWebby


If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

The scientists of today think deeply instead of clearly. One must be sane to think clearly, but one can think deeply and be quite insane. --- Nikola Tesla
A woman goes to the local psychic in hopes of contacting her dearly departed grandmother. After she pays her fee, the psychic's eyelids begin fluttering, her voice begins warbling, her hands float up above the table, and she begins moaning. Eventually, a coherent voice emanates, saying, "Granddaughter? Are you there?" The customer, wide-eyed and on the edge of her seat, responds, "Grandmother? Is that you?" "Yes granddaughter, it's me." "It's really, really you, grandmother?", the woman repeats. "Yes, it's really me, granddaughter." The woman looks puzzled, "You're sure it's you, grandmother?" "Yes, granddaughter, I'm sure it's me." The woman pauses a moment, "Grandmother, I have just one question for you." "Anything, my child." "Grandmother, when did you learn to speak English?"
>From Boris Things are always going wrong with a house. Yesterday, my wife called the plumber and when he came in he said, "Where's the drip?" She said, "Upstairs trying to fix the leak!"
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to William Bailey. 43, Canton, Ohio Sentenced To A Month In Jail After Taunting 10-Year-Old Girl With Cerebral Palsy At Bus Stop Reported by The Weekly Vice William Bailey, a 43-year-old Ohio man, was sentenced to a month in jail Tuesday after he was found guilty of harassing a 10-year-old girl with cerebral palsy by imitating the way she walks. According to police, an investigation was launched in September of this year after Bailey was caught on video taunting the girl at a bus stop. Investigators say victim, 10-year-old Hope Holcomb-Knight, was being harassed by kids on the school bus - but the situation got worse when Bailey joined in humiliation by dragging his leg behind him as he walked his son to their car at the bus stop. Bailey's son also mocked the girl by dragging his leg behind him. The incident was recorded on a cell phone camera by a family member who was waiting inside her car at the bus stop. The video was uploaded to YouTube and went viral as a result, and the publicity more or less forced the cops to do something about it. "It makes me sick too, to think that a grown man would tease a 10-year-old disabled girl that has never done a thing to any of them for no reason," said Mike Knight to a local news reporter. "Now she doesn't want to get on the bus and go to school." The taunting was reportedly just one of several incidents of harassment that have occurred between the two families over the past two years. Bailey, who lives next door to the Knight family, was arrested and charged with aggravated menacing and disorderly conduct. At trial, Bailey reportedly pleaded 'no contest' to the charges and was sentence to 29 days in jail.
Tech Support Pits From: Bruce Re: BCC Dear Webby, I receive forwarded e-mails with lots of valid addresses in them. I've been bugging people to cut and paste just the contents and to use BCC on e-mails. I contend that it will prevent lots of valid e-mail addresses from eventually being forwarded inadvertently to spammers. This doesn't always make me popular, because it's slightly more difficult. Am I just blowing smoke here? Thanks for the newsletter, Bruce Dear Bruce You are 100% right. Most of those silly forwards are just gullibility traps started by spammers. They want to harvest the most gullible newbies, so that they can sell their snake oil and fake Rolexes to them, and get them subscribed to Honest Abe's Stockmarket Tips. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Thanks to Ross for these stats: Doctors: (A) The number of doctors in the US is 700,000 (B) Accidental deaths caused by physicians per year are 120,000 (C) Accidental deaths per physician is 17.14% Statistics courtesy of the US Dept. of Health &Human Services Guns: (A) The number of gun owners in the US is 80,000,000 (yes that's 80 million) (B) The number of accidental gun deaths per year, all age groups, is 1,500. (C) The number of accidental deaths per gun owner is 0.001875% Statistics courtesy of the FBI So statistically, doctors are approximately 9,000 times more dangerous than gun owners. Remember, guns don't kill people, doctors do. FACT: NOT EVERYONE HAS A GUN, BUT ALMOST EVERYONE HAS A DOCTOR. Please alert your friends to this alarming threat. We should ban doctors before this gets completely out of hand! Out of concern for the public at large, I have withheld statistics on lawyers for fear the shock would cause people to panic and seek medical attention. Ross
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Organizing Curling Irons With teen girls in the house, it is a pain to keep curling irons, hair dryer, flat iron, etc tidy. I had an extra clean wastebasket (the small kind) and had an idea. It fits under my sink and I stand all of the above appliances inside. What a help! :) By Carol from Landisville, PA Pockets made from sawed off jeans or pants and hung like Chritmas stockings keep everybody's stuff neatly separated. Everybody can grab THEIR pocket, take it to the mirror or wherever, and when done, return it. You can even have a couple of pockets for guests. Have FUN! DearWebby Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
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A minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building. Therefore, he talked with the organist to see what kind of inspirational music she could play after the announcement about the finances to get the congregation in a giving mood. "Don't worry," she said. "I'll think of something." During the service, the minister paused and said, "Brothers and Sisters, we are in great difficulty; the roof repairs cost twice as much as we expected, and we need $4,000 more. Any of you who can pledge $100 or more, please stand up." Just at that moment, the organist started playing, "The Star Spangled Banner."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
A young couple got married and left on their honeymoon. When they got back, the bride immediately called her mother. Her mother asked, "How was the honeymoon?" "Oh, mama," she replied, "the honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic..." Suddenly she burst out crying. "But, mama, as soon as we returned Sam started using the most horrible language... things I'd never heard before! I mean, all these awful 4-letter words! You've got to come get me and take me home.... Please mama!" "Sarah, Sarah," her mother said, "calm down! Tell me, what could be so awful? What 4-letter words?" "Please don't make me tell you, mama," wept the daughter, "I'm so embarrassed they're just too awful! Come get me, please!" "Darling, baby, you must tell me what has you so upset. Tell your mother these horrible 4-letter words!" Still sobbing, the bride said, "Oh, mama...words like DUST, WASH, IRON, COOK...!"
» Snow & Ice Patterns


Today in 
1782 Britain signs agreement recognizing US independence
1803 Spain cedes her claims to Louisiana Territory to France 
1866 Work begins on 1st US underwater highway tunnel, Chicago 
1886 1st commercially successful American AC electric power 
   plant opens, Buffalo 
1924 1st photo facsimile transmitted across Atlantic by radio
1939 USSR invades Finland over a border dispute, causing
  Finland to ally with the Nazis until it becomes obvious, that 
  they will loose WWII. Then Finland switched to the winning side.
1947 Day after UN decree for Israel, Jewish settlements attacked 
1949 Chinese Communists captured Chungking 
1954 1st meteorite ( 8 lb ) known to strike a woman 
    (Liz Hodges-Sylacauga AL) 
1972 BBC bans Wings "Hi, Hi, Hi" 
1982 US sub Thomas Edison collides with US Navy 
   destroyer in So China Sea
1983 Radio Shack announces the Tandy Model 2000 
   computer (80186 chip) 
1991 93 cars & 11 truck accident near San Francisco 
   during a dust storm, 17 die 
2012  smiled


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Privacy and Fingerprint recognition 



Good Morning,  !
Today is Thursday, November 28

Thank you James in Australia!


The internet works in mysterious ways.





Details at metro-UK

Have FUN!
DearWebby


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What we call 'Progress' is the exchange of one nuisance for another nuisance. --- Havelock Ellis (1859 - 1939) Taxation with representation ain't so hot either. --- Gerald Barzan
"May I take your order?" the waiter asked. "Yes, how do you prepare your chickens?" "Nothing special, sir," he replied. "We just tell them straight out that they're going to die."
A friend and his wife were considering traveling to Alaska for a trip that the husband had long dreamed of taking. He kept talking about how great it would be to stay in a log cabin without electricity, to hunt moose, and drive a dog team instead of a car. "If I decided to live there permanently, away from civil- ization, what would you miss the most?" he asked his wife. She replied, "Initially probably you."
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Russell Rodgers, 32, Red Bluff, CA Jailed After Beating Elderly Man To The Ground "Because He Is Old" Reported by The Weekly Vice Russell Rodgers, a 32-year-old California bonehead was jailed Monday after he attacked a 74-year-old man inside a Burger King bathroom simply because the victim was elderly. According to Red Bluff Police, 74-year-old Bill Bayless was using the restroom inside a Red Bluff area Burger King when Rodgers launched an assault on him simply because of his age. Police say Rodgers slammed the victim in the face with the door, knocking him to the ground. When the victim tried to get up, Rodgers hit him again with the door, saying "That is what I do to old people." Before leaving the restroom, Rodgers allegedly told the victim "I knocked you down because you are old." Rodgers was located a few hours later when he contacted the Tehama County Sheriff's Office to see why police were looking for him. Deputies convinced Rodgers to meet them at a local business where he was immediately taken into custody. Investigators say they are familiar with Rodgers, who lives in an encampment along the Sacramento River near the Antelope Blvd Bridge. "We've had several reports of verbal and physical disturbances with a subject matching his description," said Sgt. Michael Graham. Rodgers was booked into jail and charged with assault with a deadly weapon and elder abuse.
Tech Support Pits From: Vincenne Re: Fingerprint recognition and privacy Dear Webby You wrote that the cops use a different language for their fingerprints, and could not use the ones from doors and checkpoints. I am sure, if they wanted to, they cold use the checkpoint fingerprints. Vincenne Dear Vinenne The system the cops use ues vectors, descriptors of lines and curves. Keypads use dots. Both use side-lighting for contrast, and a crude scanner, that just knows black and white. While the police system then analyzes the lines and curves. The keypads overlay the scan with a mask, that has a whole bunch of tiny holes in it. If it sees a black dot in a hole, it records that as a 1, if it sees a white dot in that hole, it's a zero. It does that for all the holes. That mehod is good enough to recognize insiders, that have been recorded recently, but would be totally useless for the cops. In addition to that, a keypad has absolutely no information about you. It just knows that your thumb print pattern means User #3456. That's all. If somebody pried off that keypad and took it, it would not do them any good. Without the connection to the system it won't do anything, and when connected to a diferent system, it would cause permanent confusion with all the thumbs in it from people, who don't work over there. The reason the fingerprint recognition system works so well is because it is so simple. There has never been any abuse. Have FUN! DearWebby
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>From Penny Hostess Bakery Hostess Bakery plants shut down Friday due to a workers strike. It was Split up. The State Department hired all the Twinkies, the Secret Service Hired all the HoHos, the generals are sleeping with the Cupcakes and the Voters sent all the Ding Dongs to Congress. Penny
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Use Paper Clips to Hang Ornaments Are you trying to hang a Christmas ornament on the tree but you can't find your hooks? Take a paper clip and unfold it (lift the outer loop up as if you were opening a lid) so it is in the shape of a letter S. Hang your ornament on the bottom of the S and use the top to attach it to the tree! Instant hook and it is adjustable. By Trieschman from Carmel, IN Theoretically ALL dead fluorescent lights should be brought to approved disposal centers, along with baby thermometers. Old-fashioned NorthAmerican made lightbulbs can be disposed of in any way you feel like. Have FUN! DearWebby Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
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This is a Classic from the days, when Chirac was president of France. Jacques Chirac, The French President, is sitting in his office when his telephone rings. "Hallo, Mr. Chirac!" a heavily accented voice said. "This is Paddy Down at the Harp Pub in County Clare, Ireland. I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring war on ye!" "Well, Paddy," Chirac replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is your army?" "Right now," says Paddy, after a moment's calculation, "there is meself, me Cousin Sean, me next door neighbour Seamus, and the entire darts team from the pub. That makes eight!" Chirac paused. "I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 100,000 men in my army waiting to move on my command." "Begoora!" says Paddy. "I'll have to ring you back." Sure enough, the next day, Paddy calls again. "Mr. Chirac, the war is stil on. We have managed to get us some infantry equipment!" "And what equipment would that be Paddy?" Chirac asks. "Well, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Murphy's farm tractor," answers Paddy. Chirac sighs amused. "I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 6,000 tanks and 5,000 armored personnel carriers. Also, I have increased my army to 150,000 since we last spoke." "Saints preserve us!" says Paddy. "I'll have to get back to you." Sure enough, Paddy rings again the next day. "Mr. Chirac, the war is still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne! We have modified Jackie McLaughlin's ultra-light with a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and four boyos from the Shamrock Pub have joined us as well!" Chirac was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat "I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 100 bombers and 200 fighter planes. My military bases are surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last spoke, I have increased my army to 200,000!" "Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!" says Paddy, "I will have to ring you back." Sure enough, Paddy calls again the next day. "Top o' the mornin', Mr. Chirac! I am sorry to inform you that we have had to call off the war." "Really? I am sorry to hear that," says Chirac. "Why the sudden change of heart?" "Well," says Paddy, "we had a long chat over a few jars of Guinness, and decided there is no damn way we can feed 200,000 prisoners."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Thanks to Sandie for this story: Muldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside with only a pet dog for company. One day the dog died, and Muldoon went to the parish priest and asked, "Father, me dog is dead. Could ya' be saying' a mass for the poor creature?" Father Patrick replied, "I'm afraid not; we cannot have services for an animal in the church. But there are some Baptists down the lane, and there's no tellin' what they believe. Maybe they'll do something for the creature." Muldoon said, "I'll go right away Father. Do ya' think $5,000 is enough to donate to them for the service?" Father Patrick exclaimed, "Holy Cow! Why didn't ya tell me the dog was Catholic?
» Snow & Ice Patterns


Today in 
1812 Napoleon's Grand Army crosses Berezina River 
   during retreat from Russia
1864 Colorado militia kills 150 peaceful Cheyenne Indians
1877 Thomas Edison demonstrates the hand-cranked
    phonograph 
1887 US receives rights to Pearl Harbor, on Oahu, Hawaii 
1929 Lt Cmdr Richard E Byrd sends "My calculations indicate 
  that we have reached the vicinity of the South Pole"
 (He was wrong) 
1944 John Hopkins hospital performs 1st open heart surgery 
1947 UN Gen Assembly partitions Palestine between 
   Arabs & Jews 
1951 1st underground atomic explosion, Frenchman Flat, NV
1961 Mercury-Atlas 5 carries a chimp (Enos) to orbit 
1965 Dale Cummings does 14,118 consecutive sit-ups
1975 Kilauea Volcano erupts in Hawaii 
1994 Russian aircraft bomb Chechen capital of Grozney 
2012  smiled


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