Wall filters 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Tuesday, March 3

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to an
Irish car burglar, who is dumber than a brick
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1945 During World War II, Finland changed to the winning side and
 declared war on the Axis. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History
______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Books to the ceiling, Books to the sky, My pile of books is a mile high. How I love them! How I need them! I'll have a long beard by the time I read them. --- Arnold Lobel ______________________________________________________ At a country-club party a young man was introduced to an attractive girl. Immediately she began flattering him outrageously. The guy liked the young lady, but was taken a bit aback by her fast and ardent pitch. He was amazed when after 30 minutes she seriously proposed marriage. "Look," he said. "We only met a half hour ago. How can you be so sure? We know nothing about each other." "You're wrong," she smiled. "For the past 5 years I've been working in the back of the bank where you have your account. I know all I need to know about you." ______________________________________________________ Being able to turn your grandchildren into spoiled brats is God's reward for not killing your children. ______________________________________________________ Click through for the big picture Loch Tay
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD and a Darwin Award goes to Irish Man ID and mugshot protected by Irish laws Dumber than a brick A would-be thief in Ireland attempted to break into a car by throwing a brick into the vehicle's window, only for the brick to bounce back and knock the man unconscious, CCTV video obtained by the Irish Independent shows. The owner of the nearby Pheasant pub and the car that fought back, Gerry Brady, came out to investigate and saw the man lying in a pool of his own blood. That's when the suspect attempted to blackmail him, he said. More from the Independent: “When the Gardaí picked him up, he started claiming that I attacked him. He was still telling them that in the station when I came in with the footage of him getting knocked out by his own brick.” “You should have heard the gardai laughing when they saw the video. They were in stitches. Credit to them, they were straight out when we called and found the guy within minutes.” The man was quickly collected by authorities, and the incident remains under investigation. Items he had stolen from other cars were returned. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Tom Re: Telephone filters Dear Webby, We get a lot of interference on our phones, too, because of DSL. Our ISP supplies filters which plug in at each phone jack, Unplug the phone line, insert the filter, plug the phone line into the back end of the filter and Voila!! No more static or interference. Hope this helps. tom Dear Tom If that helps, good for you! Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ A first-grade girl came home from school. She was very happy, and her Mom noticed this. Mom asked, "What makes you so happy today?" The girl said, "Mom, we learned how to make babies in school today!" Thinking that first grade was a bit early for that, she asked her daughter to tell her how. "It's easy, Mom -- you just drop the 'y', and add 'i-e-s', " the daughter said. ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Seedling Pots From Phone Book Pages I still tape my homemade seedling pots as I have not mastered the crimping technique. I would like to add though, if you have access to phone books, the pages are the perfect size for seedling pots. Without any cutting, and depending the size of your form and how the page is folded, you can make pots in a variety of sizes. Very small pots will require only one page, while large pots should be made with two to three layers of pages. By likekinds [63] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Several women, each trying to one-up the other, appeared in ourt, each accusing the others of causing the trouble they were having in the apartment building where they lived. The judge, with Solomon-like wisdom decreed, "Okay, I'm ready to hear the evidence...I'll hear the oldest first." The case was dismissed for lack of testimony. _____________________________________________________ My Grandmother is ninetyfive and still doesn't need glasses... She drinks straight out of the bottle. An elderly couple were eating breakfast in a restaurant one morning. Greg noticed something funny about Keli's ear and he said, "Keli, did you know you've got a suppository in your left ear?" Keli answered, "I have? A suppository?" She pulled it out and stared at it. Then she said, "Greg, I'm glad you saw this thing. Now I know why my farts sound so loud." _____________________________________________________
Beautifully painted feathers. The dogs and hawk are my favorite.

Today in 
1812 The U.S. Congress passed the first foreign aid bill. 
1817 The first commercial steamboat route from Louisville to 
 New Orleans was opened. 
1845 The U.S. Congress passed legislation overriding a 
 U.S. President’s veto. It was the first time the Congress 
 had achieved this. 
1857 Britain and France declared war on China. 
1878 Russia and the Ottomans signed the treaty of San Stenafano. 
 The treaty granted independence to Romania, Serbia, Montenegro, 
 and the autonomy of Bulgaria. 
1900 Striking miners in Germany returned to work. 
1903 In St. Louis, MO, Barney Gilmore was arrested for spitting. 
1903 The U.S. imposed a $2 head tax on immigrants. 
1904 Wilhelm II of Germany made the first recording of a political 
 document with Thomas Edison's cylinder. 
1905 The Russian Czar agreed to create an elected assembly. 
1906 A Frenchman tried the first flight in an airplane with tires. 
1908 The U.S. government declared open war on on U.S. anarchists. 
1909 Aviators Herring, Curtiss and Bishop announced that airplanes 
 would be made commercially in the U.S. 
1910 Nicaraguan rebels admitted defeat in open war and resorted to 
 guerrilla tactics in the hope of U.S. intervention. 
1918 The Treaty of Brest Litovsky was signed by Germany, Austria 
 and Russia. The treaty ended Russia's participation in WW I. 
1931 The "Star Spangled Banner," written by Francis Scott Key, was 
 adopted as the American national anthem. The song was originally 
 a poem known as "Defense of Fort McHenry." 
1939 In Bombay, Ghandi began a fast to protest the state's 
 autocratic rule. 
1941 Moscow denounced the Axis rule in Bulgaria. 
1945 During World War II, Finland changed to the winning side and
 declared war on the Axis. 
1952 The U.S. Supreme Court upheld New York's Feinberg Law that 
 banned Communist teachers in the U.S. 
1956 Morocco gained its independence. 
1969 Apollo 9 was launched by NASA to test a lunar module. 
1969 Sirhan Sirhan testified in a Los Angeles court that he 
 killed Robert Kennedy. 
1973 Japan disclosed its first defense plan since WWII. 
1974 About 350 people died when a Turkish Airlines DC-10 
 crashed just after takeoff from Orly Airport in Paris. 
1978 The remains of Charles Chaplin were stolen from his 
 grave in Cosier-sur-Vevey, Switzerland. The body was 
 recovered 11 weeks later near Lake Geneva. 
1980 The submarine Nautilus was decommissioned. The vessels 
 final voyage had ended on May 26, 1979. 
1987 The U.S. House of Representatives rejected a package of 
 $30 million in non-lethal aid for the Nicaraguan Contras. 
1991 Rodney King was severely beaten by Los Angeles police 
 officers. The scene was captured on amateur video.
1994 The Mexican government reached a peace agreement with 
 the Chiapas rebels. 
1995 A U.N. peacekeeping mission in Somalia ended. Several 
 gunmen were killed by U.S. Marines in Mogadishu while 
 overseeing the pull out of peacekeepers. 
1999 In Egypt, 19 people were killed when a bus plunged 
 into a Nile canal. 
1999 Bertrand Piccard and Brian Jones began their attempt to 
 circumnavigate the Earth in a hot air balloon non-stop. 
 They succeeded on March 20, 1999.
2015  smiled.


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Noisy telephone 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Monday, March 2

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a
Florida drunk, who torches his place, because niec
refuses to take him on a beer run.
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1866 Excelsior Needle Company began making sewing machine needles.
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition. Timothy Leary (1920 - 1996) ______________________________________________________ Musician Kid Rock came under fire for posting a photo of himself holding a cougar that he had just killed. People were outraged until they realized the cougar was one of the "Real Housewives of Orange County." ______________________________________________________ When Little Johnny's family moved into a new double wide trailer one of their former neighbors dropped by. Seeing Johnny out front, he asked, "So, how do you like your new place?" "It's terrific," Little Johnny answered. "I have my own room, my brother has his own room, and my sister has her own room. But poor mom is still in with dad." ______________________________________________________ Click through for the big picture
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD and a Darwin Award goes to Jerome Clemons, 44, Boynton Beach, Florida Burned ATV, house when niece refused 'beer run' When Jerome Clemons' niece refused to drive him to a liquor store, he got all fired up. So much so that he torched a vehicle and burned part of his home. Clemons, 44, was arrested and charged with one count of arson on Wednesday for the heated incident at his house in Boynton Beach, Florida. Clemons had already been drinking when he asked his niece, Robineisha Felton, to drive him to the liquor store to replenish the beer supply, the Florida Sun-Sentinel reports. When she declined, the two argued but Felton left because tempers had flared. Clemons' brother, James Clemons, who was also at the house, told police Jerome kept mumbling about how he was "tired of it all," the Miami New Times reports. The brother started making dinner when he observed Jerome pouring gas over a large area rug placed on top of a four-wheeled ATV. The suspect then allegedly set the ATV on fire with a lighter, according to a police report obtained by The Huffington Post. Soon, the rug, the ATV, a garbage can, and miscellaneous plates and clothing were all ablaze. James Clemons put out the fire with a garden hose before calling the police. Officers said Jerome Clemons had multiple burns, blisters and peeling skin on his right arm from his fingers to his shoulder. He also smelled of gasoline. He was taken to the hospital to be treated for second-degree burns before getting hauled off to jail. Although a corner of the house was burned, damage was minimal. This isn't Clemons first arrest in unique circumstances. In October, 2012, he charged with disorderly conduct after dialing 911 and telling the dispatcher he had a cold and wanted medical attention, according to the Palm Beach Post. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Wendy Re: Noisy Telephone Dear Webby, Pray you're having a fantastic holiday and that all is going well. My question is this: sometimes I need to be on the computer and also on the phone at the same time if there's a problem somewhere. I'm on DSL as we live in the country and there's no high-speed anything here! HA! HA! When I have the computer plugged into the phone jack on the wall and use a splitter to plug the phone in as well, there's so much static that you can't call anyone or hear anyone if anyone calls. So, I've taken the phone and plugged it into another jack in another room and all is well. Any idea what might be wrong and possibly how I can fix it? You've helped much in the past and I'm hoping you have the answer to this question as well. Cheers, Wendy Dear Wendy That could be due to different causes. If you got DSL, then the Internet is peeled off the line and separated, just like a different TV channel is separated from your TV feed. If you are trying to use the peeled off Internet line for phone purposes, then you probably get not much more than static. The other potential problem is static from the computer. I get that too. I have to plug in some distance away from the computer, but I can plug the base station in in the next room, and then use the wireless hand set right at the computer. The wireless connection is at a much higher frequency and not bothered by the static coming from the computer. Just try the same thing andplug in the base station as far away from the computer as possible. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Eleven people were hanging on a rope under a helicopter, ten men and one woman. The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one has to leave, because otherwise they are all going to fall. They were not able to name that person, until the woman held a very touching speech. She said that she will voluntarily let go of the rope, because as a woman she is used to giving up everything for her husband and kids, or for men in general, and was used to always making sacrifices with little in return. As soon as she finished her speech, all the men started clapping their hands. ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Seedling Pots From Phone Book Pages I still tape my homemade seedling pots as I have not mastered the crimping technique. I would like to add though, if you have access to phone books, the pages are the perfect size for seedling pots. Without any cutting, and depending the size of your form and how the page is folded, you can make pots in a variety of sizes. Very small pots will require only one page, while large pots should be made with two to three layers of pages. By likekinds [63] Brown paperbags work fine too, without putting toxins into your dirt. A dab of flour glue will quickly glue down errant corners. Brown paper completely disappears by mid summer. The easiest way to make seedling pots is to wet the brown paper, lay it over a plastic seedliing cup or plastic coffee cup, punch it down with a drinking glass or pill bottle, smooth the top edges and if necessary fold them inwards, and if necessary glue them with flour glue. (1 TBSP unbleached flour and enough water to turn it into a thick paste.) If the paper has been soaked a bit, it is limp and very cooperative. Seedling pots made from brown paper don't fall apart, when you transplant them from the germination trays to the garden. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ >From Arca Following the birth of my second child, I called our insurance company to inquire about my short-term disability policy. "I just had a baby," I proudly announced to the representative who picked up the phone. "Congratulations! I'll get all of your information and activate your policy," she assured me. After taking down basic facts like my name and address, she asked, "Was this a work-related incident?" _____________________________________________________ A motorist was on trial for hitting a pedestrian. The motorist's lawyer made this point: "Your honor, my client has been driving for over thirty years." To which the lawyer for the plaintiff retorted: "Your honor, if we are going to judge this case by experience, may I remind you that my client has been walking for over sixty years, and has never hit a car in all that time!" _____________________________________________________
A River Runs Through It

Today in 
1807 The U.S. Congress passed an act to "prohibit the 
 importation of slaves
1836 Texas declared its independence from Mexico and an 
 ad interim government was formed. 
1866 Excelsior Needle Company began making sewing machine 
 needles. 
1897 U.S. President Cleveland vetoed legislation 
 that would have required a literacy test for immigrants 
 entering the country. 
1899 Mount Rainier National Park in Washington was established 
 by the U.S. Congress. 
1900 The U.S. Congress voted to give $2 million in aid to 
 Puerto Rico. 
1901 The U.S. Congress passed the Platt amendment, which 
 limited Cuban autonomy as a condition for withdrawal of 
 U.S. troops. 
1903 The Martha Washington Hotel opened for business in 
 New York City. The hotel had 416 rooms and was the first 
 hotel exclusively for women. 
1906 A tornado in Mississippi killed 33 and did $5 million 
 in damage. 
1907 In Hamburg, Germany, dock workers went on strike after 
 the end of the night shift. British strike breakers were 
 brought in. The issue was settled on April 22, 1907. 
1908 In New York, the Committee of the Russian Republican 
 Administration was founded. 
1908 In Paris, Gabriel Lippmann introduced three-dimensional 
 color photography at the Academy of Sciences. 
1917 The Russian Revolution began with Czar Nicholas II 
 abdicating. 
1917 Citizens of Puerto Rico were granted U.S. citizenship 
 with the enactment of the Jones Act. 
1925 State and federal highway officials developed a nationwide 
 route-numbering system and adopted the familiar U.S. shield
 -shaped, numbered marker. 
1929 The U.S. Court of Customs & Patent Appeals was created
1933 The motion picture King Kong had its world premiere in
 New York. 
1946 Ho Chi Minh was elected President of Vietnam. 
1949 The B-50 Superfortress Lucky Lady II landed in Fort Worth,
 TX. The American plane had completed the first non-stop 
 around-the-world flight. 
1969 In Toulouse, France, the supersonic transport Concorde 
 made its first test flight. 
1983 The U.S.S.R. performed an underground nuclear test. 
1984 The first McDonald's franchise was closed. A new location 
 was opened across the street from the old location in 
 Des Plaines, IL. 
1985 The U.S. government approved a screening test for AIDS 
 that detected antibodies to the virus that allowed possibly 
 contaminated blood to be kept out of the blood supply. 
1986 Corazon Aquino was sworn into office as president of 
 the Philippines. Her first public declaration was to restore 
 the civil rights of the citizens of her country. 
1987 The U.S. government reported that the median price for a 
 new home had gone over $100,000 for the first time. 
1989 Representatives from the 12 European Community nations all 
 agreed to ban all production of CFCs (chlorofluorocarbons) by 
 the end of the 20th century. 
1995 Russian anti-corruption journalist Vladislav Listyev was 
 killed by a gunman in Moscow. 
1995 Nick Leeson was arrested for his role in the collapse 
 of Britain's Barings Bank. 
1998 Images from the American spacecraft Galileo indicated 
 that the Jupiter moon Europa has a liquid ocean and a source 
 of interior heat. 
2000 In Great Britain, Chile's former President Augusto Pinochet 
 Ugarte was freed from house arrest and allowed to return to Chile. 
 Britain's Home Secretary Jack Straw had concluded that Pinochet 
 was mentally and physically unable to stand trial. Belgium, France, 
 Spain and Switzerland had sought the former Chilean leader on 
 human-rights violations. 
2003 Over the Sea of Japan, there was a confrontation between four 
 armed North Korean fighter jets and a U.S. RC-135S Cobra Ball. 
 No shots were fired in the encounter in international airspace 
 about 150 miles off North Korea's coast. The U.S. Air Force 
 announced that it would resume reconnaissance flights on March 12. 
2004 NASA announced that the Mars rover Opportunity had discovered 
 evidence that water had existed on Mars in the past. 
2015  smiled.


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How to make your own business cards 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Sunday, March 1

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to  
Hawaiian crooks who were arrested for stealing donations jar
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1873 E. Remington and Sons of Ilion, NY, began the 
 manufacturing the first practical typewriter. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks. --- Steve Martin (1945 - ) ______________________________________________________ I asked Mom if I was a gifted child... she said they certainly wouldn't have paid for me. ______________________________________________________ Children are natural mimics, who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners. ______________________________________________________ Click through for the big picture
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD and a Darwin Award goes to Jeffrey Kleinschmidt, 57, Kristin Johnson, 45, Pahoa Hawaii Hawaiian crooks arrested for stealing donations jar A man and woman were arrested by Hawaii police on Wednesday after video surveillance allegedly showed them stealing a jar of donations for a young girl fighting for her life. The footage shows Jeffrey Kleinschmidt, 57, and Kristin Johnson, 45, inside a Big Island smoke shop on Monday. Kleinschmidt can allegedly be seen removing the donation jar from a countertop and shoving it into his pants when an employee turns away. The shop's manager, Jose Miranda, said he set up the jar in an effort to raise money for Madisyn Tamaki, an 8-year-old who is in desperate need of a heart transplant. The couple was taken into custody after being recognized at another Big Island smoke shop. Miranda was able to pick them out of a line-up on Wednesday afternoon. According to local news outlet KITV, Kleinschmidt was charged with theft following the pair's arrest. According to Hawaii News Now, police records indicate that he has 31 prior offenses. Johnson, however, has been released pending further investigation. Miranda said the best thing to come out of the situation was an outpouring of community support for Tamaki. "People calling us wanting to replace the money that was taken. A few people called saying they wanted to donate double what was taken. It just was unreal the support that's flowing from this situation for her," he told Hawaii News Now. Tamaki was recently transported to Seattle Children's Hospital where she awaits a heart transplant. She is in critical but stable condition.4______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Alfred Re: Business cards Dear Webby, How good are do-it-yourself business cards? And how do I make them? Alfred Dear Alfred Today's do-it-yourself business cards are every bit as good as those from print shops. You can get the blanks at Staples and similar office product stores. Then go to http://avery.com/print and either select one of their thousands of pre-made templates or select ablank one, and paste your pre-made picture into it. Selecting your perfect template is the big challenge. Lots of them are good, some are great. Once you have selected one and typed in your info, select print. Make sure you don't have printing set to "fit to page". That would ruin their formatting. Take that checkmark off, and let it rip. Afterward you just have to break the cards along the perforations. I found that works best with about 5 sheets at a time. Done! Then you just have to find or make a box to keep them in. Staples will donate a folded up business card box with their logos and ads printed all over it. They work very well for me. If you don't want their ads on it, use it as a termplate and make your own box. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ A fellow who's just reached his 150th birthday was giving a press conference to the assembled media. "Excuse me, sir," one of the reporters said, "but how did you come to live to 150? "It's actually quite simple," the old fellow replied. "I just never argue." "That's impossible," the reporter responded. "There must be something else, like diet, or meditation, or something. Just not arguing won't keep you alive for 150 years!" The old fellow shrugged his shoulders and said: "Hmmm, could be you're right." ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Damp Cloth Keeps Cutting Board from Slipping In order to keep the cutting board from sliding around while slicing potatoes, put a slightly damp washcloth under it. Here I am perilously close to a hundred and I didn't know this! Source: My son, Steve showed me this one. By Marty Dick [149] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Parking in the driveway after their first date, Roger leaned over and gave Linda a passionate kiss. When she responded warmly, he unzipped his fly and pulled her hand towards it. Furious, Linda opened the door and jumped out of the car. "I've got just two words for you," she screamed. "Drop dead!" And I've got just two words for you," Roger screamed back. "Let go!" _____________________________________________________ At a country-club party a young man was introduced to an attractive girl. Immediately she began flattering him outrageously. The guy liked the young lady, but was taken a bit aback by her fast and ardent pitch. He was amazed when after 30 minutes she seriously proposed marriage. "Look," he said. "We only met a half hour ago. How can you be so sure? We know nothing about each other." "You're wrong," she smiled. "For the past 5 years I've been working in the back of the bank where you have your account. I know all I need to know about you." _____________________________________________________
She's got you......

Today in 
1498 Vasco de Gama landed at what is now Mozambique on his 
 way to India. 
1562 In Vassy, France, Catholics massacred over 1,000 
 Huguenots. The event started the First War of Religion. 
1692 In Salem Village, in the Massachusetts Bay Colony, 
 the Salem witch trials began. Four women were the first 
 to be charged. 
1784 In Great Britain, E. Kidner opened the first 
 cooking school. 
1810 Sweden became the first country to appoint an Ombudsman, 
 Lars August Mannerheim. 
1811 Egyptian ruler Mohammed Ali massacred the leaders of 
 the Mameluke dynasty. 
1815 Napoleon returned to France from the island of Elba. 
 He had been forced to abdicate in April of 1814.
1845 U.S. President Tyler signed the congressional resolution 
 to annex the Republic of Texas. 
1862 Prussia formally recognized the Kingdom of Italy. 
1864 Louis Ducos de Hauron patented a machine for taking 
 and projecting motion pictures. The machine was never built. 
1869 Postage stamps with scenes were issued for the first time. 
1872 The U.S. Congress authorized the creation of Yellowstone 
 National Park. It was the world's first national park. 
1873 E. Remington and Sons of Ilion, NY, began the 
 manufacturing the first practical typewriter. 
1879 The library of Hawaii was established. 
1896 The Battle of Adowa began in Ethiopia between the forces 
 of Emperor Menelik II and Italian troops. 
 The Italians were defeated. 
1900 In South Africa, Ladysmith was relieved by British troops
 after being under siege by the Boers for more than four months.
1907 In Odessa, Russia, there were only about 15,000 Jews 
 left due to evacuations. 
1907 In Spain, a royal decree abolished civil marriages. 
1907 In New York, the Salvation Army opened an anti-suicide 
 bureau. 
1912 Captain Albert Berry made the first parachute jump 
 from a moving airplane. 
1927 The Bank of Italy became a National Bank. 
1932 The 22-month-old son of Charles and Anne Lindbergh 
 was kidnapped. The child was found dead in May. 
1937 U.S. Steel raised workers’ wages to $5 a day. 
1937 In Connecticut, the first permanent automobile license 
 plates were issued. 
1941 FM Radio began in Nashville, TN, when station W47NV 
 began operations. 
1941 Bulgaria joined the Axis powers by signing the 
 Tripartite Pact. 
1947 The International Monetary Fund began operations. 
1949 Joe Louis announced that he was retiring from boxing 
 as world heavyweight boxing champion. 
1950 Klaus Fuchs was convicted of giving U.S. atomic 
 secrets to the Soviet Union. 
1954 The United States announced that it had conducted a 
 hydrogen bomb test on the Bikini Atoll in the Pacific Ocean. 
1954 Five U.S. congressmen were wounded when four Puerto Rican 
 nationalists opened fire from the gallery of the U.S. House 
 of Representatives. 
1959 Archbishop Makarios returned to Cyprus from exile. 
1961 The Peace Corps was established by U.S. President Kennedy. 
1966 The Soviet probe, Venera 3 crashed on the planet Venus. 
 It was the first unmanned spacecraft to land on the surface 
 of another planet. 
1966 Ghana ordered all Soviet, East German and Chinese 
 technicians to leave the country. 
1971 A bomb exploded in a restroom in the Senate wing of 
 the U.S. Capitol. There were no injuries. A U.S. group 
 protesting the Vietnam War claimed responsibility. 
1974 Seven people were indicted in connection with the 
 Watergate break-in. 1984 The U.S.S.R. performed a nuclear 
 test at Eastern Kazakhstan, Semipalatinsk, U.S.S.R. 
1987 S&H Green Stamps became S&H Green Seals. The stamps 
 were introduced 90 years earlier. 
1988 Soviet troops were sent into Azerbaijan after ethnic 
 riots between Armenians and Azerbaijanis. 
1989 In Washington, DC, Mayor Barry and the City council 
 imposed a curfew on minors. 
1990 In Cairo, 16 people were killed in a fire at the 
 Sheraton Hotel. 
1992 Bosnian Serb snipers fired upon civilians after a 
 majority of the Moslem and Croatian communities voted in 
 favor of Bosnia's independence. 
1992 King Fahd of Saudi Arabia announced major political 
 reforms that ceded some powers after 10 years of 
 disciplined rule. 
1992 Bosnian Muslims and Croats voted to secede from Yugoslavia. 
1993 The U.S. government announced that the number of 
 food stamp recipients had reached a record number of 26.6 million. 
1994 Israel released about 500 Arab prisoners in an effort to 
 placate Palestinians over the Hebron massacre. 
1995 The European Parliament rejected legislation that would
 have allowed biotechnology companies to patent new life forms. 
1995 Yahoo! was incorporated. 
1999 The Angolan Embassy in Lusaka, Zambia, exploded. Four 
 other bombs went off in the capital. 
1999 In Uganda, eight tourists were brutally murdered by 
 Hutu rebels. 
2002 Operation Anaconda began in eastern Afghanistan. Allied 
forces were fighting against Taliban and Al Quaida fighters. 
2003 In the U.S., approximately 180,000 personnel from 22 
 different organizations around the government became part 
 of the Department of Homeland Security. This completed the 
 largest government reorganization since the beginning of 
 the Cold War. 
2003 Khalid Shaikh Mohammed was captured by CIA and Pakistani 
 agents near Islamabad. He was the suspected mastermind 
 behind the terrorist attacks on the United States on September 11, 2001.
02015  smiled.


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Turn pictures into wallpaper 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Saturday, February 28

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to an 
Iowa mother, who kicked daughter while drunk 
on hand sanitizer
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1849 Regular steamboat service to California via Cape Horn 
 arrived in San Francisco for the first time. The SS California 
 had left New York Harbor on October 6, 1848. The trip took 4 
 months and 21 days. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Writing is the only profession where no one considers you ridiculous if you earn no money. --- Jules Renard (1864 - 1910) Freedom of the press is limited to those who own one. --- A. J. Liebling (1904 - 1963) ______________________________________________________ A fellow decided to decorate his bedroom. He wasn't sure how many rolls of wallpaper he would need but he knew that the Irishman who lived next door had recently done the same job and the two rooms were identical in size. "Murphy," he asked, "How many rolls of wallpaper did you buy for your bedroom?" "Twenty" said Murphy. So the fellow bought the twenty rolls of paper and did the job. It looked wonderful, but he had 12 rolls of wallpaper left over. "Murphy," he said. "I bought twenty rolls of wallpaper for the bedroom, but I've got 12 left over!" "Dat's funny," said Murphy. "So did I." ______________________________________________________ Miss Prissy was going over Melvin's records with his anxious parents. On one page was the statement, "Melvin used fowl language today." Mr. Messpot, hoping to put the teacher in a bad light, snickered, "Ha! You spelled foul wrong." Miss Prussy corrected, "No, I meant F-O-W-L. Your child called me a 'dumb cluck' ." ______________________________________________________ Click through for the big picture
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD and a Darwin Award goes to Jennifer Jane Olney, 48, Des Moines, Iowa Kicked Daughter While Drunk On Hand Sanitizer A mother in West Des Moines, Iowa, is facing child endangerment charges after allegedly kicking her daughter while drunk on hand sanitizer. Jennifer Jane Olney, 48, was arrested Tuesday after officers responded to a report of medication and alcohol hand sanitizer overdose at her residence, KCCI.com reports. Police said Olney's speech was slurred and she was acting aggressively. Witnesses told the responding officers that Olney had been behaving erratically and threatened to take all of her medications at once. She allegedly called her daughter's elementary school to scream at employees, according to the Des Moines Register. Olney's mental state was such that her father went in her place to pick up the girl at school. After talking with Olney, officers gave her two choices: Turn her daughter over to the Iowa Department of Human Services, or check herself into a hospital for treatment, according to the New York Daily News. After much crying and yelling, Olney agreed to seek help. She then got off the couch and allegedly kicked her daughter in the leg, which caused the girl to burst into tears. When officers went to arrest Olney, she allegedly fought back by kicking and screaming, the Des Moines Register reports. Olney was charged with child endangerment and interference with official acts inflicting bodily injury. She’s being held at the Polk County Jail on $3,000 bond. The daughter was left in her grandfather’s care, according to the Associated Press. 4______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Puzzled Pat Re: turn pictures into wallpaper Dear Webby, Some of your pictures are very nice, and would look nice as wallpaper on my home page. When I right click on the icture, I do not wee options to SAVE AS WALLPAPER. Can you tell me step-by-step how to save the picture, and then use it as wallpaper on my computer? I would be grateful if you could. Signed, Puzzled Dear Puzzled Pat Most browsers have lost that ability. With Chrome you can get an extension to do that. Desktop Wallpaper Tool With that you can turn your own, saved images into wallpaper, or anything you can sang on the web. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ There's this old priest who got sick of all the people in his parish who kept confessing to adultery. One Sunday, in the pulpit, he said, "If I hear that word one more time, I'll quit!" Everyone liked him, so they came up with a code word. Someone who had committed adultery would say they had "fallen." This seemed to satisfy the old priest and things went well, until the priest died at a ripe old age. About a week after the new priest arrived, he visited the mayor of the town and seemed very concerned. The priest said, "You have to do something about the roads and sidewalks in town. When people come into the confessional, they keep talking about having fallen." The mayor started to laugh, realizing that no one had told the new priest about the code word. Before the mayor could explain, the priest shook an accusing finger at the mayor and said, "I don't know what you're laughing about, your own wife fell three times this week already, and your daughter fell twice!" ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Damp Cloth Keeps Cutting Board from Slipping In order to keep the cutting board from sliding around while slicing potatoes, put a slightly damp washcloth under it. Here I am perilously close to a hundred and I didn't know this! Source: My son, Steve showed me this one. By Marty Dick [149] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Son: Why is Father singing to the baby so much tonight? Mother: He is trying to sing her asleep. Son: Well, If I were her, I'd pretend I was asleep. _____________________________________________________ A young mother paying a visit to a doctor friend and his wife made no attempt to restrain her five-year-old son, who was ransacking an adjoining room. But finally, an extra loud clatter of bottles did prompt her to say, "I hope you don't mind Johnny being in there." "No," said the doctor calmly, "He'll be quiet shortly. It sounds like he found the poisons." _____________________________________________________
She's got you......

Today in 
1844 Several people were killed aboard the USS Princeton 
 when a 12-inch gun exploded. 
1849 Regular steamboat service to California via Cape Horn 
 arrived in San Francisco for the first time. The SS California 
 had left New York Harbor on October 6, 1848. The trip took 4 
 months and 21 days. 
1854 The Republican Party was organized in Ripon, WI. About 50 
 slavery opponents began the new political group. 
1885 AT&T (American Telephone and Telegraph) was incorporated. 
 The company was capitalized on only $100,000 and provided long 
 distance service for American Bell. 
1893 Edward G. Acheson showed his patent for Carborundum. 
1911 Thomas A. Edison, Inc. was organized. 
1951 A Senate committee issued a report that stated that there 
 were at least two major crime syndicates in the U.S. 
 House and Senate?
1953 In a Cambridge University laboratory, scientists James D. 
 Watson and Francis H.C. Crick discovered the double-helix 
 structure of DNA. 
1956 A patent was issued to Forrester for a computer memory core. 
1983 "M*A*S*H" became the most watched television program in 
 history when the final episode aired. 
1986 Swedish Prime Minister Olof Palme was assassinated in 
 Stockholm.
1993 U.S. Federal agents raided the compound of an armed 
 religious cult in Waco, TX. The ATF had planned to arrest 
 the leader of the Branch Davidians, David Koresh, on federal 
 firearms charges. Four agents and six Davidians were killed 
 and a 51-day standoff followed. 
1994 NATO made its first military strike when U.S. F-16 
 fighters shot down four Bosnian Serb warplanes in violation 
 of a no-fly zone over central Bosnia. 
1995 The Denver International Airport opened after a 
 16-month delay. 
1998 Serbian police began a campaign to wipe out 
 "terrorist gangs" in the Yugoslav province of Kosovo. 
2001 The Northwest region of the U.S., including the state of 
 Washington, was hit by an earthquake that measured 6.9 on 
 the Richter Scale. There were no deaths reported. 
2002 In Ahmadabad, India, Hindus set fire to homes in a 
 Muslim neighborhood. At least 55 people were killed in 
 the attack. 
2002 Sotheby's auction house announced that it had identified 
 Peter Paul Reubens as the creator of the painting "The Massacre 
 of the Innocents." The painting was previously thought to be by 
 Jan van den Hoecke. 
2013 Benedict XVI resigned as pope. He was the first pope to 
 resign since Gregory XII in 1415 and the first to resign 
 voluntarily since Celestine V in 1294. 
2015  smiled.


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Is PC-Decrapifier safe? 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Friday, February 27
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!


Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to an 
Indecency Charge Filed Against Oregon 
Library Cam Girl
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1922 The U.S. Supreme Court upheld the 19th Amendment that 
 guaranteed women the right to vote. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly. --- Voltaire (1694 - 1778) The advantage of a classical education is that it enables you to despise the wealth that it prevents you from achieving. --- Russell Green ______________________________________________________ > From Daniel There is a medical distinction between Guts and Balls. We've all heard of people having Guts or having Balls. But do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, here are the definitions: GUTS - Is arriving home late after a night out with the boys, being met by your wife with a broom, and having the Guts to ask: 'Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?' BALLS - Is coming home late after a night out with the boys, smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the bum and having the Balls to say: 'You're next, Chubby.' I hope this clears up any confusion on the definitions. Medically, speaking there is no difference in the outcome. Both are fatal! ______________________________________________________ A fellow decides to take off early from work and go drinking. When he finally gets home, he starts tiptoeing up the stairs. Halfway up the stairs, he falls over backwards. An empty pint bottle in his back pocket broke, and carved up his buttocks. A few minutes later, as he was undressing, he noticed blood, so he checked himself out in the mirror and noticed the injury. He repaired the damage as well as he could under the circumstances and went to bed. The next morning, his head was hurting, and his rear was hurting, and he was hunkering under the covers trying to think up some good story, when his wife came into the bedroom. "Well, you really tied one on last night," she said. "Where'd you go?" "I worked late," he said, "and I stopped off for a couple of beers." "A couple of beers? That's a laugh," she replied. "You got plastered !" "What makes you so sure I got drunk last night, anyway?" he asked. "Well," she replied, "my first big clue was when I got up this morning and found a bunch of Band-Aids stuck to the mirror." ______________________________________________________ Click through for the big picture Extreme zoom
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD and a Darwin Award goes to Kendra Sunderland, 19, Corvallis, Oregon Indecency Charge Filed Against Library Cam Girl Prosecutors have filed a public indecency charge against the former Oregon State University student who last month filmed an X-rated webcam show inside the school’s main library, according to court records. Kendra Sunderland, 19, was named last week in a misdemeanor criminal information filed in Circuit Court in Benton County. The February 17 charging document alleges that Sunderland, a Corvallis resident, “did and with the intent of arousing the sexual desire of defendant or another person, expose her genitals” while inside the university’s Valley Library. Investigators allege that Sunderland’s lewd performance occurred on the evening of January 27 while she was seated at a desk on the library’s sixth floor. During her 31-minute webcam performance, Sunderland is seen exposing her breasts and vagina, masturbating, and licking herself. While doing this, she took typed directions from someone watching the action live online. Sunderland apparently used the library’s wi-fi connection to broadcast the webcam performance via her laptop. While Sunderland has attended Oregon State, she is not currently registered for classes. Sunderland is scheduled to be arraigned Thursday on the indecency charge, which carries a maximum one-year prison term and a $6250 fine. After the teenager enters a plea, a judge will set a status conference date, according to a court clerk. Sunderland has embraced the notoriety stemming from her illicit library antics. While continuing her webcam business, she has posed for Playboy, signed a deal to front for a sugar daddy web site, and done radio and TV interviews. Her Twitter account--which now has more than 74,000 followers--features a steady stream of racy photos and career updates (most of which include the hashtag “#LibraryGirl”). In a message yesterday, Sunderland reported, “Holy shit! I'm the 56th most popular pornstar on @Pornhub.” The arrest related publicity definitely propelled her career towards stardom. 4______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Punk Re: Highlight disappears? Dear Webby, Hope you are enjoying the time with your Dad. Glad both of you are able to visit and enjoy each other. I am curious about the following.... http://www.pcdecrapifier.com/download In reading their disclaimer they take no responsibility for anything. I did not purchase my PC off the shelf, I had it built with limited programs and have downloaded only McAfee and Mailwasher, MalwareBytes per your encouragement and recommendations. Do I need or should I download pcdecrapifier and if so is it truly safe? Be safe heading back Peace Frank Dear Frank Yes, it is quite safe. However, if you don't have crap on your machine, then you don't need it. The disclaimer is just for those, who use it to delete Windows or something, that they might still need. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Preventing Rust Rings To keep the unsightly 'rust rings' off your bath tub, put some clear nail polish on the bottom of your shaving cream container. By CDC from FL ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ During a phone conversation, my niece mentioned that she was taking a psychology course at university. "Oh, great," I said, "Now you'll be analyzing everyone in the family." "No, no," she replied. "I don't take abnormal psychology until next semester." _____________________________________________________ > From Max The other night I was waiting for a date getting ready to go out. She sat there and put on eyebrow pencil, eye shadow, eyeliner, eyelashes, mascara, toner, blush and lipstick and all kinds of stuff I don't even know the names of, then turned to me and said, "Does this look natural?" _____________________________________________________
Really Cool Pictures

Today in 
1700 The Pacific Island of New Britain was discovered. 
1827 New Orleans held its first Mardi Gras celebration. 
1861 In Warsaw, Russian troops fired on a crowd protesting 
 Russian rule over Poland. Five protesting marchers were 
 killed in the incident. 
1867 Dr. William G. Bonwill invented the dental mallet. 
1883 Oscar Hammerstein patented the first cigar-rolling 
 machine. 
1896 The "Charlotte Observer" published a picture of an X-ray 
 photograph made by Dr. H.L. Smith. The photograph showed a 
 perfect picture of all the bones of a hand and a bullet 
 that Smith had placed between the third and fourth fingers 
 in the palm. 
1900 In South Africa, the British received an unconditional 
 surrender from Boer Gen. Piet Cronje at Paardeberg. 
1922 The U.S. Supreme Court upheld the 19th Amendment that 
 guaranteed women the right to vote. 
1933 The Reichstag, Germany's parliament building in Berlin, 
 was set afire. The Nazis accused Communist for the fire. 
1949 Chaim Weizmann became the first Israeli president. 
1951 The 22nd Amendment to the U.S. Constitution was ratified, 
 limiting U.S. Presidents to two terms. 
1973 The American Indian Movement occupied Wouned Knee in 
 South Dakota. 
1981 Chrysler Corporation was granted an additional $400 million 
 in federal loan guarantees. Chrysler had posted a loss of 
 $1.7 billion in 1980. 
1982 Wayne B. Williams was convicted of murdering two of the 
 28 black children and young adults whose bodies were found in 
 Atlanta, GA, over a two-year period. 
1990 The Exxon Corporation and Exxon Shipping were indicted 
 on five criminal counts in reference to the 1989 Exxon Valdez 
 oil spill. 
1991 U.S. President George H.W. Bush announced live on television 
 that "Kuwait is liberated." 
1997 In Ireland, divorce became legal. 
1998 Britain's House of Lords agreed to give a monarch's 
 first-born daughter the same claim to the throne as any 
 first-born son. This was the end to 1,000 years of male 
 preference. 
2002 In Boston, twenty people working at Logan International Airport 
were charged with lying to get their jobs or security badges. 
2015  smiled.


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What to do when the Highlight disappears 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Thursday, February 26

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a 
Bank Robber Michael Cassano 
Arrested After he 
Stopped For Coffee
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1907 The U.S. Congress raised their own pay to $7500.
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
He who can, does. He who cannot, teaches. --- George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950), We are the people our parents warned us about. --- Jimmy Buffett ______________________________________________________ A Policeman recently stopped a woman for exceeding the posted speed limit. He asked the driver her name. She said, "I'm Mrs. Ladislav Abdulkhashim Zybkcicraznovskaya from the Republic of Uzbekistan visiting my daughter in Columbia." The cop put away his summons book and pen, and said, "Well, uhhh, ok, but don't let me catch you speeding again." ______________________________________________________ The young Ensign approached the crusty old Chief and asked him about the origin of the commissioned officer insignias. "Well, Ensign, it's history and tradition. First, we give you a gold bar representing that you're valuable BUT malleable. The silver bar of a Lieutenant Junior Grade represents value, but less malleable. When you make Lieutenant, you're twice as valuable so we give you two silver bars. "As a Captain, you soar over military masses, hence the eagle. As an Admiral, you're obviously a star. That answer your question?" "Yes, Sir, but what about Commanders and Lieutenant Commanders?" "Now that goes waaaaaay back in history. Back to the Garden of Eden even. You see, if you look at that stained glass window on the chapel over there, even in the Garden of Eden some things were always covered with leaves. " ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Sr Anna for this picture: Click through for the big picture
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD and a Darwin Award goes to Michael Cassano, 38, Oakland Gardens, New York Bank Robber Michael Cassano Arrested After he Stopped For Coffee Police arrested a man suspected of robbing a bank in New Jersey after they say he stopped for a cup of coffee a block away. Police say a man wearing a fedora hat approached a teller at the Hudson City Savings Bank in Lodi on Monday, placed a BB-gun on the counter and demanded money. The man fled with $4,000. Maywood Police Chief David Pegg tells The Record newspaper an officer spotted a man matching the description of the suspect near the entrance of a Dunkin Donuts drinking coffee. Pegg says after talking to 38-year-old Michael Cassano, officers discovered the gun and the cash. The Oakland Gardens, New York, resident is charged with robbery and two weapons offenses. 4______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Punk Re: Highlight disappears? Dear Webby, Just in the last few days I have had a problem. When I highlight something and then right click to copy, the highlight disappears. Today, I tied to highlight the de-craper website on your page. I can highlight, but when I right clicked to hit copy, the highlight disappeared. Thus, no copying. I haven't intentionally changed any setting. Thanks, Punk Dear Punk That is actually a fairly common complaint. On some web sites, where they have non-standard HTML, the problem is much worse than on sites with standard HTML. Any slight vibration of the ground or your table makes it worse. Luckily, there is a way around it. Click on the start of what you want to copy, hold down SHIFT move the cursor to the end of what you want to copy with the arrow keys, when the stuff you want to copy is all highlighted, hold down CTRL and hit C to copy it. ALT-TAB to the program you used previously, put the cursor where you want to insert the copied stuff Hold down CTRL and hit V to paste. This method does not cure the Alzheimers of your house foundation or of your table, but makes you totally independent of it. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Chandelier Makeover We just moved into our house that we have been renting out for several years and I noticed a few things are outdated. I hated the 70's era chandelier over the dining room table because of the smoked glass. I thought of replacing it with clear, textured stained glass to get more light. I was told what I wanted would cost about $400. For this much, I could replace most of the fixtures in the whole house! We do not have the budget right now to do this. As we were replacing broken acrylic panels over the florescent lights in the basement, I got an idea. I bought a 2 x 2 foot acrylic panel and cut it with a utility knife to the size of the smoked glass pieces. I drilled a hole in each and hung them. You can see how much more light there is because the background of the picture got so much darker. It sparkles like diamonds now, too. Total cost: $3.97! By lhegs from Green Bay, WI ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Dr. Finkman completed his examination of the teenage girl and took her mother aside. "I'm afraid," he said, "that your daughter has an STD." "Oh, my!" exclaimed the embarrassed woman. "Tell me, could she possibly have caught it in a public lavatory?" "It's possible," replied the M.D., "but it would certainly have been uncomfortable." _____________________________________________________ Why do Jewish men so often become doctors? Because a doctor can order a woman to undress without guilt, he can look at her without fear of being interrupted, and on best of all, it's usually her husband that pays for it all. _____________________________________________________ German scientists dug 50 meters underground and discovered small pieces of copper. After studying these pieces for a long time, Germany announced that the ancient Germans 25,000 years ago had a nation-wide telephone network. Naturally, the British government was not that easily impressed. They ordered their own scientists to dig too. 100 meters down, they found small pieces of glass and they soon announced that the ancient Brits 35,000 years ago already had a nationwide fiber network. Scottish scientists were outraged. They dug 200 meters underground, but found absolutely nothing. So they concluded that the ancient Scotts 55,000 years ago had cellular telephones under their kilts.. jmm
Really cool pictures.

Today in 
1815 Napoleon Bonaparte escaped from the Island of Elba. 
 He then began his second conquest of France. 
1848 The second French Republic was proclaimed. 
1870 In New York City, the first pneumatic-powered subway 
 line was opened to the public. 
1907 The U.S. Congress raised their own pay to $7500. 
1916 Mutual signed Charlie Chaplin to a film contract. 
1919 In Arizona, the Grand Canyon was established as a 
 National Park with an act of the U.S. Congress. 
1929 U.S. President Coolidge signed a bill creating the 
 Grand Teton National Park. 
1930 New York City installed traffic lights. 
1933 A ground-breaking ceremony was held at Crissy Field 
 for the Golden Gate Bridge. 
1945 In the U.S., a nationwide midnight curfew went into 
 effect. 
1952 British Prime Minister Winston Churchill announced 
 that Britain had developed an atomic bomb. 
1986 Corazon Aquino was inaugurated president of the 
 Philippines. Long time President Ferdinand Marcos went 
 into exile. 
1987 The U.S.S.R. conducted its first nuclear weapons test 
 after a 19-month moratorium period. 
1991 Iraqi President Saddam Hussein announced on Baghdad Radio 
 that Iraqi troops were being withdrawn from Kuwait. 
1993 Six people were killed and more than a thousand injured 
 when a van exploded in the parking garage beneath the World 
 Trade Center in New York City. The bomb had been built by 
 Islamic extremists. 
1995 Barings PLC collapsed after a securities dealer lost more 
 than $1.4 billion by gambling on Tokyo stock prices. The company 
 was Britain's oldest investment banking firm. 
1998 A Texas jury rejected an $11 million lawsuit by Texas 
 cattlemen who blamed Oprah Winfrey for price drop after on-air 
 comment about mad-cow disease. 
1998 In Oregon, a health panel rules that taxpayers must help 
 to pay for doctor-assisted suicides. 
2009 Former Serbian president Milan Milutinovic was acquitted 
 by the International Criminal Tribunal for the former Yugoslavia 
 regarding war crimes during the Kosovo War. 
2009 The Pentagon reveresed its 18-year policy of not allowing 
 media to cover returning war dead. The reversal allowed some 
 media coverage with family approval.
2015  smiled.


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Decrapifier 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Wednesday, February 25

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a 
Masked Gunman in Virginia, whose plan was foiled 
by the second amendment, all while on
the surveillance camera 
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1836 Samuel Colt received U.S. Patent No. 138 (later 9430X) 
 for a "revolving-cylinder pistol." 
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Example has more followers than reason. --- Christian Bohe ______________________________________________________ Here is a cute and clean Classic: Little Johnny's teacher asks him to make a sentence using the following words: defeat, deduct, defense and detail. Little Johnny says, "De feet of de duck went over de fence before de tail." ______________________________________________________ The Teacher asked Little Johnny, "How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?" Little Johnny replied, "Just Don't bite any." ______________________________________________________ Click through for the big picture
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD and a Darwin Award goes to Terry Gillenwater, 25, Pinch, West Virginia Masked Gunman’s Plan Foiled by the Second Amendment — and the Surveillance Camera Caught It All When a man wearing a bandanna over his face walked into a Pinch, West Virginia, pharmacy on Wednesday, a surveillance camera was rolling and Don Radcliff apparently tried using humor at first to diffuse the situation. The pharmacist tried to “feel the guy out” by joking with him, Good Family Pharmacy employee Chris Monk told the Charleston Gazette. “Are you here to rob me?” Monk recalled Radcliff asking as he pointed at the man. It was clearly no joke to the guy behind the makeshift mask, who then pulled out a gun. But Radcliff had a gun under his white pharmacy coat that he’d already been reaching for — and he used it, firing three times at the man, the Gazette reported. Radcliff’s first shot hit the suspect’s chest. The second shot hit the man’s gun, which jammed it. The third shot struck his midsection, the Gazette reported. A pharmacy employee told the Gazette that the man was attempting to shoot back during the few seconds the confrontation lasted. After Radcliff stopped firing, he and a pharmacy intern attempted to give the gunman first aid. Pharmacy employees told the Gazette that Radcliff asked, “Why did you make me do this?” and also said, “I didn’t mean to do this.” The man later died of his wounds, the paper said. The pharmacy didn’t close after the incident, the Gazette noted, adding that employees swept up glass from a broken window and then began attending to customers again. Pharmacy owner Joe Good — who was headed to his business when the shooting happened — took over for a broken-up Radcliff for the remainder of the day, the paper said Terry Gillenwater, 25, was pronounced dead at a hospital Wednesday, Kanawha County Sheriff’s Corporal Brian Humphreys told the Gazette in a follow-up article. No charges will be filed against Radcliff, Sergeant Sean Snuffer of the sheriff’s department told the Gazette; but final approval on that matter rests with the county prosecuting attorney, the paper added. Gillenwater “had a drug problem” and plead guilty in December 2014 to a charge of conspiracy to distribute oxycodone. Following his plea, he was placed in a deferment program. 4
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Jim Re: What is the name of that program? Dear Webby, A few weeks ago you mentioned a program that deleted the built-in trial programs from new computers. I just got a new computer and it is LOADED with junk. Programs pop up over my firefox tabs. So frustrating. I can't get anything done. Can you send me the name of your recommendation? Thank you, Your loyal subscriber from forever, Jim C DearJim Try Decrapifier http://www.pcdecrapifier.com/download Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Rubber Band To Tighten Paper Towel Holder My room mate is in a scooter. When she set up the paper towel roll on the door, she probably didn't expect to have the roll fall off the spindle arms when she pulled on it. This simple rubber band made the arms come in tighter so this doesn't happen. Even if you have one that is under the counter, this works. Just slide it over one end, then around the roll (it will close the arms if you try and do it before the roll is installed), and around the other end. By Sandi/Poor But Proud [418] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ Marietta phones up her husband at work for a chat. HIM "I'm sorry dear but I'm up to my neck in work today." HER "But I've got some good news and some bad news for you dear." HIM "OK darling, but as I've got no time now, just give me the good news." HER "Well, the air bag works." _____________________________________________________ Brian and Pete were talking about premarital sex and Brian says to Pete: "I never slept with my wife before marriage. Did you? " Pete replies: "I don't know, what was her maiden name?" _____________________________________________________ Don't tell this one in church: Two Greek virgins get married and go on their honeymoon. However, they have no idea what there supposed to do once they get to their hotel room. The newlyweds decide to call his mother and get some advice on what to do. The mother says that they should sit on the bed together and snuggle with each other and things should start to happen from there. The newlyweds start to do this but nothing else happens. He calls his mother back to find out what to do next. She says they should take their clothes off, get under the covers in bed, and nature should takes its course. The bride and groom take his mother's advice but still nothing. He calls his mother a third time. Getting frustrated with the situation she says, "Listen, just take the biggest thing you have and stick it in her hairiest thing!" and hangs up on him. A few minutes later he reluctantly calls his mother back, "Well, I have my nose in her armpit. What do I do next?"
Really cool pictures.

Today in 
1570 England's Queen Elizabeth I was excommunicated by 
 Pope Pius V. 
1751 Edward Willet displayed the first trained monkey 
 act in the U.S. 
1836 Samuel Colt received U.S. Patent No. 138 (later 9430X) 
 for a "revolving-cylinder pistol." 
1901 The United States Steel Corp. was incorporated by 
 J.P. Morgan. 
1913 The 16th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution was 
 ratified. It authorized a graduated (Marxist) income tax. 
1919 The state of Oregon became the first state to place a 
 tax on gasoline. The tax was 1 cent per gallon. 
1930 The bank check photographing device was patented. 
1933 The aircraft carrier Ranger was launched. It was the 
 first ship in the U.S. Navy to be designed and built from 
 the keel up as an aircraft carrier. 
1940 The New York Rangers and the Montreal Canadiens played 
 in the first hockey game to be televised in the U.S. The 
 game was aired on W2WBS in New York with one camera in a 
 fixed position. The Rangers beat the Canadiens 6-2. 
1948 Communists seized power in Czechoslovakia. 
1956 Soviet leader Nikita Khrushchev criticized the late 
 Josef Stalin in a speech before a Communist Party congress 
 in Moscow. 
1972 Germany gave a $5 million ransom to Arab terrorist
  who had hijacked a jumbo jet. 
1986 Filippino President Ferdinand E. Marcos fled the 
 Philippines after 20 years of rule after a tainted 
 election. 
1999 William King was sentenced to death for the racial 
 murder of James Byrd Jr in Jasper, TX. Two other men 
 charged were later convicted for their involvement. 
2000 In Albany, NY, a jury acquitted four New York City 
 police officers of second-degree murder and lesser charges 
 in the February 1999 shooting death of Amadou Diallo. 
2005 Dennis Rader was arrested for the BTK serial killings 
 in Wichita, KS. He later pleaded guilty and was sentenced 
 to 10 life prison terms.
2015  smiled.


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Weatherbug 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Tuesday, February 24

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a Floriduh
school counsellor, who assaulted a teacher in a gym
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
2008 Cuba's parliament named Raul Castro president. His brother 
 Fidel had ruled for nearly 50 years.
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
--- Mark Twain (1835 - 1910) ______________________________________________________ Little Johnny wasn't a very good at speller. One day, during a spelling exam, the teacher wrote the word "new" on the blackboard. "Now," she asked Johnny, "what word would we have if we placed a "K" in the front?" After thinking a few seconds, Johnny said, "Canoe?" ______________________________________________________ A flight attendant on a United Air Lines cross-country flight nervously announced: about 30 minutes outbound from LA, "I don't know how this happened, but we have 103 passengers aboard and only 40 dinners." When the passengers' muttering had died down, she continued, "Anyone who is kind enough to give up his meal so someone else can eat will receive free drinks for the length of the flight." Her next announcement came an hour later. "If anyone wants to change his mind, we still have 29 dinners available, but we are now completely out of booze." ______________________________________________________ Click through for the big picture
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Travis Mims, 27, Holly Hill Florida Woman was slammed to floor by 6' 2", 260-pound school advisor Video of the assault A hulking school advisor was arrested yesterday for aggravated battery after he slammed a female teacher to the ground head-first during a pick-up basketball game, an assault that was recorded by a surveillance camera in the Florida elementary school’s gymnasium. During a two-on-two game Tuesday evening at Holly Hill School, Travis Mims, 27, assaulted Katherine Martin, a 33-year-old special education teacher, police allege. Mims, who is 6’ 2” and weighs 260 pounds, “picked up Ms. Martin’s body, turned her upside down, and maliciously threw her body onto the floor,” according to a charging affidavit that neatly summarizes what is seen on the above video released by police. Martin, who was teamed up with a student, was playing against Mims and another pupil. Martin told cops that during the game Mims was becoming increasingly aggressive, and that “there was an exchange of words between” her and Mims “concerning fouling.” “Then all of a sudden Mims violently picked up Ms. Martin by her waist, turned her body around, and slammed her head-first to the ground,” reported cops, who added that the teacher’s “head struck the ground first, then other parts of her body and sustained injury.” Martin subsequently drove herself to the hospital for treatment of injuries that police described as “substantial” and “serious and permanent.” During police questioning yesterday, Mims said that Martin kept complaining that he was fouling her, adding that she “pushed his face with her hands.” While Mims “admitted he picked up Ms. Martin and slammed her body onto the ground,” he “stated he was not angry at her but did not like when Ms. Martin pushed his face with her hands.” The video shows that Ms Martin was definitely retreating and trying to get away from Mims, who, on the video, clearly seems to have been persecuting and chasing her, instead of playing basketball. It took several adults to get Mims away from here, after she lay injured on the floor. Mims, whose occupation is listed by cops as “campus advisor,” was arrested last night on a felony battery charge and booked into the Volusia County jail, where the above mug shot was taken. He was later released after posting $2500 bond. The school fired Mims after talking to witnesses and watching the surveillance video. 4
______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Cleta Re: WeatherBug Dear Webby, I had to have my computer worked on. since I got it back it does not have the weather bug on my task bar. It always showed the right temp on the task bar. When we were going to get different weather ( like snow or rain or high winds) the bug on my task bar would change color. I do hope you can help me get my weather bug back on my task bar. Thanks Cleta Dear Cleta That weather bug is considered a security problem. Just like the cute round clock gadget, it in itself is not a problem, but it can facilitate bad stuff sneaking in. That is probably why the computer repair place dumped it. Also, some anti-malware programs consider it bad news. However, if you insist on it, it is at http://weather.weatherbug.com/weatherbug-apps.html When using stuff like that, it is that much more important to frequently check for malware with MalwareBytes, not just McAfee. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Sweet Cornbread http://www.thriftyfun.com/Sweet-Cornbread.html ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
_____________________________________________________ A teacher cautiously approaches the subject of s*x education with her fourth grade class because she realizes Little Johnny's propensity for sexual innuendo. But Johnny remains attentive throughout the entire lecture. Finally, towards the end of the lesson, the teacher asks for examples of s*x education from the class. One little boy raises his hand, "I saw a bird in her nest with some eggs." "Very good, William," cooed the teacher. "My mommy had a baby," said little Esther. "Oh, that's nice," replied the teacher. Finally, little Johnny raises his hand. With much fear and trepidation, the teacher calls on him. "I was watchin' TV yesterday, and I saw the Lone Ranger. He was surrounded by hundreds and hundreds of Indians. And they all attacked at one time. And he killed every one of them with his two guns." The teacher was relieved but puzzled, "And what does that have to do with sex education, Johnny?" It'll teach them Indians not to f*ck with the Lone Ranger."
Incredible Scrap Metal Animal Sculptures

Today in 
1803 The U.S. Supreme Court ruled itself to be the final 
 interpreter of all constitutional issues. 
1839 Mr. William S. Otis received a patent for the steam shovel. 
1868 The U.S. House of Representatives impeached President 
 Andrew Johnson due to his attempt to dismiss Secretary of War 
 Edwin M. Stanton. The U.S. Senate later acquitted Johnson. 
1886 Thomas Edison and Mina Miller were married. 
1903 In Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, an area was leased to the U.S. 
 for a naval base. 
1925 A thermit was used for the first time. It was used to 
 break up a 250,000-ton ice jam that had clogged the St. Lawrence 
 River near Waddington, NY. 
1938 The first nylon bristle toothbrush was made. It was the first 
 time that nylon yarn had been used commercially. 
1942 The U.S. Government stopped shipments of all 12-gauge shotguns 
 for sporting use for the wartime effort. 
1945 During World War II, the Philippine capital of Manilla, was 
 liberated by U.S. soldiers. 
1946 Juan Peron was elected president of Argentina. 
1956 The city of Cleveland invoked a 1931 law that barred people 
 under the age of 18 from dancing in public without an 
 adult guardian. 
1980 NBC premiered the TV movie "Harper Valley P.T.A." 
1981 Buckingham Palace announced the engagement of Britain's 
 Prince Charles to Lady Diana Spencer. 
1983 A U.S.congressional commission released a report that condemned 
 the internment of Japanese-Americans during World War II. 
1987 An exploding supernova was discovered in the Large Magellanic 
 Cloud galaxy. 
1988 The U.S. Supreme Court overturned a $200,000 award to Rev. 
 Jerry Falwell that had been won against "Hustler" magazine. The 
 ruling expanded legal protections for parody and satire. 
1989 Iran’s Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini sentenced Salman Rushdie 
 to death for his novel "The Satanic Verses". A bounty of one to 
 three-million-dollars was also put on Rushidie's head. 
1989 A United Airlines 747 jet rips open in flight killing 9 people. 
 The flight was from Honolulu to New Zealand. 
1997 The U.S. The Food and Drug Administration named six brands of 
 birth control as safe and effective "morning-after" pills for 
 preventing pregnancy. 
1999 In southeast China, a domestic airliner crashed killing all 
 64 passengers. 
2008 Cuba's parliament named Raul Castro president. His brother 
 Fidel had ruled for nearly 50 years.
2015  smiled.


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Catching mice 
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
NO Sermon here, not for church, just jokes and fun for adults.
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Good Morning, ,

Today is Tuesday, February 24

Enjoy!

Please vote for me at the EzineFinder
Ophelia Dingbatter Thanks for voting for me! Enjoy! Ophelia The teacher was telling the kids about the birds and the bees. She explained that when a man and a woman meet and fall in love, nine months later, the stork usually brings them a little baby from its nest. Little Johnny — at the back of the class — put his hand up and asks the teacher, "Are you sure about the stork, miss? I think you’re getting your birds mixed up.My big sister just got a little baby and she said it came from a black pecker at the beach!"
Did you hear about the man who never worried about his marriage until he moved from New York to California and discovered that he still had the same postman ?
A husband and wife were screwing up a storm. Afterward, the husband headed to the bathroom to clean up. He was halfway down the hall when his 6-year-old son also stepped into the hallway and was shocked to see his old man standing there wearing nothing more than a condom. The boy pointed at his father's penis and asked, "Dad, what are you doing?" The father, not wanting to explain sex or birth control, started with a bullshit story. "Son, I'm trying to catch a mouse." The boy, still in shock, asked, "What are ya gonna do when ya catch it ... screw it?"

A woman was driving along, and her car broke down. She decided to hitchhike to the nearest gas station. A truck driver hauling a load of chickens pulled up. The driver asked, "Hey, little lady, need a lift?" "Yes, my car broke down, and I need a ride to the nearest gas station." The driver replied, "OK, but first you have to fuck me! No fuck, no ride." She said, "I'm sorry, I don't need a ride that badly." So the driver pulled away. All this time, the driver had a parrot on his shoulder. The parrot started saying, "No fuck, no ride! No fuck, no ride!" The driver said, "You had better shut up, bird, or I'm gonna throw you in back with the chickens!" About two miles down the road, the parrot said, "No fuck, no ride!" So the driver slammed on the breaks and threw him in back with the chickens! About 2 more miles further down the road, the driver heard sirens and saw flashing lights, so he pulled over. He got out of the truck and approached the officer. "What's the problem, officer. I wasn't speeding was I?" The officer said, "I wasn't pulling you over for speeding. I just wanted to inform you that you have a parrot throwing chickens out the trailer screaming, "No fuck, no ride! No fuck, no ride!" ===========================================================
Ophelia Dingbatter If you like my work,
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Click to subscribe to the full version! If you want the large, UNcensored version, of the Calendar, send me an email. The Calendar service is available free to all subscribers of the full version, IF you send me an email. I won't send the Calendar mail unless you A) are subscribed to the full version and B) indicate, that you want it. Enjoy! Ophelia
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Envelope p[rinting in Open Office 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Monday, February 23

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to two
Naked Woman Arrested For Roadway Antics
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1574 France began the 5th holy war against the Huguenots 
  (French Protestants)
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
That's the funny thing about havin' a kid. They come with their own set of problems; make everything else you were worried about seem kinda silly. --- Greg Garcia The mind of a bigot is like the pupil of the eye. The more light you shine on it, the more it will contract. --- Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr. (1841 - 1935) ______________________________________________________ A fifth generation farmer has determined that his son will be the first in their family to go to college. So he and the wife save every penny for years and when the big day comes for junior to leave for school, the old man is the proudest he's ever been. After the first semester junior comes home for Christmas break and the old man sits him down for a talk. "Well, boy, you been at school for three months now, I want you to tell me some of that fancy book learnin'." So junior says, "My favorite class is math, pa. Just last week we learned a new formula: Pi r squared." At hearing this the old man screws up his eyes and smacks his forehead, "Dog gone-it! I spent all that money on schooling and all you can tell me is Pi r squared? Why everybody know pie are round...CORNBREADS are squared!" ______________________________________________________ Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all. ______________________________________________________ Click through for the big picture Elk Crossing under highway
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Amy Carter, 31, Orlando, Florida Naked Woman Arrested For Roadway Antics After stripping off her clothes, a Florida woman walked into traffic, where she performed a lewd act before climbing atop a Lexus and jumping and stomping on the occupied vehicle’s roof and hood, cops allege. Amie Carter, 31, “appeared to be under the influence of a unknown substance," according to an Orlando Police Department report detailing her antics Sunday night. "She appeared in an altered mental state, displaying extremely irrational and volatile behavior." Responding to a 911 call about a “reported naked woman climbing on top of cars and walking in traffic,” cops found Carter attempting to mount a vehicle stopped at a traffic light. After officers wrestled an uncooperative Carter out of the roadway, they “secured her in handcuffs and covered her in a blanket.” Sarah Carlson, a passenger in the Lexus, told police that Carter approached the vehicle and “fondled herself in front of the car” before climbing on the auto. Carter then allegedly “started stomping” on the vehicle’s hood, said Carlson, who added that Carter also threw a cell phone at the car behind the Lexus. Carlson’s husband told cops that Carter left dents in his car’s roof and hood, damage he estimated at upwards of $1500. Carter, seen above, was arrested for criminal mischief and exposure of sexual organs. She was booked into the Orange County jail, where she remains locked up in lieu of $1100 bond. According to court records, Carter’s rap sheet includes prior arrests for narcotics possession, theft, resisting arrest, burglary, drunk driving, and possession of drug paraphernalia. 4______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Walter Re: Envelope printing in Open Office Dear Webby, thanks as always for your unfailing help! I installed Open office 4.1.1 on my new Toshiba Windows 8.1 and can't figure out where to click to print an envelope when all the information is inserted after using the 'Insert' and 'Envelope' fields. Also how can I have my return address appear as the default one, as it does in 'Word.' Walter Dear Walter Printing envelopes is rough on laser printers, so the few times a year I need envelopes nowadays, I just write them by hand. However, here is the info re envelope printing: Open Office Envelope printing To make your return address appear as the default, you would normally use a header. Usually headers are more than just a return address and include a logo or picture. You have complete control over that. If necessary, look up "Headers". Good Luck! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Sweet Cornbread http://www.thriftyfun.com/Sweet-Cornbread.html ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
Joe sets Jim up to go on a blind date with a friend of his. But Jim is a little worried about going out with someone he's never seen before. "What do I do if she's ugly and scary?" says Jim, "I'll be stuck with her all night." "Don't worry," Joe says, "just go up to her door and meet her first. If you like what you see, then everything goes as planned. If you don't just shout 'Aaaaaauuuggghhh!' and fake an asthma attack." So that night, Jim knocks at the girl's door and when she comes out he is awe-struck at how beautiful and sexy she is. He's about to speak when the girl suddenly shouts: ..."Aaaaaauuuggghhh!" _____________________________________________________ Breaking Up Is Hard To Do... (especially when you share the same major!) PSYCHOLOGY Girl accuses guy of just using her as a substitute for his Mother. SOCIOLOGY Each claims to have been oppressed in the relationship. ARCHAEOLOGY One tries to bury the past, and accuses the other of trying to dig it up. THEATRE "OH! Life is... ENDED... as we KNOW it!" BIOLOGY "You just wanted to get in my genes!" PHYSICS Both resign themselves to the fact that what goes up must come down. JOURNALISM "Today was the end of an era. Jack, 19, and Jill, 18, called an end to their relationship of 2 weeks..." WOMEN'S STUDIES "HE did it!" BUSINESS Both decide that they're spending way too much money together, and that it's simply cheaper to be single. HISTORY Each party argues the breakup was caused by something the other party did in the past. GEOGRAPHY Both people decide to simply move far away to avoid each other. ANATOMY "I never liked your body anyway." LAW The party of the second part, having allegedly partied with a party of the third part, is hereby given notice by the party of the first part, to henceforth vacate the premises. ECONOMICS One party demands more than the other can supply.
Dental Clinics around the world.

Today in 
1574 France began the 5th holy war against the Huguenots.
1660 Charles XI became the king of Sweden.
1813 The first U.S. raw cotton-to-cloth mill was founded 
 in Waltham, MA.
1820 The Cato Street conspiracy was uncovered.
1836 In San Antonio, TX, the siege of the Alamo began.
1847 Santa Anna was defeated at the Battle of Buena Vista 
 in Mexico by U.S. troops under Gen. Zachary.
1861 U.S. President-elect Abraham Lincoln arrived secretly 
 in Washington to take his office after an assassination 
 attempt in Baltimore.
1861 Texas became the 7th state to secede from the Union.
1870 The state of Mississippi was readmitted to the Union.
1883 Alabama became the first U.S. state to enact an 
 antitrust law.
1886 Charles M. Hall completed his invention of aluminum.
1887 The French/Italian Riviera was hit by an earthquake 
 that killed about 2,000.
1896 The Tootsie Roll was introduced by Leo Hirshfield.
1898 In France, Emile Zola was imprisoned for his letter, 
 "J'accuse," which accused the government of anti-Semitism 
 and wrongly jailing Alfred Dreyfus.
1900 The Battle of Hart's Hill took place in South Africa 
 between the Boers and the British army.
1904 The U.S. acquired control of the Panama Canal Zone 
 for $10 million.
1915 Nevada began enforcing convenient divorce law.
1919 The Fascist Party was formed in Italy by Benito Mussolini.
1927 The Federal Radio Commission began assigning frequencies, 
 hours of operation and power allocations for radio 
 broadcasters. 
1940 Russian troops conquered Lasi Island.
1940 Walt Disney's animated movie "Pinocchio" was released.
1945 The 28th Regiment of the Fifth Marine Division of the 
 U.S. Marines reached the top of Mount Surabachi. 
 A photograph of these Marines raising the American 
 flag was taken.
1954 The first mass vaccination of children against 
 polio began in Pittsburgh, PA.
1963 The 24th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution was 
 ratified. It prohibited poll taxes in federal elections.
1966 The Bitar government in Syria was ended with a 
 military coup.
1970 Guyana became a republic.
1974 The Symbionese Liberation Army demanded $4 million 
 more for the release of Patty Hearst. Hearst had been 
 kidnapped on February 4th.
1980 Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini declared that Iran's 
 new parliament would have to decide the fate of the 
 hostages taken on November 4, 1979, at the U.S. 
 embassy in Tehran.
1991 During the Persian Gulf War, ground forces crossed 
 the border of Saudi Arabia into the country of Iraq. 
 Less than four days later the war was over due to the 
 surrender or withdraw of Iraqi forces.
1993 Gary Coleman won a $1,280,000 lawsuit against 
 his parents.
1998 In central Florida, tornadoes killed 42 people and 
 damaged and/or destroyed about 2,600 homes and businesses.
1999 White supremacist John William King was found guilty 
 of kidnapping and murdering James Byrd Jr. Byrd was dragged 
 behind a truck for two miles on a country road in Texas.
2000 Robby Knievel made a successful motorcycle jump of 200 
 feet over an oncoming train.
2015  smiled.


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Printing envelopes in Open Office 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Sunday, February 22

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to two
boneheads, who Poured Water On Road 
To Hide New Jersey DWI Crash
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1630 Quadequine introduced popcorn to English colonists 
 at their first Thanksgiving dinner.
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Only sick music makes money today. --- Friedrich Nietzsche (1844 - 1900) An intellectual is a person who has discovered something more interesting than sex. --- Aldous Huxley (1894 - 1963) ______________________________________________________ While carpenters were working outside the old house a woman had just bought, she busied myself with indoor cleaning. She had just finished washing the floor when one of the workmen asked to use the bathroom. With dismay she looked from his muddy boots to her newly scrubbed floors. "Just a minute," She said, thinking of a quick solution. "I'll put down some newspapers." "That's all right, lady," he responded. "I'm already house trained." ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Rheta for this one: Hi Webby: Heres one for you ok? A puzzled expression ran riot over Joanne's face. "An ID ten T error? What's that ... in case I need to fix it again??" He gave her a grin... ;-) ... "Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?" "No," replied Joanne. "Write it down," he said, "and I think you'll figure it out." (She wrote...) I D 1 0 T ______________________________________________________ Click through for the big picture
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Brian Byers, 20 Alexander Zambenedetti, 20, Sparta, New Jersey Poured Water On Road To Hide New Jersey DWI Crash A New Jersey man who allegedly crashed while driving drunk is also accused of making an icy patch the road in an attempt to make the accident look as if it were caused by dangerous road conditions. A friend is accused of drunkenly helping with the plan that could have put other motorists at risk, police said. Police in Sparta, New Jersey, arrested Brian Byers, 20, on Saturday, several hours after he allegedly drove through a stop sign and crashed a 2001 black BMW into a guard rail, FoxCt.com reports. After the accident, police said Byers drove the car, which was registered to a family member, to his house about a mile away. Byers allegedly went back to the accident scene with a friend, Alexander Zambenedetti, 20, and two five-gallon buckets filled with water. Police said the duo poured the water over the intersection to create a black ice slick on the road, according to NBC New York. Sparta Police officer C.J. Grauerholz discovered the accident when he saw Byers walking towards a car that was idling in the middle of the road. The officer saw Zambenedetti in the driver's seat without a shirt even though the temperature was 1 degree F. (-17 C) Zambenedetti told the officer his shirt got soaked after he fell down. The officer noted two five-gallon buckets in the car that still had some water in them, NJ.com reports. Investigators said the men intended to report the accident was because of the black ice and not because of Byers' alleged drinking. Police said the ice was so bad the Department of Public Works had to dump a half ton of salt to make the street safe, according to DailyRecord.com. Byers was charged with driving while intoxicated, careless driving, failure to stop at a stop sign, leaving the scene of an accident, failure to report an accident and disorderly conduct for creating a dangerous condition by purposely icing the intersection, police said. Zambenedetti initially denied operating the car even though he was in the driver's seat and the engine was running, according to the New Jersey Herald. Zambenedetti failed a variety of field sobriety tests and got charged with driving while intoxicated, careless driving and failure to wear a seatbelt. The two were released a few hours later to sober adults, and are due in court on Thursday. 4______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Sharon Re: Lost W8 number Dear Webby, I purchased a window 8 in 2013, in 2014 warranty was up, didn't renew....No to long after machine acted up to go to settings to input number, number wasn't where it should have been. contacted HP and they said they could give me number for a price...sorry but I already paid for windows 8 when I purchased machine....Please any help would be appreciated if u can tell me how to fix this problem... updates can not be updated...I will never buy a HP again, this is my 6th computer never had any problem from them... first HP.. Thank you for anything u can help me with... Sharon Dear Sharon Join the club of those, who will never buy from HP ever again. I don't have your number either, quite obviously. You will have to contact Microsoft about that number. Their support is not as useless as HP's. Use Skype to call them, otherwise they will run down your phone battery. Good Luck! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Removing Ink Stains from your Coach Purse This is so very simple. I wish I had figured this out a long time ago. I had 100's of ink stains on the inside of my Coach bags. I had never tried to get them out, until the other day. I had an alcohol swab and began to rub and rub. Eventually all, YES ALL, of the ink marks came out. I couldn't believe it. You will need a lot of alcohol swabs or just buy a bottle of rubbing alcohol and a thin cloth. You have to work at it for a little bit, but it works. Now I'm ready to sell what was once ready to throw out! I'll definitely get more money. By melissa25 [2] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
An old Jewish woman has been invited to help screen a movie for the rating it willl carry. The movie is a remake of a Roman Gladiator-type movie. In the middle of the movie is a scene where the Romans are feeding people to the lions. The little old lady hits the buzzer she's been given, which stops the movie. The attendant comes down to her chair and says, "Yes, ma'am?" "This movie should be rated 'R'," she says, "because those Jews are being fed to the lions!" The attendant says, "Ma'am, those are Christians, not Jews." "Oh..... Ok. Well, start the movie up again." A few minutes later she again presses the buzzer. The attendant comes down to her chair. "Yes ma'am?" She points to the screen. "Those lions over there... they're not eating!" _____________________________________________________ A painter, whitewashing the inner walls of a country outhouse, had the misfortune to fall through the opening and land in the muck at the bottom. He shouted, "Fire! Fire! Fire!" at the top of his lungs. The local fire department responded with alacrity, sirens blaring as they approached the privy. "Where's the fire?" called the chief. "No fire," replied the painter as they pulled him out of the hole. "But if I had yelled about what is down here, would you have rescued me?"
Dental Clinics around the world.

Today in 
1630 Quadequine introduced popcorn to English colonists 
 at their first Thanksgiving dinner.
1819 Spain ceded Florida to the United States.
1855 The U.S. Congress voted to appropriate $200,000 for 
 continuance of the work on the Washington Monument. The 
 next morning the resolution was tabled and it would be 
 21 years before the Congress would vote on funds again. 
 Work was continued by the Know-Nothing Party in charge 
 of the project.
1865 Tennessee adopted a new constitution that abolished 
 slavery.
1879 In Utica, NY, Frank W. Woolworth opened his first 
 5 and 10-cent store.
1885 The Washington Monument was officially dedicated 
 in Washington, DC. It opened to the public in 1889.
1920 The first dog race track to use an imitation rabbit 
 opened in Emeryville, CA.
1994 The U.S. Justice Department charged Aldrich Ames and 
 his wife with selling national secrets to the Soviet Union. 
 Ames was later convicted to life in prison. Ames' wife 
 received a 5-year prison term.
1997 Scottish scientist Ian Wilmut and colleagues announced 
 that an adult sheep had been successfully cloned. Dolly 
 was actually born on July 5, 1996. Dolly was the first 
 mammal to have been successfully cloned from an adult cell.
2015  smiled.


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When Windows saves pictures in the wrong format 



Good Morning, ,
Today is Saturday, February 21

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a
N.J. woman,  Charged after letting teens get drunk in home
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1804 The first self-propelled locomotive on rails was 
 demonstrated in Wales. 
1842 John J. Greenough patented the sewing machine. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-- I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference. --- Robert Frost (1874 - 1963) I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark. --- Dick Gregory (1932 - ) "My girlfriend always laughs during sex, -no matter what she's reading." - Steve Jobs ______________________________________________________ Father: (at hospital looking through glass at newly arrived babies) "Kitchy kitchy koo. Look, she smiled... isn't she adorable?" Friend: "But your kid didn't smile." Father: "I was talking about the nurse." ______________________________________________________ >From Annie At my granddaughter's wedding, the DJ polled the guests to see who had been married longest. It turned out to be my husband and I who had been. The DJ asked us, "What advice would you give to the newly-married couple?" I said, "The three most important words in a marriage are, 'You're probably right.'" Everyone then looked at my husband. He said, "She's probably right." ______________________________________________________ Click through for the big picture
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Tracey-Harding 50 SOUTH BRUNSWICK, N.J. N.J. woman Charged After Letting Teens Drink In Home A New Jersey mom was charged with child endangerment and suspended from her job as a first-grade teacher after an underage drinking party at her home last weekend ended with a drunken teenager being hospitalized. The 15-year-old boy's mother became concerned when she couldn't contact him Friday night, so she called the South Brunswick home where the party was being held, according to police. She spoke with 50-year-old Tracey Harding, who told the woman her son was sleeping, police said. The teen's mother grew more concerned and drove to Harding's home, calling police as she traveled. Responding officers found the 15-year-old semiresponsive and heavily intoxicated and determined several other teens there had also been drinking beer, vodka and other alcoholic beverages. The boy's blood-alcohol level was so high it could have been life threatening had his mother not gone to the home, authorities said. He was treated and released after several hours at the hospital. Authorities said Harding was aware of the teen's dire condition, but no one from the home sought medical assistance. Harding was arrested Saturday night but is free on $2,500 bail. A telephone message left for her Tuesday was not immediately returned. Harding was suspended from her teaching job at an elementary school in nearby Edison Township after school officials learned of her arrest. 4______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Fred Re: Pictures saved in wrong format Dear Webby, Quick question--- When ever I right click and save as--- to a gif- it comes up as save as a bitmap-- Whats up with that??? Im using hot mail. Fred Dear Fred That is a sign that you don't have enough free and unused memory available for Windows to do it properly, so, in order not to completely lose the file, it saves it as a BMP. Running CrapClener or rebooting usually restores enough free memory so that it will again save pictures properly. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Recycled Photophore Solid gel air fresheners usually have a quite nice floral or geometrical pattern under the plastic film you have to pull off. Once it has dried out, instead of throwing it away, open it (you just have to slide anything flat around the top cover), take off the dry gel, and put a LED votive candle inside. Et voilà! A nice little photophore that can even safely go outside. By Catherine [7] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
Sam made an appointment with a urologist, famous for his work in the field of impotence. The doctor examined him and said, "You're in remarkably good condition for a man of 85. Why are you here?" Sam replied, "My friend Max says he has sex twice a week. I can't do that." The doctor shrugged. "Yes you can. You can certainly say you have sex as many times a week as you like." _____________________________________________________ A doctor examined a woman, took the husband aside, and said: "I don't like the looks of your wife at all." "Me either doc." said the husband. "But she's a great cook and really good with the kids."
Pollution in China.

Today in 
1804 The first self-propelled locomotive on rails was 
 demonstrated in Wales. 
1842 John J. Greenough patented the sewing machine. 
1848 The Communist Manifesto was published by Karl Marx and 
 Friedrich Engels. 
1858 The first electric burglar alarm was installed in Boston, MA. 
1878 The first telephone directories issued in the U.S. were distributed to 
 residents in New Haven, CT. It was a single page of only fifty names. 
1916 During World War I, the Battle of Verdun began in France. 
 The battle ended on December 18, 1916 with a French victory 
 over Germany. 
1932 William N. Goodwin patented the camera exposure meter. 
1947 Edwin Land demonstrated the Polaroid Land Camera to the 
 Optical Society of America in New York City. It was the first camera 
 to take, develop and print a picture on photo paper all in about 
 60 seconds. The photos were black and white. The camera went on sale 
 the following year. 
1965 Malcolm X was assassinated in New York City at the age of 39 
 by assassins identified as Black Muslims. 
1973 Israeli fighter planes shot down a Libyan Airlines jet over 
 the Sinai Desert. More than 100 people were killed. 
1975 Former U.S. Attorney General John N. Mitchell and former 
 White House aides H.R. Haldeman and John D. Ehrlichman were 
 sentenced to 2 1/2 to 8 years in prison for their roles in 
 the Watergate cover-up. 
1988 In Baton Rouge, LA, TV evangelist Jimmy Swaggart confessed 
 to his congregation that he was guilty of an unspecified sin. 
 He announced that he was leaving the pulpit temporarily. 
 Swaggart had been linked to an admitted prostitute. 
1989 U.S. President George H.W. Bush called Ayatollah Khomeini's 
 death warrant against "Satanic Verses" author Salman Rushdie 
 "deeply offensive to the norms of civilized behavior." 
1995 Chicago stockbroker Steve Fossett became the first person to 
 fly solo across the Pacific Ocean in a balloon. He landed in 
 Leader, Saskatchewan, Canada. 
2000 David Letterman returned to his Late Night show about five 
 weeks after having an emergency quintuple heart bypass operation. 
2003 David Hasselhoff and his wife Pamela were injured in a 
 motorcycle accident. The accident was caused by a strong gust 
 of wind. Hasselhoff fractured his lower back and broke several 
 ribs. His wife fractured her left ankle and right wrist. 
2015  smiled.


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What to do when there are not enough USB ports 



Good Morning, ,

Today is Friday, February 20
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!


The flight to Europe was OK, even though they managed to
shoehorn a couple of extra rows into the planes. Climbing 
into and out of my window seat was an interesting exercise 
routine. 

In Amsterdam I was sure glad, that Karolyne had specified 
"wheelchair assisted". I don't know what the people, who
designed that place, were smoking, but it is giving dope
a bad name!

Between AN electric cart and a marathon runner pushing a
wheelchair at full galop, they did get me to the connecting 
flight in less than one and a half hours. Boarding had just 
finished, but the door was still open. Don't try that alone!

Zurich was not quite as bad, even though we had landed at an
unplanned destination. They soon found some stairs. Then a bus 
first, then an electric cart and finally a runner pushing two
wheelchairs simultaneously eventually got me to the exit. 
The train station is just across the street and not confusing
once you go down a level.

If you go there, keep in mind that toilets cost 2 Swiss Franks 
or €2 in that train station. Luckily I had remembered that and
had a few Euro coins in my wallet, and even could give some 
to a lady with crossed legs and tears streaming down her face.

I had a few hours to spare there, so I wandered around and
found the Austrian train, that I had to take to Austria, 
sitting there waiting while it was getting cleaned. 
It had free toilets.

I never saw any conductor or any train staff then or later,
other than the janitors. Nobody at all was interested in my 
on-line ticket, that I had printed in Canada.

When the train called "RailJet" took off, it was like 
watching a train on another rail moving. No noise or 
vibration at all, even when it picked up speed and moved
at 240. Quite amazing!
Here is a picture of the suspension:

The "tire" in the middle carries the train, the rest of the
machinery is just for shock absorbing.

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a
Californian who punched himself in face and claimed 
police brutality, but was on video.
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1673 The first recorded wine auction took place in London.
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
First learn the meaning of what you say, and then speak. --- Epictetus (55 AD - 135 AD) Prediction is very difficult, especially about the future. --- Niels Bohr (1885 - 1962) ______________________________________________________ A sixth grade class is doing some spelling drills. The teacher asks Tommy if he can spell 'before.' He stands up and says, "Before, B-E-P-H-O-R." The teacher says, "No, that's wrong. Can anyone else spell before?" Another little boy stands up and says, "Before, B-E-F-O-O-R." Again the teacher says, "No, that's wrong." Then the teacher asks, ", can you spell 'before'?" stands up and says, "Before, B-E-F-O-R-E." "Excellent , now can you use it in a sentence?" says, "That's easy. Two plus two be fore." --------------- If you didn't put your first name into the FIRST NAME slot, when you subscribed, and put "Hotensia Wilton-Chamberlain III" in there, that joke falls kinda flat. When you are ready to correct the FIRST NAME field, let me know. I can fix that in a few seconds. ______________________________________________________ A golfer whose car broke down flagged down a passing bus and got aboard. With his pockets bulging with golf balls he carefully lowered himself onto a seat next to a little old lady. The little old lady kept looking quizzically at him and his bulging pockets. Finally, after many such glances from her he said, "It's golf balls." She loked at him full of pity and compassion and asked: "Does it hurt as bad as tennis elbow?" ______________________________________________________ Click through for the big picture Last rays of sunshine over Hudson Bay
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Aleksander Robin Tomas­zewski, 33, Lucerne, California Man Punches Self In Face, Claims Police Brutality A California man has been found guilty of attempted coercion after falsely claiming police attacked him. Lucerne resident Aleksander Robin Tomas­zewski, 33, was arrested Jan. 9 on charges of stalking and first-degree s exual abuse, the Register Guard reported. During an interview that day, Tomaszewski said detectives assaulted him and said he wanted to press charges. His face was covered in bruises. The suspect didn't count on surveillance video in his jail cell, however, which shows him pounding his own face more than 40 times. When confronted with the video that authorities released to the public Tuesday, Tomaszewski told police he thought the complaint might get him an earlier release, Oregon Live reported. Instead, Tomaszewski will have to settle for both a bruised face and ego. He was found guilty of initiating a false police report last week and was sentenced to 20 days in jail and a $500 fine, the Associated Press reports. 15:39 2/19/2015 4______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Miranda Re: Not enough USB sockets Dear Webby, I don't have enough USB sockets, but always need at least one more. Miranda Dear Miranda If you get a wireless Logitech mouse and Keyboard, then you can use a Logitech "Unifying" USB plug. Actually, you can take care of up to six pieces of hardware with one Logitech USB plug. The alternative is to go to your local Dollar Store and buy a USB hub with 4 or 6 sockets. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Recycled Photophore Solid gel air fresheners usually have a quite nice floral or geometrical pattern under the plastic film you have to pull off. Once it has dried out, instead of throwing it away, open it (you just have to slide anything flat around the top cover), take off the dry gel, and put a LED votive candle inside. Et voilà! A nice little photophore that can even safely go outside. By Catherine [7] ______________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
Sometimes, when I'm in class, I dream that I'm on a tropical island, with a dozen or more scantily clad females beside me, sitting under a huge palm tree, with some soft gentle music being played on some traditional wood instruments of that region, and a cool gentle breeze caressing my tanned body. I do all this while trying to forget I'm in a classroom. Of course, it would be so much easier without everyone yelling at me to keep teaching. _____________________________________________________ (When you re-tell this joke, you'll have to replace Kentucky and Tennesee with the names of states in your area.) On the border of Kentucky and Tennessee there's a small forest. Half of the forest belongs to a Kentucky farmer, while the other half belongs to a Tennessee man. One day, while out for a walk in the woods, the Tennessee man comes across a wolf caught in a trap. He rushes back to his house and calls his Kentucky neighbor. "There's one of your wolves caught in a trap on my side of the forest." "How do you know it's one of *our* wolves?" the Kentucky farmer asked. "Well," the Tennessee man replied, "he's already chewed off three of his legs and he's still trapped."
Old photos tell us so much about the past. They also tell us, sadly, that history repeats itself.

Today in 
1673 The first recorded wine auction took place in London.
1792 U.S. President George Washington signed the Postal 
  Service Act thereby creating the U.S. Post Office.
1809 The U.S. Supreme Court ruled the power of the federal 
  government was greater than that of any individual state.
1839 The U.S. Congress prohibited dueling in the District 
  of Columbia.
1872 Luther Crowell received a patent for a machine that 
  manufactured paper bags.
1872 Silas Noble and J.P. Cooley patented the toothpick 
  manufacturing machine.
1931 The U.S. Congress allowed California to build the 
  Oakland Bay Bridge.
1933 The U.S. House of Representatives completed congressional 
  action on the amendment to repeal Prohibition.
1944 "Big Week" began as U.S. bombers began raiding German 
  aircraft manufacturing centers during World War II.
1962 John Glenn made space history when he orbited the world 
  three times in 4 hours, 55 minutes. He was the first American 
  to orbit the Earth. He was aboard the Friendship 7 
  Mercury capsule.
1965 Ranger 8 crashed on the moon after sending back thousands 
  of pictures of its surface.
1987 A bomb exploded in a computer store in Salt Lake City, UT. 
  The blast was blamed on the Unabomber.
2002 In Reqa Al-Gharbiya, Egypt, a fire raced through a train 
  killing at least 370 people and injuring at least 65.
2003 In West Warwick, RI, 99 people were killed when fire 
  destroyed the nightclub The Station. The fire started with 
  sparks from a pyrotechnic display being used by Great White. 
  Ty Longley, guitarist for Great White, was one of the victims 
  in the fire.
2015  smiled.


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Sending money with credit cards via PayPal 



Good Morning, ,

Today is Tuesday, February 17

Today I get to fly to Europe. 

By supper time on Wednesday I will ring the door bell at 
my dad's place. He will have my favorite supper ready.

From high above the clouds Tuesday night I won't be able 
to send out the Wednesday issue. The Thursday issue will
again be on track and will hopefully have some pictures
from the trip.

Have FUN!


DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a
Texan Drunk Driver, who left his arm behind, 
when he ran away after crashing his car.

Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1933 Blondie Boopadoop married Dagwood Bumstead three years 
 after Chic Young’s popular strip first debuted. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Nobody talks so constantly about God as those who insist that there is no God. --- Heywood Broun (1888 - 1939) You can't have a light without a dark to stick it in. --- Arlo Guthrie (1947 - ) ______________________________________________________ A priest walked into a barber shop in Washington, D.C. After he got his haircut, he asked how much it would be. The barber said, "No charge. I consider it a service to the Lord." The next morning, the barber came to work and there were 12 books and magazines and a thank you note from the priest in front of the door. Later that day, a police officer came in and got his hair cut. He then asked how much it was. The barber said, "No charge. I consider it a service to the community." The next morning, he came to work and there were a dozen donuts and a thank you note from the police officer. Then, a Senator came in and got a haircut. When he was done he asked how much it was. The barber said, "No charge. I consider it a service to the country." The next morning, the barber came to work and there were 12 Senators in front of the door. ______________________________________________________ Georgina likes sitting in the park feeding the pigeons. One day she brought half a loaf of bread that had gone a bit moldy to feed her daily company. Little by little, pinch by pinch, she fed each pigeon with joy. She sat there without being noticed by anyone. Then suddenly a man rained on her parade by telling her that she shouldn't throw away good food on a bunch of pigeons that can find food anywhere, when there are a lot of people starving in Africa. After staring at him for a few seconds, she handed him the last chunk of bread and said: "Since you are so full of hot air and good advice, I'll let you take this to Africa" ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Lillemor for this picture: Click through for the big picture
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Juan-Gutierrez, 23, Corpus Christi, Texas Drunk Driver Left His Arm Behind After drunkenly crashing his car early yesterday, a Texas man fled the totaled vehicle, leaving behind his prosthetic arm, cops say. Juan Gutierrez, 23, was behind the wheel of a 2000 Toyota Camry that was traveling the wrong direction on a state highway in Corpus Christi when he lost control of the vehicle around 2:30 AM, according to police. Gutierrez’s car “drove off the freeway between two overpass bridges and became airborne and dropped down” to a street below. The Toyota subsequently came to a halt after striking a bridge pillar. Police allege that Gutierrez exited the car and fled the accident scene on foot, leaving behind his 27-year-old male passenger, who suffered minor injuries. When officers arrived at the site of the one-car crash, they discovered that Gutierrez also left without his prosthetic right arm (which was found inside the automobile). The arm can be seen in the image that was recorded by a body camera worn by a Corpus Christi Police Department officer. Gutierrez was arrested by cops who spotted “the one armed man walking not far from the scene,” police reported. Pictured in the above mug shot, Gutierrez--who was treated for minor injuries--was charged with drunk driving and booked into the local jail on the misdemeanor count. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Susan Re: Credit Cards at PayPal Dear Webby, I am trying to send some money to a friend. She said PayPal is the easiest way, but I don't have a PayPal account. Can I use PayPal with just a credit card? Thanks Susan Dear Susan Your friend is right. PayPal is by far the easiest way. You CAN stay on the left side and use your credit card, or simply sign up and use your credit card to prove, that you are over 18, and use the credit card or a bank account as a "fall-back", to draw money from, if your PayPal account is lower, than what you need for a purchase. Keep in mind that a fall-back has a higher fee than if you just use the balance, that you have in your account. The lowest fees are PayPal to PayPal money transfers. So set up your account in a minute, put some money into it from your bank account, and then send money from your account to your friend. To send money click on SEND MONEY enter the amount and your friend's PayPal address, and your password, click OK, and it is done. After the first time, it is really easy. Well worth spending a minute or two setting it up. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Carry Jewelry in Pill Case When taking a trip or going away from home, I use a pill case to stash my rings, earrings and necklaces. They stay safe and separated! By Donna [190] You can get "Dosettes" with 7 "Day-sticks" for doling out a week's worth of pills at the Dollar store for a dollar. The picture shows one "Day-stick". There are 7 in the little cabinet. If you have an old "Franklin Planner" from the days before the internet, the pill cabinet fits neatly into one, after you toss the paper. Then you can take along just one "Day-stick" with a day's worth of pills and/or jewelry, nicely sorted. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ Heard on the plane: >From the granny in the "Scare North" parka (the stewardess): "They remembered to put the gas cap on today, so we won't be doing the usual circling back to the airport. Which is unfortunate, because they forgot to put the cap on the coffee thermos." And from the pilot during his message: "We are pleased to have some of the best flight attendants in the industry... They will be on the next flight." One time in the 70s when they were still using their drafty see-through DC3 from Whitehorse to Dawson City, Dennis the pilot was in a serious looking conference with the stewardess and then came walking back, looking pointedly at the bright red toolcase on the floor by my feet and asked: "Does anybody by any chance have a 3/4" wrench?" I was on my way to fix a big generator and certainly did have all the wrenches with me. After I handed him a 3/4" wrench, he went back to the stewardess. She handed him a beer. In those days the beer still had crown-caps instead of screw-tops. He grabbed the bottle tighly around the neck with one hand, leveraged the wrench over his thumb and expertly popped the cap. Seems they had forgotten the bottle opener on that trip, and by the time we reached Dawson City, the stewardess got pretty good at opening beer with a wrench.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
>From Connie A woman awoke during the night to find that her husband was not in bed. She put on her robe and went downstairs. He was sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front of him. He appeared to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall. She saw him wipe a tear from his eye and take a sip of his coffee. "What's the matter dear? Why are you down here at this time of night?" she asked. "Do you remember twenty years ago when we were dating, and you were only 16?" he asked. "Yes, I do," she replied. "Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car making love?" "Yes, I remember." Do you remember when he shoved that shotgun in my face and said, "Either you marry my daughter, or spend twenty years in jail?" "Yes, I do," she said. He wiped another tear from his cheek and said, "You know... I would have gotten out of jail today." _____________________________________________________ A man and a woman had been married for ten years and decided to try and have kids. They had not been using birth control for the entire time they had been married, so they thought they may have a problem conceiving. The woman decided to go to the gynecologist and see if the problem was with her. She had been hard of hearing since she s little. The doctor examined her and came in to give her the conclusions. He said, "I'm sorry, but the problem is with you. You have insufficient passion and if you ever have a baby it will be a miracle." The woman was very upset and went home crying. Her husband got home and asked her what was wrong. She said, "The doctor told me I've got a fish up my passage and if I ever have a baby it will be a mackerel."
Some of the resemblances are uncanny!

Today in 
1817 The first gaslit streetlights appeared on the streets 
 of Baltimore, MD. 
1865 Columbia, SC, burned. The Confederates were evacuating 
 and the Union Forces were moving in. 
1876 Julius Wolff was credited with being the first to can 
 sardines. 
1878 In San Francisco, CA, the first large city telephone 
 exchange opened. It had only 18 phones. 
1933 Blondie Boopadoop married Dagwood Bumstead three years 
 after Chic Young’s popular strip first debuted. 
1944 During World War II, the Battle of Eniwetok Atoll began. 
 U.S. forces won the battle on February 22, 1944. 
1947 The Voice of America began broadcasting to the Soviet Union. 
1964 The U.S. Supreme Court ruled that congressional districts 
 within each state had to be approximately equal in population.
1992 In Milwaukee, serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer was sentenced 
 to life in prison. In November of 1994, he was beaten to death 
 in prison. 
1995 Colin Ferguson was convicted of six counts of murder in 
 the December 1993 Long Island Rail Road shootings. He was 
 later sentenced to a minimum of 200 years in prison. 
1996 World chess champion Garry Kasparov beat the IBM 
 supercomputer "Deep Blue" in Philadelphia, PA. 
1997 Pepperdine University announced that Kenneth Starr was 
 leaving the Whitewater probe to take a full-time job at 
 the school. Starr reversed the announcement four days later. 
2005 U.S. President George W. Bush named John Negroponte as 
 the first national intelligence director.
2015  smiled.


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Restore lost Recycle Bin icon 



Good Morning, ,

Today is Monday, February 16

Thank You Francis!

Tomorrow I get to fly to Europe. My long time friend Karolyn
moved to the US a few years ago, and still had Canadian Air 
Miles. She has now used them to buy me a ticket to go visit 
my dad.

Tomorrow noon I take off for Calgary, and at 3 from there
to Amsterdam, and after a one hour stop there to Zurich,
Switzerland. From there I take a train and head to Austria.

By supper time on Wednesday I will ring the door bell at 
my dad's place. He will have my favorite supper ready.

From high above the clouds Tuesday night I won't be able 
to send out the Wednesday issue. The Thursday issue will
again be on track and will hopefully have some pictures
from the trip.

The Tuesday issue will still be from here, sent out tonight.
Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a
Texan, who got a life sentence for his 10th DUI
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1946 The first commercially designed helicopter was tested 
 in Connecticut. 
1958 The first ironing board was patented by William 
 Vandenburg and James Harvey. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
On my income tax 1040 it says 'Check this box if you are blind.' I wanted to put a check mark about three inches away. --- Tom Lehrer (1928 - ) The follies which a man regrets most, in his life, are those which he didn't commit when he had the opportunity. --- Helen Rowland (1876 - 1950) ______________________________________________________ Bubba and Bobby Joe rented a boat and fished in a lake every day. One day they caught 30 fish. Bubba said to Bobby Joe, "Mark this here spot so that we can come back right here again tomorrow." The next day, when they were driving to rent the boat, the Bubba asked Bobby Joe, "Bobby Joe, did you mark that there spot like ah tole ya?" His friend replied, "Shore nuff, I put a big ole 'X' on the bottom of the boat." "You stupid fool! Now, what we gonna do if we don't get that same boat today?!" ______________________________________________________ "May I go swimming, Mommy?" "No, you may not. There are sharks here." "But Daddy's swimming." "He's insured." ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Lillemor for this picture: Click through for the big picture This Columbian Cathedral is called Las Lajas Sanctuary
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Bobby Gene Martin, 64 Montgomery County Texas Life sentence for 10th DUI A Texas man was sentenced to two life sentences Wednesday for drunk driving. If that seems harsh, consider that Bobby Gene Martin, 64, racked up 10 DWI charges between 1981 and 2014, reports the Montgomery County Police Reporter. In the latest incident, Martin crashed his mom's pickup truck on Aug. 2, then reportedly asked a wrecker driver for a ride home so he wouldn't get "another DWI." The driver refused, and responding officers found Martin in water up to his waist in a nearby drainage ditch, the Courier reports. His blood alcohol level was 0.217. Martin then threatened to "kill not only the deputy that arrested him, but also his wife, his children, his mom," Montgomery County Assistant District Attorney Kyle Crowl said. Once at the local jail, Martin kept up the death threats, hurling them, along with racial slurs, at the jailer. The jury took one hour to convict Martin and spent three hours deliberating his sentence after learning of his earlier crimes. As a habitual offender, he faced 25 years to life. After notching his eighth drunk-driving conviction in 1999, Martin was sentenced to 15 years in prison, the Houston Chronicle reports. After being released, he was jailed once again for a year after a 2009 DWI arrest. "It is amazing he hasn't killed anyone yet," said Crowl, who painted this metaphor for the jury: The latest charges were the "icing on a cake that [Martin] had been baking his whole life." Martin's life sentences will be served concurrently; he'll be eligible for parole at age 80. His next DUI won't happen until 2031. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Victoria Re: Lost recycle bin Dear Webby, I lost my Recycle Bin the last time I changed resolution. Apparently Windows squished it out of the viewable part of the desktop, and I can't find it any more. How do I get it back? Victoria Dear Victoria That has always been a very common occurrence with Windows. One way to drag it back in from the dark side is to use Auto-Arrange. Ouch! Yeah, I don't like it either. However, it will usually drag icons in from beyond the visible part of the screen. There is also a possibility, that another icon got parked on top of it. Windows 7 quite cheerfully does that. For example, if you try to drag a folder or program into the recycle bin, instead of hitting the old-fashioned DEL key, then sometimes Windows just parks the icon of that foler or program on top of the Recycle Bin icon, neatly hiding it. Sometimes you can spot that kind of malarkey by looking for shortcut names, that don't look quite right. Then you can drag the covering icon away. If you DID delete the Recycle bin icon, it's easy to get it back. Control Panel Personalize choose the link for “Change Desktop Icons” on the left side Put a checkmark into the box next to the name. Hit APPLY Hit OK That is almost all there is to it. The next step is to FIND it. If you have 1500 shortcut icons on the desktop, that won't be easy. Again, the dreaded Auto-Arrange to the rescue. It will sort the icons alphabetically, and if you have painted a background to look like labelled bookshelf boards or labelled file cabinets, you can quickly drag the icons to a place, that makes sense. Next, right-click the desktop and select: Save Desktop. Sometimes that works, but it is a bit unpredictable. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Easily Remove Coffee Stains From Mugs The other day quite by accident I came across this easy way to get coffee stains out of my cups. Normally I use baking soda and rub the stains out, but it was all gone. The cups also had some lime deposits on them so I thought I'd use vinegar to remove those and found I only had apple cider vinegar. I didn't want to cool my dish water so I heated a cup of apple cider vinegar in the microwave for 2 minutes. I then added it to my dish water and let the cups sit a few minutes and the coffee stains wiped right out with no scrubbing. mug after cleaning By Cory [7] ______________________________________________________ Doug went to the eye doctor for an examination because he was having trouble reading the newspaper. "Now that you're over 40," the doctor told him, "you've developed a condition called 'presbyopia,' in which the lens of your eye can no longer focus as well as it used to." Seeing his worried look, the doctor tried to be upbeat. "Congratulations!" he said. "You're now officially a presbyope!" Doug leaned over and asked seriously, "If that means I'm no longer a Roman Catholic, do I still have to go to Confession?"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
>From Bobbie My wife has not spoken to me in three days. I think it has something to do with what happened on Sunday night when she thought she heard a noise downstairs. She nudged me and whispered, "Wake up, wake up!" "What's the matter?" I asked. "There are burglars in the kitchen. I think they're eating the tuna casserole I made tonight." "That'll teach them!" I replied. _____________________________________________________ A dyslexic man walks into a bra. Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
The Most Amazing Driftwood Sculptures.

Today in 
1741 Benjamin Franklin published America’s second magazine, 
 "The General Magazine and Historical Chronicle". 
1804 A raid was led by Lt. Stephen Decatur to burn the 
 U.S. Navy frigate Philadelphia. The ship had been taken 
 by pirates. 
1857 The National Deaf Mute College was incorporated in 
 Washington, DC. It was the first school in the world for 
 advanced education of the deaf. The school was later 
 renamed Gallaudet College. 
1862 During the U.S. Civil War, about 14,000 Confederate 
 soldiers surrendered to Gen. Ulysses S. Grant at Fort 
 Donelson, TN. 
1868 The Jolly Corks organization, in New York City, changed 
 it name to the Benevolent and Protective Order of Elks (BPOE). 
1914 The first airplane flight between Los Angeles and 
 San Francisco took place. 
1918 Lithuania proclaimed its independence. 
1923 Howard Carter unsealed the burial chamber of Egyptian 
 Pharaoh Tutankhamen. The next day he entered the chamber 
 with several invited guests. He had originally found the 
 tomb on November 4, 1922. 
1932 The first fruit tree patent was issued to James E. 
 Markham for a peach tree which ripens later than other 
 varieties. 
1937 Wallace H. Carothers received a patent for nylon. 
 Carothers was a research chemist for Du Pont. 
1938 The U.S. Federal Crop Insurance program was authorized. 
1945 During World War II, U.S. troops landed on the island of 
 Corregidor in the Philippines. 
1946 The first commercially designed helicopter was tested 
 in Connecticut. 
1958 The first ironing board was patented by William 
 Vandenburg and James Harvey. 
1959 Fidel Castro seized power in Cuba after the overthrow 
 of President Fulgencio Batista. 
1960 The U.S.S. Triton began the first circumnavigation of 
 the globe under water. The trip ended on May 10. 
1968 In the U.S., the first 911 emergency telephone system 
 was inaugurated in Haleyville, AL. 
1970 Joe Frazier began his reign as the undefeated heavyweight 
 world champion when he knocked out Jimmy Ellis in five rounds. 
 He lost the title on January 22, 1973, when he lost for the 
 first time in his professional career to George Foreman. 
1985 "Kojak" returned to network television after an absence 
 of seven years with the CBS-TV special, "Kojak: The Belarus File." 
1987 John Demjanjuk went on trial in Jerusalem. He was accused 
 of being "Ivan the Terrible", a guard at the Treblinka 
 concentration camp. He was convicted, but the Israeli 
 Supreme Court overturned the ruling. 
1989 Investigators in Lockerbie, Scotland, announced that a 
 bomb hidden inside a radio-cassette player was the reason 
 that Pan Am Flight 103 was brought down the previous December. 
 All 259 people aboard and 11 on the ground were killed. 
1999 A bomb exploded at the government headquarters in 
 Uzbekistan. Gunfire followed the incident. The event 
 apparently was an attempt on the life of President Islam 
 Karimov. 
1999 Kurds seized embassies and held hostages across Europe 
 following Turkey's arrest of Kurdish rebel leader 
 Abdullah Ocalan. 
1999 Testimony began in the Jasper, TX, trial of John William 
 King. He was charged with murder in the gruesome dragging 
 death of James Byrd Jr. King was later convicted and 
 sentenced to death. 
2002 The operator of a crematory in Noble, GA, was arrested 
 after dozens of corpses were found stacked in storage sheds 
 and scattered around in the surrounding woods. 
2005 The Kyoto global warming pact went into effect in 140 
 nations. 
2015  smiled.


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Logitech mouse button assignment 



Good Morning, ,

Today is Thursday, February 12

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a
Man With "Clockwork Orange" forehead tattoo again in jail

Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1870 In the Utah Territory, women gained the right to vote. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
According to a recent survey, 12 percent of Americans say that it's fine to cheat a little on your taxes. While the other 88 percent know not to talk to a guy with a clipboard asking them if they cheat on their taxes. --- Jimmy Fallon ______________________________________________________ During jury selection for one trial, the judge asked potential Juror No. 12 if there was any reason he could not be a fair and impartial juror. "There may be," he replied. "Juror No. 1 is my ex-wife, and if we were on the same jury, I guarantee we would not be able to agree on anything." Both were excused. ______________________________________________________ A nursery school teacher was telling her class about patriotism. "We live in a great country," she said. "One of the things we should be happy is that, in this country, we are all free." One little boy came walking up to her from the back of the room. He stood with his hands on his hips and said "I'm not free!" Taken aback by the boy's positive attitude, she said, "well, at your age I will admit that you are not allowed to do anything you want, but what I meant is that your family can do anything that is legal. Now, do you understand that you are free?" "No -- I'm NOT free," he said looking up defiantly, "I'm four!" ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Lillemor for this picture: Click through for the big picture Colosseum in snow
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Edwin James Ross 33 Eugene Oregon Man With "Clockwork Orange" Forehead Tattoo Again in jail Edwin James Ross, a 33-year-old Oregonian was arrested Monday evening in Eugene for trespassing and booked into the Lane County jail on the misdemeanor charge. Ross, who was released from custody yesterday, is familiar with the lockup. He was first held there in 2003 following his arrest for murdering a 19-year-old friend with a shotgun blast to the head. Ross subsequently pleaded guilty to second-degree manslaughter and was sentenced to nine years in state prison. His most recent stay at the lockup was last June following a bust for domestic violence, reckless burning, and other charges. It is unclear whether the felon is a fan of the Anthony Burgess novella, Stanley Kubrick’s film adaptation, or ultraviolence in general. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Samantha Re: New mouse won't copy / paste Dear Webby, I got a new mouse, a Logitech this time because their batteries apparently last longer. However, even though it has the side buttons for copy an d paste, they don't work. Is there a way to fix that, or should I bring it back to the store? Samantha Dear Samantha Browse to http://support.logitech.com/en_ca/software/options Instead of en_ca you might have to use en_us. In there download Logitech Options That is the required driver. For some silly reason they have a pissing contest with Microsoft, and the driver is not downloaded automatically. Just go to that link, download and intstall the driver, and then finanlly go into the mouse settings on Control Panel. Now you can assign whatever you want to any of the buttons. However, the number of liness to scroll per click of the mouse wheel, does not work in W7, that seems to be stuck at 4 lines maximum. The rest works fine. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Moving Canned Goods to New Home When I get ready to move to a new home, I buy myself two large trash cans with wheels. Seems like every new home needs new ones anyway. Then, when I go through my food - canned goods, glass jars of food that sometimes break, and even my canisters since they are heavy - and store all my food stuff in the new trash cans. The trash cans can hold a great deal of weight and they are easy to move with the wheels. And if anything breaks, the cans are water proof. I just roll the cans right up on the moving truck and away I go. Works great. By Kimberly [8] ______________________________________________________ The Father, passing through the son's college town late one night on a business trip, thought he would pay a surprise visit to the boy. Arriving at the fraternity house, he knocked on the door. After several minutes of knocking, a sleepy voice drifted down from a second floor window. "Whattya want?" "Does Jimmy Duncan live here?" asked the father. "Yeah!", replied the voice. "Just dump him on the front porch as usual. We'll try to sober him up in the morning."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
"I'm prescribing these pills for you," said the doctor to the overweight patient, who tipped the scales at about three hundred pounds. "I don't want you to swallow them. Just spill them on the floor twice a day and pick them up, one at a time." _____________________________________________________ A mother was teaching her four-year-old The Lord's Prayer. For several evenings at bedtime, the child repeated it after the mother. Then one night the child was ready to solo. The mother listened with pride to the carefully enunciated words, right up to the end. "And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us some e-mail."
Oriental art, painting on water.

Today in 
1541 The city of Santiago, Chile was founded. 
1554 Lady Jane Grey was beheaded after being charged with 
 treason. She had claimed the throne of England for only 
 nine days. 
1733 Savannah, GA, was founded by English colonist James 
 Oglethorpe. 
1870 In the Utah Territory, women gained the right to vote. 
1878 Frederick W. Thayer patented the baseball catcher’s 
 mask. 
1879 The first artificial ice rink opened in North America. 
 It was at Madison Square Garden in New York City, NY. 
1907 A collision of the steamer Larchmont and a schooner 
 resulted in the death of more than 300 people. The incident 
 occurred off New England's Block Island. 
1909 The National Association for the Advancement of Colored 
 People (NAACP) was founded. 
1912 China's boy emperor Hsuan T'ung announced that he was 
 abdicating, ending the Manchu Ch'ing dynasty. Subsequently, 
 the Republic of China was established. 
1918 All theatres in New York City were shut down in an effort 
 to conserve coal. 
1940 Mutual Radio presented the first broadcast of the radio 
 play "The Adventures of Superman." 
1971 James Cash (J.C.) Penney died at the age of 95. The 
 company closed for business for one-half day as a memorial 
 to the company's founder. 
1973 The State of Ohio went metric, becoming the first in 
 the U.S. to post metric distance signs. 
1973 American prisoners of war were released for the first 
 time during the Vietnam conflict. 
1993 In Liverpool, England, a 2-year-old boy, James Bulger, 
 was lured away from his mother at a shopping mall and 
 beaten to death. Two ten-year-old boys were responsible. 
1998 A U.S. federal judge declared that the presidential 
 line-item veto was unconstitutional. 
1999 U.S. President Clinton was acquitted by the U.S. Senate 
 on two impeachment articles. The charges were perjury and 
 obstruction of justice. 
2001 The space probe NEAR landed on the asteroid Eros. It 
 was the first time that any craft had landed on a small space rock. 
2002 Kenneth Lay, former Enron CEO, exercised his constitutional 
 rights and refused to testify to the U.S. Congress about the 
 collapse of Enron. 
2002 Pakistan charged three men in connection with the kidnapping 
 of Wall Street Journal reporter Daniel Pearl in Karachi. 
2002 Princess Stephanie of Monaco and Franco Knie won a 
 defamation-of-character lawsuit against the Swiss magazine 
 "Facts." The case involved a photomontage created by the 
 magazine. 
2003 The U.N. nuclear agency declared North Korea in violation 
 of international treaties. The complaint was sent to the 
 Security Council. 
2004 Mattel announced that "Barbie" and "Ken" were breaking up.
2013 North Korea conducted its third underground nuclear test. 
2015  smiled.


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Animated cats postcards 



Good Morning, ,

Today is Wednesday, February 11

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a
PA man caughtr stealing money left behind at a 
bank drive-through terminal.
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1937 General Motors agreed to recognize the United Automobile 
 Workers Union, which ended the current sit-down strike 
 against them. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
All general statements are false. --- Socratex An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field. --- Niels Bohr (1885 - 1962) ______________________________________________________ Ole lived across River from Clarence who he didn't like at all. They all the time were yelling across the river at each other. Ole would yell to Clarence, "If I had a vay to cross dis river, I'd come over dere an beat you up good, yeah sure ya betcha by golly!" This went on for years. Finally the state built a bridge across the river right there by their houses. Ole's wife, Lena, says, "Now is you chance, Ole, vhy don't you go over dere and beat up dat Clarence like you said you voud?" Ole says, "OK, by yimmy I tink I vill do yust dat" Ole started for the bridge but he sees a sign on the bridge an he stops to read it, then he turns around and comes back home. Lena asked, "vhy did you come back?" Ole said, "Lena, I tink I change my mind 'bout beatin' up dat Clarence, you know, dey put a sign on da bridge dat says "Clarence is 13 ft. 6 in." You know, he don't look near dat big vhen I yell at him from across da river" ______________________________________________________ >From Annette The Federal Government just announced Medicare Part G! Enrollment is OPEN thru the 30th. Sign up immediately! Medicare, Part G - Nursing Home Plan If you're an older senior citizen and can no longer take care of yourself. The government says there's no Nursing Home care available for you. So, what do you do? You opt for Part G…. Our plan gives anyone 65 years or older a gun (Part G) and four bullets. You are allowed to shoot four politicians. This means, of course, that you'll be sent to prison where you'll receive three meals a day, a roof over your head, central heating & air conditioning, cable TV, library, and all the Health Care you need. Need new teeth? No problem. Need glasses? That's great. Need a hearing aid, new hip, knees, kidney, lungs, sex change, or heart? They're all covered. As an added bonus, your kids can come and visit you at least as often as they do now! And, who will be paying for all of this? The same government that just told you they can't afford for you to go into a home. And....you can get rid of 4 useless politicians while you're at it. And now, because you're a prisoner, you don't have to pay any more income taxes. Is this a great country or what? Now that we've solved your senior financial planning, enjoy your week. Blue/Cross of Alabama will be offering a supplementary plan that will cover the cost of 4 more bullets if desired. ---------- Can I use my 105mm (4.1") M-40 ? Or would that be too greedy ? ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Roy for this picture: Click through for the big picture The fog hills of Sausalito
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Randy Gillen, 28 CLEARFIELD, Pennsylvania Stole $500 Left At Drive-Thru Bank Window Police say a Pennsylvania man hoping to pass a fraudulent check instead stole $500 when he found that much money left behind by another customer at a drive-thru bank window. Twenty-eight-year-old Randy Gillen Jr. was in the Clearfield County Jail on Monday, awaiting a Feb. 11 preliminary hearing. Police tell WJAC-TV that the Clearfield man hoped to cash a bogus $1,900 check at CNB Bank, but instead drove away with the money left behind in the carrier tube from the previous customer on Jan. 29. Police say Gillen later tried to pass the bad check at another bank, and was rebuffed before Clearfield police found him last Wednesday, hiding in his girlfriend's closet. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Lisa Re: Animated cats postcards Dear Webby, On my last computer I used to have a bookmark to a site with a whole lot of funny animated postys with cats. Do you know the URL of that site? I think it's one of your clients. Muchly appreciated! Lisa Dear Lisa Sure I know that site. Jana's site has been a favorite for sending postys to cat lovers for many years. Her famous animation of the cat unrolling the toilet paper is a classic. Have a look at http://actioncat.com Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Removing Tissue From Laundry Much as we all try, sometimes we leave a tissue in a pocket of our pants and wash them. Then, the clothes will be covered in lint. There's no need to rewash the load, just put a fabric softener sheet in the dryer and tumble for a while. I don't even use a whole one, because I cut them in thirds. Most of the lint will wind up in your lint trap. I don't use dryer sheets as a rule, because I don't like the toxins they release, but I consider this an emergency, and like I said, I cut them in thirds anyway. By J-Kat [6] ______________________________________________________ A Columbia lawyer was well into a lengthy cross-examination of a witness, stopped and said: "Your honor, a juror is asleep." The Judge ruled: "You put him to sleep; YOU wake him up."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
Two Roofers, Bob and Dan, were putting a new roof on a barn when a bundle of shingles slid down the slope and knocked the ladder over. Bob and Dan decided since it was early they would continue working because someone would surely come around by quitting time. It was nearing 5 PM and they hadn't seen hide nor hair of anyone. So, they walked around the roof a few times and finally decided there was only one way down. On the West side of the barn was a big manure pile. Bob says, "It's the only way down. I will go first." Bob jumped. Dan heard the squishy landing and yelled, "Hey Bob! How deep did you go?" Bob yells back, "I went to my ankles Dan, come on JUMP!" Dan jumps and goes clear up to his neck in manure. He says to Bob, "I thought when you jumped you went up to your ankles?" Bob replies, "I did, but I landed head first!" _____________________________________________________ A man who had just undergone a very complicated operation kept complaining about a bump on his head and a terrible headache. Since his operation had been an intestinal one, there was no earthly reason why he should be complaining of a headache. Finally his nurse, fearing that the man might be suffering from some post-operative shock, spoke to the doctor about it. The doctor assured the nurse, "Don't worry about a thing. He really does have a bump on his head. About halfway through the operation we ran out of gas and the anesthetic nurse had to bean him with a fire extinguisher."
Only one word to describe this….incredible!

Today in 
1752 The Pennsylvania Hospital opened as the very first 
 hospital in America. 
1808 Judge Jesse Fell experimented by burning anthracite 
 coal to keep his house warm. He successfully showed how 
 clean the coal burned and how cheaply it could be used 
 as a heating fuel. 
1812 The term "gerrymandering" had its beginning when the 
 governor of Massachusetts, Elbridge Gerry, signed a 
 redistricting law that favored his party. 
1858 A French girl, Bernadette Soubirous, claimed to have 
 seen a vision of the Virgin Mary near Lourdes. 
1929 The Lateran Treaty was signed. Italy now recognized 
 the independence and sovereignty of Vatican City. 
1936 Pumping began the process to build San Francisco's 
 Treasure Island. 
1937 General Motors agreed to recognize the United Automobile 
 Workers Union, which ended the current sit-down strike 
 against them. 
1943 General Dwight David Eisenhower was selected to command 
 the allied armies in Europe. 
1960 Jack Paar walked off while live on the air on the 
 "Tonight Show" with four minutes left. He did this in response 
 to censors cutting out a joke from the show the night before. 
1979 Nine days after the Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini returned to 
 Iran (after 15 years in exile) power was seized by his followers. 
1982 France nationalized five groups of major industries and 39 banks. 
1984 The tenth Space Shuttle mission returned to Earth safely. 
1990 Nelson Mandela was freed after 27 years in captivity. 
1990 In Tokyo, Japan, James "Buster" Douglas knocked out Mike Tyson 
 in the tenth round to win the heavyweight championship. 
2000 The space shuttle Endeavor took off. The mission was to gather 
 information for the most detailed map of the earth ever made. 
2000 Great Britain suspended self-rule in Northern Ireland after 
 the Irish Republican Army (IRA) failed to begin decommissioning 
 (disarming) by a February deadline. 
2006 In Texas, U.S. Vice President Dick Cheney accidentally shot 
 and wounded a companion during a quail hunt. 
2015  smiled.


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Useless Outlook error message 



Good Morning, ,

Today is Tuesday, February 10

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a

Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1763 The Treaty of Paris ended the French and Indian War. 
 In the treaty France ceded Canada to England. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
It is easier to fight for one's principles than to live up to them. --- Alfred Adler (1870 - 1937) ______________________________________________________ A minister was rather long-winded. During his sermon a young wife in the congregation remembered that she had left the Sunday dinner in the gas range without regulating the flame. She hastily wrote a note and slipped it to her husband, who was an usher. He, thinking it was for the minister, calmly walked up and laid it on the pulpit. The minister paused, took the note with a smile, which turned into a terrific frown as he read: "Please hurry home and shut off the gas." ______________________________________________________ A young woman enters the convent. One of her first duties is to drive the Mother Superior to the local Diocese. Needless to say the young nun is a little apprehensive about getting such an important job to do right off the bat. So the two of them set off down the highway, the young nun driving and the Mother Superior sitting quietly in the back. No sooner do they start this journey when out of nowhere this red object drops out of the sky and lands on the hood of their car! Low and behold, it's the Devil himself! He crawls up to the window and starts making lewd gestures at the young nun. The young nun looks back at the Mother Superior and says, "Mother Superior! The Devil's on the hood of the car! What should I do?" The Mother Superior says in a calm voice, "My child... you are a nun! Show him your cross!" With that the young nun rolls down the window, leans her head out and screams: "YOU @#$%$#@& &@%$# GET THE @#$#@% OFF THE @#$@$#% CAR!" ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Roy for this picture: Click through for the big picture Mt Fuji
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Anneliese Young, 82, Augusta Georgia Georgia Woman, 82, Arrested For Theft Of "Sexiest Fantasies" Body Spray An 82-year-old woman is facing a larceny charge after she was caught trying to steal a bottle of “Sexiest Fantasies” body spray from a CVS pharmacy near her Georgia home, police report. Anneliese Young, the accused octogenarian, was collared when a store worker spotted her placing the item inside her purse. Young then walked out of the Augusta business without paying for the $7.39 body spray, according to a police report. Young, pictured in the above mug shot, was confronted by a pharmacy employee outide the store on January 27. While the apologetic pensioner copped to the theft and handed over the “Sexiest Fantasies” spray, Richmond County Sheriff’s Office deputies were summoned to the store. Young was arrested after a CVS employee “advised that she did wish to prosecute.” Pictured in the above mug shot, Young was arrested and briefly booked into the county jail. The “Sexiest Fantasies” body spray that Young sought to pinch was the brand’s “Fireworks” fragrance. According to the manufacturer, the spray “provides a burst of sensuality as plump wild strawberries, succulent peaches, and voluptuous vanilla come together to create a fragrance as addictive and seductive as the woman who wears it.” The product is also reportedly “sure to drive any man wild.” ------------- For best results carry a hot pizza, when you show up. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Roland Re: Outlook error message Dear Webby, Outlook.com was not able to complete this request. Microsoft may contact you about any issue This notice shows up every time outlook is opened. Do not recall sending any thing to Outlook. Can you give me a idea on this or how to delete it. Thank you: Roland and Ruth Ann Dear Roland That is reason #934 why I don't use Outlook. Don't expect Microsoft to contact you. They don't seem to know what causes that. A lot of people have that nuisance problem. Some people got rid of that thilly message by cleaning the auto-complete like this: Close Outlook and use the /cleanautocompletecache startup switch. To use, press Windows key + R to open the run command then paste outlook.exe /cleanautocompletecache and hit ENTER. Hopefully that helps! Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Removing Tissue From Laundry Much as we all try, sometimes we leave a tissue in a pocket of our pants and wash them. Then, the clothes will be covered in lint. There's no need to rewash the load, just put a fabric softener sheet in the dryer and tumble for a while. I don't even use a whole one, because I cut them in thirds. Most of the lint will wind up in your lint trap. I don't use dryer sheets as a rule, because I don't like the toxins they release, but I consider this an emergency, and like I said, I cut them in thirds anyway. By J-Kat [6] ______________________________________________________ When Jean arrived for her daughter's parent-teacher conference, the teacher seemed a bit flustered, especially when she started telling her that her little girl didn't always pay attention in class and was sometimes a little flighty. "For example, she'll do the wrong page in the workbook," the teacher explained, "and I've even found her sitting in the wrong desk." "I don't understand that," Jean replied defensively. "Where could she have gotten that?" The teacher went on to reassure her that her daughter was still doing fine in school and was sweet and likeable. Finally, after a pause, she added, "By the way, Mrs. Johnson, our appointment was for tomorrow."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
Two doctors opened an office in a small town and put up a sign reading, "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones, Psychiatry and Proctology." The town council was not too happy with that sign, so the doctors changed it to "Hysterias and Posteriors." This was not acceptable either, so in an effort to satisfy the council, they changed the sign to "Schizoids and Hemorrhoids." No go! Next they tried "Catatonics and High Colonics." Thumbs down again. Then came, "Manic-depressives and Anal-retentives." Still not good enough. How about, "Minds and Behinds." Unacceptable again. So they tried, "Inner Souls and Outer Holes." Still no go. Nor did; "Analysis and Anal Cysts", "Nuts and Butts", "Freaks and Cheeks", or "Loons and Moons" work either. Almost at their wits' end, the doctors finally came up with a title they thought might be acceptable to the council; "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones, Odds and Ends." "APPROVED!" _____________________________________________________ OPEN HOUSE BODY SHAPERS TONING SALON FREE COFFEE & DONUTS
People messing with statues are downright hilarious.

Today in 
1763 The Treaty of Paris ended the French and Indian War. 
 In the treaty France ceded Canada to England. 
1840 Britain's Queen Victoria married Prince Albert of 
 Saxe Coburg-Gotha. 
1846 Members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day 
 Saints began their exodus to the west from Illinois. 
1863 The fire extinguisher was patented by Alanson Crane. 
1870 The YWCA was founded in New York City. 
1879 The electric arc light was used for the first time. 
1925 The first waterless gas storage tank was placed in 
 service in Michigan City, IN. 
1933 The singing telegram was introduced by the Postal 
 Telegraph Company of New York City. 
1935 The Pennsylvania Railroad began passenger service with 
 its electric locomotive. The engine was 79-1/2 feet long 
 and weighed 230 tons. 
1942 The Normandie, the former French liner, capsized in 
 New York Harbor. The day before the ship had caught fire 
 while it was being fitted for the U.S. Navy. 
1962 The Soviet Union exchanged capture American U2 pilot 
 Francis Gary Powers for the Soviet spy Rudolph Ivanovich 
 Abel being held by the U.S. 
1981 The Las Vegas Hilton hotel-casino caught fire. Eight 
 people were killed and 198 were injured. 
1990 South African President F.W. de Klerk announced that 
 black activist Nelson Mandela would be released the next 
 day after 27 years in captivity. 
1992 Mike Tyson was convicted in Indianapolis of raping 
 Desiree Washington, Miss Black American contestant. 
1997 The U.S. Army suspended its top-ranking enlisted soldier, 
 Army Sgt. Major Gene McKinney following allegations of sexual 
 misconduct. McKinney was convicted of obstruction of justice 
 and acquitted of 18 counts alleging sexual harassment of 
 six military women. 
2005 North Korea publicly announced for the first time that 
 it had nuclear arms. The country also rejected attempts 
 to restart disarmament talks in the near future saying that 
 it needed the weapons as protection against an increasingly 
 hostile United States. 
2009 A Russian and an American satellite collide over Siberia. 
2015  smiled.


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Organizing desktop icons 



Good Morning, ,

Today is Monday, February 9

Thank you, Adrien!


Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a
Florida perp, who told cops his job was "Drug Dealer"
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1885 The first Japanese arrived in Hawaii. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
It is the nature of all greatness not to be exact. --- Edmund Burke (1729 - 1797) We are inclined to believe those whom we do not know because they have never deceived us. --- Samuel Johnson (1709 - 1784) ______________________________________________________ Being miserable because of a bad or former relationship just proves that the other person was right about you. ______________________________________________________ A medieval astrologer prophesied to a king that his favorite mistress would soon die. Sure enough, the woman died a short time later. The king was outraged at the astrologer, certain that his prophecy had brought about the woman's death. He summoned the astrologer and commanded him: "Tell me when you will die!" The astrologer realized that the king was planning to kill him immediately, no matter what answer he gave. "I do not know when I will die," he answered finally. "I only know that whenever I die, the king will die a horrible death three days later." ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Roy for this picture: Click through for the big picture Kalyazin
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Robert Phillips, 25 Palm Beach, Floriduh Perp Told Cops His Job Was "Drug Dealer" FEBRUARY 6--Following his arrest on narcotics and weapons charges, Robert Phillips was asked his occupation while being booked by cops in Palm Beach, Florida. “Drug dealer,” replied the 25-year-old Phillips, a seven-time convicted felon whose rap sheep includes gun, cocaine, and aggravated assault convictions for which he has served time in state prison. Collared Tuesday, Phillips was driving a stolen Hyundai when he nearly crashed into an unmarked auto being driven by a detective. When officers in marked vehicles subsequently sought to pull over Phillips, he sped away, according to a Palm Beach Sheriff’s Office report. After a high-speed chase, Phillips ran from his car into an art store, where he collided with a female customer, knocking her to the ground. The collision, investigators reported, caused Phillips to drop a loaded .40 caliber handgun. He was thereafter apprehended as he left the business through a rear entrance. According to deputies, Phillips was carrying 22 grams of heroin and $2316 in cash when taken into custody. The car he was driving contained 5.3 grams of crack cocaine, hypodermic needles, a drug scale, and “a container with a hidden compartment.” While being booked on an array of felony and misdemeanor counts, Phillips was asked his occupation by a deputy, who dutifully recorded “drug dealer” as the suspect’s answer to that question. Phillips is pictured in the above mug shots. Phillips is locked up in the Palm Beach County jail in lieu of $242,000 bail. He received no discount for telling the truth about his line of work. In the old days, the IRS would have gone after him for tax evasion, in addition to the other charges. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Kendra Re: Organizing desktop icons Dear Webby, Is there a way to organize my desktop icons to make it easier to find the ones, that Windows shuffles around and hides? Thanks Kendra Dear Kendra Paint a monitor height set of bookshelves, each about 3/4 inch high and the shelves about 3 inches wide. Paste that onto the left side of a monitor size picture suitable for a background. Now write labels onto the front of the shelves. Use names for the different groups of icons, for example: Tools, Ideas, Family, Friends, Graphics, etc. Put that picture into an easy to find location, then make it your desktop background. Now drag each icon onto the shelf it belongs to. Unlike linux, you can't drag a shelf full of icons to a different location. On Windows the icons are strictly desktop anchored, not background. If you want a different arrangement, jusst paint a new set of shelves and drag the icons onto their new location. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Old Window Panes as Frames I have been using old window panes to put photos in. I'm attaching some for the bathroom and general grandkid pics. Everyone loves them and they were so easy :-) By Pattie [1] ______________________________________________________ The kindergarten class had settled down to its coloring books. Willie came up to the teacher's desk and said, "Miss Francis, I ain't go no crayons." "Willie," Miss Francis said, "you mean, "I don't have any crayons.'You don't have any crayons. We don't have any crayons. They don't have any crayons. Do you see what I'm getting at?" "Not really," Willie said, "What happened to all them crayons that nobody ain't got?"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
When Brian put both feet in his mouth at the same time, he didn't have a leg to stand on. _____________________________________________________ Two little rabbits were running for their lives in front of a pack of wolves. The one in front yelled over his shoulder, "Follow me, I know where there is a place we can hide 'til we outnumber em!" The other yelled back, "Keep running, you fool! I'm your brother!"
Fractals are infinite, possessing infinite beauty.

Today in 
1884 Thomas Edison and Patrick Kenny executed a patent 
 application for a chemical recording stock quotation 
 telegraph (U.S. Pat. 314,115). 
1885 The first Japanese arrived in Hawaii. 
1895 Volley Ball was invented by W.G. Morgan. 
1895 The first college basketball game was played as 
 Minnesota State School of Agriculture defeated the 
 Porkers of Hamline College, 9-3. 
1900 Dwight F. Davis put up a new tennis trophy to go 
 to the winner in matches against England. The trophy 
 was a silver cup that weighed 36 pounds. 
1942 The U.S. Joint Chiefs of Staff held its first formal 
 meeting to coordinate military strategy during World War II. 
1942 Daylight-saving "War Time" went into effect in the U.S. 
1943 During World War II, the battle of Guadalcanal ended 
 with an American victory over Japanese forces. 
1950 U.S. Senator Joseph McCarthy charged that the State 
 Department was riddled with Communists. This was the 
 beginning of "McCarthyism." 
1953 The movie "Superman" premiered. 
1969 The Boeing 747 flew its inaugural flight. 
1971 The San Fernando Valley experienced the Sylmar 
 earthquake that registered 6.4 on the Richter Scale. 
1971 The Apollo 14 spacecraft returned to Earth after 
 mankind's third landing on the moon. 
1975 The Russian Soyuz 17 returned to Earth. 
1997 "The Simpsons" became the longest-running prime-time 
 animated series. "The Flintstones" held the record previously. 
2001 "Hannibal," the sequel to "Silence of the Lambs", 
 opened in theaters.
2015  smiled.


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Accidental unsubscribes 



Good Morning, ,

Today is Sunday, February 8

A surprising number of you responded to say you want 
moon trajectory data. Will do!

The Chinook did a lot of damage to my roof.
I didn't go up yet, just looked from ground level.
Looks expensive!

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to 
Teacher had sex with pupil for four years
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1993 General Motors sued NBC, alleging that "Dateline NBC" 
 had rigged two car-truck crashes to show that some GM pickups 
 were prone to fires after certain types of crashes. The suit 
 was settled the following day by NBC. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there. --- Will Rogers (1879 - 1935) ______________________________________________________ The wife chewed out her husband at the company picnic a while back. "Doesn't it embarrass you that people have seen you go up to the buffet table five times?" "Not a bit," the husband replied. "I just tell them I'm filling up the plate just for you!" ______________________________________________________ Miss Figpot was giving a lesson to her first grade class. "If I had seven oranges in one hand and eight oranges in the other, what would I have?" She asked jumped up and announced to the class, "VERY big hands...!" ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Roy for this picture: Click through for the big picture Statue of King Decebal on the Danube Canyon, Romania/ Serbia border
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Darcy Smith, 41, McMicken Heights, Washington Elementary School Teacher charged with Rape Of 14-Year-Old Student She was supposed to be a good influence and keep him out of harm's way, but now a former regional Teacher of the Year is accused of raping her 14-year-old student. Darcy Smith, 41, is accused of habitually sexually abusing the boy over a period of four years. The Washington state teacher was charged Thursday with three counts of third-degree child rape. The alleged victim, now 19, reported the abuse to the King County Sheriff's Office in May 2014. It all started in September 2008. The student, then 12, broke his collar bone, and lived far away from the hospital where he received treatments. Smith, the boy's sixth grade teacher at McMicken Heights Elementary School, lived closer and offered to have him move in with her family. At the time, the boy's older brother was involved in gangs, and his mother was concerned that her younger son would follow the same dangerous path. She saw Smith as a positive influence, and accepted the teacher's invitation, according to KING. But things soon changed. At first the boy merely confided in Smith, telling her his personal problems, detectives said in court documents. Later, Smith began buying him clothes, and she became progressively more affectionate with him. "Smith would put her hand on his shoulder or massage his back," detectives wrote. "[The] lines started to get blurred." The boy told police he began having sex with Smith about a year after he moved in. Encounters typically took place after Smith's husband and children went to bed, or on her days off from teaching elementary school, according to the Seattle Post-Intelligencer. Smith often drank before their encounters, which occurred two or three times a week, the boy told police. "Smith told him not to say anything and made him promise not to tell," detectives wrote in charging documents filed Thursday. "Smith said she would go to jail and be in big trouble if he told." The pattern of alleged abuse continued until the boy turned 18 and moved out. Court documents suggest that Smith and the boy were still sexually active when she won Teacher of the Year for King and Pierce Counties in 2012, the Post- Intelligencer reported. School officials say they notified the parents of the investigation last week. Smith is scheduled to be arraigned Feb. 12. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Dani Re: Accidental unsubscribe Dear Webby, Can you please subscribe my grampa again? He was laughing so hard about that joke you wrote specially for him with his name in it, that he was pounding the desk and dropping his cup and sneezing and coughing his coffee all over. During all that he somehow hit something that unsubscribed him. He didn't mean to,honestly! And he is quite upset and worried now. Please put him back on. Dani Dear Dani Sure, no problem. There was only one UNsub today, so I know what his name and address are. That reminds me, if any of you see "Friend" as the hero in a joke, then they were too lazy or too shy to put their name or nickname into the subscription form. Just write to me and tell me what your first name or nickname is. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Homemade Dryer Sheets From Washcloths Dip a washcloth in liquid fabric softener, then hang it on a towel rack until dry. When you dry clothes, pop this washcloth in with the load. It can be reused a couple dozen times, then repeat the procedure. A bottle of liquid softener will last almost forever! Just to add to my post shown here from June 2004, I am still using from the same bottle of fabric softener that I was using at that time. It is a 200 ounce bottle of Snuggle that I bought at Sam's in Sept of 2003. I dilute it with equal parts of water, and do about 30 loads before I have to resoak my cloth. By Harlean from Arkansas ______________________________________________________ >From Latreesha "I am very much annoyed to find you have branded my boy as illiterate. This is a dirty lie. I was married to his father a week before he was born."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
A Border Patrol Agent catches a guy that just might be an illegal alien. However he begs and pleads and asks for a chance to stay. The BPA decides to give him a chance and says: "Ok, I'll let you stay if you can use three English words in a sentence". Of course, the man agrees to this. The BPA tells him, "The 3 words are: Green, Pink and Yellow. Now use them in one sentence." The guy thinks really hard for about two minutes, then says, "Hmmm, Ok...... The phone, it went Green, Green, Green, I Pink it up and sez Yellow?" _____________________________________________________ A college professor asked his class a question. "If Philadelphia is 100 miles from New York and Chicago is 1000 miles from Philadelphia and Los Angles is 2000 miles from Chicago, how old am I?" in the back of the class raised a hand and when called upon said "Professor you're 44." The Professor said "You're absolutely correct, but tell me, how did you arrive at the answer so quickly?" said. "You see professor, I have a brother; he's 22, and he's half nuts."
Tiny paradise resorts. I especially like the ones built on bonsai trees.

Today in 
1802 Simon Willard patented the banjo clock. 
1861 The Confederate States of America was formed. 
1861 A Cheyenne delegation and some Arapaho leaders 
 accepted a new settlement (Treaty of Fort Wise) with the 
 U.S. Federal government. The deal ceded most of their land 
 but secured a 600-square mile reservation and annuity 
 payments. 
1900 In South Africa, British troops under Gen. Buller were 
 beaten at Ladysmith. The British fled over the Tugela River. 
1904 The Russo-Japanese War began with Japan attacking Russian 
 forces in Manchuria. 
1952 Queen Elizabeth II ascended to the British throne. Her 
 father, George VI, had died on February 6. 
1963 The Kennedy administration prohibited travel to Cuba 
 and made financial and commercial transactions with Cuba 
 illegal for U.S. citizens. 
1974 The three-man crew of the Skylab space station returned 
 to Earth after 84 days. 
1978 The U.S. Senate deliberations were broadcast on radio for 
 the first time. The subject was the Panama Canal treaties. 
1980 U.S. President Jimmy Carter announced a plan to re-introduce 
 draft registration. 
1985 "The Dukes of Hazzard" ended its 6-1/2 year run on CBS television. 
1993 General Motors sued NBC, alleging that "Dateline NBC" 
 had rigged two car-truck crashes to show that some GM pickups 
 were prone to fires after certain types of crashes. The suit 
 was settled the following day by NBC. 
2015  smiled.


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Libre Boot X-200 



Good Morning, ,

Today is Saturday, February 7

We got a Chinook. Snow is evaporating at a rate of 
about an inch per hour, and heading towards Chicago.

I checked the calendar for the moon position. Not good
for hanging quilts and bedding and winter jackets out
on the line. Feb 14 - 17 will be ideal for that.

The "over" and "under" positions of the moon are not some
kind of superstition, but refer to where the moon travels,
wether it is a high or a low trajectory.
Feb 14 will also be ideal for cleaning windows, bringing 
firewood inside or under a roof.

If you are far enough South to do any planting, Feb 14 is
good for stuff, that you want to grow up and that you 
harvest above ground parts. Good for salad, bad for potatoes. 

February 27 is good for below ground crops like potatoes,
radishes, carrots.

If you are interested in those moon positions, I will 
mention them when they occur.

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to 
a Connecticut mother, who left a 2 week old baby in a 
cold car to enter sex store
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
2000 California's legislature declared that February 13 would 
 be "Charels M. Schulz Day." 
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
The more I want to get something done, the less I call it work. --- Richard Bach ______________________________________________________ >From Tom The geography lesson was cute. However, you should go to the Lancaster area of Pennsylvania. You can travel from Blue Ball to Bird in Hand to Intercourse to Paradise. Have a great day!! Tom ______________________________________________________ >From Bob I was eating breakfast with my 10-year-old granddaughter and I asked her, "What day is February 16, 2015?" Without skipping a beat she said, "It's Presidents Day!" She's smart, so I asked her, "What does Presidents Day mean?" I waited for something about Obama, Bush or Clinton, etc. She replied, "Presidents Day is when the President steps out of the White House, and if he sees his shadow, we have another year of Bull Shit." You know, it hurts when hot coffee spurts out your nose ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Roy for this picture: Click through for the big picture Chateau de Chillon, Switzerland
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Tiffany Lovejoy 28, Akron, Ohio Left Baby In Frigid Car To Enter Sex Store A woman in Waterbury, Connecticut, is behind bars after police discovered her two-week-old baby in a freezing car clad only in a onesie. The car was parked outside of the VIP -- short for Very Intimate Pleasures -- an adult novelties store in Southington. Lindsay Hoffmann, 26, entered the store Wednesday night with her infant and with Marquette Riggsbee, 54 and her infant. Store employees turned them away, however, because children weren't allowed inside, the Associated Press reports. Hoffmann and Riggsbee returned a short time later without the newborn. Employees raced outside and immediately called police when they saw the child alone in the vehicle in 29-degree weather. VIP District Manager Tina Marchese told WFSB TV she was shocked at how cavalier Hoffmann and Riggsbee were towards the child. She said they continued to peruse the store after being told the police were coming. "[The baby] was not dressed for winter. He was just in a normal onesie, no hat, hands exposed," Marchese said. "It really affected us because we are all mothers so it was a really sad thing for the baby." The baby boy was taken to a hospital to be evaluated. Although the child's hands and feet were very cold, his body temperature was OK, NBC Connecticut reports. Hoffmann and Riggsbee were charged with risk of injury to a minor and leaving a child unsupervised. They are each held on $25,000 bond pending a court appearance on Thursday. Apparently there is no known father, so the baby is now in the hands of the State's Department of Children and Families, according to 19ActionNews.com. Both suspects have previous criminal records. Hoffman was convicted of prostitution in 2013 and Riggsbee was convicted of resisting arrest the same year. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Enna Re: LibreBoot X200 Dear Webby, What's the story about the Libre boot X200? Techies are enthusiastic about it, especially the Penguins (Linux fanatics), but magazine writers badmouth it quite fiercely. To me it would seem like a good deal, especially the part about totally free software all the way down to the BIOS. What is your opinion? Enna Dear Enna Keep in mind that those magazine writers are used to getting the next season's most powerful game machines and software for bribes, ahem for testing, and are encouraged by their advertising department, to promote the stuff that brings in a few Million bucks in ad money. You have to take them with a grain of salt. They would never promote or have a kind word about software, that does not buy ads in their magazine. The Libre Boot X200 is a refurbished ThinkPad X200 from 2008 with a current WiFi card. Naturally, magazine writers who are currently playing on 2016 Windoze 10 machines with 20 MB RAM will turn their noses up at a 2008 Thinkpad, without ever trying it. The Libre Boot X200 is not handicapped with Windows 10. It runs an optimized, factory installed Trisquel Linux, and probably runs circles around any 2016 Windows 10 machine. All the software installed on it is free, for you, not just for magazine writers, who have never in their life paid for any software. All the office and graphics and music software is pre-installed, and totally free, forever. Not just a free trial period. Free forever. They even went way beyond office and graphics software, right down to the BIOS. In my opinion, that is a bit overkill. Sure, a few, very few, fanatics will want to edit the BIOS, but the great majority won't give a hoot about that. However, should the need arise a few years down the road, to do some security tweak on the BIOS, you can. The biggest appeals are it's speed, and the free forever software. If you have 10 or 100 or 1000 office machines, not having to pay $500 a piece for Microsoft Office and whatever for periodic updates, that can make a huge difference. Just not having to buy Office alone will pay for the whole machine! Windows or Linux is not really an important concern. Employees are paid to work in spreadsheets or word processors or graphics, not to waste time messing with the operating system. Switching from XP or W7 to Linux is no bigger step than switching to W8 or W10. The Libre Boot X200 sells for about $450. If you want to see the specs or order one, go to Libre Boot X200 Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Homemade Dryer Sheets From Washcloths Dip a washcloth in liquid fabric softener, then hang it on a towel rack until dry. When you dry clothes, pop this washcloth in with the load. It can be reused a couple dozen times, then repeat the procedure. A bottle of liquid softener will last almost forever! Just to add to my post shown here from June 2004, I am still using from the same bottle of fabric softener that I was using at that time. It is a 200 ounce bottle of Snuggle that I bought at Sam's in Sept of 2003. I dilute it with equal parts of water, and do about 30 loads before I have to resoak my cloth. By Harlean from Arkansas ______________________________________________________ A farmer stood leaning on a fence at the edge of his property. He watched as a red sports car came over the top of a hill and followed the road up to the spot where he stood. The driver pulled over to the side of the road and called out to the farmer. "Do you know how I can get to Route 91?" the driver asked. The farmer thought for a few seconds. Then he said, "Nope." "Do you know where the nearest turnpike entrance is?" the driver asked. "Nope." "How about the town of Hadley. Do you know which direction it is from here?" "Nope." Exasperated, the driver raced his engine. "You don't know very much, do you?" he said. "Nope," the farmer replied. "But I don't have to. I don't get lost in these parts of the prairie."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
A careful study of economics reveals that the best time to buy anything was last year. _____________________________________________________ Greg complains to a friend, "I can't take it anymore." "What's wrong?" his concerned friend asks. "It's Keli. Every time we have an argument, she gets historical!" "You mean hysterical," his friend said, chuckling. "No, I mean HISTORICAL," Greg insists. "Every argument we have, she'll go "But I still remember that time five years ago when you said...."
Amazing 16th Century six in one books!

Today in 
1882 The last bareknuckle fight for the heavyweight boxing 
 championship took place in Mississippi City. 
1893 Elisha Gray patented a machine called the telautograph. 
 It automatically signed autographs to documents. 
1913 The Turks lost 5,000 men in a battle with the Bulgarian 
 army in Gallipoli. 
1943 The U.S. government announced that shoe rationing would 
 go into effect in two days. 
1944 During World War II, the Germans launched a 
 counteroffensive at Anzio, Italy. 
1962 The U.S. government banned all Cuban imports and re-export 
 of U.S. products to Cuba from other countries. 
1974 The nation of Grenada gained independence from Britain. 
1976 Darryl Sittler (Toronto Maple Leafs) set a National 
 Hockey League (NHL) record when he scored 10 points in a game 
 against the Boston Bruins. He scored six goals and four assists. 
1977 Russia launched Soyuz 24. 
1984 Space shuttle astronauts Bruce McCandless II and Robert L. 
 Stewart made the first untethered space walk. 
1985 "Sports Illustrated" released its annual swimsuit edition. 
 It was the largest regular edition in the magazine’s history 
 at 218 pages. 
1986 Haitian President-for-Life Jean-Claude Duvalier fled his 
 country ending 28 years of family rule. 
1991 The Rev. Jean-Bertrand Aristide was sworn in as Haiti's 
 first democratically elected president. 
1999 King Hussein of Jordan died. His son was sworn in as king 
 four hours after the announcement that his father had died. 
2000 California's legislature declared that February 13 would 
 be "Charels M. Schulz Day." 
2015  smiled.


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Why are 4 TB drives slow? 



Good Morning, ,

Today is Friday, February 6
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!


Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to 
Heroin Users Passed Out In Freezing Car With Toddler Inside
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1952 Britain's King George VI died. His daughter, Elizabeth II, 
 succeeded him.  
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Nothing is so admirable in politics as a short memory. --- John Kenneth Galbraith (1908 - 2006) ______________________________________________________ Geography lesson for today: Climax, NC is south of High Point, NC which has a small settlement to its north called Horneytown, NC. Strange but entirely true! So that puts High Point in between Horneytown and Climax. ______________________________________________________ A doctor told Mrs. Stone to give her husband one pill a day and one small sip of whiskey to improve his stamina. A month later, when Mrs. Stone came in for another visit, the doctor asked, "How are we doing with the pill and the whiskey?" Mrs. Stone answered, "Well, he's a little behind with the pills, but he's about six months ahead with the whiskey." ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Roy for this picture: Click through for the big picture
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Christopher McGarr 25, Tiffany Lovejoy 28, Akron, Ohio Heroin Users Passed Out In Freezing Car With Toddler Inside A man and woman in northeast Ohio have been charged with child endangering after police say the pair passed out from drug use with a toddler in a freezing car. The Northeast Ohio Media Group reports police responded to a call from an Akron gas station employee Tuesday who reported a car had been sitting at a gas pump for an hour and a half. Deputies said they found 25-year-old Christopher McGarr in the driver's seat with a needle in his arm. Police say his son's baby sitter, 28-year-old Tiffany Lovejoy, had also passed out from using heroin. Police say McGarr's 3-year-old son was in the back seat without a car seat. McGarr and Lovejoy are charged with felony child endangering. Court documents list no attorneys for them. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Melody Re: Why are big drives slow? Dear Webby, You mentioned a week vacation while virus scanning a 4 TB drive. Can't you continue working during the can? Melody Dear Melody Yes, you can, if you have lots of patience. Scanning a big drive really slows down the computer, and you tend to stop the scan when your patience runs out, not when the scan is completed. If you have a few smaller dirves, for example the 500 MB drives we use on servers, then you can schedule scans for night time, a different drive every night. That way you won't be inconvenienced during working time, and get complete scans. You could do something similar by partitioning the big drive into virtual drives. That helps with the malware scanning, but regular work is much slower than with separate drives. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Freshening Sheets Between Changes To freshen sheets between changes, I use any brand of room spray that calls itself "Crisp Linen" or "Fresh Linen", even if it's from the dollar stores. I spray it on the fitted sheet and a drop on the pillows. Then I crawl into a bed that always smells like the sheets just came from the line outside. By Melody from East Brunswick, NJ ______________________________________________________ "What do you mean by coming home half drunk?" screamed the angry wife. "It's not my fault. I ran out of money," said Phil.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
One beautiful Sunday morning, a priest announced to his congregation: "My good people, I have here in my hands three sermons... a $100 sermon that lasts five minutes, a $50 sermon that lasts fifteen minutes, a $10 sermon that lasts a full hour, and a coin sermon that lasts till noon. Now, we'll take the collection to see which one you want." _____________________________________________________ The newly-married husband came home from the office to find his young wife in floods of tears. "Darling, what is the matter?" he asks. "Sweetheart," she sobs, "the most terrible thing has happened! I cooked my very first Beef Bourguignon for you, and I got it out the oven to season it, and the phone rang. When I came back from answering the phone an hour later," she sobbed again "I found that the cat had eaten it!" "Don't worry, darling," said her husband. "Don't cry. I'll get you a new cat in the morning..."
Amazing Automatons, Robots & Victorian Androids

Today in 
1778 The United States gained official recognition from 
 France as the two nations signed the Treaty of Amity and 
 Commerce and the Treaty of Alliance against England.
1899 The U.S. Senate ratified a peace treaty between the 
 U.S. and Spain. 
1900 The Holland Senate ratified the 1899 peace conference 
 decree that created in international arbitration court 
 at The Hague. 
1900 U.S. President McKinley appointed W.H. Taft as 
 commissioner to report on the Philippines. 
1911 The first old-age home for pioneers opened in Prescott. 
1926 The National Football League adopted a rule that made 
 players ineligible for competition until their college class 
 graduated. 
1932 Dog sled racing happened for the first time in Olympic 
 competition. 
1952 Britain's King George VI died. His daughter, Elizabeth II, 
 succeeded him. 
1959 The U.S., for the first time, successfully test-fired a 
 Titan intercontinental ballistic missile from Cape Canaveral. 
1971 NASA Astronaut Alan B. Shepard used a six-iron that he 
 had brought inside his spacecraft and swung at three golf 
 balls on the surface of the moon. 
1972 Over 500,000 pieces of irate mail arrived at the mail 
 room of CBS-TV, when word leaked out that an edited-for-TV 
 version of the X-rated movie, "The Demand," would be shown. 
1985 The French mineral water company, Perrier, debuted its 
 first new product in 123 years. The new items were water 
 with a twist of lemon, lime or orange. 
1987 President Ronald Reagan turned 76 years old this day 
 and became the oldest U.S. President in history. 
1998 Washington National Airport was renamed for U.S. President 
 Ronald Reagan with the signing of a bill by U.S. President Clinton. 
1999 King Hussein of Jordan transferred full political power 
 to his oldest son the Crown Prince Abdullah. 
1999 Excerpts of former White House intern Monica Lewinsky's 
 videotaped testimony were shown at President Clinton's 
 impeachment trial. 
1999 Heavy fighting resumed along the common border between 
 Ethiopia and Eritrea. 
2000 Russia's acting President Vladimir Putin announced that 
 Russian forces had captured Grozny, Chechnya. The capital city 
 had been under the control of Chechen rebels. 
2000 In Finland, Foreign Minister Tarja Halonen became the first 
 woman to be elected president. 
2000 U.S. First Lady Hillary Rodham Clinton formally declared 
 that she was a candidate for a staunch Democrat U.S. Senate seat 
 from the state  of New York. 
2001 Ariel Sharon was elected Israeli prime minister. 
2002 A federal judge ordered John Walker Lindh to be held 
 without bail pending trial. Lindh was known as the 
 "American Taliban."
2015  smiled.


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Are 4 TB drives a good deal? 



Good Morning, ,

Today is Thursday, February 5

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to 
Two Of The Country’s Dumbest iPad Thieves
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1783 Sweden recognized the independence of the United States. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Just in terms of allocation of time resources, religion is not very efficient. There's a lot more I could be doing on a Sunday morning. --- Bill Gates (1955 - ) ______________________________________________________ Beniamin and an Italian and an Irishman, all first time fathers, are pacing nervously in a maternity ward waiting room when a nurse rushes out of the delivery room holding up a newborn black baby. "Yours?" she asked the Italian man, who immediately curses her out in Italian and says "No! notta my kid!" "Yours?" The nurse asks the Irishman, who answers "It blodie will betta not be!" "OK, then it must be yours", she informs David, who sheepishly looks at the ground and mumbles "It must be. My wife, everything she burns! ______________________________________________________ Laura fell for her handsome new dentist like a ton of bricks and pretty soon had lured him into a series of passionate encounters in the dental clinic after hours. But one day he said sadly, "Laura, honey, we have to stop seeing each other. Your husband's bound to get suspicious." "No way, sweetie, he's dumb as a post," she assured him. "Besides, we've been doing this for six months now and he doesn't suspect a thing." "True," agreed the dentist, "but you're down to one tooth!" ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Roy for this picture: Click through for the big picture Milky Way
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Dorian Walker-Gaines, 20, Dillian Thompson, 22, Houston, Texas Houston Police Arrest Two Of The Country’s Dumbest iPad Thieves Police have arrested the dopey Texas thieves who stole an iPad and then used the device to take celebratory “selfie” photos that were automatically uploaded to the victim’s iCloud account. Dorian Walker-Gaines, 20, and Dillian Thompson, 22, were busted last night and booked into a Houston jail on felony theft charges. Walker-Gaines is being held on $10,000 bond, while Thompson is locked up in lieu of $5000 bond. Walker-Gaines (left) and Thompson are pictured in the above mug shots. According to a criminal complaint, Walker-Gaines confessed that he and Thompson stole the iPad, $5000 in cash, a laptop, and other items from a vehicle owned by Stewart Schaefer, who left the car unlocked in front of his home earlier this month. Schaefer subsequently discovered that a series of photos had been uploaded to his iCloud account from the stolen device. Those photos showed Walker-Gaines and Thompson inside a Burger King holding fans of $100 bills. The felony complaint notes that after news about the “selfie” photos began circulating online, a Reddit user contacted a friend of Schaefer’s and provided the names and dates of birth of Walker-Gaines and Thompson. In addition to the photos, Walker-Gaines--whom TSG yesterday identified as one of the thieves--even uploaded a video to his Facebook page that showed him holding cash and declaring, “This, my good people, is what we get from a good night’s hustle.” The video, recorded hours after the theft, was shot inside the Burger King, which is two miles from Schaefer's residence. Schaefer estimated that the items stolen from his truck were worth about $9000. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Dan Re: 4 TB drives Dear Webby, I saw that NewEgg advertises 4 TB drives for under $200. That seems awfully tempting, considering that I paid that much for my first 40 MB drive. Is it a good deal? Dan Dear Dan No, it isn't. Are you going to take a week off every time you do a virus scan on that drive? You are probably not going to fill a 1 TB drive. You can get those for $60. Even our big servers use six separate ½ TB or smaller drives for better speed. Finding a file on a 4 TB drive takes a lot longer than finding it on a ½ TB drive. 4 TB drives make sense only for archiving data, if you want to keep weekly or daily versions to be able to backtrack and find mistakes. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Old Washer Tub for Bonfires Warning: Do not do this unless the tub is stainless steel. A feedback was shared by a user about someone trying this with a porcelain tub and it exploded and caused serious injury. Use an old washer tub for bonfires. Fill it up with wood and watch the pretty glow of fire through the holes. Just don't lay unused wood next to it. It will burn through the holes! For campers, you could also lay a grate over it to cook. Love this! By treneem219 from Louisville, TN ______________________________________________________ A young boy came to Sunday School late. His teacher knew that he was usually very prompt and asked him if anything was wrong. The boy replied no, nothing was wrong, that he was going fishing but his dad told him that he needed to go to church. The teacher was very impressed and asked the boy if his dad had explained to him why it was more important to go to church than to go fishing. The boy replied: "Yes he did. Dad said he didn't have enough bait for both of us."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
"Lizzie," asked Jill thoughtfully one day, "what would you do if you caught another woman in bed with your husband?" "With Phil?" Lizzie thought it over. "Let's see....... I'd break her cane, shoot her guide dog, and call a cab to take her back to the institution she escaped from." _____________________________________________________ A woman goes into a meat market and asks the butcher why his porkchops are 99 cents a pound when the guy across the street is selling his for 89 cents? The butcher says: "Well then, why don't you go over there and buy his?" The lady customer says: "He doesn't have any." The butcher says: "Well thats nothing, when I don't have any, I advertise mine for 79 cents."
This is an awesome sight that most of us don't get to see.

Today in 
1782 The Spanish captured Minorca from the British. 
1783 Sweden recognized the independence of the United States. 
1861 Samuel Goodale patented the moving picture peep show 
 machine. 
1885 Congo State was established under Leopold II of Belgium, 
 as a personal possession. 
1881 Phoenix, AZ, was incorporated. 
1917 Mexico's constitution was adopted. 
1917 The U.S. Congress passed the Immigration Act of 1917 
 (Asiatic Barred Zone Act) with an overwhelming majority. 
 The action overrode President Woodrow Wilson's 
 December 14, 1916 veto. 
1924 The BBC time signals, or "pips", from Greenwich 
 Observatory were heard for the first time. They are 
 broadcast every hour. 
1931 Maxine Dunlap became the first woman licensed as 
 a glider pilot. 
1958 Gamel Abdel Nasser was formally nominated to become 
 the first president of the United Arab Republic. 
1962 French President Charles De Gaulle called for 
 Algeria's independence. 
1982 Great Britain imposed economic sanctions against 
 Poland and Russia in protest against martial law in Poland. 
1988 A pair of indictments were unsealed in Florida, accusing 
 Panama's military leader, Gen. Manuel Antonio Noriega, of 
 bribery and drug trafficking. 
1994 White separatist Byron De La Beckwith was convicted in 
 Jackson, MS, of the 1963 murder of civil rights leader Medgar Evers. 
1997 Switzerland's "Big Three" banks announced they would create a 
 $71 million fund for Holocaust victims and their families. 
1997 Investment bank Morgan Stanley announced a $10 billion merger 
 with Dean Witter. 
1999 Mike Tyson was sentenced to a year in jail for assaulting 
 two people after a car accident on August 31, 1998. Tyson was 
 also fined $5,000, had to serve 2 years of probation, and had 
 to perform 200 hours of community service upon release. 
2001 Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman announced their separation. 
2003 U.S. Secretary of State Colin Powell presented evidence 
 to the U.N. concerning Iraq's material breach of U.N. Resolution 1441.
2015  smiled.


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Current program to replace Old registry booster 



Good Morning, ,

Today is Wednesday, February 4

While looking through the stuff marked for deting in
Mailwasher, I noticed this one:

Abuse@webby.com has won 500,000 Great British Pounds
and an HP Laptop.

Well, it would take a free laptop to get me to ever try 
an HP again, but the Great British Pounds sound intriguing.
How do they convert to British Pounds or to Dollars?

I didn't read the rest, but noticed, that they want the
bank information.

Well Abuse@webby.com does not have a bank account,
but if they show up, Mr Abuse will gladly abuse them.
Since MailWasher had already marked it for deleting,
I didn't even have to hit the DEL key.

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a
Fargo, ND man arrested for driving Zamboni while intoxicated
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1824 J.W. Goodrich introduced rubber galoshes to the public.
More of what happened on this day in history at History

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo. --- H. G. Wells (1866 - 1946) Computer games don't affect kids, I mean if Pac Man affected us as kids, we'd all be running around in darkened rooms, munching pills and listening to repetitive music. --- Marcus Brigstocke ______________________________________________________ A father was examining his son's report card. "One thing is definitely in your favor," he announced. "With this report card, you couldn't possibly be cheating." ______________________________________________________ The fireman had rushed into a burning building and rescued a beautiful young lady who was clad only in the top half of her baby-doll nightgown. He carried her in his arms down three flights of stairs and four blocks all the way to his car behind the fire hall. As they arrived there, she looked at him with great admiration and said, "Oh, you are wonderful. It must have taken great strength and courage to rescue me the way you did." "Yes it did," the fireman admitted. "I had to fight off three other firemen who were trying to get to you before me." ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Roy for this picture: Click through for the big picture Largest statue in the world of Ghenghis Khan, Mongolia
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Steven Anderson, 27 Fargo North Dakota Fargo, ND man arrested for driving Zamboni while intoxicated. A North Dakota man was arrested Friday night for driving a Zamboni under the influence. Police were summoned to the South Sports Arena in Fargo by witnesses who reported that Steven Anderson, 27, was driving the ice resurfacing machine in an erratic manner. Anderson, a seasonal worker at the municipal facility, was operating the Zamboni between periods of a girls high school hockey game. Anderson, seen in the above mug shot, was arrested after cops concluded that he was intoxicated. Charged with DUI, Anderson was booked into the county jail, from which he was released yesterday after posting bond. In a Twitter post with the hashtag “bumperzamboni,” a spectator at the arena reported that, “I’ve never seen a zamboni have so much trouble around the edges.” Anderson was fired after his arrest. According to Cass County court records, Anderson was busted in mid-December for drunk driving (a car) and possession of drug paraphernalia. He pleaded guilty last month to those misdemeanor counts and was ordered to perform community service and pay about $1100 in fines and fees. A 30-day jail sentence was suspended by a Municipal Court judge. Anderson’s rap sheet also includes a 2009 conviction for public consumption of alcohol. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Lindy Re: Uniblue Dear Webby, years ago you used to have a link to a Blue Registry Booster. I got that and it really made a huge difference. That was on my XP. Do you stll have a link to that? Lindy Dear Lindy That was the Uniblue Registry Booster. The current name for the much updated version is Uniblue PC Mechanic. See the banner just below here. The old XP version had some problem with high resolution wide monitors on some of the help pages. That has all been fixed, even though it is easy enough to use, so that very few people ever look at the instructions. Among a bunch of other things, PC Mechanic lets you weed out the Start-Up programs. Don't just elbow that part. Check which of those programs you DO want to start automatically. Usually 30 seconds longer start-up is not a big deal, or even a minute, compared to the annoyance of a program not being ready to use when you get back to the machine with your coffee. With PC-Mechanic, MalwareBytes and McAfee I just reboot whenever the Microsoft 2nd Tuesday update requires a reboot. The rest of the month is clear sailing with those guardian angels in place. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Swallow Pills with Food I have a lot of difficulty taking pills and vitamins - they would get stuck to the roof of my mouth or they would end up in the front of my mouth when swallowing water. I had better luck just swallowing them with saliva. I was thinking I have no trouble swallowing food, so what I do is when I'm eating I take my pills just before I swallow my well chewed food. I put a pill or 2 in my mouth closer to the back of my mouth and I swallow everything goes down perfectly, no more choking or pills rolling around and not going down. By Babbie [35] Most pharmacies will let you have smaller size pills, two or three times smaller but two or three times the quantity. I need 400 mg Gabapentin pills, which are huge, but the friendly people at the Costco pharmacy have frequently offered to sell me 200 or 100 mg pills in larger quantities. The cost is the same. If you have trouble with large pills, talk to your pharmacist. With Vitamines simply get the chewable kind. I use the Costco 500 mg chewable Vitamin C. It is like a refreshingly sour candy and I have used it as a substitute when I quit smoking a few years ago. I still use it like candy. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ Little Johnny's dad was a farmer in a poor district of the country. One day his Uncle Festus came to visit. Since there were limited accommodations, he was required to sleep with his young nephew, Little Johnny. When Uncle Festus came into the bedroom, he saw the Little Johnny kneeling at the far side of the bed with his head bowed. Thinking this was the child's religious upbringing, he decided to present a good example and kneeled at the other side of the bed with his head bowed. Little Johnny looked up and said, "Whatcha doin'?" "Why, the same thing you're doing", replied Uncle Festus. "Ma's gonna be mad", said Little Johnny. "The potty is on this side."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
There was a major sale at Victoria's Secret and Thorn wanted to get his wife some really sexy lingerie. The store was packed with women for this big sale and before he knew it, Thorn was pushed and shoved by frantic women all trying to get at the merchandise. Thorn remained calm for as long as he could, then bowed his head and pushed hard and effectively, and plowed through the crowd of women. "Hey you!", an angry female voice yelled out at him, "Try acting like a gentleman!". "That's what I HAVE BEEN doing," Thorn retorted, "But since that doesn't work in this zoo, I'm gonna act like you wimin!" _____________________________________________________ While on a car trip, an elderly couple stopped at a roadside restaurant for lunch. After finishing their meal, the man left his hat on the bench, but didn't miss it until they were back on the freeway. By then, they had to travel quite a distance before they could find a place to turn around. The woman fussed and complained all the way back to the restaurant, that they would be late getting to their destination, etc. She called her husband every bad name she could think of. When they finally arrived at the restaurant, as the man got out of the car to retrieve his hat, the woman yelled to him, "While you're in there, you might as well get my purse, too."
Bob Hope was a great patriotic American who gave his time and energy to entertain our troops for many years. He should be considered one of the greatest heroes of our time for what he did for all those guys and gals who were in harm’s way.

Today in 
1783 Britain declared a formal cessation of hostilities 
 with its former colonies, the United States of America. 
1789 Electors unanimously chose George Washington to be 
 the first president of the United States. 
1824 J.W. Goodrich introduced rubber galoshes to the public.
1847 In Maryland, the first U.S. Telegraph Company was 
 established. 
1861 Delegates from six southern states met in Montgomery, 
 AL, to form the Confederate States of America. 
1904 The Russo-Japanese War began after Japan laid siege 
 to Port Arthur. 
1913 Louis Perlman received a patent for his demountable 
 tire-carrying rims. 
1932 The first Winter Olympics were held in the United 
 States at Lake Placid, NY. 
1936 Radium E. became the first radioactive substance to 
 be produced synthetically. 
1948 Ceylon gained independence within the British Commonwealth. 
 The country later became known as Sri Lanka. 
1957 Smith-Corona Manufacturing Inc., of New York, began selling 
 portable electric typewriters. The first machine 
 weighed 19 pounds. 
1968 The world's largest hovercraft was launched at Cowes, 
 Isle of Wight. 
1973 The Reshef was unveiled as Israel's missile boat. 
1974 Patricia (Patty) Hearst was kidnapped in Berkeley, CA, by 
 the Symbionese Liberation Army. 
1976 An earthquake in Guatemala and Honduras killed more than 
 22,000 people. 
1985 U.S. President Ronald Reagan's defense budget called for 
 a tripling of the expenditure on the "Star Wars" research program. 
1993 Russian scientists unfurled a giant mirror in orbit 
 and flashed a beam of sunlight across Europe during the night. 
 Observers saw it only as a momentary flash. 
1997 A civil jury in California found O.J. Simpson liable in 
 the death of his ex-wife Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman. 
 Goldman's parents were awarded $8.5 million in compensatory 
 damages. 
1997 Two Israeli troop-carrying helicopters collided on their 
 way to Lebanon, all 73 soldiers and airmen aboard were killed. 
1997 President Milosevic of Serbia apparently surrendered to 
 the will of his people, ordering his government to recognize 
 opposition victories in local elections held in November 1996. 
1997 Mario Lemieux (Pittsburgh Penguins) scored his 600th 
 National Hockey League (NHL) goal during his 719th game. 
 Lemieux reached the milestone second fastest in history. 
 Gretzky had reached the plateau during his 718th game. 
1998 In northeast Afghanistan, at least 5,000 people were killed 
 in an earthquake that measured 6.1 on the Richter Scale. 
1999 Warplanes from Israel attacked south Lebanon just after 
 rockets were fired toward Israel. No casualies were claimed 
 on either side. 
1999 Amadou Diallo, an unarmed West African immigrant, was 
 shot and killed in front of his Bronx home by four plainclothes 
 New York City police officers. The officers had been 
 conducting a nighttime search for a rape suspect. 
2000 Austrian President Thomas Klestil swore in a coalition 
 government that included Joerg Haider's far-right Freedom 
 Party. European Union sanctions resulted from that action. 
2003 Yugoslavia was formally dissolved by lawmakers. The 
 country was replaced with a loose union of its remaining 
 two republics, Serbia and Montenegro. 
2015  smiled.


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Type Scandinavian characters 



Good Morning, ,

Today is Tuesday, February 3

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a
Florida robber, who claims he 
He Wasn't 'Good At The Robbery Thing'
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1690 The first paper money in America was issued by the 
 Massachusetts colony. The currency was used to pay soldiers 
 that were fighting in the war against Quebec. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History



______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
What is the difference between unethical and ethical advertising? Unethical advertising uses falsehoods to deceive the public; ethical advertising uses truth to deceive the public. --- Vilhjalmur Stefansson (1879 - 1962) ______________________________________________________ I volunteered recently to perform a parachute jump for charity. On our first day of training, the instructor made an important point about preparing for landing at 300 feet. "How do you know when you're at 300 feet?" asked one woman. "A good question," replied the instructor. "At 300 feet you can recognize the faces of people on the ground." The woman thought about this for awhile before saying, "What happens if there's no one there I know?" ______________________________________________________ >From Helga He didn't like the casserole And he didn't like my cake. My biscuits were too hard, Not like his mother used to make. I didn't perk the coffee right He didn't like the stew. I didn't mend his socks, The way his mother used to do. I pondered for an answer I was looking for a clue. Then I turned around and smacked him, Like his Mother used to do. ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Roy for this picture: Click through for the big picture Monastery in Armenia
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Stewart Charles McNeal, 34, Delray Beach, Florida, McNeal Tells Police He Wasn't 'Good At The Robbery Thing' He gets points for honesty. A man who allegedly attempted to rob a Dunkin' Donuts admitted to police that he "wasn't very good at the robbery thing." Stewart Charles McNeal, 34, turned himself in last Thursday after police in Delray Beach, Florida, circulated a surveillance photo of a robbery of the donut store that took place Jan. 21, WPTV reports. McNeal allegedly entered the Dunkin' Donuts around 12:20 .m. wearing a mask. Cops said he waited in line for several minutes before going up to the counter with a gun in hand. The clerk ignored him and attended to another customer, the Palm Beach Post reports. At one point, cops said, McNeal pulled off his mask and continued to wait for the employee to acknowledge him so he could commence with the robbery. McNeal allegedly took an undisclosed amount of money from a cash register and asked an employee to "forgive him." He allegedly left in a Honda Accord that was driven by an accomplice the suspect called "Chris," CBS12 reports. The driver is still on the loose, according to police. McNeal told police when he saw photos of himself everywhere, he figured the jig was up and turned himself in. He allegedly said the robbery was strictly to feed his drug habit, and admitted he "wasn't very good at the robbery thing," WPTV reports. McNeal is being held on a $20,000 bond on a charge of robbery with a firearm. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Svend Re: Scandahoovian characters Dear Webby, Did I miss something on the Deeproot way of typing in missing characters on the keyboard? - I don't see the scandihoovian ones like æ Æ ø Ø and å Å. Svend Did you download and install it, or are you just looking at the screenshot? Once you got it installed, click on the gear at the bottom, and select #2, Latin - Western Europe, Nordic There you got all the scandihøøvian Œhæräctërs. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Gorilla Glue for Repairing an Air Mattress Get Gorilla Glue, you can find it anywhere. Get a piece of fabric like a T-shirt. Cut it into small squares. Deflate the air mattress in this process and know where your pinhole is! Put Gorilla Glue on the felt and then on the fabric. Push it on to the hole. Then get a hair dryer, keep a little far away on warm for 2 minutes. Let it dry 3 to 4 hours. Fill your bed up and it's done. Hope I helped someone, good luck! By michael lonsdorf [1] ______________________________________________________ >From Max I'd been working on my business degree for about a year when I finally got to take a popular finance course. I went to the bookstore to buy the text and was shocked to find out that it would cost me $96. I asked how much it was worth if I sold it back at the end of the semester. "You'll get $24," said the clerk. "This is insane," I protested as I wrote out the check. "I know," replied the clerk sympathetically. "I've always thought that a person who buys a book for $96 and then sells it for $24 should fail the course."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
The deliveryman looked over the gate towards the house which was his package's destination, and saw a large and aggressive- looking dog on the lawn, staring at him. There was also a woman looking at him from an open first-floor window. He shouted to the woman, "Is your dog friendly?" She said, "Yes, MY dog is friendly." So the deliveryman opened the gate, and was promptly savaged by the dog. When he had been rescued from the dog, the deliveryman angrily said to the woman, "I thought you said your dog was friendly!" "MY dog is friendly and inside here with me." said the woman, "The one you wrestled with is not my dog." _____________________________________________________ Here is an annual favorite: Two priests died at the same time and met Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter said, "I'd like to get you guys in now, but our computer's down. You'll have to go back to Earth for about a week, but you can't go back as priests. What'll it be?" The first priest says, "I've always wanted to be an eagle, soaring above the Rocky Mountains." "So be it," says St. Peter, and off flies the first priest. The second priest mulls this over for a moment and asks, "Will any of this week 'count', St. Peter?" "No, I told you the computer's down. There's no way we can keep track of what you're doing." "In that case," says the second priest, "I've always wanted to be a stud." "So be it" says St. Peter, and the second priest disappears. A week goes by, the computer is fixed, and the Lord tells St. Peter to recall the two priests. "Will you have any trouble locating them?" He asks. "The first one should be easy," says St. Peter. "He's somewhere over the Rockies, flying with the eagles. But the second one could prove to be more difficult." "Why?" asketh the Lord. "He's on a snow tire, somewhere in Montana."
Let's travel!

Today in 
1488 The Portuguese navigator Bartholomeu Diaz landed at 
 Mossal Bay in the Cape, the first European known to have 
 landed on the southern extremity of Africa. 
1690 The first paper money in America was issued by the 
 Massachusetts colony. The currency was used to pay soldiers 
 that were fighting in the war against Quebec. 
1783 Spain recognized the independence of the United States. 
1815 The world's first commercial cheese factory was 
 established in Switzerland. 
1862 Thomas Edison printed the "Weekly Herald" and distributed 
 it to train passengers traveling between Port Huron and 
 Detroit, MI. It was the first time a newspaper had been printed 
 on a train. 
1913 The 16th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution was ratified. 
 It authorized the power to impose and collect income tax. 
1916 In Ottawa, Canada's original parliament buildings burned down. 
1917 The U.S. broke off diplomatic relations with Germany, which 
 had announced a policy of unrestricted submarine warfare. 
1918 The Twin Peaks Tunnel began service. It is the longest 
 streetcar tunnel in the world at 11,920 feet. 
1941 In Vichy, France, the Nazis used force to restore 
 Pierre Laval to office. 
1945 Russia agreed to enter World War II against Japan. 
1966 The first rocket-assisted controlled landing on the 
 Moon was made by the Soviet space vehicle Luna IX. 
1969 At the Palestinian National Congress in Cairo, 
 Yasser Arafat was appointed leader of the PLO. 
1972 The first Winter Olympics in Asia were held at Sapporo
1998 Texas executed Karla Faye Tucker. She was the first woman 
 executed in the U.S. since 1984. 
1998 In Italy, a U.S. Military plane hit a cable causing 
 the death of 20 skiers on a lift. 
2009 Eric Holder was sworn in as attorney general. He was the 
 first African-American to hold the post. 
2010 The Alberto Giacometti sculpture L'Homme qui marche sold 
 for $103.7 million. 
2015  smiled.


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Extra characters program 



Good Morning, ,

Today is Monday, February 2

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a
Texan, who bragged on FaceBook about 16 outstanding warrants.
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1536 The Argentine city of Buenos Aires was founded by 
 Pedro de Mendoza of Spain. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History


Goats enjoying life

______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Never eat more than you can lift. --- Miss Piggy If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer. --- Alfred North Whitehead (1861 - 1947) ______________________________________________________ There is a story about a monastery in Europe perched high on a cliff several hundred feet in the air. The only way to reach the monastery was to be suspended in a basket which was pulled to the top by several monks who pulled and tugged with all their strength. Obviously, the ride up the steep cliff in that basket was terrifying. One tourist got exceedingly nervous about half-way up as he noticed that the rope by which he was suspended was old and frayed. With a trembling voice he asked the monk who was riding with him in the basket how often they changed the rope. The monk thought for a moment and answered brusquely, "Usually right after it breaks." ______________________________________________________ After a young couple brought their new baby home, the wife suggested that her husband should try his hand at changing diapers. "I'm busy," he said, "I'll do the next one." The next time came around and she asked again. The husband looked puzzled, "Oh! I didn't mean the next diaper. I meant the next baby." ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Roy for this picture: Click through for the big picture Tuscany
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Edward Smith 22, Mineral Wells, Texas Texan bragged on facebook about 16 outstanding arrest warrants A Texas man who bragged on Facebook about having 16 outstanding arrest warrants was busted after a tipster called cops to report the ill-advised online boasting. Edward Smith, 22, was collared following a January 20 post reporting, “So, I have 16 warrants out right now. Lol they know where I’m at tho so, it must not be TOO bad.” When cops in Mineral Wells, a city 80 miles west of Dallas, researched warrant records, they determined that Wells only had 14 active warrants, some of which were three years old. According to records, Wells has been cited for petty theft, driving without insurance, and other minor infractions (for which he owes more than $1400 in fines). Smith--seen in the above mug shot--was subsequently released from custody after agreeing to a fine payment schedule. While his personal page appears to have been deleted, an Eddie Smith “community” page has appeared on Facebook. After Mineral Wells police arrested Smith, they went to Facebook and made their own post: “In the ‘you can't make this up’ file, a subject posted on Facebook that they had a bunch of Mineral Wells PD warrants but we couldn't do anything because they don't live in the city limits... then we show up and arrest them on 16 warrants.” ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Neil Re: Program for Euro Character Dear Webby, How to type the Euro Character I use a program called Deeproot Extra Keys to type special characters. It is free, stable and very easy to use. It takes a miniscule amount of system resources, and has never interfered with any of the other programs running on my computer Check it out http://www.deeproot.co.uk/extrakeys.html Neil Dear Neil Great! I downloaded and tried it. Does not take long at all to get used to it. Thanks! Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Saving Record of Paint Color When my husband paints a room, he removes the light switch plate. Writes the brand of paint and the color under the light switch plate. When he is done painting, I cover the writing with the light switch plate. If you ever need to get any more of the paint for that room, just remove the switch plate cover and you have all the information you will need. I can't rely on my memory anymore, so this really works for us. By Dorothy from New Creek, WV ______________________________________________________ A young bride and groom to be had just selected their wedding rings. As the young lady admired the platinum and diamond ring she had chosen for herself, she suddenly looked concerned. "Tell me," she asked the rather elderly salesman, "is there anything special I'll have to do to take care of this ring?" With a fatherly smile, the salesman said, "One of the best ways to protect a fancy wedding ring like that is to never take it off and to soak it in dishwater three times a day."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
A lady called United Airlines and asked for a reservation from Los Angeles to New York. The clerk knew that the plane was very full with baggage and passengers. "How much do you weigh, Ma'am?" asked the clerk. "With or without clothes?" the passenger asked. "Well," said the clerk, "how do you intend to travel? With or without clothes?" _____________________________________________________ The census taker knocked on Donna's door. She answered all his questions except one. She refused to tell him her age. "But everyone tells their age to the census taker," he said. "Did Miss Maisy Hill, and Miss Daisy Hill tell you their ages?" she asked. "Certainly," he replied. "Well, I'm the same age as they are," she snapped. "As old as the Hills," he mumbled as he wrote on his form.
Old Service Stations Love some of the old cars and trucks, a lot of them before my time though.

Today in 
1536 The Argentine city of Buenos Aires was founded by 
 Pedro de Mendoza of Spain. 
1653 New Amsterdam, now known as New York City incorporated. 
1848 The Mexican War was ended with the signing of the 
 Treaty of Guadalupe Hidalgo. The treaty turned over portions 
 of land to the U.S., including Texas, New Mexico, Nevada, 
 Utah, Arizona, California and parts of Colorado and Wyoming. 
 The U.S. gave Mexico $15,000,000 and assumed responsibility 
 of all claims against Mexico by American citizens. Texas 
 had already entered the U.S. on December 29, 1845. 
1848 The first shipload of Chinese emigrants arrived in 
 San Francisco, CA. 
1863 Samuel Langhorne Clemens used a pseudonym for the first 
 time. He is better remembered by the pseudonym which is 
 Mark Twain. 
1870 The "Cardiff Giant" was revealed to be nothing more 
 than carved gypsum. The discovery in Cardiff, NY, was 
 alleged to be the petrified remains of a human. 
1878 Greece declared war on Turkey. 
1880 The S.S. Strathleven arrived in London with the first 
 successful shipment of frozen mutton from Australia. 
1887 The beginning of Groundhog Day in Punxsutawney, PA. 
1892 William Painter patented the bottle cap. 
1893 The Edison Studio in West Orange, NJ, made history 
 when they filmed the first motion picture close-up. The 
 studio was owned and operated by Thomas Edison. 
1913 Grand Central Terminal officially opened at 12:01 a.m. 
 Even though construction was not entirely complete more than 
 150,000 people visited the new terminal on its opening day. 
1935 Leonard Keeler conducted the first test of the polygraph 
 machine, in Portage, WI. 
1943 During World War II, the remainder of Nazi forces from 
 the Battle of Stalingrad surrendered to the Soviets. 
 Stalingrad has since been renamed Volgograd. 
1946 The first Buck Rogers automatic pistol was made. 
1971 Idi Amin assumed power in Uganda after a coup that 
 ousted President Milton Obote. 
1980 The situation known as "Abscam" began when reports 
 surfaced that the FBI had conducted a sting operation that 
 targeted members of the U.S. Congress. Phony Arab businessmen 
 were used in the operation. 
1989 The final Russian armored column left Kabul, Afghanistan, 
 after nine years of military occupation. 
1990 South African President F.W. de Klerk lifted a ban on 
 the African National Congress and promised to free Nelson Mandela. 
1998 U.S. President Clinton introduced the first balanced budget 
 in 30 years. 
1999 19 people were killed at Luanda international airport 
 when a cargo plane crashed just after takeoff. 
1999 Hugo Chávez Frías took office. He had been elected 
 president of Venezuela in December 1998. 
2004 It was reported that a white powder had been found in 
 an office of Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist. The CDC 
 (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention) later confirmed 
 that the powder was the poison ricin.
2015  smiled.


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How to type the Euro character 



Good Morning, ,

Today is Sunday, February 1

Thank you, Elizabeth!


Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a
Phillip Roberts stabbed woman with screwdriver in Texas gym
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1900 Eastman Kodak Co. introduced the $1 Brownie box camera. 
More of what happened on this day in history at History
______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Under democracy one party always devotes its chief energies to trying to prove that the other party is unfit to rule - and both commonly succeed, and are right. --- H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956) ______________________________________________________ A country lad was being interviewed for a farm laborer's job. The boss said, "You must be fit. Have you had any illnesses?" "No Sir," said the lad. The boss asked, "Any accidents?" The boy said, "No Sir." The boss said to him, "But you walked in here on crutches. You must have had an accident!" The lad said, "Oh, no Sir! I was tossed by a bull. That was no accident. He's a mean cuss and I KNOW he did it on purpose! But I got him loaded onto the trailer before I left." ______________________________________________________ CHURCH BULLETIN BLOOPERS Head Deacon and Dead Deaconess Walters will be giving a talk on marriage. There will not be any Women Worth Watching this week. Child care provided with reservations. I was hungry and you gave me something to eat; I was thirty and you gave me something to drink. The visiting monster today is Rev. Jack Bains. The Boars of Trustees will be meeting Tuesday night at 8PM The activity will take place on the church barking lot. ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Roy for this picture: Click through for the big picture Neuschwanstein
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Phillip Roberts 32, Irving, Texas Phillip Roberts stabbed woman with screwdriver in Texas gym A woman in Irving, Texas, remains hospitalized after being stabbed with a screwdriver while working out at her local gym. The incident happened Tuesday morning at a 24 Hour Fitness. The 49-year-old victim was on an elliptical machine when she was allegedly attacked by a man later identified as Phillip Roberts, 32. Authorities said Roberts allegedly went up to the woman at random and stabbed her three times in the neck and the back, puncturing a lung in the process, according to KHOU TV. Doctors said the injuries are not life-threatening. Witnesses said there was no conversation between Roberts and his victim. "She was on an elliptical, he came and the next thing you know he started swinging at her," an employee told the 911 operator after the attack. "A bunch of members are saying that he's been walking around shouting about Satan." Records show there was a 911 call made from the gym before the attack from a different woman reporting a man -- who fit Roberts' description -- acting suspiciously. "He's inside the gym walking around with a top coat on and a suitcase, and he's kinda like, uh, looking at people crazy. And we come every morning at 4 and he's just random," the caller said, according to WFAA. The woman emphasized the man wasn't working out, just looking at people with a "crazy stare." An officer came to the gym only to be told by the staff everything was fine and that Roberts was a member. The attack happened after the officer left the gym. Witnesses tackled the suspect, sat on him and held him down until police could return to the gym. Officers found a screwdriver under Roberts' body when they rolled him over. Roberts was arrested on charges of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon. He remains in the Irving Jail on $100,000 bail. Authorities said Roberts has a Tennessee driver's license but no known address, according to the Fort Worth Star-Telegram. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Alexis Re: Euro Character Dear Webby, Once upon a time you had a link to a page, that showed all the characters, that are not on a regular keyboard. I need the Euro character. Do you still have that? Thanks Alexis Dear Alexis you get the Euro by holding down ALT and typing 0128 on the numeric keypad. The page I made ages ago with all the high ASCII characters is at http://webby.com/char If you don't have a keyboard with numeric keypad, simply copy whichever character you need from that page, and paste it where you need it. It's not as fast as with a regular keyboard, but a lot less frustrating than trying to fake a numeric keypad on a narrow laptop. I asked a European subscriber how they make the € They use CTRL ALT E. On NorthAmerican keyboards, that works in Skype and in Open Office. Depending on the version, it also works in WORD, but not in Excel. ALT 0128 works fine in Excel, and since most people use a keyboard with numerical keypad for working on spreadsheets, nobody has yet written an add-in for that. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Store Super Glue In Your Refrigerator I keep superglue in my refrigerator. I have a small tube that is at least 8 years old now, and it's still good! I just put the top back on when I'm done using it, and keep it upright in the butter compartment on the inside door. Source: One of the maintenance guys from work told me about this. By sjackie2000 from Riverdale, GA ______________________________________________________ A man and his ten-year-old son were on a ski trip miles from home. At the boy's insistence, they decided to attend the Sunday worship service at a small rural church. The father forgot to bring any cash, so he reached in his pocket and gave his son a dime to drop in the offering plate as it was passed. As they walked back to their car after the service, the father complained. "The service was too long," he lamented. "The sermon was boring, and the singing was off key." Finally the boy said, "Daddy, I thought it was pretty good for a dime."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
An airport ticketing agent was working at the counter and began asking a passenger the required security questions. "Have you received any objects from an unknown person to carry aboard the airplane today?" "No," said the woman. "Did you pack your own suitcase?" she inquired, pointing to the traveler's rolling carry-on bag. "Yes," she answered. "Has your bag been under your control since you've been in the airport?" "Well, no, not exactly," the passenger said with a sigh. "The silly thing keeps either trying to go every which way, or else it's trying to trip me. I feel like I am under IT's control." _____________________________________________________ Donald MacDonald from the Isle of Skye went to study at an English university and was living in the hall of residence with all the other students there. After he had been there a month, his mother came to visit him. "And how do you find the English students, Donald?" she asked. "Mother," he replied, "they're such terrible, noisy people. The one on that side keeps banging his head on the wall and won't stop. The one on the other side screams and screams all night." "Oh Donald! How do you manage to put up with these awful noisy English neighbors?" "Mother, I do nothing. I just ignore them. I just stay here quietly, practising my bagpipes."
Optical Illusions: Careful! Don't hurt your brain looking at these.

Today in 
1788 Isaac Briggs and William Longstreet patented the steamboat. 
1793 France declared war on Britain and Holland. 
1793 Ralph Hodgson patented oiled silk. 
1867 In the U.S., bricklayers start working 8-hour days. 
1893 Thomas A. Edison completed work on the world's first 
 motion picture studio in West Orange, NJ. 
1898 The Travelers Insurance Company of Hartford, CT, issued 
 the first automobile insurance policy. Dr. Truman Martin of 
 Buffalo, NY, paid $11.25 for the policy, which gave him 
 $5,000 in liability coverage. 
1900 Eastman Kodak Co. introduced the $1 Brownie box camera. 
1920 The first armored car was introduced. 
1920 Canada's Royal North West Mounted Police changed their 
 name to the Royal Canadian Mounted Police. The organization 
 was commissioned in 1873. 
1921 Carmen Fasanella registered as a taxicab owner and driver 
 in Princeton, New Jersey. Fasanella retired November 2, 1989 
 after 68 years and 243 days of service. 
1930 The Times published its first crossword puzzle. 
1951 The first telecast of an atomic explosion took place. 
1951 The first X-ray moving picture process was demonstrated. 
1958 The United Arab Republic was formed by a union of Egypt 
 and Syria. It was broken 1961. 
1968 During the Vietnam War, South Vietnamese National Police 
 Chief Brig. Gen. Nguyen Ngoc Loan executed a Viet Cong officer, 
 a rapist and murderer of civilians, with a pistol shot to the 
 head. The scene was captured in a news photograph and used 
 extensively by the anti-war movement. 
1979 Patty Hearst was released from prison after serving 22 
 months of a seven-year sentence for bank robbery. Her 
 sentence had been commuted by U.S. President Carter. 
1979 Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini was welcomed in Tehran as 
 he ended nearly 15 years of exile, during which he sent a 
 steady stream of anti-Shah and anti democracy tapes to Iran. 
1991 A USAir jetliner crashed atop a commuter plane at Los 
 Angeles International Airport. 35 people were killed. 
1994 Jeff Gillooly pled guilty in Portland, OR, for his role 
 in the attack on figure skater Nancy Kerrigan. Gillooly, 
 Tonya Harding's ex-husband, struck a plea bargain under 
 which he confessed to racketeering charges in exchange for 
 testimony implicating Harding. 
1999 Former White House intern Monica Lewinsky gave a deposition 
 that was videotaped for senators weighing impeachment charges 
 against U.S. President Clinton. 
2001 Three Scottish judges found Abdel Basset al-Mergrahi 
 guilty of the 1988 bombing of Pan Am Flight 103, which 
 killed 270 people. The court said that Megrahi was a member 
 of the Libyan intelligence service. Al-Amin Khalifa, who 
 had been co-accused, was acquitted and freed. 
2003 NASA's space shuttle Columbia exploded while re-entering 
 the Earth's atmosphere. All seven astronauts on board were killed.
2015  smiled.


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Fix problems with copying from Gmail 



Good Morning, ,

Today is Saturday, January 31

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to a
Naked female Pennsylvania driver, who sat atop whisky bottle
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
1747 The first clinic specializing in the treatment of 
 venereal diseases was opened at London Dock Hospital.  
More of what happened on this day in history at History
______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort. --- Herm Albright (1876 - 1944) ______________________________________________________ >From Rona I accompanied my husband to get a haircut. While flipping through a magazine I found a hairstyle that would look good on me. I asked the receptionist if I could take the magazine next door to make a copy of the hairstyle photo. "Well, okay," she replied, "but leave some ID--a driver's license or credit card." "But my husband is here getting his hair cut," I explained. "Yeah... but we need something worth coming back for." ______________________________________________________ I'm not saying that the customer service in my bank is bad, not at all ! When I went in the other day and asked the clerk to check my balance. She came around the counter, and bumped into me. I think I will ask her to check my balance every chance I get! ______________________________________________________ Grandma and Grandpa were sitting in their porch rockers watching the beautiful sunset and reminiscing about "the good days," when Grandma turned to Grandpa and said, "Honey, do you remember how, after we were first married, you'd kind of nibble on my ear?" Grandpa slowly got up from his rocker and headed into the house. Alarmed, Grandma said, "Honey, where are you going?" Grandpa replied, "Do ged my deef!" (To get my teeth) ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Roy for this picture: Click through for the big picture Sveti Stefan Island, Montenegro
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Justine King, 33, Aliquippa, Pennsylvania Naked Pennsylvania driver sat atop whisky bottle A female driver who was not wearing pants or underwear was sitting atop an empty bottle of Black Velvet whisky when police approached her following a recent traffic accident, according to a court complaint charging the motorist with drunk driving, lewdness, and other criminal counts. Pennsylvania cops allege that Justine King, 33, struck another vehicle around 11 PM while driving near her home in Aliquippa, a city outside Pittsburgh. Police found King in the driver’s seat of her 2003 Chevrolet Malibu “with airbags deployed.” The vehicle was sitting in an intersection. When told that she had hit another car, King (seen at right) replied, “No I did not. I live around the corner and was just picking up my boyfriend.” While peering into the vehicle, a cop “observed that King was not wearing any pants or underpants.” The garments, the officer added, “were on the driver’s side under the pedals.” Officer Joshua Stanga also reported that King “was sitting naked on top of an open empty bottle of Black Velvet liquor.” When directed to put on her clothes and exit the Chevy, King said, “I don’t have any pants! I left my home without them!” After ignoring several demands to get out of the car, King was pulled from the vehicle the hard way, handcuffed, and placed into a police cruiser. She was “extremely belligerent, kicking, pulling away, and struggling” as Stanga sought to detain her, according to the complaint. Much fun was had by all, I imagine. Asked to identify herself, King responded, “The government got my name. You ain’t getting it! Ask the government.” King, who eventually provided her name, kicked out the cruiser’s back window, while also “continuously banging her head off the inside of the window panel.” King was charged earlier this month in connection with a separate September 30 incident. The January 15 complaint accuses her of drunk driving, resisting arrest, reckless driving, open lewdness, and disorderly conduct. She is scheduled for a February 20 District Court arraignment. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Barbara Re: Can't copy from Gmail Dear Webby, I have an e-mail friend that I’ve known for years and she’s having trouble with her gmail copy and pasting. Since I only use gmail as a throw away address I don’t do much with it. Here is what she wrote me: “BTW: have you noticed that it is almost impossible to copy a body of a gmail post anymore? I highlight and copy, but when I try to paste into a new post, there is nothing there. It is very frustrating. Do you know a way around it? I think they want to link who gets each post. If we cut and paste, the trail is broken.“ Do you know the answer? If you do I’ll tell her. By the way she said she subscribed to your Humor Letter when I sent her one with my Bonus Link in it. One of my sisters and one of my cousins subscribed to it too but they have Yahoo email so don’t receive it. I just email it to them. My best Barbara Dear Barbara That copy / paste problem is not unique to Gmail. No need to fear nefarious intentions by Gmail. It's simply a case of not enough free RAM. The same thing happens with Excel. Can't copy/paste with the mouse buttons. The remedy? Run CrapCleaner. It's free in my Tool Box. Sometimes a short term solution is to copy a comma or period to overwrite the previously copied large item. Quite often after that you can copy/paste normally again. As for the yahoos: Too much secret and unadmitted cybersex leads to an allergy against reading instructions. Happens to many AOLers too. Tell them to find somebody, who can whitelist humor@webby.com or make a filter to tell Yahoo not to censor or spam the Humor Letter. A lot of yahoos receive the Humor Letter without a problem most of the time. They admit that Yahoo is not as reliable in delivering it as Gmail or Protonmail, but they just go and read it online when Yahoo fails to deliver it. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Add Fresh Scent to Toilet Paper When you are ready to change the roll of toilet paper. Put a few drops of essential oils on the inside cardboard roll or spray your favorite fragrance into the cardboard roll. And the roll will absorb the scent throughout the entire roll. Ahhhh! Source: A friend By Jackie H. [43] ______________________________________________________ An Irishman went to London for a visit to the circus. While there, he saw a man with an elephant act. The man claimed the elephant could look at a person and tell that person's age. The Irishman was very skeptical and said so, in no uncertain terms. The man had the elephant look at a small boy and the elephant stamped its foot 9 times. "Is that right?" he asked the boy. "Yes, I'm nine!" the boy said. The Irishman continued his loud heckling, still not believing that this was true. The man asked the elephant to tell the ages of several other people, and each time the elephant stamped his foot and the people said he was correct. The Irishman got even louder and more abusive toward the man. Finally the man could take it no longer and wagered the Irishman that the elephant could look at him and tell him his age. The Irishman took him up on the wager. The elephant looked real close at the Irishman, turned around, raised his tail and cut wind like you wouldn't believe. Then he turned back around, knocked the Irishman to the ground with his trunk and then stomped on him twice. The Irishman, crumpled and bleeding, staggered back to his feet and with a sound of disbelief in his voice cried, "Lard, Thunder and Murphy, he's right!...Farty-two!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
Jock and Angus, two craggy Scots, were sitting before the clubhouse fireplace after 18 holes on a raw, blustery Christmas Day. The ice slowly melted from their beards and collected in puddles under their chairs. Outside, the wind howled off the North Sea and snow and hail rattled against the windows. The pair sat in silence over their whiskies. Finally, Jock spoke, "Next Monday, same time?" "Aye," Angus replied, "weather permittin'." _____________________________________________________ Little Johnny's new baby brother was screaming up a storm. He asked his mom, "Where'd we get him?" His mother replied, "He came from heaven, Johnny." Johnny says, "WOW! I can see why they threw him out!"
This looks like such fun for those of us who grew up in the ‘50’s and early ‘60’s.

Today in 
1606 Guy Fawkes was executed after being convicted for his 
 role in the "Gunpowder Plot" against the English 
 Parliament and King James I. 
1747 The first clinic specializing in the treatment of 
 venereal diseases was opened at London Dock Hospital. 
1858 The Great Eastern, the five-funnelled steamship 
 designed by Brunel, was launched at Millwall. 
1865 The 13th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution was passed 
 by the U.S. House of Representatives. The amendment 
 abolished slavery in the United States. 
1876 All Native American Indians were ordered to move 
 into reservations. 
1893 The trademark "Coca-Cola" was first registered in the 
 United States Patent Office. 
1917 Germany announced its policy of unrestricted 
 submarine warfare. 
1929 The USSR exiled Leon Trotsky. He found asylum in Mexico. 
1930 U.S. Navy Lt. Ralph S. Barnaby became the first glider 
 pilot to have his craft released from a dirigible, a large 
 blimp, at Lakehurst, NJ. 
1934 Jim Londos defeated Joe Savoldi in a one-fall match in 
 Chicago, IL. The crowd of 20,000 was one of the largest 
 crowds to see a wrestling match. 
1940 The first Social Security check was issued by the 
 U.S. Government. 
1944 During World War II, U.S. forces invaded Kwajalein 
 Atoll and other areas of the Japanese-held Marshall Islands. 
1945 Private Eddie Slovik became the only U.S. soldier since 
 the U.S. Civil War to be executed for desertion. 
1946 A new constitution in Yugoslavia created six constituent 
 republics (Serbia, Montenegro, Croatia, Slovenia, 
 Bosnia-Herzegovina, Macedonia) subordinated to a central 
 authority, on the model of the USSR. 
1950 U.S. President Truman announced that he had ordered 
 development of the hydrogen bomb. 
1958 Explorer I was put into orbit around the earth. It was 
 the first U.S. earth satellite. 
1971 Astronauts Alan B. Shepard Jr., Edgar D. Mitchell and 
 Stuart A. Roosa blasted off aboard Apollo 14 on a mission 
 to the moon. 
1971 Telephone service between East and West Berlin was 
 re-established after 19 years. 
1982 Sandy Duncan gave her final performance as "Peter Pan" 
 in Los Angeles, CA. She completed 956 performances without 
 missing a show. 
1983 The wearing of seat belts in cars became compulsory 
 in Britain. 
1983 JCPenney announced plans to spend in excess of $1 billion 
 over the next five years to modernize stores and to 
 accelerate a repositioning program. 
1985 The final Jeep rolled off the assembly line at the AMC 
 plant in Toledo, OH. 
1990 McDonald's Corp. opened its first fast-food restaurant 
 in Moscow, Russia. 
1995 U.S. President Clinton invoked presidential emergency 
 authority to provide a $20 billion loan to Mexico to 
 stabilize its economy. 
1996 In Columbo, Sri Lanka, a truck was rammed into the 
 gates of the Central Bank. The truck filled with explosives 
 killed at least 86 and injured 1,400. 
2000 An Alaska Airlines jet crashed into the ocean off 
 Southern California. All 88 people on board were killed. 
2001 A Scottish court in the Netherlands convicted one Libyan 
 and acquitted a second in the bombing of Pan Am Flight 103 
 over Lockerbie, Scotland, that occurred in 1988. 
2015  smiled.


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Windows Error 41 



Good Morning, ,

Today is Friday, January 30
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!


Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to 
Californian arrested for 
using 'fake' furniture store 
to grow marijuana.
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
 
More of what happened on this day in history at History
______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Art is making something out of nothing and selling it. --- Frank Zappa (1940 - 1993) ______________________________________________________ Company Excercise Program: This company claims not to need any further exercise programs because their empoyees already are jumping to conclusions, beating around the bush, running down the boss, going around in circles, dragging their feet, dodging responsibility, passing the buck, climbing the ladder, wading through paperwork, pulling strings, throwing their weight around, stretching the truth, bending the rules, and pushing their luck by bouncing checks in the cafeteria! ______________________________________________________ Ole and Lena were sitting down to their usual morning cup of coffee listening to the weather report on the radio. "There will be 3 to 5 inches of snow today, and a snow emergency has been declared," the weather report said. "To allow snow clearing you must park your cars on the odd numbered side of the streets." Ole said, "Oh, okay," and got up from his coffee. The next day they were sitting down with their morning cups of coffee. The weather forecast was, "There will be 2 to 4 inches of snow today, and a snow emergency has been declared. To allow snow clearing you must park your cars on the even numbered side of the streets." Again Ole replied, "Oh, okay," and got up from his coffee. Two days later, again they're sitting down with their cups of coffee and the weather forecast said, "There will be 6 to 8 inches of snow today, and a snow emergency has been declared. To allow snow clearing you must park your cars on the..." and the power went out. Ole didn't get the rest of the instructions. He turned to Lena, "Gee, what am I going to do now, Lena?" Lena replied, "Aw, Ole, just leave the car in the darned garage today." ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Roy for this picture: Click through for the big picture Manarola, Italy
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Phuc Nguyen 39, Gilroy, California Californian arrested for using 'fake' furniture store to grow marijuana A scheme to grow marijuana in the back of a phony furniture store went up in smoke after authorities got wind of what was really going on at the premises. Police in Gilroy, California, arrested Phuc Nguyen, 39, on January 22 at Gilroy Furniture & More, which authorities said was never open for business and never sold a single couch, chair or armoire. Instead, the "fake" furniture store was a front for a huge marijuana grow operation, according to the Santa Clara County Sheriff's Department. Detectives found more than 1,000 pot plants in the rear of the store and more than 50 pounds of processed marijuana, the sheriff's office said in a statement. The estimated value of the marijuana was more than $2 million. Detectives said Nguyen allegedly stole around $80,000 from a power company by bypassing the electrical meter. The alleged electricity theft was a serious fire hazard because none of the wiring was done to electrical code requirements, according to the release. Nguyen was arrested on charges of theft of utilities and illegal cultivation of marijuana for sale. He remains in the Santa Clara County jail on $200,000 bail, according to KIONrightnow.com. There was a related arrest earlier this month when a man named Tuan Dan Nguyen, 50, was allegedly caught with 320 pounds of marijuana plants valued at $700,000 in a warehouse on the same street, NBC Bay Area reports. The sheriff's office says the two Nguyens are not related, but are "business associates." ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Joe Re: Critical Error 41 Dear Webby, how do I resolve this error on my laptop, I've contacted windows to no avail. This error blocks my diagnostics tools & I receive hundreds of spam in my Yahoo mailbox everyday. Love your newsletter. TYVM, Joe F. Dear Joe Critical Error 41 is normally because of a messy reboot or a reboot while going to sleep / hibernation. That can be caused by bad or overloaded power supply or too much stuff plugged into USB ports or a virus or a registry conflict or an overload caused by scanning with certain anti-virus programs or conflicting audio drivers. Error 41 is a secondary symptom, and does not indicate what caused a messy reboot attempt. The spam is due to being handicapped by Yahoo, and probably a virus infection. Quite likely your address was sold the last time Yahoo got hacked. Mailwasher should take care of that spam. Go to http://webby.com/mailwasher and get a free trial. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Individual Apple Crunch An individual apple crunch you make in the microwave. Approximate Time: 5 minutes Ingredients: 1 apple, peeled & sliced 2 Tbsp sugar 1 Tbsp all-purpose flour or oatmeal 1/4 tsp cinnamon 1 Tbsp chopped nuts 1 tsp butter or margarine, melted Steps: Put the apple in a small, glass casserole dish. In a small bowl combine the sugar, flour or oatmeal, cinnamon, and nuts and mix well. Sprinkle over the apples. Dot with butter. Microwave, uncovered on high for 2 - 2 1/2 minutes or until the apples are tender. Serve with whipped cream, if desired. Makes 1 serving By Jackie H. [43] ______________________________________________________ Strouse, Parris and Shildroth are at the doctor for a memory test. The doctor says to Strouse, "What is three times three?" "274" was his reply. The doctor says to Parris, "It's your turn. What is three times three?" "Tuesday" replies Parris. The doctor says to Shildroth, "Okay, your turn. What's three times three"? "Nine" says Shildroth. "That's great!" says the doctor. "How did you get that"? "Simple," says Shildroth. "I subtracted 274 from Tuesday"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
A doctor thought he recognized a man who was ahead of him in the line at the bank as a patient whom he had not seen for twenty or more years. So he asked him how he was doing. "Just great! As healthy as anybody can be!" "Sounds like you must have followed the instructions on the medicine I gave you." the Doctor said. "I sure did. The bottle said 'Keep tightly closed'. Never even broke the seal on it." _____________________________________________________ Two rich men were talking over coffee and croissants at their country club one day and one of them said to the other one, "Hey, I tell you my driver is really stupid... you don't think so? Let me show you." And he called his driver Tammy over and said, "Tammy, here is a 10 dollar bill, go to the car showroom a nd buy me a Mercedes." To which Tammy replied, "Yes Sir! Right away!" and rushed outside. The rich man turned to his friend and said, "See, I told you she was stupid." The other rich man said, "That's nothing, you want to see stupid, I will show you stupid." And he called his driver, Terri: "Terri, go home now and check to see if I'm at home." Terri said, "Yes Sir!! Right away, Sir" and ran outside. "See what I told you? She doesn't even have enough brains to know that I cannot be at home if I am here." 5 minutes later the two drivers met at the donut shop. Tammy said to Terri, "Eh, you know my boss is sooo stupid. He gave me 10 dollars and asked me to go to the car showroom and buy him a Mercedes.....Doesn't he know that today is Sunday?? The showroom is closed!" Terri replied, "You think he is stupid, huh? My boss is sooo much worse, he asked me to go home to check if he is at home....I got a cellphone, right, why should I drive all the way across town if I can call home to check, after I have a few donuts !!!!"
There are some snazzy beards and moustaches here. Some weird ones too.

Today in 
1649 England's King Charles I was beheaded. 
1790 The first purpose-built lifeboat was launched on the 
 River Tyne. 
1798 The first brawl in the U.S. House of Representatives 
 took place. Congressmen Matthew Lyon and Roger Griswold 
 fought on the House floor. 
1847 The town of Yerba Buena was renamed San Francisco. 
1862 The U.S. Navy's first ironclad warship, the 
 "Monitor", was launched. 
1889 Rudolph, crown prince of Austria, and his 17-year-old 
 mistress, Baroness Marie Vetsera, were found shot in his 
 hunting lodge at Mayerling, near Vienna. 
1894 C.B. King received a patent for the pneumatic hammer. 
1910 Work began on the first board-track automobile speedway. 
 The track was built in Playa del Ray, CA. 
1911 The first airplane rescue at sea was made by the 
 destroyer "Terry." Pilot James McCurdy was forced to land 
 in the ocean about 10 miles from Havana, Cuba. 
1933 "The Lone Ranger" was heard on radio for the first 
 time. The program ran for 2,956 episodes and ended in 1955. 
1933 Adolf Hitler was named the German Chancellor. 
1948 Indian political and spiritual leader Mahatma Gandhi 
 was murdered by a Hindu extremist. 
1958 The first two-way moving sidewalk was put in service 
 at Love Field in Dallas, TX. The length of the walkway 
 through the airport was 1,435 feet. 
1964 The U.S. launched Ranger 6. The unmanned spacecraft 
 carried television cameras and was intentionally crash 
 landed on the moon. The cameras did not return any 
 pictures to Earth. 
1968 The Tet Offensive began as Communist forces launched 
 surprise attacks against South Vietnamese provincial 
 capitals. 
1972 In Northern Ireland, British soldiers shot and killed 
 thirteen Roman Catholic civil rights marchers. The day is 
 known as "Bloody Sunday." 
1979 The civilian government of Iran announced it had decided 
 to allow Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini to return. He had been 
 living in exile in France. 
1989 The U.S. embassy in Kabul, Afghanistan was closed. 
1995 The U.N. Security Council authorized the deployment of 
 a 6,000-member U.N. peace-keeping contingent to assume 
 security responsibilities in Haiti from U.S. forces. 
1995 Researchers from the U.S. National Institutes of 
 Health announced that clinical trials had demonstrated 
 the effectiveness of the first preventative treatment 
 for sickle cell anaemia. 
1996 Gino Gallagher, the reputed leader of the Irish 
 National Liberation Army, was shot and killed as he 
 queued for his unemployment benefit. 
1997 A New Jersey judge ruled that the unborn child of a 
 female prisoner must have legal representation. He denied 
 the prisoner bail reduction to enable her to leave the 
 jail and obtain an abortion. 
2002 Slobodan Milosevic accused the U.N. war crimes tribunal 
 of an "evil and hostile attack" against him. Milosevic 
 was defending his actions during the Balkan wars. 
2002 Japan's last coal mine was closed. The closures were 
 due to high production costs and cheap imports. 
2015  smiled.


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She is stagnant 



Good Morning, ,

Today is Thursday, January 29

Have FUN!
DearWebby


______________________________________________________
Today's Bonehead Award goes to 
a Florida man who asked a cop to borrow his gun
Details at Boneheads

Today, in 
 face of Leonardo DeVinci's Mona Lisa was caused by a 
 "...facial paralysis resulting from a swollen nerve 
 behind the ear." 
More of what happened on this day in history at History
______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Democracy consists of choosing your dictators, after they've told you what you think it is you want to hear. --- Alan Corenk ______________________________________________________ Trying to control her frizzy and dry hair, Kay treated her scalp with olive oil before washing it. Worried that the oil might leave an odor other than that her hair obviously needed it, she washed her hair several times with strong soap. That night when Kay went to bed, she leaned over to her husband and asked, "Do I smell like olive oil?" "Why ?" he asked, pulling back. "Do I smell like Popeye?" ______________________________________________________ Two priests were riding very fast on a motorcycle. They were stopped promptly by a policeman, who said, "What do you think you are doing? You were going mighty fast there, Father." The priest says, "We were just taking the bike for a spin...see how it runs." The policeman shakes his head. "Im going to have to give you a ticket. Driving like that isn't safe. What if you have an accident?" The priests say, "Don't worry, my son. Jesus is with us." The policeman says, "In that case, I have to book you. Three on a motorcycle falls under reckless driving." ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Roy for this picture: Click through for the big picture
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Deondrae Hall 38 Boynton Beach Florida Asked a cop to borrow his gun “Hey, let me use your gun!” Deondrae Hall asked a Florida detective walking into the Boynton Beach Police Department headquarters. “I need to use your gun to take care of some niggas who robbed me,” Hall explained. When his request was turned down by the cop, Hall petitioned a second officer who was leaving the precinct. “Hey I need to use your gun!,” he said. Those inquiries early Thursday morning resulted in the arrest of the 38-year-old Hall on a variety of criminal charges, according to a police report. Hall--who had been arguing with another man when he asked for a gun--was obviously intoxicated, noted cops, who added that the questions Hall posed “were not fitting for a person within his normal facilities to be asking a police officer.” After removing Hall “from his bicycle in which he straddled,” police arrested him for public intoxication. A subsequent search of Hall turned up a small bag of cocaine, for which he was charged with narcotics possession. Hall was also charged with corruption by threat for berating the two cops who declined to loan him their service revolvers. “I have a Glock 40 for your pussy ass bitch!” and “Fuck you juicy pussy cracker bitch!” were two of Hall’s comments. Hall was released Saturday from the Palm Beach County jail on $5000 bond and told to go borrow a gun somewhere else. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Joan Re: Windows Installer Dear Webby, Hope that you can provide a solution to my problem . I have a Toshiba Quismo  64 bit - Ultimate Vista 2008. The windows Installer has stopped operating - suddenly. Have been unable to locate it on my machine. Rest of the machine works well . Lacking the windows installer - I cannot download the windows updates or other programs and install them on the computer. Is it possible to find a substitution on the net that will help solve the problem. Many thanks for all the help that you have provided your followers. An avid follower for many years. Joan Dear Joan Here it is: http://www.microsoft.com/en-us/download/details.aspx?id=8483 Usually the cause of that fairly important file disappearing is a virus, that does not want you to download a decent anti-malware program. Run Malwarebytes and McAfee to clean up. You might have to download and install the Windows Installer first, before you can install anything else. Have FUN! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Rice Ice Pack This is a simple and quick project. We keep ours in the freezer and they are always ready for the large amount of boo-boos in our house. They always seem to make the kids feel better. You can use scraps of material, since you don't need too much. For this pack, I used an old t-shirt. You can make them any size you would like. By Becky [11] ______________________________________________________ A girl walked up to the information desk in a hospital and asked to see the "upturn". "I think you mean the 'intern', don't you?" asked the nurse on duty. "Whatever," said the girl. "I want to have a 'contamination.'" "You mean 'examination,'" the nurse corrected her. "Whatever, I want to go to the 'fraternity ward,' anyway." "I'm sure you mean the maternity ward." To which the girl replied: "Upturn, intern; contamination, examination, fraternity, maternity.... what's the difference? All I know is I haven't demonstrated in two months, and I think I'm stagnant."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt in confirmation request.
A Catholic priest, a Protestant minister, and a Jewish rabbi were discussing when life begins. "Life begins," said the priest, "at the moment of fertilization. That is when God instills the spark of life into the fetus." "We believe," said the minister, "that life begins at birth, because that is when the baby becomes an individual and is capable of making its own decisions and must learn about sin." "You've both got it wrong," said the rabbi. "Life begins when the children have graduated from college and moved out of the house." _____________________________________________________ A man in a hurry taking his 8-year-old son to school, made a turn at a red light where it was prohibited. "Uh-oh, I just made an illegal turn!" the man said. "Aw, Dad, it's okay" the son said. " The police car right behind us did the same thing."
Creative Photography

Today in 
1820 Britain's King George III died insane at Windsor Castle. 
1848 Greenwich Mean Time was adopted by Scotland. 
1886 The first successful petrol-driven motorcar, built by 
 Karl Benz, was patented. 
1916 In World War I, Paris was bombed by German zeppelins 
 for the first time. 
1924 R. Taylor patented the ice cream cone rolling machine. 
1940 The W. Atlee Burpee Seed Company displayed the first 
 tetraploid flowers at the New York City Flower Show. 
1949 "The Newport News" was commissioned as the first 
 air-conditioned naval ship in Virginia. 
1963 Britain was refused entry into the EEC. 
1979 U.S. President Carter formally welcomed Chinese 
 Vice Premier Deng Xiaoping to the White House. The 
 visit followed the establishment of diplomatic relations. 
1987 "Physician’s Weekly" announced that the smile on the 
 face of Leonardo DeVinci's Mona Lisa was caused by a 
 "...facial paralysis resulting from a swollen nerve 
 behind the ear." 
1990 Joseph Hazelwood, the former skipper of the Exxon 
 Valdez, went on trial in Anchorage, AK, on charges that 
 stemmed from America's worst oil spill. Hazelwood was 
 later acquitted of all the major charges and was 
 convicted of a misdemeanor. 
1996 French President Jacques Chirac announced the 
 "definitive end" to nuclear testing. 
1996 La Fenice, the 204 year old opera house in Venice, 
 was destroyed by fire. Arson was suspected. 
1997 America Online agreed to give refunds to frustrated 
 customers under threat of lawsuits across the country. 
 Customers were unable to log on after AOL offered a 
 flat $19.95-a-month rate. 
1998 A bomb exploded at an abortion clinic in Birmingham, 
 AL, killing an off-duty policeman and severely wounding 
 a nurse. Eric Rudolph was charged with this bombing and 
 three other attacks in Atlanta. 
1999 The U.S. Senate delivered subpoenas for Monica 
 Lewinsky and two presidential advisers for private, 
 videotaped testimony in the impeachment trial. 
2001 In Indonesia, thousands of student protesters stormed 
 the parliament property and demanded that President 
 Abdurrahman Wahid quit due to his alleged involvement 
 in two corruption scandals. Wahid announced that he 
 would not resign.
2015  smiled.


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