Dear Webby's Humor Letter
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Good Morning, ,
Today is Saturday, June 24

Have Fun!
Dearwebby

Todays Bonehead Award:
Texas mom messaged on Facebook while 
baby drowned in tub
 Boneheads
______________________________________________________
Today, June 23 in
1497 Italian explorer John Cabot, sailing in the service 
of England, landed in North America on what is now 
Newfoundland. He landed near the same area where the 
Vikings had settled for a while around 1050.
See More of what happened on this
day in history.
______________________________________________________
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______________________________________________________ People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for the freedom of thought which they seldom use. --- Soren Kierkegaard (1813 - 1855) Rudeness is the weak man's imitation of strength. --- Eric Hoffer (1902 - 1983) Every generation laughs at the old fashions, but follows religiously the new. --- Henry David Thoreau Better old fashions than no fashions! --- Socratex ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ >From Linda My three-year-old daughter stuck out her hand and said, Look at the fly I killed, Mommy. Since she was eating a juicy pickle at the time, I thrust her contaminated hands under the faucet and washed them with antibacterial soap. After sitting her down to finish her pickle, I asked, with a touch of awe, How did you kill that fly all by yourself? Between bites, she said, I hit it with my pickle. _____________________________________________________ Malwarebytes for Home | Anti-Malware Premium | Free Trial Download ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Dianne for this story: A knight and his men return to their castle after a long hard day of fighting. "How are we faring?" asks the king. "Sire," replies the knight, "I have been robbing and pillaging on your behalf all day, burning the towns of your enemies in the west." "What?!" shrieks the king. "I don't have any enemies to the west!" "Oh," says the knight. "Well, you do now." ______________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________
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______________________________________________________ Reported by the Bausell Sailor An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Cheyenne Summer Stuckey, 21, Fort Worth, Texas Texas mom messaged on Facebook while baby drowned in tub Police say a Texas mother was messaging on Facebook while her 8-month-old daughter drowned in a bathtub last week, reports CBS DFW. Cheyenne Summer Stuckey, 21, told investigators she put her daughter Zayla Hernandez in the tub in their suburban Fort Worth home on June 13 and left her unsupervised with the water running "for only a couple minutes," the station reports. She said she became "distracted" by another child, Facebook Messenger and a television playing loudly. But a Parker County sheriff's investigation revealed Stuckey was messaging two people on Facebook for at least 18 minutes while the infant was drowning, the station reports. Stuckey told investigators she rushed to check on the child when she realized she had forgotten about her, but found her floating in the tub face-down and unresponsive. Stuckey said she tried to resuscitate the girl but "did not know how." She told investigators she wasn't sure if she had placed a bathtub stopper in the drain. Emergency responders weren't able to resuscitate the girl, and she was pronounced dead at a hospital. A Tarrant County Medical Examiner's preliminary autopsy report revealed Zayla died from drowning. Stuckey was booked in to the Parker County Jail and charged with injury to a child. Her bond has not been set. Several other children in the home were reportedly removed and placed in foster care. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Vin Re: Toolbars and icons Dear Webby, Every program I install seems to come with some silly toolbar that has maybe one icon on it that I use and half a dozen that are totally useless. If they have so little confidence in their program that they feel they have to provide an UN- install icon on prime, easy to get to, toolbar space, why sell it in the first place? How can I restrict all those silly toolbars to just one icon? Vin DearVin You can't. Just delete all those silly little toolbars. Make desktop shortcuts to the programs that you need, then make a desktop folder and drag them in there. Next you drag that folder into a subdirectory, and make one desktop shortcut icon for that. That way YOU control which icons are taking up space. Have FUN! DearWebby
An elderly couple were sitting on their front porch one evening, when the wife picks up her cane and whaps her husband across the shins. "Dangit, woman! What the heck was that for?" he yells. "That's for 60 years of bad sex," she replies. A few minutes later, the husband picks up his cane and whaps his wife across the shins. "Ow!!" she yells. "What the heck was THAT for??" The husband looks at her and says, "That's for knowing the difference."
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Thoroughly Cleaning A Cast Iron Fry Pan By likekinds [346 Posts, 1,496 Comments] You can tell me not to use soap on my cast iron pans til the cows come home. I will use it, anyway. I refuse to put away a pan that has only been scraped and wiped. To me, that borders on 'nasty'. I make country style gravy in my cast iron frying pan. I fry thinly sliced sweet potatoes sprinkled with brown sugar, in that pan, cooking till the sugar is syrupy or caramelized. Imagine just 'wiping' that pan. If the pan is properly seasoned, hot, soapy water will not affect that season. Almost always, a ruined season is due to overheating an empty pan while preheating it. When preheating a pan, don't allow it to get hot enough to smoke. If you see even the slight smoke, don't just turn down the heat, remove the pan from the heat. The inside bottom of a well seasoned pan will be smooth and shiny. No scrubbing should be required. The inside walls of the pan will often be rougher. Scrub these with something no more abrasive than a plastic mesh ball or a nylon brush. Soak the pan for a while if need be. Never use steel wool, nylon pads, or powdered cleansers on a pan. When the pan is clean and rinsed, put it on a burner at medium heat. Watch carefully. The instant all water is burned way, remove the pan from the heat and allow to cool. With a paper towel, apply a thin film of cooking oil to the pan before putting it away. If you have cooked fish or onions in the pan, you can rest assured the next time you scramble eggs, they will taste of fish or onions, if you only wipe the pan 'clean'. Even soap and hot water will not remove these scents. Removing lingering scents from a pan is simple. After washing and rinsing the pan, fill with water and place on medium heat burner. Add a tablespoon of baking soda to the water. Simmer two or three minutes and rinse, then back to the burner to dry. I find drying the pan with heat is more thorough, thus preventing any rust, especially on the bottom where it is most likely to appear. It's like this, I wash my cast iron pans in hot, soapy water after every use; I always have. An egg will slide around in my pan as if the pan was coated with Teflon or T fal. Where are those cows, anyway? It's time for their evening milking.
____________________________________________________
Baby elephant chasing birds
____________________________________________________ When an applicant asked if the company had a fitness program, the human resources manager replied, "Oh, our employees don't need one. They are routinely jumping to conclusions, flying off the handle, beating around the bush, running down the boss, going around in circles, dragging their feet, dodging responsibility, passing the buck, climbing the ladder, hiding in paperwork, pulling strings, throwing their weight around, stretching the truth, bending the rules, stabbing others in their backs and pushing their luck!" ___________________________________________________
Awesome photos of powerful storms.
The psychiatrist was interviewing a first-time patient. "You say you're here," he inquired, "because your family is worried about your taste in socks?" "That's correct," muttered the patient. "I like wool socks." "But that's perfectly normal," replied the doctor. "Many people prefer wool socks to those made from cotton or acrylic. In fact, I myself like wool socks." "You DO?" exclaimed the man excitedly. "With oil and vinegar or just a squeeze of lemon?"
Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
____________________________________________________ Jones is driving past the state mental hospital when his left rear tire suffers a flat. While Jones is changing the tire, another car goes by, running over the hub cap in which Jones was keeping the lug nuts. The nuts are all knocked into a nearby storm drain. Jones is at a loss for what to do and is about to go call a cab when he hears a shout from behind the hospital fence, where one of the inmates has been watching the whole thing. "Hey, pal! Why don't you just take one lug nut off each of the other three wheels? That'll hold your tires on until you can get to a garage or something." Jones is startled by the patient's seeming rationality, but realizes the plan will work, and installs the spare tire without incident. Before he leaves, he calls back to the patient. "You know, that was pretty sharp thinking. Why do they have you in there?" The patient smiles and says, "I'm in here because I'm crazy, not because I'm stupid."
____________________________________________________

Today, on June 24, in
1314 Scottish forces led by Robert the Bruce won over Edward
II of England at the Battle of Bannockburn in Scotland. 

1340 The English fleet defeated the French fleet at Sluys, off
the Flemish coast. 

1497 Italian explorer John Cabot, sailing in the service of
England, landed in North America on what is now Newfoundland. 
s
1509 Henry VIII was crowned King of England. 

1664 New Jersey, named after the Isle of Jersey, was founded. 

1675 King Philip's War began when Indians massacre colonists
at Swansee, Plymouth colony. 

1717 The Freemasons were founded in London. 

1793 The first republican constitution in France was adopted. 

1812 Napoleon crossed the Nieman River and invaded Russia. 

1844 Charles Goodyear was granted U.S. patent #3,633 for
vulcanized rubber. 

1859 At the Battle of Solferino, also known as the Battle of
the Three Sovereigns, the French army led by Napoleon III
defeated the Austrian army under Franz Joseph I in northern
Italy. 

1861 Federal gunboats attacked Confederate batteries at
Mathias Point, Virginia. 

1862 U.S. intervention saved the British and French at the
Dagu forts in China. 

1910 The Japanese army invaded Korea. 

1913 Greece and Serbia annulled their alliance with Bulgaria
following border disputes over Macedonia and Thrace. 

1931 The Soviet Union and Afghanistan signed a treaty of
neutrality. 

1940 France signed an armistice with Italy. 

1940 TV cameras were used for the first time in a political
convention as the Republicans convened in Philadelphia, PA. 

1941 U.S. President Franklin Roosevelt pledged all possible
support to the Soviet Union. 

1947 Kenneth Arnold reported seeing flying saucers over Mt.
Rainier, Washington. 

1948 The Soviet Union began the Berlin Blockade. 

1955 Soviet MIG's down a U.S. Navy patrol plane over the
Bering Strait. 

1964 The Federal Trade Commission announced that starting in
1965, cigarette manufactures would be required to include
warnings on their packaging about the harmful effects of
smoking. 

1968 "Resurrection City," a shantytown constructed as part of
the Poor People's March on Washington D.C., was closed down by
authorities. 

1970 The U.S. Senate voted overwhelmingly to repeal the Gulf
of Tonkin Resolution. 

1982 The U.S. Supreme Court ruled 5-4 that no president could
be sued for damages connected with actions taken while serving
as President of the United States. 

1986 The Empire State Building was designated a National
Historic Landmark. 

1997 The U.S. Air Force released a report titled "The Roswell
Report, Case Closed" that dismissed the claims that an alien
spacecraft had crashed in Roswell, NM, in 1947. 

1998 AT&T Corp. struck a deal to buy cable TV giant Tele-
Communications Inc. for $31.7 billion. 

1998 Walt Disney World Resort admitted its 600-millionth
guest.

2002 The U.S. Supreme Court ruled that juries, not judges,
must make the decision to give a convicted killer the death
penalty. 

2002 A painting from Monet's Waterlilies series sold for $20.2
million. 

2003 In Paris, France, manuscripts by novelist Georges Simenon
brought in $325,579. The original manuscript of "La Mort de
Belle" raised $81,705. 

2017  smiled.

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